Hi! Name's Addie (she/her) and this is my main blog where I post and reblog almost anything.
I love video games. Survival horror is probably my favorite genre, but I play a bit of everything. I'm very big on Signalis, Half-Life, Metroid, old school PC games and all things PS1/PS2. My favorite worlds are what led to me to eventually finding my passion in writing and creating quite a few original characters to participate in them, whether through completely standalone stories set in-universe or even participating in the main events.
I'm really bad at handling side blogs, so this place is kind of a dumping ground for almost everything related to my interests and spam reblogging whatever catches my eye like art, shitposts, politics etc.
I also like to talk about how I'm doing in general, so you can expect a chain of posts like that here and there.
Some time back i've gotten into FFVII and FFXIII, and it kinda rekindled my love for writing through shipping and writing my own characters, and that's what i mainly post about. I've already finished the story of my main FFVII one - Aya - Claudia Strife's future wife who survives the Nibelheim Incident with her and this starts her journey to self-discovery. Sometimes I also write fics on ao3, so far exclusively FFVII ones, and usually involving my OCs, but I want to branch out when possible.
My other interests involve women, tinkering with electronics, 5th/6th gen computer graphics, old software, plants, image/video editing, drawing (sometimes ;-;), and I really want to get into making music, when it's possible.
Here's the list of my OCs!
I divide my posts into following tags:
text.qd - mostly text posts about anything.
ao3.qd - my writing
screen.qd - screenshots. I enjoy snapping pics in video games, and as long as there is some artistic intent to them, if that makes sense, they'll be under this tag.
anim.qd - screen.qd but gifs.
ask.qd - me answering questions
tag.qd - tag games
it's finally happening. you're on your childhood best friend's bed, and she's about to take her clothes off. you wake up in the hospital, thinking you just had an unfortunately really good dream. there's a letter from her near your bed. turns out she had been wearing weights for the entire time you knew her, and the building collapsed once she took them off. she can now move too fast for the human eye to see, so you will never see her naked form in your life. hopefully you can sort this out once you're out of the hospital.
Since I've been writing about (more like obsessing over) Claudia so much over nearly the past year, I think it's time to share as many of headcanons I have for her as possible.
I already made this post before, in April 2025, but considering that back then I had only been focused on her for two months or so, it's worth making an update. Initially I wanted to just continue updating the original post, but considering the amount of additional lore analysis, tumblr posts and supplementary documents I've written about her since this time, as well as the amount of time spent thinking about her, I decided to repost it with new additions. And since I've made a Pillowfort account recently, hoping to post there consistently, as often as my health allows it, what better time than now, right?
While I decided to omit my OC ship with Claudia, some of these headcanons were visibly inspired by it and make more sense in its context. I decided to replace some of these facts with what-if scenarios where applicable. Tagging Thea and Brian Lockhart, as well as Cloud, since there's quite a lot about them here too.
While I intend for this post to be as exhaustive as possible, I might edit it in the future, considering that the list of my headcanons can only grow in size, while I'm always gonna forget about something.
General
She tends to get very sentimental. She reminisces about the old times quite a lot, has a lot of pics around her house (most of them are of Cloud) and loves looking at old photo albums.
She loved shooting pictures herself. When she was a teen, she had an instant camera she was running around Nibelheim with. Even years after Cloud was born she used to take pictures of important and/or joyful moments. After Cloud grew up a bit, presumably not really enjoying pictures of himself being taken, she haven't had many reasons to use her camera, eventually partially forgetting about it.
Aside from cooking mentioned in the canon, she loves sweets and enjoys preparing/baking them. Her favorite sweet is hot chocolate, though.
Cooking and baking can be considered her hobby, and the same goes for taking care of flowers. In general, due to her upbringing in a backwater village, and the expectations put on women in places alike, her hobbies often revolve around things in a similar fashion. She learned to enjoy these things, but it's not all she treats as her hobbies.
She's also kind of a bookworm. She always has a book to finish, lying on her nightstand. Usually they're romance novels, but she's no stranger to crime fiction too - more on that later. She gets her books from book fairs, in Nibelheim or neighboring cities she sometimes goes shopping to, courtesy of friendly neighbors that can drive, like Brian.
She's the kind of person who takes great pride in getting things done herself, including doing the work around the house. She's very crafty and, if necessary, sly. She knows how to get things done, and rarely ever she asks someone for help, unless it's something there's no way she'll manage to do herself, or something she would just hate doing. If she needs help, while she's very genuine in asking for it, willing to return a favor whenever possible, her charisma surely does half of the work to get it.
She gets very happy when she has someone around to talk to (which is kinda rare after Thea's death and Cloud's departure) and to have a partner to cook with, is a dream of hers.
In general, due to getting shunned by the townsfolk for her ambitions to leave Nibelheim when she was a child, losing her husband and Tifa's accident later in her life, she ended up being quite lonely.
Just like the rest of the town, her parents didn't really understand her and her upbringing was rather tough.
Her parents died not that long after her husband, attacked by monsters on their way to visit an extended family, essentially leaving her and Cloud alone in their family home.
Claudia has always been a good dancer, and her dream to leave the village was specifically tied to it. She wanted to become a professional dancer. Cloud being natural at dancing can be attributed to taking it after his mom, whether by pure luck, or her teaching him some basics as she was playing with him when he was little. She would probably kick everyone's ass in Just Dance too - maybe ending up tying with Tifa, who I also consider to naturally be a good dancer.
She has a very pretty singing voice too, though she never seriously thought about being a professional singer. She enjoys quietly singing or humming her favorite songs when doing chores. Whenever she was singing to Cloud before sleep, he was out in no time.
Being charismatic, she's adorably flirty towards her partners. She has her way with words, partially thanks to all the books she's read. The ease with which she can make her partner blush is addictively satisfying to her.
She keeps her hair tied and doesn't wear makeup on a daily basis, being mostly alone or with Cloud. She might subtly style her hair or just keep it loose and do some delicate makeup on special occasions like holidays and dates, though. It's not like she doesn't enjoy getting ready and "looking all pretty", but she doesn't feel the need to do it daily. She likes her looks in general.
Another thing about her hair: it's naturally spiky, just like Cloud's, and it would be even spikier if it was shorter and she hasn't been tying it all the time.
As for her clothes, considering that usually she's doing work around the house, the attire she's seen wearing in the game and things alike, are something she usually wears. She has some more flashy outfits that she keeps for the occasion. In general, she has a sense of style, originating from all the magazines from the 'outside world' she had read in her time, back when she was dreaming about leaving. She still reads them, thinking about what-ifs, and if she moved to Midgar, her daily outfits would quickly switch to something that can be considered Midgar-casual.
Claudia still thinks about leaving someday, but her opinion regarding Midgar has soured a bit due to the village's growing distaste with Shinra as a company, and all that Claudia has managed to hear from the head of Nibelheim and other people associated with Shinra a bit more than others. This doesn't stop her from considering Midgar as the place to be, as well supporting Cloud in following his dreams. Her dreams have never left her either.
Claudia already has a pretty good knowledge of basic feminism, undoubtedly partially due to what's been happening to her throughout her entire life. She always stands up for other women in the village. If she ended up in Midgar or other place less stuck in time, she would become a full-blown activist.
She has a very inquisitive nature. She's always willing to learn and participate in new things. This for example includes her participation in Zangan's (later Tifa's) morning training sessions, just out of curiosity and for the fun of it.
Claudia is the type of person to always keep a bowl of candy somewhere in the open, for her and Cloud, and whenever they would have any guests. She loves to have a treat herself whenever she keeps busy doing chores around the house or reading something. Her favorite is aniseed candy.
Having the upbringing she had, Claudia knows quite a few recipes for tried and tested remedies for various conditions. She knows her ways to help with cold, fever or even period cramps. She's by no means a specialist, but she also grows herbs that she later uses for some of said remedies.
Cloud
While learning that she was pregnant at such a young age was terrifying to her, she couldn't wait to have Cloud. She wanted to give raising him her all.
She was the one to choose the name for her child. She decided that if it was a boy, he would be named Cloud, and if it was a girl, she would be named Raine.
When Cloud was born, Claudia got some additional help from both Brian and Thea, especially after her husband's death, but after Tifa was born a year later, it was Claudia that was helping them however she could.
Just like in his later years, Cloud was a very quiet kid and considered a bit different from the rest of the kids and she did everything she could to make sure that he felt loved and accepted.
She always cared about making sure that he felt safe with her, understood and that he can talk to her about everything. She partially had her restrictive parents in mind, and she was terrified of ever becoming like them.
So after Cloud could already talk (already after her husband's and parents' deaths) he was not only the most important person in her life, but also somewhat of a friend - her respite from all the issues she could have. There was a very strong bond between them.
Just like Cloud had her, when Claudia was in doubt or feeling lonely, she knew she had her son around and they became an inseparable duo.
Little Cloud ended up sleeping with Claudia for quite a long time compared to other children. Often coming to her at night when he was scared or sad for some reason. Claudia didn't mind having her boy to hug, especially whenever her self-esteem was low or some sounds outside made her anxious.
Quite a bit of his toys Cloud got after his mom. One of them was a rag doll that her grandma made for her. It naturally ended up becoming Cloud's after he was born. He loved that doll particularly, spending time with her whenever she wasn't just on his bed. As he grew older, he kind of started being worried about how he might be perceived, so the doll has left her usual places, in favor of a box of his priced belongings. After he left, the doll ended up back in Claudia's hands, and all things considered, it's one of her most cherished possessions now.
She became quite lonely after Cloud left for Midgar, especially with him not keeping in touch that much, as well as her always wanting to give him the space she felt he needed. His departure was devastating for them both. Seeing him two years later during Nibelheim Incident was euphoric, to say the least.
While Claudia supports Cloud in his pursuits, she's worried about him, whether it's about his position in military, or just not being able to handle his life alone at such a young age, especially in a big city. Her wishes for him to find "an older, more mature girl" aren't so he can replace his mother in any way, but to have someone who's more experienced with life help him navigate until he grows up himself. And since at the time he's still a teenager, enticing him with a potential romantic interest feels natural.
After Tifa's accident, Claudia dedicated a lot of time and effort to protect Cloud from the rest of the town and his own illegitimate sense of guilt. The amount of pressure and shunning being put on them, took a real toll, especially on her child. She had to do a lot of work to ensure that Cloud felt well and that he didn't do anything wrong. She did partially forgive Brian, considering that Tifa is his daughter and that he had since shown regret for his initial reaction, but she will never forget how the entire village had treated them.
Claudia's marriage
Claudia fell in love with her husband and got pregnant rather quickly. He vowed to stay with her and raise the child after he learned about the pregnancy, seemingly throwing away his traveler lifestyle.
Her parents quickly grew to like him, since he was helping around the house and overall trying to get in their good graces, for the young couple's sake, which caused them to give Claudia a break, despite being very upset at her for getting pregnant so young and without marriage.
Still the young couple had to get married before Claudia's due date. Considering her age and the child on the way, she was head over heels for him.
Cloud's dad was rather good to him and Claudia. She remembers him as someone caring and someone she was happy with.
Still, the mystery surrounding his death (no body being found and him going to Mt. Nibel without telling her) and the gossip around town that he "could never settle down" caused Claudia to sometimes have doubts regarding his death. Whenever she was feeling extra lonely and her self-esteem was low, she was wondering if he didn't just leave her and Cloud. Over time, intrusive thoughts like this started taking a toll on her, but she never settled on the definitive answer, instead choosing to remember him how she saw him.
After her husband's death, she never really went back to dating, due to her relations with the townsfolk being rocky from the start and then Tifa's accident happening, causing both her and Cloud getting further shunned by the town.
Whenever asked by Cloud about his dad, Claudia spoke about him positively, remembering the good times they had together.
Thea Lockhart
She was a few years older than Claudia.
Claudia was best friends with her ever since they were kids and she had managed to develop a crush on her in their teens. Due to her upbringing in a secluded village Claudia brushed off her own feelings as just hormones and platonic love. In hindsight, she feels like the feelings for her never fully disappeared. It's something that Brian could at times feel, which surely contributed to the falling out they had after Thea's death. She never knew if Thea at any point was reciprocating them, aside from referencing that she was finding her attractive, just like pretty much the rest of the village. I like to think that the feeling was actually mutual, at least at some point.
Just like Cloud and Tifa had met on the water tower when Cloud wanted to tell her about moving to Midgar, Claudia and Thea liked meeting in the same place for their evenings of heart-to-hearts. During one of those meetings, Claudia confessed that she was pregnant. To Claudia personally, it kind of felt like saying goodbyes. She was very stressed about telling her.
Whenever Thea and Claudia were spending time together, so were their children. This only changed after some of Tifa's friends rejected Cloud as the weird one and then Tifa's accident happened. Shortly before that, Claudia shot a picture of Cloud and Tifa cheerfully posing in front of the water tower. This picture was one of Cloud's most cherished possessions when he was a kid. It's very important to Claudia too, as it's one of the last tangible memories of Thea she has, even if they both are absent from the picture.
Claudia and Thea remained very close until Thea's death, which Claudia was mourning heavily.
Tifa's accident had led to a very heated argument between Brian and Claudia. Claudia wanted to do all she could for Tifa while she was in a coma, but Brian, having lost his wife, being filled with grief and anger, terrified of the prospect of losing his daughter, didn't want to listen to her, instead verbally attacking her and her son. The argument has eventually led to Claudia mentioning Thea's adoration for Cloud, something she instantly regretted that only fueled the fire. It eventually ended up in her semi-admitting that she felt something for her, saying that she couldn't understand why Thea ever married him. It's something she regrets and remembers each time she's interacting with him, but also understands why she said it in the heat of the moment. They both were mourning and said very mean things to each other after all.
Despite this strong falling-out with Brian after Tifa's accident and their friendship not being the same after that, they still are on friendly terms. On each anniversary of Thea's death, they visit her grave together.
Claudia's sexuality
Ever since she started growing up, she could feel the attraction to other girls, but usually she was brushing it off as hormones and admiration, in a sense that she could mistakenly feel something romantic for the girls she felt she was idolizing. Like I said, this includes Thea, her best friend, who she always found attractive.
Brushing these feelings off came easy in a place like Nibelheim. After all, the townspeople were living by very traditional values, so coming to the conclusion that she's probably not into women was natural. What were the chances it could happen to her anyway, and a bit more subconsciously, what were the odds the women she could be into would reciprocate her feelings? For the longest time, even after partially getting over Thea, as they both got married and had kids, she believed herself to be straight.
After her husbands death, she was too busy mourning to feel any kind of attraction to anyone. She had largely forgotten about her love life, as she was busy with Cloud and grieving. It took her years to start feeling it again, and during that time, she had come to terms with being into women, and the realization that she was really into Thea. Still, aside from appreciating some pretty faces visiting Nibelheim, she never got into dating again.
Aside from Thea, she didn't really feel anything for anyone in the village. After all, she hasn't been on the best terms with most of them since she could remember. This had only gotten worse after Thea passed away and Tifa's accident happened, leaving her with no one to place trust in, let alone be romantically interested. This made the perspective of being into women in a village like this rather hopeless.
The books Claudia was getting her hands on were usually heterocentric romance, but she did end up fantasizing a bit about particular heroines in them, including femme fatales in her crime fiction. This further solidified her feelings about her sexuality. When shopping for books, she was scouting for queer romance books, and at times was successful at finding them, always ready to respond with "love is love" and "getting a different perspective" if someone bothered to ask about her choices. All in all, after Thea's death she didn't really care about what other people would say, as she was already dealing with them on the daily basis.
Some time into their adulthood, Thea learned about Claudia's attraction to women, and was very supportive and encouraging of Claudia. She kept it a secret, but she could mention it to Brian at some point, which could in turn put some things between her and Claudia into perspective for him, making him at times a bit jealous in the process, resulting in worsening the heated argument they had after Thea's death.
Having the hindsight of her life up until now, as well as no men around her that she finds attractive, Claudia doesn't think a lot about the nature of her past relationship and now considers herself a lesbian, having realized that comphet was the main reason for her blowing her chances with Thea.
i've been writing that big Aya bio for the past week or so and, a few times already, i had Aya's and Claudia's names mixed in my notes, so yesterday i commented to my partner "literally fight club" and they said "Yori as Marla" and it started.
today i woke up to a few doodles of Aya looking like the Narrator from Fight Club, Claudia trying to blow some shit up and Yori dressed in a similar style to Marla.
so in this AU Aya gets with Claudia, but she fails to save her in Nibelheim. saved by Yori, she represses the memory of Claudia and Nibelheim altogether and basically the last few months of her life end up being blank for her. she continues to work at Shinra, getting gradually more disillusioned with the company, but soon meets someone introducing herself as Claudia - a 33yo punk single mom who wants to deal as much damage as possible to Shinra, claiming that they "took her son away from her". They befriend each other and cause Aya to quit her job and start helping Claudia in destroying the company. Enamored by her looks and charisma, partially mirroring her attraction to the real Claudia, Aya basically becomes a partner in her endeavors. In the meantime, Yori finally gets laid after Aya gets together with her, but, as a trade off, she has to occasionally deal with her girlfriend's new 33yo mom persona and being called 'angel' in various situations, effectively getting more and more weirded out as the time goes on.
Aya would probably end up taking over Avalanche and turning it into something much worse. Shinra wouldn't even have to drop the plate, since she would probably do that herself, effectively killing her own loyal sister in the process, after Avalanche would evolve into a project mayhem-style movement.
shout out to my trauma-loving partner who decided to keep the necklace Aya gave Claudia on her imaginary friend-self. i only noticed this while writing this post
Vincent, the goth last year kid who writes poems about his biology teacher Ms Crescent, quiet kid and a loner + Yuffie, the hyper first year who loves decora and stealing stuff bc she's just silly like that; one day she began randomly hanging around Vincent and just kept doing it lol. Vincent doesn't mind even though they're polar opposites. she sometimes plants his poems in Lucrecia's desk. they're best friends ^-^
Shera, the fresh out of college physics teacher who's really chill and nervous and likes to wear leather jackets + my oc Faith, head of the photography club, hopeless lesbian, Shera is her inspiration and a perfect subject (Shera hates when people take photos of her and Faith does it all the time)
Jessie, the star of drama club, popular girl, likes edgy things and weird/niche topics, has a huge crush on Tifa + Thea Lockhart, Tifa has her hair tie now (I kinda messed her eyes up sowwyyyy that's what I get for drawing with pen lol)
and a little bonus - two kinds of people who overslept ft. Claudia and Cloud (Claudia is like aw shucks oh well at least I got a few winks more hehe :3c while Cloud is like. fuck. fuckfuckfuck panikk)
my banned wife @procyo9 doodled Claudia for me again
this is her as a member of P0 SOLDIER Class in an alternate universe where she leaves Nibelheim before meeting her husband and becomes a SOLDIER operative in 1988 (at the age of 19, along with Glenn, Matt and Lucia), effectively mirroring what Cloud would end up pursuing years later.
personally i don't see her canonically as someone ever joining SOLDIER or any other Shinra combat unit, but it's partially why the idea is so enticing. what if the ambitions she had as a teenager, the same ones that were so frowned upon by Nibelheim's townsfolk, led her to such a scenario?
so basically here's young Claudia Strife as a proud SOLDIER operative!
i don't know Lucia that well yet, but i think they would get along!
i was thinking about putting my Crimson in SOLDIER as well, since she has a military background as a MSF/Diamond Dog soldier. and damn Claudia would love her...
Aya's growth was happening very organically on my blog as the time went on, including many meaningful changes to her story, and out of her two introductory posts none are really up to date or succinct enough to do their job. Since recently I made a Pillowfort account and had to write the introduction for her from the ground up, I figured it's as good time as any to give her a proper post here as well.
Aya Rasberry is an older sister of Jessie Rasberry and a wife of Claudia Strife. She's an ex-Shinra Census Bureau employee turned florist and a hunter, only to eventually end up as one of playable party members for the original game, following her wife's son in pursuit of Sephiroth.
Aya was born shortly after I've beaten the original game, as a result of me stumbling upon a wiki entry of Claudia Strife, reading more about her and kind of falling in love with her. Starting out as a reader-insert, she quickly evolved into an established character, sharing some similarities with me backstory and personality-wise. After a few months and fics, I started feeling unsatisfied with how she kind of existed solely to be Claudia's love interest, wanting her to become much more, rivaling some of my favorite OCs. That's when she had gotten her last name, connecting her to her sister, the backstory involving her weapon of choice, and a good start for her to eventually rediscover herself as somewhat of a warrior. This eventually resulted in her becoming my most developed and most treasured OC.
Now, I'm still working on her through crafting her AUs, one of which is exploring how drastically her story would change, if the canon thing that didn't happen for her, actually ended up happening. This universe sees her joining Avalanche along with her sister and overall leading her story in a much darker direction.
If you're by any chance interested, you can read her full story on her Fandom-style wiki page. I still need to complete some of the minor sections and add some images, but her story, as well as each section that isn't filled with TBAs and lorem ipsums, can be considered fully finished.
Here's a bit more detailed synopsis of her story (spoilers for the games ahead):
Aya starts off her story in the year 0002, five years before the events of Final Fantasy VII. That's when she's still working for Shinra Census Bureau. During her field assignment in Nibelheim, she meets and falls in love with Claudia Strife. This starts a largely long-distance relationship, that eventually results in Aya being present in Claudia's house during the Nibelheim Incident, which creates an alternative timeline where Claudia survives the massacre. The traumatic event fills already disgruntled Aya with serious hatred for Shinra, as well as fear of being possibly targeted as a survivor. This marks the beginning of her journey to leave the past behind, start her life anew with Claudia, find her partner's son, and most importantly, rediscover herself and take control of things in her life that were slowly destructing her since she could remember.
After an exhausting and eventful journey, the women eventually find themselves in a quiet coastal town of Aquana, south of Gongaga, where they decide to settle down, and later open a flower shop. Additionally, Aya, having gone through her own, more internal journey, also starts monster-hunting as her part-time job.
Aya and Claudia only manage to reunite with Cloud during the events of FFVII, through a Turk friend of Aya's who was on the lookout for him. Just before their visit to Cosmo Canyon, Avalanche takes a detour to Aquana and visits the flower shop, to the women's shock. The joy of reunion is short-lived, as both women quickly notice Cloud's weird behavior and memory issues. Aya also learns that Jessie, as well as the rest of her family, have perished in the collapse of Sector 7 plate.
Filled with sorrow and guilt about ever leaving Jessie, confusion regarding Sephiroth being alive, as well as pure concern for Cloud, she decides to join the party in pursuit of Sephiroth, causing Claudia a huge deal of worry. This begins Aya's journey to get her revenge, once again escape from the demons of her past, learn more about Cloud, and try to make him remember her and his whereabouts over the last five years. It also marks the start of Aya's deep and supportive friendship with Tifa and Cloud, to follow them beyond the original game and become very important for both of them.
well, with Aerith too, but you know... they don't get that much time. but her absence is still felt years after - that's how close they managed to become in this short span of time.
rest in peace (probably literally since... y'know) the woman who looked like Claudia Strife with short hair, so i could headcanon her as such, who got replaced with a different model in Reunion
maybe the real Seventh Wonder of Nibelheim was Claudia Strife all along...
- she has quite a bit of muscle mass, probably working out
- she has Cloud's date of birth tattooed on her wrist which is the cutest thing i've ever seen (and the biggest surprise in the drawing)
- the mourning band tattoo isn't actually after her husband, but Tifa's mom, Thea - someone Claudia knew for her entire life in my canon
- she retains the heart necklace she got from Aya in my fic series, which means that even in this au they end up being together <3
- she's a bit more butch in this au in general, giving off that friend's cool mom vibe
- Zack's comment reflects my own experiences with friends the first time they've seen my mom picking me up from school. she was quite young herself when she had me and while my friends weren't calling her my sister, they were complimenting her looks on multiple occasions
