I’m a bundle of suppressed instincts held together with spit and coffee.
Me too, Mal.
noise dept.
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The Stonewall Inn
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@riteofashkente
I’m a bundle of suppressed instincts held together with spit and coffee.
Me too, Mal.
at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you
at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.
at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly
at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.
at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.
At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.
we fucking knew it. vindication. also phil babe what happened to the flash drive...
Just watched Adam Conover (of Adam Ruins Everything) make such a solid point that I think we should spread far and wide. Yes, having AI write your emails is lazy, sure, but people love being lazy. We need to really emphasize that sending AI emails (or using AI responses on social media, or publishing AI flyers, or or or) is rude.
It's rude. You're making someone take their time to read something you couldn't bother to write. You're telling them they were so unimportant you couldn't be bothered to actually take the time to say something yourself. And frankly, you're lying about it while you're at it.
It's rude.
The above is doubly true if the content of the email is something that will be important to the person receiving - especially something that affects them negatively. They see that this thing that affected them so much didn't matter enough to you to write it yourself. I was a bystander to such a thing not long ago and it was just awful.
STARS. THE FINAL EXPLORE-Y PLACE. THESE ARE THE TRIP THINGS OF THE SPACEBOAT ENTERPIPES. ITS FIVE YEAR JOB THINGY: TO HANG OUT IN STRANGE NEW PLACES, TO HAVE DINNER WITH ALIENS AND SHIT, TO VAGUELY WANDER IN THAT DIRECTION LIKE NO ONE HAS DONE BEFORE.
to vaguely wander in that direction
Hindame Eesti (toidu)brändide maskotte sest mul on igav 👍
1) Kalevi Nurr
Pole kõige hullem mis ma näinud olen. Nurril pole vist kunagi korralikku brändi-nägu olnud. Siiski oleks tahtnud rohkem kassi moodi kassi, sest ta meenutab mulle rohkem elustatud Airpodi. Väidetavalt on tema süüdi Kalevi oranžis kuues. Teeb nunnusid nägusid vahepeal. Kiizu :)
Hinnang: 6/10
2) Mesikäpp
Mul on isiklik biif temaga, kuna ta alateadlikult arendab lastele toitumishäireid. Karu, kellel on ortoreksia; mistõttu näeb ta rohkem välja nagu veider hiir. 3D mudelid on kohati hirmsad. Tahan suurt pruuni rõõmsat mõmmit tagasi :(. Võibolla tuleks talle trükipressi alt läbi käimine kasuks.
Hinnang: 1/10 tema kuritegude eest.
3) Draakon. Drako?
Käinud läbi mitmeid disaine, kõik on üsnagi armasad. Isegi peale trükipressialt läbi käimist on tal mingisugune võlu olemas. Üks armsamaid. Sobib närimiskommi maskotiks kuna näeb ise näritav välja. :) Mulle algul ei meeldinud see 3d draakon aga nüüd ma tahaks teda tagasi. Nime muutust ei oska kommenteerida.
Hinnang: 7/10.
4) Anneke
Anneke kasvas vahepeal suureks ja käis samuti trükipressi alt läbi. Nüüd käib ta jõulude ajal Balil ja müüb sõbrannadele Amway ja Oriflame'i püramiidiskeeme. Igav täiskasvanu. Väiksest Annekesest sai Investor Anne või misiganes Nublu ütles.
Hinnang: 3/10.
5) Limpa
Kellele siis Limpa ei meeldi? Püsinud üsna muutumatuna oma terve eluaja. Pidas ajale vastu ja loodetavasti peab ka edasi. Marketing tiim on teinud korraliku töö temaga. Sümpatiseerib mulle ja paljudele. Nina meenutab toru, mis on võibolla vihje pudelile. Kollane siga :)
Hinnang: 9/10. -1 punkt sest maskott on kohati veitsa hirmus
6) Jänks
Hullude silmadega jänest imiteeriv olend. Palun ärge teda kunagi muutke. Ta on suurepärane nii kuidas ta on.
Hinnang: 10/10
7) Tere kohukese kiisu
Konkreetselt ei tea kas tal ka nimi on, aga ta on ülimalt armas. Huvitav kas on keegi, kellele see pakend ei meeldi? Suurepärane. Ei iialgi varem tehtud. Fantastiline. Jne jne
Hinnang: 100000/10
8) Selveri tibu. Ei ole küll otsene toidumaskott aga ta läheb siia alla.
Karvane. Algselt AI-genereeritud. Miks ta karvane on. Järjekordne päris lindu imiteeriv olend. Nad tapsid ära ikoonilise tibu ja tõid tema asemele. Kas sellist Eestit me tahtsime? Kõik eelarvamused ja vanad tibud kõrvale jätta: lips on nunnu, saapad on nunnud. Jätkuvalt ei saa aru miks ta karvane on ja miks tal kahte eri tekstuuri kasukas on. Silmad on natukene hirmsad. Muidu pole väga viga. Vist. Vahepeal panevad nad talle nunnud riided selga.
Hinnang: 4/10
9) Maxima ????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Hinnang: ???/10
they need to invent a digestive system that behaves predictably and correctly
exactlyyyyy
Albert Square, Manchester (1910) by Adolphe Valette | Contemporary Art (2015) by Emily Allchurch
the top is an original, from 1910, the bottom is a new version painted in 2015
THE BOTTOM IS A PAINTING????
also does a really good job reminding the view just how much air quality has improved since we stopped burning coal in every building lol
the bottom one isn't a painting, it's a digital collage of photographs in a lightbox
from her website:
Allchurch uses photography and digital collage to reconstruct Old Master paintings and prints to create contemporary narratives. Her starting point is an intensive encounter with a city or place, to absorb an impression and gather a huge image library. From this resource, hundreds of photographs are selected and meticulously spliced together to create a seamless new ‘fictional’ space.
also the name of her piece is 'Albert Square, Manchester (after Valette)'
i've seen the original in manchester art gallery and spent enough time looking at it to remember that it definitely wasn't a painting, the lightbox really makes it stand out
I might have overdone it on caffeine tonight. Maybe. Just a smidge.
i cant
like. for YEARS we have been hearing that phil is a tactile person & that he misses dan when he doesnt see him for 10 hours & that he loves cuddles & that he went insane when dan went on tour but truly. nothing ever has prepared me for phil to just go like "im never drinking again bc i want you to sleep next to me"
He should tape his mouth shut
phil's ex: yeah i watched your podcast and i think your boyfriend has really bad jealousy issues btw you should probably address those
phil, who's exactly where he wants to be with said jealous boyfriend: