mals @redrvbins - Tumblr Blog

There comes a time when fandom becomes less of an escape from anxiety to being the source of anxiety. Sometimes I need to remind myself what’s important to focus on, and I made this chart to help me with that.

(Posting this at the request of a few people. The design/concept was inspired by an instagram post about covid-19 located here).

#important #reminder

plagueislost

happy birthday tim!

ashoss

i miss my father and daughter

timdrakelonghairtruther

Special thanks to my friend who saw the sketch and said I need to make him arch his back even more

cecikiwi

tell me that you'll never leave me

michaeljoncarter-deactivated202

dying @ the fact that Blackest Night: Batman #3, where tim has to fight off the evil reanimated corpses of both his parents and their murderer, Adventure Comics (2009) #3, where tim sees kon for the first time after his resurrection and has a nervous breakdown in the parisian sewers, and Red Robin #5, where tim almost gets assassinated & loses his damn spleen, all came out on the exact same day. october 14 2009 first international tim drake fucking struggles day

burritowitch

happy tim drake fucking struggles day

silverwhittlingknife

tim drake's no good very bad day

sohotthateveryonedied

Do you have any more ideas or plot bunnies for your “I see dead people” au? It’s one of my favourite series on ao3. I think more stories should make Tim be a little more fucked up… also I love drama and angst, and addiction is so good at creating drama and angst

i actually have a whole document about a relapse fic because i'm a sucker for angst, but i doubt i'll ever get around to writing it because i liked the way i ended things in the series and this would be a whole 'nother can of worms, but i can give you all the highlights of the notes i have on this concept:

Tim relapses after being in Mr. Oz’s prison; while he was trapped there, the only people he had to talk to were the ghosts of his past, but as the isolation took over and he started losing touch with reality, he lost touch with them as well. He started to see people he thought were living—Dick and Bruce and Damian; they’d show up to rescue him and then halfway through the delusion they’d vanish. Then the worse ghosts come, dead villains and people he failed.

It fucks him up.

When he’s back in Gotham, he really does try. He doesn’t want to destroy all the progress he's made, but the voices get so loud and it’s too overwhelming, Tim can’t take it. So he finds a dealer in Crime Alley and buys a baggie of Xanax. Just to take the edge off, he reasons with himself. He’s clean now, he knows his limits. He’s not going to let it be a problem again this time.

Obviously it becomes a problem.

Tim goes about his life like normal except nothing is normal. He can’t pay attention to anything Bernard is talking about on a date because he hasn’t had a dose since this morning. Bernard asks if Tim is feeling sick; Tim brushes it off. Liar, Alfred's ghost whispers somewhere behind him. He excuses himself to the bathroom and snorts two crushed-up pills off the back of his hand.

Jason notices because he’s Jason. “He’s using again, you know that right?” Bruce and Dick says no he’s not, they would notice if he were using again. But Jason can always tell. Tim’s just gotten better at hiding it. He doesn’t know what Tim’s on this time, but he’s definitely on something.

Meanwhile Tim has started taking Oxy because the addiction is different this time around, the same things that worked before don’t work as well on him this time, he needs more of it. He needs to stop seeing them. Needs to stop feeling.

You’re losing it, he hears Dana's corpse croon in his ear.

Bruce confronts Tim, who insists he's doing fine and everything is normal. Bruce calls his bluff; “Then you won’t be opposed to a blood test?” “Sure, let’s do it. If that’s what it’ll take to get you guys off my back, then fine.” He follows Bruce to the hallway, then slams the door behind Bruce’s back and locks it. It isn’t going to actually stop him, but it’ll give Tim the ten seconds he needs to get out the window.

Tim stays gone for three days. He's hiding out at one of his safehouses that none of the others know about.

He just bought a fresh bag of Oxy from some sketchy guy he’s never bought from before, but he’s desperate. Usually he scans everything he buys and makes sure it’s safe and as pure as he can get, but hard times and all that. He injects it and lets the high wash over him, silencing the ghosts again. He sits on the floor because walking to the bed is too much work. He’s completely alone. Not even the dead for company. It’s like being in the cell all over again, and he can’t take it. He fumbles for his burner phone and calls Jason.

“Tim, is this you?” Jason answers even though he wouldn’t have this number saved anywhere. Have they all been worried this whole time? Tim sniffles. “Hi, Jay.” “Kid, where the fuck are you?”

“Don’t tell Bruce, please don’t tell Bruce, he’s gonna be so mad at me.” “He’s not mad, he just wants you to be okay. I’m gonna come get you, and we’ll talk about it, all right? We can figure it out.” “He’s gonna hate me.” And Tim feels sick, sicker than the withdrawal.

He can hear Jason calling his name from the phone he's dropped on the floor. “I don’t feel good, J’son.” He lies down staring up at the ceiling, and he sees his own face swimming above him, except that doesn’t make sense because Tim isn’t dead, right? He’s not a ghost.

Is he?

Tim wakes up in the hospital. “Wh’t…” “You overdosed on fentanyl.” Makes sense. He was too eager for a high he didn’t bother to check what he was putting into his body.

Bruce explains that Tim has been in the hospital for a day now, he’s in the thick of withdrawal. They’re giving him regular doses to keep the come-down from killing him, but no more than that. He’s going to be feeling like this for a while now. Tim remembers how bad it was the first time. He starts crying, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” “It’s all right, son. You made a mistake. I’m not going anywhere.”

aaaaaaaand that's all i've got ❤️

(feel free to ask me about follow-ups or scrapped sequels to other fics of mine because i have so many it's not even funny, i literally have a whole google docs folder titled The Vault™️filled with pieces of fics that i've cut out or sequels i gave up on lmao)

spoilerrralert

TIM DRAKE FAN FICTION RECOMMENDATIONS!!

(aka me rambling about my faves)

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Tractors by lieu 42- gutwrenching and perfect. one of my favorite portrayals of tim, and favorite fics ever! really does justice to all of the complicated / bittersweet relationships of the comics, familial and romantic. i’d especially recommend if you’re fond of the young justice team. kind of writing that will stick in your head.