You were my obsessor turned platonic lover.
My greatest pursuer shaped into my trusted advisor.
Like watching glazed hungering eyes
Turned dazzling with clear adoration.
You were my greatest friend.
Enraptured by creativity, taken into its spell
We found solace in one another's desire
And beneath that purest agreement,
I carried your feelings, your emotion,
I carried everything you gave to me with eagerness.
In return for you helping me feel important.
You opened your hands and created magic,
A mirage of life cast out before me.
I felt the blooming flowers of care
A great meadow of our relationship
Warm and inviting, soft to the touch,
Difficult to separate from, with all the
Comfort and help that you gave to me.
You helped me realize that
You taught me to not harm others.
You showed me how to be patient.
You helped me maintain my dignity
In order to further this great
Pure agreement we had made.
I lavished in this meadow, selfishly
Basking in the rays of attention.
Watching the outside world drain away into nothingness
Everything outside of this
I abandoned thoughts of selflessness, charity empathy.
I was this meadow. I was the flowers.
I was the sky, and the sun.
But what you offered to me.
But the longer I lay in the sun, the hotter it sang against my skin
And the more I basked with the breeze, the harsher
It began to whip. And the more
I reflected on these strange, uncomfortable changes
The more malicious the surroundings became.
It began to hurt to remain here. And I reminisced on what
Things I had left behind.
But when I tried to stand, I was immobilized.
And I began to realize, that within
This meadow of lavender and honey
Thorns and weeds were entwining my legs.
Whispering sweet words of encouragement, adoration,
Carving your name into my flesh, grabbing desperately
Wrapping around my throat
The meadow turned dark into sludge,
The grass was oil and the sky was black
And I saw that your flowery appearance concealed
Dangerous and carnivorous.
And when I reached for you in the toiling darkness
You drew your hand away like the touch was acidic
And watched me writhe and gag in the depths
Dying there under your eyes I knew
I was not a person to you. I was
Our friendship encapsulated only by your love
Of what I can do for you.
You “helped” me realize that
My importance is a spectrum varied by how you feel that day.
You “taught” me to not inconvenience your fantasies.
You “showed” me how to hold my tongue about your behavior.
You “helped” me maintain my indifference with how you treated others.
In order to further this great
"Pure" agreement we had made.
The years I wasted in that meadow
That you built so craftily for me
Draining my life from my mouth and my eyes
And poisoning everything I held close to me.
But I was cut loose by the
Incredible, amazing people
Who had never stopped waiting for me
Why the fuck did you do this.
romaincrisis
ellievsbear
gamechangershow
andulkaphoto
turnnoffyourmind
yousharknotpass
