taylor price
Show & Tell
shark vs the universe
Monterey Bay Aquarium
PR's Tumblrdome
★
Origami Around
sheepfilms
Misplaced Lens Cap
No title available
Product Placement
pixel skylines
h
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
No title available
titsay
almost home
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Sweet Seals For You, Always
DEAR READER
seen from Germany
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@rockpopsoda
Coming Soon
rndmbrain.wordpress.com
Stuff from the main blog, rndmreblog and rockpopsoda. Downloading all the archives right now. Finally, an excuse to regularly post again!
I have some things I wanna say about the imminent “death” or Tumblr…
But I forget what they are…
I have it written down at home somewhere.
POWAAAAAAAAH
Happy New year 1985
In the future, shoes will tie themselves, there’s hovermobiles everywhere, and Bill Cosby is President. But you gotta have powah. Also Coke is Pepsi and Pizza Hut comes in a foil package. They’re also now called wishpizzas, because you unwrap the Pizza Hut package and then you wish you had some pizza BOW BOW BOW
JK none of that happens at all and actually it turns out Bill Cosby is a serial rapist. Watch Roseanne instead.
UPDATE: Whoao sorry don't watch Roseanne either cause she's a horrible racist and so is Kelsey Grammar probably. Just don't watch any TV at all, or read books and movies and music and the internet. Just sit and stare at the wall quietly and wait for death.
Call the POP HOTLINE now to hear up-to-the-minute news and rumors about the RETURN of forgotten 90's soda Rock Pop!
Reblogging here because this is a fine representation of my blog's status
Teenagers From Outer Space (1959)
Reblog cause this looks like the logo to Rock Pop soda.
George Kennedy
RIP George Kennedy. He will always and forever be remembered for The Naked Gun and his multiple commercials for BreathAsure, the internal breath-freshener. Men and women much older than me who like to go to PBS oldies revues and vote for Donald Trump will remember him for much more than that. The following is an old bit I wrote that I pass along again in tribute:
BreathAsure. Garlic and onions. “I eat whatever I want because I take BreathAsure!” Garlic and onions. Close-up B-roll of people eating food loaded with garlic and onions. Stinky feet. Lumpy middle aged bodies. Tired baggy eyes.
On a sparse set lit like a cross between an interrogation room and the Check It Out! set, George Kennedy sits on a stack of apple boxes and takes his shoes and socks off. He takes out pizza loaded with garlic and onions. George noisily consumes the pizza. Close ups of George’s stinky feet. George Kennedy loudly belches. Couple of buttons pop off his shirt. George really sweaty. He has a massive heart attack and collapses on ground. Blood pouring out of his mouth and nose. Leslie Nielsen didn’t even die half this undignified.
O.J. Simpson is the last Naked Gun cast member alive. Ricardo Montalban, Robert Goulet and Anna Nicole Smith along with George and Leslie Nielsen are dead. The whereabouts of Fred Ward are unknown at this time. Garlic and onions.
George Kennedy once did a commercial for BreathAsure where he went undercover as a cool teenager to get the kids to think about their bad breath and take BreathAsure. His stinking feet gave him away. After the age of 35, men’s feet begin to stink more and more with each passing year, along with the middle-age bloating and paunchiness. George, despite his claims that pizza was awesome, was not able to steer the conversation over to bad breath, and he was beaten to within an inch of his life by the strong youthful teens and jettisoned from their cool hangout. Let this be a lesson to all old people who can’t digest their garlic and onions without smelling like a decomposing corpse. Youth, young, fresh and new. Step aside for the new generation, you’ve had your turn. And you blew it. So-ree!
The Spice
He who controls the Spice controls the universe.
The Spice, also know as Melange, is now available in an exquisite gift set at your local Homegoods.
Homegoods. Bring your kids. They’ll break stuff because they’re bored and you’ll have to pay for it.
We now return to Judge Jip Johnson! Jip Johnson was a former NASCAR pit crew chief who was well known by his peers for being a loud racist judgmental asshole and so they gave him his own court show with him as the judge because old rotten ladies love watching complete and total shit like this and going to Homegoods with their grandchildren to hoard up on bric-a-brac like ceramic cookie jars shaped like mushrooms and country houses for hours and hours. Meanwhile the grandkids have to entertain themselves with deeply discounted cookbooks and biographies of dull white people like Jip Johnson, and end up stealing a bunch of stale candy on the way out.
Jip Johnson died today at the age of 72 of a massive stroke at his home in Glendale, AZ. He leaves behind his twelfth wife, 25-year-old Candy Westing and his grown children, 45-year-old Biff and 39-year-old Chick, both owners of Jip Johnson Car Washes. His remains are to be squished and juiced into a serum that will be injected into the boils of the Baron Harkonnen.
This is the menu screen for a portable DVD player manufactured in 2016. It looks straight out of 1986.
President McStuffins
Hillary is a crook, Trump is a dope and Bernie looks like he’d die in office. I don’t care about any of these people. We need a President we can believe in, a President that can fix all our boo-boos and make us better. Doc McStuffins is my choice for the next President of these United States. She’s a woman of color, a brilliant doctor and friend to all toys worldwide.
Well I guess we know now who the brains of this outfit is! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
Three more days until Xmas Day
Everybody!
NO NEW SHOWS! NO NEW SHOWS! NO NEW SHOWS! NO NEW SHOWS! NO NEW SHOWS! NO NEW SHOWS! Only remakes and reboots and reimaginings and nostalgia and karaoke and Joseph Gordon Lovitz dressed as Bobby Brown complete with comically large Gumby hairstyle lipstinking "Im Too Sexy" with guest stars Right Said Fred while Jimmies Fallon and Corden jump up and down like schoolchildren. Meanwhile, another mass shooting! In an arboretum! Why not? That'll learn people to go outside and have fun! Stay at home where its safe and watch the NEW Rugrats! Reptar! Thanks, Trump!
(pictured) Bryan Addamms singing his best hit “Summer of ‘69 (When I Shit My Pants)” in Monaco while shitting his pants onstage, a fan favorite highlight of his concerts.
Summer of ‘69 (When I Shit My Pants)
I got my first real six-string Whoah, at the five-and-dime Played it til my fingers bled Was the summer when I shit my pants
Me and some guys from school We had a band and we tried real hard Jimmy quit, Jody got married Shoulda known I shouldnta shit my pants
Oh, when I look back then The shit, it seemed to last forever And if I had a choice Yeah, I’d always wanna never shit them Those were the shittiest days of my life
Oh yeah Back in the summer when I shit my pants WHOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAHHHHHH
That was “Summer of ’69 (When I Shit My Pants)” by Bryan Adamms with an extra ‘m’ because of legal reasons. You might have heard of his last single ‘Somebody’ which was the hit commercial jingle for the Big Wang’s Sports Bar in Hollywood, CA. Look out for his upcoming new single “18 ‘Til I Die”, which is all about his favorite movie “18 Again” starring comedy legend George Burns and the guy who played Ferris Bueller in the shitty TV series based on the movie, I think his name was Charlie Schlatter? Charlie Schueler? Charlie Shitter? Yes, I think that was the one, Charlie Shitty.
"I'm shocked that my ear is splitting open by itself." Also, Nicholas Cage is worth about 39 cents. But he's a millionaire in coupon savings.
