i’m sorry!got7 x reader(poly)
Proofread to the best of my ability
This has to happen. There's no way she could honestly stay with them. Those seven boys who showed their love to her almost ruthlessly. They made her heart swell with gratitude and appreciation every second she was around them. She knew what it felt like to feel unappreciated. She was the most underappreciated person she knew. She gave and gave, not wanting to receive anything back, but it does feel good to be appreciated. It feels good to know that you're wanted and that you are an intricate part of someone's life, to know that you aren't wasting your time. She felt like she she was wasting her time. There were seven of them for Gods sakes! They didn't need her. When it came down to it, she wasn't an intricate part of their life and routine. She wasn't important to them. She didn't know what she did to deserve their friendship, attention, or time, but all she could say was that she was eternally grateful.
bambam: y/n! coming over today right?
yugyeom: she said she would
jackson: you do that bomb ass braid out bc girrrrrlllll!
mark: ha! JB a weirdo acting like he doesn't wanna know too
jinyoung: yo crackheads...stfu
youngjae: y/n!!!!! im excited to see youuu
I'm excited to see y'all too!! See you 💓💓
jackson: HEARTS AAAAHHHHH
y/n was trying not to cry. She had to be strong or else this wasn't going to be easy for anyone. Sending that text was one of the hardest things she has ever had to do in her life.
"You can do this, y/n. Like a bandaid, girl, just like a bandaid." She tried to coax herself as she grabbed her keys, putting her phone in her back pocket. She walked outside her apartment, locked her door, and went to her best friend, Amika Ravenloc's car. She got inside. "You sure about this y/n?" She asked, turning to look at her. "No, but I know that I have to do this. I feel myself just falling for them more and more everyday and that shit is scary. I'm gonna end it before they can... Amika, I'm scared." Y/n confessed, her nerves finally getting to her. She started shaking. "I know, hun. I know." Amika patted her knee. "If this is what you want to do, then do it. I'll be there for you afterwards. You can cry all you want and we'll have a movie night, all the stuff you like. You got this." Amika pepped her up. She started driving. "I'll stay parked, like, down the street so you can just come to the car when you're done and I'll, just, zoom off. They won't catch me." She explained. Y/n nodded. "I got you." She agreed.
Amika got to their place pretty quick which meant the two girls would get out of there even faster. "I'm right here. You got this, girl." She told y/n. Y/n took a deep breath. She fiddled with Jaebum's hoodie that she decided to wear. Was it a smart decision? No, not really. It only makes things harder. She opened the door and walked to the boys' house. She got to their doorstep. She went to knock but hesitated. Was she really doing this? Was she really about to end this beautiful friendship? "It's best for all of us y/n. You can do this." She coaxed herself to knock on the door.
"Y/n!!" Jackson shouted, swinging the door open. She almost broke down right then and there. She couldn't help but burst out laughing as she hugged him. "Jackson!" She exclaim. The two of them headed to the living room area after Jackson locked the door. "I missed you!" He held y/n close. "Guys, look who's here!" He announced. The room erupted in shouts of happy greetings. Yugyeom tackled her with a big hug. They both almost went down. "You have socks on dummy!" Y/n laughed. "I missed you y/n!"He cupped her face, gushing at her. "Stop hogging her Yugyeom!" Mark exclaimed from the couch. Y/n couldn't stop smiling.
"What were y'all doing?" She asked. "We were just talking about random stuff." Mark answered. "Y/n, come here." Jaebum patted his lap. Y/n's heart started beating triple in speed. This is what she was talking about. They were getting too close. "Nah, I'm okay." She waved it off, sitting in a chair by the doorway. Jaebum looked at her confused. "Come. Here." He said again. Damnit. She just couldn't say no to him. Y/n stood up, lips pursed, and went to Jaebum. He pulled her to sit on his lap, wrapping his arms around her. "JB hyung at it again!" BamBam laughed. "He stay on y/n." Youngjae joked. "This my baby, what y'all mean?" Jaebum laid his head on her shoulder. "You did do that braid out! I'm dead." Jackson over dramatically died. "She looks so good!" Yugyeom made weird noises.
"Um, hi Jinyoung! You weren't gonna say something to me?" Y/n joked with him. "Don't start." Jinyoung laughed. Y/n mimicked his laugh making everyone else laugh. Jinyoung stood up, moving towards her. "You think you funny, huh?" He held her chin with one hand, making her look at him. "Oh, I know I'm funny." She stuck her tongue out at him. He couldn't help the smile that spread on his face, letting her go and went back to his seat. "You wanna watch a movie? We haven't had a movie night in forever." Youngjae suggested. "That sounds like a great idea!" Mark clapped his hands. "I'll go make the popcorn!" Yugyeom ran to the kitchen. "Bust yo ass, see if we don't laugh!" Y/n shouted. Bambam laughed out loud, following Yugyeom. "I'll go get the movies! Cmon Youngjae!" Jackson exclaimed, pulling a protesting Youngjae along. "Cute." Mark commented, bopping y/n's nose. He went to go get blankets. This was getting way out of hand.
"Guys-" "Sit by me y/n!" Jackson exclaimed. "No, me!" Youngjae argued. "She's staying in my lap so yall gonna have to sit by me." Jaebum pointed out. "Hyung!" Yugyeom whined from the kitchen. Bambam came into the room. "You guys-" "Animated movie or action movie?" Jackson asked. "Animated." Jinyoung answered. "No, action." Mark shook his head. "Both!" Yugyeom walked in with the popcorn. "Y'ALL!" Y/n shouted, forcing Jaebum's arms off from around her. Everyone focused on her. She backed up to the doorway. "I-I have to go. Like, forever." She stuttered. She never stuttered. Smart transition y/n! She scolded herself. "Why? Is something wrong?" Jaebum questioned. "Yes. This..us..I can't be friends with you guys anymore. It won't work. I'm sorry." She turned to leave but Jaebum's booming voice made her freeze. "Explanation please."
Y/n took a deep breath. "Where is this coming from?" Mark asked. "I just can't, okay?! I don't want to be friends with you guys anymore. There shouldn't need to be an explanation. It's just gonna hurt more later. It's gotta stop now." She started crying. "No the fuck it doesn't. Y/n, you're not making sense-" "Yugyeom." "No, hyung! She can't just up and leave us without reason! I won't let her." Jinyoung held his shoulder. "Sunshine. Are you sure you want to leave?" Youngjae asked. She bit her lip. "We can talk it out. We'll listen to you. We can figure this out." Jackson said, voice full of concern and understanding. "No. I'm not your sunshine! I don't..I don't..I just don't!" Y/n broke down even harder, almost doubling over. She took off the hoodie, looking at it sullenly. She threw it to the ground out of a mix of emotions. "Y/n, just have a seat and we can-" "Don't touch me, Jaebum. Just let me, just, just, let me alone!" Y/n ran to the front door, unlocked it as fast as she could, then ran to Amika's car. Shouts could be heard from the boys and feet pelted the ground, meaning they were chasing her.
"Go, go, go!" She screamed, jumping in through the window, something she never thought she would ever do in her life. The situation was so terrible, she literally leapt at the opportunity to get out as fast as she could. The car took off. The boys looked exasperated as they stopped running after her. They were too confused.
Y/n laid in the backseat of the car, covering her face with her hands. She sobbed and sobbed till she was too tired to keep going and let the tears fall silently. "Did I just fuck up Amika?" She asked, voice hoarse and cracking. "That's up to you to decide. You broke it off with them so this would happen now instead of later, right? You accomplished your goal. You're free. That's what you wanted." Amika answered. "Yeah..what I wanted." Y/n sighed. Tears for now instead of later. Hurt them before they can hurt you. That was the goal, right?
"What just happened?" Youngjae asked as Mark, Jaebum, Jackson and Yugyeom walked back into the living room. "She has to be joking. There's no way she really just ended our friendship like she just did. It doesn't make sense." Mark looked at the boys confused, sullen, and scared faces. "Without an explanation, too. I don't know about you guys, but I'm pissed right now." Jackson said, tapping his foot. His expression was stone cold and his arms were crossed. "How about we just text her? See if she'll tell us in the group chat." BamBam suggested. "We can try." Youngjae shrugged.
Jaebum went to pick up his jacket from off of the floor. He sighed. "Looks like I'm going to her house." He said. "Don't do that." Jinyoung shook his head. "Why not?" Jaebum questioned "You see how hard she was crying. It must have taken a lot to do what she just did. I think we are the last people she wants to communicate with." Jinyoung answered. "What did we do wrong?" All eyes turned to Yugyeom who was sitting on the floor, staring at his hands. "We didn't do anything wrong to hurt her did we? I could've swore we were, we, we made her so happy, but she still left. Why did she leave, hyungs? What did we do?" The poor maknae was so confused and hurt that he started to cry. "Yugyeom, don't, please." Jaebum went to hug him. "She's the best, hyung! She's pretty and funny and she fits in perfectly, so why?" Yugyeom allowed himself to cry in his hyungs arms. "I don't know. I don't know." Jaebum stroked his hair.
"We're here." Amika said, pulling into her driveway. Y/n sat up, her head pounding. Amika went to go unlock her front door. Y/n shortly followed. Amika locked her car then her front door and the two girls settled down on the couch. "I'm going to order some pizza and we'll get this sleepover started!" She cheered. Y/n cracked a smile. She turned on the tv, turning it to her favorite channel. Watching her favorite TV show always cheered her up. "Let's watch-" y/n's phone went off. "I didn't know it was..oh wait." She stopped when she realized it was a special ringtone she set for just the boys. Her phone buzzed relentlessly. She wanted to check it but Amika beat her to it. She turned off her phone and set it down in the kitchen. "They won't ruin our night, right? Let's have some fun!!" Amika cheered. Y/n smiled and joined it, her spirits being lifted with the sheer excitement her best friend radiated. Tonight was about her and her best friend, not those seven boys who aren't in her life anymore, despite what her heart says.
It's been a few weeks and everything has been going smoothly. Y/n has been getting better as time progressed. She took a break from her phone, knowing the hundreds of texts they've sent her would be there. Missed calls, emails even, that she knew were awaiting for her. She decided to focus on working. She worked at a cafe that was, thankfully, unknown to the boys. She knew it would be a good idea to not tell them because she knew they would be a public disturbance. BamBam trying his best to bust a move to the chill music, Youngjae's loud laugh, Jackson screaming and being the extra person he was, Mark joining in on the antics, Yugyeom whining and bothering her, all the while, Jaebum and Jinyoung, defeatedly, sat back and watched the chaos unfold. Y/n caught herself smiling at the vision and her nose started burning while her eyes started welling up with tears. "Be right back." She told her coworker, Edyn, a dark skinned woman with short 4c hair. Y/n went to the bathroom.
"Pull yourself together. This was the right decision. You don't need them. You just want them. Need and want are two different things. Get it together, girl. Get it together." Y/n took a deep breath and fixed her face. Random waves of emotion weren't a surprise anymore. It was all apart of the process. She knew that she would get over it eventually. However long eventually was. She went back out behind the counter. "Sorry about that." She apologized. "Girl, are you sure you're okay? You've been going to the bathroom to cry for weeks now. Did something happen?" Edyn asked. She could read y/n like an open book. "I just ended a friendship is all." Y/n answered. "Ending things should be a joyous occasion. You should feel free of whatever that friendship had. Was it toxic?" Edyn questioned. "No. It was perfect actually. Too perfect, and I had to end it before it hurt me." Y/n rubbed her arm, moving to look at the cookies. "Before it hurt you? Honey, you're going to get hurt a lot in your life. Avoiding it and being scared of it is no way to live. Your mindset wasn't in the right place when you made the decision to end that friendship. You were playing to your own delusion, thinking of only yourself. I know you're not a selfish person. Whoever was apart of that friendship is probably the best ever and you let your mind trick you into thinking otherwise. Now, I know you don't like being told what you already know, but you should go talk to whoever it was. They probably want to hear from you, too." Edyn hugged the melanin infused girl. The bell rang, signaling another customer. "There goes another one. Take the rest of the day off. I'll cover for you." She winked at y/n. She couldn't have been more thankful for Edyn in that moment. Y/n went home as soon as possible.
"Go back to them? There's no way I could. I ended it and that's final. What kind of person would I be to end a friendship then go back to them like nothing ever happened? I'd be a joke." She sighed, sitting on her couch, watching TV. "They wouldn't want anything to do with me. I couldn't go back even if I wanted to." Three loud knocks came from her front door. She jumped, startled.
"Y/n? Are you home?" It was Jackson's voice. "Open up. We really want to talk." Mark shouted. "You haven't answered any of our texts or calls or voicemails. We're really worried." BamBam revealed. "Maybe she isn't home." Jinyoung said. "Her car is here, she has to be home." Jackson clicked his tongue. "She doesn't have to be home. She could've gotten an Uber. You never know. In any case, we should leave." Jinyoung sighed. "I'm not leaving. I'm going to see her. She can't stay in there forever." Yugyeom put his back against the door. "This again, Yugyeom, cmon." "Don't touch me, hyung!" "Both of you stop!" Jaebum's booming voice yelled. Y/n jumped. "Let's just go." He stormed off. "Hyung.." "Sunshine. If you're really in there this time, please open the door. We need you right now." Youngjae cried. After a few minutes of silence, there was a shout, the sound of car doors slamming shut, and a tire screech with a roaring engine, signaling the boy's departure. That was when y/n let it all out.
They needed her yet she still stayed put. She didn't do anything when she should have. If that wasn't an indication that she was wrong to end the friendship, then she didn't what was the truth anymore. She wanted desperatly to convince herself that she did the right thing, but the way her heart hurt with every beat, she knew that she was wrong to leave. She blew her nose then went to her front door. She opened it, seeing a note on her door and a box. It was the box of jackets and other clothes she sent to return to the boys. She didn't have it in her to personally deliver them.
Keep them. They're yours. Don't forget us and please check your phone. We hope for happiness and health to be the only thing you receive for the rest of your life. We love you, sunshine. - JB
That sent her into another fit of hysterical tears. She ripped the box open, grabbing a hoodie, it was Mark's, and clutched it. She held it so, so tight. This was suppose to prevent this from happening but it hurt way more than them breaking her heart like she thought. She was being so stubborn and for what? She just needs to face reality and go back to them. Admit that she was wrong because she was. There was no positive outcome for any of this.
Y/n took the box inside and closed her door, relocking it. She sent the note down on her coffee table and turned on her phone for the first time in weeks. She knew there would be a lot of missed texts and calls but this was ridiculous.
yugyeom: im desperate to hear your voice
yugyeom: let me know you're okay
mark: jackson and jb argued again..
jackson: i punched jb hyung. I didn't mean it
youngjae: coco misses you so much. she wants her mommy back
mark: she hasn't been eating. im scared for her
youngjae: all she does now is mope around. I try to take her out but all she does is lead me to your house...
bambam: come dab with me again
jinyoung: come dab with everyone again.
jb: youngjae cried again. there was almost no calming him down this time. he misses his sunshine. we all miss our sunshine. please come brighten our lives again. i beg you
mark: i almost broke my phone from throwing it when i saw no reply. i miss you hun. i rly do
jackson: come home to us. i swear we'll be on our best behavior just come back please
jinyoung: i almost put jackson out. he keeps getting an attitude with everyone. he's just hurting but it's too much sometimes
jb: Lord, I pray that you bring our sunshine back into our lives. Amen.
There were many more texts saying the same thing. It was a shock that they actually fought each other. Sure, they argued here and there but physically punching was something y/n never witnessed. That was all it took for her to make up her mind. She was going to go back, explain everything, and make everything better. She decided to go after work the next day.
She went to work early in the morning the next day to fully plan out everything she would say. She had the next seven hours to figure out her game plan. "It is too early in the morning to be looking like that. What's got you so happy?" Edyn joked, wiping down the counter. "You were right. I'm going back to the friendship after work today. I haven't seen them in, like, three months. Needless to say that I'm excited." Y/n beamed. "I'm glad." Edyn smiled proudly at the girl. "Time to open." She went to go turn the sign to open.
Business was going smooth as ever. Y/n was currently calculating a customer's reciept. The bell rang and she handed the receipt to the customer. She went to get a small menu of the specials for the day. "Hello! How may I help you..." Her scentence trailed off when she realized that Jaebum was the one standing in front of her. "Oh, um, hey..I can get you the, um.." Y/n's brain short circuited. "When's your break?" He asked. "In, like, an hour." She answered. "Well, you're off work now." Jaebum grabbed her hand and lead her from behind the counter. "Edyn! My friend is taking me away! Will you be okay?" She shouted. "You didn't tell me your friend was fine! Go on!" Edyn waved. Y/n smiled. Edyn was the best.
"Where are we going?" Y/n questioned as Jaebum stopped in front of the passenger side of his car. Jaebum looked at her then cupped her face and kissed her. "We're going home." He answered. He unlocked the car, making her get in. He ran to the drivers side and hopped in. Y/n was at a lost for words the whole car ride. Jaebum kissed her like it was nothing. His lips were soft and moisturized. Did he know he was going to see her? Y/n would never know.
"We're here." He announced. He wasted no time getting out of the car and y/n followed. Jaebum grabbed her hand, almost dragging her to their house. He quickly unlocked the door. "Hyung, did you get the coffee that quick?" BamBam asked. "I got one better." Jaebum stated. He walked with y/n into the living room. "Hi, guys." She greeted them with tears in her eyes.
After thirty minutes of greetings, long, tight hugs, and crying, everyone was sitting down. Y/n sat in the love seat by herself, facing the boys. "Why did you leave for three months?" Jackson asked, getting straight to the point. Y/n took a deep breath. "I was scared and I was wrong. I felt that you guys didn't want to have me around. You guys are so amazing and wonderful and I didn't feel worthy of that. All my life, I was someone else's second choice so to be you guys' first and only choice felt so weird. I wouldn't allow myself to even think that your feelings were genuine. I was so scared of getting hurt again that I thought if I ended it before you guys did that it would be the best for everyone. I was so wrong. I'm so, so sorry I did that to you guys without warning. I was selfish and I really don't deserve your friendship after the bullshit I pulled. I..I.." She started shedding tears. She tried her best to keep it in, sniffling and such. Yugyeom got up to hug her. "We never knew that. I'm happy that you shared that with us. We're scared too. This does seem too good to be true for us as well." Mark said. "Really? Why?" Y/n questioned. "Because we love you." Yugyeom answered. "I love you guys, too." She held Yugyeom closer.
"No, y/n. We have feelings for you. All seven of us." Jinyoung confirmed. "What?" Y/n asked, wiping her tears. Yugyeom sat down beside her, pulling her into his lap. He held her close. "We realized this when you were gone. Yugyeom was crying one day and he just blurted it out and we all agreed. We didn't want to admit it to ourselves but we all have equally fallen for you. Please, don't think that this is weird or anything. We are so genuine, it's crazy." Jinyoung pleaded. "I don't think it's weird at all. I thought I was the weird one! I even told Amika that I felt like I was falling more and more for you guys. I thought I was just being greedy and shit like that but it can't get anymore genuine than these tears right here." Y/n smiled at the boys.
"Well, since this went much more smoothly than we thought, y/n, would you do us the honor of being our sunshine for good?" BamBam asked. "Yes!" She exclaimed. There was a mix of relief and excited cheers. "I've been waiting a long time to do this!" Yugyeom exclaimed, dipping her in his lap, kissing her to oblivion. Y/n couldn't stop smiling. "Coco!" She cooed at the little dog. She held her close, petting her. She licked her face with her little doggy tongue. Jackson walked over and held her chin, guiding her face to his and gave her a deep kiss. "Um, don't start something you can't finish." Y/n warned, looking up at him with a different kind of look in her eye. "Maybe I want to." He winked at her. "Hey! Keep it pg-13!" Jinyoung joked. Everyone laughed. The rest of the evening was spent having the movie night that should've happened three months ago. It was filled with kisses, laughs, screams, tears, and much more. These seven boys showed y/n that you'll always come back to where you belong, no matter how far away you may go.
August 27th, 2018 // 2:00am
izzy806
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theartofmadeline
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