just overheard somwone say "hey dude i dont see the future I've got two balls and neither is made of crystal" and im absolutely losing it

#extradirty
$LAYYYTER
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@realotterinwater
just overheard somwone say "hey dude i dont see the future I've got two balls and neither is made of crystal" and im absolutely losing it
accidentally said "invasive thoughts" instead of "intrusive thoughts" today and actually I think I'm onto something. this thought does not belong here and it is harming the local ecosystem
my favorite genre of post. if only I could find more
paper and pen seems so powerful now. on account of all the. surveillance
How do you like it.
why do US patriots think they own "red white and blue" there's a lotta red white and blue flags out there. "i stand for the red white and blue" yass me too let's go costa rica 🇨🇷🇨🇷🇨🇷🇨🇷 let's go laos 🇱🇦🇱🇦🇱🇦🇱🇦 fuck it up liberia 🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷 nepal get triangular with it 🇳🇵🇳🇵🇳🇵
If Ratatouille mechanics were real, there would be a whole market of businesses offering the services of operating rats to people who want them, and it'd be like how bees produce honey. People in the rat business would be so exhausted of having to explain over and over again that no, the rats aren't being exploited. If the rats didn't like how they're being treated, they would simply not return. There's no goddamn way to force a rat to be so passionate about playing the saxophone that they'll figure out how to puppeteer a human to do it for them. All that the business does is finding a way to put that specific rat in the hair of someone who's about to go on stage.
wanted to draw my beautiful wife dana evans because she’s coming back to me in 4 days <3
If I scratch someone is that organ harvesting
my hips don't lie but they will exaggerate details, misrepresent the facts, and on occasion deceive via omission of crucial information
in retrospect my father was kind of iconic for how he handled it when he called someone a twat in front of little kid me and i asked what that word meant. the answer he came up with was, and i’ll always remember this, “no one knows what it means. it’s a mystery”
do not post your ugly ass boyfriend for valentine's day bc my week has been bad enough
thank you for putting a random white boy on my post i guess
he will be going in the acid though goodbye white boy
OP NO. ADDING A WHITE BOY TO A VAT OF ACID CREATES A "THE JOKER.:
fuck.