Really F**king Useful Stuff

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Did you know...

You’re on Tumblr right now.

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Found this on the internet awhile ago, it’s not my photo. 

But if your mother is like mine and says she’ll teach you how to wash clothes when you’re 14 and then 7 years later you know less about a washing machine (That’s the one you can put dishes and the cat in too, right?) than ever - this’ll probably help.

If you already know this stuff and do your own laundry then please come to my house and wash my clothes for me. I can pay you in dirty socks.

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Is your egg too old?

Get a jug/bowl/bathtub/swimming pool of water, whatever will hold enough water to fit 2 eggs on top of each other.

Place the egg in it, if it floats don’t damn well eat it. 

If it doesn’t, enjoy your chicken period on toast or something. 

(If it’s trying to float but still touches the bottom of the container, it’s still good. )

If your egg has hatched I would also suggest not eating it and not putting the contents in water.