🌌H🌌

Just posting what I’m feeling at the moment and hoping some of you relate

[rightnowpoems]

Now I get how you can love and hate someone at the same time. And it’s not a pretty fight

[rightnowpoems]

Always remember: in order to have a new beginning, past things have to come to an end. Don’t grieve the past, embrace the future.

[rightnowpoems]

Why do I keep bleeding, even though we’re done?

Why do I keep grieving this wrecked thing that we’ve become?

Why do I keep hurting when I think of your eyes?

Maybe cause the turned so cold when the last thing you did was apologise.

[rightnowpoems]

I like her

We’re friends

We get along just fine

But when she kissed you

she knew

it was you on my mind

[rightnowpoems]

Full Circle

I met your gaze

Then I

Shoved myself past your friend

And asked you your name,

And I

Kept forgetting it that night

But you still held my hair back and

Asked if I was alright

Before I knew

We were

Back at your place and

In your bed

You pulled me closer and

Somehow I felt safe,

And then I gave

With no regret

You and me

In that bed

Strangers then

I still remember everything

You said

Sometimes when I’m in my head

I don’t know if I want you back

And

Sometimes when I’m in my head

I still wonder if you want me back

I met his gaze

Then I pulled him down

To hear me ask

If you were here

And he pointed fast

To where you stood, so close to me

After months of

No replies and

A heart that bleeds

Before I knew

I was crying on your shoulder

And you had told me

That we were over

And before you left

You pulled me closer

With no regret

You broke me

In the place we met

Strangers now

I still remember everything

You said

Sometimes when I’m in my head

I am certain that I want you back

But

Sometime when I’m in my head

I‘m still not sure if you miss me back

Haven’t been to that place

It’s been months, soon years, decades

In which I’ll never

Manage to erase

All you did

All you were

And how you kissed my face

Cause sometimes

When I’m in my head

I wonder if I’d take you back and

Sometimes

When I’m in my head

It still hurts to know

You don’t want me

Back

[rightnowpoems]

It’s so hard to ask for help when you know people are sick of hearing the reasons why you need it.

[rightnowpoems]

Dark Nights

I remember dark nights

Before I met you

Drinking, dancing with strangers, Raging, forcing, forgetting, until my life was bruised in blue

I remember the dark night

When I met you

Laughing, dancing, talking, cuddling, kissing, until the darkness turned to soft hue

I remember dark nights

While I met you

Screaming, crying, blaming, laughing, lying, the light you relit slowly dying

I remember the dark night

The last time I saw you

Empty excuses, confessions, I’m useless, begging and breaking, until you ended taking

The love that I have

For you…

You don’t want it anymore

And you have left me more broken than I was before

[rightnowpoems]

Getting over you is like learning how to ride a bike;

I was shit at it in the beginning,

But I am getting better at it.

Now every once in a while I still fall even after months, even after years.

Sometimes I still fail and remember you, the way we used to be, and just like falling from my bike; it hurts just like the first time.

[rightnowpoems]

Crossed so many of my own boundaries to make you stay. But I just ended up embarrassing myself.

[rightnowpoems]

I still love you and I know that I always will but I don’t miss you anymore and I have accepted that we weren’t meant to be.

I hope you still think of me sometimes

[rightnowpoems]

A part of me will always be with you, even if you can’t feel it.

[rightnowpoems]

It’s been so hard this past year.

Ever since that night, exactly one year ago today, when I first saw you in that club. And I was so wasted that I kept forgetting your name. I bet you don’t ever remember that. I’m also starting to forget little details that I used to remember about our time together. It’s a little over five months now that we’re over, really over, but I am finally okay.

But even now I know that I will think of you during this next year when it’s the days that we spent together.

[rightnowpoems]

It’s the way I was out last night, in the same club we first and last saw each other. And I spotted someone across the room, only because he reminded me of you. Couldn’t tear my eyes away and he wove me over. Had a sliver of hope that it was you but when I came close my heart dropped and when he talked to me my head was screaming that he wasn’t you. But my heart was heavy with hope when he took me dancing and he stood behind me and I dared to imagine you in his place. Until I turned around. A face so familiar, yet so strange. Maybe you were right when you said that I had to change.

[rightnowpoems]

And I’m starting to forget the little details I used to remember about our time together and knowing that hurts like you‘re ripping out my heart all over again

[rightnowpoems]

And in my head, when I think of you, you‘re always my boyfriend. Even though you never were

[rightnowpoems]

I just want to talk to you one more time. But I’m not even worth that to you

[rightnowpoems]

You literally told me who you were in the beginning. And you made sure I believed you in the end