Never Been The Kind To Let Them In

Sara |AZ |23| Taken

[thoughtkick]

“please don’t come closer unless you plan to stay”

— Unknown

[sleepbby]

[ojibwa]

[wishing-for-deathx]

I look at others and I feel so sad for myself. I’m just existing. And they are living. They are able to move on and get ahead in life but all I do is stay stuck in the past and suffer

[its-just-mads-inactive]

It’s getting bad again but it never even got better.

[wishing-for-deathx]

The way I think of it is that I’m completely worthless and people don’t even give a fuck about me but if anyone bothers to waste their precious life on me it will only be to hurt and break me because for some reason I’m not aware of, that’s all I deserve and am destined for

[wishing-for-deathx]

I’m such a horrible person, I deserve all this pain and agony I’m in. Maybe that’s why I can’t die, because I need to suffer for my sins

[kea9]

[wishing-for-deathx]

I cannot remember the last time I had a good nights sleep. Sometimes, I lay awake being tortured by all my thoughts. Even if I get some sleep, I wake up every two hours. If not this, then it’s the nightmares.

[wishing-for-deathx]

How is it fair that my normal day is worse than a regular person’s bad day? There’s so much pain and I don’t think my body can contain it anymore. Please let me die. I just really want to die.

Being depressed is no way to live.

[wishing-for-deathx]

To think I had the audacity to believe that someone would want a person like me. But life always shows me the reality and that is that I am meant to be alone. I am an unlovable piece of garbage, nobody is ever going to want me. And the sooner I get that into my head the better it will be for me.

[wishing-for-deathx]

Ever cried in your bed curled up in a ball because you’re alive and can’t die?

[suckmyassbitchh]

i don’t understand.

everything i do or say is always wrong and i don’t understand that. i try my hardest but it’s never good. i try to make people happy and make them feel like how they should be, happy and cared for but i just feel like i never get that back. i’m honestly getting to the point again where everything is going so far down, i don’t even know what to do or feel any more.

i don’t understand why i am like this. why do i please people more than i please myself. i know i’m hurting myself but i can help see other people in pain or feeling low. i hate that i can’t love myself and treat myself like how i should. i just want someone to help me the way i help them but i feel like i’m too far down to get that and i know i can’t pull myself up.

i don’t understand myself.

[mentalwordvomit]

Sometimes I wish my poor mental health would manifest physically so people around me would take it more seriously

[seashellronan]

i want to go home. i will always want to go home. even when i am at home i want to go home. but i’m not really thinking of a place, it’s more that feeling of everything finally being over, of seeing the light in the windows of your house on a cold night, of being safe, the relief of leaving a party you’re not enjoying, like when you felt sick at school and they sent you home, or when you got upset at a sleepover and they called your parents. i want my mam to come get me. i want to go home.

[seashellronan]

elizabeth wurtzel, prozac nation // lorde, ribs // maggie stiefvater, the dream thieves // billie marten, red sea blue sea

[ryebreadgf]

karen russell, st. lucy’s home for girls raised by wolves

[maryolive]

i like to fork myself by daul kim // road music by richard siken // art by beth fuller // sarah addison allen // why be happy when you could be normal? by jeanette winterson // poetry by @jonismitchell

[tfw-adhd]

[tastefullyoffensive]

My kind of party. (via _cooper)

[dutchster]

Wait! there’s more!

this is the best thing ever