Porcelain Face

I am PorcelainFace! I'm a free time artist I make sick sketches! comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable that's my style babyyyy~ used to be corvid detector

[porcelain-face-art]

Small intro post here- or re intro post?

Hello! I used to be corvid detector!

However I ran out of time- was gone for a while

And now I'll post my art here :)

Since that's my actual "obsession"

Get it? The pic above? I'm still funny right?

Have a good one! Many hugs for all of yall

[porcelain-face-art]

Am I "insane"

Well perhaps my drawing style is- my arms

Do not thank me-

Mayby you will? Teehee:)

[porcelain-face-art]

You ever had "expectation" that something would happen but it didn't?

Yeaaaah....

I drew that xD

[porcelain-face-art]

"close"

I'm not too happy how most of this one turned out cus I didn't know how to finish it xD

But get stared at anyway :)

[porcelain-face-art]

Be disturbed- or be comforted?

Either way you're looking at it already

[crow-offical]

The Offical Murder:

Me

@raven-offical

@murder--offical

@corviddetector

Any corvid is welcome to join. Just say you wanna join.

CAW CAW

I will update this post when new members join.

[porcelain-face-art]

Caw. Caw caw.

Caaaaw.

Caw.

Cawwwh.

[crow-offical]

Caw Caw

Just a offical crow.

Searching for corvids to join the official murder.

The official murder (not to be confused with @murder--offical, who is a murderererer): me, @raven-offical

Herald of @grim-reaper-offical

CAW CAW

[murder--offical]

:o

can I be a crowwww and join the murder !!!

[the-gun-licker]

@corviddetector

[porcelain-face-art]

ofFIIICIALLLLL CAWWW CAWWW detected

HELL YEAH HONOURED BATTLE BROTHER

Lead me to the slaughter- I meant the uh

The murder.

Yes.

Ignore the dreadnought from 40k that's not important for right now-

-Hecking official corvid detected-

-is this as premium as those oddly overpriced kiwis that look different but taste the same?-

[crow-offical]

it’s offical not official.

And oMG you don’t know about the officalverse.

[porcelain-face-art]

-inhales-

I know enough to say that my eyes had simply deceived me, but my jokes landed nonetheless.

[crow-offical]

Caw Caw

Just a offical crow.

Searching for corvids to join the official murder.

The official murder (not to be confused with @murder--offical, who is a murderererer): me, @raven-offical

Herald of @grim-reaper-offical

CAW CAW

[murder--offical]

:o

can I be a crowwww and join the murder !!!

[the-gun-licker]

@corviddetector

[porcelain-face-art]

ofFIIICIALLLLL CAWWW CAWWW detected

HELL YEAH HONOURED BATTLE BROTHER

Lead me to the slaughter- I meant the uh

The murder.

Yes.

Ignore the dreadnought from 40k that's not important for right now-

-Hecking official corvid detected-

-is this as premium as those oddly overpriced kiwis that look different but taste the same?-

[secondlina]

It's dangerous to go alone...

[dead-cthulhu-band]

@corviddetector

[porcelain-face-art]

-inhales-

I'm gonna say it.....

-HAMMER TIME-

-cute corvid detected-

-im taking him-

[crowthecleo-deactivated20251204]

not if i take him first

[porcelain-face-art]

Your mortal flesh can attempt to do so, but it shall fail you nonetheless.

[scrambled-pine]

to assist in defending the murder, you have my blade

[porcelain-face-art]

Honored brother,

I beeseech thineself to explain, how thine humble bread cutter. Is going to hurt an avian creature, which, upon closer inspection, can fly-

Nonetheless, honoured battle brother, we, do appreciate the sentiment

(also, before anybody tries to -fuck- me for saying brother to anybody at all in this context, it just fits, so it sits)[like a cat.] {In a cardboard box}

[secondlina]

It's dangerous to go alone...

[dead-cthulhu-band]

@corviddetector

[porcelain-face-art]

-inhales-

I'm gonna say it.....

-HAMMER TIME-

-cute corvid detected-

-im taking him-

[crowthecleo-deactivated20251204]

not if i take him first

[porcelain-face-art]

Your mortal flesh can attempt to do so, but it shall fail you nonetheless.

[crowthecleo-deactivated20251204]

okay but like im a crow i can just like fly its not even that hard

[porcelain-face-art]

Since crows have been observed lifting over 1.5 times their body weight, this is in fact true...

But you know what else flies?

The Lockheed sr 71 blackbird. An advanced long range strategic reconnaissance aircraft capable of mach 3 and an altitude of eighty five thousand feet

And yes. THIS IS A HELLSING REFERENCE.

[crowthecleo-deactivated20251204]

i think youd kinda go too fast and pass by me

[porcelain-face-art]

Do you even know what the effect of a physical object traveling even near you at mach 3, would have on your, very physically vulnerable, hollow boned body my feathered friend?

Let me describe the carnage this metal tincan of hope, violence, and absolutely speed

Would unleash

Pov: standing near a object flying Mach 3^

[secondlina]

It's dangerous to go alone...

[dead-cthulhu-band]

@corviddetector

[porcelain-face-art]

-inhales-

I'm gonna say it.....

-HAMMER TIME-

-cute corvid detected-

-im taking him-

[crowthecleo-deactivated20251204]

not if i take him first

[porcelain-face-art]

Your mortal flesh can attempt to do so, but it shall fail you nonetheless.

[crowthecleo-deactivated20251204]

okay but like im a crow i can just like fly its not even that hard

[porcelain-face-art]

Since crows have been observed lifting over 1.5 times their body weight, this is in fact true...

But you know what else flies?

The Lockheed sr 71 blackbird. An advanced long range strategic reconnaissance aircraft capable of mach 3 and an altitude of eighty five thousand feet

And yes. THIS IS A HELLSING REFERENCE.

[secondlina]

It's dangerous to go alone...

[dead-cthulhu-band]

@corviddetector

[porcelain-face-art]

-inhales-

I'm gonna say it.....

-HAMMER TIME-

-cute corvid detected-

-im taking him-

[crowthecleo-deactivated20251204]

not if i take him first

[porcelain-face-art]

Your mortal flesh can attempt to do so, but it shall fail you nonetheless.

[motto-chanto-itte]

sometimes it's OK to skip a song you like when u don't feel like it at that moment. u r not hurting its feelings

[the-skipped-song-offical]

Dude dw it didn't. I'm fine

[microwavemad]

Are you SURE

[hands-you-a-spatula]

Hands you a spatula

[gimmickblog-posts]

certified gimmick post

[a-random-ufo]

flies overhead

[porcelain-face-art]

-NO CORVIDs detected-

Caw caw bisches

[danhoemei]

My friends who just got their first glasses: i need this highly expensive special cloth to wipe them, I also have this eyeglass cleaner from the same company, did you know you shouldn't use your t shirt unless it's specifically soft

Me who's worn glasses since middle school: *slaps soap onto the glasses and washes them in the sink then wipes them with toilet paper* what

[danhoemei]

Did I stutter

[danhoemei]

No

[danhoemei]

Mah men

[danhoemei]

Our ranks are getting stronger

[annalyticall]

[dante-heller]

[porcelain-face-art]

AS AN OPTICIAN IM STORMING INTO HERE-

-ahum- so... Dish soap? Absolutely fine-apart from the fact it often has beneficial fats for skin-care which means you'll get fat streaks sometimes which, I mean, don't make you l o o k good, cus... Fat on glass

Alcohol- No. No. No. Alcohol is a remnant of glass lenses. And plastic frames hate alcohol

The fuckin, little "lens cleaner cloths" that come with glasses? Should be cleaned at least every week+

Why? Cus the thing that actually scratches your lenses is -D U S T-

the only reason your not allowed to use Tshirts, and toilet paper and other junk- is cus they usually sit in a room! Where they gather dust

So they fuck the lenses over longer time with the dust on it

That's why your supposed to -rinse off- your lenses with water. This removes the dust on the lenses, it ain't for the cleaning specifically, it's just so you don't destroy the lenses with the basic equivalent of sandpaper(dust)

Thanks for listening to my Ted talk

There's no Corvids in this post

[dankmemeuniversity]

[apathetic-revenant]

demon: YOU HAVE SUMMONED ME, MORTAL. WHAT DEAL DO YOU WISH TO STRIKE WITH THE POWERS OF HELL?

roomba: [is a roomba]

demon:

roomba:

demon:

roomba:

demon: man c’mon you gotta work with me here a little bit

[poppetawoppet]

roomba: *slowly spells on floor* K N I F E

demon: ahhhhh I see. You have heard the legend of Stabby.

roomba: *vibrates excitedly*

[colby-jac-cheese]

demon: *lovingly tapes a knife onto the roomba* no charge

Roomba: >:3

[broadwaytheanimatedseries]

I love it when tumblr posts become so legendary they just get referenced in other tumblr posts

[geocaprican]

It’s not just the jpegs we play with like dolls

[i-say-waa]

Waa!

[porcelain-face-art]

C A W

-NO CORVIDs detected-

But there might be a murder Roomba soon so

Mayby murder detected-?

[two-thirtyy]

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

Look buddy, i’m just trying to make it to Friday.

[taykoutmccleod]

reblog if its friday and you made it

[trixic-frankenman-deactivated20]

[porcelain-face-art]

Hell yeah buddy. It's Friday and I have a free day Tomorrow

And there ain't a corvid in this post

[crowthecleo-deactivated20251204]

now there is

[porcelain-face-art]

Nice👍

-crow Detected-

[porcelain-face-art]

i think i am going to try to train the local pigeons to flock to the baseball field whenever they hear that fuckass whistle once i move into my dorm

Yeeees.

So. What you need is:

A whistle

Seeds, and the agility to FLEE

How it's done:

1: lay a very sparse path into the stadium, and a even bigger pile inside the stadium, and keep blowing the whistle

2: once you start noticing birds eating the path seeds, remove the path, but keep putting them in the stadium, keep whistling

3: once the birds are in the stadium, only throw seeds, when birds are present and after whistling

4: during a game, get a seat and wait for them to whistle, with a bucket of popcorn.

And no, there's tooooootally no guarantee that this works because I would never do something this devious in my life, or anything.

And I didnt hate my football club for forcing me to be a goalkeeper because I am "large" while I'm a better striker. -cough-

-NO CORVIDs detected-

-yet-

-they shall also be present sooner or later-