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holding for jongin: day 345 of 641 โณ EXO KAI for Gucci via Esquire Korea | February 2022
wonshik:
it doesnโt take long for someone else to approach him, some businesswoman wonshik faintly remembers from a launch party months back. the small talk is boring, but he gets strained smiles and compliments he doesnโt mean nonetheless. then, opportunity presents itself: a familiar face appears next to them, and wonshik gives the woman the sort of distracted look that really is a dismissal in itself, and turns in his seat. โwontaek, man, itโs good to see you.โ he doesnโt remember meeting in person before, but they mustโve; the circle is small, as evidenced by their shared history. wonshik isnโt sure thatโs enough cause to strike up conversation, but heโs desperate, and he wouldnโt mind a good distraction. itโs not like wontaek looks particularly busy. โcongrats on your relationship. you want a drink?โ
heโs trying to be a good man. but pray tell, what is a good man? would wontaek know the concept if it bludgeoned him bloody, a line of crimson drool to delineate all that is too good and too bad in this world? they say you know a man is good by the way that he treats women but heโs never had the chance to witness it himself. grandmother in the ground, six feet under, before he met her. mother, skulking in shadows, her likeness ghosting across his panel, a ghost beckoning for forgiveness.
grandfather had taught him how to walk the world as if it owed you nothing but who had taught him to not wrench flowers from the earth? experience is the worst kind of teacher. and as wontaek bites down on the tender meat of deception, he tries his best to be that ever so painstaking good man. here, the night is cool and heady. heโs on his third ( most likely fourth ) cigarette of the night, perhaps on his fourth whisky, and the fundraiser has transitioned from charity to sweet, sweet hedonism.ย
he thinks heโll go for a fifth finger, so off he goes ambling to the bar when he lays his eyes on wonshik. a man after his own heart in a way he still wishes wasnโt true. misery loves company, as they say.
โmotherfucker,โ he jests, slapping the other lightly on the back. he throws a curt nod in the direction of wonshikโs company as he slides onto the barstool next to him. โarenโt you a sight for sore eyes. how you been?โ itโs always interesting to see the other man, moreso on the other side of circumstance. itโs not the first time such a thing has happened, though this time he has no reason to assign such feelings such as hate or envy to this particular being. hubris aside, wonshik is of the decent kind, someone he sees himself breaking bread with and sharing aโฆ โyeah man, iโll have another whisky, neat,โ he says, nodding at the bartender. theyโre both victims in this situation, both cut by the politics of love. it makes for a good story, perhaps even aย good friend, no matter the sting.
โgirlfriend?โ the laugh he utters is cruel, bitter. heโs had a little much to drink, pardon him. โi donโt think i know who youโre talking about.โ itโs all tongue-in-cheek, a game, now that he can laugh about it. but he could tell you how the room had shrunk around him when he all came to a head. how the only way he could shake the feeling of defeat, of inadequacy, was by emptying it all out on a canvas, the very one up for sale at this very event. โhonestly, i think iโm going to die a bachelor. iโll probably live longer that way.โ
Anaรฏs Nin, Delta of Venus, originally published: 1977
> good evening, [user]. you have THREE patch updates waiting to be installed. click REBLOG to download?
LOADINGโฆ PANEL UPGRADES [ the new panel upgrade now allows for synchronised customisation between two users. ]
the receiver can create a playlist, moodboard, web weaving, or any other aesthetic that theyโd like about their museโs relationship with the sender, and terra will upload this to their fully customisable shared panel.
LOADINGโฆ SECURITY REINFORCEMENT [ terrascape prides itself on security, and all your secrets are safe and confidential with us. ]
write ~3 headcanons about your muse and the senderโs, and terra promises to keep it safe from prying eyes.
LOADINGโฆ IMPROVED COMMUNICATIONS [ communications on terra are now faster and better than before. ]
send โ๏ธ for the last text the receiver sent to the sender,ย ๐ for a heartfelt text the receiver sent to the sender,ย ๐จ for a text the receiver sent and couldnโt recall in time to the sender,ย ๐ฉ for a drunk text the receiver found in their drafts that they havenโt sent to the sender.
where shall we begin? story has it that wontaek isnโt a curious man. for years he did not mind the limitations of man, a concept that lay buried in the deep recesses of his mind. his childhood painted a picture of the banal; who knew there could be violence in ubiquity? the same breakfast, lunch and dinner to promise nutrition. the same uniforms to ward off envy. the same routines to foster discipline. heโs eight years old when a man in a grey pinstripe suit and a mahogany cane visits the orphanage and changes his life forever.ย
though, it didnโt take very long for wontaekโs father, a inky smudge on the bucolic horizon, to spread his blight. a miserable man, concerned with the fleeting numbers of his rating. wontaek tries to think very little of him but it is becoming increasingly difficult as of late. that morning he had watched the man, age having pulled his features downwards, slide between panic and paranoia as he waved around an outdated will. one that did not name wontaek as heir. and as he and his grandfather sat as audience to the manโs tirade, he couldnโt help but ponder upon quandaries such as blood and water.ย
another name, stark in century type, had stood out in both editions of the will. a high flying woman whoโs wings may have melted for she may have flown too close to the sun, so much so that the only trace of information he could get on her was that she has a daughter. and so what? story has it that wontaek isnโt a curious man, right?
certain of his grandfatherโs penchant for philanthropy but more so of his fatherโs need to create a life only to abandon it, wontaek thinks that perhaps his father had made another mistake, another blunder that he tried very well to sweep under a rug. one that his grandfather had tried to put the pieces back together somehow. and if his suspicions are right then he could be that same life changing force for a certain maruyama reina that his grandfather was. which is why he waits outside the glass doors of re:skin, a lit cigarette perched between the plush of his lips.ย
he stands straight, his leather briefcase stationed by the tip of his italian shoes. the suit heโs donned for the occasion seems a little on the nose but it made sense at the time. moments go by as he watches people leave the building untilโฆ heโs sureโฆ โmaruyama reina?โ he calls out, his hand jutting out to a woman heโs sure he has spent the last few hours poring over her online presence, trying to figure out if they possibly share a father. โiโm sorry to bother you but do you mind if i ask you a few questions?โ
hereditary w/ @fiskesprett
holding for jongin: day 265 of 641 โณย EXO KAIย photographed by Go Won-tae for Gucci viaย Esquire Koreaย |ย March 2021
cha wontaek. 3d environment artist @ orbit gaming. penned by ares (21+, s/h, gmt)
hey hi hello. it's me again after shamefully changing muses. like if you wanna plot, y'know the drill.
tw family death
NOBODY TO SOMEBODY
what sort of parents sign up for a kid only to abandon him and sign him over to the state? cha daehyun and lee bitna, a celebrity couple. thought that their relationship could stand the test of time and fandom. what the public didn't know was that they had plans to get pregnant, to start a family.
papers were signed and a baby was on its way. only, once news of their marriage broke, daehyun's rating started to plummet and the cowardice began to show. he promptly ditched and like a contagion, bitna's fear of losing her spot in the limelight became all too consuming. so she signed wontaek over to the state, giving him nothing but his life and a name.
life in the orphanage wasn't too bad, for the most part wontaek's needs were met. he didn't have to ask for much. but the sting of not being wanted even after the trouble of applying for him in the first place did not miss him. and where do all those feelings go?
he was a terror to all of those who knew him, volatile in personality with a short fuse to boot. pain has a way as masking itself as anger and wontaek donned his mask at too young of an age.
he's eight when a man comes to the orphanage to claim him. he introduces himself has his grandfather, the one responsible for his worthless son who had abandoned him.
from orphan to future heir, life really hit wontaek FAST. his grandpa being from a long line of simulation tech investors, wontaek was shuttled from the belt to the the gated districts where he would come to call the sprawling cha estate home.
generational wealth wasn't something he could put words to but the magnitude of change was. he became more confident and less angry, more talkative, made more of a presence in the rooms he walked into. it was almost if wontaek came into himself.
as he grew older he fostered a connection to the arts, painting being his preferred medium. he went to art school and came out the other side as a 3d environment artist (don't you just love nepotism?). he's done a lot of jobs, his resume spanning from designing simulation environments for coach to orbit gaming, working currently on the iron fists games.
he's twenty seven when the news of his grandpa's degenerative illness breaks and although he still has a few years on him, there are talks of the inheritance and who the cha assets should be passed on to. wontaek is his grandfather's likely pick but as of recent daehyun has been rearing his ugly head to claim what should be his. risking revealing to the world a near thirty year old misdemeanour, he has come for the cha inheritance and he won't go down without a fight.
terse conversations before family lawyers become a standard routine these days and daehyun's return to the cha estate has seen wontaek having to confront the ugly trauma of his early childhood.
but right now? he's just trying to make good with what he's got and the very little time he has left with grandpa.
PERSONALITY
leo sun, pisces moon and leo rising.
if you thought he was a cocky bastard, then youโre right.ย
has always been here for a good time not a long time but as of late he's been roped into doing a lot of family stuff and Stepping Up To The Plate now that his gramps is sick.
his upbringing and estranged relo with his parents makes him cerebral and prone to moodiness, and rather than causing trouble nowadays he airs out his shit on the canvas.
when heโs in that place heโs selfish (more than usual), callous, and self critical.
otherwise heโs good vibes on a good day. if you can get past the entitlement.