im finally starting to become happy with how my legs look omg
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@rheaharrington-new
im finally starting to become happy with how my legs look omg
Get the thought of food out of your head so food will never get to your stomach
at the ed clinic i went to i overhead this one girl saying "when jesus doesnt eat for 40 days its called a miracle but when i do it i get sent to an ed clinic"
TW BODY CHECK
174cm/55kg
i fucking hate having wide hips omg
at the ed clinic i went to i overhead this one girl saying "when jesus doesnt eat for 40 days its called a miracle but when i do it i get sent to an ed clinic"
shit i forgot how much laxatives hurt when they kick in
I am sorry I am sorry I am sorry
sometimes trauma isn't
blank eyes and shaky hands
not being able to look at yourself in the mirror
the days where all you can do is survive
sometimes I hurt so quietly
I forget I am suffering
sometimes it doesn't even burn
when I touch my softness
and sometimes all that is holding me
is myself
I want to apologize
but what do I say ?
"I punished myself enough"
of all the violence in my life
no ones been crueler
than I have been to myself
-aeris
i was randomly recording a tt out in my garbage and i look SO SKINNY???? WHAT THATS ME???
let's play?
ed-things nobody talks about
(some things I experienced when my ed was really bad when I was 16-17. It’s not all fun and it’s not like the cute thinspo-posts you see here everyday)
hiding food in your pockets, shoes, socks… while eating with others
forgetting that you were hiding the food in these places (oh the smell)
friends, family … finding the food you were hiding
trowing away the food someone you loved gave you
making people cry and constantly worry about you
being upset when people give you the bigger portion (do they think you eat that much????)
being upset when people give you the smaller portion (do they think you are fat and that you should eat less????)
drinking to much water before a doctors weight in so you feel like you are peeing your pants
the pain after the laxatives kick in
being afraid to put chapstick on (because you know, it’s made out of fat lol)
not going out with frieds, because there is food everywhere (you will regret it later, because everyone went clubbing and now that you are healthy they are not into that anymore, aka missing out your youth)
freezing when people around you wear a bikini
not being able to get pregnant, although you recovered
heartproblems, although recovered
struggling with hormone-production, although you recovered
having bad teeth, although you recovered
having problems with your bones, although you recovered
having problems with your nails and hair, although recovered
the need to take medication your whole life because of a few years of having an ed
loosing your sexdrive
being afraid to fall asleep and never wake up again
not being able to stop, even if you want to
Edit: If you reblog please don’t use tags like pro ana because this post is clearly not pro and I also don’t want to get deleted once again ♡
i have been scared to come back here since i gained… i was 3lbs away from my UGW, and now
im a whopping 123lbs
my ultimate goal: to be someone’s thinspo
i’m 3lbs away from my UGW omg what
first ever body check, don’t know how well it’ll do, but i need validation so
HELP
ok so i have a doctors appointment on monday (July 5th), and i’m currently at 53.9kg (118lbs).
part of the appointment is a weight-in, and i’m freaking out, i NEED to be atleast 52kg by then.
HOW CAN I LOSE 2KG BEFORE MONDAY?