Themes in the fodlan games that the house leaders and byleth have
crest related difficulties (Edelgard, Byleth, Claude)
trauma informing character (Edelgard, Dimitri, Byleth (through Sothis and after Jeralt))
struggling under society (class, race, etc) (Claude, Dimitri, Byleth)
so Edelgard, Dimitri, and Claude can understand two of the three important themes, and Byleth understands all three, which is maybe why the house leaders can only have a happy ending (with a full picture of what needs to change) with Byleth by their side.
edelgard has obviously had her crest trauma, and that is also her trauma trauma. She sees behind the veneer of high society and sees how important crests are, and she sees that cycles of trauma and violence are dangerous.
dimitri has had the tragedy of duscar thing, as well as being homeless during the timeskip - but even before then his closeness with Dedue and witnessing the genocide of duscar that he couldn't stop help him to understand societal problems well. His main motivator outside of the hearing voices thing is to 'stop the cycle of the strong trampling the weak'
claude has had both discrimination and blessings from his reigan crest popping up in fodlan, and has had to endure anti almyran racism as well as a society entrenched in xenophobia
Byleth has been a financially unstable mercenary, has been tampered with to have a good crest and has been given power because of their crest (which they did notice in white clouds), and has sothis' trauma that they can recall and lost their father.
without byleth edelgard wages war trying to ensure no child endures what she did, and trying to eliminate crests, but because she doesn't understand societal issues like poverty, class divide, power abuses, racism etc, she is missing a fundamental part of the picture. She doesn't know why people are so upset with her about the war - she can't know how much damage she's doing to commoner's lives by uprooting people and destroying the land, not at least at a fundamental empathetic level
without byleth dimitri tries to give peace to the victims of trauma (by killing edelgard, he's a bit confused but he's got the spirit etc etc), and understands that edelgard's war and society are causing issues for the commoners, he understands that the unchecked power of his uncle and Cornelia have hurt people. but he doesn't understand why edelgard is waging war. he doesn't know about the crest system's abuses.
without byleth claude knows how powerful and dangerous crests can be - he wants to know why, he knows how discrimination works and he's seen how location of a society can cause war (Almyra and fodlan's locket), but he doesn't understand the core troubles of fodlan. he doesn't get that rhea is motivated by her trauma, that edelgard wants to avoid it happening again and is thereby causing a war, that dimitri is fighting this hard because he wants to silence the voices caused by his trauma. he doesn't understand the cycles of violence and struggle that inevitably repeat in fodlan if something doesn't change.
Maybe one reason Shez's endings aren't happy isn't just because byleth is the main character so they get to be the important piece to the puzzle, but also because shez understands trauma (they lost everyone they cared about regularly), and poverty and society, but shez doesn't understand crests, and how they affect society. That could be why Azure Gleam is such a nothing route - shez and dimitri both have the same sort of perspectives. society needs to change, people need to stop experiencing trauma, but neither of them understands how crests affect society. Sylvain takes on a bigger role, trying to get them to understand, but for main character reasons, Byleth seems to be the only person whose perspective can help Dimitri's.
I feel like the connected the dots meme guy. I can't quite articulate stuff rn. but I connected the dots.
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