radfem confessions

a vent blog for radical feminists <3

[radfem-confessions]

Being a lesbian in this age is so lonely and depressing. Everyone is poly, or has some deep seethed misoginy, afraid to be a butch woman they gotta be he/hims and theys, I just want a wife who's monogamous and unapologetic about being female. Our dating pool is filled with bisexuals which (no offense), but I don't wanna marry someone who's attracted to men bcs at least in my own home and relationship I wanna escape the patriarchy and any male influence. I need my matriarchal bubble in my home

[radfem-confessions]

I live in the rural US, near the tar sands pipelines (google standing rock or line 5 or line 3, if you don't know the issue). we didn't have clean water before the pipeline, and we def don't now.

We have to haul water. We have tap, but it's contaminated well water, too rural for anything other than this, and boiling doesn't get it out. We still have to shower and water our crops with it, but we can ration drinking water enough to avoid cooking/drinking it. We used to get it from a communal well, but the pipeline killed that, and it's driven up bottled water prices, since that's the only safe thing to drink.

I live with my mother, who's aging, and my useless brother. I've started hiding some of the water in my room before work, so I can "notice" we're out and pick up more, while putting the stockpiled water downstairs before I go. This way, my mother doesn't have to pay for it or carry it, but always has water. I have about a small supply of cooking/drinking water she has no clue about, and she's starting to get suspicious that I go into town (we live ~30 from a gas station) when we're low on drinking water but have more water the second I leave. I leave before we run out downstairs, restock it, and then pick more up, keep a few upstairs in case, and repeat.

She's really independent, but does a lot on our homestead and works in town. I also help w the homestead and work in town, but am I an ass for stockpiling water so she doesn't have to haul it? she has a bad back and is 60, and it's usually like 10-20 gallon jugs. I want to tell her, but I think she'd find it condescending, but it makes me feel nice to help. sory for the long rant, am stoned

[radfem-confessions]

Honestly I've grown tired of the blackpilled mindset wherein "we're not making it out of the patriarchy" and derivatives. Quickest pipelines I've seen were spun right out of the ass of the all-mighty genetic determinism as if male violence is something set in stone and unchangeable, which is simply excusing actions that most definitely aren't derived of a vacuum. If evolution teaches us something, it's that organisms are plastic in terms of adapting to surrounding conditions. What's worse, to justify doomerism they bring "nature" into this whole aspect as if we're comparable with beings that are currently slaves to their impulses. Males can do better, they just don't want to and instead want to make you believe that they're fundamentally biologically unable and to top it off, it's very effectively weaponized (otherwise this wouldn't be an issue). How nobody seems to get this is beyond me. There's no rape gene and there's no misogyny gene and even if there were they wouldn't be as fixed as you believe, so get a fucking grip

[radfem-confessions]

as a southeast asian woman who still learning about radical feminist, i feel alone in this community because i'm from southeast asia 🥲. and ofc i feel alone in my own country's feminist community because i'm an ex-muslimah (most feminists in my country are still religious btw), bisexual, and learning radical feminist 🥲. btw, is there any southeast asian radfem (or rad-adjacent) here?

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[radfem-confessions]

Auntiewanda and her gaggle of friends make me so uncomfortable. They are hard to escape on radblr everyone supports her it seems, even when shes blatantly racist and stomping on woc radfems to shove her own white opinions onto it while not actually understanding what we are fighting for..

[radfem-confessions]

i see a lot of posts about not “people pleasing” but a lot of the time its just people looking to be pieces of shit for no reason

[radfem-confessions]

im sorry but i need to rant. it hurts very much that i never get allowed into radfem discord servers. i wanted to dedicate all my time to creating a radical feminist website but its literally impossible to contact other radfems. getting rejected by other radfem women hurts more than anything my heart is broken. it hurts so much, ive been extremely suicidal lately and have been in a really toxic group of people the last few years who have beaten me down and this just makes me feels like theres nowhere for me. my beliefs are very strong and i struggle wanting to tolerate non-radfems. im dying to talk about it with other women and perfect my rhetoric. im so passionate and ready to fight but i always get flagged, i genuinely dont know why, maybe my prose isnt good enough, idk

[radfem-confessions]

When I was 14-15 (like a year before I became a radfem) I had this whole blog where I would poorly photoshop the bush off of vintage porn because I thought it made the pictures more appealing. I genuinely cannot explain my motivation for doing this. I guess I thought vintage porn was less degrading but I wanted them to be my version of attractive? I don’t know why I’m sharing this but it feels like no other crowd would understand

[radfem-confessions]

i had an abortion just over a year ago, and it fucked me up for a long time. now this might sound horrible, but for a lot of that time when i was grieving i imagined my hypothetical child to be a girl. as soon as i pictured myself hypothetically giving birth to a boy i felt a lot better about my decision.

[radfem-confessions]

i get so fucking sick of how radblr treats the term "delusional" and even actual mental illnesses (cluster b as an insult???? STOP). i get that they probably aren't specifically trying to say anything bad about people with issues like mine but please gain some understanding of what a delusion actually is and how just Being Incorrect is not what it is. also why the fuck does radblr fall for extremely obviously fake/bait posts so often please gain online literacy pl0x love you xo

[radfem-confessions]

every time i see f**bleh*mo make another post begging for weed money i get one step closer to becoming an actual radfem. easily the most obnoxious TIM on this site

[radfem-confessions]

Why are so many older transwomen so bad at colour matching their clothes. They go around looking like a nightmare Barbie because they just wear red and pink.

[radfem-confessions]

At this point I feel a lot of the oppression women face is often based on the idea of a woman as a manipulator, (if she cries her tears are fake, every word she says must be picked apart for lies, body gestures are psychoanalysed and diagnosed) which is seen as the ultimate evil far worse than any male action (see amber heard)... and that this is very similar to the oppression/bigotry against bi women ('cluster bi') on the most toxic 'radfem' tumblr communities (eg, ask blogs).

[radfem-confessions]

I'm really starting to believe I'll never find any other lesbains, not just a girlfriend but just friends and women I could look up to, it's soooo unbearably lonely. I literally don't know a single lesbain in my city and dating apps don't belp because it's full of tifs and bisexual girls with no experience with other women. Feeling hopeless gyn </3

[radfem-confessions]

I feel like older radfems don't realize how young some of us are. No I can't go to any protests because I can't drive, no I can't go to any bars to find other lesbians because I'm underage, no I can't join any lgb(t) groups because I'm not old enough. It's so tiring and makes me feel alienated when I'm already ssa

[radfem-confessions]

there might not be a "rad to trad pipeline", but I've seen gender critical women turn into anti-vaxxer conspiracy theorists more often than I'd like :/

[radfem-confessions]

I just want to vent because some straight guy just told one of my few male friends that he "gives off trans vibes" and that he would quote unqoute "slay" as a trans woman

And that male friend is gay

I am just dumbfounded and really weirded out, like who tf brings shit like that up in casual conversation