Iâm posting here because I donât know where else to get all this frustration and pain out. In the last week, two people Iâve personally known and were close to have died. The world is a mess, there are attacks in my home country every other day, and itâs hard to focus on anything when I feel like Iâm being hit and hit and hit with tragedy.Â
My roommate texted me âthere is no godâ when she heard the news that our teacher was killed. He was so fun and amazing, and he was killed because someone hated his religion. They hated that he was Jewish, that he lived in Israel, that itâs our country. So they killed him.
My grandmother died and all I feel is fury and pain that sheâs gone.
Two different deaths but they hurt the same.
And just... Am I at that age? Is this what happens when you get into your 20s?Â
I just donât get it.
Iâm frustrated and hurting and exhausted.
Maybe death is a part of life. While it hurts that my grandma is gone, I understand that thatâs life.
But someone being killed isnât the way life is supposed to work.
And Iâm mad.Â
No, Iâm furious.
Iâll read articles about whatâs happening in Israel and feel blame in the words when they say that he was killed in âoccupied territoryâ. As if thatâs a justification for killing a man who only brought light and family and hope into the world. As if terrorism is the obvious result of being in your own home just because someone else doesnât think itâs yours.Â
As if your anger gives you the right to go hurt others, as if youâre a fucking spoiled child that believes if youâre hurting, everyone else should hurt too.
Guess what - your anger doesnât validate killing someone.
Your anger doesnât validate killing someone.Â
You want Palestine and your pain and hurt and frustration are valid BUT YOUR ANGER DOESNâT VALIDATE KILLING SOMEONE.
So Iâm furious. Iâm so furious, because Iâll be here as the next person is killed, and the next, and the next, and my fury will grow, and itâll keep happening, and the world will keep validating their anger and not mine.
Just - fuck everything.
