ClockworkOrange

Thomas Asher, Aura-reading Human, 41, Chemistry Professor by day, Drug Dealer by night (Closed blog for Wicked's Rest RPG)

[professorasher]

hikarinarisawa​:

sell items antiquities how to 

rich person antiquities collector website

real japanese sushi sake where white crest

[user has unintentionally attached a stock image photo of sake]

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[pm] Are you okay?  Let me bring you some proper sake and we can talk.

[professorasher]

chasseurdeloup​:

No, the tiger has not been found yet. Yes, we are aware it’s been a few weeks. 

Please only call animal control if you’ve seen the tiger or, uh, any tiger or any actual relevant problem. 

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What a fantastic job by White Crest Animal Control. Weeks? It’s a tiger, not a flea. Town isn’t that huge, is it? Are you guys okay?

[professorasher]

bly-hildegard​:

Is there anyone anyone who is willing to be interviewed? My professor is offering extra credit if I talk to people around town about their experiences and how their life took turns and led them into a path they didn’t see coming. I think she thinks it’s like inspirational for us or whatever 

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Who is your Professor? If they allow colleagues to be interviewed, I’m a willing subject. My biggest life change was moving to White Crest which was certainly a major turn-around.

[professorasher]

humanmoodring​:

In lieu of the tiger still being on the loose, the library will be showing Life of Pi this Sunday. Because nothing says, “Let’s find a missing tiger” like a movie about a lost tiger. On that note, it’s probably advised to, like, not engage with a large, hungry animal, but if that’s your prerogative, go for it. 

That last sentence isn’t sponsored by the library, by the way, so don’t go telling people that White Crest Library made you do it if you get your hand eaten.

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I can only imagine what the library deems appropriate to show if there is a murder or kidnapping or something. Do you show Carrie during Prom season too?

[eloycadena]

professorasher​:

[pm] I thought this person needed sleep help now. A week is fine. Just let me know when.

❖

[pm] I’ll be in town on Wednesday. Pick a place and I will meet you there at sunset.

[professorasher]

[pm] I will be in touch on Wednesday.

[eloycadena]

professorasher​:

[pm] I’m going to need more details than that. Is there any way you can meet with me in person so we can discuss this further?

❖

[pm] I can be there next week, but don’t need delivery made for another three. There are still some things that need arranging.

[professorasher]

[pm] I thought this person needed sleep help now. A week is fine. Just let me know when.

[eloycadena]

professorasher​:

[pm] I have all sorts of sleeping aids. Do they desire dreamless sleep? Perhaps Astral projection-inducing? Lucid dreams? Is it a medical condition that is keeping them awake? Stress?

❖

[pm] Anything to help vampires? Getting them down long enough to help with some…healing would be perfect.

[professorasher]

[pm] I'm going to need more details than that. Is there any way you can meet with me in person so we can discuss this further?

[eloycadena]

@professorasher

[pm] I hear you have quite the assortment of substances. Do you have anything that will help with sleeping? I have a dear one that needs help and would love to get something delivered.

[professorasher]

[pm] I have all sorts of sleeping aids. Do they desire dreamless sleep? Perhaps Astral projection-inducing? Lucid dreams? Is it a medical condition that is keeping them awake? Stress?

[idkxwriting]

Okay Daniel.

[soundsofmyuniverse]

[professorasher]

@luciengascoigne

[natalieswood-deactivated2021100]

[professorasher]

inbextween​:

[pm] Oh, um, thank you! I look forward to it!

Is this Are you Ending online convos is still so weird

END

[professorasher]

fermataheart​:

.

Like, I choose like. Not all murders, just specifically this one… you know, because of the melting. Other murders remind me of plenty of other things. Carving pumpkins, scarecrows, making snow angels, gardening… are the few that spring to mind. On something? God no, I wish.

.

[pm] I can fulfill your desire for weird fall things, murders, and illicit substances if you meet me at the carnival. I prefer having conversations face to face, even when the mimes are watching.

[professorasher]

inbextween​:

[pm] Nope, no procrastinating here! Gives me too much anxiety. I can’t wait!

Oh, that’s really cool, actually. I didn’t even know that subject existed, to be honest. It didn’t! It wasn’t boring at all! I love learning new things, in anything, really. What do you do with that? Or, um– like what kind of experiments and stuff? 

It’s infinitely fascinating. We find out something new about the dawn of humanity every time we look back on it. It’s incredible. I guess not! Either way, it can’t hurt, right?

[pm] Anxiety is my middle name- I hope to be able to answer all of your questions and more this semester. And feel free to message me any time you need. My office/online hours only really end when I’m asleep.

Until then, keep theorizing and stay curious!

[professorasher]

wizcheese​:

….

Well, technically I think there was service dress-code violations

But dad raised us to never turn away a customer, so I guess this is my first bathtube-side service call. 

Because they go along with alot of milk and cheese related vitamin and skin scare supplements. 

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Does any of your cheese possess non-dairy-like properties? Anything unnatural? As a Chemist, I am fascinated by the idea of a Cheesery that appeals to non-humans. 

[professorasher]

themidnightfarmer​:

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[pm] Very. I can be very discreet, I used to do all sorts of work before I left town a few months ago. Name it, I’m very trustworthy no matter the…circumstances.

.

[pm] Quid pro quo, Jared. I like information too. Why did you leave town? And why return?

[professorasher]

nelllraiser​:

[pm] That’s fair- people usually just assume you’re too out there to actually do anything productive. But still- it’s not the best idea to go around talking about it to normies or they’re gonna start getting ideas that are gonna end in death.

I’m not patronizing, I’m helping (: For a professor you seem to be having a hard time understanding English 

.

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[pm] I’m not an English Professor. The subtleties of your snark escape me sometimes. Though perhaps you were too busy talking to notice.