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Ranking Nasty Trek Figural Mugs

a few of those extremely creepy Applause figural mugs are making rounds again. I looked it up, there are twenty. I decided to rank them. Images sourced from random eBay listings. (apparently, some people collected full sets?)

1. Gorn. a perfectly charming acceptable mug. I’d be proud to drink out of this boy. definitely aided by how plasticky the Gorn’s head already looks. confused by the width of the yellow stripes. disappointed they didn’t attempt to go for the magical disco eyes.

2. Worf. already a little dead-behind-the-eyes but far better than the later examples (oh, we’ll get there). again, helped by the fact that Worf’s face is made distinctive via hair and prosthetics.

3. ‘Borg’. they kept it non-specific so I can’t needle them about a bad likeness (I just used Hugh because… Hugh) but I will say that this looks far more spy-gadget than borg. also, uh, you might want some help with the eyeshadow fallout there, buddy,

4. ‘Cardassian’. again, helped out by not specifying, but he looks depressed (’s why I went with Damar). I really hate the deep grey wrinkles/ridges. nasty. points for a decent spoon, though.

5. Geordi. we can’t see the eyes so they didn’t have the opportunity to make them creepy- definitely a good thing. there’s something weird about his mouth.

6. Sisko. uh… I don’t like it. 0% of Avery’s charm transferred. a bit malevolent.

7. Beverly. resembles Gates in no way but not actively offending to my sensibilities? what is that hair

8. Deanna. ew. blank personality-less doll. this list is starting to get creepy.

9. ‘Kazon’. first of all, I’m truly bewildered as to why they chose to go for a Kazon as one of their twenty Trek designs? they obviously felt bad about how few Voyager characters they’d picked but- who even remembers the Kazon that well? second of all, bad.

10. Q. this is garbage, they’ve ripped away his sex appeal! can you imagine this soulless ken doll flirting with Sir Patrick Stewart? NO. where’s his chin. where’s his lipstick. SHAME this mug.

OK, we’re getting down to the real unacceptables here.

11. Odo. on the one hand, I enjoy the existential emptiness of this one (same, bro) but on the other hand it is WRONG. this should’ve been the easiest one! Odo doesn’t really have any facial features! his eyes are so blue, his hair is so brown, I’m so confused…

12. Bones. look, I don’t even really know what to say about this one. De Kelley’s charming smirk has been turned into… that. I feel like that mug stole my lunch money.

13. Spock. HOW DARE THEY. his ears are so thick, not the curling delightful vulcan ears he’s due! Leonard’s face is graceful, elegant. this is just sad. green eyeshadow? green??? so weird.

14. Jim. I’m sorry, who is this exactly? I have not met this man. atrocious.

15. Quark. deeply cursed. the eyeliner really makes it what it is.

16. Janeway. the sheer fuckin’ audacity someone must’ve had to look at this fucking thing and declare it an acceptable bastardisation of Kathryn’s beautiful face!! the lips? the brows??? the everything? Kate is fine-boned and delicate.

17. Riker. ok, to be fair, this mug made me sob with laughter.

18. Jadzia. BAD! VERY BAD! LOOK AT TERRY! LOOK BACK AT THE MUG! BAD!

Bonus: they made her beautiful Trill spots look like sperm! AAHH!

19. Neelix. there are not words in the English language to describe how viscerally ugly I find this mug.

20. Data. why is this the worst offender, you ask? (actually, you probably don’t.) Data is supposed to be full of love! and this is a hollow demonic being! how could anyone do this to our boy. HOW COULD THEY. -1000000/10, this mug is a monstrosity.

And that’s all 20! I’m sorry.

nonbinary-bosmer

The Riker and Dax ones look like they’ve been touched somewhere very sensitive by some very cold.

And that Neelix mug will haunt my dreams forever.

thefingerfuckingfemalefury

I feel like these mugs are Extremely Haunted

That Riker mug has experienced some kind of trauma

What have his ceramic eyes seen

what has he witnessed

what horrible secrets does he know

I fear the answers to these questions O.O

asymbina

There are some genuinely bizarre choices in who got mugs here

And these are cursed

thefingerfuckingfemalefury

Part of me is sad that more deserving characters were ignored while a random Kazon was included…like…were they even that iconic? I can understand including a random Borg and The Gorn since they are probably some of the most recognisable species from the show that even non-Trek fans would recognise…but were the Kazon even that popular WITHIN the fandom?

But another part of me is like…maybe it’s for the best that none of my other faves were turned into Haunted Mugs…

(Old Timey New England Stephen King character voice) Sometimes no mug is better…yessir…sometimes no mug is better…

#oh my GOD #what

the-moon-loves-the-sea

!!!

Also in the New York Times and the Guardian. Article with no paywall here: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/mar/14/anti-inflammatory-drugs-may-aggravate-coronavirus-infection.

French minister says patients should take paracetamol rather than ibuprofen or cortisone

yipyap

oh wow jesus christ

awesome-picz

People Are Sharing Pics Of Their Long Cats That Seem To Stretch ‘Til Infinity.

catleecious

dailyrothko

Mark Rothko, No 10, 1952

outofcontextbonappetit

midnightradio

it’s alive is a comedy show pt. 2

#respect hunzi

fuckyeahchinesefashion

nifeandaccurate

from the tags: #The kitten fell from the second floor and got stuck #The big cat is not the kitten’s mother it is the next door neighbor’s cat brought by the girl who made the video

sugarpkts

lists are snacks for your brain. i will not elaborate

cats-and-company

Queen.

candiikismet

I always have to reboot this.

ordinaryredtail

For anyone wondering, this is amazing enrichment for the animal and a great way to involve guests! The lions aren’t forced to play with the rope if they don’t want to, and these guys (and anyone else who tries this out) have an awesome close up and hands on experience, all without having to come in direct contact with the cat!

little-miss-mash

@why-animals-do-the-thing

why-animals-do-the-thing

This definitely counts as #actually cute. This video is from the San Antonio Zoo, and the lioness’ name is Axelle. As @ordinaryredtail said above, the tug of war interaction is entirely voluntary on her part.

My guess is that the zoo staff did use some positive reinforcement training to teach her how to pick up and pull on the rope at first, because that’s not necessary something a lion would just do on their own. While it’s also probable that she’s rewarded with something tasty did choosing to engage with the members of the public like this, Axelle wouldn’t be engaging if it was a negative experience for her (there aren’t enough snacks in the world to coerce a lion into doing something they find actively distressing). If she didn’t want to participate, she could just walk away.

Some sanctuary and animal rights groups have taken issue with this interaction because they consider it unethical to ask a lion to engage in any “unnatural behavior” “for the benefit of the public,” calling it exploitation. It is worth keeping in mind, however, that learning and engaging in novel behaviors is hugely enriching for animals in human care, and that lions have no concept of exploitation. As long as the lion is not bothered by the presence or noise of the crowd, is not injured or harmed, and is engaging on an entirely voluntary basis, this sort of thing is entirely ethical. It is far safer than any type of interaction where a member of the public is coming into direct context with a big cat, but still allows people to directly experience the sheer strength of a lion up close.

bookgeekgrrl

#3beefcakes v. one good girl (via @doctortay)

lena-luthor

With so many schools closing due to COVID-19, there are thousands of children who will be missing out on daily meals that they need to survive. I just donated to Feeding America. Every dollar they receive helps them feed up to 10 meals to people in need. Please consider contributing to a similar charity or local food bank if you can afford it. Cheers everyone, stay safe.