Welcome to my cove! This is my personal blog. My friends call me rel/cherry. I am 20+ years old Filipino artist. I go by she/her.
My posts might feature adult content such as blood, gore, and heavy/suggestive themes.
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͙͘͡★ Malevolent
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Can you give me some Hyuluka fic recommendations, please🙏?
Anon, ngl you’re probably asking the wrong person for fic recs (also I’m pretty sure half the hyuluka fandom reads the same stuff) but here’s a few off the top of my head
(Keep in mind I go by lore-ic for a reason, I tend dig extremely plot/lore heavy stuff)
Delusions of Domesticity by Loreic [completed, E-rated]
Shameless self-plug, wrote this when I burned through the entire hyuluka ao3 tag after Weige and decided fk it I’ll do it myself
Canon-divergence from Round 5 onwards
Pretty screwed up concept (because so is my brain), and I’ll admit not everyone’s cup of tea so read at your own risk
Aubade by Kaden [ongoing, M-rated]
Love of my hyuluka life
Fluff and angst hospital AU, featuring a terminally ill Luka who crosses paths with Hyuna and Hyunwoo
It’s giving Fault in Our Stars. Peak fic with frequent-ish updates, but Kaden will probably break your heart (to give you context an aubade means lover’s farewell at dawn)
Learn to Forgive by Aniiina [completed, M-rated]
One of the rare, completed, the rebels-saved-Luka-too fic
Canon-divergence from Round 5 onwards, fluff and angst (more angsty tho)
The ending is a little abrupt for me but it’s still a pretty solid fic
Alien Stage Modern AU by Auphoria [one-shot collection, G-rated]
Consist of 3 extremely underrated standalone one shots
Modern AU featuring various scenarios ranging from fluff to crack
Read it after Weige broke my heart and it’s been sitting in my bookmarks ever since
Bauble by Valleykey [completed, T-rated (but I would rate it M tbh)]
Oneshot, kinda weird in a good way?
That one well-written Mer AU. Solid lore and characterization.
Did not think I would dig a Mer AU but the hyuluka interactions and characterization is just that good
Honorable mentions:
Lulu by nullbird [incompleted, T-rated]
Only has two 2 chapters, but I just love the concept and plot potential so it's been sitting in my bookmarks
Features the rebels find a toddler clone Luka and Hyuna dealing with it
You Are The Hymn of my Existence by Anon [one-shot collection, G to E-rated]
One of the oldest collections on ao3
If you thought delusions of domesticity was screwed up, there is some stuff this collection that basically quadruples it, but then you also get random, really cute ones
This beast has 28 PARTS, and I’ll admit some of the characterization of the older works is a little outdated and some of it is in 2nd pov (which I just can’t get over), but most of them are still pretty a good read
The works in there vary a lot, I’ve only read a few, so I think it’s better to just leave the collection here and you can go check out what floats your boat
Side note: I’m not really into ABO so that basically cuts down all the available fics by half. I’m also pretty sure there is a bunch more awesome stuff out there but I don't really dare to rec stuff with infrequent updates (except Lulu lol) and the rest are mostly one shots. They tends get drowned in the tags pretty quick, and I can’t seem to effing locate them.
me when the character has a uniquely fucked mindset. me when the character's fundamental views of how the world works lead to them being hurt and/or hurting others and not seeing the problem with this. me when the character is a little freak who does weird shit because their beliefs, inspired entirely by their environment, are fuckeddddd
The scene in "The true face" comic where we are shown the confrontation between Mizi and that dogshit npc is so fascinating, and the worldbuilding! Even though Alien Stage's universe doesn't function in the same ways as ours, it is to be expected that some of our world would be reflected in theirs, as long as a society exists. Heteronormativity and misogyny exist in some ways in their world. And it is taught by the aliens, from, Mizi knows and it is reiterated to her that as a female it is expected for her to only find mates in the other gender, not friendship, because it is expected that men and women aren't supposed to mean anything to each other beyond the means of reproducing and "mating", she feigns obliviousness to this when the npc asks her about her about Till, and to note- she is quick to make it clear that he's her friend, because she knows how they're percieved. Her reaction when that sentiment is shut down by the NPC and he begins trying to subtly convince her to acknowledge him too- is repulsion
It's interesting because she's aware of the expectations people have of her, and how she's forced to oblige them or else she won't survive. She's aware of how superficial the world around her is, and it disgusts her, especially in another scene where, in a way, she confronts Till about his feelings for her, even reiterates that she truly only has room in her heart for Sua (I think this ties back to the fact that she's repulsed that man and woman are a strict norm, because she doesn't believe in it and that's such good background info skdjufh) and again, she's repulsed when he tells her he likes her because she's pretty, not because of anything meaningful or because of her as a person, something that shows he sees her like what she's looking for but because of another aspect of the facade and get-up that she hates (This is how she knows a lot of other people see her, so it puts her off when he says the same). It disappoints her, yet she can't express that, she pretends to laugh it off whilst feeling bitter inside. These scenes center on how Mizi has a problem with not feeling like she's seen as a whole person, only the object of someone's desires, only a symbolic figure contributing to something "greater and more significant". Mizi's perspective reflects that of a lot of women in our world in the way that she resents being seen as something instead of someone, a beautiful girl, and not a person, etc.
When the NPC then hits her for her response and lashes out at her, (for context the translated comic is free on Vivinos's patreon) this shift in her personality is just so visceral, while she's trying to gain her bearings, she breaks down, very visceral fear reflected in her demeanor because he sees right through her and she's scared and trying to escape the dangerous and overwhelming situation by feigning obliviousness again, that's how you know it's her defense mechanism with the way she grapples for it in this moment to defend herself, it's not to reveal that she's a manipulator or malicious like the npc is accusing her of being. Because in this moment, Mizi looks genuinely scared and confused, this method is how she adapts and how she's been trying to survive up to this point, how people perceive her equates to her value, and she truly hates it
The comic nailed the uncomfortable reality that women in our world face, reflected through Mizi's perspective. Her identity is traced directly to her appearance, what she is rather than who she is, and she hates it. It conveys the suffering Mizi went through that we didn't see, and what the other characters didn't see either and how exactly that affected her, because the truth is- the people around her may have pitied or envied Mizi or didn't even think anything over her, just saw her as a bubbly and overwhelmingly positive person because that's what she showed others, but nobody understood her, the ignorance they had even put her in danger or left her lonely. That's why it's shown the NPC thought she was "cunning" and "manipulative" for acting the way she did, acting oblivious and stupid while everyone adored her for it. That's what ignorance and the empathy barely anyone had for Mizi, because they thought she had it so good, resulted in .
Even Sua, on her part, didn't truly understand or sympathize so much with Mizi because of the perception she had of her; she sees Mizi in some places and in others she doesn't. She believes Mizi's facade to be real because that's what Mizi showed her. It was easy to fall for it because Sua herself was using Mizi as a balm for her own pain, and that, only seeing Mizi as her unshifting and peaceful paradise that she could forget the entire cruel world with. And as Mizi played into it, that's what also fed into her resentment. Mizi was somebody dear to her, but it's not surprising that Sua resented Mizi for seemingly having it so "easy" in comparison to herself
That's why I really like this scene, the way Mizi responds to the way Sua sounds when she subconsciously expresses this to Mizi, and Mizi then hits her, shows Mizi's pain, having nobody who truly understands her
It's important to highlight that Mizi didn't hit Sua out of ill will, she's scared of what she did after she's done it, she's hurt, and she's trying to hide it because she's relieved to be with Sua, but Sua's words, that same "It must be nice being so lucky and not having any worries at all, yes?" sentiment that directly paralleled what that NPC said to Mizi was a trigger because Mizi was violated and hurt, she's not always treated well, her agency was ignored. Sua may not have known the details, but that ignorance is why Mizi responds that way. When she lives every day with her pain, never being acknowledged and having to act like she isn't bothered, this is a logical, immediate response on Mizi's part, ( or in a more metaphorical sense, to give back the same pain she was given) even if it's obviously not okay, This environment fosters these types of interactions, this is just the reason (not the justification).
It's so interesting how Alien stage explored Mizi's perspective this way, how she's constantly perceived as fortunate in a terrible situation, she inspires adoration and devotion just as much as she is the subject of ridicule and resentment, yet she has to take it and adapt even if it means being the person everyone assumed she was to ensure her survival, again that's how she adapted to this environment and acts the way she acts according to what others already think and expect of her, to survive. The honest truth is that she was trying.
I didn't wanna use high-pitched bc that's way too long for an sfx. So, I did some searching, and I saw it also described as a shrill voice, so I used shrill and loud.
쩌렁쩌렁 (jjeoreongjjeoreong) — Used to describe clinking sounds or a loud and high-pitched (shrill) voice.
"Now, MirrorCatCreditcard," you may say, "that's nonsense. Any human would want freedom from that system."
If you're thinking I'm gonna convince you that Luka doesn't know he wants freedom yet, you're wrong. I'm here to talk about indoctrination/conditioning, grooming/emotional manipulation, my own experience with those topics, and how all of the above connects with Luka as a character. If a deep dive like this is too much for you, please tap out for your own sake.
Luka's life was planned before he even existed. There has never ever been an alternative option. There is no life for Luka as anything but what Herperu chose. Everything in his life has been planned to have him be the perfect pet human idol. That is what he must be.
Fandom, I don't think most of you actually understand this and have dissected what this means (shout-out to the Luka stans who are getting there/have guessed similar things). These words we know have alternatives and are not set in stone are Luka's "gravity makes rain fall to the earth" and "water makes things wet." They are facts so deeply ingrained within him that even if shown the contrary he remarks that the person showing them is just disillusioned.
Take his commentary on Mizi and Hyun-A in the art book. He looks down on Mizi for not being able to control any of her emotions. How does he talk about Hyun-A? He has her at 70% affection yet shows a patronizing attitude—she's the one in denial at reality.
Now, how did we get here? How is a human so "delusional" and set in the control?
He's been conditioned.
Some of you don't know what I mean by this from experience and/or research, and count yourself fortunate that you don't. I pray you never experience such things firsthand. Don't worry about ignorance. Familiar or not, I will explain.
When you are surrounded by only one truth and reality, that is the way you interpret life. If a parent tells a child "the moon goes to sleep during the day," until the child learns otherwise, that's what they believe. Now take that child-like belief and add some toxic environments to the mix. With time, any other kid would learn that the earth rotates from their peers or adults around them. But if the creatures around them all say and believe the same thing "the moon goes to sleep during the day," then that is what the child continues to believe. Years of that same thing being the only truth make that false knowledge into a fact in the person's head, and everything that supports that fact is taken as truth or on the right path to truth.
"This is kinda silly though," you guys are no doubt murmuring, "All of this is a hypothetical. Give us something that makes sense or that someone could actually see happen in our society."
I'll give you my own experience then. My parents taught me that God is real. My parents taught me that I will be damned I do not follow the commandments of the scriptures. I didn't need to worry though. As long as I was obedient to the God who loved me and wanted what was best, I would be saved despite being born an awful sinful human. I was homeschooled, only interacted with people of similar beliefs, and taught that people too different from me in ideology or with radical beliefs against my own were trying to harm me and my family. I believed the people who raised me because why would people who love me lie to me? My task was simple. I needed to obey God and love everyone, especially them. Love meant giving up my entire being and living only as servant and sacrifice. After all, being selfless to the utmost was the greatest form of love.
Let's go back to Luka. His guardian, Herperu, when questioned about any surprises while training Luka, stated not only that he was the one who endured the "tough moments" but also that "(Luka) owes his success to me, and naturally, he should be grateful." This sentiment is echoed by Luka in his interview (shown on Patreon). My god, it's giving parents with disabled kids who brag on social media about how much trouble their kid is and how much they do for them. Sickening. This shows exactly what environment Luka has lived in though.
When you are manipulated into having something as your reality, everything else is fiction and delusion.
Let's review what exactly is Luka's reality.
Heperu is the one suffering if Luka has any difficulties being obedient.
Gratitude is what Herperu is owed because he goes through so much trouble to make Luka a star.
Love/care is shown by owning another's autonomy.
Emotions and bodily reactions exist, sure, but someone should be able to control them; and if they can't, someone should control those reactions for them.
Segyein are superior and the good ones for dealing with humans. Humans must be disciplined and shaped to how an segyein wants it to act to be considered deserving of this goodness.
(Luka)'s perfection is defined by his guardian.
Luka's life is directly connected to being the perfect performer. His guardian praises his abilities with the statement that no other pet human will ever be as perfect as him yet leaves an underlying threat saying that it will be no good if a pet is not trained properly. This has probably been mentally (if not physically) beaten into Luka's mind: his greatness doesn't stop him from being able to be disposed of. The human instinct to want to live has been explained to him as Heperu's wish for him to live and that has been further distorted as a duty to live for the stage he has been placed on.
Luka believes fully that there is a debt in play here. In his interview, he mentions repaying love. He thinks the relationship between fan and idol is completely normal, encouraged, and healthy. Performance is the most important thing. Being where he is is a privilege.
There's a chain here:
Heperu indoctrinated Luka into believing what he says is all true.
The guardian manipulated him easily to do what he wanted with his body and mind.
The years have been spent constantly conditioning Luka to be the god who encapsulated fantasies for the audience.
He is continually being groomed to exist for the entertainment and enjoyment of segyein.
Circle back to my first point of this post. Luka does not want to be freed. He doesn't know what freedom actually is. He sees freedom as either foolish denials of reality (and doesn't consider that actual freedom) or as controlling the song and stage when he performs (something he learned from Hyuna). He cannot want something he cannot understand. He cannot want freedom in the sense the fandom keeps speaking about.
It's funny. From the moment Luka was revealed to be hated by the fandom, I wanted to know why. Instead of digging and finding horrific deeds, I instead found a character who portrayed my own traumas and experiences. I instantly attached and delved deeply into learning about this thirty year old singer. Why does he express himself in a certain way? Where do we first see mention of him? Who does he have emotions towards? How was he trained? What makes Luka himself? I have past essays/replies to other's theories if you're interested, but in this one I got personal and didn't sugarcoat the facts. If the fandom can't handle deep thought, we shouldn't be discussing this incredibly profound and depth-filled web series.
As always, thank you for your time, and I hope my thoughts allowed you to open your mind to new things. Mostly, I hope you enjoyed them 🫶
I haven’t seen anyone else post these here yet, but I thought this thread of alex rochon’s post finale thoughts was really interesting! I’m still forming my thoughts so I’m mulling this over for now
