Some Emily's since I was practicing face angles
Close ups:
Game of Thrones Daily
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@rgyalannah25
Some Emily's since I was practicing face angles
Close ups:
it's my birthday and I'll post me and my wife as Jeckari if I want to!
I forgott this account so roryy meant to redraw my profile in the meanwhile heres what i made on valentines to get an idea of my persona and my wife IL lvodmh wiffe ee gngnhnhnhnhjjjj
Growing up.
ENTRY 407
In doing some light reflecting, my head is a beautiful mess. Between the trauma and the neurodiversity, there's never a dull moment, especially when they inspire childlike curiosities or darker forms of creativity.
It's empathy and hypervigilance that I'm actually thankful for. As exhausting as they can be, they have the surprising potential to bring balance, which someone like me who thinks and feels in extremes badly needs.
Hopefully this doesn't sound self-centered or like conceit. Believe me, I have spent the grand majority of my life hating myself and rejecting compliments. I'd just like to say something decent to myself for once. I really liked this pic and felt I resonated with it, in some sort of way. More thoughts later.
feedback and fic in fandom (3 f's of our own)
This conversation about feedback on fic says everything Iâve been wanting to say better than I could say it. But Iâll go ahead and try anyway.
Over the last five years or so there have been some great discussions around the rise of commodification of fanworks and decline of fandom community. This commodification looks a bit like enshittification of the internet: a cool site exists; its popularity makes someone realize they can get money from it; it has more and more ads; the site adds features to drive engagement, including The Algorithm; the things that made the site cool start to fall away. The site exists now as a vehicle purely to get clicks, and the people on it are on it solely to get clicksâto make money, to be successful, for some kind of social cachet.
AO3 doesnât have advertisements. Itâs not making money. But what is happening to fandom is proof of concept that enshittification changes the way we as humans engage. A cool website in 2004 was often a community space where you could meet people, have conversations, find cool things, and make cool things. A cool website in 2024 is either a content farm that will continually feed you enough content to hold your attention, or a social media site where your participation will come with stats to show you whether you are holding the attention of others.
AO3 wasnât built to be a community space. It doesnât have great functions for meeting people and having conversations. The idea was that, because fandom community spaces already existed, AO3 would serve the part of that community where you can find the cool things and store the cool things you made. It was meant to be a library in a city, not the whole city itself.
But it was also never meant to be a website in 2024, a content farm constantly generating content solely for your clicks and eyeballs and ad revenue, or a social media site where the content creators themselves vie for your clicks and eyeballs.
The most common talking point when people discuss the enshittification of fandom is the folks out there who are treating AO3 as that first kind of enshittified website: the content farm. This discussion is about how people treat fanfic as a product for consumption.
The post that kicked off the discussion on @sitp-recsâs blog was about someone who wasnât getting very many kudos or comments on their fic, and was feeling pretty demoralized about it, then joined a discord server and found an entire channel dedicated to people loving their fic. But those on that server had never come to share that love with the author, which the author found really discouraging.
There are more and more stories like this. Someone on tiktok pulls a quote from a fic on AO3 and makes a 10-second video with them staring at a wall, the quote pasted at the bottom, music playing over it. It has 100,000 hearts, and 100 comments with people gushing over the fic, which has 80 kudos on AO3. Overall, people notice more and more hits on their fics, but fewer and fewer comments or even kudos. Fewer and fewer people seem to feel the need to interact with the author, instead treating the fic like a product to be used and discardedâwhich the enshittified internet (a stunning feature of late-stage capitalism!) encourages. The fandom community is dying, these stories conclude.
I agree. 100%. Both of the stories above have happened to meâviral tiktoks about my fic, secret discord channels to follow and discuss my ficâand let me tell you, it fucking sucks.
But from these observations about fandom enshittification, the discussion continues in a very odd direction. The solution to the death of fandom community is our favorite enshittification buzzword: engagement. We should engage the authors. Theyâre producing these products for free. We consume them at no cost. We must demonstrate our gratitude by paying them back.
Itâs as though the capitalist consumption that the enshittified web encourages is so ingrained within us that we must think in terms of payment, in terms of exchange, transaction. Or as though, by forgoing payment, authors are some kind of martyrs defying capitalism, and the only way to honor their great sacrifice is comments and kudos.
Indeed, the discourse around this sometimes does veer away from capitalist rhetoric into something that smells almost religious in desperation. Authors are gods who bestow us mere mortals with the fruits of their labor benevolently, through love; the least we can do is worship them. Meanwhile the authors adopt the groveling sentiment of starving artists: I produce great art; I only humbly ask that you feed me in return.
These kinds of entreaties make my skin crawl for a number of reasons. Iâm not a god. Iâm not writing because I love you. I donât expect your worship or even your praise.
I think the thing that disturbs me the most about it is that it suggests that authors (or, if the OP is feeling generous fan work creators) are the most important people in fandom. Iâve even seen posts stating that without creators, fandom wouldnât existâas though readers arenât just as important. As though conversations where people discuss characterizations and plot points and randomly spin out interpretations and ideas and thoughts related to canon are meaningless. Iâve even seen people scramble to include folks having these discussions as âcreators,â as though realizing that these people are necessary and integral to fandom communities but unable to drop the idea that the producers are the ones who are important. As though that person who just lurks can never count.
Is this what community is? When you join the queer community, are you expected to produce a product of your queerness? If not, must you actively participate and give back to the queer community in order to be considered a part of it? Or is it enough that you are queer, that you exist as a queer person and want to be around others who are queer, you want to be a part of something? What is community, anyway?
The problem with people raising the authors above everyone else in the community and demanding that tribute be paid is that they are decrying the âcontent farmâ style of 2024 website out of one side of their mouth, but out of the other side are instead demanding that AO3 become a 2024-style social media website. Authors are influencers. âEngagementâ and clicks are the things that really matter. They are in fact suggesting that the way to solve the commodification of fanfic is by âpaying authors backâ with stats.
Before anyone comes at me with the idea that comments arenât just âstats,â I will clarify what I mean. There are literally hundreds of posts on tumblr alone claiming that any comment âhelpsâ the author. Someone replies that they are shy to comment. Someone else replies that incoherent keyboard smashes, a single emoji, or the comment âkudosâ are all that is required to satisfy the author, all that is required as tributeâall that is required as payment to keep this economy healthy.
Iâm not condemning the comments that are keyboard smashes or emojis or a single kind word. I receive them. They make me happy. If anyone wants to leave such a comment on my fics, Iâm really grateful for it. But this is not community-building. This is a transaction. In @yiiiiiiiikes25âs excellent response in the post linked at the beginning, they point out that âyou have a cool hatâ is something that is âperfectly niceâ to hear from someoneâand it is! We all want to be told we have a cool hat! But as they go on to say, what builds community is interactions that are deep and specific, interactions that are rich in quality, not in quantity. A kudos or a comment that says only â€ïžare lovely things to receive, but they donât build community.
My reaction, when I see people begging for kudos and comments as the only means by which to keep fandom community alive, is very close to @eleadore's. I want to say, âNo. Readers do not need to comment or kudos. Believe not these hucksters who claim to know the appropriate method of fandom participation. Participate as you feel able, or not at all; nothing is required of you.â
Iâve been told before (several times) that Iâm not qualified to participate in such discussions because I am an established author who has some fics with very high stats. It doesnât matter that I have also been a new writer with almost no one reading my fics. It doesnât matter that I still write in new fandoms where no one in that fandom knows me. It doesnât matter that I, like any human being, still care about receiving recognition and attention and praise.
And maybe thatâs correct. I personally donât think that billionaires have a place in deciding the direction of the economy, and--if we're really going to consider fandom an economy--in fandom terms, if Iâm not a billionaire, or even a millionaire, Iâm definitely in the infamous âone percent.â So, just as no one wants to hear Elon Musk say âmoney isnât everything,â maybe itâs not my place to say âkudos isnât required, actually.â
That said, Iâm not the only one who has a problem with the stats-based discourse around fandom community. However, the main counter-response to this discussion I see goes something like this: you shouldnât be writing fic for validation. If youâre writing for attention, youâre doing it for the wrong reason. Authors should write fic because they love it without any expectation of return.
This is, in my opinion, missing the point of what is meant by fandom community.
I wrote fanfic before I knew that fanfic, as a concept, existed. I read books; I wanted them to be different; I wrote little stories for myself with new endings, with self-inserts, with cross-overs, with alternate universes. I did it for myself in the 90s. It never occurred to me that anyone else would do this, much less that people would share.
As @faiell points outâcreating and sharing are two different things. I created fics for myself, but I decided to share them in the early 2000s because other people might like them, too. And of course, I wanted to hear whether other people liked them. How could I not? I might decorate my home just for me and not for anyone elseâs preferences, but when people come over and say my house is nice, how can I not enjoy that? And if a lot of people think my house is nice, which encourages me to post pictures of it online, isnât it understandable I might do so with the hope that more people will say my house is nice? And, honestly, if no one is appreciating my pictures, I probably wonât continue to go through the trouble of taking them and posting them. Iâll just enjoy my house that I decorated without sharing, the end.
When I found out there were whole fannish communities where people discussed canon and tossed ideas around about it, made theories and prompts and insights into the characters, fics they had written and recs for other fics and analyses of fics and art based on fics and fics based on artâI wanted to be a part of that, too. Now, sometimes, I write fic not out of an internal need to do so but out of a desire to participate in that community.
The idea that we write fic only for the love of it, then post it only because we possess it, is a process entirely centered on the self. Itâs fandom in a vacuum. The idea that we share this thing, that we feel pleasure if someone likes it but feel nothing at all if no one says anything about it, that itâs completely okay to be ignored and unseenâthatâs not what a community is either. Thatâs some weird sort of self-aggrandizement through self-effacementâbecause yes, there is often a weird kind of virtue-signaling in this kind of discourse.
I say this as someone who has virtue-signaled in that way: âsome people write for stats, but I write for myself.â Itâs bullshit. Sure, I write for myself, but why post it on the internet? Honestly, said virtue has a whiff of the capitalist machine, which would like you to produce for the sake of production, work for the sake of work. The noblest among us expect no recompense for that which they give!
The reason that Iâm bringing this back around to capitalism is that capitalism actively works to dismantle community. The reason that folks are out here pleading for âengagementâ in order to âpay backâ authors for the products they give us âfor freeâ is because people no longer even have the language to discuss how to participate in meaningful community. And frankly, how to build back fandom community, in the face of enshittification, is getting harder and harder to see.
But I do think that if we value fanfic and the fanfic community, itâs really, really not constructive to judge whether someoneâs reasons for writing fanfic are valid. Itâs also weird to me that it would be considered wrong that someoneâs reason for sharing fanfic is because they would like to receive some recognition for it, when in fact that seems to be the most natural reason in the world for sharing something so private and vulnerable with the world.
Letâs go back to that idea of how hurtful it is to find out your fanfic is trending on tiktok without anyone from tiktok saying anything to you about your fic, or how it can be painful to find out thereâs a secret discord channel dedicated to your fic. The people who respond to that with, âAh, but you shouldnât be writing to get attention!â are missing the point. The fic did get attention. It got lots. Attention obviously wasn't why the writer was writing--they were writing to participate, and they didn't get to. At all.
However, if your conclusion is that the author was upset because these particular stats were not accruing under this authorâs profile, thereby preventing them from achieving the vaunted status of BNF and influencerâI donât know, maybe youâre right. But I donât think thatâs why I, personally, have been hurt by these things, and I doubt itâs what hurt the people in these posts either. Theyâre hurt because they want to participate, and they have been systematically excluded by the very people they thought were part of the community they thought they could participate in.
Sure, if those folks from tiktok and the discord server all came and showered the author with kudos and comments that said âkudos,â the author might have felt satisfied enough with the quantity of this recognition that they would continue writing. But in the end, this still does nothing to address the problem of fandom community, in which the deep, meaningful recognition, interactions, and relationships in fandom are getting harder and harder to have and to build, as a result of how people now expect to engage in online spaces.
So, how to address the problem of fandom community? You probably read this long, long post hoping that I had an answer, and for that I must apologize. I donât have solutions. My intent was to be descriptive, rather than prescriptive. I wished to outline the problems that Iâm seeing in what was hopefully a slightly new or at least thought-provoking way, rather than offer solutions.
But, now that Iâm talking about being prescriptive, maybe I can offer one suggestion, which isâmaybe the solution to this isnât about prescribing behavior. I do understand the irony in writing a prescription saying we shouldnât prescribe people, but Iâm going to write it anyway:
Maybe we shouldnât be telling anyone the appropriate reasons for writing fanfic or for sharing it. Maybe we shouldnât be telling readers they need to kudos or need to comment. If weâre going to go pointing fingers, we should be pointing at the institutions of capitalism that have made the internet what it is todayâbut I donât think thatâs going to solve the problem either.
But I do think that describing this problem, understanding what it actually is, not blaming readers for it and not blaming authors for itâI do think that helps. The discussion I linked at the beginning of this post is what I think of as the fandom I miss, the fandom that's now harder and harder to access, the fandom that is dying. That fandom was a social space where people had opinions and disagreed and went back and forth and gazed at their navels and then talked about Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
In the words of @yiiiiiiiikes25, it was a fuckinâ discussion about hats. And weâre hungry for it.
feedback and fic in fandom (3 f's of our own)
This conversation about feedback on fic says everything Iâve been wanting to say better than I could say it. But Iâll go ahead and try anyway.
Over the last five years or so there have been some great discussions around the rise of commodification of fanworks and decline of fandom community. This commodification looks a bit like enshittification of the internet: a cool site exists; its popularity makes someone realize they can get money from it; it has more and more ads; the site adds features to drive engagement, including The Algorithm; the things that made the site cool start to fall away. The site exists now as a vehicle purely to get clicks, and the people on it are on it solely to get clicksâto make money, to be successful, for some kind of social cachet.
AO3 doesnât have advertisements. Itâs not making money. But what is happening to fandom is proof of concept that enshittification changes the way we as humans engage. A cool website in 2004 was often a community space where you could meet people, have conversations, find cool things, and make cool things. A cool website in 2024 is either a content farm that will continually feed you enough content to hold your attention, or a social media site where your participation will come with stats to show you whether you are holding the attention of others.
AO3 wasnât built to be a community space. It doesnât have great functions for meeting people and having conversations. The idea was that, because fandom community spaces already existed, AO3 would serve the part of that community where you can find the cool things and store the cool things you made. It was meant to be a library in a city, not the whole city itself.
But it was also never meant to be a website in 2024, a content farm constantly generating content solely for your clicks and eyeballs and ad revenue, or a social media site where the content creators themselves vie for your clicks and eyeballs.
The most common talking point when people discuss the enshittification of fandom is the folks out there who are treating AO3 as that first kind of enshittified website: the content farm. This discussion is about how people treat fanfic as a product for consumption.
The post that kicked off the discussion on @sitp-recsâs blog was about someone who wasnât getting very many kudos or comments on their fic, and was feeling pretty demoralized about it, then joined a discord server and found an entire channel dedicated to people loving their fic. But those on that server had never come to share that love with the author, which the author found really discouraging.
There are more and more stories like this. Someone on tiktok pulls a quote from a fic on AO3 and makes a 10-second video with them staring at a wall, the quote pasted at the bottom, music playing over it. It has 100,000 hearts, and 100 comments with people gushing over the fic, which has 80 kudos on AO3. Overall, people notice more and more hits on their fics, but fewer and fewer comments or even kudos. Fewer and fewer people seem to feel the need to interact with the author, instead treating the fic like a product to be used and discardedâwhich the enshittified internet (a stunning feature of late-stage capitalism!) encourages. The fandom community is dying, these stories conclude.
I agree. 100%. Both of the stories above have happened to meâviral tiktoks about my fic, secret discord channels to follow and discuss my ficâand let me tell you, it fucking sucks.
But from these observations about fandom enshittification, the discussion continues in a very odd direction. The solution to the death of fandom community is our favorite enshittification buzzword: engagement. We should engage the authors. Theyâre producing these products for free. We consume them at no cost. We must demonstrate our gratitude by paying them back.
Itâs as though the capitalist consumption that the enshittified web encourages is so ingrained within us that we must think in terms of payment, in terms of exchange, transaction. Or as though, by forgoing payment, authors are some kind of martyrs defying capitalism, and the only way to honor their great sacrifice is comments and kudos.
Indeed, the discourse around this sometimes does veer away from capitalist rhetoric into something that smells almost religious in desperation. Authors are gods who bestow us mere mortals with the fruits of their labor benevolently, through love; the least we can do is worship them. Meanwhile the authors adopt the groveling sentiment of starving artists: I produce great art; I only humbly ask that you feed me in return.
These kinds of entreaties make my skin crawl for a number of reasons. Iâm not a god. Iâm not writing because I love you. I donât expect your worship or even your praise.
I think the thing that disturbs me the most about it is that it suggests that authors (or, if the OP is feeling generous fan work creators) are the most important people in fandom. Iâve even seen posts stating that without creators, fandom wouldnât existâas though readers arenât just as important. As though conversations where people discuss characterizations and plot points and randomly spin out interpretations and ideas and thoughts related to canon are meaningless. Iâve even seen people scramble to include folks having these discussions as âcreators,â as though realizing that these people are necessary and integral to fandom communities but unable to drop the idea that the producers are the ones who are important. As though that person who just lurks can never count.
Is this what community is? When you join the queer community, are you expected to produce a product of your queerness? If not, must you actively participate and give back to the queer community in order to be considered a part of it? Or is it enough that you are queer, that you exist as a queer person and want to be around others who are queer, you want to be a part of something? What is community, anyway?
The problem with people raising the authors above everyone else in the community and demanding that tribute be paid is that they are decrying the âcontent farmâ style of 2024 website out of one side of their mouth, but out of the other side are instead demanding that AO3 become a 2024-style social media website. Authors are influencers. âEngagementâ and clicks are the things that really matter. They are in fact suggesting that the way to solve the commodification of fanfic is by âpaying authors backâ with stats.
Before anyone comes at me with the idea that comments arenât just âstats,â I will clarify what I mean. There are literally hundreds of posts on tumblr alone claiming that any comment âhelpsâ the author. Someone replies that they are shy to comment. Someone else replies that incoherent keyboard smashes, a single emoji, or the comment âkudosâ are all that is required to satisfy the author, all that is required as tributeâall that is required as payment to keep this economy healthy.
Iâm not condemning the comments that are keyboard smashes or emojis or a single kind word. I receive them. They make me happy. If anyone wants to leave such a comment on my fics, Iâm really grateful for it. But this is not community-building. This is a transaction. In @yiiiiiiiikes25âs excellent response in the post linked at the beginning, they point out that âyou have a cool hatâ is something that is âperfectly niceâ to hear from someoneâand it is! We all want to be told we have a cool hat! But as they go on to say, what builds community is interactions that are deep and specific, interactions that are rich in quality, not in quantity. A kudos or a comment that says only â€ïžare lovely things to receive, but they donât build community.
My reaction, when I see people begging for kudos and comments as the only means by which to keep fandom community alive, is very close to @eleadore's. I want to say, âNo. Readers do not need to comment or kudos. Believe not these hucksters who claim to know the appropriate method of fandom participation. Participate as you feel able, or not at all; nothing is required of you.â
Iâve been told before (several times) that Iâm not qualified to participate in such discussions because I am an established author who has some fics with very high stats. It doesnât matter that I have also been a new writer with almost no one reading my fics. It doesnât matter that I still write in new fandoms where no one in that fandom knows me. It doesnât matter that I, like any human being, still care about receiving recognition and attention and praise.
And maybe thatâs correct. I personally donât think that billionaires have a place in deciding the direction of the economy, and--if we're really going to consider fandom an economy--in fandom terms, if Iâm not a billionaire, or even a millionaire, Iâm definitely in the infamous âone percent.â So, just as no one wants to hear Elon Musk say âmoney isnât everything,â maybe itâs not my place to say âkudos isnât required, actually.â
That said, Iâm not the only one who has a problem with the stats-based discourse around fandom community. However, the main counter-response to this discussion I see goes something like this: you shouldnât be writing fic for validation. If youâre writing for attention, youâre doing it for the wrong reason. Authors should write fic because they love it without any expectation of return.
This is, in my opinion, missing the point of what is meant by fandom community.
I wrote fanfic before I knew that fanfic, as a concept, existed. I read books; I wanted them to be different; I wrote little stories for myself with new endings, with self-inserts, with cross-overs, with alternate universes. I did it for myself in the 90s. It never occurred to me that anyone else would do this, much less that people would share.
As @faiell points outâcreating and sharing are two different things. I created fics for myself, but I decided to share them in the early 2000s because other people might like them, too. And of course, I wanted to hear whether other people liked them. How could I not? I might decorate my home just for me and not for anyone elseâs preferences, but when people come over and say my house is nice, how can I not enjoy that? And if a lot of people think my house is nice, which encourages me to post pictures of it online, isnât it understandable I might do so with the hope that more people will say my house is nice? And, honestly, if no one is appreciating my pictures, I probably wonât continue to go through the trouble of taking them and posting them. Iâll just enjoy my house that I decorated without sharing, the end.
When I found out there were whole fannish communities where people discussed canon and tossed ideas around about it, made theories and prompts and insights into the characters, fics they had written and recs for other fics and analyses of fics and art based on fics and fics based on artâI wanted to be a part of that, too. Now, sometimes, I write fic not out of an internal need to do so but out of a desire to participate in that community.
The idea that we write fic only for the love of it, then post it only because we possess it, is a process entirely centered on the self. Itâs fandom in a vacuum. The idea that we share this thing, that we feel pleasure if someone likes it but feel nothing at all if no one says anything about it, that itâs completely okay to be ignored and unseenâthatâs not what a community is either. Thatâs some weird sort of self-aggrandizement through self-effacementâbecause yes, there is often a weird kind of virtue-signaling in this kind of discourse.
I say this as someone who has virtue-signaled in that way: âsome people write for stats, but I write for myself.â Itâs bullshit. Sure, I write for myself, but why post it on the internet? Honestly, said virtue has a whiff of the capitalist machine, which would like you to produce for the sake of production, work for the sake of work. The noblest among us expect no recompense for that which they give!
The reason that Iâm bringing this back around to capitalism is that capitalism actively works to dismantle community. The reason that folks are out here pleading for âengagementâ in order to âpay backâ authors for the products they give us âfor freeâ is because people no longer even have the language to discuss how to participate in meaningful community. And frankly, how to build back fandom community, in the face of enshittification, is getting harder and harder to see.
But I do think that if we value fanfic and the fanfic community, itâs really, really not constructive to judge whether someoneâs reasons for writing fanfic are valid. Itâs also weird to me that it would be considered wrong that someoneâs reason for sharing fanfic is because they would like to receive some recognition for it, when in fact that seems to be the most natural reason in the world for sharing something so private and vulnerable with the world.
Letâs go back to that idea of how hurtful it is to find out your fanfic is trending on tiktok without anyone from tiktok saying anything to you about your fic, or how it can be painful to find out thereâs a secret discord channel dedicated to your fic. The people who respond to that with, âAh, but you shouldnât be writing to get attention!â are missing the point. The fic did get attention. It got lots. Attention obviously wasn't why the writer was writing--they were writing to participate, and they didn't get to. At all.
However, if your conclusion is that the author was upset because these particular stats were not accruing under this authorâs profile, thereby preventing them from achieving the vaunted status of BNF and influencerâI donât know, maybe youâre right. But I donât think thatâs why I, personally, have been hurt by these things, and I doubt itâs what hurt the people in these posts either. Theyâre hurt because they want to participate, and they have been systematically excluded by the very people they thought were part of the community they thought they could participate in.
Sure, if those folks from tiktok and the discord server all came and showered the author with kudos and comments that said âkudos,â the author might have felt satisfied enough with the quantity of this recognition that they would continue writing. But in the end, this still does nothing to address the problem of fandom community, in which the deep, meaningful recognition, interactions, and relationships in fandom are getting harder and harder to have and to build, as a result of how people now expect to engage in online spaces.
So, how to address the problem of fandom community? You probably read this long, long post hoping that I had an answer, and for that I must apologize. I donât have solutions. My intent was to be descriptive, rather than prescriptive. I wished to outline the problems that Iâm seeing in what was hopefully a slightly new or at least thought-provoking way, rather than offer solutions.
But, now that Iâm talking about being prescriptive, maybe I can offer one suggestion, which isâmaybe the solution to this isnât about prescribing behavior. I do understand the irony in writing a prescription saying we shouldnât prescribe people, but Iâm going to write it anyway:
Maybe we shouldnât be telling anyone the appropriate reasons for writing fanfic or for sharing it. Maybe we shouldnât be telling readers they need to kudos or need to comment. If weâre going to go pointing fingers, we should be pointing at the institutions of capitalism that have made the internet what it is todayâbut I donât think thatâs going to solve the problem either.
But I do think that describing this problem, understanding what it actually is, not blaming readers for it and not blaming authors for itâI do think that helps. The discussion I linked at the beginning of this post is what I think of as the fandom I miss, the fandom that's now harder and harder to access, the fandom that is dying. That fandom was a social space where people had opinions and disagreed and went back and forth and gazed at their navels and then talked about Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
In the words of @yiiiiiiiikes25, it was a fuckinâ discussion about hats. And weâre hungry for it.
hyperfixation please stay with me long enough to complete the project. hyperfixation do not fade. hyperfixation finish what you started for the love of god
sure what the hell
The Autistic Struggle of Losing a Special Interest
Neurodivergent Lou
Compilation of Mysterious Papyrus Things
Random Strange Facts:
Papyrus is the only character to speak without an asterisk
Papyrusâs dialogue shakes on a consistent basis when no one elseâs does
Papyrus is described as âforgettable,â something only mentioned elsewhere in context with Goner Kid and Gaster
Papyrus seems to be able to see what the player is looking at when he calls them (âTHAT BAG OF DOG FOOD LOOKS FAMILIARâŠâ)
Papyrus seems to know that MTT has eyes before MTT becomes MTT Ex
Papyrus has a total of 2184 lines in the gameâmore than any other character, and almost as much as the narrator of the game, which is at 2418 lines. The next closest character is Undyne, with 1268 total lines.
Similar wording is used to describe Papyrus as it is to describe Gaster. (Itâs rude to talk about someone whoâs listening)
Papyrusâs theme, âNyeh heh heh/Bonetrousle,â is used in all of the trailers of the game
Papyrus and Sans break the 4th wall in the stream greenlight trailer, which shocks Toriel
Papyrus flies/breaks the laws of physics casually and seemingly on a regular basis
Papyrus is one of the few characters that refers to gameplay mechanics (âPRESS [C] ON THE KEYBOARD FOR DATING HUD!â âHOLD UP LONGER TO JUMP HIGHER, JEEZ!â)
Papyrus says himself that he knows nothing about his hands because he always keeps his gloves on.
There is nothing, nothing known about his past before his showing up to Snowdin. By the end of the game and after some research, you can basically know more about Gaster and Sans than you do about Papyrus, despite him having the most dialogue in the game besides the narrator.
Papyrus has such control over his magic in his fight, that he can make his attacks do zero damage because he refuses to kill the human.
You are healed to full HP right before the Papyrus fight, as well as immediately after if you are captured.
Papyrus doesnât seem to realize that Frisk is a kid, despite Frisk wearing a striped shirt, which is a common indicator for childhood in monster society. (is he unfamiliar with common monster culture, for some reason?)
Sans reads Papyrus bed time stories on a regular basis, but Papyrus himself never seems to sleep
The Undertale Q&A that Toby Fox did for Undertaleâs anniversary revolves around Papyrus
His defense raises in the spare phase of his fight, unlike every other monster. He seems to be able to manipulate his own stats.
Relationships:
The two 4th wall breaking characters (Flowey and the Annoying Dog) seem to have a special interest in Papyrus
Annoying Dog:
Steals bone attacks on two separate occasions (Papyrus fight and aborted Genocide hangout, in which the âspecial attackâ is hinted to be Gaster Blasters)
Steals bones in general on two occasions (Under Papyrusâs sink and during the hangout with Undyne)
Eats Papyrusâs lasagna
Snuggles with Papyrus
Flowey:
Says Papyrus started a âFlowey Fan Clubâ
Says Papyrus took a long time to get boring on his repeated runs
Asks Papyrus to call Frisk before the True lab, gather everyone together before the True Ending, and probably leave a note in Alphysâ trash can
Flowey is the only one who knows Papyrusâs favorite food, which is dinosaur oatmeal (no, itâs not spaghetti. Papyrus has never eaten it.)
When Flowey attacks the group during the True Pacifist fight, he binds everyone with two vines, except Papyrusâwho he binds with four.
Sans (overlooking the bounteous brotherly goodness of the two):
Papyrus lies to him on a consistent basis
This is to probably humor Sans about his level of knowledge?
Papyrus still expects Sans to know more about Papyrus than Papyrus does himself?
Papyrus acts negatively towards Sansâs puns, but then turns around and makes the most (and arguably best) puns in the game out of anyone
Personality:
Doesnât outwardly acknowledge criticism
According to Sans, he is trash-talked a lot
May have self-worth issues
Extremely blasé about his own death
Doesnât seem to have friends, despite working very hard to get them
He phrases things in really strange ways. (âUNMANDATE IT SAFERâ)
Papyrus staunchly refuses to really hurt people, despite it being very likely that he could be just as hard or harder of a fight than Sans
He has a strong and unshakeable belief that people can change (does he know this from personal experience?)
He hates Grillbyâs and Hotland
He is an amazing artist
He considers himself a great chef, even if he doesnât necessarily eat what he cooks
Quotes:
âDEADLY SPIKES, PRECARIOUS BRIDGES! TRULY THE PILLARS OF YOUTH!â
[when dying] âALAS, POOR PAPYRUS. [this is quoting Shakespeare while heâs dying] WELL, AT LEAST I HAVE MY HEAD!â
âI WOULD NEVER TAKE A VACATION FOR ANY REASON!â
Undyne: âPapyrus⊠doesnât know how to sleep??â
âI WANT TO MEET DEATH!â
âYOU CAN SEE YOUR REFLECTION IN A PUDDLE, BUT⊠DONâT LET A BODY OF WATER DETERMINE YOUR SELF WORTH!â
âITâS MY LEAST FAVORITE NIGHTMARE!â â referring to Hotland lasers and conveyors
âA MYSTERIOUS SCIENCE HOUSE. [âŠ] LABORADOR-Y?â When talking about Alphysâs lab with Sans present.
âA LAB?? MY BROTHER WOULD LOVE THAT!â âwhen talking about Alphysâs lab without Sans present.
âICE CREAM? THANKS, BUT I LIVE IN SNOWDIN! THEREâS ICE CREAM ALL OVER THE GROUND!â âwhen talking about ice cream when Sans is present.
âI TRIED TO CAPTURE YOU⊠WHEREâS MY ICE CREAM.â âwhen talking about ice cream without Sans present.
âSTOP LOOKING IN MY EMPTY MAIL BOX. THATâS MY EMPTINESS, NOT YOURS.â
âI AM A PRETTY BRUTAL KIND OF GUY.â
âHOTLAND! I KNOW IT LIKE THE BACK OF MY HAND. WHICH, SINCE IâM ALWAYS WEARING GLOVES⊠I DONâT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT!â
âWELL, IF YOU WANT TO GET SOMEONE TO OPEN UP, YOU SHOULD ENGAGE THEM IN COMBAT! HUM HUM HUMâŠâ â before the Shyren encounter. This is one of the few times where Papyrus actually gives you something helpful, but how does he know?
Links for additional reading/theories(most links to @batter-sempai, @papyrus-knows, and @queenofdragons6 posts and reblogs): Optimism does not make Papyrus naive Papyrus casually breaking laws of physics Strange music (or lack of) in Papyrusâs room Brutal kind of guy screenshots Some disturbing connections Some suspicious screenshots Part 3 of a sans theory where the writer realizes Papyrus is ridiculously mysterious Chara and Papyrus similaritiesâtheyâre always smiling! Phone call and 4th wall suspicions Papyrus surprising cynicism Sans and Papyrus dynamic speculation Vague Gaster and Papyrus connection Papyrusâs skewed views on what is safe for kids⊠possible backstory connection? Another compilation of sketchy Papyrus-y things Insomnia and nightmares More on music and rooms Papyrus creeped out by echo flowers Papyrus and Annoying Dog interactions (there are a surprising amount) Sans and Papyrus dynamic speculation 2 Papyrus: treated like a child Papyrus: nasty words with a huge grin The fodder for many an amnesiac theory Papyrus is literally the skeleton in the closet Papyrus battle mechanics and minor Flowey connections The dude is lonely Theory: is Papyrus Gaster? More Papyrus fighting skill plus reality breaking phone call Heâs a gentleman Papyrus doesnât sleep Undertale Q&A/Papyrusâs favorite food ReferenceâHow many lines each character has in the game Debunking Stupid Papyrus 1 â he knows what death is Debunking Stupid Papyrus 2 â the sink height. Strange, but workable Debunking Stupid Papyrus 3 â âsolvingâ the horoscope Debunking Stupid Papyrus 4 â the lab Debunking Stupid Papyrus 5 â pet rock Debunking Stupid Papyrus 6 â spaghetti
Papyrus masterpost! :D
This makes me want to write a sequel for âPavirusâ, oh my gosh.
â When Flowey attacks the group during the True Pacifist fight, he binds everyone with two vines, except Papyrusâwho he binds with four. â
I got fucking chills omg..
Also. I keep forgetting it but:
â Papyrusâs dialogue shakes on a consistent basis when no one elseâs does â
This was one of the things I noticed when I first became suspicious of Papyrus, but I would like to point out that thereâs two other characters who have shaking text like Papyrusâ.
Undyne the Undying.
And Flowey, when he has absorbed the human souls before he turns into photoshop Flowey.
@forgettable-au
Funny that you mentioned me here because I literally reblogged this on my main account like 4 hours ago lol
You know what, Iâm gonna share it around here too, because you all need to know about the weird Papyrus things to understand some of the things Iâm doing with this AU hehe
Spreading the knowledge everywhere, I need more people to be crazy about Papyrus
The Autistic Struggle of Losing a Special Interest
Neurodivergent Lou