you know what? it’s exhausting, deconstructing the systems of oppression in our culture, day after day. checking and rechecking your every thought, media consumption, conversation for the ways you’re enacting systemic violence or oppression or marginalization or whatever else. it’s hard, constantly dealing with the dominant structures. it sucks.
but you know what? as a white, educated, middle class, cis-presenting, able-bodied, Christian, American natural-born citizen, i get the choice to not think about that shit. it’s an option for me to sit back and not think about it and live my life.
it’s not a choice for folks who are oppressed.
people of color, queer folks, gender non-conforming folks, undocumented folk, immigrants, homeless folks, lower class folks, folks of religions not supported by the dominant culture, disabled folks, and others – these people don’t get the choice to not think about the fact that they, in their very existence, are contrary to the cultural standards and structures we live in. people of color don’t get to not think about/deal with racism. queer folks don’t get to not think about/deal with homophobia. trans and gender non-conforming folks don’t get to not think about/deal with transphobia. undocumented folks don’t get to not think about/deal with xenophobia. disabled folks don’t get to not think about/deal with ableism.
friends, we need to fucking shut up. and by we, i’m talking to folks with privilege. i might be queer as fuck and not want to discuss my gender, but i benefit from enormous amounts of privilege in this country and i am talking to all those white people, straight people, middle class people, etc etc etc. you know who you are. you do. even if you don’t want to admit it.
i’m sorry you have to deal with these realities. they’re fucking shitty. i get it. but it is a ridiculous, r i d i c u l o u s concept for us to complain about or get tired of our personal responsibility to deal with it. if you’re going to complain or cry about something, cry about the reality of oppression and then take a page from Audre Lorde’s book and actually do something productive with your guilt or anger. don’t you dare cry about you personally having to work with this – it’s enormously privileged to whine about the fact that you were #blessed and you gotta help out the people you’re benefiting off of. i’m sorry you had to wake up to these horrors, but you do not get any sort of sadness points for being sad you have to actually work through the horror – there are untold numbers of people who have been living with it while you’ve been asleep.