I was wondering if you knew of any fics where Aziraphale or Crowley are overcoming intimacy issues, like if only has had negative experiences before and now they're re-learning how sex can feel good with another person.
Hi! You will find soft, milder fics along these line on our #insecure aziraphale, #insecure crowley, and #body worship tags. I've gone for longer, heavier fics with more angst and rape recovery here. So mind the tags and warnings!!...
Long Is The Way And Hard, That Out of Hell Leads Up To The Light by MiladyDisdain (E)
It had been three weeks, four days, seven hours, and forty-two minutes since he’d last heard from Crowley, and he’d long since given in to panic.
They’d thought they were safe after the Apocalypse that wasn’t, and their subsequent tricking of their respective home offices. They'd settled into a routine, and were looking towards the future.
Then Crowley was taken.
When he makes it back, horrifically tortured and barely alive, it is up to Aziraphale to heal him, and to repay those responsible in kind.
Please mind the tags, my darlings, they are there for a reason
Collateral Damage by EdosianOrchids901 (E)
In revenge for the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, Hell decides to torture a group of angels. When Aziraphale is captured, Crawley is faced with an impossible choice. Will their growing friendship be able to survive?
The Ritual of Propagation by Aethelflaed (E)
When the War in Heaven took its toll, decimating the Legions of Heaven, there was only one way to rebuild their numbers: The Ritual of Propagation.
To Aziraphale, it was simply a duty, a task the Archangels asked him to perform countless times.
But, an eternity later, Crowley sees something far darker and more sinister in the angel's stories.
Can Crowley help his husband acknowledge the abuse he suffered? And can they find away through the pain and trauma to start the family they both desire?
heaven is a place on earth with you by fluffy_miracle (E)
Aziraphale is a deeply religious man with strong convictions against slavery. However, he is also a lawyer for a firm who has been hired by the largest slave corporation in the world. His boss offers him an ultimatum along with a great deal of money and physical violence-- buy a slave or become one himself. Aziraphale bends the proverbial knee and looks through the shops but doesn't find what he's looking for. A chance encounter on a walk home from work offers him the way out. He could rescue the man in the alley and take him in. And once the case is done, he'll free him.
Crowley doesn't know what to expect when a stranger tries to befriend him in the alley he had been dumped in to die. It's most definitely a trick and a trap all in one but it's either this weird man who wants to feed and clothe him in exchange for owning him or to die here. And for all the life he's lived so far, Crowley doesn't want to die. He takes the chance and lets Aziraphale take him in, changing the course of their lives forever. And not just their lives, but the lives of those around them.
seeing you carry plants in by ChristopherTuring (E)
Crowley thinks about lying alone and in pain on a hospital bed when he was 5. He thinks about all those tearful prayers asking for an angel to help him, guide him, take care of him, protect him, and love him. He thinks about every single heartbreak and trauma he had endured for the past decade and a half and how they slowly ate away his confidence and dignity. He thinks about all the time he spent staring down from his window and wondering whether it would have been easier if he just took the leap. But now, with Aziraphale’s arms tightly around him, he has never been surer that he would gladly endure everything again and some more if it meant that Aziraphale would find him in the end. He wants to go back in time and tell that scared 5-year-old that an angel will find him someday. An angel in the form of a soft gentleman with the bluest eyes. He just needs to be patient and strong with just the right amount of stubbornness to not give up before then.
OR
5 Times Crowley thought he was shattered beyond repair and 1 Time Aziraphale proves him wrong.
What Is Owed, and What Is Given by KitCat_Italica (E) (Series)
A month after Armageddon, Crowley is captured by Hell, and tortured physically/sexually/psychologically for four years before Aziraphale can rescue him.
Our story takes place two years later. This is the story of how they recover.
So far I don't think any of these need to be read in order. They all work pretty well as stand-alones imo. We've got plenty of Big Angst and Big Soft on offer here, I hope you enjoy!