A Garden Of Words

Welcome to my garden of rambles | She/her | 26

[roots-run-deep]

Welcome To The Garden That I Call My Mind

With my mind not allowing me sleep. I have decided to reuse this old side blog for obsessive love letters.

I'm keeping the old writings on this blog, just to show how far I've gone in writing. Hopefully I've improved. I'd love to receive writing requests and I'll try my best to put your feelings into words. Though I must admit sometimes all I want to do is smash the keys on my keyboard.

Extra stuff about the blog owner below ~! Thank you in advance for reading <3

Nickname: Fern 🌿 Age 26 Hobbies: reading. writing, streaming, naps, gaming, watching anime Pronouns: She/Her/Plant Hi hi ~! Friendly reminder that these writings are not about anyone in particular. Though I do love writing x reader. It's cute watching people get flustered. Please do feel free to ask me about anything. I'm quite awkward but I'll try to respond as best/fast as I can :D

[roots-run-deep]

The more you love someone, the more pain you’ll feel.

I didn’t truly understand this until things were falling apart. I thought you were perfect. I thought you loved me. Losing you felt like losing the warmth of the sun. The colours of the world. You told me love is unconditional but there are always hidden little exceptions.

I was too much. I wanted too much attention. I was controlling, unruly, and demanding.

I was afraid.

All this happens because I felt like I was losing you. You were hanging out with others more. Bailed on me when we made plans. Left me alone during holidays and when I was struggling.

Of course I attempted to dig my claws into you. You’re a part of me. I’m rooted and intertwined with you in ways I can’t even comprehend. Then you tore those roots. Freed yourself.

Yet, here I am willing to go through all that again, if it’ll mean you’ll look at me again.

[roots-run-deep]

It’s been said before and I’ll say it again. I love you so much that I forgot what hating myself felt like. 

Just watching you live your life carefree. Hearing the way your voice echoes through the air. Just being around you makes me fall in love with being alive again.

When times are tough, I picture your face and suddenly everything feels alright. You exist. I have the honour of being around you and I just get filled with a sense of calm. Thank you for existing.

[roots-run-deep]

*While scrolling upon your dash a note flutters calls out for your attention* 

Hello lovely ~! This is just a friendly reminder for your beautiful self.

I simply just wanted to mention how utterly adorable you can be. There are times where I can’t seem to tear my gaze away from you, you know. Watching you focus on your hobbies. The way your fingers wrap around jewelry pliers, turn the pages of a book, your eyes dilated as you game the night away. It’s all quite charming.

Watching you like this almost makes me wanna approach you and get a better look. Though I would hate to disturb you. I wonder if you’d ever look at me that way.

Anywho! 

To keep things short. I just wanted to say I can find myself falling for you and I wouldn’t be surprised if others did too. You’ll catch me when that happens, won’t you ?  

[aloyhh]

"omg you remembered!" of course i did. I have a file on you

[roots-run-deep]

[roots-run-deep]

If whatever reason the photo doesn’t load. Here’s what it says:

Poem below the cut.

Unexpected Emotions

I always thought that love took time But then your gaze met mine

Next thing I knew, I was smiling

With a fluttering heartbeat, And blushing cheeks

Thank you for coming into my life

[roots-run-deep]

[roots-run-deep]

Loneliness can come in many different forms. From late night laying in beds with your thoughts. To a crowed street with no one to talk to. It's even possible to feel alone while with friends! My personal fear if I were to be honest. 

 I don't fancy the thought of being lonely. Yet here I am always alone. Being accused of something I don't feel. Do they possibly see something I don't? Or are they simply projecting. That's something I'll never understand. 

Though I can't help but be kinda glad to not understand. Learning about how others feel is interesting! 

If i can help carry their burden. That's even better.  I guess at the end of the day. I'm not lonely.   I have books, words, music. Every little thing around me keeps me company. I simply hope I can do the same for others.

[roots-run-deep]

If whatever reason the photo doesn’t load. Here’s what it says:

Poem below the cut.

(Fun fact this was inspired by the anime Hyouka)

At school we’re equals Just two students in the same class

Same work, different ethics Same subjects, different futures

Two hearts in love But such different paths

You’re of a higher class A family with a deep history

I’m nothing but a freelancer Always watching people come and go

I want to stay by your side But faith has other plans

So, while time still allows it Please let me cherish these moments with you

[roots-run-deep]

If whatever reason the photo doesn’t load. Here’s what it says:

Poem below the cut.

Intimacy

Is the comfort you feel with someone when it’s quiet

It’s the laughter you share with that one special look

It’s the warmth you feel while talking But it can also be the freezing cold after a fight

It’s more than sensual touches and honeyed words It’s more like the childish insults and soft touches

That fleeting touch as if you believe they’d disappear if you hold on too tight That feeling where the person is just too perfect to be real

It’s the dream you don’t want to end  

[roots-run-deep]

If whatever reason the photo doesn’t load. Here’s what it says:

Poem below the cut.

What If

What if, Space was like the ocean and it had creatures swimming freely?

What if, Whales could soar through the skies like birds?

What if, Ant hills look like our neighbourhoods? 

What if, Everything in life was different?

[roots-run-deep]

Welcome to my humble garden.

Here I’ll try my best to post one poem a day ~!

Each piece is one I wrote myself. I hope you enjoy what I share.

Please take care ~!

Love Fern 🌿

Disclaimer!! 

This was written when I was in a pretty bad headspace. I’m doing much better now and that’s why some posts are tagged with Edgy. Being a part of my past. I still want to share it due to it being a part of my growth as a writer. May we cringe together <3