omg you’re so right men are not dangerous to women at all so i guess i can totally go out alone at night all by myself and if i get raped by a man it will surely mean nothing and i should keep trusting men and think there is nothing wrong with them 😍😍😍
Trusting every strange man in the dark ≠ understanding that men aren’t ontologically evil, OR necessarily your personal oppressors, which is what I am saying. Women have literally killed or gotten killed men (especially men of color) that THEY have privilege over on some axes due their fear. So yeah, there is a way to fear men too much. This is how you get radical feminism. This is how you get TERFism. It feeds hate groups like MRAs to be genuinely hated for the way they were born. And it’s not how you progress actual intersectional feminism. To do that, you have to heal your relationship with men. I’ve been raped by men. I’ve been abused by men. But I understand that, while the societal conditions men are raised under (patriarchy, rape culture) contributed, it happened because they’re personally terrible people, not because they were born male. Acting like it is can lead you to dismiss the fact that women can pose just as much of a danger if they’re similarly terrible people. So, I’m working on healing my relationship with men. When you’re ready, you should too. I promise you it feels better than being uneasy for the rest of your life.
Im just discovering these people and their…..interesting ideas. Now i’m curious (and a bit baffled at these opinions) :
Why is it that everyone is okay with admitting that one group is oppressing another except when it comes to men ? why do you guys struggle so much with that ? you seem to be fine with saying « cis people this » « white people that », or even more specific stuff like « cis white women this » (and i have no issue with this, you can make statements about social groups) but now people say something about men and suddenly it’s an issue ? you cannot be selective and personally decide which groups are fine to make general statements about and which groups aren’t.
There is nothing wrong or evil about saying that men are oppressing women. It’s an observation, based on centuries and centuries of oppression. It’s a FACT. You can dislike it all you want, that will not make it less true. Yes that argument can be reclaimed by transphobes or racists, but these are people who only pretend to care about a very selected part of what makes women.
And there is a flaw in your argument as you just oppose men abusing women as : they did it bc they are bad people vs they did it bc they were born male. Both are wrong. Saying that a man who abuses a woman did it because he is just a bad person erases all the women who have been abused by men who were seemingly « good people » in everyone’s eyes. Yes abusing someone makes you a bad person because you did a bad thing. But there is no sign before that that tells you a man will do this to you. And it’s neither because they were born male. Because sex isn’t gender. And being a man is something taught through socialisation, education, norms and values. This is where men easily learn to become oppressors, even when they don’t realise it. The system that opposes the male and female gender as two social groups is what creates the power imbalance. Even the sweetest nicest guy can rape a woman, because he just learned that it was something he could do, that he could take whatever he wanted from women. So, you need to have more nuance than : abusers=bad people. because that is purposely ignoring the correlation between gender norms and rape culture. You did slightly mention something similar in your answer, so I think you’re not that far from figuring out.
Because I don’t agree with the « born male » thing, i don’t agree with most radfems either as I don’t agree with the trans exclusionary part of feminism. But i guess that eventuality is impossible to people like you ? Even though most people around me also feel that way. Even trans men and cis men. They take no offense when we joke about men and they sometimes have even more extreme takes than me or some of my female friends do. And that doesn’t make them lose their masculinity and that doesn’t make them bad people or oppressors. But I guess you don’t care about nuance and will box us into the terf category anyway, despite how much we disagree with them, just because we don’t think we should start hating on women who hate men ?
And before you project the terf’s bathroom rethoric onto me to make yourself feel better and comfort your opinions, i don’t agree with it. I live somewhere where there are gender neutral bathrooms everywhere and it’s perfectly fine. But men there are more educated on systemic sexism and more aware of rape culture. Which is making a difference. Even though it isn’t perfect, of course, and even there i have witnessed acts of sexual violence from men (but not in the bathrooms, as much as terfs would want that to happen to prove their points). So that doesn’t however make men suddenly harmless and that doesn’t end the threat that they represent to women, in public like in private spaces, strangers, family, coworkers or close friends.
Coming in here and making it all about you : « well actually i am a man and i am a nice guy🥺 » « well actually i walked home at night and *I* didn’t get assaulted, you guys are paranoid😘 » is honestly completely insensitive. Why not come for the men who make an environment feel unsafe, instead of coming for the women who perceive it that way ? I know that many men outside aren’t dangerous, but knowing that even one could be, without knowing which, is enough to not feel completely safe and to not trust strangers. Yes it is more likely to happen in your close circle, but the chances are not zero, and that is enough to at least be a little careful.
Over and over it’s just : « if you disagree with me you are a mean radfem and i put you on the bad people list🥺 ». Just accept that women will hate men as long as men will oppress them. You want to stop misandry ? Go fight misogynist. They are already stoning and harassing misandrist anyway. You guys also coming at them is just joining hands with misogynist and picking more stones to throw. Misandry will never ever be as bad as misogyny, historically and statistically, one did much more harm to society than the other.
I personally don’t hate men, but I don’t care if some women do, they have their reasons. They come from a place of trauma, fear, and turned it into rage. It’s not a completely new and shocking way to cope. It’s sometimes even a step towards healing. Dedicating entire think pieces and posts about how these women are bad people, while making posts about how great men are, is just burying your head in the sand and ignoring the current issues. You are siding with the oppressor, as much as you want to claim you aren’t. Women who hate men are not your enemy, in fact, they are victims just like you, and misogynist men will not spare you just because you keep bowing down to them. But if you want to keep shooting at the squirrels while a bear is charging you……
And these rethorics just scream chronically online to me. It’s the completely disconnected from reality « let men be masculine✨ » type of bullshit. You are so deep into your niche online discourses that you have started to believe that this other small community are the big bad oppressors of your life. Yes women also abuse and harass people, but that isn’t a systemic issue related to their gender (it can be related to race, social class, sexual identity or many other factors), unlike what men do. Of course white women, rich women or cis women can exploit the power imbalance between men and women and can use it to place themselves as victims but they also come from a place of power compared to the other person (because of race or social class for example). Making it about a « women discriminate men » thing is turning a blind eye to the real reasons behind those discriminations.
« but what about the men who are NOT abusers🥺 » do you want a medal for that ? Is it really the stance you want to take today ? You look at the news and the state of the world and you think : oh yeah, the worst people are definitely those few women who hate men and mistrust them because of what they have been through. If you were at least a little better at choosing your words and caring for victims, maybe it would not be perceived that way. But you sound like a masculiniste.
Reading some comments here and there : « so women can say they hate men but if *i* say i hate women im a bad person? » « it’s just a small percentage !! »[about men being abusers]. I would recommend you guys to reconsider the way you word your opinions because these takes sound straight out of some incel forum. And yes, both of these sentences sound extremely misogynistic.
i hate this sites music taste so much its literally Racism The Music Taste site. you guys dont like rap you dont like jazz you dont like country you dont like blues you dont like ska you dont like reggae you cannot CONCEPTUALIZE listening to foreign artists you dont even know what turbofolk is you cant conceive of music existing out of anglosphere you think that mcr is punk and its the end-all of definition of "punk" for you i hate everyone here like WHAT music do you people even listen to what the fuck is left
If you haven’t listened to the music of this wonderful singer/songwriter from Australia, I recommend you do it now !!!
I really love her voice, as well as the lyrics she writes. She has funny, cool melodies such as « pressure to party » or « you were right » or beautiful melancholic songs like « don’t know how to keep loving you » and « when the family flies in ».
Her album « crushing » doesn’t contain a single bad song !!
theartofmadeline
amandla
gummygunk
dailybridgerton
turnnoffyourmind
tangentwithtanner
