my duty is to my heart

美美

[princess-mei]

MEI 美美 QIN

“time / mystical time / cutting me open, then healing me fine / were there clues i didn't see? / and isn't it just so pretty to think / all along there was some / invisible string / tying you to me?”

Nicknames: Mei-Mei (friends and family) Pronouns: She/her Sexuality: Straight Magic status: Sorceress, love witch — out Nationality: American Ethnicity: Chinese Accent: American-California Height: 5’6 Build: Tall and strong, is a ballet dancer  Complexion: Fair-skinned Eye color: Brown  Hair color/length/style: Dark brown, wavy, midway down her back with fringe bangs, worn naturally or pulled up in a bun, usually decorated with a bow or headband Tattoos/piercings/daily jewelry: Tattoo of a red heart on the inside of her right wrist, normal ear piercings, no daily jewelry but definitely wears fun necklaces with certain outfits. 

Occupation: Love witch Relationship Status: Single What would you find if you Googled them?: Not much, social media accounts.  What natives would know about them: Works as a love witch. Dated Lock who died in December 2020.  Other: Moved to Swynlake in February 2018. Starred in the 2020 Swynlake Community Theatre Wicked show as Elphaba. Has extremely public beef with the Ashleys. Has two sisters. Family well known in American sorcery community. She can see people’s strings of fate.

biography ♥ character sheet ♥ instagram ♥ inspiration  ♥ what can a love witch do?

[princess-mei]

NAME: Mei Qin FC: Tong Liya AGE: 37 MAGIC STATUS: Sorceress -- love specialty OCCUPATION: Host of Love, Me(i) CURRENT LOCATION: Los Angeles, Calfornia RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Married to Andrew Smith CHILDREN: Lily Hua Qin (7) and Jin Lucius Qin (5)

BIOGRAPHY:

review of Love, Me(i) in the NYT

The sensational hit talk show “Love, Me(i)” is back for another season and the guest list is impressive. With celebrities like Taylor Swift and Timothee Chamalet on the schedule, we are bound to be in for another amazing season of advice, stories, and tears!

Mei Qin smashed TV records last year by shooting up to the most streamed reality/talk show within weeks of the premiere. The combination of wit, heartfelt bonding, and digging deep into people’s love lives has kept audiences enthralled. Honestly, my favorite segments are the ones with normal people. Of course, the celebrities are fascinating and she gives amazing interviews, but I think the audience really connects when she’s just talking to the average person with the same warmth and compassion.

I can’t wait for the next season and I encourage you to tune in, this is not your average celebrity gossip. Also, her line of love witch products (everything from luck charms to dildos!) are amazing.

[princess-mei]

There She Goes 💖 [Self para]

In which Mei embarks on her next journey...[takes place: July 10 and beyond]

[tw -- none]

“I can’t believe you got the window seat and all you’re gonna do is sleep on this flight.”

Mei blinked awake blearily and turned slightly in her seat, smiling at Lock and shrugging her shoulders as she shrugged and snuggled down again. Lock rolled his eyes at her and then leaned over her, popping open the visor on the window. The scent of his cologne drifted into her nose as he smushed her into the seat in order to peer out the window.

“Look at this, we’re in the clouds!” 

“Yeah,” Mei grumped, still sleepy. “That’s where planes go.” 

“Aw, c’mon, don’t you think it’s cool?” 

Mei sighed and opened her eyes again, looking at Lock’s crooked smile. The icy green-blue of his eyes, caught in the bright light reflecting in from the sky outside. He looked happy. Excited. They’d never really flown together before, but Mei knew how much Lock liked it. When he’d been younger, he wanted to be an astronaut. He’d told her that once. They had talked about going on so many trips.

Her hand reached up to curl her hand around his bicep where he was leaning on the armrest between them. He glanced over at her and then plopped back in his seat. Mei scoot over, Lock’s arm slipping over her shoulders as she rested her head against him. 

“Where are we going first?” 

“I don’t know yet,” Mei murmured, nuzzling into Lock’s side, her eyes slipping closed. “I’ll decide when we get there.” 

<3 <3 <3

When Mei woke up for the second time as the pilot announced their descent into Germany, she was alone.

She had been alone for several hours now. Ever since she’d left her sisters on the train platform in Swynlake. The tears she had cried had stopped a long time ago, but there was still this ache in her chest that she thought would be gone. It was only made worse by the fact the person sitting next to her on the plane was a woman with a shock of bright red hair and mole on her chin. Not Lock. 

Sighing, Mei leaned her head against the window and watched the plane descend through the clouds.

Upon landing, she turned her phone on. There were texts from Huey, whom she’d spent the night with last night in Cambridge before her flight this afternoon, Phineas, Vanessa (she’d gotten the date wrong for Mei leaving, not that Mei blamed her between the time difference and her internship and Candace), and her sisters. There wasn’t anything from her Mom. Her dad had wished her a safe flight. 

Mei chewed her lip as they taxied to the gate and she texted everyone back, telling them that she’d landed and that she would let them know when she was settled. There was still a long way to go. A taxi to the train station, another few hours on the train through the Ingarian countryside. 

In the airport terminal, Mei stood just outside her gate and glanced around--suddenly feeling small and lost. For the first time, she felt alone. No one in this country knew her. She was completely anonymous. They didn’t know her story or her name. What she was doing here. It was paralyzing, as if Mei had suddenly been erased, her whole life: blank. 

There was no one who would help her. 

“Fräulein, haben Sie sich verirrt?” a woman in an airport uniform smiled at her. She had a bright yellow string, like a sunflower, on her ring finger. It disappeared out towards the tarmac. 

Mei looked at it, then up at the woman. “What? Oh--” 

“Do you need something, miss?” The airline worker switched to English. 

“No. I-I’m fine. Sorry.” Mei smiled at her and then stepped out of the way. She stood for another moment, but this time, she was watching. All the people walking back and forth, strings connected to the people they were traveling with or out the windows, into the distance. There were thousands of stories here and none of them started at the airport. 

She found the sign with a little baggage icon on it and began to follow the arrow. It pointed her where she needed to go. As she walked, she felt her story continuing.

In customs, she had to fill out her temporary license and registration. This part had slipped her mind, but Hera had walked her through it. That didn’t make the piece of paper she was handed any less intimidating. She filled out all the regular information: her name, age, passport number, Magick status and specialization. It was only when she got towards the bottom that she hesitated, biting her lip. 

What is your intended progress? 

That was what she was here to discover, wasn’t it? She didn’t know how long she was going to stay. Or what she was going to do while she was here. Hopefully learn something, but also just--explore. Have fun. Try to shake off the shackles and spectres of Swynlake. 

She couldn’t exactly write all of that on a visa application. 

Mei sighed and scribbled something down about cultural experience and expanding her magic practices and then handed the form back to the man at the desk. 

“Excuse me,” she asked him. “How long do applications take to process?” 

“Three to five days.” 

“And--I can’t practice magic in that time?” 

“No,” grunted the man. 

“Not even privately?”

“Not even privately.” 

“Gotcha. Thanks.” 

The man grunted again and turned away. 

Mei twisted her fingers. No magic for several days. That would be so strange. No reagent collecting. No potion brewing. How odd. Mei used magic every day. She had known about the registration process and she still wasn’t sure how she felt about it. After all, they denied werewolves and vampires. Lock would not have been able to come. 

But Lock wasn’t here and Mei wanted something new. 

<3 <3 <3

Mei had decided to stay a night in the capital city, Kingsbury. It had been so long since she’d been to a nice, bustling town. Tomorrow, she was headed for Market Chipping, a town in the corner of the countryside. That was where Madame Zauberstab’s shoppe was, Hera’s master. The woman that she was supposed to be meeting. 

She had booked a room in a hotel and after dropping her bags, she headed back down onto the street. The hotel had suggested a few restaurants and nightclubs on the strip a few blocks down and Mei headed in that direction. The streets were full of people, even in the dusky night hours, the sky bleeding pinks and purples. Mei had expected magic around every corner, but that didn’t seem to be the case. Unless you counted the clothing, which was beautiful. It reminded her of the capes Howl used to wear about town. It made her wonder why they had ever left this place, she thought it was so beautiful!

Although she was sure that she’d find people her age in the night clubs, she instead grabbed a kabob from a street vendor and wandered towards the park. Here there were trees and plants that she did not recognize. Some were strange colors. One tree had a red trunk and bright yellow leaves that swayed without wind. Another had a gnarled, black trunk with no leaves at all. It twisted in an awful way that made Mei uncomfortable if she looked at it too long.

It was a white flower, glowing softly and curled in on itself as if it had not yet bloomed, that caught her attention. She wandered towards it, head tilted curiously. 

“I wouldn’t touch that if I were you,” someone said from nearby.

Mei jumped and spun. 

The person who had spoken was sitting on a bench, one arm draped over the back of it. Another, tall and lanky person was leaning casually over the back of it. In the shadow of the evening, Mei could only just make out the first person’s eyes flashing towards her. The second person--she could see their teeth, where they laughed, a deep, throaty laugh.

“Why not?” she asked, standing up straight and curling her hand at her side. She was glad that it was dark, so that she didn’t blush. 

“Those are moonbloom flowers,” the first person, who had a soft, lilting voice said.

“Moonbloom?” 

“Mhm. Every part of it is poisonous. When it unfurls at night, it releases toxic spores into the air that make you hallucinate.”

“Oh.” Mei glanced at the flower and then took a step away, closer towards the pair on the bench. 

“You must be new around here,” the second person observed.

Mei nodded. “Just got in today.” At least she was used to being the new girl, even though it had been a while now.  She smiled. “My name is Mei Qin.” 

“Zandy,” the second person introduced themselves. “They/them. And this is Seke. They/them.” 

Seke threw up a peace sign and took a drag from the cigarette they had in their mouth. Mei hadn’t seen it before, but now the scent of burning reached her nose as the smoke drifted towards her. It didn’t smell like any cigarette or joint she’d ever had. When Seke blew out, the smoke was in the shape of a dog. It bounded through the open sky and disappeared.

“Oh! That was lovely,” Mei complimented. “Is the smoke charmed?” 

“Nah, I did that.” 

“Can you manipulate smoke?” 

“I just did.”

Mei flushed. “I meant--is that your Gift?” 

“Nah. I’m a telekinetic sorcerer.” 

“And you’re allowed to charm your smoke like that?” 

“Nah,” Seke said again and chuckled. “That’s not legal and neither is this.” They wiggled the joint. 

“W-well, then--should you be doing that?”

Seke laughed.

“Don’t be a dick,” Zandy finally said, smiling at Mei. They had a very charming smile. It didn’t fully put Mei at ease, but she would much rather be looking at them. “Don’t worry. This park isn’t that heavily patrolled, that’s why we come out here. You’re fine.” 

“Are you a sorcerer too?” 

“Illusion specialty. That helps with the drugs too. What about you?” 

“Love magic,” Mei said proudly, without even thinking about it.

“Ha. No wonder she’s boring,” Seke said, idly flicking ash off their joint so the red tip would burn a little brighter. 

Mei’s whole face flushed. “Love magic is not boring. And neither am I!” Though, maybe she had become boring. Just a little bit. She didn’t drink as much as she used to. And she didn’t like clubs. And she wanted to take her training seriously, which had meant not--doing stupid things. Not getting in trouble. 

“Sure thing, Cupid.” 

They were resorting to name calling? Mei’s shoulders scrunched around her ears. She knew Hera had warned her about elitism but--this was just…plain mean. Her jaw set. 

“You are a stuck up prick,” Mei declared decisively. 

Zandy snorted, but didn’t come to their friend’s defense or Mei’s. 

“It’s no wonder you don’t have any strings and I hope you never do.” Mei spun on her heel and stormed off before Seke could see that she had been crying.

“What does that mean?” she heard Seke say. “Hey! What does that mean?!” 

Mei just kept walking. Maybe this had been a mistake. 

<3 <3 <3 

The train station at Kingsbury was extraordinarily grand. It had a beautiful archways, dark wood, and lovely paneled glass that allowed light to filter in. Mei wanted to reach out and catch the sun beams between her fingers, but she knew she couldn’t. She didn’t want to get kicked out of the country in her first forty eight hours. 

She moved with her luggage towards the loading platform and watched in delight as telekinetic sorcerers directed the baggage into the different cars, effortlessly sorting them like some giant jigsaw puzzle. It was the first time since coming to Ingary that she had seen magic used so casually. 

Once settled on the train, Mei had intended to do some reading--or catch up on her Instagram--but instead, she found herself enchanted by the views outside the window. Crystal clear lakes. Green hills full of beautiful wildflowers. She had thought the train would be moving too quickly to see anything properly, but it rolled sluggish and lazy through the landscape, pulling Mei along. 

<3 <3 <3 

Last night, as she had laid in her hotel room, all alone, and cried--she had thought about going back. She wanted to call Jie Jie and tell her to book a flight, but instead, she called her father. She didn’t know what time it would be. Noon, sometime, maybe. He answered on the second ring.

“Is everything alright, Mei-Mei?” 

“No,” Mei sniffled. “I want to go home.” 

There was a pause for a moment. And then she heard the sound of tea splashing into a cup. Mei could close her eyes and imagine it: Baba in the kitchen with the old, clay tea pot, pouring into his favorite mug. She wanted to be able to smell it. To feel the steam on her face. She had made that exact cup of tea for her Baba a hundred times.

“No, you don’t,” he told her calmly.

“You don’t know,” Mei shot back at once, huffy and upset, her lip trembling.

“Yes, I do. This is what you have always wanted, isn’t it? To run as far as you could, just to see how far it was. You never sat still. Not for a day in your life. Even when you were very young.” 

Mei kept her eyes closed, listening to her dad’s voice, wishing he was sitting next to her. One of her feet overlapped the other from where she sat on the bed. She suddenly felt very young. Too young to be in a strange, foreign country all alone. 

“This will be good for you, Mei. I know it will. I promise. Just--get some sleep. It is getting late there, isn’t it?” 

Mei chuckled a little and looked at the clock, it was only about ten. “Maybe for old people.” 

“Mm. You will be one, one day too.” 

“Gross.” 

“Goodnight, sweetheart. I am happy to called me.” 

“Yeah. Okay.” Mei wanted to say more. She wanted to ask him to leave the phone on, so she could listen to the sound of tea being poured and fall asleep to it. “Goodnight, Baba.” 

<3 <3 <3 

The sun was shining bright when Mei stopped off the train station. It was not as glamorous as Kingsbury, but there was a polite quaintness to it that reminded her of Swynlake. 

Except here, there was no one waiting for her at the train station. 

She stepped onto the street and wondered if she should call a cab, but her luggage’s levitating charm hadn’t worn off quite yet and Mei wanted to get to know this new little town. As she walked, she wondered if she would drink coffee at the coffeeshop she spotted. Or if the bookshoppe she passed was haunted. 

Mei imagined a younger version of Hera walking these streets. She wondered what her mistress had thought of all the little shops. Mei wondered what she, herself, thought of them. There would be plenty of time to decide, she supposed.

Everything was much quieter here than in the city. She passed one or two people on the street, they were friendly, smiling and tipping their hats at her. She smiled back and felt her heart lift a little. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. 

She turned on the street that was supposed to have Madame Zauberstab’s shoppe— 

Only to be confronted by a small CLOSED sign in the front window. 

Mei stood on the doorstep, reading it over and over, as if it was going to somehow change if she stared at it long enough. She hadn’t made another plan. If Madame Zauberstab wasn’t home…or her practice was closed…what was she supposed to do? 

Maybe she could knock anyway? Madame Zauberstab could be home just not accepting clients. And Mei wasn’t a client. She was a—er, acquaintance? Mutual…practicioner? 

“What do you want?” The knocker, which was in the shape of lion, twisted to life. 

Mei jumped. 

“Can’t you read?” 

“Uhm—hi! I’m Mei Qin, former apprentice of Mistress Cheralynne Alexander!” Mei smiled, wide and friendly, even if her hand felt sweaty on the handle of her suitcase. When nothing happened after several seconds, she glanced at the door knocker. “Uhm, she gave me your address and said she’d be…writing to you.” 

The door knocker didn’t say anything else, its mouth frozen once again in a snarl. 

Hera had said that Madame Zauberstab was—prickly. And that Mei would have to prove herself, but she didn’t realize getting across the threshold would be a problem. She wasn’t sure what to do. Mei lingered on the stoop for a bit longer, before feeling silly. She wouldn’t knock. Even though Mei had pushed back against her family the last few years, she’d grown up being deferential to her elders. 

So, Mei left. She wandered town until she came across a cute bed and breakfast with a lopsided roof that made it look as if it was smiling. She got a room and put her stuff down in it. She thought about calling Hera but Mei didn’t want to give up quite so early. 

<3 <3 <3

“Back again, little witch?” the door knock asked.

“Yup!” Mei chirped with a smile. It was the next day and Mei thought it wouldn’t hurt to come by again. The witch could’ve just been out yesterday. The charm on the door maybe took messages. Or maybe it was only to warn off unwanted visitors. She hadn’t actually been talking to the witch herself. “Is Madame Zauberstab in?”

“No.” 

Mei wanted to believe that. 

<3 <3 <3

“Is Madame Zauberstab in?”

“No.” 

<3 <3 <3

By the third day, Mei needed a new approach, clearly. She had taken to wandering the town during the day and she got the feeling they didn’t get many visitors. Everywhere she went, everyone greeted her. They were friendly. Only some upturned their nose at her being a witch. There was a little spot that served delicious soups and sandwiches, run by a fairy whom Mei had taken a liking to. 

“Hello, Lily,” Mei sighed as she trudged into the shoppe. 

“Hey, Mei. What’s the matter, sunshine?” 

“What do you know about Madame Zauberstab?” 

“Oh, she’s brilliant.” Lily lit up at once. 

“What?”

“Yeah, she helped me adjust when I had to leave my hollow.” 

“Oh.” Mei felt a deep, sinking sense of despair. Maybe Madame Zauberstab just hated her. “She’s why I’m here,” Mei explained as she slid into one of the stools at the sandwich bar. “I haven’t been able to get an appointment with her, though.” 

“Really? That’s strange. She is always home whenever I stop by.” 

“Great.” Mei pressed her face against the cool countertop and groaned.

<3 <3 <3

The next day, Mei marched up the steps. “I know you’re home!” she shouted and banged on the door, ignoring the knocker completely. “Please, I just want to learn. I came all the way here. I know there is still so much I can be taught! I am ready! I know I am and I’m not gonna leave until you open this door! I will come back tomorrow and the day after and the day after tha--”

“Stop your ruckus, child,” chastised the woman at the door when she opened it. Her skin was tan, her hair was in two long, gray braids. She was looking down her nose at Mei through half-moon glasses. Her fingers were full of rings and she was wearing an embroidered shawl over her shoulders.

For a moment, Mei just stared. Then, she remembered herself and she clasped her hands to her chest and bowed slightly. “Madame Zauberstab, I--”

“Want to be taught? Yeah, I got that.” 

Mei straightened up. Her cheeks were slightly flushed. “I would like to continue my education, yes.” 

“There was a woman who came here yesterday. Her husband has just died and she can’t stop weeping, she just wants to stop crying at everything. Make me a potion that you would give her.” The door slammed in Mei’s face.

<3 <3 <3 

Mei had her cauldron and some of the rarer ingredients that she’d had in Swynlake, but she didn’t have everything she needed, which meant she had gone on the hunt. It had taken her two days to find the ingredients she’d needed. At the herb shoppe, she’d found the rosemary and mint. She could have bought reagents at well, because there was a shoppe for that here (!!) but Mei didn’t want Madame Zauberstab to think she was lazy, so she’d hit the pavement. She gathered some Tears from a little kid who’d fallen and scraped his knee at the park. It was in the evening, strolling past a young couple pushing a pram that she’d managed to catch a feeling of Love. (A surprisingly tricky reagent, considering love was a state of being. Catching the essence of it, when someone was thinking about it, was difficult and rare.) 

The Bittersweet Goodbyes she needed, she found at the train station, where she’d sat and watched the trains come and go and wondered if this was even worth it or if she should get on the next train. Go somewhere else. Go home. 

She brewed the pearlescent potion and brought it to Madame Zauberstab as the sun was setting golden and pink in the sky. 

This time, she didn’t even knock. The door opened as she stepped onto the porch. 

“Let me see.” Madame Zauberstab held out her hand.

Mei placed the vial in her palm. 

The sorceress rolled it between her fingers. “This isn’t what I asked for.”

“Well, it isn’t ready. It needs a memory from the person first.”

“I know. I didn’t asked for a Heart Lifting potion.” 

“You asked for something to stop your client from crying. I always found this worked better than a No Tears brew. It lets you feel the sadness, just a little bit at a time. It takes the bitter edge off the bittersweetness of a life well lived and now over. I don’t know your client, but I do know from experience that tears need to be shed after someone has died. There is no helping that. It is just part of the process and I stand by that assessment. No Tears potions have their space, but not with grief.” Mei raised her chin. 

“Hm.” Madame Zauberstab’s hand closed around the vial. “I see Mistress Alexander taught you well.” 

Mei felt her own heart lift and the disciplined, determined tilt of her chin breaking as she smiled. 

“Don’t look so excited. Be here tomorrow: 8:00am sharp, so I can see what you can really do.” 

“Yes, ma’am. Thank you. I won’t disappoint you.” 

“We will see about that.” The door slammed again.

This time, Mei was still smiling as she jamboled down the steps and walked through the garden and down the familiar-unfamiliar street. Everything was new. Everything was different. This path would be one she’d walk a hundred times, but as it was, this was only the first few times. There were still new things to see: this path now painted in the deep mauve of dusk, drawing out the warmth from the stones. This town Mei would learn but right now--it was still a stranger to her. She hoped that she would make friends with it. Her and Swynlake had never really been friends. Swynlake had been a teacher. And a harsh one at that. Mei could appreciate it now, underneath a different sky, with endless opportunities rolling themselves out in front of her, melting all the way into the distant horizon skyline. 

As long as she followed her heart, she knew that she would find the right path…

[princess-mei]

♥ 100 likes

meitheforcebewithyou: happy 20th birthday to me! my last night in swynlake was made so special by all my friends and family, here and not here. i thank you all for the last four years. i wouldn’t be the person, or witch, i am today without them. on to the next adventure! 💖💖💖 don’t miss me too much! 😘

[eliamatrell]

They were the most moving sight there, two young people in love dancing together, blind to each other’s defects, deaf to the warnings of fate, deluding themselves that the whole course of their lives would be as smooth as the ballroom floor, unknowing actors made to play the parts of Juliet and Romeo by a director who had concealed the fact that tomb and poison were already in the script. Neither of them was good, each full of self-interest, swollen with secret aims; yet there was something sweet and touching about them both; those murky but ingenuous ambitions of theirs were obliterated by the words of jesting tenderness he was murmuring in her ear, by the scent of her hair, by the mutual clasp of those bodies of theirs destined to die.

GIUSEPPE DI LAMPEDUSA, from The Leopard, trans. Archibald Colquhoun. (via eliamatrell)

[nooowestayandgetcaught]

[resqectable]

“You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart.”

— Louise Erdrich (via perfeqt)

[ydotome]

Princess Mei (小梅公主) - Mulan II - February 1, 2005

[memoryslandscape-deactivated202]

“I am not a fool. I have just loved with an honest heart.”

— Mukta Singh-Zocchi, from The Thugs & a Courtesan (Srishti, 2014)

[thewinedarksea]

aes: long distance soulmates

my heart’s wrapped round

by a string

pulled taut, stretched cross 

the ocean.

[princess-mei]

Can I Handle the Seasons of My Life? 💖 [The Charmed Ones]

In which Ting-Ting and Su accompany Mei to the train station...[takes place: July 9, 2022]

@princess-ting-ting, @princess-su

[tw -- saying goodbyes :)]

MEI: “Has anyone seen my phone?!” Mei asked, calling down from the second floor landing. 

In her hand was one of her bags. The house was a flurry of activity. Her flight was in London tonight at midnight, but she needed to catch the train out of Swynlake in about fifteen minutes. 

The sun was just beginning to set on her last day in Swynlake. She had procrastinated packing, of course, and had spent most of the day doing so as a revolving door of friends came and left to wish her goodbye and good luck. Ting-Ting and MuHou had been on her about packing, but she kept getting distracted! She had walked the floors of this house a thousand times at this point, it felt like. Drifting in and out of rooms, looking around it and trying to gather all the pieces of her life that were scattered about. Her favorite mug from the cupboard, her favorite blanket from the back of the couch…

All of her bedroom.

Well, not all of it. Her bed was staying. Some of the posters on the wall. Her vanity. The fuzzy pink rug which was extremely comfy to lay on. This would still be her room. Just as she was sure she still had a room in San Francisco at her parents’ house. These pieces of her left like time capsules of the people she had been.  She wondered who she would be in Ingary…

“Seriously, I can’t find it anywhere! Someone call it!” 

TING-TING: Mei was packing. 

Mei was packing, because she was leaving.

Mei was leaving, because she was 20 years old now, and she’d fully Emerged as a sorceress, and she was starting her own life.

And Ting was happy for her. Of course she was. She was so happy her heart swelled so much that it squeezed against her ribcage and then shattered into dozens of little pieces. She’d collect them, later. After Mei left and she went upstairs to clean up her room and closed the door for the last time. 

Not the last time. That was silly. Mei would be back. Mei would visit — probably frequently and without much warning. And then the three of them would have movie nights and Key would rest her head in Mei’s lap and it would be like nothing changed.

Except, it wouldn’t be. Because everything would change.

Ting-Ting was trying not to think about that, though, because there was packing to be done and a phone to find.

“I’m calling it!” she shouted up the stairs, pulling up Mei’s number on her phone. She heard the faint sound of buzzing and stuck her head out of her bedroom, and waved to Su, who was in the living room. 

“Su — I think it’s on the couch? In the couch?” 

SU: Even though Su wasn’t the one leaving she still felt the Travel Anxiety™ kicking in as she watched Mei’s stuff disappear around the house. And maybe she was a little more worried than she usually would have been for this sort of thing since the last time one of them had left for a trip another had been kidnapped! And said kidnapped sister was going off on her own to a whole new place with no one there to help her. 

That wasn’t going to happen this time, though. This time Mei was going to leave and she was going to find a new place to settle and all would be well. All except for how much Su was going to miss her sister.

She was in the kitchen, prepping Mei a snack for the train ride because she felt rather useless otherwise, when Mei yelled down about her phone. Su pulled out hers, ready to call it, but Ting had beat her to the punch. In preparation, she moved to the living room to try and listen for it. 

She leaned over the couch at Ting’s instruction, plunging her hand into the depths of the sofa and felt around. 

“Got it!” Su grinned, hoisting it above her head from its hiding spot. She went to stand under the stairs to show it to Mei from down below. 

MEI: “Oh, good!” Mei said, letting out a breath. 

The door to her room clicked shut, the little paper sign covered in pink hearts and swirling cursive “Mei’s Room” that she had made when she was sixteen fluttered like it had every other time she’d ever closed her door. Slamming it when she was upset with Ting-Ting. Slowly turning the latch when she had a boy in her room. Creaking it gently when she was sneaking out. Every time, the paper fluttered. It fluttered now too. Mei looked at it for a moment--felt her heart clench--and then she turned away.

Picking up her suitcase, she lugged it down the stairs, plucking her phone from Su’s hand as she passed her. Ting-Ting came around the bannister and then it was just the three girls--three sisters--three witches--standing in the living room in a circle, looking at one another. 

Mei didn’t have anything else to pack. Her sisters would be sending Princess along for her after she got settled somewhere. She only needed the one suitcase. It was charmed to carry everything she needed, which wasn’t much. Her grimoire, her makeup, her clothes, some creature comforts (her stuffed animals), her signed cauldron. She wanted to travel light. So that nothing held her back. So there was an excuse to leave things in this little house that she’d lived in for four years. As if she could leave her imprint here and never be too far away.

After a pause, Mei put her phone in her pocket and grabbed her purse from where it was hanging off the banister. 

“Well--that is everything,” Mei said. She didn’t know what else to say. Her heart was beating fast, but she felt strangely calm. 

TING-TING: “You know we could come with you to the airport,” said Ting, offering again. “We could make a little day trip out of it — not too late, you know?”

She knew what the answer would be. She knew that stepping on that train alone was a step that Mei needed to take on her own. She knew that if she and Su tagged along, it would defeat the purpose of this journey. They’d go with her to the train station, certainly, and then watch her get on the train and wave to her as it chugged away from the station. 

And then, Ting would put her arm around Su’s shoulders and Su would lean into her, and they would pretend they could still see Mei waving from the distance.

This was all stuff that hadn’t happened yet, but Ting-Ting could not stop thinking about it. She hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it all night, wondering how she would be able to stay strong and steady as she watched her little sister drift away. 

She reached for Mei’s hand now, and then Su’s too, holding them tight. One last moment with the three of them living under the same roof. 

She would not hold on for too much longer.

Ting-Ting gave each of their hands a squeeze and then dropped their fingers.

“Well, I guess we can head on over to the train station now,” she said, as cheerfully as she could. “We’re early enough so we can grab something from Hatter’s maybe.”

SU: As Mei came down the stairs Su felt a little stupid for not dragging out the whole lost phone thing. Why couldn’t she have let it stay in the sofa for another few minutes? Or have found it and put it somewhere else? Give them more time? Maybe too much time! Maybe make Mei late for her flight, so late that she wouldn’t go for another day. Another week. Another month.

But that was stupid. She couldn’t have hid the phone forever, and she didn’t want to make her sister any more anxious than she needed to be for her flight. Because she was getting on that flight. There were a million ways Su could have made her stay, but it wouldn’t be right.

Ting-Ting took their hands and like some sort of reflex Su reached for Mei’s other one, completing the triangle between them for that brief moment before Mei was announcing that she had everything. That she was ready to go. Su opened her mouth, wanting to say it wasn’t everything! She had a snack prepped for her in the kitchen!

Only then Ting-Ting suggested they could get something on their way and Su closed her mouth because if they went to Hatter’s that would mean more time together. It was a longer trip to go there then it was for Su to go to the kitchen. So she didn’t say anything, just in case, only smiled and turned to Mei, seeing what she wanted to do.

MEI: “Yeah, sure, Hatter’s sounds good.” 

Their hands dropped and she shifted her bag on her shoulder, feeling awkward all of the sudden. 

“You’ll be fine,” assured MuHou, who had come up next to them and grabbed Mei’s hand, giving it a little squeeze. Mei dropped down onto her knee to squeeze the familiar in a hug. 

“Thanks, MuHou.”

“Be a good girl,” MuHou said when Mei pulled away and stood. 

“I always am!” Mei chirped, winking at her and giving her a finger gun. 

MuHou just hummed a bit.

Right, time to go now. Mei had the urge to look back at the stairs. She felt a shiver run up her spine, like a breeze had appeared. She looked over her shoulder and in her mind’s eye, she could see Lock, standing there at the bottom of them, his head tilted back, looking to the second floor, a younger—different—version of herself appeared, ran down into his arms. As soon as the apparitions collided, they disappeared. 

Mei hoped they stayed here. Stayed happy. 

They were also the reason Mei had to leave. She took a deep breath and didn’t look back again as she led the way out of the house. 

The sisters talked as they walked, Mei’s suitcase rumbling on the sidewalk behind her. She looked towards Swynlake Secondary, hidden behind the primary, but just visible in the distance. She looked at the bookstore, Town Hall, the garden. They stopped at Hatter’s and Mei remembered pushing all the tables together and laughing with her friends. She remembered dances and late nights with cups of cocoa. They sat at her favorite table with the high backed couch, all three of them squished onto it, Mei in the middle. They talked and they laughed and then it was time to go. 

The train platform was quiet. There was no fanfare. This was just a normal, sleepy Saturday in Swynlake. They stood there, waiting for the train to appear in the distance. Mei’s heart was beating fast and she kept rising onto her toes, as if she was going to start sprinting down the platform. 

She checked her phone. “Huey says he’s gonna leave soon to pick me up in London,” Mei announced. She was staying with him overnight in Cambridge, until her flight the next day. “So, uh, that’s all set.”

TING-TING: And just like that, it was over. 

Their little stop for tea, yes, but also Mei’s time in Swynlake, this chapter of their life that had lasted for almost four years. Their time as three sisters, three Qin girls living under the same roof. 

Oh, sure, maybe it should’ve ended earlier, back when Ting-Ting went to college, and even after she moved back. She could’ve moved out, got her own place just around the corner or something. But she didn’t. She didn’t, because Mei and Su still needed her. And they still needed her when they moved to Swynlake.

And now they didn’t. Not in the same way. Ting-Ting was so proud of them. 

“Good, good,” said Ting-Ting, because talking about concrete plans was easier than saying goodbye. “Make sure you text us when you get there, okay? And if you need me to Venmo you two for dinner, just let me know. You should get something nice since you’re gonna be traveling so much.”

She looked at Mei now, tilting her head a little. Mei stood up straight, so sure of herself, even though Ting could see reagents fluttering anxiously around her. But Ting knew she would be fine. Mei had once been stubborn and impulsive — heck, she was still stubborn and impulsive, but she’d also grown to be confident, capable, and compassionate.

Ting reached to touch her little sister’s cheek, brushing a piece of her hair behind her ear. 

“You’re going to do so great, Mei-mei,” she said. And then she looked at Su, her heart so full she thought she might start crying right now. “I’m so proud of you. Of both of you. Remember to call us, okay?” Her throat closed up a little. She swallowed and started to blink very quickly, in order to stave off any encroaching tears.  “You better tell us about all the cute boys you meet.” 

SU: For the first time in a very long time, Su tried not to think of what would come next. As they stood in line to order she had looked at her sisters and thought that she could enjoy this time they had together for what it was or she could spend it dreading when it ended, glancing at her phone to catch the time every 5 or so minutes, until she looked up and missed it.

When they sat down, she had her phone tucked up in her pocket and did not look at it once. Only at her sisters and, occasionally, at the door when someone would walk in. She didn’t let herself realize the time until they were stood at the train station, with nothing left to do but wait.

Su didn’t want to make this a big deal! She didn’t want to start crying or getting sappy because, like she kept telling herself, just because Mei was gone didn’t mean it was for forever, that they would never see one another again. It would be hard, sure, but it wasn’t the end. Just an end. So there was no need for a grand sweeping speech or pull a big stunt because while Mei taking these steps for herself was an achievement, her leaving them was not something that Su wanted to emphasize. She wasn’t leaving them fully, how could she? They were sisters. They would be together, in some shape and form, forever. No matter how far or how angry or how much time had passed, they always would be.

Then Ting-Ting had to go and make her very precariously set up wall crumble in a pile at her feet. She tried looking away, getting frustrated with her emotions for being so loud without her permission, but it was useless. What was done was done and Su was watery eyed.

And, well, since she’d already screwed that part up she figured it was too late to play it cool anyway. Su surged forward to wrap Mei in a hug, squeezing for a moment until she relaxed again, just holding her sister close until they saw one another again.

“Good luck!” she said, then pulled away smiling to stand beside Ting-Ting. “Not that you’ll need it.”

MEI: Mei nodded at all Ting-Ting’s advice and she was remembering Rome. Packing for Rome. Leaving for Rome. Ting-Ting had dropped her off at the school and said all these very similar things and Mei had rolled her eyes and glanced impatiently over her shoulder, looking for her friends, feeling embarrassed. She’d barely hugged her sister goodbye before flouncing off into the crowd of teenagers. 

Now, she listened patiently, because she knew this was how Ting-Ting cared. She cared meticulously and wholly. And she wanted Mei to be safe. Mei took her words and held them close to her heart, knowing this would be the last lecture like this that she would get for a long time. 

She felt the tears in her throat. She had told herself she wouldn’t cry. Or, at least, she’d wait until she was on the train. 

The hug from Su didn’t surprise her either. She was grateful for it. Mei squeezed her little sister back, pressing a kiss to her hair and trying not to cry. She had never been a nagging older sister like Ting-Ting (love you Ting!), but she suddenly felt the urge. 

“Thanks,” she said when Su pulled away, since she didn’t know what else to say. She was not good at nagging. “You can always change your mind about things. Don’t let anyone else tell you how to live your life,” she told Su, squeezing her hand and then looked at Ting-Ting. 

“I’ll tell you about all the cut boys, but you gotta make some moves on your cute boy.” She put her hands on her hips and then sighed and drew Ting-Ting into a hug. “Thanks for everything, Jie-jie.” She murmured this soft enough for only her to hear. 

Mei leaned back just enough to grab Su by the arm and pull her into the hug too, squeezing them both tightly. 

The train horn sounded in the distance, announcing its arrival. Mei squeezed her sisters just a little tighter. 

“Well—this is it!“

TING-TING: This was it indeed. 

Ting was crying now, because it was silly to pretend that she wasn’t. She wrapped her arms around her little sisters and held them both close. One last time. One last time before everything changed.

She couldn’t stop it. She couldn’t hold them too tight. All she could do was hope that she’d taught them well enough that they would be fine without her. All she could do was hope that she’d love them well enough that they would come back. 

The train rumbled into the station and Ting squeezed her eyes shut, knowing that this moment would pass all too quickly, but hoping nonetheless that it would last forever.

It didn’t. 

She let go of Mei, brushing her cheek once more, and then nodded towards the train.

“You better get on so you can get a good seat by the window,” she said. And then she looped an arm around Su’s shoulder. “We’ll wave at you till we can’t anymore.”

Ting leaned a bit on Su, pulling her closer. Part of it was because she knew Su was crying and she wanted Su to have someone to lean on. But part of it was also — well, Ting needed someone too.

SU: Su gave a little nod at Mei’s advice because she knew it was true, Mei had proved that much. She had forged her own path and Su would only be so lucky as to be as brave as both her older sisters to do the same for herself.

She allowed herself to be pulled back into another hug, content in her sisters’ arms despite what she knew was to come next. Letting Mei go from that last felt like the hardest thing Su’d ever had to do, and yet the act of it was so easy.

“Love you,” she blubbered, knowing she was being very unhelpful but unable to stop herself either. She was upset! She was devastated! She was beyond happy! And, really, what could she expect? Only her sisters had been able to make her feel so many emotions all at one time and in such an intense way.

Her arm came around Ting-Ting’s middle, stepping closer until their sides were pressed up against one another because it was true, Su needed something to keep her there. She glanced up at their oldest sister for a moment before resting her head against her shoulder to watch Mei board, free hand waving, as promised.

“She’ll be fine,” she said, for both their sakes. Su sighed, getting out the wobbly emotions. “Let’s just hope she didn’t forget anything.”

MEI: This was it.

Mei just had to take a step back, then another, turn--and board the train. Her feet felt stuck to the platform. The train breezed passed, rustling the strands of her hair wildly around her face. She needed to move. 

Hey, what are you waiting for? That was Lock’s voice in her head. It was so clear, she almost jumped. Her eyes closed briefly and she took a deep breath. The made-up Lock voice in her head was right: what was she waiting for? Everything she wanted was on that train--was out over the horizon. She wasn’t going to get what she needed from Swynlake anymore. 

Mei didn't need anyone but herself and maybe that sounded selfish, or bad, but Mei didn't see it that way. She had been given that freedom and she had embraced it. Ting-Ting had helped her realize that she could do this by herself. That she didn't need anyone, but that didn't mean she didn't care and that she wouldn't miss them or want to be with them. The part that wanted to stay was the sister. The rest of her was telling her to go.

This had always been the plan: to get out of Swynlake. Ever since she’d first step foot in this town, she had been waiting to leave it again. 

There was no reason to hesitate. Not even her sisters’ tears. 

“Okay! Love you!” She smiled brightly, to reassure them. To push her own tears back. “I’ll see you both soon, I promise!” Mei forced herself to turn and make her way to the door, stepping on. She hurried into a window seat, throwing her stuff and skinning her knee as she pressed herself against the window, waving to Ting-Ting and Su as the bell chimed, signaling the closing of the doors. She waved as the train lurched and started to move down the tracks. Until she couldn’t see Ting-Ting or Su anymore.

And then, Mei turned and sat down properly in her seat. She glanced around at the strangers on the train with her. None of them paid her any mind, except for one elderly woman who smiled at her. Mei smiled back and took a breath. It suddenly felt as if a weight had been lifted off of her chest and, much to her surprise, she didn’t cry. 

She sat in her seat, watching the English countryside pass her by and felt her heart accelerating, as if it was a bird taking off in flight…

[princess-mei]

We Had a Good Run 💖 [Phei]

oh-phineas​:

Phineas saw the tears in Mei’s eyes and he knew– because, yeah, maybe he’d misinterpreted a lot of signals when he first met her, but it was like he said. He didn’t make the same mistakes twice. There was no mistaking it now. Mei was smiling, but… this was a goodbye, in a way. Sure, they were going to see each other again, Mei wasn’t going to walk off into the sunset just yet. But this– this kind of picnic table-side conversation, where they talked about everything and nothing and important shit and unimportant shit and their dreams and their fears and they fought and forgave each other and fought again– well, Phineas was getting the distinct sense that this was the end of something.

And of course it wasn’t really the end. Their friendship had survived worse things than a couple thousand miles. But Phineas didn’t like change, even for all of the preaching he did about adventure and making life interesting and not wanting to do the same thing every day. He was attached to the easy rhythm their friendship had fallen into, two years later. And now he was tearing up too.

“Pinkie promise, then,” he said, and his voice cracked a little, and he hooked his pinkie in Mei’s. He opened his mouth to crack another stupid joke, but then he changed his mind. And for once, Phineas Flynn was quiet for a while, trainers swinging under the branch, the faint sound of singing and shouting floating out of one of the nearby windows, leaves rustling in the breeze. 

It was only really when he slowed down like this that he really thought about it. How much it all meant. To have someone who knew everything about you, all your worst parts, all your cheesiest jokes, all your biggest mistakes, all your insecurities and fears and secret vanities, and liked you anyway. Loved you, even. Not in the way Phineas had once imagined. But this was so much better.

“I should, uh, probably get to rehearsal soon,” Phineas finally said, dipping his head a little and scratching at the back of his neck. He looked up and met Mei’s eyes, with a small, watery smile. “But, uh… thanks. For this. For everything.”

Their pinkies entwined and Mei folded hers down, locking Phineas’ in place. She didn’t want to let go. The touch lingered for a moment, because she felt it too. The goodbye.

Mei wasn’t good at goodbyes naturally, but she’d gotten that way after the last few years. There was Lock, of course, but also Vee and Huey who had moved away. And now it was her turn to leave. She found this harder. When someone left you, you had no control over it. You could be upset with them. With their decision to leave you behind. (Even if it wasn’t, really, their decision.) But when you were the one who left, it didn’t feel like you could miss people, because--

You left. You pulled all over your roots out of the ground and blew down the road like a tumbleweed. Mei felt unmoored that way as she let go of Phineas’ finger, like she had pulled out the roots that entangled with his--sharing the nurturing soil of Swynlake. 

That was just growing up too.

“Yeah, thanks for everything too,” she told him with a smile. “Tell Mr. Simba and everyone that I said hey and to break a leg.”

Maybe I’ll come back for the show. Her sisters were in it anyway but...she probably shouldn’t say that. She didn’t want to start out this journey by breaking promises. Mei had no idea where she was going to go from here, so it was best not to get anyone’s hopes up.

“I should get home, get back to packing...”

Mei wasn’t going to do that, at least, not right away. She figured she would take the long way around. Visit all the places she’d miss, allow herself to feel a little nostalgic, before taking that next step.

[princess-mei]

Some of My Favorite Things 💖 [Mei Su Soup]

princess-su​:

–

Su had not been fishing for such a compliment. Those sorts of things didn’t really cross her mind, she thought she had just been stating the obvious, and was a little bit surprised to hear her sister take up such a torch for her. Upon reflection, maybe she had been a little hard on herself but that was the trend of how things were going for her lately.

Sometimes she thought her sisters would gas her up just to be nice. Because that’s what they were supposed to do. This didn’t feel like one of those moments. When it came to clothes they were pretty good about noticing when Su was uncomfortable. Mostly because the only way she had gone out and gotten clothes in her youth was when one of them would drag her with them and hold stuff up for her to nod at or shake her head.

Her cheeks grew warm at the thought that she could be considered ‘hot,’ or pretty in any way, but it made her smile, too, at the possibility.

“I promise,” she said and took the dress. Maybe some of Mei’s confidence would have embedded itself between the stitching and would help her when she wore it some day. Su breathed in deeply, swallowing a sudden lump that had risen in her throat. She was going to miss her sister so much. “I’m going to need to enchant my mirror with your voice or something before you leave so I can remember all that.”

💖

“You won’t need to do that, you can just call me,” Mei reminded her sister. “FaceTime exists for this very reason.” 

Mei hoped that Su would call her. She worried that Su might think Mei would be too busy, but Mei would never be too busy for her baby sister. Maybe, once, that hadn’t been true. When they’d first gotten to Swynlake and Mei had been so angry that she hadn’t time for anyone but herself.

That wasn’t the same Mei that was leaving.

Mei had grown up. At least...some of the way. Enough to know that prioritizing her sisters was important. And that it could coincide with prioritizing herself and what she wanted. Maybe it was ambitious, but Mei knew that she could balance both of these things. And keeping in touch with Huey and Phineas and Vanessa and everyone else in Swynlake.

She could do this. And Su could too. She’d be okay. She’d still have Jie jie to look out for her. They’d look out for each other. And Mei would look out for herself, but she was okay with that. She wanted to.

“C’mon, there are a few other pieces in here that I think will look good on you.” She smiled at Su and then dove back into the clothing, laughing and playing dress up with her sister, like they were little kids again. Just for a moment...

[princess-mei]

Clementine’s Characters as...horses!

Mei Qin as a Lipizzaner

The breed of Lipizzaner is tough and sweet. They are one of the simplest to train as they are young and also remain highly trainable as they age. Most horses get set in their ways as they age, just as people do, but not this horse breed. They are eager to please and described as gentle, sweet, and very smart.

Of course, I must give Mei the dancing horse! I also think it’s great that so much of the literature and focus of Lipizzaners has to do with their maturity. (They start out black/bay and turn grey as they age.) Mei’s whole motif is about growing/maturing so I think that’s neat. But, it’s mostly because Lipizzaners preform!

[princess-mei]

Mei Qin Lookbook: February 2022-April 2022

[princess-mei]

Mei Qin Lookbook: April 2022-July 2022

[princess-mei]

Mei Qin – Miscellaneous Outfits: May 2022-June 2022

Musical Fundraiser (05/14)

Pride Bonfire (06/01)

Eric’s Memorial (06/02)

Hauntley Inn Garden Party (06/09)