shit smosh says (as ask memes)
this is entirely self-indulgent and i will not be ashamed
"Um...You are fucking up my costume party."
"Well I can't stand up my legs are broken."
"I can hear myself breathing!"
"I think you legally have to look at me."
"You're really a dark person."
"DiGiorno's for the oven, Totinos for the microwave...And the memories are for us."
"You almost just faded out! I don't know where you went just then!"
"She went to chillis and got a watermelon margarita once."
"Disgusting. Disgusting. Disgusting. DISGUSTING."
"I feel like there's a gas leak in the room."
"Zero coffee, two chiefs? Come on!"
"The cops said I can't do anything 'cause he's just standing there!"
"Beep beep! Gay coming through!"
"They asked me out of pity and now I'm here and I'm fucking it all up!"
"I guess that is what that is, that makes sense now."
"I've been sitting under that blanket the whole time."
"Your mustache is slowly turning into the batman symbol."
"I read a sign at the zoo and it said gorillas are friendly, that is FALSE."
"Was that too much?"
"I can either drink, fuck, or play."
"The truth will set you free."
"My tit just deflated."
"A miniature game, how quaint."
"I cannot believe you did that twice."
"Help me! I just signed up for insurance!"
Bonus: Amanda's rant
"That was so awful! I literally feel so betrayed! I feel like you almost went off a bridge and then you were like 'I'm taking the keys' and you LEFT me hanging and you walked to the nearest town! And I was all by myself! And you took my wallet? And it's so cold, I have NO jacket, I dressed up for the night! I have nothing, I have no protection!"












