Parachutes

Welcome to the primary evidence of my existence. This is the my main blog, which houses manifold examples of my humor, my passions, my life, and more. The focus of this blog is going to be more loose and lean towards the humorous side, but if you wish to see my poetry blog, head on over to thedevilsapostle.

[screenshotsofdespair]

[kitkenk]

hey i felt you right click me just now. are you seriously viewing my properties? pervert

[deadgirl10]

set as executable

[deadgirl10]

runs you

[badassdemonsword]

this gif is like... almost biblical. as if hes experiencing a pharaohs curse...

[lucifers-golden-bitch-apparently]

wtf were you gonna say

[redhotarsenic]

Please respect my privacy

[lucifers-golden-bitch-apparently]

my deepest apologies

[redhotarsenic]

I forgive you

[redhotarsenic]

Anyway me when I suck that pharaoh good and hard through his scaramphigousus

[ismenes]

you know those studies showing that cursing helps with pain tolerance or whatever. that’s how i feel about making my weird little noises to get through my basic daily activities. sometimes you just have to go hggblaaaah for a minute so you can find the strength within yourself to get up or wash the dishes or send an email. mmmnneh. urgh. the torments are unending but you can always make some little sounds about it.

[turing-tested]

people who play modded minecraft are truly doing it like no other

[lieutenantcommunist44]

stop talking about yo shaved clean pussy no one gives afuck

[juliesandothings]

advertisement for Casio mini / portable TV’s from the early 1980′s

[saintjasperira-deactivated20250]

demonic possession wouldn’t even affect me, i would just assume it’s The Symptoms

[catilinas]

mike’s hard problem of consciousness

[oak23]

Burden bearing hips

[milquetoaast]

source

[girlballs-archive]

Fat bitches frotting

[girlballs-archive]

sposnored by thee fucking frito lay corporation

[im-mender]

because fat bitches are Fri to Lay down and frot with me

[pansyfemme]

LMAO and Loam have the same letters. coincedence? or is this another shining truth that earth and soil is joyous and plentiful

[berensreverie]

Guardian of the Unicorns

[slimegirlandroid]

tending to my pet anarchists. going into their solarpunk themed enclosure and spreading packaged medicine around in bushes for them to naturally gather. refilling their stock of grain discreetly so they think it all comes from their garden sized wheat field. I spot one and she hisses at me and calls me an authoritarian tankie but i make cooing noises and offer zines as treats and she lets me pet her

[brenatto-apothecary]

if magic was real I'd get really into wizardry long enough to learn like 3 spells then move on and 4 years later id be like oh yeah I remember how to summon flame. probably. and then id do all the hand motions out of order and explode

[ceruleanheaven]

i dont even know where the bit ends and i begin