Hi! Name's Addie (she/her) and this is my main blog where I post and reblog almost anything.
I love video games. Survival horror is probably my favorite genre, but I play a bit of everything. I'm very big on Signalis, Half-Life, Metroid, old school PC games and all things PS1/PS2. My favorite worlds are what led to me to eventually finding my passion in writing and creating quite a few original characters to participate in them, whether through completely standalone stories set in-universe or even participating in the main events.
I'm really bad at handling side blogs, so this place is kind of a dumping ground for almost everything related to my interests and spam reblogging whatever catches my eye like art, shitposts, politics etc.
I also like to talk about how I'm doing in general, so you can expect a chain of posts like that here and there.
Some time back i've gotten into FFVII and FFXIII, and it kinda rekindled my love for writing through shipping and writing my own characters, and that's what i mainly post about. I've already finished the story of my main FFVII one - Aya - Claudia Strife's future wife who survives the Nibelheim Incident with her and this starts her journey to self-discovery. Sometimes I also write fics on ao3, so far exclusively FFVII ones, and usually involving my OCs, but I want to branch out when possible.
My other interests involve women, tinkering with electronics, 5th/6th gen computer graphics, old software, plants, image/video editing, drawing (sometimes ;-;), and I really want to get into making music, when it's possible.
Here's the list of my OCs!
I divide my posts into following tags:
text.qd - mostly text posts about anything.
ao3.qd - my writing
screen.qd - screenshots. I enjoy snapping pics in video games, and as long as there is some artistic intent to them, if that makes sense, they'll be under this tag.
anim.qd - screen.qd but gifs.
ask.qd - me answering questions
tag.qd - tag games
i already have a few ideas for ff7!Raine, and the ones i think about the most often put her in Aquana, for her to meet Aya and Claudia after they've already moved there. still, she would definitely meet Tifa, considering how often she's visiting the place, and i can imagine her moving to Eden to look for opportunities, or to help Tifa and Cloud with work. helping around the bar fits canon Raine, while working with Cloud on deliveries fits one of the Aquana concepts i had for her, being a delivery girl for Aya's shop. i think she and Cloud would get along well too.
alternatively, i can also put her in Midgar before the game, and give Tifa a friend. her loneliness is a very important arc, but i see no issue with doing so after she starts working at Seventh Heaven and reunites with Jessie, Biggs and Wedge, about two years before the events of ffvii. the issue is, i can't see her learning about Avalanche and not joining it immediately after, and avalanche!Raine sounds like a rabbit hole i'll never dig myself out of :p it's too enticing.
i love you found family trope. if there's no traces of you, i haven't written it.
Since it's been about two months since I've started working on Raine, and a very detailed outline of her story covers most of the first game already, I think it's safe to finally fully introduce her.
Ever since I've started FFXIII and quickly realized that whenever I wasn't playing, I was thinking about the game, I knew I would try making an OC. After some experimentation with backstories, I ended up with Raine. At first, I was exploring her reactions to the events of the game as a potential party member, and her relationships with the rest of the characters, but it didn't take long until I've come up with a solid foundation for her story, and I've been hard at work on her ever since, enough to put my FFVII projects aside for the time being. I can safely say she's already joined the list of my favorite OCs, and I hope to extend her story to FFXIII-2 and Lightning Returns, whenever I get around to playing them (soon).
Given the circumstances surrounding her creation, as well as my belief that FFXIII's strength lies in its characters, beyond talking events it's only fair to also cover about what lies beyond the surface, as well as how her story works with the game's themes, accidentally or not. I'm not sure how I'm gonna present her full story yet; if it's gonna be something like Aya's page or something completely different, or when that might happen, so I may as well let you in on some things now.
Raine Amaranthe is a rookie NORA member who has moved to Bodhum not too long before the Purge at the suggestion of her internet friend, Lebreau (thanks Lebreau). Given the previous experiences that made her leave her hometown in the first place, she's largely distrustful of people, and being new in the seaside town and her group of friends, she struggles with feeling like she doesn't belong.
She displays high proficiency in hand-to-hand combat, proving herself to Snow in person after he doesn't make a good impression and causes her to challenge him to a fight as a way to test her skills instead, to his reluctance. Taken aback by her speed and technique, compared to his reliance on raw strength, he ends up on the ground and welcoming her to the team. Her turbulent start with Snow causes her first days with NORA to be even more stressful than they should be, as she can feel other members' eyes on her.
Charismatic on the outside, reserved on the inside, at first Raine largely relies on Lebreau - now her roommate - for any warmth. At some point she meets Serah, who's already hanging out with Snow and therefore the rest of NORA, and they have a few friendly interactions, one of which marks the beginning of their friendship, which gives her hope that her new life can work out after all.
The day before the official start of the story, Raine gets caught by PSICOM after trying to run away with the other members of NORA, bound to board the same train as Lightning. Recognizing the soldier from her time in Bodhum and Serah's stories, she decides to keep close to her and Sazh, to stay safe and help her save her younger sister while at it, to Lightning's initial dismay.
After the group gets branded Pulse l'Cie, Raine takes it really badly and draws parallels between her current situation and previous experiences related to her identity. Put on a path with Lightning, who she's already acquainted with by this time, and Hope, who she recognizes from a pleasant interaction she had with his mom a few days back, getting progressively more worried about both, she's bound to bond with them and develop romantic feelings for Lightning, hopefully put her own differences with Snow aside, and conquer some of her own long-overstaying demons.
Themes
As a transfem, Raine fits the game's themes of hope and defying fate very well, as well as its themes of friendship and mutual support, though each of them presents itself in a unique manner compared to the canon characters, together creating something very personal for her.
Put on her last legs the moment she becomes a l'Cie, not only is she completely hopeless, but feels robbed of the life she had only started building for herself a few years ago. Having a target painted on her back, she can't help but draw parallels to her place in society as a marginalized person herself, which only emphasizes the hopelessness of her situation. She desperately tries to hold on to what's always been working for her - having a goal in mind and staying focused on it - and she relates to Lightning when she notices the similarities in her way of coping after Serah enters her crystal stasis. Still, all of her efforts are rendered insufficient and lead to further deterioration of her mental health, as seen through the development of her brand, being more accelerated than others', which eventually leads to her dramatic moment in Palumpolum, where alone, stranded and ready to call it quits, she encounters her Eidolon. Only after beating it, she decides to keep fighting as she has been for years by now, fully realizing the familiarity of her situation and settling on trying her best even if it leads to her death in the end.
Similarly, ending up in a new group of people, all branded l'Cie and put in the same situation as her - while at first doesn't mean anything to her, as she grows closer to them, meets Fang who instantly displays care for everyone, sees how Snow's presence positively affects Lightning and the others, and how everyone is there for each other, she's forced to reevaluate her distrust towards people that she's been defaulting to for years. This causes her to grow more hopeful over time, come to terms with her situation and feel like her place is with her new friends, whatever happens. With her newfound strength, later in the story she often becomes the voice of reason when others are in doubt.
Raine's personality and journey are further shown through more subtle things. Though capable of masking well, she becomes even further reserved after becoming a l'Cie. She seems to display maternal instinct when it comes to Hope, becoming another motherly/big sister figure to him as the story progresses, though she denies having it. As a result, she feels for Sazh's situation as well, yet she can't help but side with Hope and trust him when he talks about his father. For all of her history and proficiency in martial arts, she turns out to be a very delicate person - she ended up being quite similar to Tifa Lockhart in this regard - and still, she's disgruntled with Cocoon enough to side with Fang she's ready to destroy it herself to save Vanille and others, and she has her reasons for this as well. Her disdain for Snow put against times when she sees it fair to defend him is also supposed to further provide Lightning with a more level-headed view on NORA and Snow himself.
Her l'Cie brand is placed on the inner part of her right forearm, her Eidolon is Hades - a representation of death, based on an FFVII summon capable of powerful debuffs, for Raine to control it and use to her own benefit as she grows - and yet, mirroring her last name, her Eidolith takes shape of an amaranth flower - a symbol of endurance, immortality and eternal love.
Aya's growth was happening very organically on my blog as the time went on, including many meaningful changes to her story, and out of her two introductory posts none are really up to date or succinct enough to do their job. Since recently I made a Pillowfort account and had to write the introduction for her from the ground up, I figured it's as good time as any to give her a proper post here as well.
Aya Rasberry is an older sister of Jessie Rasberry and a wife of Claudia Strife. She's an ex-Shinra Census Bureau employee turned florist and a hunter, only to eventually end up as one of playable party members for the original game, following her wife's son in pursuit of Sephiroth.
Aya was born shortly after I've beaten the original game, as a result of me stumbling upon a wiki entry of Claudia Strife, reading more about her and kind of falling in love with her. Starting out as a reader-insert, she quickly evolved into an established character, sharing some similarities with me backstory and personality-wise. After a few months and fics, I started feeling unsatisfied with how she kind of existed solely to be Claudia's love interest, wanting her to become much more, rivaling some of my favorite OCs. That's when she had gotten her last name, connecting her to her sister, the backstory involving her weapon of choice, and a good start for her to eventually rediscover herself as somewhat of a warrior. This eventually resulted in her becoming my most developed and most treasured OC.
Now, I'm still working on her through crafting her AUs, one of which is exploring how drastically her story would change, if the canon thing that didn't happen for her, actually ended up happening. This universe sees her joining Avalanche along with her sister and overall leading her story in a much darker direction.
If you're by any chance interested, you can read her full story on her Fandom-style wiki page. I still need to complete some of the minor sections and add some images, but her story, as well as each section that isn't filled with TBAs and lorem ipsums, can be considered fully finished.
Here's a bit more detailed synopsis of her story (spoilers for the games ahead):
Aya starts off her story in the year 0002, five years before the events of Final Fantasy VII. That's when she's still working for Shinra Census Bureau. During her field assignment in Nibelheim, she meets and falls in love with Claudia Strife. This starts a largely long-distance relationship, that eventually results in Aya being present in Claudia's house during the Nibelheim Incident, which creates an alternative timeline where Claudia survives the massacre. The traumatic event fills already disgruntled Aya with serious hatred for Shinra, as well as fear of being possibly targeted as a survivor. This marks the beginning of her journey to leave the past behind, start her life anew with Claudia, find her partner's son, and most importantly, rediscover herself and take control of things in her life that were slowly destructing her since she could remember.
After an exhausting and eventful journey, the women eventually find themselves in a quiet coastal town of Aquana, south of Gongaga, where they decide to settle down, and later open a flower shop. Additionally, Aya, having gone through her own, more internal journey, also starts monster-hunting as her part-time job.
Aya and Claudia only manage to reunite with Cloud during the events of FFVII, through a Turk friend of Aya's who was on the lookout for him. Just before their visit to Cosmo Canyon, Avalanche takes a detour to Aquana and visits the flower shop, to the women's shock. The joy of reunion is short-lived, as both women quickly notice Cloud's weird behavior and memory issues. Aya also learns that Jessie, as well as the rest of her family, have perished in the collapse of Sector 7 plate.
Filled with sorrow and guilt about ever leaving Jessie, confusion regarding Sephiroth being alive, as well as pure concern for Cloud, she decides to join the party in pursuit of Sephiroth, causing Claudia a huge deal of worry. This begins Aya's journey to get her revenge, once again escape from the demons of her past, learn more about Cloud, and try to make him remember her and his whereabouts over the last five years. It also marks the start of Aya's deep and supportive friendship with Tifa and Cloud, to follow them beyond the original game and become very important for both of them.
well, with Aerith too, but you know... they don't get that much time. but her absence is still felt years after - that's how close they managed to become in this short span of time.
I bring a, "Aerith is a deeply flawed, self destructive person, who's emotional immaturity and refusal to trust the people around her killed her and profoundly hurt everyone who loved her" energy to the fandom that guys who want to imagine Aerith as their Cloud's tradwife really don't like.
This is also an energy Square Enix writers don't seem to like much either, because she's horrifically mischaracterized in most of the compilation material. SHE ISN'T ZACK'S TRADWIFE EITHER, CRISIS CORE
i didn't even go beyond Lightning and Claudia and how it would affect their lives yet and now that you put it this way, i'm certainly going to think about it even more...
you're right, it would be very cute, especially with Serah as kind of a big sis to Cloud. Lightning's guidance would prove useful as well, and since they share quite a bit of personality traits, he would end up looking up to her. Serah and Claudia would get along well too, no doubt.
so many possibilities, it's too good to pass up. i need it at least in some form.
If Lightning was involved in raising Cloud Strife it would put a new spin on his post memory loss attitude and personality. Lightning was designed to be like early game/post memory loss Cloud. So Cloud's brain got scrambled and the replacement persona that developed took parts from the two people he admired most: his best friend Zack Fair and his own step-mom Lightning Farron-Strife.
Tifa would lose it when she puts two and two together.
Tifa: You lost your memories and immediately started acting just like your STEP-MOM?!
Cloud: Shut up Tifa.
Tifa: I was thinking "god sometimes Cloud acts just like Mrs. Lightning on a bad day"-
Cloud: Stop talking Tifa.
Tifa: -and it was because your brain broke and decided to act like the coolest people you know: your best friend and your own step-mom!!!
Cloud: ...Tifa please
Tifa: Cloud loves his mommy SOOOOOOO much he wants to be just like her! That is just sooo cute! I cannot wait to tell her!
Cloud: Tifa. I'm begging you to stop.
(The camera pans out from an obnoxiously grinning Tifa and a despairing Cloud holding his head in his hands. They are revealed to be around a campfire... with the entire party.)
Aerith: I think that's very sweet actually.
Cloud (lying on the ground, dead inside): ...thank you Aerith.
that's so adorable! i'm completely on board with this lmao.
it really offers a new perspective on why he is the way he is, and before all that, he could still end being more cheerful, mostly thanks to Serah.
when Lightning learns about this - and she will, the girls are gonna make sure of that - she's probably gonna tear up. it fits for her to be a role model for him, and at least partially steal the spotlight from Sephiroth. and it's cuter that way. to consider your own mom a hero <3
and of course, with her around they survived Nibelheim... so yeah, 'Sephiroth' who?
Tumblr actively hunts down and deletes legit trans womens blogs as a policy but encourages and cultivates porn bots that use stolen trans sex worker's content. This is propaganda and affects how we're viewed by other users, makes our own tags unusable for us, is unfathomably transmisogynistic, and reveals a lot about how staff views us. Our bodies are a commodity that they want on their website, but our words are not welcome.
i haven't really mentioned it in Raine's intro post, but her primary roles being ravager-saboteur-synergist, also have a reason behind them, being all support-based on combat through damage and buffing, but incapable of guarding or healing through sentinel or medic, or leading through commando.
and while it probably could be placed in a better moment in the game, it still fits for her to get access to other roles with the rest of the party in chapter 10, a while into the process of coming to terms with the reality of her situation, and becoming more focused and even hopeful.
