i rate things

self explanatory if i say so myself give me more things to rate in asks

[professional-rater]

David Ives’ all in the timing specifically ‘sure thing’ and ‘variations on the death of Trotsky’ I’m doing it for my final and it’s lowk rlly funny

im simply too uneducated to know of such texts

?????/10

[professional-rater]

OK NOW THAT TYLER GAVE ME AN ASK MORE ASKS PLEASE OR ILL KNEE CAP YOUR NAN

[professional-rater]

Femboys

15

And on the seventh day, god did not rest. God slaved away, sculpting and crafting until his divine hands were blistered and bruised; he stepped back and admired his creation. As the skirt fluttered in the new breeze and a Blåhaj lay at its side, he frowned. He frowned for he knew he created something that surpassed even his sublimity, his benevolence, his perfection. He had created... Femboys

and then he toaster-bathed

11/10 amazing

[professional-rater]

Rate my fav Pokemon(‘s mega evolution) and this amateur picture I took of the sky cuz it was pretty :P

14

ABSOL MY FAVOURITE EMO POKEMON

as mega evolutions go, mega absol is definitely up there, its not stupid looking (like charizard y) or just kinda meh (like the mewtwo megas), it also gives it a really divine kinda look yk. Like i could imagine angels flying down during the rapture on a bunch of mega absols, i also notice that the hair kinda looks like the light side of a yin-yang symbol and i like that detail (if its intended)

overall 8.6/10 i like mega absol

ALSO THE SKY IS VERY PRERTTY

[professional-rater]

withered foxy from five nights at freddy's 2

hashtag rate hashtag awesomesauce

13

i really like foxy, hes gotta be my #1 in base animatronics, and THIS exact jumpscare plays in my head any time i think of the FNAF franchise

8.9/10 a whole point deducted because FNAF went downhill because of capitalism

[professional-rater]

12

i genuinely think elon musk is built to survive a car crash. just look at hose ribs bro, hes gotta have like 80 more than the average person. elon musk is just a nazi, plain and simple, retweets nazi dog whistles, supports the german "afd" party which has members that are legally allowed to be called neo nazis and have done a lot of nazi stuff before

anyway elon bad go away tesla man

-2/10 bad, bad man, get better ribcage and hairline

[professional-rater]

Visit Original Link

11

im so confused i feel like a childhood memory buried deep in my brain worms was just pushed to the forefront. I cant tell if this is something from henry stickman, battleblock theatre, castle crashers, or maybe something from undertale. or maybe this is a tylerbutbetter™ original tune

8.4 / 10 makes me feel like im a stupid little child again

[professional-rater]

10

im gonna rate @tylerbutbetter

Today, Tyler "butt" Better forced me at gunpoint to each my bookshelf, while admittedly it was rather tasty, the experience was quite the opposite. Among many situations, i have felt stress, i have felt fear even. Despite these perilous situations, none quite match to a satanic fluid monster pointing a flintlock pistol at my noggin, screaming "EAT EAT EAT EAT YOU STUPID BRIT" until i ingest the wooden chip.

9.7/10 very funny watch the tylerbutbetter channel NOW

[professional-rater]

9

SCP-3001 (Red Reality)

This has got to be one of my top 5 favourite SCPs of all time, up there with 3999 (Talloran one) and 701 (hanged king). Like watching as a researcher slowly fades away into a place with literally no reality because of his own machine is just perfect and it also has themes of isolation and its impacts (which i also really love)

My only downside is people saying Scranton turned into SCP-106 (the old man) which doesnt really make sense to me cause why would he start being really violent and how tf would he get back to normal reality? thankfully canon in SCP is more of a pick and choose sort of thing so i can just ignore that

overall 8.7/10 i like it

ART BY SUNNYCLOCKWORK ON DEVIANT ART BTW

[professional-rater]

Rate nothing, the existence of nothingness itself

8

You awaken in an empty void. Its not dark, no; that would imply there was ever light to begin with. Mass is less than negligible, volume is both minuscule and massive. You, a floating consciousness of no substance, observe with non-existent eyes, a reality that simply isn't. Limbs that were never there ache with the belief of being, your formless grey matter is scraped by an ice pick through the nose, piercing past the flesh and carving initials in your skull.

i actually really like the idea of nothingness 9.7/10

[professional-rater]

7

Cats.

I really like cats, and by that i mean the idea of cats. I love the idea of falling asleep with a cat curled up on top of you on a cold winter evening while its raining or snowing outside and youre just there, with a being whos world is so much simpler than yours, but you still could never imagine what it would be like

but my cat barely even comes into my room 8.3/10 false advertising

[professional-rater]

6

this gif, i fucking love it, its silly, its goofy, its got the little tongue stick-out

11/10 i fucking love it and i fucking love you, all problems are cured. the requiem thought only conceptual by scholars has cracked its shell of misanthropic and apathetic emotion, shining a golden ray of warm light onto a new day. a new age to set humanity away from paths of destruction and conquest, and onto a path of enlightened bliss. greed, envy, pride, all are cast to the side for this gif has superceeded the noosphereic and instinctual thirst for power, and has brought a new, more powerful, desire: hope.

[professional-rater]

Rate the number 3 because it's my favorite number

5

i think 3 is definitely up there in terms of digits 0-9, youve got the 3 musketeers, youve got 3 testicles, youve got 3 iron needed for a bucket in minecraft

but then again its also got pi (3.14...) and circles in maths can go suck a fat one, 7 is better

3/10

[professional-rater]

OMG twin is a pro rater now... im so proud, anyway rate this cool colour its not related to anything at all, totally just a random shade of blue :3

4

i think this blue can envoke many emotions and feelings, yk it kinda makes me feel like a sweater, unfurling from a frayed end slowly being dragged by the wind back to the yarn ball like a woollen fate of unavoidable entropy.

it also feels like an unrequited love, forever separated by a gap of opposing sexualities, an ending that you cant be mad at, but is still so sudden that it leaves you frustrated at the path that the universe paved for you. but then again everyones a little queer so oh well

8.6/10 reminds me of an island in the sun

[professional-rater]

3

(requested by @shortsnort)

colours: first of all, id like to say that, in the colour spectrum, violet and indigo are literally just purple, the only reason why there are 7 colours is because sir issac newton believed there were special connections in the universe to the number 7

anyway: i like red the most, specifically dark red cause it can represent so much (lust, anger, pain, a stop, etc) and like its just really pretty

but it is kinda new because colour was only invented in like 1920s or 30s

a newbie, but id give it a solid 6.8, underrated, but it should know its place

[professional-rater]

fish

2

fish, fish, fish... what can i say about fish that hasnt been put on a bass pro shop article of clothing.

Fish are a wide and varied species, which i think plays to their advantage, youve got shit like pufferfish, clownfish, and also wobbegongs (their name is fun). And just putting this here cause i hate when people say it BLOBFISH DONT LOOK LIKE THAT NORMALLY, IMAGINE IF YOU WERE DRAGGED INTO AN ENVIRONMENT WITH 100x THE ATMOSPHERIC PRESSURE LETS SEE YOU LOOK PRETTY

anyway 7.7/10 i like fish

[professional-rater]

1

rocks (in general, specific crystals, elements, etc are still open to rating)

8/10 - fun to throw, fun to collect on a walk, sometimes very pretty and you can throw them across lakes and stuff