Filles De Boucheries

Bunny|22|not Catholic, I just have issues| followers are evil by association

[iilluussoorr]

Lunacy (2005, dir. Jan Švankmajer)

[beautifulminduglythings-moved]

AUTISM PROS:

Sexually Unstoppable

AUTISM CONS:

The Torture

[purityclub]

Actually that was really dumb disregard that im fine and things will get better.

[purityclub]

nah but really if i think about it for more than a minute im very sure i must x myself regardless of the potential for life to improve, i will never be truly happy with a body that hurts this much and a brain that works like this. at times i care about how this will affect ppl but other times the desire to be nothing is stronger than the guilt or responsibility i feel. i cant put into words how tired i am.

[kristina100000]

women in their 20s in college are like i will literally kill myself

[heavensghost]

You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.

(Ceramic star)

[ibegyoutospit]

[witchertia-deactivated20220817]

[thenighteternal]

[purityclub]

oh hey sorry i dont have lymphoma i am waiting to be accepted to mayoclinic or a local research hospital because no one can tell me what the fucks wrong with me. sorry for being dramatic im fine. ive been fandom blogging instead of doing anything productive cuz its the knly rhing that makes me not wanna kms ha

[purityclub]

i’m also in such a lucky position to be sick, i live with my parents and use their insurance, my mom will take care of me and I think the medical debt should be relatively limited! Treatments are pretty straight forward for most types and i dont need to travel or anything. this will all be fine either way! I’m very lucky and i bet I’ll be fine in like a year. there’s like a 95% rate of non-relapse for my age group within five years of dx so it’s all good man I’m just going to focus on school and hang out with my boyfriend and then when this is over i can work on leaving America. its all gonna be groovy

[purityclub]

It’s D-Day babe. I’m pretty sure that my follow-up today is going to tell me if I have cancer. While there’s no way to be certain and shit can go wrong in the lab, I’m pretty sure it’s lymphoma, and not in a hypochondriac way. I’ve tested false positives for active mono a year apart, with two hospital confirmed infections when I was a teenager. I’ve ruled out every virus and infection that can cause false positives, they’re very rare but do happen. I’ve done so much research to find out exactly what’s going on, and the only consistent cause is EBV positive tumors that let the old viral DNA into the blood. I got warned when I was 18 about my risk for this after the second mono infection. It’s just so wild because my grandma died of lymphoma/leukemia two months ago. They say it’s not exactly genetic, meaning theres no identifiable gene in most types, but my moms side of the family has a lot of issues like this. I can’t stop reading medical studies because it’s actually SO interesting that Epstein Barr Virus is such a unique biological freak. A study came out last year about how they suspect a ’hit and run’ strategy where the virus keeps replicating way after its supposed ti leave your system in specific lymphatic tissue just long enough to fuck shit up by turning off the anti-tumor genes and then the virus dips out? so they open up these tumors and find tiny trace DNA of EBV activity unrelated to the antibodies that most people have, but no active virus. It’s just so!! fucking weird!!!

[purityclub]

U guys are so fucking lucky that I can’t allow myself to fandom blog. So fucking lucky

[purityclub]

Jk i made one and its pure dopamine idk why i thought i had to grow out of being a dweeb

[purityclub]

Damn this week sounds so stressful for you :( I really really hope ur diagnosis ends up alright, sending much love your way <3

Thank you, it is very stressful but I’ve been distracting myself and sleeping a lot. I’m actually looking forward to all of this being over. There’s like no scenario in which I don’t get better within the next few years and then I vow to never ever get sick again haha! Thank you for checking in ❤️

[yourddoris]

LOVE

[yourddoris]

杜桑，晚香玉

[purityclub]

It’s Mary Magdalene time again girls :(

A woman’s war unoccupied history BITCH