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The Land Before Time S1E3: The Star Day Celebration
Last Time: Ruby took a spa day to recover from the stress of watching Chomper. Just one day away, what could it hurt? During that, Chomper lost a tooth and freaked out, dragging everyone else all over the Great Valley just to find Ruby and interrupt her spa day to ask what's going on. He did and she told him it was fine and normal, making him feel better.
Ruby's a kid herself, she should not have the responsibility of watching after this dramatic and high-maintenance child.
The episode opens at night. The Gang are doing shadow puppet charades by moonlight, and Littlefoot's up.
He does biting motions, and Ruby correctly guesses that he's a Bellydragger (shout-out to Dil, I hope she's doing bad).
Spike is up next. He makes croaking noises and then rears up on his hind legs to eat some leaves using his tongue.
Ducky can tell that he's a Hopper.
Littlefoot: "You make a shadow, Petrie!"
Petrie (shuddering): "Oh-wuh-wuh-wuh-whoa!"
Chomper (whispering to Littlefoot): "What's that supposed to be?"
Littlefoot (whispering): "Uh... I think it's Petrie, being nervous."
Ducky: "Do not be afraid of the shadows we are making, Petrie!"
Petrie: "Mmmme not afraid of Ducky's shadow, me afraid of that!" *he points*
The Gang turns around to see a growling, snarling silhouette emerge from a bush, thrashing all around. Everyone backs up in fear.
It's obviously just Cera with a branch stuck to her horn.
They hide behind the rock and Petrie thinks it got Cera (okay, so he at least recognizes that as Cera's voice).
They scream as it approaches!
Then the intro starts. Really? This is the cliff-hanger we're ending the cold open with?
Also, something I've noticed more often in this show is the characters following the "three-quarters rule" of acting, where you always face the audience a little bit, even when you're supposed to be looking sideways or away from the audience. It's weird to see it in a tv show, and I don't think they did this nearly as much in the movies.
After the intro, surprise surprise, I was right, it's Cera with a branch stuck on her horn.
The rest are genuinely surprised to see it's her. I don't know why, but whatever. She took a shortcut and it went bad.
She's also annoyed they're just standing around gawking instead of helping her get this branch off her face, so they all grab it and pull.
But as you can see above, Ruby falls, landing hard on her back. She sits up, woozy.
Ducky: "Ruby, are you okay?!"
Ruby: "Oh my, my star!"
Petrie: "Me sometimes see stars when me fall!"
Ruby: "No, my Star Day star! Look, it's the one right there!" *she points at a star in the sky* "It's special because it can only be seen three nights between cold times! Once the star is a foot away from the Night Circle, it will be my Star Day!" *she pulls her foot up to demonstrate*
Good "foot" pun.
Cera: "A Star Day? What's that?"
Ruby: "A Star Day is the day you hatched! My mom said that same star appeared in the same place on the same day I hatched!"
Ohhh, it's a birthday, I was wondering where she was going with this. Interesting that this is a concept Ruby and her family have but Cera hasn't even heard of. A little insight into Sharptooth culture here. Or at least Fast Runner culture.
So the anniversary of Ruby's hatching is either tomorrow or the next day. Neat.
Chomper: "Oh yeah, it was your Star Day the day we left the Mysterious Beyond!"
Wait, that was a full year ago? Usually the series doesn't commit to concrete frames of time like this. Like in 11, the Tree Sweet Tree only blooms once in "a long time", not giving a specific frame of reference for how much time passed between the three times it bloomed in the film.
This actually leads into a flashback showing the Star Day in question. Ruby, her parents, and her two younger siblings are washing up in a pond, with Chomper sitting off to the side on the shore.
Ruby's dad (purple): "Happy Star Day, Ruby!"
Ruby's mom (pink): "I'm glad we could spend this Star Day together."
Ruby: "Me too mom, just saying 'I love you' doesn't say how much I love you! Oh!" *they hug*
Ruby's mom: "And we love you too, Ruby."
Ruby (choking up): "I already miss you, and I haven't even left!"
Ruby's dad: "Well, you must learn how Chomper's friends in the Great Valley work together!"
Ruby's mom: "Yes Ruby, that knowledge could one day save us all fro-"
Chomper: "Red Claw!!"
Red Claw and his Fast Biters approach from around a corner! Ruby's dad and mom lead their younger kids down one path, while Chomper leads Ruby down another path!
Red Claw pauses at the pond, then roars instructions to his Fast Biters. They roar back and all three chase after Chomper and Ruby! The two kids hide in a crack in the wall, as the large Sharpteeth pass by outside.
Having lost track of them, Red Claw orders the Fast Biters to move on. The kids emerge from the crack and Chomper spots something notable about the rockface. He tells her to follow him, and they climb it.
Once at the top, Chomper recognizes Saurus Rock in the distance and tells her the Great Valley is this way. Ruby looks back toward her family.
She hears Red Claw roaring in the distance, then steels herself with determination.
Ruby: "Let's go!"
That's where the flashback ends.
Man, that was good. The voice acting on Ruby getting choked up got me all choked up. I really wish this flashback, as well as the events before and after it, had been a full prologue movie/episode for the tv show, instead of just starting in medias res with The Cave of Many Voices.
Interesting that Ruby's not just here to keep Chomper safe, but also she's got a mission: to learn cooperation and someday defeat Red Claw with that knowledge.
The Gang are impressed with the story, going "wow" in sync.
Ruby: "That Star Day was the last day I saw my family... sorry... Star Days with my family were always so happy." *choking up* "But, thinking about it, makes me sad."
Chomper: "I didn't mean to make you sad, Ruby. C'mon, let's play some more shadow games!"
He walks up on the rock and grrrs while raising his arms.
Ruby: "Thanks, Chomper, but I don't feel like playing anymore."
She walks away. Petrie doesn't get it, she's not alone, she has friends! Littlefoot and Ducky say that it's just not the same, and she misses her family a lot. Chomper announces that he's gonna go cheer her up! He starts running toward her, but Cera dashes in front of him.
Cera: "Let's not make it worse."
Ruby walks away and comes to a stream. She looks down and sees her reflection, then sheds a tear into the water and flashes back to previous Star Days.
Ruby's mom: "It's your Star Day today, Ruby-"
Ruby's mom: "-and it's important for you to be clean for your special celebration-"
Ruby's mom: "-after all, a Star Day is a very happy occasion!"
The flashback ends and we cut back to the present.
Ruby: *sigh* "Why does thinking about happy Star Days make me feel so sad?"
Goddamn, I'm gonna start crying. Geez. Wow. I didn't know the writers and animators still had it in them to illicit genuine emotion. I haven't felt like this since movie 10. And having the stream remind her of the washing up her mom always had her do before her Star Day celebration is a really nice way to tie it together and add a personal touch to make it more relatable.
So, I guess that means Ruby is 5 years old? The three Star Days in this flashback, plus the one with Chomper, plus the one now makes 5. I don't think she's meant to be the human equivalent of 5, I read her more as 10-12, but chronologically, she's 5 years old.
Over with The Gang, Chomper's feeling bad about making Ruby feel sad.
Littlefoot has an idea: a Giving Ceremony! And Cera adds on that it can be a surprise! Everyone really likes the idea and starts getting really into it!
Chomper: "Wait, everybody, WAIT!!! Um... what's a Giving Ceremony?"
Cera: "A Giving Ceremony is when you give someone their favorite food, duh!"
Spike: "Uh-huh, mm-hmm!"
Ducky: "A Giving Ceremony is a time for celebrating 'giving', 'friendship', and also 'sharing'."
So they're gonna throw Ruby a surprise birthday party. Makes sense. What's interesting is that this is, conceptually, VERY similar to The Time of the Great Giving, the Thanksgiving-esque ending of 3 where all the dinosaurs in the Great Valley had to share food for a time because most of it was destroyed by the drought and fire. The narrator even said they would pass down the story of this time and call it "The Time of the Great Giving", that's an in-universe name. I wonder if this "Giving Ceremony" is actually inspired by that event.
Littlefoot asks Chomper what Ruby's favorite food is, and he says it's Sweet Bubbles! That sounds more like a fruit than meat... looking it up, Oviraptors were most likely omnivorous. Huh. TIL. They agree to surprise Ruby with Sweet Bubbles tomorrow.
The next day, Ruby is washing up in a pool, and The Gang are watching her from behind a log, discussing their plan to surprise her. Sweet Bubbles are a fruit, they grow on vines in the Sheltering Grass.
Oh, that's convenient, they were going to play in the Sheltering Grass in 2, it's just past the Sinking Sand. Petrie's scared about going there, though, so I'm pretty sure the writers just re-used the name without checking to see what the context around it is. They agree to go, for the sake of making Ruby happy. Ruby ducks underwater and they take that as their cue to sneak past her.
I love all the character put into these sneaking bits, how Cera is sneaking with determination and Spike isn't even trying, with Petrie hanging onto his tail and flailing.
The camera focuses on Ruby, she swims underwater and surfaces to see Ducky's mom playing with her sisters. This triggers song 1 of the episode: Remembering. Skip to 9:56 for the song.
This episode is out for emotional blood, and it's taking no prisoners. This song is short even by the standards of this show, less than a minute. For that, I do have to dock it a point or two. And the scene of her leaving with Chomper doesn't match the earlier flashback.
But those are fucking nitpicks, this song is beautiful and the flashbacks accompanying it are adorable and heartbreaking. Seeing her siblings hatch, swimming together, and then the family sleeping under the night sky. It's enough to make a grown man cry.
As an aside to distract me from my broken heart, does this show think that Oviraptors swam a lot? Is that why we keep seeing Ruby in the water? That was actually a prominent theory, that Oviraptors were semi-aquatic and used their beaks to crush and eat mollusks... in 1977. By 1980, there was a strong case against their arms being suited for swimming and for eating leaves, and by 1995, there was digestive evidence for them being carnivorous, eating lizards. Nowadays, it's accepted they were omnivorous, eating small animals as well as nuts and seeds.
The semi-aquatic theory hasn't been mainstream since before the first Land Before Time movie, so it's odd that it seems to the primary source used for Ruby in the show, especially if you recall her eating a clam whole in the first episode.
Getting back to The Gang, they're walking along the edge of a gorge with a tree nearby, Petrie nervous with how near they are to the Mysterious Beyond.
Suddenly, an Earthshake happens, and part of the ledge gives way! Everyone but Littlefoot (and Petrie, obviously) falls into the gorge! And because of the Earthshake, water starts rushing into the gorge, too!
But Littlefoot has an idea, he tells Petrie to loop a vine around the tree branch, then dangle the other end in! Littlefoot grabs the high end with his teeth and tells Ducky and Chomper to go first, since they're the smallest!
Littlefoot manages to pull them up, then Petrie flies the vine back down to Cera, who bites on and Littlefoot, Chomper, and Ducky pull her up!
Petrie flies the vine back down and then it's Spike's turn, and they all try to pull him up but then the vine snaps! Spike falls into the water, and it's reaching high enough he can barely keep his head above water!
Cera thinks fast and runs to impale her horn on a long nearby tree branch, then she dangles that down and they pull on that to pull Spike up!
This was a pretty solid rescue scene. The Earthshake was random, but the solution made good use of Littlefoot's ingenuity, Petrie's agility, and Cera's strength. And it happened so fast the tension was high the whole time.
After, Chomper sniffs the air and alerts the rest. It smells like Sweet Bubbles! They run and find a bunch (Sweet Bubbles are grapes). They try to pluck some, but they're weighed down by a rock. A rock with eyes! The kids duck and cover as the rock stands up aaaaaand it's Mr. Clubtail.
Or, well, it doesn't sound like him, so maybe it's a different Clubtail? Or they just recast him. This guy seems a bit more ornery than Mr. Clubtail usually is. He says these are his Sweet Bubbles and no-one else can have any.
Cera tries talking tough and demanding them, but he burps in her face.
Chomper tries roaring to scare him off, but he laughs in his face.
Finally, Ducky tries just telling him why they want them.
Ducky: "Excuse me, we would like to have some Sweet Bubbles for our friend's Star Day!"
Clubtail: *gasp*
Ducky: "They are her favoritest food."
Clubtail: "Star Day?! Did you say 'Star Day'?! Why, I've loved my Star Day ever since I was a hatchling! Take as many as you like!!"
See? He may be a gluttonous, greedy slob, but you can appeal to his better nature. Interesting that Clubtails also have a Star Day tradition. The kids celebrate by eating some Sweet Bubbles.
Over with Ruby, she sniffs a flower and flashes back to her little siblings wishing her a happy Star Day.
Okay, so maybe she's 6? Or this is later in the day of one of the Star Days we already saw.
In the present, she muses to herself.
Ruby: "Hmm. Maybe I can't be with my family, but I can be with my friends. And if I'm not alone, I won't feel alone. But first, I have to find everybody!"
The Gang are back, with this very picturesque little bunch of grapes. Chomper wants to set up a Giving Circle, but Cera tells him to let someone who actually knows what a Giving Ceremony is handle the preparations.
They hear Ruby calling out for them, and Littlefoot, Ducky, and Chomper go to distract her, while Cera sets up.
Ruby: "Oh, hello my friends, my friends hello!"
Littlefoot, Ducky, and Chomper: "Oh-" "Oh, hi-" "hi" "-Ruby!" "-Ruby!"
Ruby: "Is there something wrong?"
Chomper: "Uh, no, we're just uh, uh-"
Littlefoot: "Coming back from a long walk and um-"
Ducky: "We are very tired, we are, we are!"
They all yawn unconvincingly. Ruby wanted to play, but they say they need a rest, so maybe later.
Ruby: "Oh. Okay. Maybe I'll just go to my Thinking Place to watch my Star Day star."
She leaves and then they awkwardly go back to setting up.
Later, she's sitting on this cliff at dusk.
Ruby: *sigh* "Well, I guess a lonely Star Day is better than no Star Day, 'cause if I didn't have a Star Day, than I wouldn't have hatched, and not hatching would be much lonelier than a lonely Star Day-"
Suddenly, another Earthshake happens! The ground underneath her gives way and she falls, clinging to the ledge! She yells for help!
The others are just about done setting up her Giving Circle when they feel the Earthshake, too!
They hear Ruby yelling for help in the distance! Chomper remembers what she said about her Thinking Place and he knows where that is, so he leads them to her!
With Ruby, she summons up the strength to climb the ledge!
Ruby: "I don't want this Star Day to be my last... day!"
Filled with resolve, she climbs the rock she was dangling from and manages to jump off of it just before it falls!
But the Earthshake is still going so she hides in that cave, and then a massive boulder seals the entrance! She tries to go through the cave, but more rocks seal the other end, trapping her inside!
Ruby (hyperventilating): "Huh, huh, hah, I wish I was with my f-friends!"
But then she hears Chomper calling her name from the other side of the boulder! She calls back that she's okay, but the big boulder will keep her in here instead of out there! Littlefoot reassures her that they can all push the boulder if they work together, and they all push!
It doesn't work at first, but then Ruby pushes with them from the other side, and it moves the boulder a bit, just enough for her to squeeze through the gap!
Ruby: "How did you know I was in there?"
Littlefoot: "We heard you yell! And Chomper knew just where you'd be!"
Ruby: "Oh, what more could I ask for than to ask for great friends like you?!"
Cera: "Well..."
Chomper: "... you could ask for a Star Day surprise!"
Ruby: "A Star Day surprise?! What a surprise!"
When they get back, Cera's Giving Circle is completely ruined.
The surprise was destroyed in the same rockslide that Ruby almost died from. It also destroyed most of the Sweet Bubbles, all that's left are three attached to the stem that Ducky manages to pull out. Ruby eats them while Chomper apologizes for her Star Day not being happy, but she insists she is happy. This leads into song 2 of the episode... a reprise of I Feel So Happy. Skip to 21:06 for the song.
Man, this episode almost stuck the landing. I even think this usage of the song is a bit better than the usage last episode, just because the episode around it is a lot better. But reusing the same song is just trite. Some lyrics are a bit different, but it really is just the same thing. It's not necessarily bad, just really underwhelming.
Later that night, The Gang are gazing at Ruby's Star Day star, next to the moon.
Ruby: "There it is, my Star Day star! You know, I may not be with my family, but I sure do feel at home!"
The others lean in toward her, and the episode ends on that happy note.
After last episode, I was starting to regret watching this show, but this episode turned that completely around. Even if the rest of the show sucks, it's all worth it for this episode.
"The Star Day Celebration" is overall fantastic. There are a couple missteps, though. I'm not a fan of the Not-So-Forgotten Birthday trope, but at least the usage of it here is relatively brief before the return of the Earthshake introduces some real drama. The Clubtail is gross, but his scene is pretty short, he's ultimately okay, and he references the Grapes of Luxury trope, which is a trope I do like. And reusing the same song as last episode is a fairly weak note to end on.
I was a little concerned about Ruby yelling for help, like she was gonna be a damsel in distress, but then she saved herself from falling AND she was the difference-maker when pushing the boulder, so no complaints there!
But the meat of the episode is Ruby's memories and the episode SELLS the hell out of those. Like, my gosh, the entire first half of this episode is just beautiful, wonderful heartache, executed marvelously. And major props go to Ruby's voice actress, Meghan Strange. I really bought those scenes where she was choking up from sadness and the hyperventilating line was scarily realistic. I'm genuinely stunned, and very impressed, that this show managed to get a powerful emotional reaction from me on par with movie 10.
You know, a positive, intentional one. 13 also got an extreme emotional reaction from me, but that one was negative and unintended.
Even though I maintain that The Cave of Many Voices was a poor way to introduce Chomper and Ruby to the group dynamic, I do really like how the first three episodes of the show focus so heavily on those two. The Cave of Many Voices focused on Chomper for the main plot and Ruby for the subplot, The Mysterious Tooth Crisis focused heavily on Chomper, and now The Star Day Celebration focused heavily on Ruby. While I really would have preferred to see them properly inducted into the Great Valley, this is a good way to flesh out these 2 characters and integrate them into The Gang early on.
And while The Mysterious Tooth Crisis kinda flopped in regards to connecting the audience to Chomper, we already knew him from 2 and 5. Ruby's a new character, so of the two episodes, The Star Day Celebration was the more important one to get right, and they got it RIGHT.
Pros: Ruby's flashbacks are fantastic and heartbreaking. The first song is fantastic and heartbreaking. The Earthshake drama was solid, both times.
Cons: Dumb cold open. I don't like the "Not-So-Forgotten Birthday" trope. The second song is weak, as an ending.
Rating: This episode was genuinely fantastic and I teared up multiple times. This episode gets a 9/10, and I mean that with all my heart.
The Land Before Time S1E2: The Mysterious Tooth Crisis
Last Time: With no proper introduction, Chomper needed a new cave and Ruby taught Ducky how to yell at other people. They found a new cave that echoed and Ducky used it to yell at other people. But that was too loud for Chomper, so he picked a much more boring cave to live in. Wuss.
The episode starts with another cold open. I guess that's standard for this show, which is a really weird contrast to how the movies always started with logos followed by a long intro and narrator explaining the very concept of dinosaurs before it slowly transitioned into focusing on the Great Valley dinosaurs.
The tv show is just like "y'all know what dinosaurs are, y'all know what this franchise is about, now what's up?"
This cold open sees the kids all running, Cera in the lead. Apparently, Tria has a surprise to show them, and Petrie suggests maybe she learned how to fly! This suggestion is so weird that it causes a pile-up.
It would be surprising. I guess.
They reach Tria and she explains the big surprise is that she's taking the kids to her favorite secret place in the Great Valley. The Gang are excited and ask what it is.
Tria: "It's my secret... mud-pool!"
The Gang: "Huh?????"
Cera (incredulous): "We're going to a mud-hole?!"
Then the intro starts.
My guess is that the secret mud-pool is like a spa. Like those mud-packs people get on their faces at spas. Or like pigs wallowing in mud to cool off and kill parasites.
When we come back, that does seem to be what this is. Cera is skeptical, but Tria explains.
Tria: "Oh, this mud is special. You'll understand when you sit in it."
Cera: "We're supposed to sit... in the mud??"
Tria: "Mmm, and just let yourself go..."
The Gang are split on the idea. Some are into it:
Ruby: "Oh, it might be nice to go and let myself go!"
Spike: "Hmmmmm!" *flops on the ground*
Some aren't. Petrie, Littlefoot, and Chomper work together to make up an excuse not to go, that being they were playing a game of "Stop the Seed" and they want to finish it.
Ducky thinks the mud might be nice, but Littlefoot and Chomper glare daggers at her to bend to peer pressure on this.
She bends and joins Littlefoot's group, while Ruby and Spike walk over to Tria.
Cera wants to join Littlefoot, but Topsy catches her trying to weasel her way out and he insists.
Topsy (whispering): "Tria put a lot of thought into this little trip, if you don't go, I'll never hear the end of it!"
Cera: "But daaaAAAAd!!!"
Topsy: "You're going!"
The others run off to have fun and Cera looks at them longingly. She reluctantly joins Ruby and Spike and Tria leads them off, walking through the Great Valley, past a swamp.
They arrive at a wall of reeds, and Tria uses her tail to pull back on them, revealing the secret mud-pool:
Looks kinda nice to me. Ruby thinks it looks nice too.
Spike walks in and is initially surprised by how it feels, but then relaxes.
Cera: "It's. Just. Mud."
Tria sighs and rolls her eyes.
With the other group, they're kicking and headbutting a pinecone around. Petrie and Littlefoot both go for it and collide, then Chomper does a diving bite at it and...
Loses a tooth on it. Ah, so that's what the title of the episode is referring to. Everyone gathers around and looks at the tooth on the ground, stunned. They comment that it looks like a tooth. Specifically Chomper's tooth, and Chomper freaks out and runs around.
Chomper: "My tooth, my tooth, MY TOOTH!"
Littlefoot: "Does it hurt?"
Chomper: "No. YOU THINK IT WILL?!?!"
Ducky: "I am sure it will all be okay."
Chomper: "Okay?! OKAY?! What's next?! An arm, a leg, my tail?! Not my tail! What's happening to meeee?!"
Petrie's never even heard of a tooth falling out, which does nothing to reassure Chomper. Topsy overhears all the yelling, and he has heard of this.
Topsy: "It starts with a tooth, and before you know it, a fella's turned into bones and falling to pieces!"
Chomper: "I don't wanna turn into bones!"
Topsy: "It isn't up to you! Mark my words, by nightfall you'll be nothin' but a pile of bones!"
He says this while walking away, but a smirk to the camera gives away that he's just bullshitting.
You racist old bastard! Tricking this poor Sharptooth child into thinking he will die of leprosy before the day's out! This is really mean, but I love how in-character it is.
Okay, so. Obviously the twist of this episode is gonna be that Sharpteeth kids shed their teeth naturally just like humans do, and apparently Flat-Teeth kids don't. That's why Ruby had to be separated, because she's the only one in the Great Valley who would know about it.
Now, I like dinosaurs, but I don't know enough about their dental anatomy to judge how biologically accurate this is. And I don't even know where I would begin to research whether some juvenile dinosaurs outgrew their teeth and others didn't, so I guess I'll just have to take the show at its word there. If anyone wants to provide corrections, please do so in the comments!
After Topsy leaves, Chomper's takeaway is that he needs to put the tooth back in his mouth.
Littlefoot: "We can ask Mr. Thicknose, he's heard of all sorts of things!"
Cut to them visiting Mr. Thicknose.
Mr. Thicknose: "You came to the right place, Chomper! I've heard of many ways to stick things together, no reason they wouldn't work on teeth."
I appreciate that they acknowledge the reveal in 8 by having them say Mr. Thicknose "has heard" about a lot of stuff. Not experienced them, just heard about them.
However, Mr. Thicknose's new VA is a terrible vocal match. Dorian Harewood sounds nothing like Robert Guillaume. What, was Robert not available to reprise his role? He's deceased now, but he was alive when this show was running. That's a real shame, Robert Guillaume's voice was one of the things giving Mr. Thicknose even an ounce of dignity, and it was a big part of what sold The Lesson as a song. I do have to give them props for not white-washing Mr. Thicknose. Dorian may not sound like Robert but he is at least a black man, they kept that intact.
Mr. Thicknose going into dentistry starts song 1 of the episode: Fix Your Tooth. There's no individual upload of the song, so just skip to 6:10 in the full episode:
Um. This is just Talking Big again. Not in lyrics, but the music is exactly the same. What do I do? Do I rate this as a standalone song, or rate it lower for the laziness of re-using the music?
Looking it up, apparently a lot of the songs in the tv show reuse music from other songs. That's disappointing. I guess since it's so common I'll overlook it for this one, but this does downgrade the entire show in my opinion. Makes the songs feel a lot more like an obligation than a deliberate element to enhance the story.
Seriously, comparing this song to The Lesson is like night and day. The Lesson was long and soulful and nuanced. It was actually trying to be a good song and tell a story with a good message. This is just... lame.
He tries to reattach Chomper's tooth with sap, then pollen (which sounds like a TERRIBLE idea), then mud (an EVEN WORSE idea). Thankfully Chomper doesn't even try the mud one, and then Thicknose just gives up. Just like that. I kinda like that it ends in failure, but it's too abrupt. I guess the rest of the kids singing along is kinda fun, but they don't add anything, they're just repeating what Thicknose says. And the animation is okay in places, but really bad in other places. And frankly, I thought the music was bad in Talking Big, and it's bad here, too!
After the song, Thicknose apologizes.
Mr. Thicknose: "I am sorry none of my sticky solutions worked. Until today, I've always tried to avoid direct experience with... Sharptooth teeth."
Yeah, we know. The only experience you've ever had with Sharpteeth in your life was in 8.
Thicknose leaves, having accomplished nothing. Chomper laments that there are no Sharpteeth in the Great Valley, because they might know what's going on. Littlefoot realizes Ruby is here, and Chomper points out that she doesn't even HAVE teeth (true, but neither should Cera, Ducky, or Petrie, and they grow teeth randomly all the time). Littlefoot says that since she grew up in the Mysterious Beyond, she might still know what's going on.
Honestly, I'm glad they brought this up this soon, I thought it would take a lot longer for them to think of asking Ruby about this.
Unfortunately, the Secret Mud-Pool is secret, so they don't know where Ruby is right now, and they have to find her before nightfall when Chomper falls apart! Petrie suggests Chomper track them by scent.
Over at the Secret Mud-Pool, everyone is relaxing in the mud, except Cera who refuses to participate.
With Littlefoot's party, they're following Chomper's nose, Littlefoot confident he has the scent. Chomper seems uncertain, and points them toward a dark and menacing cave. Petrie asks if he's sure Tria went in there and he insists, so they follow him in.
The kids walk through the cave, skeptical that someone would relax in here. Petrie gets stung by a bee (I guess he's either too small for it to get stuck or it's more of a wasp) and it chases him! Chomper excitedly bites down on it!
It flies around in his mouth and stings him!
Chomper: *spits it out* "YOW!" *licks lips* "Mmmm, spicy!"
Good continuity. Chomper liked the nest of spicy buzzing insects last episode, too.
The bee flies off, then comes back with a whole swarm, and the kids run for it!
Over with the Mud-Pool, Cera is bored playing with a rock, and she laments that she could be having fun with the others right now.
Right now, the others are running from a swarm of angry bees! They take a right to hide in a small side path, and for some reason the Stinging Buzzers just fly past. Chomper steps back and trips into a huge skeleton!
For some reason, the skeleton freaks the kids out enough to scream and run from it back into the main tunnel, which attracts the bees again and they run screaming out of the entrance, still followed by the bees!
The character art in this episode is REALLY janky. Like, a pretty big step down from even last episode, much less the movies.
They escape the bees by jumping down into some bushes, and the bees fly overhead (at least those bees are consistent in losing track of their target easily). Chomper mentions the skeleton, how all of its teeth were gone! Littlefoot tells him to keep up hope that they can find Ruby, and Chomper points out that his nose failed, leading them into the cave. Then he freaks out that that means the next thing to fall off will be his nose!
Then, Littlefoot gets an idea! Grandpa told him about the Looking Rock, where you can see the whole Great Valley from the peak, so they'll climb that!
This is a new location that has never been mentioned before. And I'm not sure the plan tracks. If they're high enough to see the whole Great Valley, they'd surely be too high to spot Ruby or Tria, right?
Later, they're climbing it, and Petrie flies up to inform them they're near the top!
Wait. Why didn't Petrie just fly up to look for them by himself? Why do the rest need to do anything? It's a big mud-pool out in the open, and Petrie flew all over the Great Valley in 12. Why can't he just fly up and look around? The whole plot just fell apart instantly.
Ducky slips and Chomper catches her before she falls! But then Chomper slips and barely catches himself on a root!
The little white dot on the edge is Chomper's tooth, he's been holding onto it the whole time (convinced that putting it back in his mouth will fix him) and lost his grip on it. Chomper tries to reach for his tooth and the others discourage him. The reaching breaks the root, and Littlefoot whips his tail down for Chomper to grab onto!
But some pebbles fall from the root and one hits the tooth, knocking it down! The tooth falls into a cloud, but Petrie dives down like a missile after it! Littlefoot helps Chomper up and then Petrie flies back, having caught the tooth!
The others praise Petrie, and Ducky points out he flew into Sky Puffies to catch it. Petrie didn't even realize, and is startled by himself.
They keep climbing, and reach the top of the Looking Rock. From there, Chomper spots the Mud-Pool, just past the Murky Swamp.
They're just... assuming that's the right one. It is, but they've never been there, they wouldn't know that. And again, Petrie could have just flown up and seen this, this whole mini-adventure was completely unnecessary.
And for some reason, there's an error when Chomper points it out, the camera zooms in on the waterfall to the left of the mud-pool instead of the mud-pool itself.
Over with the mud-pool, Cera's still pouting and bored. Tria tells her to just try dipping a toe in. Cera finally relents and is surprised to find that it's warm, which Ruby explains is what makes it relaxing. Cera's still not interested and walks back up, but then her mud-covered foot slips and she slides down the rock and off it like a ramp into the mud! She surfaces and they laugh at her.
Cera: "This is supposed to make me relax?!"
Tria: "Now that you're in, doesn't it feel good?"
Cera (dryly): "Well, it's better than usual mud..."
Spike: "Mm-hmm!"
They laugh again and Cera joins them.
The rest of The Gang walk through the Murky Swamp, complaining about how bad it smells.
Chomper then missteps into a pool of Sinking Sand! He starts sinking down! Petrie tries to pull him out but he's not strong enough, and when Littlefoot offers his tail, Chomper has to decide whether to let go of Petrie or his tooth!
Chomper chooses to let go of Petrie and grab Littlefoot's tail with that hand. Littlefoot tries to pull him up, but one weak little Sharptooth arm isn't enough, he needs to use both hands!
Littlefoot: "C'mon, c'mon!"
Chomper: "I can't, I'd lose my tooth!"
Ducky: "One tooth is not worth a whole you!"
Chomper: "But I can't be a Sharptooth without my sharp tooth!"
Petrie: "Oh, me not think of that!"
Petrie swoops down and grabs the stupid tooth out of Chomper's hand so Littlefoot can pull him to safety grabs onto Littlefoot's tail and helps pull.
But that's not enough! Chomper sinks down under the surface! Littlefoot dips his tail down and fishes around for him, and finally Chomper grabs with both hands and is pulled out!
Safely on shore, the others are happy he's okay, but Chomper has fallen into despair. He looks at the sinking sand and sulks.
Chomper: "I'm not okay. My tooth is gone forever. How can I be a Sharptooth without teeth?"
Ducky: "It does not matter to us if you have sharp teeth or no teeth."
Littlefoot: "That's right! You'll always be our friend Chomper, no matter what!"
Chomper: "But what if Mr. Threehorn's right and I turn into bones?!"
He sits down on the edge and just stares into the sinking sand.
Littlefoot suggests they should still find Ruby, but Ducky points out that Chomper doesn't want to leave his tooth. Petrie offers to stay with Chomper while the other two go retrieve Ruby.
Littlefoot and Ducky make it to the Mud-Pool, and Ducky approaches this absolute diva relaxing in the mud to ask her for directions.
Ducky: "Uh, excuse me? Have you seen a Fast Runner with a Spiketail and two Threehorns."
Cera (lazily): "Ohhhhh, hiiii guuuuuysssss! What are yoouu doing heeeere?"
Ducky: "... Cera?! It is you?!"
Cera being so relaxed she sounds high is a classic cartoon trope, but it's good here. It's funny to hear her acting so out-of-character. Also, apparently Ruby is a Fast Runner.
Littlefoot tells her they need to find Ruby, and she strolls out of the mud and tells them to follow her, tail swishing behind as she walks.
Cera (melodically): "Here we aaaaarree!"
Ruby's lounging on the shore while Spike is still wallowing and Tria is washing off under a waterfall.
Ducky: "We have been looking for you all day, yup yup yup!"
Ruby: "Ahh, I'm right here. Of course, I'm always 'here', since 'here' is wherever I am."
Littlefoot: "Chomper needs your help!"
That gets their attention! Littlefoot and Ducky run away and tell everyone to follow them!
Cera: "You guys reeeeeally need to relax."
They all follow anyway. Ruby asks Chomper what's wrong and he says his tooth is gone, forever!
Cera: "...WHAT?! You interrupted our relaxing day for a TOOTH?! A TOOTH?! ONE DAY I TRY TO RELAX, YOU GUYS COME OUT HERE AND SPOIL MY-"
Tria: "Now, now. We're just glad Chomper's not seriously hurt."
I'm on Cera's side here, but Chomper thinks Tria's under-reacting.
Chomper: "Not hurt?! I'm falling apart! Have you ever seen a Sharptooth with a missing tooth?!"
Ruby: "Oh yes. I've seen it more times than I care to see."
Chomper: *gasp* "Really???"
Ruby: "Why sure, Chomper! You're going to lose all your teeth!"
Chomper: "All of them?! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"
Ruby: "Normal Sharpteeth normally lose their teeth, so if you lost your tooth, you're a normal Sharptooth!
Chomper: "I'm... normal?"
Ruby: "Here, give me your claw."
Ruby: "Feel that? That's your new tooth."
Chomper: "New tooth?!"
Ruby: "Yes, new tooth. And this new tooth will be new until you're old!"
Chomper is overjoyed at this news, so much so that he jumps into song 2 of the episode: I Feel So Happy. This song actually does have an individual upload (not on the official channel, but it's got decent enough quality).
Maybe my standards have been lowered by the other songs I've seen in this show, but despite this song being really short I think it's okay. Decent. Not bad. It's cute and upbeat. Petrie being scared and Cera being weirded out at the start adds a nice dose of cynicism to keep the song from being too overly saccharine, and I like the Bright Circle (Great Circle? they keep going back and forth which term they use) symbolism. It's on-the-nose and simple, but fine overall.
After the song, everyone is back to relaxing in the Mud-Pool, and Littlefoot's group has joined them.
Chomper asks Ducky if she can see his new tooth, scaring her a little.
He then asks Spike, and Spike shakes his head 'no'.
Cera: "First they're excited by some mud, and then a tooth, now they're excited about the mud again..."
She gets hit in the face by a mudball, courtesy of Spike, who tail-whipped it at her! He chuckles, and she jumps into the mud, creating a huge splash that covers Spike. They laugh and play in the mud, and that's where the episode ends.
This episode... was not good.
The writing in this episode is atrocious. I'm not even complaining about the central conflict, it kinda makes sense Chomper would freak out about this thing he doesn't know about, and Topsy messing with him makes it make more sense. And that smirk lets the audience in on there being no real threat, creating dramatic irony. The premise of the episode is flimsy, but fine.
No, I'm complaining about the fact that almost the whole plot could have been skipped if the writers had used Petrie properly. The bee cave was completely pointless and the Looking Rock hike was completely pointless. Petrie could have just flown up and seen where the Mud-Pool was at any time. And then Chomper almost drowning, losing the stupid tooth, and falling into despair was completely pointless! Petrie could have just grabbed it and Chomper could have been pulled up at any time, then he would have kept the tooth and not been depressed.
Like, this episode would have worked better if they just had Petrie go to the spa and had Cera stay behind. But no, because Petrie was present for this adventure, the episode is just absolutely FULL of plotholes. Or alternatively, have them not think of Ruby after Mr. Thicknose, instead they leave the Great Valley to find some friendly Sharpteeth to help Chomper, then have to run from Red Claw. That would at least be more adventurous.
Also, the scene with Chomper in the Sinking Sand is just a blatant rip-off of the scene from 3 with Hyp in the Tar Pit, even down to him going under and then being pulled out from under the surface.
The mud spa day subplot was honestly fine. No complaints there. Tria having this secret place is a little odd since she only got to the Great Valley in 11, but maybe she found it since then. But her relaxing makes sense for the character. Spike relaxing makes a LOT of sense. Ruby relaxing is fine. She's a new character, we don't have a firm grasp on her personality yet. But as the mature and responsible one of... at least Chomper, if not the whole group, it makes sense she'd have some stress to release. And Cera not wanting to relax but getting super into it once she did was both a genuinely funny gag and a good angle for her character.
I was a bit disappointed that Ducky wanting to go to the mud-pool and being peer pressured out of it didn't come back. And they didn't explain why Chomper thought the bee cave smelled like Tria, that was weird.
The ending is also pretty decent. The dialogue writing in the last scene is solid, and the song is the best song so far in the whole series (still mediocre, but hey, grading on a curve, it's good).
The animation is a step down in this episode, even compared to the previous one. Especially on Littlefoot, his design has been smoothed out to a ridiculous degree, he barely even looks like himself.
Finally, how much you wanna bet Chomper losing teeth is never gonna come up again in this show? Too common in these episodic shows, something minor is established that should continue to be an element, but is completely forgotten about in future episodes. I'd be shocked if future episodes actually followed through on Chomper gradually losing all of his baby teeth and then growing his adult teeth.
Pros: Good subplot. Decent ending. Decent ending song. Topsy's racism as the trigger for the plot was funny.
Cons: Main plot was a meandering waste of time. Pointless Thicknose cameo with a bad song. General lack of tension for most of it.
Rating: 3/10. This episode had some good in it, but lower high notes than S1E1, and the plot was a lot flimsier.
The Land Before Time S1E1: The Cave of Many Voices
Last Time: After 13 movies of adventures, The Gang finally had a movie so bad it killed the franchise, and it had to change to a tv show model to pay off the many, MANY promised follow-ups from previous films.
...is what I'd like to say, except reality doesn't really support that narrative. 13 and the tv show went into production around the same time, and 13 actually released between seasons 1 and 2 of the tv show (though it still does canonically take place beforehand). 13 being bad had no influence on the tv show being made. Though it might have had an influence on the show not getting a third season.
This Time: I'll be tackling the tv show one episode at a time, so the reviews will be shorter, since one episode of the show is just under 1/3rd the length of one of the movies. Probably with more densely packed images, since I still have the same 30-image limit.
Also, if you want to watch along, I think all of the episodes are available for free on the official Youtube channel (that's where I'm watching them, anyway). I'm not sure if all the songs have separate uploads, so I might just link the full episode and specify the timestamp the song is at.
We open with no credits, no logos, not even a narrator to introduce the concept of dinosaurs. Just jumping straight into a cold open.
It's nighttime in the Great Valley, and it starts raining. We cut around to see all of The Gang reacting with their families.
Littlefoot: "Aw, Sky-Water! Oh, now I'll never get to sleep."
Grandma nuzzles him to make him feel better.
Tricia shivers and Cera reassures her that it's okay.
Petrie flies back to his nest carrying a large leaf as cover from the rain, but it's filled with water. He flies into a stalactite and dumps it as he falls, soaking his siblings and annoying them as the leaf floats down on top of them.
And apparently between movie 12 and now, Petrie has lost two siblings.
Ducky points out to Spike that the Sky-Water is making the Ground-Water dance.
And her sisters are absent, but that makes sense, they usually sleep separate from these two.
And in a hidden cave high up in the Great Wall, two other characters are also experiencing the Sky-Water.
Chomper: "Wow, Ruby, there sure is a lot of Sky-Water coming down!"
Ruby: "That's Sky-Water, Chomper, it just keeps coming down until it doesn't!" *shrug*
They head inside the cave.
Ruby: "Well, at least the Secret Caverns keep us safe from Red-Claw, which is good since I promised your mom and dad I'd keep us safe from Red-Claw."
Chomper: "Yeah, and tonight they're keeping us dry, too!"
Chomper then gets dripped on. The stalactites (called Stone Teeth) are leaking water on them. Chomper gets annoyed with it and he climbs up on a rock to plug the hole with his finger, which only makes the water flow down his body. The tip pops off the stalactite and water shoots down like a faucet onto him.
Ruby tells him to calm down, but Chomper flies into a rage, biting off the tip of that stalactite, drop kicking another one, and donkey kicking a third.
Which only makes more water flow through. He then slips and lands in a large puddle. The cave is now flooded an inch deep.
"Chomper: "Huh?! Oh nooo! Mmm... uhh... Now I'll never get to sleep."
Then the intro starts, but before that, let's talk about Ruby. Ruby is a new character introduced in this show, an Oviraptor kid. To contrast Chomper being young and immature, Ruby is older and a know-it-all. And her speech pattern is circular, her sentences usually end where they begin. I thought she was a pretty good addition, but that's based on my memory of watching a few episodes over a decade ago.
Ruby is voiced by Meghan Strange. Chomper is voiced by Max Burkholder, who does a decent impression of Cannon Young's Chomper from 5.
Now for the intro:
It's pretty decent, actually. I like how the intro basically speedruns a typical Land Before Time adventure in 30 seconds. Running and playing in the Great Valley, leaving to the Mysterious Beyond, running into a group of Sharpteeth, getting trapped on a rock floating on lava, then riding a log in a river before returning home and playing ball with a pinecone.
And the lyrics actually track with the visuals. I really like the audio synching with the roar and the lightning at the break in the lyrics, then the rock breaks up for the "ohhhh" bit, and then the "streams to follow all the way home" lyric transitions from a lava stream to a water stream to them back home in the Great Valley. It's a short intro, but it's very economical with its time.
Yeah, I was kinda meh on this intro at first, but the more I break it down, the more I like how efficient it is. I like how the lava is simultaneously saving them from the Sharpteeth and more dangerous than them, escalating the danger level before the lightning does a match cut to them floating on a log, deescalating the danger level to ease the audience back into the safety of the Great Valley. And then the pinecone scene shows off 4/7 of the main characters' specialties: Chomper kicking, Cera headbutting, Littlefoot tail-whipping, and Spike... eating.
This is a great intro. It think it would be better if it was like, a minute long and had more parent cameos at the start and more adventure cliches in the middle (like having a classic "crossing the chasm" scene), but overall, it's surprisingly solid.
The next day, The Gang are eating Tree Stars, complaining about the rain making everything drippy and soggy.
Two Pachycephalosaurus kids run past Ducky, stealing the tree stars she was about to eat! She chases them and yells, but they ignore her! Ruby, who is in a nearby pond eating a clam (whole! she just eats the whole clam, shell and all!) overhears. Ruby yells at them and they look terrified, dropping the tree stars before running away.
Ducky: "Thank you, Ruby! Your big voice scareded those Domeheads, it did!"
Ruby: "Thank you for the 'thank you', Ducky!"
Oh yeah, it was Ruby's voice that did it. I'm sure it had nothing to do with her being a terrifying Sharptooth.
Ducky offers her a Tree Star and Ruby politely eats it while gagging. They walk back to the group, and Ruby utters her catchphrase:
Ruby: "Hello my friends, my friends hello!"
Everyone says "hi" to Ruby and then Chomper walks out of a bush, very sleepy. Littlefoot asks him what's wrong and he says they need to find a new cave.
Hang on, THEY ALL KNOW?! Seriously, the very first episode of the tv show isn't even going to BOTHER setting up the entire premise?! I just assumed they were living in those caves in secret, but nope! It's just like "yeah, two Sharpteeth kids have moved into the Great Valley, everyone knows about it and is cool with them". Like, I feel like this entire thing on its own would have made a much better premise for the first episode!
Ducky: "There is always something wrong with Chomper's cave, yup yup yup!"
Chomper: "Not always! Ruby and me are really happy your families let us stay in the Secret Caverns!"
Ruby: "Mm-hmm, especially with Red Claw and his Fast Biters scaring everyone in the Mysterious Beyond!"
Cera: "Okay, so what's wrong with your cave this time?!"
Chomper: "It's leaky."
They leave to go see what's up with the cave.
Okay, so they do TRY and explain the backstory here. In two lines of dialogue. Again, I REALLY feel that this backstory would have been much better as a first episode by itself. Like, we didn't even get to see The Gang meeting Ruby for the first time, or see the circumstances where Ruby had to make that promise to Chomper's parents. Or any discourse between the adults regarding the two Sharpteeth kids!
In the cave, Chomper explains that it started leaking due to the rain last night. Ducky admits she wasn't able to sleep last night due to the dripping sound, too, and Ruby mentions it wasn't as bad before Chomper made those holes in the ceiling.
Chomper: "Uhh... yeah. So, I thought we could go exploring and look for a new cave!"
Littlefoot is unsure, but Chomper suggests it could be an adventure, and that keyword triggers The Gang like The Manchurian Candidate to go along with him. Chomper also sings song 1 of the episode, a reprise of Adventuring from 10.
And yeah, I'm not gonna be able to find all of the songs uploaded individually. At least not with decent quality. Just skip to 5:28 in the full episode for the song.
Eh, it's quite a bit weaker than the original. Only a minute long, so it's already less substantial.
I appreciate they kept the imagination sequences but they're a lot more toned down. And instead of Cera egging them on, she just dismisses them, which isn't nearly as fun or mean. I guess the "funny rocks" (which look alarmingly like eggs) and waterfall are kinda nice as far as scenery goes, but obviously the animation is a huge step down from the movies.
And the last bit copied from the original doesn't work in the new context. In the original, they wanted to go on the adventure and it worked because the whole song was hypothetical. In this one, they've already gone through 4 rooms when they say they want to go. Like, the adventure has already started, you can't say you want to join the expedition 4 rooms deep!
After the song, they come across a split in the cave system. The left side has fresher air, but it's too dark to see, while the right side is bright enough to see. There's some debate over which way to go.
Ducky thinks they should go the way that's brighter, and then Spike spots that vine hanging down and starts munching on it, pulling some rocks out of the ceiling and shining a sunbeam down the left path. Everyone praises Spike, and then Ruby declares "going the way we can see will let us see the way we're going!" like it's some wise statement. They decide to go the left path, and Ducky pulls Ruby aside.
Ducky: "Ruby? You said what I said, but biggerer, and everyone listened! If I could talk big, everyone would listen to me, too! That would be good!"
Ruby: "Oh-ho, as long as the big isn't so big that you scare everyone!"
Ducky: "Like Red Claw?"
Ruby: "Yeah, like Red Claw."
Feels like a little bit of a retread of the "Mad Song" subplot from 8, except this is a bit better conceptually because that was full-on pretending that Ducky has never been angry in her life, while this is more just acknowledging that Ducky is soft-spoken. Which is true, though usually people do listen when she talks. And I'm not sure whether or not the show is pulling my leg in regards to Ruby proclaiming really obvious shit in a way that impresses others.
After the mention of Red Claw, the camera pans back to the sunhole in the wall Spike opened up, which leads out into the Mysterious Beyond. Outside, we see a family of small Sharpteeth, a parent and two kids, playing in a pool of water. Then Red Claw and his Fast Biters (the three Sharpteeth in the intro) show up and roar to chase them away!
The Fast Biters drink up while Red Claw sniffs the air, turning his head toward the hole and narrowing his eyes.
Back with The Gang, they're exploring a section with a ton of branching paths. They each come back from one.
Ruby: "This cave is too small."
Ducky: "And this cave floor is too bumpy."
Petrie: "This cave smell funny."
Spike: *sniff sniff* "Urggh..."
Littlefoot: "Don't give up yet, I'm sure we can find a good cave!"
Cera (covered in dust): "Good cave?!" *cough* "I don't think there is such a thing!" *she shakes the dust off*
Chomper: "Hey guys, you have to see this!"
Chomper leads the others through a crack in the wall into a huge cave!
This is the titular "Cave of Many Voices" in that it is a cave which echoes a lot. Chomper yells "Hello" and it echoes. Despite the cool design of the cave, though, they don't do anything interesting or unique with the echo, it's just a regular echo effect. Seems like a shame, they could have done some cool stuff with sound design here.
Ducky yells a "HAWOOGA" loud enough that it startles Petrie and impresses Littlefoot and Cera (even though it wasn't really THAT loud, the VA doesn't actually yell for the line).
Ducky: "Oh, I sound big now! Yes yes yes! If I can talk big in here, Ruby, can you show me how to talk big in the Great Valley?"
Ruby: "You just think I talk big because I'm bigger than you, but if you were bigger than you, you'd talk bigger, too."
Ducky: "Huh?"
Ruby: "But then, you wouldn't be big to you..."
Ruby tends to get lost in semantics, confusing herself. Ducky asks her to try helping anyway, and Ruby capitulates. Everyone has fun making echo sounds, but the sound carries through a hole in the wall... which is somehow the same hole Spike made in the other room.
Goddamnit, continuity guys. They went through like two tunnels between the two rooms, that CAN'T be the same hole! We had this same issue in Movie 11, where the Tinysaurus cave system had the entrance hole appear in a completely separate room.
Red Claw sniffs again and roars to alert the Fast Biters and order them to check out the hole.
With The Gang, Littlefoot's getting thirsty and Chomper's getting hungry. Cera tells him she's off the menu, and the others laugh!
Cera has been accusing Chomper of wanting to eat her since day 1, and she hasn't let up since. I guess he did bite her the one time, but that was a very long time ago, and he looks sad every time she accuses him of this. Kinda fucked up that Ruby's laughing, too. Petrie's flying over because he's got an alternate suggestion: a nest of stinky bugs in the Great Valley that Chomper could eat. He thinks that sounds good and they leave the cave.
Back in the Mysterious Beyond, the Fast Biters can't quite fit in the hole, so Red Claw yells at them and then demonstrates how to gouge the hole out with his foot.
Red Claw then backs off and leaves it to his Fast Biters to double team the hole, spreading it until they can all fit inside.
The Gang are back in the Great Valley. Chomper thanks Petrie for showing him that nest, the stinky bugs were spicy but good. Petrie is unnerved but says "you're welcome" anyway. Chomper wants to get back to exploring but Spike and Cera are still eating leaves.
Chomper (annoyed): "You Flat-Teeth suuuure take a long time to eat!"
Hmm. That's new. We've never heard the term "Flat-Teeth" before. Interesting that we're seeing the "Sharptooth" racism from the opposite angle now.
Littlefoot suggests Chomper go ahead, they'll catch up, and he leaves, excited to get back to adventuring. Ruby and Ducky are talking separate from the group, and Ruby suggests if Ducky thinks big thoughts, it could make her feel big inside and talk big. Ducky points out a large tree and Ruby tells her to pretend that she's as big as that tree. This leads into song 2 of the episode, Talking Big.
Another song that doesn't have a standalone upload. Skip to 12:48 in the episode.
This song sucks. It's not, like, offensively terrible. But it's REALLY shallow and derivative.
It's just The Mad Song again: Ducky being taught how to be more assertive when that's not usually a problem she has, but Talking Big doesn't have any bite. To be fair, The Mad Song had way too much bite, that was one of my big problems with it. But this is SO shallow and simple, the lyrics don't go anywhere or expand on anything, it's just repeating the same idea over and over. There's no complexity, this feels like a Sesame Street song. At least The Mad Song went into how suppressing emotions is bad for you.
I guess the Saurus Rock call-out is a cool continuity nod, and the animation here is honestly a lot better than it has been in the rest of the episode so far (and better than the deranged over-animation in The Mad Song). It's also a decent debut song for Ruby's character, since she's meant to be the mature and smart one, a teaching song fits her. But it's still a limp noodle of a song.
Also, the whole "Ruby talks big" thing really doesn't hit for me. It's like Katy Perry's Roar, which talks a big game and even compares itself to Eye of The Tiger, but then the song has no punch. The whole thing has less impact than the first note of Eye of the Tiger. Like, Ruby really isn't projecting her voice as much as the script suggests she is. They really needed to let the voice actress be LOUD if they were going to go this route. But she's not, she talks at a pretty normal volume.
They return to the group and Ducky introduces herself with Ruby's catchphrase, confusing the others. She's trying to talk big, by avoiding her usual speech patterns and copying Ruby's. Which is obviously NOT the point. Chomper returns and excitedly tells them he found a new cave to live in!
Wait, I thought we had settled on the Cave of Many Voices? This new one's gotta be REALLY cool to overshadow the cave the episode is named after!
It's underwhelming. Everyone else thinks so, too. The thing Chomper is happiest about is the lack of Stone Teeth, which the kids share a hearty laugh over (I've been noticing that a lot this episode, I hope this "in-universe laugh track" doesn't become a trend).
Over at the hole, the Fast Biters have widened it enough for Red Claw to squeeze in, and he motions for them to follow.
One of the Fast Biters roars, and The Gang hear it. They creep forward to find out who made that noise. They see the hole from a ledge above, and it's gaping wide now. Then they look down and see Red Claw and the Fast Biters!
Chomper is the one who recognizes Red Claw, so it's not clear if any of the Flat-Teeth kids have seen him before. The kids sneak away to warn everyone else, but Ducky blows their cover stupidly.
Ducky (loud): "We cannot let those Sharpteeth stay in here, no no no!"
Red Claw: *inquisitive growl*
Cera (whispering): "Don't talk big now, Ducky! WOAH!"
Because she was scolding Ducky, Cera wasn't watching where she was walking and she slips off the ledge! Littlefoot and Chomper try to pull her up, but they can't and all three slide down the ledge too, right toward the Sharpteeth!
Red Claw approaches, and the kids run! Spike bites and pulls another vine to knock down a bunch of boulders! One hits Red Claw in the head and stuns him enough for the kids to regroup and keep running!
Red Claw roars at the Fast Biters and they chase after the kids, living up to their name, they are fast! The Gang barely manage to slip through a small crack in the wall before the Fast Biters catch up!
Walking through a tunnel, the kids discuss how they're going to keep these Sharpteeth from getting into the Great Valley. Littlefoot decides they'll just have to make them leave the same way they came in, through the gaping hole. Spike motions toward a hanging vine and makes tugging gestures and Littlefoot gets it: after they leave, the kids will yank some vines out to make rocks plug the hole.
At the end of this tunnel, the Fast Biters ambush them, having circled around to the front hole since they couldn't fit in the crack in the rear!
Chomper leads The Gang down a bottom hole in the ground!
The Gang slide down a long and narrow tunnel, which is again too tight for the Fast Biters to squeeze into.
They slide down the tunnel quite a ways and at the bottom, Littlefoot lands first and then everyone else but Cera lands on top of him (though Chomper and Ducky bounce off).
I'm surprised Spike didn't break Ruby. She may be bigger than him, but she's built like a twig while he's built like a tank.
This new cave has a pool of water, and they walk while discussing plans. Chomper suggests he and Ruby hold off Red Claw, but Cera points out they'd just be an appetizer and Littlefoot insists they need to stick together. Ducky wishes the Cave of Many Voices could make their bodies as big as their voices sound, and Littlefoot realizes that's the solution! It scared Petrie, so it should scare Red Claw, too, right?
Petrie: "Um, we roar like we big and angry?"
Cera (smug): "No problem!"
Petrie: "Not problem for you."
They walk upward through a hallway and then Red Claw suddenly bursts through of the wall like Jack in The Shining!
HEEEEERE'S RED CLAW!
He smashes through the rest of the wall and chases them! While running away, the kids run into the Fast Biters! Trapped between two sets of sharp teeth, the kids hide behind this weird stone curtain thing, and the Sharpteeth run past each other and lose track of them.
Chomper says that Red Claw can't see them if they stay still which... has not be a thing for any other Sharpteeth before. Is it just because of that scar over his eye? Is that a Red Claw-specific thing, or are we now retconning the Jurassic Park inaccuracies into this franchise? Because if we are, the same should apply to Chomper.
Cera points out that he can still smell them, and he is indeed sniffing the air and slowly getting closer. Ducky climbs to the top of the rock curtain and realizes they're right near the Cave of Many Voices, it's just behind Red Claw and his Fast Biters! Ruby points out they'd see them, but Ducky says that since she's small, she might be able to sneak past (seems like Petrie could, too, especially if he tried to flit overhead between the stalactites).
But whatever, this is Ducky's moment. She slides down the rock certain, then creeps forward to hide behind a rock near the Sharpteeth, and then just runs right past their feet without being noticed at all.
That's a Nat 1 on Perception.
Ducky makes it past and into the Cave of Many Voices. By sniffing, Red Claw narrows in on the Gang's location, when Ducky repeats her earlier "HAWOOGA", distracting and alarming him! She lets out a few more "HAWOOGA"s, confusing the Sharpteeth and they look upward for the source of the sound. The Gang take this opportunity to run past the Sharpteeth into the cave themselves.
They congratulate Ducky and then everyone starts roaring.
The roars are actually decent at first, but for some reason they re-use all the same voice lines like 5 times in a row (yes, that's not counting the echo, in total you hear the same voice lines like 20 times) and it gets lame and annoying real fast. Petrie sneaks over to the entrance to check and the Fast Biters get nervous at all the noise and run away, Red Claw roaring after them in annoyance. Petrie reports that the plan is working!
Littlefoot: "Chomper, you can speak Sharptooth, tell Red Claw to leave, because a big and angry herd is on its way!"
Chomper: "Okay! GRAWL GRAWAWA RARARA RAOWL RA RAWR RA ROAR RARARAR RAWR!!"
I take back what I was saying about the voice actors not being loud enough. Well, not really, that was still the case earlier. But Aria Noelle Curzon (Ducky's VA) fuckin' SCREAMS that last "Yup", with a full-on voice crack and everything. It's kinda sick! Definitely rivals Cera's big snow-shattering scream in 8. Similar cadence, too, like a female version of the Tarzan scream, wobbling in and out of the voice crack in a controlled manner.
If you want to check it out, Ducky's whole bit starts at 21:09.
And it scares off Red Claw!
Okay, so this whole strategy is really dumb. Loud noises sometimes work for scaring wild animals, but this episode has been pretty clear that Red Claw is fairly intelligent. I get it's what the whole episode has been building up to, but it feels like a cop-out to have The Gang scare off Red Claw and his Fast Biters without actually having a real fight scene. And it diminishes Red Claw's threat level quite a bit if Ducky can scare him off.
That said, the execution on this dumb idea is GOOD. Incorporating Chomper's ability to speak Sharptooth as a way to warn and bluff Red Claw is a really nice bit of writing that helps make the plan more believable. And Ducky's voice acting in this scene is genuinely impressive, especially that last big scream! The music is big and triumphant, which could feel melodramatic and unfitting, but Ducky sells it. If the production team really had to go with this dumb idea, they made it work about as well as they could have.
After Red Claw runs off, Littlefoot remembers that they need to plug the hole. They run over to the hole and pull on some convenient vines that were definitely not there earlier to drop a big rock down, slamming a plug into that gaping hole once and for all!
Afterward, Chomper's happy to have his new cave, safe from Red Claw. Littlefoot credits Ducky and Petrie adds on that they wouldn't have made it in the Cave of Many Voices without Ducky sneaking in first. Spike agrees vocally, and all the other kids nod their heads.
Ducky: "Sometimes, being little is better than talking big, but I know I will always be big, in here."
Ruby: "Yup yup yup!"
Everyone laughs and that's where the episode ends.
So, is Ducky motioning to her heart or her lungs? Because the heart is the obvious cliche, but the lungs honestly make more sense here, what with all the yelling and all.
I have mixed feelings on this episode. The last third, with the Red Claw chase and screaming finale, is honestly good, ranging from a 7-8/10. It's dumb in concept, but the execution is strong. But the rest of the episode is kinda weak, ranging from 3-4/10.
As a standalone episode, it's not TOO bad. As the first episode of the series, though, it could be a lot better. It doesn't set up any of the status quo changes, they just happen off-screen and are explained in a few quick lines of exposition. Ruby and Chomper are just here now, and everyone knows them. I really wish there was a "pilot" episode so we could see The Gang meeting Ruby for the first time.
The songs are both diet retreads of previous songs in a way, one directly and the other indirectly. I guess I do appreciate how one is a Chomper song and one is a Ruby song, and both demonstrate their characters.
I'm kinda surprised they went with the "evil boss exasperated by his two stupid henchmen" trope for Red Claw and the Fast Biters. Red Claw's design strikes me as more of a dumb bruiser, but he's definitely more intelligent and malicious than most other Sharpteeth we've seen so far in the franchise. As a villain, this is honestly a decent introduction to him, if Ducky scaring him off doesn't kill off too much of his villain cred. The Fast Biters are just dumb goons so far, not much depth there.
There's some interesting racism commentary here. Especially with that family of raptors Red Claw chased off, this is the most the franchise has ever portrayed Sharpteeth as just. People. And we even learn that Sharpteeth call herbivore dinosaurs Flat-Teeth. I was honestly worried this show would drop the racism theme entirely after 12 mostly ignored it, but that doesn't seem to be the case.
Pros: Chomper and Ruby both getting a song is good for establishing "the new kids". The chase sequence is good. Ducky's scream at the end is legendary. Red Claw has some decent characterization already. Good cold open, does a good job of introducing the cast. The Sharpteeth are humanized.
Cons: No set-up for the status quo change. Both songs are weak. Ducky's subplot isn't as bad as in 8, but it still doesn't fit. The central plot is kinda boring, most of the caves look the same. The acoustics of The Cave of Many Voices could have been SO much cooler. The hole's location is inconsistent.
Rating: I'll give this episode a 4/10, below average. It's not good, but it's not terrible. If it was the second episode of this show, it'd get a 5/10, but because it also does a bad job as a first episode, it gets dropped a point.
Last Time: Petrie trained exhaustively for his people's traditional rite of passage to become a man while Cera dealt with feeling the complex mix of love and jealousy that comes from having a new baby sister.
But you don't care about that! The star of the film is a racist and annoying stand-up comedian! He has amnesia, is a predator who hangs out with children, and makes terrible jokes constantly! You'll love wasting 20 minutes of your life on a pointless sleepwalking bit!
This Time: I've heard bad things about this one. I'm frightened.
Sorry this took so long. I got about 3/4ths of the way through and then I burnt out (partially from this film, partially from other stuff in my life). I took a break, then came back to it.
A day after this post, I will post a poll asking if I should review the TV show or skip to 14. So keep an eye out for that.
They don't play with the Universal logo this time, but I'm okay with that, since they did the thing last time. It just shows up like normal and then fades out.
... and then the movie fades in on a shot of the solar system, and zooms in on the Earth anyway. Seems like they could have integrated this into the Universal Logo fine.
Huh, that's not Pangaea, but it's not our present Earth, either. The landmasses are a little off, but I think this is setting the movie around 75 million years ago, or right near the end of the Cretaceous. That long island should be the Zagros Mountains of Iran, meaning the peninsula at the top is the North Caucasus region of Russia.
That top landmass is the one the camera zooms in on, meaning I guess The Land Before Time takes place in Russia? Or China/Mongolia, the camera tracks quite a ways. The Land Before Time takes place in North Asia. Or at least this intro segment does.
Narrator: "Our world has existed for billions of years, and has been home to many different types of creatures. All have faced unexpected challenges. And have had to develop their own kinds of wisdom to keep them safe. The dinosaurs of the Great Valley had to learn some lessons, too."
That was the shortest, shittiest narrator opening yet! I usually cut out half the narrator speech and just include the important bit, but this was so short I could include the whole thing!
We see Littlefoot and Grandma eating from trees.
Littlefoot eats the bottom leaf, then uses the Longneck Trick from 2 to bend the tree down so he can eat the top one, but when it does, it snaps back and launches him off. He shakes it off and then sees a fallen tree spanning a huge ravine, with leaves in the canopy on the other side. He walks across the tree halfway, then calls back to Grandma.
Littlefoot: "Hey, Grandma! Look at me!"
Grandma: "Littlefoot! Come down from there, that's quite a drop!"
Littlefoot: "But Grandma, there's still some Tree Stars on it!"
Grandma: "There are plenty of Tree Stars on this tree, dear."
Littlefoot: "But I can get these all by myself!"
Then the ground starts shaking and the log starts rolling side to side precariously, and Littlefoot falls off! Grandma runs over onto the tree and reaches down to catch him in her mouth, then deposits him on the ground.
But then the tree falls under Grandma's weight! She falls into the ravine! But she catches herself on the side! She manages to bite a root and pull to climb back up onto the ledge! Littlefoot asks if she's okay, and she reassures him that she's fine. He insists it would have been okay if not for the Earthshake, and she nuzzles him to make him feel better.
Then we cut from that to nighttime, where Grandpa, Grandma, and Littlefoot are all sleeping (wait, was that a dream? that would explain the weird vibe and dialogue). Littlefoot is having a nightmare! In his nightmare, Grandma catches herself on the ledge but there's no root to bite!! She reaches out to Littlefoot but he can't save her, and she falls to her death!!!
Littlefoot wakes up gasping for air, and Grandma is also awake. He calls out to her, and she reassures him that she's here. He tells her his dream and she reminds him that she didn't fall before, this was just a Sleep Story.
Oh. So the earlier scene WASN'T a dream. The way this was set up was confusing. So Littlefoot was just acting like an idiot for no reason and Grandma actually almost died. As a seasoned veteran of crossing chasms on makeshift bridges, he should know the dangers of them by now. However, I guess I have to give the movie props for going this dark, this early.
Littlefoot apologizes to Grandma for causing trouble.
Grandma: "I know, dear. But no-one knows what life is going to bring us before it happens. That's why we learn The Wisdoms."
Littlefoot: "Wisdoms? I remember them! ...what were they, again?"
Grandma: "Oh-hoho! Those are the ways of doing things which help us stay safe when the unexpected happens. Like this one: 'stay in a group'. I stayed near you, so I was able to help when you got into trouble. Your grandpa and I have tried to teach you The Wisdoms, although we may not have always called them that."
Littlefoot (determined): "Well, I want to remember all of them! Tell me The Wisdoms, Grandma!"
That's where the scene ends. So that "we may not have always called them that" is the movie's excuse to introduce this new concept and say it's always been around. I'm already rolling my eyes at the "after-school special" vibes of the lessons this movie promises to teach.
Littlefoot in this movie is voiced by Cody Arens, Logan Arens, and Anthony Skillman. Yup, three voices. I'm sure THAT'S a good sign! Y'all will probably only hear Anthony, since he's the singing voice. I think the voice I've heard so far is Cody and uh, I hate it! It's REALLY high-pitched, you'd never believe Cody was 14 here, he sounds like he's 7. I don't understand this obsession with constantly re-casting Littlefoot to sound like a kid. Cera, Ducky, and Petrie have had the same adult voice actors since 5, and they do a fine job. It's really jarring to hear Littlefoot's voice constantly changing.
The next day, the rest of The Gang is jumping across a rushing river on some rocks. Flying and swimming is off-limits, and Petrie flubs a jump and is carried away, barely climbing onto another rock! Cera shows off by doing a big jump of her own, but misses and falls in the water, also getting carried away! Littlefoot sees her flailing and tries to save her but she complains about him hurting her tail.
Littlefoot freaks out and demands the others help her, but she just stands up and walks back. This river is fast, but very shallow, and they're just pretending to be in danger as part of the game "Jump and Get Swept Away".
Littlefoot: "I think pretending to be in trouble is against The Wisdoms!"
Ducky: "What are 'Wisdoms'?"
Littlefoot: "They help you be safe, like 'stay in a group', or 'work together'!"
The others are confused.
Petrie: "Ohohoho! You mean 'The Say-Sos'!"
Littlefoot: "The what?"
Petrie: "'The Say-Sos'! Mom tell me to do those things 'cause 'she say so'!"
The after-school special vibes are INTENSIFYING!
This leads into song 1 of the movie (what, ALREADY?!): Say So.
Sorry about the bad quality, for some reason the official upload of this song only has the first bit.
This song fucking sucks. The tone and singing is annoying, the lyrics are basic, boring, and repetitive.
It sets up Littlefoot as a stick-in-the-mud and the rest of The Gang as strawmen rebels, complaining about parental nagging. But like, both sides feel out-of-character. Littlefoot is just as much of a rebel as the rest of them are, and the rest of them have been in more than enough dangerous situations, have more than enough practical field experience, to know the reasoning behind these various tips for living. Everyone here feels too immature. And it's SO preachy.
Also the animation is REALLY jank, especially on Cera. I've noticed when Cera gets mad in a song, the animators use a lot more squash and stretch on her than normal. I don't like it, it's really jarring. The last third of the song is downright surreal.
The only decent bit is Cera mentioning Tria for continuity and Cera mentioning the adults harassing them with The Wisdoms is a recent thing. So I guess they had an off-screen parent conference about their kids constantly getting into trouble and decided to drill safety into their heads. Which, y'know, fair. Also, overall the song isn't offensively bad, it could be worse.
The song ends with Cera launching herself into some tall grass, and the other kids laugh at her for WAY too long. Then she screams and backs up out of the grass! She says there's something strange in there! The kids look on in fear and back up as the tall grass rustles!
No.
No, not this early, we're only 12 minutes in!
Not introduced in EXACTLY THE SAME WAY GUIDO WAS!!!
DAMNIT! Oh, just by their designs alone (and from what others have told me), I can already tell these three are gonna suck!
Blue: *emerges from the grass* "Well, hello!" (waves)
Pink: *backs out of the grass, when her butt hits Blue's butt, it makes a squeaky toy sound* "What did you say?"
Blue (coy): "I wasn't talking to you!"
Pink: *shrugging* "Then who were you talking to?"
Green: *squeak*
Pink: "Him?"
Blue: "Nope!" *he nods toward The Gang* "Them!"
Pink (scared): "Ooh!" *endeared* "Oooohhh!"
At this, The Gang take a step back. Right move kids, stranger danger, and these three are strange. Remember how I said Guido felt like a stand-up comedian? Blue and Pink do, too. They just have that performative way of speaking.
Pink runs toward "them", arms outspread! She calls Cera "beautiful", picks her up, and hugs her!
Stranger danger! STRANGER DANGER!!
Pink introduces herself as... (sigh) Doofah before putting Cera down. Blue is Loofah. Green is Foobie (but it 100% sounds like Doofah calls him "booby"). Loofah asks if there are any berries to eat, and the scene ends there.
Remember how previous movies had the guest characters voiced by famous celebrities, and I figured that must have been the plan for Guido? Well, these three are. Doofah is voiced by Sandra Oh, Loofah is voiced by Cuba Gooding Jr, and Foobie (even though he doesn't talk, he just squeaks) is voiced by Pete Sepenuk. I'm disappointed in them as people for taking these roles.
Supposedly, according to Wikipedia, these three are Beipiaosaurus. Which are SUPPOSED to look like this:
What a downgrade. See those claws, poking out of the feathers? Yeah, Beipiaosaurus were therizinosaurs, the claws on its arms were HUGE. Cera should have been disemboweled!
Next scene, we see Loofah, Doofah, and Foobie eating berries by the handful, sloppily and messily, with lots of gross smacking mouth sounds.
Littlefoot: "How long has it been since you ate?"
Loofah: "Must've been, uhhh, let's see... right before you guys showed up!"
Doofah: "Mm, but not berries! Berries are the best!"
Loofah: "The place where we're headed for has berries, too, and it's a valley just like this one! Hah, I wish I could remember what it's called... it's got a real catchy name!" *he bonks his head with his palm*
Doofah: "Is it 'Doofah'? Oh, ahahahaha, no ah, that's my name, nhaha! Don't worry, the Wise One will figure it out, eventually!"
...Sandra Oh plays Debbie Grayson in Invincible. And she's AMAZING in that! I'm glad this didn't kill her career. Because it SHOULD'VE! No, that's too mean.
Cera and Littlefoot are relieved to hear there's a "wise one", because they can tell as much as the audience that these two are idiots. Doofah eats a whole bunch of flowers and then starts choking on it. Foobie spits some berry juice at Loofah's face, and he remembers it's called "Berry Valley" (oh, thank dino-god, it's not the Great Valley, they're not gonna live here permanently).
Loofah finally realizes Doofah is choking and runs over to give her a really stupid-looking Heimlich maneuver, spinning her around and slamming her butt on the ground repeatedly (which makes squeaky toy noises, because of course it does). The Gang just watch, slack-jawed in stunned silence.
She coughs up flower petals and Loofah says they call that the "Yellow-Bellied Bounce". Doofah should've been disemboweled.
Doofah asks if there's anything to drink around here, and Cera leads them on. They walk off while talking about how many berries must be in Berry Valley, and Petrie looks back at the skeletonized berry bushes and grumbles about how they used to have berries here, too.
You know, having a really annoying character isn't forgivable just because they're annoying on purpose and the other characters think they're annoying, too. Just look at Jar-Jar Binks.
At a watering hole, they're sucking down a ridiculous amount of water. Littlefoot asks where the rest of the herd is, and Loofah explains they're on their way to meet up with them, then he forgets their destination again and asks Doofah what it was.
Doofah (quickly): "Berry Valley! Ever-since-our-herd-first-heard-of-Berry-Valley, we've-wanted-very-badly-to-be-Berry-Valley-Yellow-Bellies!" *she kicks water off, making squeaky toy noises*
Doofah and Loofah bounce bellies together, making a loud squeaky toy noise, then they laugh together REALLY annoyingly and high-pitched. Petrie can't understand them.
Cera: "Sooo, where are you meeting your herd?"
Loofah: "No idea!"
Foobie: "Mmmm!"
Doofah: "Can't remember!"
Littlefoot: "Then hhhhhhhow do you know which way to go?"
Loofah and Doofah: "Simple! We'll go, this way!" *they all point in different directions*
They look at each other and all start laughing, then hunker down in a huddle and talk hurriedly amongst themselves. Then they say "we'll go this way", and they all point different directions again. Foobie points the same direction, but Loofah is pointing the exact opposite direction and Doofah is pointing slightly to the right. They all laugh again, then wave goodbye to The Gang, Doofah again saying they're beautiful, and they walk away, weaving side to side, humming to themselves.
Okay, that was weird, but they're gone now, right?! We won't have to see them anymore, they were just in the movie for 4 minutes? No, of course not.
So, I get what they represent. They're stupid and dumb and represent stupid and dumb people who don't listen to their parents and learn The Wisdoms. That's obviously how they tie into the movie thematically, right? Doesn't make it any better. Although they do have a "Wise One" who I'm pretty sure is Foobie. He spat berry juice at Loofah to remind him it's called "Berry Valley", and then when they were deciding where to go, Foobie pointed the same direction twice, like that's the right way.
That night, Littlefoot's having another nightmare. He imagines the Yellow-Bellies (I get it, they were traumatizing) dancing on the fallen tree. He warns them to keep their eyes and ears open, since it's a long fall, and they all dramatically look down. Loofah and Doofah freak out and run toward Littlefoot, scrambling over each other until they both trip and fall to their deaths off either side of the tree (oh, if only). Littlefoot wakes up, gasping.
Littlefoot: "That does it, we've gotta help 'em!"
WHAT?! NO!! That's the motivation for this movie?! Littlefoot thinks they're fucking stupid idiots who need help from children?! You knew them for FOUR MINUTES, why are you going to risk your life for them?!?!
At dawn, Littlefoot has gathered The Gang and is leading them up the Great Wall.
Cera thinks this is ridiculous, and I agree. Littlefoot insists he needs to teach them The Wisdoms so they stay safe.
Cera: "Who cares if those three go wandering around in the Mysterious Beyond?!"
Ducky: "I do! Yup yup yup!"
Littlefoot: "Me too! After the Sleep Story I just had, I can't let them go like this!"
Cera: "You and your Sleep Stories! You've got to learn to relax."
Petrie: "Me think you got to stop eating Tree Stars right before sleepytime!"
I can't tell, but the movie might be making a reference to 10 here, since the inciting incident of that movie was Littlefoot and his grandparents having a prophetic dream. If so, that's a decent continuity nod.
Well, maybe we'll get lots of fun adventuring time before the kids catch up to the Yellow-Bellies. We're only like 18 minutes in, this is pretty early to start the adventure, so maybe the film will be more adventure-focused like 5 or 10. The Yellow-Bellies had half a day head start, they should be pretty far along by no-
Nope. Next scene, later in the day, we see the Yellow-Bellies standing on the edge of the Great Wall, all marveling at the Mysterious Beyond. Loofah and Doofah have gotten turned around and are looking at the Great Valley, thinking that's the Mysterious Beyond. Foobie makes some weird squawking noises to alert them to the fact that they're facing the wrong way.
Yeah, Foobie is definitely the "Wise One". Littlefoot walks up behind them and says hi, jumpscaring all three into smashing their beaks into the ledge beneath them, cracking it. They're touched the kids came to see them off, and Littlefoot says he doesn't think they're ready to go.
Loofah: "WHAT?!"
Doofah and Foobie: "Huh?"
Loofah: "But we have to! We have to lead our herd to Berry Valley!"
Doofah: "They'd be lost without us!"
Petrie (looking at Cera): "...You not gonna say something?"
Cera: "Maybe later."
Hah! Okay, the film got ONE laugh so far.
Littlefoot says he's gonna teach them some Wisdoms because you never know what's gonna happen. Then the ledge crack grows and falls, all of them sliding down the Great Wall with it!
Doofah starts having fun, and they surf the rock down the wall and up some curved slopes like a snowboard. Petrie just flies over them. They stop on the lip of a cliff, but then when Petrie lands, it tips forward and slides down again to another cliff. Loofah says that wasn't so bad, then steps forward and falls. Unfortunately for me, he falls on the cliff side of the rock, not the 500-foot sheer drop side.
He falls on his face, and when he pulls his beak out of the ground, he remembers where they're supposed to meet the herd! At a huge pile of rocks that look just like a Yellow-Belly! He looks out, but can't find it, turning around to reveal a pile of rocks behind him, perfectly matching his silhouette.
Foobie points at it, and then when Loofah doesn't understand, he physically turns Loofah's head to make him see it.
Loofah: "Wooow... we look like that?!"
All three get all self-conscious about their appearance, Loofah lifting up his giant gut and then dropping it with a sloshing sound.
Remember how I said the Spiketails in 8 were an example of moderately positive fat representation? In that they ate a lot but were very matter-of-fact and practical about that, and were approving of Spike for eating a lot, too? And the movie didn't really make fun of them for it?
Yeah, the Yellow-Bellies are non-stop fat jokes.
Littlefoot praises Foobie and then says he's gonna teach them the Wisdoms, they just need to listen and repeat what he says. The Yellow-Bellies, to their credit, seem mildly uncomfortable with being talked down to by this kid, but they go along with it and listen up. He says to "keep your eyes and ears open", and they keep listening expectantly. He tries explaining that was it, but they just get confused.
Petrie tells Littlefoot to give up, and Cera says they need to go back home, since it's gonna be a long hike uphill before dark. Littlefoot feels iffy about leaving them, but Petrie and Ducky point out they can see the meeting place, and then once they meet up, the Wise One will take care of them (wait, are they seriously gonna drag out the reveal that the Wise One is Foobie? It's so obvious). Littlefoot relents and tells them to stay in a group before leaving with The Gang. Doofah thinks that sounds fun. The Yellow-Bellies squeeze together and walk away with arms slung over their shoulders.
Okay, NOW we get movie time without them, right? NOPE!
Littlefoot hopes they remember the "stay in a group" Wisdom, then they look back and they're already split up and walking in different directions. Cera, exasperated, agrees to help them until they find their herd (no, please Cera, stay strong, I can't take much more). They turn around (noooooooo....).
Doofah freaks out when she sees Cera and she runs and trips onto Petrie, squishing him. Littlefoot scolds Loofah for not staying in a group, then tells Loofah his plan to reunite them then return before dark. Uncomfortable, Loofah asks which group will lead, and Littlefoot very slowly (clearly enunciating every syllable) says The Gang will. The kids DEFINITELY think the Yellow-Bellies are MORONS. Littlefoot promises Petrie that after this, they'll get home before dark.
Okay, so the message of the movie is the opposite of what I said before. The Yellow-Bellies have their own culture and "Wisdom" and Littlefoot's being a preachy brat by imposing his own cultural ideas on them and assuming they're stupid. Except they are stupid, I hate them, and I don't want to respect their culture.
As they're walking along, Doofah sings horribly off-key while skipping and plucking flower petals and throwing them in the wind, annoying Cera. Ducky laughs at her and when she turns around, Petrie rats Ducky out. At the back, Foobie shares some leftover berries with Spike. At the front, Loofah has a question for Littlefoot.
Loofah: "So these, what do you call 'em, Wisdoms you were talking about? Explain 'em to me again, would you please?"
Littlefoot: "They're just... thoughts to help you get through life and stay safe."
Loofah: "OH, you mean like 'go with the flow of the Big Water' or... 'up with your tush and you look like a bush'."
Littlefoot: "Huh? I don't even understand that one."
Loofah: "Just relax! There's nothing out here to be so worried about! We're completely ALOOOOOOONE!!!!"
Okay, so the bush thing is gonna come back later, obviously. That's why they've been trying to stick their heads in the ground. I'm picking up on what this movie is putting down. I just hate it.
Also, yeah, Loofah screams "alone" super loud and then we cut (in a really janky and low frame-rate pan, actually the animation this whole movie has been really off-model and weak) to a pack of Sharpteeth, listening in.
Wikipedia says these are Baryonyx, and that's... not too far off from what they're supposed to look like. Good job Loofah, you've doomed us all.
Later, Cera's whining that she just wants to go home and they can handle the walk over by themselves (yes, please). In response, Loofah sits down and announces that he's thirsty like a toddler. The other two follow suit. Littlefoot says they passed a watering hole before, why didn't they drink then? Loofah retorts he wasn't thirsty then, but he is now, and the other two agree with that logic. Cera says the Wisdom "plan ahead" covers this, and Littlefoot suggests they search for another watering hole, how about in that dangerous-looking canyon?
As you can see, the Yellow-Bellies are staying put because they're "too thirsty to move".
Later, Doofah (oh, c'mon, now we're focusing on them even WITHOUT The Gang?!?!) sees a mirage in the distance, and Loofah sees it too, and he wakes up Foobie. Foobie realizes the thing they're looking at (the pack of Baryonyx charging toward them with REALLY terrible animation, like my god it's bad) is real and he desperately tries to make these two morons who are too dumb to live get up and run away. He just barely succeeds when the Baryonyx reach them and the brown one bites one of his tail feathers. It's only after they've started running that Doofah and Loofah finally realizes they're real.
What follows is an unbelievably poorly-animated and excessively long chase sequence into the canyon. The Gang hear the screaming and run back to see, and somehow they're on a ledge high over the Yellow-Bellies, who get cornered against a stone wall (EAT THEM, BARYONYX!)! They try to bury their heads again, but the ground is still too hard!
And then... the stupidest thing ever happens! The Yellow-Bellies start bouncing up and down on their butts, shaking the ground and making rocks fall. The Gang help out from above by pushing more rocks down, and eventually a huge rockslide buries the group of Baryonyx.
THEY'RE THERIZINOSAURS!! THEIR DEFENSE MECHANISM SHOULDN'T NEED TO BE BOUNCING ON THEIR FAT ASSES TO SHAKE THE FUCKING EARTH, THEY SHOULD HAVE MASSIVE CLAWS TO DEFEND THEMSELVES WITH!!!
I hate this, so much. For so many reasons. The Baryonyx should have been disemboweled.
The Yellow-Bellies run over the buried Baryonyx and run up to the ledge the kids are on, then run right past them out of the canyon. When Littlefoot sees the brown Baryonyx still moving, he pulls a fucking Mortal Kombat fatality and pushes another rock, completely burying it in a rockslide. Merciless. Everyone stops running, gasping for breath.
Doofah: "So, did you find any water?"
Cera: "Grrr... THAT'S IT!!!" *she charges at them* (YES!)
Littlefoot: "Cera, wait!" *he jumps in front of her* (NO!) "WE'VE GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE, NOW!!!"
Doofah (cheerful): "Okie-dokie!" *they walk away*
Cera (stunned): "...here we go again."
I don't know if that line was supposed to be delivered that way, but Littlefoot's yell definitely gave me the vibe of "stand down, soldier, that's an order". It felt very forceful and directed. The mood whiplash in these scene is painful.
Later, Littlefoot is wondering if they'll be fine on their own, and Cera insists they will, based on how fast they can run. Littlefoot makes an aside that they need to know when to run (how do you know that's a problem they had? You weren't there for that scene!)
Finally, they make it to the big stupid pile of rocks that looks like a Yellow-Belly. Again, Loofah takes offense at the rock, this time at its huge rear end. Ducky walks forward and finds a pond, surrounded by a bunch of stupid-looking bushes. Doofah starts talking to them, and The Gang briefly thinks she's crazy until some of them pop up, and then Littlefoot realizes the meaning of the tush bush thing he said earlier, which is why they keep bonking their heads into the ground (obviously).
I'm sorry, I'm not even halfway through the film and I'm already burnt out. So is Petrie.
Petrie (abruptly): "Well, we found herd, time to go home before dark, that deal!"
Littlefoot: "Yeah but... maybe not now."
Ducky: "We came to show the Yellow-Bellies how to obey the Wisdoms, and now we are breaking one?! That does not make a lot of sense, no no no!"
Littlefoot: "I'm sorry, I just think it's safer to stay here with the big group and wait for the Bright Circle to rise again."
Petrie: "Ooh, our folks is gonna worry, for sure!"
Big Sis Ducky hates being responsible for anyone besides Spike, but she'll do it if she has to.
With this, we cut back to the Great Valley (YES, CHARACTERS I ACTUALLY LIKE!) at dusk. Grandma is walking through and looking around. She sees Tria and asks her if she's seen the kids.
Tria: "No, and I always tell Cera to be home before dark...!"
Grandma: "They know the Wisdoms, I wouldn't worry. But, perhaps we should speak to the others."
And that's the end of that scene. Gone too soon. We cut back to the Yellow-Belly herd having a pool party. They're all chatting and laughing with a super-annoying "hyuck-hyuck" laugh. Cera is moping.
This (nooooo) leads into (no no no) song 2 of the movie (nonononononono) Yellow Belly Bounce (FUUUUUUUUUUUU-)
4 MINUTES, OH LORD! (-UUUUUUUUUUUCK!)
I hate this. I hate this so much. This is like if Hakuna Matata was terrible. I hate the canon-breaking assertion that The Gang don't know how to dance and have fun (like this isn't the 39th song in the franchise). I hate the janky animation. I hate how the song is half annoying dialogue and half annoying singing, it barely counts as a song. I hate how it JUST. KEEPS. GOING. I hate that it's almost TWICE as long as most other songs in the franchise!
I REALLY hate the browbeating. How the kids are basically forced to conform and party the way the Yellow-Bellies want them to. Especially the blatant lack of respect for Cera's personal space throughout. Seriously, why the hell did they write the scene with the guy who sounds like Yakko like he's harassing her at a bar?! I hate how they wanted this to be the catchy centerpiece of the film that kids would sing and emulate, despite what a bad message it is to browbeat people into partying if they don't want to! I hate that this movie, which has the GALL to preach good morals and life lessons, has SUCH A BAD MESSAGE central to the main song which is central to the film!!
Remember kids: "stay in a group", "keep eyes and ears open", "be home before dark", "plan ahead", and "bully people who don't conform"!
I hate how annoying ALL the Yellow-Bellies are. All of them, they're all loud, obnoxious, stupid, their designs horribly clash with the setting, they're bouncing fat jokes, they're prehistorically inaccurate, and they're OBVIOUSLY MADE JUST TO BE SQUEAKY-TOYS FOR MERCHANDISE! Foobie's the only one who's less annoying because he doesn't talk, but he still sucks (and I caught that "Foobie" cheer, the movie still thinks it's going to be a twist when he's revealed as the Wise One).
I hate everything about this. There's nothing I like. This song gets a 1/10.
The raucous sound of the party wakes up the Baryonyx leader (impressive, considering the party is quite a ways away from that canyon...) who pushes out of the rock pile. So the party isn't just stupid and horrible, it's actively detrimental. It would have been better if the party hadn't happened. Also, both times the Baryonyx have been alerted to our position by the Yellow-Bellies being loud idiots.
Later, everyone's asleep and all the Yellow-Bellies are snoring with REALLY ANNOYING squeaking sounds. I'm sorry I keep bringing it up, but I need to emphasize to you how the Yellow-Bellies are CONSTANTLY making really annoying noises in the background. Littlefoot wakes up Cera to tell her that he's going to help lead them to Berry Valley. Cera complains, but Littlefoot points out they didn't see any "Wise One" in the whole group (they're really dragging out the reveal that it's Foobie).
Littlefoot: "We already had to save them from Sharpteeth once. I just don't think they stand a chance. I'm going with 'em!"
Cera: "You- Hey, y'know Littlefoot, the Yellow-Bellies got along just fine before they met us."
Littlefoot: "Maybe they were just lucky. And luck can run out, but Wisdoms can keep you safe."
Cera: *sigh* "There's one more Wisdom you should know. DON'T EVER WAKE ME UP AGAIN!!"
Cera spends this whole movie being right, but everyone's a jerk to her because she's being a grouch about it.
In the Great Valley, Grandma's standing alone when she declares, apropos of nothing, that she's worried now. A weird amount of Grandma focus here. I wonder if they're making up for last movie, where she had no dialogue at all.
The next morning, the herd of Yellow-Bellies is on the move and they're ALL MAKING LOUD AND ANNOYING SQUEAKING SOUNDS! Littlefoot stands in front of them, alone and intimidated.
He looks back and no-one's behind him. He looks forward and is disheartened by the number of them and how none of them are paying attention to him. He's taken on too big of a task, leading a huge group like this by himself.
Cera: "You really think we can lead this herd of goofballs to Berry Valley?" *she and the rest of The Gang walk up*
Littlefoot: "You mean... you're with me?"
Cera: "Aw, you'd be lost without us!"
Petrie: "Yeah! Besides, me no wanna be the one who 'splains to grown-ups why you no come back with us!"
Ducky: "It would not be pretty, no no no!"
Littlefoot turns to address the Yellow-Bellies, but they're too loud and annoying to yell over. Cera screams and that gets their attention! They all (except Foobie) bury their heads in the sand. Cera tells Littlefoot to give them a Wisdom. But he doesn't know if they'll hear him with their heads in the sand. Foobie buries his head and makes a squeal underground that they hear, making all of them pop their heads up. Cera tells Littlefoot to give them a Wisdom (they re-use THE EXACT SAME RECORDING of her line! We're reaching levels of laziness unseen before!)
Kuttkefiit (huh, so that's what happens if I mistype "Littlefoot" with my right hand a little to the left) tells them to stay in a group and follow him. And then, Littlefoot leading, they just kind of wander off, with no clear direction for where Berry Valley is. The Sharpteeth pack follow behind. While walking, some of them deviate from the trail, but Petrie and Ducky herd them back in line like cowboys.
Then we cut to Grandma, Grandpa, Topsy, Ducky's mom, and Petrie's mom following their tracks (I guess this is happening now!) over the Great Wall and into the Mysterious Beyond.
The Yellow-Belly herd keeps trudging on under the hot sun, getting tired.
Cera: "Do you have any idea where you're going?"
Littlefoot: "Sssssort of. See, I've never heard of "Berry Valley" before, so it's gonna be someplace I've never been, right?"
Cera: "Yyyyyeeeeeeaaaah..."
Littlefoot: "Sssso, I'm going in directions I've never gone before! I'm bound to hit it sooner or later! Makes sense?"
Cera: "Mmmmaybe to some folks."
Loofah: "Makes sense to me!"
Littlefoot (aside): "Mmmm. Is that good or bad?"
Cera: "Do you have to ask?"
I guess the idea is they've been to the Mysterious Beyond so many times that he has an incomplete map of it in his head? Also, why are they dragging out the first syllable?
Loofah asks if there's any water, and Littlefoot says they'll find some eventually. Loofah runs forward and falls off a cliff (YES)! He's okay, he fell in a pool (NO)! Littlefoot calls back to tell the rest and he's bowled over by the stampede of Yellow-Bellies. They all relax in the water and Loofah credits Littlefoot to the discovery of this watering hole.
Later, they're walking through a field of grass and dandelions.
Littlefoot (to Loofah): "So how did I do it?"
Loofah: "Do what?"
Littlefoot: "Find the water."
Loofah: "Same way you'll find Berry Valley! Same way we do just about eveythang. We just... feel it."
Littlefoot: "But it doesn't make sense. If you just feel it, then you never think about it, so how can you be sure you're following the Wisdoms?"
Loofah: "Ugh, now you're thinking like a Longneck again!"
Littlefoot: "Okay, forget I said that..."
This fuckin' anti-intellectualist bullshit... ugh. Not a fan. And I mentioned this at the top, but it bears repeating: Littlefoot's voice actor sucks. I can tell when it changes, which is constantly, and he sounds WAY too young and immature.
Foobie smells something and points forward while making excited noises, and the rest get excited and charge forward in another stampede! Ducky has to dodge and weave to avoid getting stepped on! Littlefoot asks Loofah what's going on, and he says they found Berry Valley!
Finally, this dumb-ass journey is over!
No, it isn't. It's just a few berry bushes.
Also, there's a compositing error in this shot where a Yellow-Belly runs underneath Littlefoot.
The Yellow-Bellies crowd around the bushes and eat. The kids are hungry and want to eat too, but they can't push through the solid wall of squeaky-toy butts. Cera yells at them to move, but they just ignore her. They eventually dissipate, having completely skeletonized the bushes, with no berries or leaves left for the kids.
Seems very rude and selfish of them.
The Yellow-Bellies take a midday group nap, and Littlefoot's bothered by something. Cera asks what's wrong.
Littlefoot: "I thought I could teach 'em our Wisdoms. But instead, I'm starting to think like a Yellow-Belly. Ugh, I'm all mixed up! Maybe they don't really need us at all."
Yup, this whole adventure was a total waste of time, you should have stayed home and my life would've been a lot less annoying. This leads into song 3 of the movie: How Do You Know?
This song isn't good, either. It's not as offensively bad as the other two, but still not good. The central question of the song isn't really relevant to the question at hand, which was more about Littlefoot questioning his own leadership and wisdom, not about Littlefoot questioning who he should listen to. And the final outcome just being "trust your gut and your brain and your instincts" is a pretty weak takeaway.
Especially since Petrie's mom spent most of last movie telling him to fly with the rest and not trust his instincts, it's rich to have him say this is a lesson she always tells him. The idea of other people's perspectives being unique is a decent one, though we've heard it many times before. And the music is weirdly loud, the sound mixing is off.
After the song, a huge thunderstorm starts rolling in out of nowhere! The Yellow-Bellies all wake up and start panicking, running back and forth. Loofah asks Littlefoot what to do, and he says to get to high ground (that would be good advice if it was raining, but it's not, there's just lightning). Littlefoot also tasks Foobie with rounding them up (has he finally realized that Foobie is the Wise One?).
Littlefoot leads the group up a mountain pass, single-file. The kids in front and then the Yellow-Bellies in a row behind them. Littlefoot sees some lightning and second-guesses himself, since rain might wash them down the mountain. He's freaking about about Wisdoms and Cera tells him to do what the Yellow-Bellies do and "feel it" (really? the takeaway is really that the Yellow-Belly's instinct-only lifestyle is CORRECT?!). Then it starts raining.
Littlefoot decides to keep going, they're near the top and might be able to rest there.
For some reason, Ducky, the Swimmer, is really bothered by the rain. She covers her head and squints her eyes, and walks straight forward instead of turning, almost falling off the edge! Petrie flies over to grab her and pull her back up, then he reminds her to "keep eyes and ears open". What a bizarre character choice for the scene, why would Ducky be bothered by water?
She doesn't even listen, she just climbs on top of Spike then goes back to shutting her eyes. Like, girl. You swim underwater all the time! Real-life hadrosaurs didn't, but they do all the time in this franchise!
Eventually, they reach a fork in the path. Littlefoot doesn't think about it, he just trusts his instincts and goes left. Doofah gets distracted licking up rain, and wanders right. At the top of the left path, there's a huge rocky overhang they can take shelter in.
I swear, if the climax of this movie is rescuing Doofah from her own stupidity, I'm gonna be so mad.
They reach the overhang and crowd under it, Ducky and Petrie get squished by the huge pile of Yellow-Bellies and then there's a fart joke. Hilarious. The Yellow-Bellies laugh uproariously at it, but I agree with Petrie that it's not funny.
But it's not just any fart joke! I shit you not, they play the "fart with reverb" meme sound effect, sans reverb. This exact one:
This movie came out in 2007! This sound effect only became a meme in the last few years, how the hell is it in here?! Was this a pre-existing stock fart sound effect for years before the internet discovered it? Or, even worse, is this movie the ORIGIN of this specific sound effect?
See, this is what this movie is doing to me, I'd rather be researching the origins of a fucking fart sound effect than watching this piece of garbage.
Whatever, back to the film.
Nevermind, the animators fuck up and accidentally include Doofah in the crowd shot, even though she's not supposed to be here.
She's like, right there. Right next to Loofah, right in the middle in the front.
After pouring down for a bit (really not THAT long), the rain stops and the clouds clear and a sunbeam shines down. When Littlefoot announces it, they almost get run over by the stampede of Yellow-Bellies, again. Ducky and Petrie are embedded in the wall, with their beaks stuck. They pull themselves out.
It's at this point that Cera realizes Doofah is missing (what do you mean? she was just here in the group!) and asks where she is. None of them know, but then they hear her humming in the distance, and head down the mountain trail to find her.
Wait, what? The whole trek up here, flat rocky area, and overhang was POINTLESS?!?! I thought for sure this would be where Berry Valley is!
They head back down the trail and take the right side in the fork, then they reach Doofah, who is... wandering in circles, humming to herself so loud that it causes the mudslide, breaking the path and cutting her off from the rest over a gap. Littlefoot scolds her for not staying in a group, which she thinks sounds fun, and then he tells her to jump. She hops in place on one leg, not even realizing the potential danger (just let her die, she deserves to win a Darwin Award). Right before the mudslide spreads and hits her, he tells her to jump and she does a ballerina leap across, but doesn't make it and Foobie has to catch her!
No, none of you help, Foobie and the children have clearly got this. With much effort, they pull Doofah up. And then the Yellow-Bellies cheer and unfittingly epic triumphant music plays like this wasn't a complete waste of time.
Cera: "Way to 'feel it'!"
I'm so mad.
As they walk back, Doofah finally gets what "stay in a group" means, using the Sharpteeth in front of them as an example. Oh hey, the Sharpteeth caught up! The Gang run for their lives backward, and apparently they walked WAY further back than I thought, since they go left at the fork.
At the plateau, both groups split up and run around, it's chaos! Cera notices Doofah being chased down and she runs up to headbutt the Sharptooth from behind in the leg, which makes it trip over Doofah!
Cera cites the Wisdom of "bump 'em with your horn".
Ducky and Petrie run from another Sharptooth and cite the Wisdom of keeping eyes and ears open. Ducky jumps over a rock which the Sharptooth trips over!
The scarred Sharptooth corners Littlefoot against a ledge, but he escapes by... just running between its legs. He doesn't even do anything tricky. They both just stand there for like three seconds, then Littlefoot runs forward between its legs and it does nothing to stop him. The Sharpteeth and Yellow-Bellies both regroup and as the Sharpteeth approach, Loofah asks Littlefoot what the Wisdoms say!
Littlefoot notes that the ground is too hard to bury your head in, then he asks Foobie what they should do. Foobie yells at the Sharpteeth, making them back up. Littlefoot agrees and tells everyone to "sing", and they all scream at the Sharpteeth, hurting their ears and making them back up. Then Littlefoot tells them to "dance" and they all bounce up and down on the ground, making more noise and intimidating the Sharpteeth even more, pushing them up against the cliff. The Yellow-Bellies bounce forward menacingly, still screaming, until the wet ground breaks and the cliff falls with the 4 Sharpteeth on it!
This is easily the stupidest Sharptooth defeat so far in the franchise, and I'm including 8, 11, 12, and their earlier defeat in that. And again, BEIPAIOSAURUS HAD MASSIVE CLAWS! THEY SHOULDN'T BE WINNING FIGHTS BY SCREAMING AND BOUNCING!
Littlefoot (looking down): "What d'you know, they're still in a group!"
What a terrible one-liner. The Yellow-Bellies laugh at it, but they're easy to amuse. Loofah asks Littlefoot where to go next, but before Littlefoot can respond, Foobie smells something and freaks out, pointing frantically. They run over and look down off a ledge to see...
Berry Valley! (FINALLY! Also, I called it!)
Littlefoot: "Great job, Foobie! You found it!"
Foobie: "Mm-hmm, mm-hmm!"
Doofah (flatly): "That's why they call him the Wise One."
Duh. The movie had WAY more than enough foreshadowing for this "twist", I caught on almost instantly. The Gang, however, are stunned.
Littlefoot (aside): "He's the 'Wise One'?!"
Cera: "Guess so!"
Loofah credits Littlefoot for helping find the Valley, since he brought them here. Ducky just wants to go home.
The Gang and Yellow-Bellies wave good-bye to each other (Doofah says they're beautiful), and Ducky apparently missed the entire message of the movie.
Ducky: "Do you think they will make it okay? They still do not have any Wisdoms."
Littlefoot: "Actually, Ducky, they always did! And now, they've got ours, too. You know, I think it takes a little bit of both."
Cera: "I can't believe it, a Longneck just learned something!"
Littlefoot: "Yyyyeah, I just wish I knew how to get back to the Great Valley."
Cera: "We'll find it, we always do."
These two lines from Cera are among the few lines in this movie that bring me any amount of joy, since they're decent continuity nods.
The Gang walk back through a forest, not a way they came from, but taking a shortcut. Suddenly, they hear some thudding noises, see some huge menacing shadows flash between the trees, and...!
It's just their guardians (wait, how? they JUST said this is a different path, and the guardians were following their tracks).
Also, I guess Tria joined them at some point? And Petrie's mom is off-screen? Either that, or the animators fucked up and swapped Petrie's mom with Tria. Which. Would be a CRAZY mix-up to make.
The kids are happy to see them, and though "how they got here" is a long story, the kids are proud of how they followed the Wisdoms, even listing them off.
Grandma: "But you forgot the most important Wisdom: stay in the Great Valley."
Ducky: *shrug* "...we have trouble with that one, yup yup yup."
They walk home as the narrator chimes in that the young dinosaurs learned from this journey that Wisdom comes in different forms.
To no-one's surprise, the end credits song is an instrumental version of Yellow Belly Bounce.
Yeah, this fucking sucks. They were right, this is easily the worst Land Before Time movie. The Gang were out-of-character, the songs ranged from below-average to atrocious, and the FUCKING Yellow-Bellies hogged SO MUCH of the film's screentime.
Like, Guido was a major character in 12, and I hated him, but he wasn't literally the entire focal point of the movie. Petrie carried the main plot while Cera had her own subplot, and while Guido was heavily involved in Petrie's plot, Petrie was the main character of it. But this movie was so goddamn simple. There were NO subplots, no depth. Unless you count the guardians searching for them, but they didn't even matter to the story. This movie has one central plot involving the Yellow-Bellies, and that's the entire plot and nothing else matters. At least 11 had the step-mom subplot, 13 has NOTHING.
If you hate the Yellow-Bellies, and it's REALLY HARD not to when they're meant to be annoying, than there's nothing really to like in this movie. The writers expected the Yellow-Bellies to carry the film, and they really misjudged how ear-bleedingly infuriating they and their FUCKING SQUEAKING was gonna be. What an absolute stain on the resumes of the guest-star voice actors playing them. Also, Guido at least had some okay moments mixed in with all the terrible. The Yellow-Bellies didn't. There was not ONE POINT in the WHOLE MOVIE where I liked ANY of them.
Foobie has the dubious honor of being the Yellow-Belly I hated the least by virtue of being a lot quieter and not being a fucking idiot, but I still disliked him. Loofah sometimes feels like he's patronizing Littlefoot, just being nice because he's a kid, but sometimes he's obviously and genuinely looking to Littlefoot for leadership and the whole thing is very jarring and confusing. To contrast Foobie as "the wise one" and Loofah as "the chill one", Doofah had to be "the quirky one", which meant she had the misfortune of being a female character who was EVEN STUPIDER and MORE ANNOYING than the others!
Also, the whole "Grandma dying" thing went absolutely nowhere. It only existed to facilitate Littlefoot's personality shift into being a rule-following know-it-all, and then was never addressed again. Despite there being a nighttime scene in the middle where it could have come up again in another nightmare, it didn't. We didn't even get a moment calling back to the fallen tree over the ravine, unless you count Doofah with the mudslide, but that was pretty different. And Grandpa got no dialogue in this movie, I guess to mirror Grandma not getting any dialogue last movie.
I guess, if I have to give the film some credit for something, it properly foreshadowed the "Wise One Foobie" twist and also the whole "bouncing and screaming" thing being the Yellow-Belly's unique way of fighting. Except the former was way over-foreshadowed to the point it was painfully obvious, and the latter was among the stupidest things I'd ever seen in my life. They didn't even bring back the head-burying thing and that they can communicate underground.
I guess 13 did bring the racism theme back after 12 ignored it entirely, but "The Gang is disrespectful to another people's culture out of ignorance" is a plot point copied from 9, which copied it from 5. And, if anything, the Yellow-Bellies are JUST as disrespectful to outsiders, especially in their big song. And it's hard to respect them when they really are too stupid to live at multiple points. Literally ALL of the drama in this movie comes from the Yellow-Bellies being so stupid that it causes problems. Even the Sharpteeth wouldn't have found them if Loofah hadn't yelled and alerted them.
The message of "The Wisdoms" makes the movie feel SO preachy, it feels like an after-school special. Like a movie-length version of Sonic Sez or those cartoon crossover anti-drug PSAs. And then the film has the AUDACITY to include a PRO-BULLYING message RIGHT in the dead center of the film, during the big bonus-length centerpiece song! Genuinely, how DARE it!!
Pros: I related to Cera, Petrie, and Ducky throughout the first half, in that I also did not want to be here.
Cons: Atrocious side characters. Shallow plot. Terrible songs, including The Worst Song. Overly preachy about good morals, while also having a bad message. Abysmal writing. Worst Sharptooth "fights" yet. Terrible prehistorical inaccuracies. The anti-intellectualism makes me blood boil. Littlefoot's three voices were all bad. Terrible animation and some glaring animation errors. Fat jokes.
Score: 1/10. There is nothing good about this film. Nothing I enjoyed enough to be worth a full point. This was miserable, and I hated every minute.
The Land Before Time: 8/10 (hypothetical uncut version: 9/10)
The Great Valley Adventure: 8/10
The Time of the Great Giving: 7/10
Journey Through The Mists: 7/10
The Mysterious Island: 9/10
The Secret of Saurus Rock: 2/10
The Stone of Cold Fire: 10/10
The Big Freeze: 6/10
Journey To Big Water: 4/10
The Great Longneck Migration: 9/10
Invasion of the Tinysauruses: 2/10
The Great Day of the Flyers: 3/10
The Wisdom of Friends: 1/10
Don't forget to keep an eye out for the TV show poll tomorrow!
Mashle: Magic and Muscles, Where Everyone is the Straight Man to Everyone Else's Wise Guy
One of the funniest bits in Mashle that consistently keeps the comedy up is that everyone is a total weirdo in some way, but everyone also thinks everyone else is the weirdo and they're the normal one.
This allows for an infinite well of comedy, everyone just passes around the Wise Guy baton and thinks they're the normal one.
Finn thinks it (read right-to-left):
Lemon thinks it:
Lance thinks it:
Dot thinks it:
Even Mash thinks it:
Hell, even the main villain thinks it!
And it's here, with Innocent Zero's statement, that this idea turns from a running gag into an actual theme of the story.
The main theme of the manga is tolerance, that Mash's disability of not being able to use magic is considered by society as a crime worthy of killing him. Society is so bigoted and intolerant that 0-liners like Mash are genocided and weak 1-liners like Regro or Wahlberg in his youth are looked down upon and abused.
Mash's main goal in the series is to change society and make everyone accept him so that he can live his life in peace. And it's with this gag that the series brings in a new angle to the central theme of tolerance.
Not just that everyone is intolerant of Mash because of his disability, but also that everyone is judgemental toward everyone else, even in small ways.
Huge manga spoilers ahead (like, end-of-series spoilers):
There's a reason Mash's big speech in the final chapter is about how glad he is that everyone has accepted him for who he is, and that society would be better if everyone was accepted for who they are and was able to live in peace.
He's summarizing the main theme of the story, which has been weaved into every element of the story from the very start, even in the gags and jokes.
Everyone has something weird about them that everyone else judges them for. But everyone is weird. "Normal" is a facade, a fallacy. No-one is truly "normal". The world would be better if everyone was more tolerant of everyone else's weirdness.
Fucking hell Oda really decided Brook would suffer the most out of the Straw Hats
oda heard me say that Brook had "arguably one of if not the most tragic backstories in the series" to various people over the years and decided to settle that argument
The Land Before Time XII: The Great Day of the Flyers
Last Time:
Littlefoot was small.
Cera's dad met an old flame.
Fraggle genocide.
This Time: Starting with this movie, I'm entering unexplored territory. If you don't count the TV show, which I might not cover, I haven't seen anything coming up, three whole movies I'm completely unfamiliar with.
I've heard dire portents of 13, but basically nothing about 12 and 14. Just based on the title of this one, I'm expecting Petrie focus.
The Universal logo is still not Pangaea.
Still pretty disappointing to me that they never play with the Universal logo, like it would be so cool if they-
Wait, what's happening?
YES!!! This running gag finally paid off! And they didn't just have the Universal logo be Pangaea from the start, they did a FAKE-OUT, having the Universal logo start normal and then reverse time INTO Pangaea!! That's SO GOOD!!!
I bet all of you who knew this was coming were just WAITING for this moment! Well, I can say this did not disappoint! I love when movies mess with the opening credits and logos, you're so used to just ignoring them that it's always jarring in a fun way.
I hope they re-use this opening for every future movie but I totally understand if they don't, because it would get repetitive and the fake-out wouldn't be surprising anymore.
Of course, this intro has to have the narrator talk. He talks about how the Earth has changed in dramatic ways, continents moving, becoming burning hot and freezing cold, species flourishing and dying.
Narrator: "Yes, the Earth is very different than it was in the days of the dinosaurs! But one thing that has remained the same since the time of the dinosaurs is the fact that everything is always changing."
From here, we transition to Littlefoot, Ducky, and Spike gazing up at the sky. They're searching for something in particular, but the movie isn't letting the audience in on what it is.
Ducky thinks she sees something, and Spike gets excited and bumps her off the ledge! Littlefoot stretches his neck down to catch her and when he pulls her up, she scolds Spike for scaring her and making her lose sight of what she was looking at. Littlefoot wonders where Cera is.
Littlefoot is voiced in this movie by Nick Price. I'm not familiar with any of the other things he's in. I haven't even seen that particular Peanuts cartoon where he played Schroeder. He hasn't gotten a lot of dialogue yet but so far, he seems to be doing a better job than Aaron Spann did last movie. Also, this is the first Land Before Time movie to be widescreen.
With Cera, she's glaring at an egg. Tria is also there and nuzzles it. Topsy (yup, I'm still using that name until "Topps" is actually mentioned by literally any character in-universe) walks in.
Tria wonders whether the baby will look more like her or him, and the two adults agree that they hope it looks more like Tria while giggling (odd that they'd agree on that, since Tria went on and on last movie about how handsome Topsy is).
Cera: *clears throat* "Is it okay if go meet Littlefoot and the others? We want to watch Petrie practice for the Day of the Flyers. ...I said 'I'm gonna go find my friends'!"
Tria: "Do you think it's cold? Do you think it needs more grass on top?"
Topsy: "No, it's fine!"
Tria: *sigh* "I think it's cold, c'mon!"
She leans over to rip up some grass and put it on top.
Topsy: "Tria, I don't-
Tria: "Topsy. Did you lay this egg?"
Topsy: "Um-mum-mum, nooo, but I was-"
Tria: "Than hush up and help me!" *Topsy grumbles but does it*
Cera: "So bye! I'm heading out to the Mysterious Beyond to see if I can get eaten by a Sharptooth!"
Topsy: "Okay, don't be late!"
Tria: "Have fun!"
Cera walks off, pouting, and now Tria thinks it's too warm.
Time-out! Topsy "married" Tria?! And got BIZAY! I was wondering if they were going to skirt around the implications, but no, they straight-up had Tria imply that she laid that egg. Props for going there. Hopefully whenever the egg hatches, the baby triceratops isn't as annoying as Dana and Dinah were.
Cera joins the others and she didn't miss anything. Right as she arrives, they see Petrie practicing. He's flying in a V-formation with 8 other young Pteranodons.
In case you can't recognize him, he's the one in the middle-right. They do some swoops and turns, Petrie following along perfectly, until he notices his friends watching and waves to them, which slows him down and makes him bump into the kid behind him! He flies forward and bumps into the Flyer in front of him, then falls onto the blue one, ultimately causing a huge pile-up and all 9 of them fall out of the sky!
They all crash to the ground, in various trees and bushes! One falls onto Ducky's mom's face. Petrie falls into a bush and has to yell to keep Mr. Clubtail from eating him with some leaves. Mr. Clubtail walks away grumbling, with another one landed on his tail. The Gang arrive as the group of Flyer kids gather, all glaring at Petrie. Petrie's mom flies in and the other Flyer kids are eager for the chewing out he's gonna get. But she's not mad, just disappointed. Which hurts even worse! Recognizing the situation has become awkward, The Gang leave.
That night, Littlefoot tells his Grandpa that Petrie was practicing with his brothers and sisters earlier, and Grandpa already heard about it from Mr. Clubtail. Wait, those ALL were Petrie's siblings? I assumed some of them were other Flyer's kids, Petrie usually has 4-5 siblings, not 8!
Littlefoot asks Grandpa why the Day of the Flyers is important. Grandpa explains that every herd has its own traditions, and the Day of the Flyers is a significant event because it marks a developmental milestone for young Flyers, showing they can fly with the herd. So it's a rite of passage, like a bar mitzvah. Littlefoot stomps his foot and says that it's not fair, Petrie can fly fine alone, his siblings just make him nervous. Grandpa reassures him that Petrie will do fine.
Over in Petrie's nest, his siblings are ganging up on him and shit-talking his flying abilities, saying that he does the opposite of what they do and he's hopeless. Seems inaccurate, he only messed up today because he got distracted waving to The Gang. Their mom comes over to break it up.
She makes them leave so she can talk to Petrie alone. She asks what the problem is, and Petrie doesn't know. She then asks Petrie if he'll be ready for the Day of the Flyers, and all he can promise is that he'll try his best. She reassures him that he always does, and bids him good-night. But after she leaves, Petrie's still in a sour mood.
Petrie: "They think me never do nothing right! Sometimes me wish me had a whole 'nother family..."
On that thought, Petrie goes to sleep while the camera ominously zooms out and music eerily reminiscent of the Lord of the Rings "Ring Theme" plays. Creepy.
Over with Cera, Topsy is kicking in his sleep, and Tria's too focused on the egg to sleep. Tria pokes Topsy to wake him up and demands that he move over so he doesn't roll over on the egg. Topsy protests, but does so, and Tria makes him scoot over further. Cera tells them good night, but they ignore her and Tria keeps telling him to move over even further and further. Topsy does and he falls off a ledge, to which Tria whispers "perfect".
Well. That's weird. Tria was a pretty thoughtful and kind character last movie, but with last scene and this one, her characterization has shifted dramatically. She's obviously being written as obsessed with making sure the egg is okay, but even with that excuse, she's just being written as straight-up mean. The last scene and this one feel like the writers watched some sitcoms and decided "nagging mean tiger mom with a put-upon emotionally detached husband" was a good dynamic to draw inspiration from.
Also, it's just inaccurate. We've literally found fossils of T-Rexs curled up around their eggs, we know that dinosaurs had the same instinct most other animals do to not roll over on their babies in their sleep. It's just a natural instinct. And the scene doesn't even make sense, Tria and Topsy were sleeping next to each other with the egg in front of them. It would be impossible for Topsy to roll over onto the egg.
The next day, Petrie is complaining to The Gang about what his siblings said to him last night. Ducky and Littlefoot assert that he IS a good Flyer, just by himself. Again, I don't know where they're getting this from, the problem earlier was him getting distracted, not flying in a group. They did a poor job establishing this.
Petrie: "That just it! Me good alone! N-Not so good with family..."
Cera: "Join the club... Huh?"
Okay, these faces are great, but I think they're a little bit of an overreaction. Like, what Cera said wasn't THAT dramatic. It reminds me of the group reaction shot in 2, but those faces were in response to Cera saying her dad told her not to play with other species. That's more of an appropriate reaction.
Littlefoot switches gears back to Petrie and tells him that the next time he's flying with them, he should remember how good at flying he is and that he can do anything! Petrie gets all hyped up on the idea that he can do anything, before deflating again with the admission that he hates flying through "sky puffies" (clouds), and isn't good at flying in the wind. Littlefoot points out that today is pretty windy, so Petrie should practice! Petrie takes off and makes some headway before being launched backward into some tall grass.
The others chase after him, but then hear a scream, which isn't Petrie! They poke their heads through some tall grass and Petrie runs out, petrified and pointing his finger forward, shivering uncontrollably! Ducky asks if it's a Sharptooth and Petrie shakes his head while still pointing. Grandpa and some other adults walk over, having heard the scream. The music builds to a dramatic crescendo as they all lean in to see whatever is hiding in the grass!
It's... it's... a weird little green bird-guy.
He's a Microraptor, which I actually mentioned last review as one of the smallest real dinosaurs, next to Aquilops. But unfortunately, he doesn't have one of the most iconic features of the Microraptor, that being their four wings.
Yup, Microraptors had wings on their back legs, too, and they were just as functional for flying.
The Microraptor walks out and timidly apologizes for scaring them. This only makes everyone more confused. He continues.
Microraptor: *clears throat* "Okay, I um, I guess you're all wondering why I asked you here, huh? Aheeee- hehe- well you're all wondering..." *he grins awkwardly*
Topsy: *walks in* "Alright, who's making all the racket? Huuuh?!"
Microraptor: "Ah, yeah that would be me, hi! I'm really sorry if you were disturbed. Eh, not that anyone's saying you're disturbed, least of all me! I mean, uh, you know, in the sense of being, uh, not all there you're- you're obviously all there, I mean just look at you, you're uh, hehehehe, ooo..." (he grins awkwardly)
Topsy: "I don't know who, or what, you are. But we don't like noise around here. Some of us are trying to hatch eggs!"
Microraptor: "OH!" *whispering* "I mean 'oh', I'm sorry lady, I didn't realize!"
Topsy: "Grrrrrr, not me!"
At that, Ducky cracks up laughing, but Cera glares at her and she shuts it. Topsy walks away, and the Microraptor warns him not to go that way. He ignores the warning and slides down a hill into a mud puddle. At this, EVERYONE starts laughing!
Ducky briefly stops out of fear, but resumes laughing when she sees Cera guffawing, too. Topsy gets up and glares at the Microraptor, growling. The Microraptor jumps into the mud on his own!
Topsy: "Just what we need: another weirdo!" *he leaves*
Grandpa: *walking away* "Ha ha ha ha! i just wish Grandma were here to see it!"
Damn, roasted his ass! That line of Grandpa's was clearly added late in development, too, since while he's saying that, his mouth isn't moving.
The Microraptor climbs out of the mud and Littlefoot asks why he did that.
Microraptor: "Saved him the trouble of pushing me in."
He shakes off the mud and asks where he is. Littlefoot answers the Great Valley and asks where he's from. He's not sure, he just kind of woke up here. And he's not sure how he got here, either. He says "they" call him Guido, but he's not sure who "they" are. And he doesn't have a herd, he's the only one like himself he's ever seen! Well, obviously because he has amnesia. Also, goodie, an amnesia plot...
The Gang are enamored with the concept of being the only one of your kind, especially Petrie. This leads into song 1 of the movie: One of a Kind.
But before I get into that, there's something I NEED to address about Guido. Just based on this one scene, I can tell that Guido's whole shtick is drawing from a VERY specific comedic stereotype. That being the "dweeby and nervous Jewish chatterbox". You know, like Mort in Family Guy or Kyle Schwartz from South Park. Guido doesn't have the accent, but the voice and mannerisms are an exact match. And if you know anything about those shows, you'd know that those characters aren't exactly a FAVORABLE comparison to make! As a Jew myself, I'm a little offended by Guido!!
Alright, that little rant out of the way, let's listen to One of a Kind.
It's kinda bad. I do like the structure of the song. It starts with Petrie and Cera complaining about their plots, then Littlefoot and Ducky reassure them, then Guido complains about being lonely, then The Gang accept Guido. However, it's poorly executed. The singing, lyrics, and musical flow are pretty annoying, actually.
And it has issues with canon. They're now fully and completely retconning Cera's siblings out of continuity. She had siblings in the first and second movies, but ever since movie 3, she suddenly became an only child. Except then 6 had an off-screen sibling who was old enough to have kids of their own and Cera had to babysit them, but that whole situation has never been referenced since.
And in this song, she complains about the new egg and wishes she could go back to being a single child, when it was literally a plot point in the first movie that Littlefoot was the only single child in the group. Even Spike got adopted into Ducky's family.
Also, the animation and choreography is really weird. Like, the faces are REALLY off-model in those shots where they're walking toward the camera, and the lip-synch varies from great to bad, sometimes even in the same verse! The song is lacking in creative or compelling visuals, Cera's verse is the only one that has anything interesting going on with the reflection and her on the rock. The last verse is just a copy of the "walking around the new kid" bit from You're One of Us Now.
Also, I'm not sure how old Guido is. He's got amnesia, so even he's probably not sure. And he's a Microraptor, he's supposed to be tiny. But it doesn't feel like he's written as a child, he feels like he's written as an adult. Specifically, as an adult stand-up comedian, and that makes his new friendship with The Gang feel weird. I wonder if they meant to get a famous guest voice actor for him, like Doc, Pterano, Thicknose, Bron, and Big Daddy had. But they couldn't get one, so they just said "fuck it, give him to Spike's VA" (yeah yeah, I know Rob Paulsen is a legend in his own right, but he's not a guest, he's voiced Spike in every movie but 1 and 6 and he also did Mo).
After One of a Kind, Littlefoot suggests that Guido might not be the only one. He's got kind of a long neck like Littlefoot and a sharp beak like Petrie, and maybe the weird stickly things on his head could fan out like Cera's frill. They take him to go see if anyone in the Great Valley is like him.
They talk in this scene like they've never seen anything like Guido and his feathers before, but they literally have. Remember Ichy from 4? Yeah, Guido is only a few steps removed from Ichy on the evolutionary tree. More bad continuity.
Later, Guido is on Grandpa's head and Grandpa explains they have long necks to eat the tenderest tree stars at the top of the trees (I thought it was to save the world during a solar eclipse?) Guido bites a leaf and tries to pull it off (I was doubting the "neurotic Jewish stereotype" read for a second, but he literally pulls while going "guuuuuu"). He pulls it off and flies backward down Grandpa's back and off his tail! Then he chokes on the leaf until Grandma whacks him on the back to make him cough it up! He is not a Longneck.
They try talking to Mr. Clubtail, who explains that he's got a bopper on his tail. When Guido asks what that is, he thwacks Guido with it!
They walk toward Topsy.
Topsy: "Don't even think about it."
They turn around and walk away from Topsy. Some good jokes here!
At the lake, Ducky shows him how to swim in the shallow end.
Guido: "Eh, oogh, I gotta tell ya, I got a real problem with swimming where I drink, yehh. Eh, I- it just doesn't seem right!"
Ducky: "Give it a try! You will be fine, yep yep yep!" *she leads him into the water*
Guido: "Ehhh, eh ehhh... Wait, wait! And you're sure there's nothing in there that bites?"
Ducky: "I am pretty sure."
Guido: *a shadow swims up next to Guido* "Bad answer! Nyehh-ehh-ehh-yee!"
He runs out of the water as the shadow surfaces, revealing a confused turtle. He runs into Spike and falls back, deciding that he's not a Swimmer.
I was finding it funny, but now I'm IMMEDIATELY getting sick of this bit. When Guido isn't talking or he's suffering slapstick, he's tolerable, but when he starts talking, it grates on my ears. This whole sequence is like a lamer version of the kids showing Chomper their specialties in You're One of Us Now, but where Chomper was cute and innocent, Guido is annoying and offensive!
From his position looking up, Guido sees Petrie practicing with his siblings in the V-formation. Petrie follows along fine, but then the leader decides to fly through a cloud and he panics, asking if they can just go around and then freaking out, yelling "roll" when they reach it! They collide with each other in the cloud, then all fall out!
Random Parasaurolophus: "Strange weather we're having today!"
This movie was written like a sitcom. Straight-up. It feels like it should have a laugh track.
Later, Petrie's sitting on a rock on a hill and Guido walks up to him, gasping and wheezing and panting the whole way. He's this close 🤏 to whining about needing his inhaler for his asthma (which shouldn't be something to laugh at, but it is a running gag with Kyle Schwartz in South Park). Guido says that everyone's looking for Petrie.
Petrie: "Me not know why. Me mess up everything! Me worst Flyer in Valley."
Guido: "Hey, come ooooon! Don't say things like that about yourself!"
Petrie: "Me not say it, brothers and sisters did!"
They're REALLY mad at him.
Guido: "Yeah. Eh, well, I thought that roll you did up there was really good! You know, I me- I mean, it was, it was excellent, beautiful, eve- spectacular!"
Petrie: "Good if me alone, maybe! But whole point of Day of Flyers is to fit in with others!"
WHAT ROLL?!?! Petrie yelled "roll" before he hit the cloud, but he didn't actually DO a roll, he just stalled in mid-air and the others crashed into him! Again, what they're saying happened and what ACTUALLY HAPPENED are completely different! Both times, Petrie has been told his issue is that he flies independently, but both times, the real issue was him getting distracted!
I swear, it's like the writers and animators are not on the same page here!
Petrie and Guido bond over not fitting in, and Petrie invites Guido to live with him. Not because he's a Flyer, no (it's not like the last feathered creature we met was a Flyer...), but just because they're both outsiders and could be friends over that. Then Littlefoot walks up and tells them that Tria's egg is about to hatch!
The entire Great Valley gathers for this special occasion! They didn't do that when a bunch of eggs hatched in 2, but every movie since then has ignored that happened. The egg hatches into a beautiful healthy (pink) baby Triceratops girl!
Tria and Topsy shed a few tears at how precious she is, and Tria introduces her to Cera, her sister. We see from the baby's POV as her eyes adjust for the first time and Cera smiling is the first face she sees clearly! Cera seems to like her, but then when the baby falls over, Tria and Topsy start cooing and fawning over her and Cera gets jealous again, walking away. Petrie calls the baby cute and Cera snaps at him!
Later, Petrie's mom is handing out berries to her kids for dinner. Petrie flies in.
Petrie's mom: "Well? Is it true? Does the Threehorn family have a new addition?"
Petrie: "Yeeeeaap! And uh, so do we!"
Petrie's mom (stunned): "Uh-huh. Petrie, I'm usually the one who makes that announcement."
Petrie: "Not this time! Everybody, meet Guidooooo!"
Lol at Petrie's mom's line.
Guido laboriously climbs up the wall into the nest, gasping and panting. Petrie's siblings are confused and surround him. They comment that he looks like a bunch of flowers, but doesn't smell like one. They painfully pluck a feather and ask what it is, and their mom tells them to quit crowding their guest. They walk over to Petrie.
Petrie's siblings (angry): "We've been wanting to talk to you, Petrie!" "Yeah, about what happened today!" "Yeah, you messed up again, Petrie!" "Yeah!" "Yeah, like you always do!" "Yeah, what's your problem, Petrie?!" "Yeah!" "Yeah!" "Yeah!" "Yeah!" "Yeah!"
Guido: "Hey hey, fellas, c'mon, give him a break! I mean, uh, of course he gets confused when he flies with you! Your rear ends look just like your faces so, uh, h-how can he tell which way to go?"
After a second of stunned silence, they all burst out laughing. Even mom laughs a bit before telling them to go to bed. One says that Guido's alright and slaps him on the back! Mom tells them to go to sleep, and that they're glad Guido could come visit (notice this is the second time she's firmly asserted that Guido is NOT a permanent resident, just a very welcome guest). Petrie and Guido lie down, and Guido promises to help Petrie practice before they go to sleep.
They DEFINITELY wrote this movie under the impression that Guido would be played by a celebrity comedian, like Adam Sandler. He keeps getting these weird stand-up comedy bits, and this one resolving the conflict between Petrie and his siblings felt particularly pander-y. Except they couldn't get a comedian to voice him so it's not pandering, it's just weird.
The next day, Tria is cooing at the baby, named Tricia (pronounced "Trisha"). Tria asks Cera if she can watch the baby while she leaves for a bit. Cera claims the cute shtick won't work on her, but when Tricia manages to stand up and looks all proud of herself, she wins Cera over. Tricia runs off into the grass, but Cera catches up to her and picks her up by her horn to carry her back. Tricia accidentally pokes Cera in the eye with her own horn!
Tria returns and Cera explains the situation, but Tria completely ignores Cera and focuses on praising Tricia for being able to run. While Cera's rubbing her eye, Topsy returns and they both start cooing over Tricia for running. Cera stomps off, angry, and Tricia watches her leave with concern.
Littlefoot and Ducky are eating leaves off a bush and talking about Guido's decision to live with Petrie. Ducky doesn't get why you'd choose to be a Flyer over a Swimmer, and while she's distracted, Spike walks up and eats the cluster of leaves in front of her. She gets mad at him (add it to the list), but then the ground starts shaking! It's just Cera, who runs in like a bat out of hell, trampling the bush! She asks where Ducky is, but Ducky's pinned under the bush. Littlefoot asks what's wrong and Cera starts ranting and stomping about her parents ignoring her, then Ducky asks her to move. She does.
Littlefoot: "Hey, listen. At least your dad's with you! And Tria seems really nice."
Good reference to Bron (interesting that Littlefoot seems to have some resentment there). Cera admits that's true, and that transitions into song 2 of the movie: Things Change.
Sorry about the audio issue in the last third, that's not in the movie.
Aw man, I want to like this song. The singing is good, the lyrics are decent, and the message is great. Change is inevitable, it changes you without knowing it, and sometimes change is good. The visual metaphors are also good, with the dandelion, cloud shadow, reflection, frog family, and the butterflies emerging.
But oof, that animation. They STILL haven't gotten the hang of that walking-forward singing animation in a way that doesn't look fucked up. The dandelion blowing away looks terrible. Cera's eyes are BLUE for a section, and overall the art is weird and off. The animation issues are really distracting and actually hurt my overall score. Not too much, they drop the song from an 8/10 to a 7/10. But still.
At night, Guido is massaging Petrie's shoulders and hyping him up.
Guido: "Okay, now remember Petrie, you can do anything they can do, alright? I-its just a matter of doing it at the same time!"
Petrie: "Uh, yeah, same time."
Guido: "So, so just keep telling yourself, eh... ooh ooh: 'I fly along with all the rest, I'm going to pass my flying test!' Go- go ahead and say it!"
Petrie: "Me fly along with all the rest, me gonna pass the Flyer test! Like that?"
Guido: "Ehh, yeah, close enough."
Guido pats Petrie's head and his siblings set off. Petrie joins them in formation and Guido and Petrie's mom both let out one single tear of pride (okay, that's a good bit of visual comedy). They fly in formation without issue while triumphant "air force" music plays.
Then we get a montage of time passing. At night, Cera's family is sleeping, and she looks fondly at her baby sister. In daytime, Petrie's family are resting to eat in a tree, and Petrie throws a leaf down to Guido. He tries to bite the leaf, but then spits it out. Then he sees a worm on the leaf and eats that happily, grossing out some of Petrie's siblings. Cera plays with Tricia and bonds with her, then when Tria comes over, Cera hides behind a log. Everyone watches Petrie practicing and Guido runs over him before crashing into a log. Night, Tria wakes up and briefly panics when Tricia is gone, only to see her and Cera sleeping together.
I'm surprised the worm thing hadn't come up yet, Guido's a Microraptor, he's technically a Sharptooth.
The montage ends with Petrie and his siblings coming in for a landing, all in synch, one-by-one. They all celebrate what a good job they all did, including Petrie. The Day of the Flyers is tomorrow, so their mom tells them to get some sleep for the big day. Guido, feeling like he has nothing more to offer, stays behind, but some of the kids run back to pull him with them.
That night, everyone is sleeping in the nest, but Guido stands up and starts sleepwalking. He steps on Petrie, waking him up, and then sleepwalks out of the nest. Worried, Petrie runs to the edge but then is surprised to see Guido walking far away from the nest, not splatted on the ground at the base.
Petrie flies after Guido and starts following and calling for him. Littlefoot overhears Petrie's calls and wakes up to follow them. He asks Petrie what's happening and freaks Petrie out. They lose track of Guido briefly and then see him much further away, over a ledge.
Ducky wakes up from Spike's tossing, but then she gasps!
Good visual comedy, a dramatic shot of Guido walking forward menacingly over Spike's back, framed by the moon. I feel like this is a reference to some alien movie, but I can't quite remember which. Close Encounters of the 3rd Kind?
So, sleepwalking is definitely how Guido got to the Great Valley, though his amnesia is still in question.
Guido steps on Ducky's head to move on and then Petrie and Littlefoot walk up and tell her what's going on. Ducky is eager to go, and she wakes up Spike. Apparently Spike usually wakes up around this time of night anyway for a midnight snack (really? that hasn't been in any of the other movies). As they follow, Ducky explains her eagerness.
Ducky: "I know all about sleepwalking. My auntie sleepswims, and my momma says 'do not ever, never wake her up when she is doing it'."
Littlefoot: "Why not?"
Ducky: "That I do not know. But my momma is always right."
Littlefoot: "Then I guess we better not let him wake up."
Ducky: *gasp* "I will go get Cera! If we have an adventure and she is not here, she will be SO mad! And I do not like it when Cera gets mad, no no no!"
Ducky peels off from the group. A few things to note here, funny they're acknowledging Cera not liking when she's left out of an adventure, that was a big part of 10. We've never met Ducky's aunt, but I kinda want to. Also, there are a bunch of old folk tales about why you shouldn't wake sleepwalkers, that they could have a heart attack or suffer brain damage. That's all nonsense. You still shouldn't wake them, but it's just because they'll be very startled, maybe lashing out or tripping and faling over. Basically like waking up a person normally, but upright.
Later, Cera has joined them, and she's annoyed Ducky woke her up just to walk all over the Valley watching Guido walk all over the Valley. Guido sleepwalks toward a creek, and to prevent him from drowning, The Gang line up in the water for him to walk across them.
Guido walks toward a lava pit, but The Gang line up so that he walks up Littlefoot's tail, off Littlefoot's head to Cera's tail, then off Cera's head to Spike's tail, then off Spike's head, successfully... diverting him slightly to the right, around the lava pit. Seems like they could have just made him turn around. Guido keeps sleepwalking upward and Cera asks Ducky what will happen if they wake him up. Ducky's not sure, just something terrible.
Guido reaches the top of the mountain and there's a ravine on the other side. Littlefoot sees a huge fallen tree and directs The Gang to push it to make a bridge to cross, but it's covered in long branches, meaning they can only push it, not roll it. It starts rolling and scoops up all the kids in the branches before flying through the air off a ramp and landing conveniently in the exact right place of the ravine for Guido to walk across. After Guido passes, Petrie flies up to keep an eye on him while the rest try to climb up.
The Gang struggle to climb up, but their movement destabilizes the tree and it starts sinking! The kids scramble to cross before it falls and Littlefoot needs to do a big slow-motion leap to reach the edge as it falls out from under him! They pull him up and collapse in a heap, panting for air.
I wonder if this is the same ravine they easily jumped over at the start of 2.
Petrie: "Okay, you guys lie around enough already, Guido still walkin'!"
Cera: "One more word and you won't be walking! Not for a long time!
Petrie (nervous): "Hehehe, me only kidding! Take your time! 'Sides, me think he pretty safe now!"
Petrie looks over and screams, Guido has turned around and is sleepwalking back to the cliff! He clambers and flies forward, trying to catch him, but he's too late, Guido falls. And then something that should have been obvious but they seriously play as a huge twist happens. Guido spreads his wings and starts sleep-flying!
He flies up over them and they gaze upward, awestruck.
Cera: "Hey, you know what I just realized?"
Littlefoot: "What?"
Cera (angry): "We didn't have to do that whole tree thing after all!"
Littlefoot: "Hehe, sorry."
Petrie notices that Guido's flying over the Great Wall into the Mysterious Beyond. He wants to go after him, but Littlefoot reminds him that The Day of the Flyers is tomorrow, he might not make it in time. Petrie thinks it over, but decides saving a friend is most important.
Littlefoot: "We'll be right behind you!"
Cera: "We will?" *he glares at her* "Okay, okay, we will."
I feel like the series has been pretty inconsistent on Littlefoot and Cera's early characterization of "Littlefoot hesitates to start things and then has determination to finish them" and "Cera rushes into things but then hesitates when things get tough" recently, but this is a decent moment to show that. If we're counting this as "the point things get tough".
Guido glides into the Mysterious Beyond and crashes, then wakes up. He asks what's going on, and assumes this is a prank. Apparently there were no terrible consequences for Guido waking up while sleepwalking, so this whole thing was pointless. Then the "ground" starts shaking. Then it stands up.
Oh, cool, a Spinosaurus! Not anywhere near the water, so clearly this 2006 movie hadn't quite gotten the memo on them being semi-aquatic, like crocodiles. But still, one of my all-time favorite dinosaurs getting focus is nice!
Guido falls off and tries to run but then the Spinosaurus bites down! Okay, it ate him, adventure's over, Guido's dead, let's go back home! No, obviously he's not dead. He is inside the Spino's mouth, though, and he tickles its mouth from the inside with a feather, making the Spino laugh until he can jump out.
That was really fucking stupid.
Guido tries to shake off the saliva then runs for it, and the Spinosaurus gives chase! It's just about to catch him when Petrie swoops in to save him, grabbing Guido and flying up with him!
That's impressive, Petrie has consistently struggled to carry Ducky, and Guido's bigger than her. Then again, Petrie has also gotten a LOT of flying exercise recently, and Guido's probably built light, since he's a Flyer, too. Petrie mentions that he's surprisingly heavy, and Guido attributes it to being soaking wet with Sharptooth spit.
The Spino keeps chasing them, and Guido's too heavy for Petrie to get enough height to get out of reach! Petrie's getting tired bobbing and weaving! The rest of The Gang crest the mountain and hear a roar, then look down at the scene.
There's a front-on chasing shot (a lot of those recently), with really bad compositing, they mess up the Petrie and Guido layers, putting Guido's head behind Petrie's legs when Petrie's carrying him by his nape. Petrie asks Guido why he's not flying himself, and Guido retorts that he can't fly! Spike slips and collides with the other kids, knocking them down into the valley! The Spino shifts attention to chase the bigger kids! Petrie bonks the Sharptooth on its head with Guido to try and distract it, but that fails!
Littlefoot leads the gang through a pair of interlacing rocks. Petrie tells Guido to hold out his arms and leg! Wait, and legs? is Guido actually supposed to have the Microraptor's leg-wings, and they just forgot to include them in his design? The Spino roars at them before a bite, and its breath hits Guido's wings, pushing them forward through the rocks and getting the Spino stuck in them!
Petrie lands, exhausted. Littlefoot tells him those rocks won't last forever, and Petrie walks over to rest on his head. There's a weird comedy bit where Guido freaks out at a jaw of sharp teeth but it's actually a Sharptooth skeleton and he apologizes to it for getting mixed up. Cera picks him up, and the Gang run away while the Spino struggles with the rocks and roars in frustration.
Back at the nest, Petrie's mom wakes up and tells her kids to wake up for the big day. While stretching, they notice that Petrie is missing. The Gang have crossed over the Great Wall and are on their way back. Petrie's worried he'll be late, but Littlefoot reassures him that he's got time. Cera tells him to rest up.
Guido: "Oh, this is all my fault! Hey, if you hadn't come to rescue me you'd be home and rested and- and- and ready to go! And I STILL don't understand how I even got there!"
Littlefoot, Petrie, Cera, and Ducky: "YOU CAN FLY!"
Guido: "What? In my sleep?! Okay, how weird do you guys think I am?!"
Cera: "Don't get me started..."
Petrie's siblings are worried what they're going to do without Petrie, and their mom says they'll have to go without him. The Gang have reached the lava pool on the way back, and Petrie thinks it might be better this way if he misses it. Cera insists he's a great Flyer, and Ducky says he flies like nobody else. Petrie points out that's the problem, repeating that the whole point of the Day of Flyers is to be like everybody else. Guido chimes in.
Guido: "But but but-but maybe that's not the problem, m-maybe it's the solution! Eh look, if there's one thing I've had to learn it's that you can't worry about being like everybody else! You just have to be yourself. Just be Petrie, and you'll be fine!"
Where did this revelation come from? Guido was asleep most of the previous scenes, he hasn't even flown yet. The last time he was conscious, he was cheering and celebrating Petrie successfully flying in formation!
Petrie agrees, and they hear a screech. The three judges are flying in, meaning it's just about to start! Littlefoot tells Petrie to go now, they'll catch up in time to cheer for him.
Why are there judges? I thought this was like a bar mitzvah or quinceañera, not a competition.
Tricia also hears the judges screech and she follows them, while Tria and Topsy are still asleep. They take positions on a cliff and Petrie's mom talks to her kids about how they'll have to make due without Petrie. Petrie flies in, demanding to know who said he's not here! His siblings ask where he was and then impress the importance of flying like them. He says that he'll fly like him, and their mom seems intrigued before asserting he'll do fine. The sun rises, and with it, tons of young Flyers in the Valley take to the air.
I didn't know there were that many Flyers in the Great Valley. Usually, when we see crowd shots, it's just Petrie's family and one or two others.
Petrie's family takes off, too, and take formation. The Gang trudge back, very sleepy, but then they see all the Flyers in the sky and wonder which one's Petrie. The Gang cross the creek from before over some rocks, while Tricia plays nearby, staring upward. She trips on a root and almost starts crying, but then a dragonfly distracts her and she chases it.
Petrie's mom watches her children fly in formation with concern, as the judges look on.
I like their designs.
Petrie chants to himself.
Petrie (nervously): "Me fly along with all the rest, me gonna pass the flying test." *he gets more confident* "Me fly real good, me fly okay, me gonna do it Petrie's way!" *more confident* "Me fly real good, me fly okay, me gonna do it Petrie's way!!"
He flies out of formation high above the rest, doing a spin, then returns to the group without hitting them. They're still annoyed at him for messing around. Their mom wonders what he's up to. Littlefoot sees him and Ducky wonders what he's doing. He's doing figure-8 loops around the front of the V-formation, before returning to it seamlessly! Guido climbs up on a tree for a closer look.
When Petrie returns, his antics inspire one of his siblings to break from the group, too. They fly up and spin around like a top, and Petrie praises them when they return. Petrie does another loop, and one-by-one, each of Petrie's siblings break from formation to do one little trick, then return to their spot in formation, keeping the practiced synchronicity while adding spontaneity in controlled bursts! This leads into song 3 of the movie: Flip, Flap, and Fly.
...goddammit, I am not immune to big showstopper musical numbers. This song rules! The closest comparison point I can think of is You Can't Stop The Beat from Hairspray, and that's high praise. In contrast to Things Change, the animation here is absolutely ridiculously good, constantly moving and shifting and escalating to the big finale!
The lyrics are a little repetitive, but there are enough breaks and solos to keep it feeling fresh. Especially with the judges, I'm so glad the judges weren't sticks in the mud, they're actually fun and encouraging. Which makes sense, they "judge" a children's rite of passage ceremony. It's not a serious competition, and it makes sense they'd be friendly and good with kids.
And the singing is great. Especially with the judges adding low and high pitched elements, they really add depth to the song's soundscape. And the message is great, Guido and the judges especially do a good job with their verses.
I was a bit concerned for the egg, but the song kept coming back to it as a throughline and the resolution there was pretty great with it hatching mid-song.
I'm not really a fan of Mo and the Tinysauruses, and while their cameos are short and fun, they're also confusing. The path from the Great Valley to Big Water involved like two waterfalls and a huge rock, how is Mo here? Also, a huge plot point of the last movie was that the Tinysaurus cave system was destroyed, how were they able to fly through it?
Whatever, that's a nitpick, the song is still fantastic.
As you can see, the song ends on Tricia. She's entranced by all the pretty Flyers in the sky. So entranced, that she doesn't look where she's going and falls into the river! She cries and screams as the current takes her downhill! Her cries wake up Tria and Topsy, who are still asleep even though they were clearly awake and watching during the song (bad continuity). The Gang hear her crying too, and Cera recognizes her little sister's voice and run off.
From his perch in the tree, Guido can see Tricia in the river. He wishes there was something he could do! He flashes back to everyone yelling at him that he can fly, and decides there's only one way to find out, before jumping out of the tree! He flails wildly before the wind catches his wings and he starts gliding. Petrie also hears Tricia crying and splits off from the group to dive down, not caring about finishing the show!
Guido dives down and grabs Tricia out of the water!... using his arms. Which have his wings on them that he needs to fly (a shame he doesn't have wings on his legs like a Microraptor should). He and Tricia immediately fall back in the water! They're being pulled by the current toward a massive waterfall! Guido tries to paddle with one arm, but it's not enough!
Right as they go over the ledge, Petrie dives down and grabs Guido's arm! He's strong enough to fly with both of them! Just barely! And he's slowly descending! So not quite strong enough! He yells for help and his siblings fly down to help, grabbing onto his wings in a V-formation and pulling up together!
You know, I think it'd be more effective if they were just grabbing different parts of Guido and Tricia and lifting, instead of putting all that stress on Petrie's shoulders.
Littlefoot and Cera run up to the bank of the river, and Tricia is so excited to see Cera that she accidentally wriggles out of Guido's arm! She falls, screaming, as Tria and Topsy also run up and gasp in horror! Cera manages to catch her on her face!
Tria celebrates that Tricia is safe and Topsy celebrates that Cera is a hero. Guido, Petrie, and all of Petrie's siblings float down to a satisfied and tired heap on the ground. Topsy thanks Petrie and Guido for saving Tricia. Guido puts his foot in his mouth.
Guido: "Well and-and thank you very much eh-huh, big guy! Eh, I mean, eh, I don't mean that you're, you know, like fat big, I mean that you're big, you're tall, I mean, well of course anybody is taller than me, you in particular, I mean hey, hey you got a nosebleed 'cause look how big you are, I mean ah-heh-heh, I- I really think I'd better go away, buh-bye, big gu- sir, oh!"
Guido exits stage right. Littlefoot points out that Petrie and his family didn't finish the Day of the Flyers, meaning they'll have to do it again. They're okay with that, since it was fun. Petrie's mom comes down and Petrie apologizes, but she's proud of them for knowing what's really important. And then she says that the Day of the Flyers will never be the same again, as the camera pulls back on a huge cloud of Flyer kids playing and swooping around in the sky!
Tricia gets distracted by a butterfly and follows it for a little bit before walking straight up to Cera.
Tricia: "Cewa!"
Her big sister and parents gasps with joy, and Cera nuzzles her.
The camera pulls out as the narrator explains that many changes occurred today and many more would come. Change is a part of life.
The end credits song is just an instrumental version of Flip, Flap, and Fly, not particularly noteworthy.
This was a bad movie that could have been great if it had a few more writing passes.
Like, I can't believe the Spinosaurus didn't come back, especially after Littlefoot literally said it would get out. And then the climax is based around Tricia being washed down a river and Spinosaurus is semi-aquatic, that should literally write itself!
The Spinosaurus is the most nothing Sharptooth encounter in the whole franchise. More nothing than the Sharptooth in 8, at least that Sharptooth got multiple scenes. This just gets one. Absolute waste of a Spinosaurus!
Similar to 11 and 8, this is a film where a huge part of the premise just DOESN'T WORK. Specifically, here it's no-one realizing Guido is a Flyer even though they've met Ichy before.
The whole "Guido sleepwalking" thing, despite being foreshadowed with his first appearance, feels like a cheap plot device to pad for time. It takes up 20 whole minutes of the film and accomplishes very little aside from filling the "adventure, crossing a chasm, Mysterious Beyond, and Sharptooth" quota. And they never answer the question of Guido's amnesia, they never go into his backstory. He just sleepflew here one day and that's it.
Overall, Guido is annoying, shallow, and offensive in the Jewish stereotype he embodies. If he wasn't a stereotype, he'd still be really annoying with how they obviously meant to cast a famous stand-up comedian to play him but couldn't get anyone. But because he's a walking stereotype, that makes him so much worse. He has good moments but they're few and far between, outweighed heavily by his bad and cringey moments.
On the other hand, the other new character: Tricia, is great. She's not NEARLY as annoying as Dana and Dinah. She occasionally gets into trouble, but it's usually very mild trouble, she doesn't mean to, and she's sensitive to when others are angry. She's also genuinely adorable, Nika Futterman did a fantastic job with the baby noises, and that little "Cewa" warmed my heart. Cera barely tolerated Dana and Dinah, but you can feel how much she loves Tricia.
Something I was disappointed by: they didn't even MENTION Pterano! With how Petrie-focused this film is, they should have at least mentioned him, considering how close he and Petrie were. Like maybe have Petrie's mom make a comment that Petrie is very similar to Pterano, they're both individualists who stand out from the crowd, and Pterano had issues with his Day of the Flyers, too. Something like that.
Pros: The Universal logo fake-out. One song is good, another is fantastic. Tricia is great. Petrie and Cera were both great in their own plots.
Cons: Guido offends me. Guido is unfunny, despite constantly making jokes. Guido's sleepwalking wasted 20 minutes. What Petrie's issue is, exactly, is inconsistent. Very bad continuity. Terrible Sharptooth, waste of a Spinosaurus. One song is bad. The writing for the first half is hackneyed and sitcom-y. The climax is tacked-on.
Score: This is a movie with highs and lows. But, frankly, it's a lot more lows than highs. And while some highs are REALLY high, some lows are REALLY low. I'm giving this one a 3/10, with a huge asterisk that it has some genuine 8-9/10 high moments.
The Land Before Time: 8/10 (hypothetical uncut version: 9/10)
We're at the "JK Rowling is personally funding litigation to try and destroy AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL" stage of rabid UK terf brain.
Screenshot via Alejandra Caraballo @esqueer.net on bluesky
Tldr Amnesty International, global human rights organisation, published a report called 'A growing threat: the anti-rights movement in the UK'. In it is detailed, amongst others, a whole bunch of transphobic groups and organisations, including Beira's Place, JK Rowling's trans exclusionary sexual violence support service. JK Rowling threw a shit fit and got Amnesty to take the report down by threatening libel. This was obviously not enough, because you can't appease a fascist, so now she's going to bankroll a bunch of lawsuits anyway through the JK Rowling Women's Fund.*
You can read an archived version of the report here, please save it and share it.
*Not so friendly reminder there is no way to engage in the wizard books without enabling this shit.
What the Republicans don't understand (because they're a cult) is that the Democrats aren't a cult. The Republicans are convinced that the Democrats are actually just as bad as them, if not worse, they just pretend otherwise. So Republicans are constantly trying to do "gotcha" questions to catch Democrats in the "lie" by asking them things that they would find unthinkable themselves.
The Republicans are a cult, they would support ANYONE if they ran as a Republican and oppose ANYONE running as a Democrat. And they can't comprehend of the idea of a political party operating any differently, so of course they think the Democrats are the same. They think that Democrats ONLY hate Trump because he's a Republican and they'd support him if he was a Democrat, regardless of his loathsome personality, colossal stupidity, and staggering bigotry.
But the Democrats and indeed, MOST political parties, don't operate as an insane cult of personality like the current-day Republicans do.
So I'm one of THOSE autistics who owns way too many baby name books for children I will never have and puts way too much thought into what fictional characters' names mean.
And just when I was thinking about making a post about it, @animorphs-30 popped up on my dashboard, which gave me a perfect excuse to make not just a post, but a piece about it.
... And now said piece is in a zine alongside people like Sol and Torren and all the other amazingly talented people (screams)
So before I completely lose my nerve, I present to you:
A-NAME-ORPHS
When writing an at-the-time contemporary story, it makes sense to give characters relatively common contemporary names; how many early millennials are called Jake? Or Melissa? Or David? Tom, Dick and Harry, anyone? However, that doesn’t mean that said common names can’t be surprisingly meaningful… or ironic.
Were these hidden meanings intentional on KAA’s part? Are they entirely coincidental names taken from the teen population of America in 1996? Can one read way too much into this? Yes, one can.
The Animorphs
Jake – a diminutive (short) form of the Hebrew name ‘Jacob’, meaning ‘supplanter’ or ‘one who takes over from another’; one who was not born into a position, but steps into it when needed. In the Biblical story (Genesis 25 & 27), Jacob “supplants” his older brother as firstborn and receiver of the Lord’s blessing. And, of course, Jake is the only human Animorph to reveal his surname; ‘Berenson’, an Ashkenazic/German name meaning ‘son of the bear’.
Rachel – right alongside Jake with a Hebrew name, meaning ‘ewe’ or ‘lamb’, symbolising innocence, purity, softness, fragility and harmlessness; all words for which Rachel would probably accost you for using to describe her. It is, however, among the top 15 most common names for girls of her age group; Rachel herself says “there are, at any given time, approximately five Rachels in my school.” She also says she doubts she was named for the Biblical Rachel (who is associated with Jacob) but given that most of her family also have Old Testament names (with the exception of Jordan, who has a New Testament name), your mileage may vary.
Tobias – another Hebrew name, this time meaning ‘God is good’. Tobias does have a significant relationship with a godlike being, but whether said relationship or said being is “good” is open to interpretation.
Cassie – a diminutive name that can be short for ‘Catherine’ (fitting for the character Ms Applegate most identified with), ‘Cassidy’ (lampshaded by The Unexpected) and, most commonly, ‘Cassandra’. Cassandra was, of course, the mythological princess of Troy during the Trojan War, blessed by Apollo with the gift of prophecy, but cursed to never have her warnings believed. She was one of few who survived said war, though her fate was far from pleasant.
Marco – a Hispanic variation of ‘Marcus’, a follower of Mars, Roman god of war; the only Animorph with a particularly warrior-like name, despite being the one most reluctant to get into the fight. Mars also had the title of Ultor, ‘the avenger’, during the reign of Augustus Caesar; comic books aside, this could relate to his “ruthless” pursuit of his mother’s freedom, even at the cost of her life.
Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill – being from an alien culture, we never find out the in-universe etymology of Aximili’s name. However, we do know his family name is a reference to the location of Esgaroth, or Lake-Town, from The Hobbit. ‘Esgaroth’ is of uncertain meaning (Tolkien himself said the word had “escaped” his own mythology and nomenclature) but often associated with the lake it’s built upon. ‘Aximili’ is only a few letters short of ‘Maximilian’ (lampshaded by the Animorphs TV show, where his human alias is ‘Max’), a Latin name meaning ‘greatest’; Ax progresses through the series from a young, idealistic but “unimportant” aristh stuck in the shadow of his brother to “THE Aximili” of great renown. His alias in The Alien is also of note; despite the thus-far Hebrew names of the family he is supposedly “cousins” with, ‘Phillip’ is a Greek name, meaning ‘lover of horses’. Centaur-like or not, intentionalon the Animorphs’ part or not… that’s a little distasteful, isn’t it?
Family, Friends and Enemies
Tom – most commonly known as a diminutive for ‘Thomas’, an Aramaic name meaning ‘twin’. Tom is not a twin biologically, but is one in a tragic sense; with very few exceptions, every time Tom appears in the series, there are, in fact, two characters present: the human being and the Yeerk pretending to be him. On its own, ‘Tom’ is also a name in Hebrew, like much of his family, meaning ‘innocence’ (being an innocent victim of circumstance and a single poor decision) or simply ‘the end’ (being a more important, and impactful, player in the end of the war than even Visser One).
Visser Three – ‘Mr. Visser’ is not as egregious an alias as you might expect; it’s a real surname! It’s the Dutch variation of ‘Fisher’, and among the top 10 most common surnames in the Netherlands, which would have gotten very awkward after the war. As for his alias in The Pretender, ‘Aria’, an aria is a type of musical performance most commonly, but not exclusively, found in opera; the plot comes to a halt, while a specific character performs a solo, meant to give insight into the character’s mindset while demonstrating the vocal skill of the performer. It’s dramatic, it’s attention-drawing, and it’s a performance, which is all Aria really is.
Hedrick Chapman – an odd one. In The Warning, his name is on the list of known Controllers provided by the online rebellion, but Marco waves it off as a common enough name to refer to someone else. If it were just ‘Mr. Chapman’, sure, but that little information is a bit vague for an identification list from a city-and-beyond-wide online group. And ‘Hedrick’ is far from a common given name. It could be a variation of the Dutch name ‘Hendrick’, meaning ‘ruler of the home’ (much to his daughter’s detriment), or the German surname ‘Hedrich’, from ‘Hadu’ meaning ‘battle or strife’ and ‘Rich’ meaning ‘ruler or king’. As for ‘Chapman’? An old English name meaning ‘tradesperson’; a trade, he would later come to regret.
Melissa – an even more common name amongst their age group than Rachel, ‘Melissa’ is a Greek name meaning ‘honeybee’, symbolising hard work (rewarding or otherwise), purity, and prophecy. A honeybee can sting to protect its hive, but it would sacrifice its life in the process; not that it would be missed, as there are always many more.
Eva – a Latin variation of Eve, the original mother figure and original woman of misfortune (Biblically, that is). It means ‘life’ or ‘breath’, but is also associated with the mythological snake that manipulated the first humans with the promise of knowledge; Eva is one of the first humans to gain knowledge of the wider galaxy, through the manipulation of Edriss 562.
Jara Hamee – another extraterrestrial name, but with surprisingly many meanings here on Earth. As it is, ‘Jara’ is a girl’s name meaning ‘(season of) spring’ in Slavic (The Change is very spring-coded, even if not explicitly set in spring), ‘fierce and energetic’ in Slovak (the Hork-Bajir are often mistaken as fierce), and ‘freedom or release’ in Basque (no explanation required). Spelled ‘Jarah’, it is a boy’s name meaning ‘to wound or hurt’ in Arabic (another mistaken assumption of the Hork-Bajir). Spelled ‘Jarrah’, it becomes the name of a tree from Australia known for its rich red, durable and parasite-resistant wood, and fibrous bark. Jake also gives an interesting homophone when he mishears ‘Jara Hamee’ as ‘Jeremy’; a form of ‘Jeremiah’, this is another Hebrew name meaning ‘appointed by God’, as one of the two “appointed” by the Ellimist to free their people.
Alan Fangor – ‘Alan’ is a Gaelic name with meanings like ‘handsome’ (which someone with a frolis manoeuvred morph would likely be), ‘harmonious/peaceful’ (being what he ultimately wants), ‘cheerful’, ‘noble’ and ‘steadfast’ (your mileage may vary). ‘Fangor’ is likely named for Fangorn forest of The Lord of the Rings, meaning ‘tree beard’ in Sindarin. Fangorn forest has other in-universe names, including ‘Ambaróna’, meaning ‘dawn’ or ‘eastern uprising’.
Loren – a variation of Lauren, meaning ‘crown of laurel’, symbolising victory and honour. It is also potentially another sneaky Tolkienreference, this time from The Silmarillion, where the garden of ‘Lorien’ is the most beautiful place in Arda, home to the spirits of visions and dreams, and meaning ‘land of dreams’ in Quenya. Life with Loren is something of a dream for Elfangor, one that he eventually has to wake from.
David – a Hebrew name, like that of half of the Animorphs, meaning ‘beloved, adored one’, suiting his spoiled and self-serving attitude. It is also the name of the cover artist David Mattingly, and amongst the top 5 most common names for boys of his age group.
Edriss 562 – a rare Yeerk name with earthly connotations, being a spelling variation of ‘Edris’, meaning ‘studious’ in Arabic (referring to Edriss’s “study” of humans before the invasion), or of ‘Idris’, meaning ‘lord’ or in Welsh (Lord Idris the Giant was a 7th century Welsh king known for, amongst other things, his astronomy).
Taylor – a quintessential “popular girl” name, though more popular amongst preteens at the time. Meaning, succinctly, ‘tailor’, the word itself is derived from French ‘tailleur’ meaning ‘to cut’. A subtle, if apt, implication.
Other Supporting Cast
Alloran-Semitur-Corrass – another Tolkien reference, this time to Gandalf’s alternate name ‘Olórin’, meaning ‘vision/of mind’ in Quenya. Alternatively, it’s also a letter short of the Irish surname ‘Halloran’, meaning ‘stranger from across the sea’. Or galaxy, as the case may be.
Erek King and the Chee –being named for a real-life kid of the time, the meaning behind ‘Erek’ is unlikely to be intentional; it is however, somewhat apt. A variation of the Norse name ‘Eric’, it means ‘powerful, eternal ruler’, and Erek is the leader of the powerful and eternal Chee. Other Chee are named ‘Jenny’, meaning ‘white and smooth’ in Cornish (and what does the Chee’s actual form look like?), ‘Maria’, meaning ‘bitterness’ or ‘star of the sea’ in latinised Hebrew (the most bitter of Erek’s leadership, and the Chee’s “starship” is hidden in the sea), and ‘Lourdes’, a location in southern France so antiquated (dating to prehistoric times) the actual meaning of the name is uncertain, but is associated with St Bernadette of Lourdes, and her visions of the Virgin Mary (from whom ‘Maria’ is derived).
Karen – another variation, this time Danish, of ‘Katherine’, meaning ‘pure’. In Japanese, it means ‘lotus’, symbolising inner strength and integrity, and again, purity, being able to grow beautiful flowers even out of muddy water.
Estrid-Corill-Darrath – a variation of the Norse name ‘Astrid’, meaning ‘divine beauty’. Is beautiful. Plays God.
James and the Auxiliaries – ‘James’ is another variation of ‘Jacob’, thus having the same meaning as Jake; ‘supplanter’, one who was not born into a position, but steps into it when needed. Most of the other Auxiliaries (though not all) also have evocative names, including ‘Collette’ (‘victory of the people’), ‘Kelly’ (‘warrior’), ‘Timmy’ (‘honour’)/Tuan (‘to die for a cause’), ‘Pedro’ and ‘Craig’ (‘rock’, associated with steadfastness), ‘Erica’ (‘brave and powerful’), ‘Liam’ (‘determined protector’), ‘Ray’ (‘wise protector’) and Tricia (‘noble’).
Bibliography
Alexander, Kirsten. The Penguin Book of Names for Australian Babies. Penguin Group Australia, 2005.
“Browse Surnames – Behind the Name.” Behindthename.com, 2019, surnames.behindthename.com/names/list.
“The Meaning and History of First Names – Behind the Name.” Behindthename.com, 2019, www.behindthename.com/.
Cooper, Lori. 75,000+ Baby Names for the 21st Century. 2001. Australia, Lothian Children’s Books, 2005.
Dictionary of First Names. 2000. Scotland, Geddes & Grosset, 2002.
“First Name & Last Name Origins & Meanings – Ancestry®.com.au.” Ancestry.com.au, 2021, www.ancestry.com.au/name-meaning.
Grant, Michael, and John Hazel. Who’s Who in Classical Mythology. 1973. London/New York, Routledge, 2006.
The Land Before Time XI: Invasion of the Tinysauruses
Last Time: The prophecy fortold of a time where the Chosen One, Littlefoot of The Gang, would lead a tribe of Longnecks across swamps and deserts to the promised land, the fated ritual site of the Big-Ass Crater. There, the Chosen One would reunite with his deadbeat dad, befriend an asshole street kid, and then save the world by staring directly at a solar eclipse.
This Time: The Dreaded. I've mentioned before how much I hate this film. Invasion of the Tinysauruses is the last Land Before Time movie I watched, and it was so bad it made me give up on the franchise. I watched some of the tv show, but that was several years later, out of nostalgia. And then the tv show was bad enough to make me give up on the franchise again until now.
HOWEVER, I do remember 11 having some interesting subplots and themes. I want to give this film a second chance, see if revisiting it with a critical eye changes my overall opinion. And if it doesn't, well, I can at least roast how fucking terrible it is.
The Universal Logo is still not Pangaea.
The movie begins in space, with meteors flying by. A large blue sphere moves into frame.
Narrator: "Our vast universe is filled with objects of incredible size. Objects separated by distances too great to measure."
The camera zooms back, revealing the blue sphere is actually a proton forming the nucleus of an atom. The "meteor" was an electron. The camera continues zooming back and we see more atoms.
Narrator: "But it's also made up of many millions of particles far too small to see. And these tiny things are just as important to life as the large ones."
The camera zooms back to the cellular level, then further back to reveal a leaf, attached to a small fern.
Narrator: "Many eons ago, dinosaurs ruled our planet. Most of them were huge. But among these giants lived tiny creatures. Dinosaurs the size of kittens."
No, there weren't. There are dinosaurs that small nowadays, we call them "songbirds", but if we're not counting birds then there were no dinosaurs that small. Even the smallest sauropods were still the size of big horses, the smallest hadrosaurs were the size of bears, the smallest ankylosaur was the size of a crocodile, and the smallest ornithopods and tyrannosaurs were the size of big dogs.
The closest dinosaurs have ever gotten to being "kitten-sized" are Aquilops and Microraptor, the smallest ceratopsian and raptor, which were around the size of an adult housecat or a hawk. There were no kitten-sized dinosaurs. Remember that. It's important for later.
Anyway, the narrator goes on to say that small creatures can be overlooked, but small things are important. And the dinosaurs in the Great Valley understood that, since there are currently some small delicious flowers that only bloom once in a long time.
The Gang (minus Cera) are gazing at the tree and practically salivating over how good the Tree Sweets look, smell, and taste. Ducky thinks they look ripe enough and wants to eat one, but Littlefoot scolds her and says they have to wait until Nibbling Day, when everyone will eat from the tree. While he's scolding her, Spike tries to sneak one, but then Littlefoot notices and calls out Spike.
Littlefoot is voiced in this movie by Aaron Spann. His most major roles are this and Yoshiya Kiryu in The World Ends With You. And Aaron does not do a good job here. Littlefoot's voice sounds bad.
Petrie has a suggestion.
Petrie: "Me get what you say 'bout bein' fair and all, but me thinkin' all the time, all the time thinkin', and me think this! If me fly up to tippy-tippy top of Tree Sweet tree and take Tree Sweets from tree for me and you three, then we okay, see?"
Littlefoot: "... say that again?"
Petrie: "Uh... no. Me just get 'em!"
He's saying that no-one will notice if a few go missing off the top. Petrie flies high up over the tree and then dives down, but before he reaches the tree, Cera's dad yells at him from off-screen. Petrie flails mid-air and swerves, crashing into Ducky and Spike on the ground.
Cera is with her dad, and she laughs at them. Her dad demands to know what he was doing, and Petrie makes up an excuse about chasing off a flying pointy-bottomed stinger. Cera's dad buys it, and makes sure they know that everyone has been waiting a long time to eat those Tree Sweets, so he's decided to be responsible for making sure every single one of them is still on the tree when Nibbling Day comes.
You can always count on Cera's dad for being a hard-ass with food rationing. That's some good consistency.
He leaves, and Cera rubs in that he caught them. And when Nibbling Day comes, she'll get the first one, because she discovered the tree in the first place! The others disagree. The way they remember it, shown via flashback, The Gang were wandering through the Great Valley one day when Littlefoot saw the Tree Sweet Tree. He ran up to it and stretched up, but he couldn't quite reach, and Cera jumped on his back and ate it before him!
Okay, so they're not retroactively saying this is something that has been around the whole time, like with Mr. Thicknose. I mean, it has, but they hadn't discovered it until recently. Nibbling Day is a recent thing.
Cera concedes but since her pride is hurt, she lashes out.
Cera: "Heh, I guess you're right. Littlefoot should have had the first Tree Sweet. He was just too... little."
Littlefoot: "Huh? What?"
Cera: "Oh, I don't mean little exactly, you know: short, small, whatever."
Littlefoot (perplexed): "You- you think I'm small?"
Cera: "Come on, don't take it so personally! I'm just saying you're not exactly normal-size for a Longneck, are you?"
Littlefoot: "I'm... uh, I'm still growing!"
Cera: "Ohhh, is that what's happening? Huh! It's taking a while, isn't it? So long Little Foot, ha ha ha ha, heh heh heh heh!"
Ironic that she tells Littlefoot not to take this personally, since she obviously shifted to bullying Littlefoot over his height because she took the others disagreeing with her side of the narrative personally. Also, she's just wrong. Last movie had Shorty, another Longneck kid, and they were the exact same size. And she's weirdly out-of-character. I could maybe buy movie 1 Cera bullying Littlefoot like this, but movie 11?! She sang "I'll see you in my dreams" at the end of the last movie! She's acting like Hyp here, especially the laughing as she walks away.
Ducky and Petrie try to cheer up Littlefoot, but do it badly, just making him feel worse. He flinches at the sound of his own name. This is weird to me, because it's the two smallest members of The Gang encouraging the biggest member that he's not small. Like, Petrie's not going to grow very big as an adult, sure, but what's Ducky's excuse for still being tiny?
Over with Cera's dad, he runs into a female Threehorn named Tria and they seem to know each other, they're surprised to see each other again. Tria calls him Topsy, and is immediately flirtatious, talking about how handsome he still is. "Topsy" is very flustered and nervous. He gets so flustered that when he turns around, he stabs his horn into a tree and gets stuck!
Now's as good a time as any to talk about this. Cera's dad was credited as "Daddy Topps" in the credits for the first movie (obviously derived from Triceratops). I was avoiding using that name until it came up in-universe, so I was surprised to hear "Topsy" used before that name. I have to wonder if Topps is ever actually used in the franchise. Topsy definitely sounds like a cutesy nickname for Topps, but it's not quite the same. For now, I'll call him "Topsy" because I think it's funny, but if they ever use "Topps" proper, I'll switch to that.
Coming back, Cera grumbles about eating the first Tree Sweet, then hears her dad say "of course you can have the first Tree Sweet" and she thinks he's talking to her until she hears Tria talking back. Cera calls out and Topsy hurriedly whispers that they should get together later. Tria gets the hint and saunters off before Cera arrives. Cera questions who he was talking to and Topsy deflects, suggesting they go to the watering hole together and have some father-daughter bonding time. She's still suspicious, but goes along with it.
The animation in this movie is VERY cartoony, with a LOT of squash and stretch. It really doesn't fit.
Littlefoot returns home, grumbling about what Cera said. He tries to climb a rock, but can't quite reach. Grandpa pushes him up with his head.
Littlefoot (angrily): "What's the matter, you think I'm too small or something? Can't make it on my own?"
Grandpa (chuckling): "Why no, Littlefoot. That's not it at all!"
Littlefoot: "Well, you'd be right. I am small."
Grandpa: "Perhaps, for now. But you'll grow!"
Grandma: "Of course you will, Littlefoot. Just think how big your dad is, and your grandfather. Why, he was once your size, and look at him now!"
Yeah, just look at his big-ol' off-model face! Good call-back to Bron, though, since he was introduced last movie.
Littlefoot is surprised at that, and Grandpa confirms that he was that exact size as a kid.
Grandma: "Not by your age, of course."
Grandpa: "Eh, well, noooo, eh, by your age I had grown..."
Littlefoot: *gasp* "... thanks..."
Grandpa promises that he will grow as Littlefoot sadly walks away.
Huh, so Littlefoot actually IS a late bloomer, Cera wasn't making shit up. Maybe Shorty was a bit younger than Littlefoot. Man, that legit sucks, considering we've still got 3 more movies and a whole tv show to go, and Littlefoot's design isn't going to change at all.
Littlefoot walks over to the Tree Sweet tree, on a ledge over it, and decides that he's feeling so bad that he's just gonna steal one of the Tree Sweets. He reaches out, part of the ledge crumbles, and he falls off into the tree! He falls through the tree, hitting branch after branch on the way down, until he hits the ground and looks up to see that all of the leaves and Tree Sweets have fallen off! Every single one.
He then passes out.
He wakes up to see a tiny teal Longneck standing on his stomach. The tiny Longneck eats the Tree Sweet off his nose, and then Littlefoot sits up and sees a whole herd of multicolored tiny Longnecks eating the fallen Tree Sweets around him!
These are Mussasaurus (meaning "Mouse Lizard"). Previously assumed to be naturally tiny sauropods even as adults, they were later discovered to just be the baby forms of a much larger dinosaur. Paleontologists didn't make the connection because Mussasaurus grew from quadrupedal to bipedal as they grew up (bipedalism is rare for sauropods). The adult Mussasaurus was 26 feet long.
There were no kitten-sized dinosaurs.
Now, do I blame this movie for thinking these tiny sauropods actually existed, especially since the movie came out in 2005 and the discovery connecting these dinosaurs was only made in 2013?
(Said through gritted teeth) No, I don't blame the movie. They couldn't have known the whole premise of their film would be based on false information debunked 8 years later. Even though the adult Mussasaurus was first discovered in 1980...
Do I still think the writers just looking up "weird dinosaurs", finding these tiny-ass sauropods, and then made a full-length movie centering its entire plot around the Mussasaurus without even questioning its potential validity is incredibly fuck-stupid?
YES, yes I do!!
Am I suggesting that the writers for this animated kid's movie should have done enough professional research to make a scientific breakthrough 8 years early and completely torpedo their own movie idea, scrapping it? Maybe! Probably not, but maybe.
Am I still going to mercilessly make fun of this movie for being wrong in this aspect? YES, yes I am! Will this egregious inaccuracy hurt my final score of the movie?... Yes. Yes it will.
Also, it's really lazy that the Tinysauruses have the same exact design as Littlefoot, just smaller and in multiple colors. Especially after last movie had such a wide variety of unique sauropod designs.
Anyway, Littlefoot screams in terror at the army of Mini-Mes and they all scatter, leaving no Tree Sweets behind in their wake. He gasps when he sees someone coming, and runs away. Topsy and Tria walk out of the forest.
Tria: "Did you hear something?"
Topsy: "Just a Flyer."
Tria: "If you say so, big fella. But it sure sounded to me like somebody screaming."
Topsy: "Naahhh, what would anybody have to scream about on a beautiful day like today?" *he sees the barren Tree Sweet tree* "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
Topsy's scream is so loud it alerts all the other dinosaurs in the Great Valley and creates a small rockslide. Grandma and Grandpa hear, and Grandpa rolls his eyes at Mr. Threehorn getting riled up again.
Later, everyone is gathered around the Tree Sweet tree. Cera is pissed she's not gonna get the first one. Topsy laments the loss of all those delicious Tree Sweets, then accuses someone in the crowd of stealing them.
Tria: "Well, I was sure looking forward to eating one of those Tree Sweets because... well because, Topsy here promised me the very first one! Didn't you, handsome?"
Topsy: *nondescript blushing grunts*
Petrie: "... did her say 'Topsy'? Ewwww!" *Cera hits him with her tail* "DOH! What's the matter with-"
Littlefoot: "I DIDN'T DO IT! YOU HEAR ME? I DIDN'T DO IT!"
Everyone immediately turns to stare at Littlefoot. Tria recognizes him, she saw him running away from the tree. Littlefoot defends himself that he didn't eat the Tree Sweets, a ton of tiny Longnecks did! Littlefoot was just passing by, and he ran to get help! Nobody believes him, EVERYONE laughs at him, and Cera comments that he's in big trouble. But then Topsy stops laughing when he looks down and sees a fragment of a petal with tiny bite marks on them, too small even for Littlefoot!
Topsy immediately pivots with all the grace of a prima ballerina to the subject of racism, getting everyone riled up about the tiny pests eating their food, which starts song 1 of the movie, Creepy Crawlies.
Okay, there's not much to say about this song itself, it's repetitive, boring, and shallow. It sucks. It brings back the racism theme with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer and turns the whole Great Valley into a lynch mob. Like this is basically The Mob Song from Beauty and the Beast but 10 times worse. I get the point of the song, I just think it does it poorly. But there is a lot to talk about around the song.
Like, for some reason, the official youtube upload cuts out a dialogue scene right in the middle, between the adult section and the kid section. That dialogue scene has Topsy decide they need to hunt them down and exterminate them! Grandpa advocates for them, saying they have just as much of a right to live here and eat the Tree Sweets as we do. Which gets him pushback from everyone, even Grandma argues against that! They all split up to search, and Tria goes with Topsy. He asks Cera if she wants to search with him, since they need to talk, but she rejects him to search with Littlefoot.
And there's a Rainbow Face singing with them?! But this obviously isn't one of the two from 7, he's got a different voice, and there's NO WAY the Rainbow Faces from 7 would be against tiny creatures living among us. 1, they would already know about them and have made contact. 2, if they didn't, they would be ECSTATIC to make contact with an undiscovered civilization. So I guess not all Gallimimuses are aliens? Or the writers just didn't care. Either way, it shows a flagrant disregard for continuity.
Also, I can't help but laugh at Grandpa saying that everything has a role to play, when the Tinysauruses aren't even real dinosaurs, they DON'T have a real place in the ecosystem! I can already tell that prehistorical inaccuracy is going to DESTROY that message of the movie in my eyes.
After the song, the adults are searching and making fools of themselves. A couple of parasaurolophuses bonk heads searching tall grass. A Longneck mistakes her tail for a creature and chases it around a rock. A styracosaurus searches under a tree root and then gets his frill stuck. Ducky and Spike are having fun searching, but they don't think the grown-ups are very good at it. Or that Petrie can see much when he's flying super high up.
Sure enough, Petrie (from above the clouds) sees a tiny Longneck and dives down to catch it, like a peregrine falcon zooming down toward his prey!
He had this same problem with a boulder in 9, Petrie needs to get a handle on the idea that things look tiny when you're far away from them.
Littlefoot and Cera are looking under rocks. Well, Littlefoot is looking, Cera is pouting. Littlefoot is embellishing his story more and more, now they swarmed all over the tree, but Cera tells him to shut up. Littlefoot changes the subject to ask about the female Threehorn with her dad, and whether he likes her, and if she's gonna be Cera's new mom.
That sets Cera off. She snaps and full-on charges at Littlefoot, and he runs away! He hides behind a tree as she smashes through a bush next to it, and he apologizes for bringing it up. She tells him to never mention that again and then stomps away, clearly not interested in finding tiny Longnecks. Littlefoot wanders off, contemplating how he'd ever find something so little in a Valley this big, when he suddenly falls into a small hole in the ground!
He finds himself in a cave, not too far underground. He calls out for help, but then his ass starts talking.
???: "Would you get off, please?"
Littlefoot: "Huh? H-h-huh?"
???: "Do you mind?! I can't breathe!"
Littlefoot gets up and reveals a tiny green Longneck. It stretches.
???: "Ah! That's better!"
Littlefoot screams and runs away, leaving the tiny green Longneck confused.
???: "Was it something I said?"
Over with Cera, she's stomping and kicking rocks, but then hears some suspicious giggling. She finds Tria and her dad giggling and flirting at the edge of a cliff, looking romantically at the sunset and nuzzling horns. She demands to know if they found any tiny Longnecks. He stammers and studders and just lets out a "hi, honey".
Cera: "Hi."
Topsy: "Cera, here's somebody I've been wanting you to meet. She just migrated here after the cold time and uh, well, hehe, the funniest thing: we know each other! Oh, from a long time ago. I was a wild young fella, and she was the cutest, weh-"
Tria: "Cut it out."
They go back to giggling for a bit.
Topsy: "But so, um, anyway. Her name's Tria."
Tria: "Hello, Cera. Topsy's told me so much about you."
Cera: "Funny, he hasn't told me anything about you!"
Cera walks off. Topsy thinks that went well, and Tria looks at him like he's crazy.
Back with Littlefoot, he's sliding and running down a tunnel until he emerges in a cross-section of a bunch of tunnels. He looks up and sees the tiny smiling green Longneck. He stands up and sees more tiny Longnecks on various ledges. The green Longneck asks him not to run away again. Littlefoot worries they'll do something to him, and they all laugh with this really bad and creepy two-frame laugh animation, and comment that they can't do anything to him, since he's so huge. Littlefoot basks in being called huge for a bit.
The green Tinysaurus asks if he remembers him. He's the one who stood on Littlefoot's stomach and ate the Tree Sweet off his nose. Littlefoot denies it, saying it was some other Longneck. The green Tinysaurus is pretty sure, but accepts it. He introduces himself as Skitter, and Littlefoot introduces himself. The Tinysauruses all laugh at the idea of his feet being "little". Skitter introduces Rocky and his twin sister Dusty (the yellow and dark yellow ones standing behind him, on the first level). But he gets them mixed up, Dusty is the dark yellow one. Then he introduces Lizzie, the orange one on the right. He tries to introduce more, but then a booming voice interrupts him and they scram and tell Littlefoot to hide.
The booming voice is Big Daddy, who walks out and demands they show themselves. They do, but when Littlefoot shows himself, Big Daddy faints from shock.
Big Daddy is voiced by MICHEAL CLARKE DUNCAN!!! Stunt casting at its finest, folks! And it's not obvious in this shot, but Big Daddy is actually even smaller than the other Tinysauruses.
Wait a minute. I just noticed something. It's hard to tell because they're so small, but the Tinysauruses have two sets of nostrils. They have the dot nostrils at the top of their heads like Littlefoot, but they also have the little round nostrils that Chomper has. What the fuck? That's the only substantial difference from Littlefoot's base design (aside from Big Daddy's chin)? Two extra nostrils? Why?! The real mussasaurus didn't have four nostrils! I'm never gonna be able to unsee that. Just one more reason to hate these fuckin' Fraggle wannabes!
When Big Daddy wakes up, he accuses Littlefoot of telling the big ones about them. Skitter corrects him, it was actually a Longneck that looks like him, and Rocky and Dusty suggest that he's got a twin (oh great, we're doing a "liar revealed" plotline, I hate those). Big Daddy accepts it, but still scolds them for bringing him here. Big Daddy is especially disappointed in Lizzie, his own daughter.
Littlefoot responds that they didn't bring him here, he fell in, and the camera reveals the hole he fell through in the background. Wait, what? He ran through a bunch of tunnels! This was obviously a different room! The hole shouldn't be visible from here! Goddamnit, continuity guys!
Big Daddy laughs it off, since it's no-one's fault. But then he angrily announces that they're moving. The Tinysauruses complain, but he insists, since the big ones know they're here. Littlefoot says he won't tell, but Big Daddy insists they have to move, the big ones are looking for them so hard they haven't been able to sneak out at night to find food, they're starving.
Wait a minute, it's been multiple days?! Since when?! That doesn't even make sense! Cera just talked to her dad about Tria, did she not talk to him for multiple days?! Even though they sleep in the same nest?!
This is a plot hole. This is a full-on, actual-ass plot hole. Not just in continuity with another movie, but in continuity with itself. By the story we've been given until now, the Tinysauruses ate the Tree Sweets earlier today, their bellies should be full. But now, they're starving because they haven't been able to sneak out at night and eat for several days. This is a plot hole. And we're only 30 minutes in!
Littlefoot offers to help with their food problems, then climbs up that rock ramp on the right of the hole to leave since it's getting late. He pretends to sleep with his grandparents, then sneaks off to gather food, hiding from the patrols. He plucks a bush clean of leaves, then swats the pile into the hole. They thank him.
The next day, Littlefoot is sleeping in, and Petrie wakes him up because "the little Longnecks have striked again!" Topsy has gathered everyone to raise the alarm about them stealing the tree stars off this one little bush.
He demands that everyone redouble their efforts until they're found. Cera is watching, and Tria tries to talk to her about his good points and how she'd like to get to know both of them better. Cera yells at her and walks away. Petrie, Ducky, and Spike meet with Cera and tell her that her dad promised some sort of special treat for the first one to find them.
Cera: "Yeah? Like what?"
Ducky: "I do not know exactly, but ol' Topsy says-"
Cera headbutts Ducky and pins her to a wall!
Cera: "Don't EVER call my dad that again, GOT IT?!?!"
Ducky: "Yup."
Cera lets her go and stomps off. Later, The Gang are hunting for tiny Longnecks, when Littlefoot sees Skitter and Lizzie just out in the open, standing on a rock! He calls out a distraction and the others go after it, allowing the Tinysauruses to return to their hole with an acorn. Man, they should be better at stealth than that!
That night, Littlefoot gives them another pile of leaves. The next day, he falls asleep on Grandpa's head while browsing a treetop (Grandpa just thinks it's cute). That night, Topsy tries talking to Cera.
Topsy: "Cera, are you awake? Look, I'm- I- I- I- I don't, I um, it's just that... ohhh, this is so much harder than yelling. Look, Tria's an old friend, and she doesn't have anyone. She needs protection, and she's really nice. She- well, she likes me! And I like her."
Cera: "Mrgh, but I want things back the way they were before, when you didn't like anybody and nobody liked you!"
Topsy: "...I don't think things are ever going to be that way again."
Topsy goes off to bed while Cera sheds a few angry tears. After he goes to sleep, she sneaks off at night, complaining about Tria. She sees Littlefoot sneaking around, then goes to wake up Ducky. Ducky is initially terrified, cowering and insisting she didn't call Cera's dad "Topsy", but Cera just rolls her eyes and tells her to bring Spike. At Petrie's nest, Ducky climbs up but can't quite make it inside. To wake Petrie up and keep from falling, she grabs him and pulls him out of the nest!
Petrie (flapping like mad to stay aloft with Ducky holding on): "What. Is. Matter with you?!"
Ducky: "Cera was wondering if you could come down!"
Petrie: "Well, me think me have no choice!"
They fall to the ground.
Later, they see Littlefoot sweeping a pile of leaves and wonder what he's doing. Bringing a snack back to his grandparents? Collecting tree stars in his sleep? Nobody but Cera really cares. Spike trips over a rock and Littlefoot almost catches them, but he brushes the sound off. When The Gang look back, he's gone, and they investigate.
In the cave system, Littlefoot is with the Tinysauruses and Skitter looks up at a shadow.
Skitter: "Not again!"
Cera, Ducky, Spike, and Petrie all fall on top of him. Big Daddy questions what this is. Ducky and Petrie are amazed to see the "sneaky, mean little Longnecks", and Cera hears moaning from underneath her.
Cera (getting up): "'Scuse me!" *Skitter crawls out from under her* "Whoa, you are short, aren't you?"
Skitter: "I used to be taller!"
Ha! Okay, that's a good joke.
Petrie, Ducky, and Spike are excited to tell the grown-ups and get the special treat, but Littlefoot tells them not to. Cera agrees with Littlefoot, they WON'T tell on them. Big Daddy and Petrie are confused, and she explains that she's doing this specifically to spite her dad, and she doesn't care if he gets mad. Ducky is confused about whatever's going on between Cera and Topsy. Cera insists they're NOT going to tell him, and the little Longnecks don't need to worry. Big Daddy believes her, and the Tinysauruses celebrate!
God, this shot looks so fucking stupid. Sorry to ruin the moment, but the premise of this film is so dumb, and knowing how inaccurate it is makes it impossible to take seriously. Tiny Longnecks, pshaw!
The Tinysauruses offer to show them around, and Big Daddy wants to object, but he knows they're gonna do it anyway. Cera and Lizzie bond over having dads that get mad.
They gather in an open cave with a pool of water. Ducky and Petrie give the Tinysauruses water and aerial rides (I guess they're lighter than Ducky, since Petrie was struggling to fly with her just a couple scenes ago). And they slide down Littlefoot's tail. They have a lot of fun running around and playing, but Spike gets stuck in one of their tunnels. They try to get him through, but he sneezes backward and they collapse in a giggling fit.
Cera and Lizzie separate from the group and bond some more over their dads being grumpy and having no sense of humor, and getting the most mad when they're in trouble. This transitions into song 2 of the movie, Girls and Dads.
See what I was talking about earlier?! The Tinysauruses have two sets of nostrils, and it's really weird and distracting!
Aside from that, though, I kinda like this song. It's not great, but it's decent. The lyrics are kinda shallow, but I like the gospel choir, and the singing and character animation is solid.
That one bit where Lizzie walks into a stalagmite is really funny.
Still, I can't really relate to this song, neither being a girl nor having a dad. So I can't connect with it enough to rate it too high. I think a 6/10 is fair, it's above-average.
Afterward, Lizzie comments that she wishes he wouldn't worry so much, like if he had someone else to worry about, or someone else to help him worry about her, and Cera knows what she's talking about.
Oh, c'mon, we're back to this?! This was one of my few problems with the last movie, the implication that single parents are insufficient, and this movie's gonna double down on it?! Man, that song actually won me over a little, and now this has soured my mood again. It's such a bizarre message to push since Petrie and Ducky also have single parents. It's the norm here, rather than the exception.
The Gang climbs the rock to leave through the hole, exhausted and very sleepy. They promise to bring food and keep their secret safe.
Lizzie: "Bye, Cera! Don't worry so much daddy, we can trust them. Especially Cera!"
Big Daddy: "I hope you're right, Lizzie. But there's one thing you got to remember about the big ones: just because they're bigger, they think that makes them more important, and sometimes they forget about the little details. Like us."
WRONG! You guys aren't even a real species of dinosaur, you're not "little details"! The message of this movie is wrong!
Littlefoot returns to his grandparents, and it's almost dawn. He curls up to sleep, and Grandma almost immediately wakes him up. Ducky and Spike are sleepy, while their siblings run around. Spike falls asleep on top of her! (we've seen that bit before) Petrie is so sleepy he sleep-flies, crashing into a tree, then slides down and falls asleep on the roots. Cera falls asleep on a small tree, but then Tria wakes her up and it thwacks Cera in the face.
Tria: "Are you okay, honey? You look beat."
Cera: "I'm fine." *she walks away*
Tria: "Look, Cera. I have tried every way I know to be nice to you but you've shrugged me off. Fine! I'm a big girl, I can take it. But I like your dad, I always did and he likes me! And I think we're good for each other! And I could be good for you, too, if you'd let me. I could be someone who'd... help your dad worry about you, y'know? I was hoping we could be friends. But I guess that's up to you." *she walks away*
Cera: "...Tria, wait! Maybe we could give it a try. Being... friends."
This is a nice scene. I like Tria being assertive, but still kind. It really makes me wonder what happened in the past, though. Because, believe it or not, we've actually seen Cera's mom before. In movie 1:
She's the grey one, Cera's dad is the black one. She and Ducky's dad are both in the first movie. Cera's mom and dad reunite with her at the end of the film, and Ducky introduces Spike to both of her parents. But for some reason, between the first movie and the second, Cera's mom and Ducky's dad disappeared, and between the second movie and third, Cera's siblings disappeared, too. Petrie always had a single parent, and his siblings have appeared as recently as movie 7, so that's mostly fine.
Will this movie finally address Cera's mom? Probably not, but one can hope.
Whatever, back to movie 11. That night, Skitter and Lizzie are waiting for food. The Gang are intending to bring food back, but then Cera's dad discovers them and demands an explanation. Cera tries to turn it back on him, asking what's he's doing out so late. He stammers, but insists he's just doing guard duty, and the kids should be home, it's not safe out here with those little Longnecks. Cera claims they woudn't hurt anyone, and he questions why. She covers by pointing out the size difference, they're so small, they're probably harmless!
Topsy: "It's the little ones you have to worry about. Now, shoo! Skedaddle! Back home, all of you! Don't let me catch you out this late again! Now MOVE!"
He stomps on the ground and they get the message, running away. In the cave, Lizzie gets tired of waiting and leaves. Skitter follows her. Big Daddy just barely missed them.
Up top, Topsy hears a noise and calls out, but it's just Tria. He repeats what he said to Cera, it's not safe for her with these creatures. She tells him to lighten up and "you can't blame a girl for trying, walk me back?" He accepts and starts to, but then suddenly decides to turn around and return to guarding, right when Lizzie tries to run behind him! They're both frozen, mouths wide open in shock, but Tria thinks it's adorable. Skitter runs after Lizzie, but he trips on a vine and topples into her, snapping Topsy out of it! He chases after them, ignoring Tria's cries to leave them alone!
Wow, Tria. Just because they're cute you switch sides that easily? You were all-in on hunting them down in Creepy Crawlies. Seems kind shallow.
They jump down the hole and Topsy gets his head stuck in it. Tria is happy they got away, and Topsy shoots her a glare.
Later that same night, he's gathered everyone and tells the story of how he chased the vicious vermin and found their lair! They're going to destroy it and them forever! Tria objects!
Tria: "Sure they're little but they're cute and frightened! We should just... leave them alone!"
Topsy: "If you don't know what you're talking about, you shouldn't talk at all!"
Tria: *gasp* "What?!"
An ankylosaur in the crowd suggests sealing up their hideout with rocks, and almost everyone agrees and heads over to the hole. Littlefoot begs his Grandpa to stop them, but he's not sure how. At the hole, Topsy and the ankylosaur push a giant rock on a cliff above the hole. Everyone is ranting, and Littlefoot begs them to listen to him, but they ignore him. Littlefoot runs up to the cliff and stands on top of the big rock as he yells something that will make them listen:
Littlefoot: "Stop, please! You're making a big mistake! I'm the one who took all the Tree Sweets off the Tree Sweet tree!"
Everyone is shocked to hear that.
Littlefoot: *gulp* "I didn't mean to! The tiny Longnecks ate the Tree Sweets, but they wouldn't have if I hadn't knocked them all off the tree. I was gonna tell the truth, but when I saw how mad everybody was, I got scared! So I blamed everything on the tiny Longnecks..."
The Tinysauruses are also listening to this, and they're just as shocked as everyone else by this confession. Except for Big Daddy, who knew the big ones couldn't be trusted.
Littlefoot finishes his speech by asserting that they're really nice, and he's sorry. This is meant to be the big turning point, the big "liar revealed" moment. But aside from my general dislike of that type of plot, it also doesn't hit for me because Littlefoot's voice actor completely fails to sell the scene. He's just a bad replacement.
Grandpa tells everyone to just go home, and they acquiesce. Topsy comes down the cliff and Tria's PISSED at him. Littlefoot comes down and The Gang are PISSED at him, too! The movie is saying these two things are equivalent. Grandpa picks up Littlefoot and right before they leave, the cliff under the big rock gives way, and the whole thing collapses on the hole!
Littlefoot and his grandparents are sad, but still leave. The camera zooms in ominously at a hole in the rocks, that little triangular hole just slightly upper-right of center.
Littlefoot's grandparents are asleep, but Littlefoot can't sleep. He walks away and sings song 3 of the movie: If Only.
The song has a good concept, but the execution is iffy. I really like the sunrise as a symbol. But the singing itself, both from Littlefoot and Grandpa, is a bit off. This is the first song Grandpa has had, and Kenneth Mars's singing voice is definitely different from his character voice, making it a bit distracting.
The message is a little muddy, too. Grandpa tells Littlefoot that lies get taller, but then when you lose your way, your troubles get bigger. So, like, lying isn't "losing your way", that's a separate beat? And then Grandpa tells Littlefoot that making mistakes is an important part of learning and growing, but then he says that if you follow your heart, you won't ever have regrets. Those two sentiments seem at odds to me.
And this song definitely feels too short. The pace is so slow, and the first 15 seconds and last 15 seconds barely count, leaving the song overall at like 1:45 with a 10-second break in the middle. It REALLY needed more time to cook with its message, especially for how epic it felt like it was trying to be.
After the song, we check in with the Tinysauruses. They're okay, but in a new tunnel created by the rockslide. Rocky and Dusty ask which direction they should go, and Big Daddy leads them away from the Great Valley.
Littlefoot goes to see Ducky, Petrie, and Spike, but they're all pissed off at him.
Littlefoot understands why everyone else would be mad at him, but not why they would be. Ducky and Petrie are having trouble finding the right words, and Littlefoot tells them to just lay it all out.
Ducky: "You messed up the tree-sweets tree, so I did not get any tree-sweets, and neither did anybody else."
Spike: "Uh-huh."
Petrie: "You make friends with tiny ones, but you make everybody mad at them, so they unhappy now, too! So why you make friends with them in the firstest place?"
Spike: "Uh-huh."
Ducky: "You made the grown-ups so mad that they knocked rocks down on the tiny little longnecks. So they are now covered up with rocks, and I do not think that is fair, either."
Petrie: "Plus! Spike eated all the bestest tree stars me found this morning!"
Littlefoot points out that wasn't him, and they agree they're done ranting and turn away from him again.
Littlefoot: "For folks who didn't think they could explain how they felt, you did a pretty good job... So is that it? You guys won't even talk to me?"
Petrie: "You hear somebody? Me no hear nobody."
Ducky: "I do not hear nobody either."
Littlefoot leaves, angry.
Fun fact: I broke my nose because of that "did you hear something" bit. Someone at high school did that to everyone, so I decided to do it to them, figuring that turnabout is fair play, and then they hit me in the face with a textbook.
Also, and this is a problem I had with the last couple scenes, too, but the reaction to the rocks falling on the Tinysauruses has been REALLY muted. Way too much of an underreaction from everyone on that point.
Cera walks up to Tria for a talk. She's worried Tria is mad at her, but Tria isn't. Tria's mad at Topsy, both for yelling at her and being so mean to the little Longnecks, apparently he didn't used to be so mean. Cera points out that her dad was planning to give Tria the first Tree Sweet, meaning the reason he was so harsh on the tiny Longnecks was because of how much he likes Tria. For some reason, Tria is flattered by this.
Speaking of the Tinysauruses, they've found the end of the tunnel, leading out into the Mysterious Beyond. A barren wasteland stretches out for miles in front of them.
Big Daddy: "...Well, at least we won't have big ones chasing us all the time!" *gasp at seeing two Sharpteeth* "Of course, I could be wrong. RUUUUUUN!"
The two Sharpteeth chase them into and through the cave! Dusty trips and Rocky runs back to push her up!
These two are Utahraptors, according to Wikipedia. I guess the idea is that the two biggest raptors are chasing the smallest sauropods (even though they're not even real, and the real smallest sauropods are bigger than Utahraptors). I do kinda like these tracking chase scenes, they've done this a couple times in this movie.
The Tinysauruses hide in some rocks and the Utahraptors run past them toward the Great Valley. The others are worried about their friends in the Great Valley, but Big Daddy dismisses their concerns. Littlefoot walks past the rockslide grumbling to himself, and after he passes, the Sharpteeth squeeze through the hole in the rockslide.
With The Gang, Petrie and Ducky are scolding each other for being mean to Littlefoot, and Spike takes Ducky's side that Petrie was the meanest. Petrie breaks out into tears, which makes Ducky and Spike start crying, and they become this big pathetic blubbering mess.
Cera: "Now, that's a disgusting sight!"
Agreed. She scolds them for wallowing in misery, telling them to find Littlefoot and apologize for being mean to him.
Petrie: "How- how come you so smart all of a sudden 'bout making things better?"
Cera: "I've just gotten some practice lately. Hey, there's Littlefoot now!"
She says, in response to seeing a shadow pass by behind a log. They run over, then the Sharpteeth jump out and chase them! The blue one jumps in front of Cera when Tria comes in from the side with a headbutt!
Tria tells Cera to run as it gets up and starts chasing again. The red one chases Ducky, but Littlefoot pulls back a branch and snaps it into the Sharptooth's face! Red gets up and continues chasing them as Ducky apologizes for what she said. Spike accidentally trips Red while running from Blue, but then he's cornered against a rock wall! Petrie defends Spike by pecking Blue in the face, but then flies backward into a tree branch, knocking himself out! Blue closes in, but then starts... laughing?
Lizzie and Skitter are on its back, tickling it! This is ridiculous. Over with Red, it charges at Tria as she stands her ground to protect the kids! But then, Topsy comes in to provide backup! He slams Red with his horns, sending Red flying! Over with Blue, it bites its own tail accidentally while knocking the little Longnecks off. Red and Blue converge and close in on the fallen Tinysauruses, and Spike and Petrie stand their ground to protect their friends!
Big Daddy: "Hey, you! Why don't you pick on somebody your own size?!"
That line doesn't even work here! The Tinysauruses swarm over the Sharpteeth and skeletonize them like piranhas in 5 seconds flat moderately annoy them.
The Sharpteeth panic and run into each other, knocking all the Tinysauruses off. They then try to eat the delicious buffet that has been served up to them.
Topsy: "Hang on little ones!" *sigh* "I'm coming!"
Topsy faces off against both Sharpteeth, protecting the kids and Tinysauruses behind him as they split up to approach from either side.
And apparently Petrie's feeling up to protecting everyone with Topsy? He's right up in front. Huh.
But before something actually cool could happen, we hear a cacophony of yelling from all the other grown-ups coming in. The Sharpteeth run away from the stampede. Later, Grandpa and the ankylosaur push another rock down to block off the hole in the rockslide (I'm starting to think that ankylosaur just likes pushing rocks). Littlefoot's surprised the Tinysauruses came back, and Skitter responds that they're friends!
Topsy: "I'm uh, well, I'm sorry for all the trouble that I caused."
Big Daddy: "Hey, you're a dad. That's what we do! But you also saved my daughter's life, and for that, I'm grateful."
Tria: "Way to go, Topsy. You're the big hero!"
Just in case his actions were too subtle for the viewing audience, Tria spells out what we're supposed to think. And apparently "what dads do" is lead genocidal campaigns for several days on-end. TIL. And because I'm not done making fun of this scene, no, Big Daddy. Topsy did not save your daughter. YOU saved your daughter. Topsy saved YOU. Get it straight.
Grandpa: "I'm sorry we had to seal up that new tunnel. We don't want any Sharpteeth getting back in."
Littlefoot: "Great, that means you've gotta stay!"
Big Daddy: *sigh* "Well, I guess if we gotta, you know, we gotta..." *everyone looks sad* "Besides, who'd wanna leave friends like you?" *everyone laughs and is merry*
The next time the Tree Sweets bloom, all the dinosaurs gather for Nibbling Day (including the Tinysauruses).
Littlefoot reaches up and plucks the first Tree Sweet. He gives it to Cera, who gives it to Tria, who gives it to... Rocky? Odd choice. I would have gone with Lizzie.
Littlefoot: "Did you see, Grandpa?! I could reach! I'm bigger now!"
Grandpa: "Littlefoot, you grew bigger the day you stood up in front of everyone and admitted you were wrong."
Grandpa, not everything needs to be a "teachable moment", Littlefoot was talking literally, not metaphorically. And that was, like, months ago.
Grandpa grabs the top of the tree and shakes the Tree Sweets out, and everyone looks at the falling flowers in wonder and bites them out of the air.
Narrator: "And every Nibbling Day, the dinosaurs of the Great Valley gathered to celebrate these small things of life, which mattered so much."
During the credits, they play a remix of Creepy Crawlies sung by the Tinysauruses called Stupid Stompers.
This is weird. I compared Creepy Crawlies earlier to The Mob Song from Beauty and the Beast, but having this counterpoint makes it more like Savages from Pocahontas. Which isn't a good thing! Savages is MUCH worse than The Mob Song!
I'm guessing maybe they originally had this song in the movie but didn't have a good place for it, so they cut it but liked it too much to cut entirely? It muddies the racism theme more, making it more of a "both sides have prejudices" angle, instead of the Tinysauruses just being oppressed.
As a song, it's still bad, but I think I like it a little better than Creepy Crawlies. However, everything around it is worse and it doesn't even have any visuals, so it gets the same score, 2/10. It spits on the happy ending of togetherness we just got, ending the film on a sour note.
This movie references 3 a lot. Cera's dad is the main antagonist for much of the story and gets a lot of development. Cera is paralleled with another kid whose dad is harsh and mean (Hyp/Lizzie). There's a tacked-on action climax with raptor Sharpteeth. It ends with the Great Valley coming together for a holiday of sharing with each other, and the specific bit of handing food from one dinosaur to the next happened in 3 as well.
But it's MUCH worse than 3.
It brought back the racism theme to the forefront, after it was in the background for 5 films. That's... something, I guess. Topsy is honestly great in this movie, both sensitive and fascist. The whole Tria subplot is fantastic, a lot of honest emotions and conversations come through. But it ends too gently, too nicely. 3 had Cera's dad do a whole speech admitting fault and showing understanding in where he went wrong, this one just has a short apology that gets brushed under the rug by the victims he was terrorizing.
Cera is weirdly mean and out-of-character, even before knowing about Tria gives her an excuse.
Using a Rainbow Face as a bigoted and ignorant crowd extra in Creepy Crawlies shows a STAGGERING level of disregard for the themes and story of 7.
Bringing back the implication that single parents are insufficient from 10 really bothers me.
The pacing is fine. A little slow overall, but no major hiccups. The movie introduces the Tinysauruses pretty early on, and they're the main draw. It doesn't have the "halfway point" issue.
Girls and Dads is the only decent song here. Creepy Crawlers/Stupid Stompers straight-up sucks, and If Only has a good concept but poor execution.
As characters, the Tinysauruses aren't AS annoying as they COULD have been. They ARE annoying, but they're not as bad as Dana and Dinah or Ozzy and Strut. They're more on the level of Tippy. That is, pretty annoying and making every scene they're in worse, but ultimately harmless. Not inspiring hate, just dislike.
Supposedly, the Tree Sweet tree and Tinysauruses have always lived in the Great Valley the whole time, just tucked away in their little corner and undiscovered until now. Except it doesn't make sense.
What about 3? There was a long drought followed by a massive fire and then a flood, and afterward all the dinosaurs worked together to search every square inch of the Great Valley and discover as many green food sources as they could.
What about 5? Locusts ate all the green food in the Great Valley, and everyone had to relocate until it grew back.
What about 8? A blizzard destroyed all the green food in the Great Valley, and everyone had to relocate until it grew back.
What about 9? There was a ton of flooding in the Great Valley due to nonstop rain.
I thought they were going to have some sort of connection between the Tinysauruses and the Tree Sweet tree, like it's their main source of food and they're the primary pollinators of it, or something like that. But nope. No connection is ever drawn, they just happen to live nearby. In fact, the whole "everything has its place in nature and little things are important" theme doesn't really go anywhere. They never address WHY the Tinysauruses are important to the ecosystem, despite multiple lines implying they are.
The Utahraptor Sharpteeth are a little funny in how pathetic they are, but not in a way that was intentional, like the Sarcosuchus was in 10. We're definitely supposed to take these Sharpteeth seriously, even though they get clowned on over and over again.
It's funny how Topsy and Big Daddy are such important characters, given that both of them have fucking ridiculous names in this film. Seriously, it was SO hard to keep a straight face writing "Topsy" and "Big Daddy" every time!
Spike is honestly pretty good in this film. Very expressive and involved. Petrie's pretty good, too.
Pros: The pacing is okay. Topsy is great. Tria's subplot is fantastic. One song is decent.
Cons: Mussasaurus wasn't like that! The Tinysauruses are annoying. Wasted potential, as far as themes go. The other songs suck. Previous movies make the premise questionable. I hate "liar revealed" stories. Littlefoot's voice is bad. There's a plot hole. The characters don't care enough about the rockslide. The Sharpteeth are lame. The fuckin' double nostrils!
Score: As a movie, divorced from outside context, I'd give it a 3/10. It has slightly more good things going for it than 6 did. But like I said before, the egregious Mussasaurus inaccuracy hurts my overall final score, so I'm dropping it down to a 2/10.
The Land Before Time: 8/10 (hypothetical uncut version: 9/10)
The Land Before Time X: The Great Longneck Migration
Last Time: The Gang Freed Willy.
This Time: 10 was the big 15th anniversary film in 2003. They promoted the hell out of this one, with DVD re-releases of the prior films, anniversary merch, and Land Before Time events at Universal theme parts.
I remember watching this and just thinking it was good, but some people say it's the best in the series. Let's see which opinion holds true (it'll be hard to beat 7 in my mind).
The Universal Logo is still not Pangaea.
The intro has the narrator introducing dinosaurs for the 10th time in this 15-year-old franchise based entirely around dinosaurs. I'm not bothering to quote him because it's nothing you haven't heard before. Blah-blah, millions of years, blah blah, ancient giants, blah.
While he's yammering on, though, we get ANOTHER CAMEO OF THE RAINBOW FACES!
They just. Run though the background like it's no big deal. Two of them, too. Like, their cameo in the last movie was just weird, this one has me convinced they either don't care the Rainbow Faces were aliens, or not all Gallimimuses are aliens, or the Rainbow Faces are actually supposed to be constantly beaming down and looking around.
None of the other dinosaurs in this intro montage share designs with specific dinosaurs from the series. Like, we see a Spiketail, but it's not Tippy's mom. We see a Flyer, but it's not Pterano. We see a couple of baby Threehorns, but they're not Dana and Dinah. But those are clearly the Rainbow Faces, their designs are exactly the same.
The narrator finishes his spiel by establishing that Dinosaurs did everything humans do, they fought, they played, they slept, and they might have even dreamed.
Littlefoot's dreaming about flying Longnecks and flying trees. In his dream, Littlefoot wakes up, and a mysterious force pulls up on his tail so that he's flying too. He follows the Longnecks, lands on a flying rock that spins around, then looks up as some menacing clouds cover the sky and spiral in toward the Great Circle, shrinking the light until it's just a pinprick illuminating Littlefoot's head and neck, and when Littlefoot looks up toward it, he squints his eyes with pain and sparkles appear in front of them.
We see Littlefoot's POV, and the Great Circle is darker, like a ball of fire, and then it flies toward Littlefoot!
Littlefoot wakes up screaming, then when he sees his grandparents are sleeping fine, he concludes it's just a Sleep Story and goes back to sleep. The camera pans over to his grandparents, and they suddenly get the same restless sleep, frowning and mumbling in their sleep.
Littlefoot's voice actor for this movie is a 13-year-old Alec Medlock, most known for playing Craig Ramirez in Drake and Josh, though he's currently a lawyer.
The Great Night Circle transitions into the Great Circle, and it's the next day. The Gang are playing tag together, and Ducky is "it". Well, to be more accurate, Littlefoot, Ducky, and Petrie are playing tag together. Spike and Cera are eating. Cera threatens Ducky when she tries to catch Cera, but then Littlefoot taunts her and she changes targets. Littlefoot stops when he sees the Great Circle, he's entranced by it and sees the same sparkles from his dream.
Ducky catches up, exhausted, and tags Littlefoot before collapsing. He doesn't even notice, he just keeps staring. The others catch up to Littlefoot and question why he's looking at the Great Circle instead of chasing them. Littlefoot responds that it's something he saw in his Sleep Story. This gets into a whole discussion of what the various kids dream about.
Ducky: "Yup, yup, yup! I have Sleep Stories all of the time, I love them! I see myself floating down wide waters covered with good-smelly flowers." *sniff, sigh*
Petrie: "Me have Sleepy Stories about flying way up over high hills and tall trees! Uh-hoo-hoo! Me bet me know what Spike have Sleep Stories about!"
Spike just chomps some clovers.
Littlefoot: "What about you, Cera? Don't you ever have Sleep Stories?"
Cera: "Threehorns never have Sleep Stories, they're for babies! They're all just full of dumb stuff that could never happen!"
Littlefoot (coy): "Hmmm. I guess you're right! In my Sleep Story last night, I saw you butt your head against this tall rock, and it split right in half!"
Cera (intrigued): "Really? I did that?"
Littlefoot: "Yeah, but, like you said: 'Sleep Stories are dumb', something like that could never really happen!"
Cera backpedals that not everything in a Sleep Story is dumb, but the others agree that's not what she said before, teasing her. Cera insists there's no rock in the Great Valley she can't break. The kids call her bluff. We have seen her destroy rocks in previous films, most notably in the first 4 movies (this is the first time in a while I've had an opportunity to say "Dinosaurs are Built Different"). So they'd have to point out a pretty big rock for her to be unable to crack it.
Littlefoot dares her to crack this rock.
You know, I think that actually might be bigger than any rock she's broken before. She destroyed that cave wall in 2, but the angle was kinda ambiguous what exactly she broke, it could have been a support structure, and it crumbled pretty quick. And the wall she busted down in 4 was a pile of big rocks, but all of them were individually smaller than this, and she didn't actually break any of them, just knocked them down.
Cera's hesitant, but the others egg her on, and she summons up her courage to give it a good solid try, a long charging headbutt!
It does not work.
This angle makes it clearer just how big this rock truly is. Most rocks she broke in 1 were around the same size of her, maybe a little bigger. This one is several times larger. I said movie 4 Cera could fight Captain America, well even Captain America couldn't punch a rock several times his size and break it. That's like an Iron Man-level feat.
Cera's head hurts, and she goes home. Littlefoot is sorry she hurt her head, but Petrie thinks she mainly hurt her "brag-bone".
That night, Littlefoot is having nightmares again, and he wakes up to Grandpa asking him what's wrong. Littlefoot just can't sleep.
Grandpa: "Ooh, neither can I, Littlefoot. And I think I know why. For some time now, I've been feeling restless, as if there's someplace I need to go but I- I- I don't know where."
Littlefoot: "Me too, Grandpa! Me too! That's just how I feel tonight!"
Grandpa: "I think this feeling has something to do with the Sleep Stories I've been having."
Littlefoot is interested, and Grandpa mentions that Grandma's also been having them, they've discussed it. He says they need to go on a journey. Littlefoot asks if it's just going to be them, but Grandpa includes Grandma and maybe others, too, but he gets the feeling they have to leave soon. He encourages Littlefoot to get some rest, he'll need it if they leave tomorrow.
The next day, Ducky and Petrie are wondering what kind of journey Littlefoot's talking about. Littlefoot suggests it could be an adventure.
Cera: "So let me get this straight: you've been having Sleep Stories so you're going on an adventure, but you don't know when, and you don't know where, and you don't know why, but you'll just sort of feel when it's time to leave and then you and your grandparents will just sort of wander off? Is that it?"
Littlefoot: "... yeah, that about sums it up!"
Cera: "Heh, I'm glad Threehorns don't have adventures like that!"
She leaves, snootily. The kids have been on plenty of adventures, but usually reactively, in response to something happening. Not just for no reason. And this is the second time Cera's used Threehorn racism in the movie, so I guess that theme is inexplicably still alive. Also, she might still have a grudge from yesterday.
The other kids are interested, though, and this leads into song 1 of the movie: Adventuring.
Hmm. I like the song, but it feels a little discordant with the fact this is movie 10. The song doesn't really address the fact they've gone on tons of adventures before this point, one way or another. It doesn't really imply they're inexperienced or experienced, either way. It does have a cameo from Mo, so that's an acknowledgement of continuity there. But I feel like one line about how much adventuring they've already done would make the song a lot better.
That said, I really like the imagination sequences in the song. This feels like Big Water turned up a notch, and it's a strong contrast against Imaginary Friend from last movie, which was unintentionally horrifying. This song doesn't just have monsters, it also has fun camera work, tons of landscape reorganization, and a callback to the flying Longnecks in Littlefoot's dream with him jumping on the clouds.
And by the end of the song, despite all the fears and dangers expressed, the gang is all-in on coming with Littlefoot on his adventure, even Cera, who thought it was a stupid reason. This feels like a big moment, they've been on plenty of adventures before, but this is the first time they've expressed a desire to go on an adventure for its own sake, for the fun of the adventure itself. Not to save someone.
So I dunno, I have kinda mixed feelings on this song. It can either be read as a song of some sheltered kids glorifying the idea of adventure, in which case it would be bad continuity, or it can be read as a song of seasoned adventurers discovering a love for the game for its own sake, in which case it would be good continuity. The former would be like a 7/10 (bad continuity wouldn't hurt the song too much) while the latter would be like a 9/10 (the ambiguity itself is still a flaw).
Personally, I interpret it as the latter (especially with the Mo cameo and the line about "you know you'll have to take us with you"), but I understand if others have more negative feelings on it.
After the song, Grandpa ducks his head down and tells him it's time. The three Longnecks leave the Valley, without the rest of the Gang. Apparently they weren't able to convince Grandpa to let them come with (fair, their parents DEFINITELY would have objected).
On the road, the three are walking through a misty area of rocky pillars, and Littlefoot is wondering if they're there yet. Grandpa says he'll know when they get there, and Littlefoot's happy "here" isn't "there", since here is so hazardous.
Then we see them walking through a swamp. This place is nicer, since there's food and water. Littlefoot starts hopping from rock to rock, and the grandparents spot the danger too late when Littlefoot is about to jump straight into the mouth of a Sarcosuchus crocodile! (not Dil, this one's a bit smaller)
Right before he gets eaten, a gigantic foot crushes the crocodile's entire body! Littlefoot and his grandparents look up at a MASSIVE Longneck, who lowers her head to complain to them about those things "nibbling on your feet".
This is Sue. She's a Supersaurus. Grandma asks how they can thank her, and she thinks Littlefoot is cute, but she doesn't need thanks. She stomps on bad guys for the fun of it, emphasizing how big her feet are while grinding her foot into the Sarcosuchus. Sue asks if she can join their group, since she thinks they're going the same direction. Grandpa accepts. As they leave, the Sarcosuchus surfaces, gasping for air and turning around to watch them go before returning to floating.
At night, they're still walking on, but Littlefoot is falling asleep on his feet. Sue picks him up on the tip of her tail and asks if he's been sleeping well, and when he asks how she knew that he isn't, she responds that she's been having the same Sleep Stories about the Great Circle. She speculates that Longnecks everywhere are having the same dream, and it's driving them to go on the same journey. Littlefoot falls asleep on her head as she sighs about how she'll inevitably be the tallest one there, like always.
Back at the Great Valley, Cera is having a nightmare about Littlefoot coming back and being revered as a hero. Everyone is celebrating, throwing flowers at him, and even her dad is chanting his name while he majestically bathes in a sunbeam. He grins at Cera and there's a twinkle in his teeth.
Cera: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Look. There is a perfectly normal, non-shippy justification for this scene. Cera doesn't want to be shown up. But if you WANT to look at this scene through the lens of shipping goggles, it's not HARD to. That's all I'm saying.
Cera wakes up with a start. She sees her dad, still asleep, then sneaks away. She wakes up Ducky and tells her they're going to go on Littlefoot's adventure. Ducky tries to wake up Spike, but he won't wake, even rolling over on top of Ducky. Cera brings over a branch and lures Spike away using it, and Ducky thinks he bent her beak. At Petrie's nest, they toss a couple pebbles to wake him up, then splat him with a large fruit to knock him out and to the ground.
Cera: "Nice flying. You ready?"
Petrie: *shakes head* "Me always ready!"
Cera: "Then let's go find Littlefoot!"
Ducky helps Petrie up.
Petrie: "What happen to your beak?"
Ducky gasps and rubs it.
Petrie: "How we find them anyway, they long gone!"
Cera: "One good thing about Longnecks, they leave big footmarks!"
Spike: "Mm-hm!"
The patented "sneak out at night" strat. It used to be a staple of the series, once per movie, but we haven't seen it since 5. They did sneak off in the four between those and 10, but they did so during the day.
The next day, Littlefoot's group has grown to a massive herd of Longnecks. He asks Grandma if her Sleep Stories were scary, and she says it was a lot she couldn't explain, some of it beautiful.
That night, she's apparently been explaining her Sleep Stories all day, since she ends with her waking up and knowing she whatever was going to happen, she was supposed to be there. Littlefoot agrees that was the feeling he got, too. Also, we get the first instance of CGI dinosaurs in the franchise.
Just for a crowd shot, but still. That Longneck in the dead center of the shot (at the far edge of the land bridge) is Grandma, and that tiny shadow next to her is Littlefoot.
The next day, the Longneck herd walks through a waterfall and Littlefoot asks Grandma if all Longnecks got that feeling, and if all of them will be wherever they're going (I doubt that, since this movie showed a few Longnecks in the Great Valley besides Littlefoot's family, and none of them left with them). Grandma thinks it's possible, but they'll have to wait and see. And what they see will be wonderful. The shot transitions to sundown, and we see different herds starting to converge.
The rest of The Gang enter the swamp, where the footprints disappear into the water. They start hopping across on rocks. The Sarcosuchus sees them and approaches, stealthily. Cera slips a foot in, and the swamp water is gross and slimy (though Littlefoot's grandparents walked through it without issue). Cera comes across two rocks, one of which is the Sarcosuchus's head. The Sarcosuchus "rock" is closer, but it looks slippery.
Ducky: "That one is fartherer away, so you might not make it. You would step in the icky goo again, and that is bad."
Petrie: "But, if she slip on close one, she maybe fall in all the way! And that be worser! Me think she can get to fartherer one, she good jumper!"
Ducky: "I am not saying she is not. But, what about if that rock is as icky and slimy as this one?"
The Sarcosuchus hisses, Petrie gasps, and Cera grunts in annoyance.
Petrie: "Me no think of that!"
Ducky: "You have to think of everything when you are in an icky, gooey place like this!"
Spike sits down and sighs, then rolls his eyes.
Petrie: "Ooh, that very good point! But, which rock next?"
The Sarcosuchus rolls its eyes.
Ducky: "Hey! What if she lands on the first rock with her back feet?"
Petrie: "Me think you got something there!"
The Sarcosuchus's eye is twitching.
Ducky: "Sure, and then she can-"
The Sarcosuchus rears up out of the water and attacks!
Okay, this whole bit was amazing. This movie's making me realize that Ducky and Petrie are an underused comedic duo. The Sarcosuchus being annoyed by them is a fantastic punchline. This is legitimately one of the funniest scenes I've seen in this franchise.
The kids jump backward as the Sarcosuchus bites down on the rock they were just on, creating a wave that pushes them back onto a log! It approaches! Ducky, Petrie, and Spike run away, while Cera runs sideways into a rotten tree. Spike bounds across the rocks, two feet at a time, and Petrie notes that Ducky was right before he flies into a slimy cobweb. The Sarcosuchus approaches Cera, whose horn is stuck in the tree. Petrie gets his wings all tangled and he falls, bonking the Sarcosuchus on the head and bouncing down its back. The Sarcosuchus turns around to face Petrie and he tries to fly away, skimming over the top of the water, but it catches up and catches Petrie in its mouth!
Cera pulls her horn free of the rotten tree, and the tree splits all the way up its trunk and disintegrates, making an EVEN BIGGER tree that was leaning on it fall down and slam on top of the Sarcosuchus, crushing it and launching Petrie out of its mouth!
The Sarcosuchus thrashes its tail while Cera pulls an "I meant to do that", and the kids run away before it escapes. The Sarcosuchus surfaces! Just its head, the rest of it is still pinned. It gives an honest-to-god Looney Tunes angry glance into the camera before rolling its eyes and returning to floating on the surface.
See, movie 8, THIS is how you do an ineffectual sympathetic villain! The Albertosaurus in that movie got beaten by a snowball and toboggan, but both scenes were played completely for drama and the Albertosaurus got no further characterization. While this Sarcosuchus is CLEARLY being played for laughs, getting stomped on, gasping for breath, getting annoyed and impatient, then getting pinned down like this. This is all really funny, and humanizing!
The Gang trudge out of the swamp, exhausted. Cera boasts that thing learned never to mess with a Threehorn, but the rest just want to find someplace to sleep. Petrie runs into a boulder and decides this is a good place. They all curl up and snooze next to the long suspiciously-dinosaur-shaped boulder.
The Longneck herd is walking through a huge forest of gargantuan trees. Littlefoot wakes up from napping on Grandpa's back, and he's amazed to see all the Longnecks. They stop and Sue lifts Littlefoot way high up, Grandpa tells Littlefoot to keep climbing until he reaches a gap in the tree stars, then tell everyone what he sees. Littlefoot reaches the top and sees... their destination.
Back with The Gang, Cera wakes Ducky and Petrie, insisting they need to get up early if they want to catch up with Littlefoot. Petrie wakes up Spike, then they hear snoring. That's not Spike. And boulders can't snore. But Sharpteeth can!
Who could have foreseen the suspiciously-dinosaur-shaped boulder would be a dinosaur?! Specifically, a Daspletosaurus.
It wakes up, the kids scream, and it chases them. The kids hide in a small cave to escape it.
Ducky: "That is the last time I trust Petrie to pick out a boulder to sleep near!"
Petrie: "Hey, it was dark, okay?!"
The kids hear a thudding, then an old Apatosaurus pokes his head in to tell them the Sharptooth is gone. He says that Sharpteeth are big, but dumb (more racism), they fooled him. He asks if they'll be fine on their own, and Cera insists they will, and he leaves. Ducky's not so sure.
The Longneck herd climbs a mountain and once they crest it, Littlefoot sees the the place they were all going:
A huge crater, filled with green food, water, and Longnecks migrating here from all over. Kinda reminds me of the Great Valley, though I'm pretty sure these walls are from an ancient meteor strike, while the Great Wall is a mountain range. The Longnecks enter, and chat amongst each other about how odd it is they've all come here. Sue walks though, noticing that everyone's shorter than her, until she bumps into a Longneck even bigger than she is!
Sue: "Excuse me... my goodness..."
???: "No problem. No problem at all, little lady."
Sue: "'Little lady', hehehehe!"
Cute. Wikipedia says this guy is an Ultrasaurus, but the story behind that dinosaur is weird and complicated and there is no real "Ultrasaurus", so I think this guy is actually a Sauroposeidon. Those weren't as long as Supersaurus, but they were taller.
Littlefoot's grandparents sigh and sit down, resting their weary feet as Littlefoot runs around, excited. He looks around and realizes this place looks like a big hole. He has a sudden and jarring flashback to his dream, where he saw the Great Circle falling, and concludes this is where it fell. But by the time he comes to that revelation, his grandparents are already asleep.
Littlefoot walks around, but then another Longneck boy trips him with his tail! Littlefoot calls him out but he denies it, and they get into an argument. The kid's dad (?, he looks like a different species) calls out to him and walks over.
???: "Shorty! Shorty, what's going on?"
Shorty: "... ow! He stepped on my tail, on purpose!"
???: "Who did?"
Shorty (at Littlefoot): "Him!"
???: "Him? You mean the one you tripped?"
Shorty: "Yeah, he- I mean, no! I didn't trip him!"
???: "Shorty, come on, it's me. Now give me the truth."
Shorty: "Oh okay, I tripped him."
???: "So what do you say now?"
Shorty: "Sorry."
Littlefoot: "It's okay."
Shorty stomps off. The man says that Shorty's a good kid at heart, he just likes to start trouble (doesn't sound like a good kid). He introduces himself as Bron, and Littlefoot introduces himself. In a wacky coincidence, Bron was also called Littlefoot when he was a kid. (wait, is that why none of the adults in the Great Valley have real names? kids change names when they become adults?) Bron is voiced by Kiefer Sutherland.
Grandpa yells Littlefoot's name and Littlefoot calls him over.
Grandpa: "Your grandma and I wondered where you had gotten to, heh, we uh- ... Bron?!"
Bron: "Papa Longneck!"
Grandpa: "Eh, Littlefoot, uh, this... is your father."
Littlefoot gasps, looks at Bron, and before Bron can say anything, Littlefoot just runs away. Grandpa and Bron call out to him, but he keeps running. He runs past the other Longnecks, bumping into some of them and not even stopping to apologize, and he runs up the wall. He runs up to the rim of the crater, and then he keeps running.
Yup, here is where Littlefoot's father is introduced! I mentioned we'd see him in my review of movie 1, but it took a while. This is why I thought they were holding off on mentioning Littlefoot's mom, and why I was so shocked she was just casually mentioned in 9. And yeah, Littlefoot's first instinct to meeting a father he's never known is to run away and keep running.
Back with the rest of The Gang, they're trying to figure out a way to cross a rushing river. It's too fast for Ducky to swim, and there are a couple rocks, but they're way too far apart to hop across on. The old Apatosaurus from before walks up and asks if they need help. Cera accuses him of following them, but their paths just keep crossing.
Cera insists they don't need help. Cera's plan is for them to get a running start and jump the river in one go. The others hate the plan, and insist that she go first.
Cera backs up. She then backs some some more.
Petrie: "You go any farther, you be back in Great Valley!"
Cera gulps and runs forward, taking a flying leap! Straight into the rushing rapids! Before she hits the water, the elderly Longneck catches her tail in his mouth and brings her back to land. He has an idea of his own, and Cera's willing to listen now. He just stretches his neck across the whole river and deposits the kids on the other side. Then he does two huge, mighty jumps, one to land on a rock in the middle of the river, and one to land on the other side.
The Gang wonder if he wanted to cross this river anyway, and he says it feels right, since he's been having these Sleep Stories. Cera concludes they are going the same direction.
Back at the crater, Littlefoot is sitting on the ledge, facing away and looking down. Bron walks up to him and says they have to talk.
Littlefoot (crying): "Where were you? All this time! Where were you?!"
Bron: "Oh Littlefoot."
And here is where we begin a flashback.
Bron: "Your mother and I knew we were going to have a hatchling. You see, we wanted to raise you in a safe place. So before you were even an egg, I went off to find a new home, for all of us. When I got back, the Earthshakes had changed everything. It took me so long to find where the nest had been, and nothing was left but a crack in the earth, as deep as a mountain is high. As I searched for your mother and the young one I knew had been born, the Great Circle rose and fell many times, but I couldn't find you anywhere."
Flashback end.
So, Bron left to go house-hunting for several years, then when he came back his old home was destroyed by a natural disaster. Also, not sure why Littlefoot's mom is blue here, she was brownish-pink in the original movie.
Bron: "I finally met someone who told me about- about your mom and the Sharptooth."
Littlefoot looks up at him.
Bron: "But he had no word about you, so I kept searching."
Maybe he's talking about Rooter?
Flashback resume.
Bron: "And then one day, I met a group of young Longnecks, wandering in the wilderness with no grown-ups to protect them. At first, I hoped one of them was you."
Bron: "But I soon realized that wasn't the case. But they came to depend on me. So I stayed with them, took care of them. And then some others joined up with us. Then some more. Then some more. In time, we were a herd."
Littlefoot is stunned to hear his dad is the leader of a whole herd of Longnecks. Bron complements how well Littlefoot has grown, and they tell each other that Littlefoot's mom would be proud of them. Grandma and Grandpa see them getting along from a distance, and that transitions into song 2 of the movie, me and my dad.
It's okay. A little too overly-saccharine, but there's a purpose to it.
It sucks where the Youtube video cuts off. Because the whole song is one long build-up to a punchline that isn't included in the video. The very next shot after the song finishes is this:
Yeah, kinda forgot about someone, did you?
With that punchline the song becomes a lot better in an ironic sense, but without it the song is just kinda mediocre. I like the cloud imagery, they look a lot nicer than the stupid rocks in On Your Own. But Bron not getting any verses is lame, you only hear him make a couple noises. Kiefer Sutherland can sing, he could have done some work here.
Anyway, like I said, after the song we see Shorty sulking next to a tree. Littlefoot notices him and asks his dad if Shorty was one of the kids they found. Bron explains that the other kids were adopted by others in the herd, but not Shorty. While he explains this, Shorty roars at a baby Longneck to scare him away from some clovers. Littlefoot feels conflicted.
Later, Shorty is tail-whipping rocks into a pond, and Littlefoot calls out to him. He whips a rock at Littlefoot and Littlefoot just barely dodges before complementing Shorty's hit.
Littlefoot: "You know, any time you wanna be with my dad and me-"
Shorty: "Listen pal, I can be with Bron any time I want to! You got that?! I know him better than you do."
Littlefoot: "Well, I-"
Shorty: "Yeah! And he likes me better!"
Littlefoot: "Oh yeah, well, he's my dad!"
Shorty tail-whips another rock, this time it hits Littlefoot straight in the lip.
Littlefoot: "Ow! That hurt!"
Shorty: "Wanna do something about it?!"
Littlefoot: *sigh* "No thanks." *he turns to leave*
Shorty: "That's what I thought! Coward! Baby! Huh?"
Littlefoot walks back to Bron and Bron just looks at Shorty sadly. Shorty sulks.
Shorty's a former street kid, he's used to solving his problems with violence, and he's not comfortable solving problems any other way. He always wants to start fights because it's the only way he can express his feelings.
With The Gang, they're walking through an area with lava rocks and streams. The elderly Longneck explains his Sleep Story, and then connects it to a story his grandfather told him. The story goes that the Night Circle got jealous of the Great Circle because people stayed awake for the Great Circle but slept while the Night Circle was out. The Night Circle was so jealous that it grabbed the Great Circle and threw it down to the world below. But there was a convenient herd of Longnecks below, and they stretched their necks up, caught the Great Circle, and threw it back up into the sky. And that's why Longnecks have long necks.
Cera (incredulous): "Longnecks saved the world, huh?"
Elderly Longneck: "Well, that's the story. Whether or not you believe it is up to you."
The lava rock underneath the Longneck's leg gives way, and he burns his leg on the molten lava underneath! Ducky yells his name, which is Pat. He tells the kids to run, but they stay and help push him to his feet. Pat hobbles his way on three legs out of the lava zone, before collapsing.
Yeesh, that's a bad burn. I'm impressed they even animated something that gnarly.
Pat is grateful, but tells the kids to go on ahead, this burn will slow him down significantly. They don't want to leave him behind. He tells them to go, they don't want to miss... whatever's about to happen. They whisper amongst themselves and tell Pat they decided not to leave him, making him speechless.
At the Longneck crater, Littlefoot and Bron are discussing what's going to happen, and Bron says it'll be wonderful, reminding Littlefoot of what Grandma said. Bron sees that Littlefoot loves his grandparents, just like how he loves his herd, and then asks if Littlefoot has thought about what happens next. Now that they've found each other, they don't want to be separated. They don't need to decide now, but it's just something to think about.
Littlefoot: "Uh hey, how come we haven't seen any Sharpteeth?"
Bron: "Sharpteeth are cowards; look how many of us there are. A Sharptooth would never attack a group this size. Remember, they only hunt in 2s and 3s. Ha-hah! Your friend Sue could handle that many herself!"
Littlefoot agrees, then sees his grandparents next to Sue and gets sad.
I dunno, based on franchise history, Sharpteeth mostly hunt alone, I've never seen a group of 3 of them, and only rarely a group of 2. We've seen a group of 4, but those were raptor-type, much smaller than the big ones.
That night, Littlefoot wants to sleep with Grandpa. He missed Littlefoot, too, but insists that it's okay if Littlefoot wants to be with his father right now. They just want him to be happy. They go to sleep, anyway. Later, Littlefoot wakes up and walks over to Bron, then sees Shorty leaving the crater. Littlefoot chases after him, and he tells Shorty it's dangerous out here, still late. He doesn't care, Bron is ignoring him now, like everyone else does. Littlefoot insists he'll always be special to Bron, since he's known him so much longer, and Littlefoot just met the guy. Littlefoot was wondering if he and Shorty could be like brothers. That cheers up Shorty.
They walk back, but as the sun rises, they can sense something approaching. Petrie lands on Shorty's head! Shorty screams and hides, while Littlefoot is happy to see Petrie. Shorty comes out and Petrie says that the others are on their way! They hear thudding footsteps, but instead of just the others, it's a Sharptooth chasing them!
Another Daspletosaurus. The kids run from it until Pat jumps in to headbutt it in the side, launching it into a tree, which breaks and falls on it! It manages to push the tree off right before Pat slams it in the chest with a tail whip! Unfortunately, that puts pressure on his burnt leg, and Pat falls. The Sharptooth approaches Pat, but Shorty tail-whips a rock into some other rocks, which roll under the Sharptooth's foot, causing it to slip and fall! Cera takes his cue and headbutts a huge pile of rocks to launch them! Littlefoot kicks a rock, and Shorty tail-whips a bunch of rocks, creating a rockslide that batters the Sharptooth! Petrie throws a rock and Spike pushes a boulder as Littlefoot and Cera run up to Pat and try to push him upright.
Bron wakes up to all the screaming and looks around. Pat is just about standing when the Sharptooth headbutts him, knocking him down again! Before the Sharptooth can bite him, a huge boulder flies in front of it, and Bron calls it out as a coward! Littlefoot yells "dad" (which surprises Cera) and Bron and the Sharptooth charge at each other. Bron does a sliding tail-sweep to knock the Sharptooth's legs out from under it. They get up and the Sharptooth bites Bron's leg and flips him over, but then Pat tail-whips the Sharptooth in the face to make it let go. Bron kicks it, launching it down the crater's edge.
Pat urges the kids to go up the hill, but then suddenly two more Sharpteeth arrive, one from each side! And the one they knocked down wakes up! By this point, all the adults are curious as to what all the noise is, including Grandpa.
Grandpa runs down to help! Littlefoot runs down to help Bron, who's trapped between two of them, but the higher one turns toward him! Just then, Grandpa slides down with a tackle, knocking it back! Grandma arrives and she goes down to help, too! Littlefoot isn't sure who to help, Bron or Grandpa, but Bron insists he can handle it. The Sharptooth backs Grandpa up against a ledge, but then Grandma comes in with a sliding tackle from behind, and Grandpa uses his tail and that momentum to trip the second Sharptooth off the ledge! Grandpa comments that even in their old age, they make a good team.
The third Sharptooth approaches Cera and Pat, and the other kids run to help. Pat tail-whips it in the face multiple times, but it shrugs them off, roars and headbutts him over! Cera rears back and does a full-force charge at the Sharptooth's foot, hitting it and actually making it step back! When it does, Shorty runs underneath its foot and presses up to make it trip and fall backward toward Bron and the first Sharptooth! Bron slips a bite and then dodges the falling Sharptooth, which hits the first one and knocks both of them off a ledge, falling down to the ground!
Shorty (to Cera): "Wow! That was a great move!"
Cera: "You're not so bad yourself, for a Longneck!"
Bron tells Littlefoot to go back up, it's time. All the Longnecks are gathering in a line along the ledge. But both of the Sharpteeth knocked down are standing up! The clouds are spiraling around the Great Circle, and the scenery is downright apocalyptic!
Or, uh. Something else. You might have guessed already what's going to happen here. There's been more than enough clues and hints.
The three Sharpteeth follow Brom up the hill, but then they stop when a shadow passes over them. Even the Sharpteeth look up at the sky. Brom joins the rest of the Longnecks and tells Littlefoot to hurry up.
Sue lifts Littlefoot and Shorty up on her head and Littlefoot comments this is just like his Sleep Story, the Great Circle's going to fall and they need to catch it! All of the Longnecks stretch their necks up and stand on their toes, their eyes shut tight. The Night Circle covers up the Great Circle and there's a bright corona with falling meteors.
Yup, this was all building up to a solar eclipse. A damn impressive one, I'll give them that.
The Sharpteeth just straight-up leave, they don't want any part of whatever the hell is going on here. Littlefoot opens his eyes as they see the Great Circle move past the Night Circle. They're all stunned and in awe of what they just saw and "accomplished".
Cera: "I don't believe it. Longnecks saved the world! This is gonna kill my dad."
The Longnecks start leaving. Pat says goodbye to the kids. Ducky and Petrie have trouble spitting it out, but they get around to inviting Pat to live in the Great Valley. He graciously accepts.
Grandma notices Sue leaving with the taller Longneck she met, and Sue apologizes that she won't be joining their group, but then takes back the apology while giggling. Grandma wishes her a lovely journey home. Grandma's expressions and tone in this scene are very suggestive, saying "she's gonna get fucked, good for her".
After, Grandma and Grandpa nuzzle heads, seeing that put them in a romantic mood.
Just, uh, ignore the fact that Sue is a diplodocid and the other Longneck is clearly a brachiosaurid, making them as different from each other as humans are from chimpanzees. Ignore that for the sake of the dicking Sue's been dreaming of getting from a taller man!
Over with the kids, Cera headbutts a large rock, to no effect. She shakes it off.
Shorty: "Doesn't it hurt? What's the trick?"
Cera: "The trick is not minding!"
A piece of the rock breaks off of the top and falls on Shorty's head.
Shorty: "Uh! ... waaaoooowww."
Cera is proud at having taught Shorty this, but then she looks over and sees Littlefoot looking sad. She excuses herself and walks over to him. The rest of The Gang joins him, and ask him what's wrong? He says that it's his dad. Bron's great, but he doesn't want to give him up. But he also doesn't want to leave Grandma and Grandpa and them. This leads into song 3 of the movie: Bestest Friends.
Usually they don't put the last song after the climax, I was thinking maybe they forgot!
... I know this song. Not just because I've seen this movie before, I feel like I remember this song more than that. Specifically Cera's lines sound really familiar, like I've heard this song in other contexts. It also kinda sounds like another song trying to be a hit single, maybe it succeeded? Or maybe I just rewatched this scene a bunch.
This song is fantastic. The lyrics are great, the singing is REALLY solid here, and the animation is great. It's not as crazy as some of the other songs, but the subtle character animation is REALLY good here. And that circular panning shot is INSANE. The ground is obviously CGI, but the characters are 2D, and it's hard to do a circular panning shot in 2D, especially one with singing animation synch, and all the drawings they had to do for every frame of every different angle. That's just absolutely nuts.
And then having the song end with a lick from Spike is the cherry on top. Spike typically is neglected in songs, since he's mute, but when he does get something to do, it typically elevates the song a step for remembering to include him.
My only complaint is that it steps on the toes of Family from 8. Both in terms of message and context. Littlefoot thinking about leaving with Bron is very similar to Spike leaving with the Spiketails. And that wasn't even the first time we've had this dilemma, it also happened with Littlefoot and Ali's herd in 4. Though this instance is a bit more plausible than the others that he'd go through with it, since it's his actual dad. In-universe, at least. I wish Ducky had referenced movie 8 in the song, that we've been through something like this already with Spike, so we know what to expect emotionally.
Also, I keep having this thought but forgetting to mention it, and the circular panning shot reminded me again: Littlefoot is the only member of The Gang without a beak. All of the others have beaks, Littlefoot is the only one with a snout.
After the song, Littlefoot goes to talk to his father. Grandpa and Grandma nuzzle him goodbye, and Grandma sheds a few tears. Bron is excited to introduce Littlefoot to the rest of the herd, he's told them he has a son for so long. But Littlefoot cuts him off and asks if he can say his decision. Bron nods and Shorty watches.
Littlefoot: "I've been thinking about this a lot. I really wanna go live with you!"
Bron: "Well, that's great, 'cause I-"
Littlefoot: "But I can't."
Bron: "Huh? Littlefoot..."
Littlefoot: "Grandma and Grandpa really need me, and I need them. And my friends! You know, they came all this way, just to find me. And, I'm just not ready to leave them, yet."
Bron: "But Littlefoot I- I can't just leave my herd. They depend on me. I'm their leader."
Littlefoot: "I know. For some of them, you're even more than that." *looking at Shorty*
Bron: "Yes. I know."
While this conversation is going, they're playing an instrumental version of Bestest Friends in the background. Which does a lot to elevate the scene.
Littlefoot (choking up): *sniff* "I'm really happy I finally found you! And when I'm older, we can have some more adventures together. Can't we?"
Bron: "Count on it. Hey, who knows? One of these days, I might drag my whole herd over to the Great Valley for a visit. I love you, son."
Littlefoot (nuzzling): "Me too."
Littlefoot walks back to his grandparents and announces that he's ready to go home, and they're delighted. Bron looks on sadly, but approving. He then turns around and lifts Shorty up onto his head.
It's a shame we only have Alec around to voice Littlefoot for one movie, he did a fantastic job, overall. Especially with the sad scenes.
Narrator: "And so, the great herd of Longnecks dispersed. Littlefoot had found his father, and had saved the world."
Pat: "Come on, kids!"
Narrator: "For Littlefoot and his father, there would be more adventures to come, but for now, he headed for home, the Great Valley."
Ducky: "I just have one question: do we have to go back through the swamp?"
Cute. Also, the narrator keeps promising follow-ups, just how many sequels were they expecting?! I know Bron comes back in the tv show, but still.
The credits song is a cover of Bestest Friend by Olivia Newton-John.
Hah! I called this one, too! This wasn't the version I remember hearing, by the way. I guess it was the movie version.
I have mixed feelings on this movie. Not for the same reasons as with 8 and 9, my feelings on 10 are almost entirely positive. It's just that... for personal reasons, I can't really connect with the Bron plotline.
I grew up with a single mother because she just wanted a kid and one of her male friends was willing to help. She never wanted to get married, she always wanted to be a single mom. I never thought anything was missing in my life by not having a father, and I've never had any interest in learning anything about him.
So anytime a movie has a plot point that seems to imply there's something wrong with being a single parent, or being the child of a single parent, it makes me uncomfortable. This was the thing I hated most about Despicable Me 2, the implication that Gru can't raise three girls without having a woman to help out. And my issue with this movie is that Littlefoot acts like having a dad fixed something in him. That's not to say Bron is a bad character. He's good. It's just the subtext of his plotline that bugs me, for entirely personal reasons.
Aside from that personal bugbear of mine, this movie is fantastic. A worthy entry for the 15th anniversary flick. There's only one mediocre song, and it's a lead-in to a killer punchline. The other 2 songs are both amazing.
I was a little disappointed we didn't see Old One and Ali from 4, or Doc from 6 in this movie. They should have been here. Then again, according to Bron, much of his herd were back home, so it wasn't literally every Longneck in the world that was here.
You could accuse this movie of having the same pacing issues as some previous ones, since Bron isn't introduced until the halfway point, but I wouldn't. The story before Bron is still pretty interesting and compelling, and besides, it's called "The Great Longneck Migration", not "The Great Longneck Gathering". It should have a lot of time and focus dedicated to the migration itself.
This movie had the most epic climax in the franchise so far, between the huge triple Sharptooth battle and the solar eclipse. The only movies that come close are 1 and 3, but even then, I'd say this outdid them.
Speaking of those Sharpteeth, they were characterized pretty well. The Sarcosuchus was sympathetic for all the slapstick it suffered, and the Daspletosaurus trio earned some personality points for noping out of there when the solar eclipse happened. Not as strong villains as if they could talk, but better than most nameless Sharpteeth we've seen.
Pros: Petrie and Ducky were REALLY funny. Two fantastic songs. The four Sharpteeth villains were solid. The biggest climax so far. Great animation. Great guest-characters with Sue, Brom, and Shorty. The solar eclipse looked amazing. The storyline was very "mythical" in feel.
Cons: My personal hang-up with single parents being portrayed as invalid makes me not connect with Bron's subplot. Bron should have sung in Me and My Dad. Not enough Longneck cameos.
Score: I'm gonna give this a 9/10, with an acknowledgement that I'm ranking it lower due to personal bias. If there was no bias, it might get a 10/10. Maybe.
The Land Before Time: 8/10 (hypothetical uncut version: 9/10)
Last Time: The Gang had a fun time snowball fighting and there was no drama whatsoever, especially none related to academic fraud or interracial adoption! 🙃
This Time: Never seen this one, have not heard good things.
The Universal Logo is still not Pangaea:
The movie begins deep underwater, at the hydrothermal vents. We see a bunch of ancient marine animals as the narrator introduces them.
Narrator: "The ancient seas, home to so many wondrous creatures. Creatures both small, and very, very large. Millions and millions of years ago, these creatures swam in the warm oceans that covered most of our planet."
Hey, Elsie got a cameo!
The narrator goes on to say that the oceans were beautiful and dangerous, but the surface was also dangerous because of predators and the constantly changing weather. A huge storm is raging on the surface, and we see an even weirder cameo:
One of the Rainbow Faces, outrunning a mudslide! Is this one of the two we've seen before, or another one? Or is it a non-alien Gallimimus? Hard to know for sure.
Over in the Great Valley, it's storming just as hard. There's puddles everywhere, and Littlefoot's grandma and Grandpa are worried it won't stop. That's when it stops. And makes a beautiful rainbow!
The artstyle of this movie is a little different, more use of digital shaders. I like it, it looks different, but good.
Littlefoot runs off to play with his friends, and Grandma warns him to be careful of any changes made by all the skywater. He comes across Cera and her dad, who are rolling a really obvious CGI tree. Right when I was complementing the artstyle, too! Cera can't play because this tree fell on their nest.
Littlefoot: "I could help!"
Cera's dad (aggravated): "Rrrgh, thanks for the offer, Littlefoot, but my daughter and I are fully capable of doing the job ourselves! Hurh!"
He gets all up in Littlefoot's face while saying that.
Littlefoot leaves and goes to Ducky and Spike. They're moving nest because the skywater made their current nest too muddy, so they can't hang out, either. They do have a lot of fun splashing in the mud, and in a good bit of continuity from the last movie, Spike does a couple things that annoy Ducky here (tossing her off his back, splashing her with mud), but she brushes it off, not worth getting mad at him over it.
Littlefoot goes to see Petrie, his last resort, but predictably, Petrie can't hang out either. He got a cold from wet feet and is sneezing up a storm. Littlefoot leaves and it's a little early for this, but he goes into song 1 of the movie: Chanson D'Ennui (Song of Boredom)
I like the inexplicable French in the title. I also... really like this song? More than I feel like I should. I've docked points from other songs in the past for excluding one character or another, but this one actually incorporates all of them (except Spike, obviously, but he's there).
It's kinda basic, but done in a really solid way? Like, the rhyme scheme is actually kinda fun and bouncy, going from rhyme to rhyme without missing a beat. And the transitions are pretty creative, too, between the splash wipe, the split-screen, the jump cut zooms on Petrie, and the face bubbles.
And while Littlefoot's singing feels a little off, I really like the Cera and Ducky duet in the middle (reminiscent of The Mad Song) and especially Petrie's ill singing. Petrie's voice is already weird and hard to sing with, but doing it while mimicking a cold and still sounding pretty good is a genuinely impressive feat of voice-acting.
After the song, Littlefoot goes back to his grandparents (who are enjoying the rain-covered tree stars) and whines about being bored. None of his friends want to hang out (well, all of them want to, but none of them can, there's a difference).
Littlefoot: "I wish my mom had given me a brother, then I'd always have someone to have fun with!"
LITTLEFOOT'S MOM HASN'T EVEN BEEN MENTIONED SINCE THE FIRST MOVIE! The closest we got was a heavy allusion to her in 5 with Always There. But THIS is how it happens?! This is how they directly mention Littlefoot's mom for the first time in 8 films?! Littlefoot whining that he doesn't have a sibling?! WOW! That's a Choice! Just casually mention her for the first time in 14 years (1 was in 1988, 9 was in 2002)!
I'm just so taken aback by that! Frankly, I wasn't expecting her to be mentioned until the next movie, since... uh, Reasons. This took me COMPLETELY by surprise!
While saying this, Littlefoot lies on his back and looks up at a Longneck-shaped cloud.
Which has to be a DIRECT callback to when Littlefoot's mom appeared in the clouds at the end of the first movie! I was wondering if Littlefoot's shadow in Song of Boredom was a intentional reference to movie 1 or not, and I'm POSITIVE it is now!
Grandma: "Now, little one, your mother would have loved to have given you a brother, Littlefoot!"
Grandpa: "Yes, but because you were her only child, you were very, very special to her!"
Littlefoot: "What's so special about being all alone?"
Grandpa: "Ah, but that's just it, Littlefoot! None of us are ever really alone."
And then Grandpa references his daughter's dying words, that she'll always be with Littlefoot. And the reference to Littlefoot being an unplanned only child (unplanned as in he should have had siblings, but their eggs were all broken). Damn. Good continuity. Like, so good that I'm actually stunned.
Grandpa tells Littlefoot to look around at the Great Valley, at the wide variety of dinosaurs living in it. There's life everywhere, and there might even be undiscovered life out there somewhere, so he's never really alone. Littlefoot doesn't get it and walks off. He sees two frogs hopping over each other, and starts sulking about not having anyone to play with. He's so lonely, he starts talking to his reflection in the water!
Littlefoot: "Oh hey! Hello, Littlefoot, what would you like to do today?"
Reflection Littlefoot (in a deeper voice): "I dunno, Littlefoot, what do you wanna do?"
Littlefoot: "Hey, no fair, I asked you first!"
Reflection Littlefoot: "Okay, let's go have some fun!"
The frogs return, jumping into the water and destroying Reflection Littlefoot. Littlefoot runs off, continuing to talk to himself in various puddles (Reflection Littlefoot is more mature and cautious), until he comes across a huge area of flooding.
He brings the adults here. They worry about how flooded this part of the Great Valley is, and that the water here is draining from those falls coming from the Mysterious Beyond. Cera's dad, ever the xenophobe, points out that there could be terrible creatures from the Mysterious Beyond in this water, meaning it's dangerous and the kids should stay away. Everyone leaves when it looks like it's about to start raining again. As the rain falls, we see a mysterious shadow swimming through the flooded plains.
Early the next morning, Littlefoot is awakened by a dolphin-like chattering and cooing. He tries to sneak off, but Grandpa wakes and drowsily tells him to be careful before going back to sleep. Littlefoot walks over to the flooded area, hearing more of the dolphin-like noises. He sees a figure swimming and jumping around and calls out to it. It swims right up to him, splashing him with water.
It's an ichthyosaur, specifically an Ophthalmosaurus, according to Wikipedia. Littlefoot introduces himself, but the ichthyosaur can't pronounce the "L", so he pronounces it "Yittlefoot". He introduces himself as Mo.
Mo: "He-hah! Mo no got yand foot like Yittlefoot. Mo got werrrrraterfooooot! He-hah! See?" *he flips upside-down, showing off his tail flipper*
I dunno how I feel about Mo. I'm not too bothered by his weird dolphin-speech, since it's not that much weirder than Petrie's, and it's clearly meant to represent that he's not used to speaking in the air. But that design is a bit much. Bright purple and yellow with bright orange accents is excessively cartoony and contrasts hard against the rest of the characters being muted and monochromatic.
Littlefoot and Mo start playing in the shallows.
The rest of The Gang are all together, looking for Littlefoot (I guess Petrie got over his cold?). Petrie suggests that maybe Littlefoot is avoiding them because they didn't play with him yesterday, and Cera angrily retorts that it's not their fault. Petrie falls in a puddle, Ducky pulls him out, then Petrie sneezes and launches himself back into the puddle (okay, so he's still got the cold). They hear Littlefoot laughing, and they run over to see what fun he's having without them. They push through some grass and come upon the flooded area.
Ducky: "It is just like the grown-ups said! It is Big New Water!"
Cera: "C'mon, let's go find Littlefoot!"
Ducky: "But Cera, my momma said not to go near the New Water! She said 'do not go there, it could be dangerous'."
Cera: "Yeah, my dad said that, too, but like that's stopped us before! Besides, Littlefoot's laughing, so how bad can it be?"
Spike thinks she has a point, and that convinces Ducky to go.
Petrie: "Just because they go no mean me have to! Me think for myself!"
Cera: "Petrie?"
Petrie: "Coming!"
Again, I like the continuity. It's a little thing, but Cera pointing out they never listen to warnings of danger is great.
The Gang finds Littlefoot, covered in mud. Littlefoot says that he and Mo are now "Mud Brothers" (a pun on "blood brothers"). The Gang question who Mo is, and Littlefoot wants to introduce him, he lives in the New Water. Ducky points out that the grown-ups said they should be wary of the New Water, meaning Mo might be dangerous. Mo overhears this from underwater, which makes him sad and he leaves. Littlefoot tries to introduce him but since he doesn't show up, Cera accuses Littlefoot of making Mo up, which he denies.
Spike: "Ur-uh?"
Littlefoot: "Well, I didn't! I wouldn't talk to an imaginary friend!"
Petrie: "Why not? Me talk to imaginary friend all the time!"
Everyone turns to look at Petrie, alarmed.
To defend himself, Petrie jumps into song 2 of the movie: Imaginary Friend.
So I guess this ties into Reflection Littlefoot and the Longneck cloud?
Cool. Uh. Yeah, I don't like this song. Maybe it's just bias, I always thought imaginary friends were stupid as a concept, but also... the song is just bad. The rhyme scheme is mediocre, the animation is deranged, with the mugging to the camera, jerky movements, and big mouths. The singing itself is fine, but the tune is annoying.
And the designs of the imaginary friends are FUCKING TERRIFYING, WAY more than the intentionally creepy fishes they imagined in Big Water. But these aren't supposed to be scary, these are supposed to be cute and friendly, and they're NOT. This is some Heffalumps and Woozles/Pink Elephants kind of nightmare fuel (but again, both of those were SUPPOSED to be unsettling).
This is the most childish song in the franchise so far, by a lot. In the same movie that mentions Littlefoot's dead mom, we have this Sesame Street-ass song completely interrupting the story. Though even Sesame Street songs tend to be better than this!
Also, it's weird that Petrie's imaginary friend is a defanged version of Chomper. Like, I don't think I wanted to know that about you, my guy. Maybe you should have kept that to yourself.
That said, those 3 random turtles are fuckin' it up on the dance floor!
Wait, how does Petrie have the energy and voice to do a big song and dance number like this? I thought he had a cold!
The song doesn't even matter. Immediately after, Mo jumps out of the water and everyone sees him, proving he's real. So this whole thing was pointless. What a waste of a song slot, we only get like 3 of these per movie, y'know, and we've already gone through 2!
Littlefoot introduces his friends to Mo. Mo declares that Ducky is Special because she can swim and walk on land, and Ducky declares that Spike is also Special... because he eats a lot. Mo is entertained by Petrie flying. But Cera interrogates Mo, demanding to know where he came from. Mo came from the Big Water, and Petrie asks how he got here.
Mo explains that the skywater created huge waves, and Mo got sucked into a whirlpool that pulled him here. Mo insists he's all alone, nothing else is here with him. Yeah, that's not true. Mo swims down and sees a Liopleurodon, and it passes right by him to go after the kids (ooh, interesting, are Mo and the Liopleurodon actually working together, like a variation of Ichy and Dil?). Mo swims past the Liopleurodon and then surfaces to warn The Gang.
The Liopleurodon surfaces and bites at the kids, but it can't go too far out because Mo tied a sunken vine around its tail and to a tree, locking it in place. So, I guess they're not working together? Why did Mo lie, then? And why did it ignore Mo like 3 times? The Liopleurodon (I'll just call him Lio) goes back down and snaps the vine with one bite before swimming off.
The Gang start discussing the giant swimming sharptooth. Cera insists that the grown-ups were right, the New Water is dangerous and they should stay away. I'm glad they settled on "New Water", to differentiate it from the "Big Water". Littlefoot says they can't just leave Mo with that monster, they're Mud Brothers, and after a bit of thinking, he suggests they take Mo back to Big Water.
Cera: "WHAT?!"
Littlefoot: "Why not? We've been there before!"
Ducky: "But Littlefoot, Mo cannot walk with us to the Big Water, he is a swimmer and has no feet!"
Cera: "Besides, we only know how to get there when we turn right at the Smoking Mountains, and we are nowhere near them!"
Littlefoot: "Well, if you won't help me, I'm sure the grown-ups will!"
Wipe transition
Cera's dad: "You can't be serious! We're not going to the Mysterious Beyond to help some strange creature!"
Yeah, I don't know why he thought that would work. Again, though, good continuity. Littlefoot mentions they've been to Big Water before (in 5), and Cera mentions the Smoking Mountains, which were a landmark in 1. And Cera's dad being racist.
Littlefoot storms off while his grandpa scolds Cera's dad for being mean to him for asking, because there's no harm in asking. The Gang follow Littlefoot and by the time the grown-ups finish arguing and turn their attention back, the kids are already gone.
That was the shortest "adults are useless" group chat we've seen yet! And just to gripe for a bit, I know The Gang are the main characters so they lead the story, but the adults being useless nowadays doesn't really sit right with me. It is in-line with movie 1, but they were plenty useful in 2 and 3, even carrying a whole subplot of 3.
The Gang return to the New Water, and then some rumbling happens. In another callback to 5, Ducky mistakes it for her tummy rumbling until it happens again and they realize it's an earthshake! The kids run for it as the earthshake juts up huge rocks in their path and opens up a massive smoking fissure in the earth, splitting The Gang and the New Water off from the rest of the Great Valley!
Petrie tries to fly across to get the grown-ups for help, but a hot steam vent scares him off. Not a bad plan, Petrie's mom could've brought her Quetzalcoatlus friend from 7 and he could carry them across.
Man, it's a good thing none of those fissures connect to the New Water, huh? Or else Mo (and Lio) would have been flushed down and boiled! You know, the kids could have just done this on their own, the story didn't really need an inconvenient earthshake to justify the adventure.
At evening, the guardians have gathered on the other side of the fissure:
Cera's dad: "This way, their tracks lead right in the direction of the New Water! Which you know can mean only one thing: Littlefoot has led our children into trouble, once again!"
Littlefoot's grandpa: "Now, now, Mr. Threehorn, we don't know anything yet, for sure. If our kids did go back to the New Water, I'm sure they're trying to find their way home this very minute! 'Til then, we must find a way around this land break. We'll keep looking until we find them!"
This one was a little cheap, but I am living for these continuity nods. Cera's dad originally disliked Littlefoot just because he was a Longneck, but now that has morphed into a specific dislike of this one brat because he keeps leading the other kids into trouble!
The next day, Littlefoot meets up with Mo and is relieved to see he's okay after that earthshake. Mo comments the earthshake was good, it trapped Lio in this cave.
Littlefoot realizes this means the New Water is safe for them to help Mo get home, and Mo is very happy to hear that. Littlefoot goes to tell The Gang the plan, which is to find a roundabout way home to the Great Valley, and also take Mo to the Big Water on the way. Everyone but Cera is down for the plan, but her hesitation is out-voted.
Petrie goes to scout ahead for paths Mo can take back to the Big Water (for some reason, I thought they were going to carry Mo over land, but no, that would have been interesting). Petrie gets bored while flying and creates his imaginary friend to keep him company. He hums the chorus of the song Imaginary Friend while flying. They REALLY wanted this song to be an earworm, didn't they?
After a long time flying, he eventually finds the Big Water, then heads back to tell the others. Littlefoot praises him, and Petrie gives some credit to his imaginary friend, which Cera scoffs at (oh, now you don't like them again?). The kids set off, following the river. First climbing down a waterfall (Mo just jumps down), then crossing over the river on some rocks, then walking alongside the river in a path carved out in the side of a cliff.
Cera: "Mo this, and Mo that, hmph!" *Mo squirts water in her face* "HEY!"
Mo: "Fuuuuuuun!"
Cera: "Littlefoot, would you please tell your Mud Brother that this is no time to be having fun! GETTING HIM AND US HOME IS VERY SERIOUS!! Hmph!"
Littlefoot: "Um, Mo, maybe you should stop playing around for now, okay? I think you're kinda gettin' on Cera's nerves."
Mo: "Nerrrrrves?"
I'm with Cera on this one. She's overreacting a bit, but Mo is annoying. People who can't be serious can be real jerks. I know, because I was that kind of person as a teenager.
The gang stop to rest and drink some water from the river, but Mo blows up bubbles and they stick to Littlefoot's face like a beard. Mo blows more bubbles and sticks them to his own face and the two start laughing.
Cera glares at them and then stomps away.
You know, we've done this before. Littlefoot making a new friend, who Cera gets jealous of. Remember Ali in 4? We've done this whole subplot before. And I wasn't a huge fan of it there, either.
The Gang reach a huge boulder in the water, which Petrie thought looked a lot smaller from the sky. Ducky suggests that Mo could swim under the boulder, and she swims down to check it out with him. Mo swims into a crack and gets stuck, Ducky can't pull him out! She surfaces to tell the others, and they all immediately jump into the water to help, despite Ducky reminding them that they're not Swimmers. After a few seconds, they all surface, coughing and hacking, none of them having seen Mo.
Mo surfaces next to them and laughs. Littlefoot's relieved to see he's not stuck, and Mo clarifies he was never stuck, he was just having fun!
Yeah, that doesn't go over well. Mark up another time Ducky was mad. Cera demands that Littlefoot realize Mo never takes anything seriously and just wants to have fun all the time.
Littlefoot... deflects. He realizes that Mo has fun jumping all the time, so maybe Mo can jump over the boulder! Petrie's worried about what happens if he falls and hits the boulder, but Littlefoot suggests he can stand on the boulder to catch Mo if something goes bad.
Littlefoot walks over to the boulder and stands on it, and Mo swims up and does a huge leap! He doesn't quite make it, but he's able to land on Littlefoot and slide along his body like a ramp from tail to head to make it to the other side!
Back at the New Water, some of the rocks blocking in Lio fall down.
The Gang journey on silently through a montage. Through forests, beaches, and rocky plains, even at night. Well, The Gang walk silently. Mo dances and jumps alongside while laughing annoyingly. The next day, they're tired and bored. Ducky suggests they sing to pass the time, and that starts song 3 of the movie, Big Water. Wait, what?
Yup, in another callback to a previous film, the third song is a short reprise of Big Water from 5. It's okay. Not bad. It doesn't have the fun imagination sequences of the original, and the lyrics are mostly just retreading it, except for the last verse which is new. It feels unfair to judge it by the standards of a full song, but if I had to, it's below-average. As a short it's okay.
After that, Mo starts making a horrible squealing sound. A huge swarm of grasshoppers jump out and Mo starts making squeaking noises at them. They chitter back and forth for a bit until the grasshoppers leave. Apparently Mo and the grasshoppers speak the same squeaking language, and they said The Gang is close to the Big Water, and they also really like Mo's singing!
Later, The Gang is trudging on, and Ducky falls into a hole. Spike pulls her out and they realize the hole she fell in was a nest full of eggs. The mother, a diplodicus (same species as Doc), shows up and the kids are briefly terrified she'll hurt them, but once she confirms all her eggs are safe and sound, she's sympathetic toward The Gang, since they're just kids, themselves. They tell her they got separated from home, and they're just trying to get back.
They ask if she can give them a safe place to rest for the night, and she obliges.
That night, the gang are sleeping in her embrace, and Mo calls Littlefoot over to show him some sea stars underwater. Littlefoot remembers his grandfather's words about never being alone, and then he starts song 4 of the movie (but let's be real, this is song 3): No One Has to Be Alone.
This feels like an Oscar-bait song. Or, I guess Emmy-bait? Between the babies hatching, the camera panning, Petrie flying in front of the moon and then skidding across the water for no reason, the mother singing bits, and the kinda generically broad feel-good lyrics, it feels like a song meant to be impressive and award-baiting. I get the feeling they wanted this to be a hit breakout single, like The Prayer from Quest For Camelot.
That's not to say that it doesn't work. This is a great song. But it feels a little try-hard. Like it strains the suspension of disbelief a bit, that none of the gang or the mom were annoyed at Littlefoot waking them up, and they just immediately join in on the song despite having no context for Littlefoot's whole epiphany he just went through. And on top of that, her eggs happen to hatch right now, too?
Also, I think the song would be better if Mo got to contribute. Like if his dolphin-singing made up a music element in the mix.
After the song, Littlefoot says he'll never feel alone again!... That's a pretty big statement there. I'll hold you to it, kid. Back in the Great Valley, the parents are still looking for their kids.
Next morning, the kids thank the mom and leave, then she tends to her newborns. Back on the trail, it's super hot, so everyone but Mo is uncomfortable. Ducky suggests they stop to swim, and when she jumps in, the water is nice and cool, but tastes bad. Which means they're really close to the Big Water! They decide to celebrate by playing in the water together!
Cera: "Hey! Let's show Mo how much fun we are!"
Mo (surfaces): "...Uh-ohhh!"
Cera: "GET 'IM!!!"
They all jump at Mo, splashing him with water! They play and splash around until Cera steps on something pointy. She pokes her head down to look, and a crab grabs onto her horn! She runs around in a panic, and Petrie tries and fails to pull it off. Mo squeaks something to the crab, and it lets go and goes back in the water. They ask what he said, and those squeaks just translated to "let go". Mo offers to swim ahead and see which water path is right. Wait, why bother? Petrie already knows the wa- and he's gone.
From the path they came, though, Lio approaches (ooh, did Mo sense Lio's arrival and abandon them?!)! Clouds come in and it starts to rain.
Cera: "Oh great, more skywater. Well, nothing could possibly make my day any worse!"
Lio surfaces dramatically!
Cera: "Except for that!"
The kids barely managed to get out of the way when Lio slams down, creating a huge wave that washes them ashore.
Hang on. Hold on one minute. How did Lio make it past the boulder? You know, the one Mo had to jump over? In the scene immediately prior to when we cut back to see Lio's escape?
Whatever. Petrie flies up to the top of a cliff under a dead tree, while the rest of the kids try to climb the hill to escape, but the rain is making it muddy and they slide down. Lightning strikes Petrie! Just, straight-up, lightning directly hits Petrie, and he and the log next to him fall. Lio jumps out of the water and bites Petrie by the wing, but then is hit in the face by the falling log and lets go!
Unable to climb the hill, the kids run and take shelter inside the log, floating in the middle of the lake as the water level slowly rises. It's silent. They discuss maybe going out to check, but then Lio grabs the log with his teeth, lifting it into the air and slamming it down into the water's surface over and over again before throwing it away!
Lio charges at the log again as the kids try to paddle away, but not fast enough! Lio rises up, his jaws wide open to bite down, when suddenly Mo jumps out of the water and hits Lio on the back of his head!
Lio's head hitting the water creates a huge wave that pushes the log to shore. Lio flips his head back to launch Mo across the lake, and Mo actually skips a bit, stunning him! Lio swims after Mo, targeting him for the first time this movie! But not directly. Lio circles Mo and then surfaces in front of him while Mo yells "Goodbye, friends!". Mo blows a raspberry, shocking Lio, then Mo slaps Lio in the face with his tail multiple times before swimming off, Lio in hot pursuit. Littlefoot screams Mo's name and a big "NOOOOOOOOOO" dramatically.
Okay, I'm 100% positive at this point there's something going on between Mo and Lio. There has to be. Mo lied about being alone, was ignored by Lio, then Lio was conveniently trapped in a cave. Then Mo conveniently leaves just before Lio's return, and when Mo stops Lio from eating the gang, Lio doesn't attack Mo directly, he swims around him for a bit before surfacing. And when Mo blew that raspberry, Lio actually looked offended before Mo jumped up and slapped him in the face!
There's something going on between these two. There has to be.
Next morning, The Gang (minus Littlefoot) wake up under a rocky alcove. Littlefoot is moping over by the water.
Littlefoot: "Everything's been my fault. All I wanted was someone to have fun with! I never should have gone near the New Water. I never should have made you guys be friends with Mo..."
The others reassure Littlefoot that he didn't make them do anything, and Cera says that bad stuff just happens sometimes. She continues that they did all get a new brother out of it, even her!
Littlefoot: "But, Cera, I thought you didn't like Mo?"
Cera: "Well, I did like him, kinda..."
Spike: "Huuhh?!"
Cera (after thinking for a bit): "Okay, I didn't like him! But it was just because you thought he was so- so..."
Littlefoot: "So what, Cera?"
Cera: *sigh* "So fun! I mean, I'm fun, too!"
The others reassure Cera that she is fun.
Cera: "Huh. Then, what was I all jealous for?"
Littlefoot: "Beats me!"
You know, I wasn't a fan of this subplot when they did it with Ali, either. This retread just feels tired.
Ducky remarks she definitely shouldn't have been jealous of Mo's singing ability, and Petrie and Spike make fun of Mo by squealing into the air. Then they hear a more authentic squeal! They recognize Mo, and run toward the sound!
Mo jumps out of a log in the water, and they happily reunite. Mo explains how he escaped, by swimming in a circle to disorient Lio, then he hid in a hollow log, like he saw the gang do. Lio was furious, but then he sniffed the air and left to swim downstream. Littlefoot sniffs and realizes the Big Water is in that direction, meaning the sharptooth swimmer went home! The Gang crest a hill and see it!
They run up to the shore and Littlefoot says goodbye to Mo. Mo tells them to stay here! But they can't, Ducky explains that the water and green food here tastes yucky. Littlefoot says they'll always be brothers, and Mo splats a chunk of mud on his face and says "Muuud Brothers!" Mo then sees his waterkin arrive, a whole pod of Ophthalmosaurus. Mo happily reunites with them, nuzzling and frolicking!
Mo swims back and asks The Gang how they're getting home, and Littlefoot says they need to find the Smoking Mountains, they know the way home from there. Mo goes to ask his pod if they know where those are.
After talking a bit with them, Mo dives under and sends a burst of echolocation out, then receives a burst from somewhere in the distance. Mo swims back and points them in the direction of the Smoking Mountains so they can go home! They're, uh, plainly visible just to the left.
Didn't really need that help, did they? Cera squeaks out a thanks, and Mo's pod seems to like it. Before they leave, Mo offers to show Littlefoot where he lives. Littlefoot ducks his head underwater and sees all the beauty of the ocean shallows.
This movie really does have genuinely great art and animation.
Littlefoot slips and falls in, swimming around in awe for a bit until he runs out of air and Mo pushes him to the surface. Littlefoot and Mo comment on how beautiful each other's worlds are, and then they say goodbye, while Mo leaves with his pod.
Narrator: And so, following the way given to them by Mo's waterkin, Littlefoot, Cera, Ducky, Petrie, and Spike began the long journey home.
They crossed over a river, over a gorge on a fallen tree (gotta get that trope in somehow), then climbed up the Great Wall to get home. They happily reunited with their families, and the narrator assures us though this adventure is over, they knew in their hearts there would be many more to come (because they have a deal for more sequels).
The credits song is a cover of No One Has to Be Alone by Donny Osmond:
HA! I TOLD you they wanted this to be a hit single!
Hmm. You know, I kinda have mixed feelings on this movie. In the exact opposite way that I had mixed feelings on the last movie.
In 8, the bad continuity hurt what was otherwise a great plot. In 9, the great continuity helps what is otherwise a bad plot. The big picture of 8 was good, but the details were rough. Whereas the big picture of 9 is rough, but the details are solid.
Littlefoot and Mo become "mud brothers" way too fast offscreen, I didn't buy their relationship being that close. And they REALLY want you to love Mo by the end, but I'm sorry movie, I found him a bit annoying. He had some good moments, but was otherwise pretty mediocre. Which is really damning given how MUCH screentime he had. Hyp, Ali, Doc, and even Thicknose were better guest-characters than Mo, and Chomper was WAY better. Mo is better than Dana, Dinah, and Tippy, but that's a low bar.
I was really confused by the swimming sharptooth. It felt like there was something going on there with it and Mo, and then there was nothing. Regardless, Lio had a very solid menace factor that most of the previous sharptooth encounters were missing. And the fact it was offended at the raspberry and then just left out of frustration to go home did a lot to flesh it out more than the other nameless sharpteeth.
This movie brings back the pacing issue of movies 2-5 WITH A VENGEANCE. The gang don't even start the adventure proper until the halfway point, until then it's all faffing about the New Water being potentially dangerous, imaginary friends, and hanging out with Mo.
Speaking of imaginary friends, that song SUCKED. And I would have been a little more forgiving of it if there was some payoff near the end, but nope. After Petrie finds the path, the imaginary friends are never mentioned again, making the song a Big-Lipped Alligator Moment. It kinda ties into the greater theme of loneliness, but the movie would have been better without it entirely, replacing it with more fleshing out of Littlefoot and Mo's relationship.
The racism theme exists, but you kinda have to squint and turn your head to see it. It's there in Cera's dad being cautious toward the New Water and unwilling to help the "strange creature" in it. Once the adventure begins, the racism theme is in The Gang not really respecting and appreciating Mo's language and culture until the end.
And I don't think it prehistorically tracks that ichthyosaurs were this much like dolphins. Mo is written as just a straight-up dolphin, with all the dolphin quirks and stereotypes kids associate with them.
Pros: The art is a step up, especially the water animation, which is fantastic. The continuity was fantastic. Two of the songs are great. The scenes with the diplodocus mom are the best in the movie.
Cons: The pacing is rough. The story is boring. The CGI is obvious. Mo is mediocre, despite hogging a ton of screentime. Cera's arc is a re-tread of 4. One song is terrible and pointless. Lio is slightly better than most nameless sharpteeth, but he's a little confusing.
Score: I'm giving this one a 4/10. Compared to 8, I prefer a strong plot with some holes over a weak plot with no holes, and this is the latter.
The Land Before Time: 8/10 (hypothetical uncut version: 9/10)
The Great Valley Adventure: 8/10
The Time of the Great Giving: 7/10
Journey Through The Mists: 7/10
The Mysterious Island: 9/10
The Secret of Saurus Rock: 2/10
The Stone of Cold Fire: 10/10
The Big Freeze: 6/10
Journey To Big Water: 4/10
Next Time: Say goodbye to Littlefoot's voice actor, Thomas Dekker. He was the singing voice in 5 and the main voice for 6, 7, 8, and now 9. But for some reason he left, and from 10 on, Littlefoot will have a whole new voice in every movie.
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