Magic Step

Too old and too antisocial media to know what I’m doing. Expect nothing from me and you won’t be disappointed

[what-even-is-thiss]

I still find it pretty funny that in fallout 3 you can get your karma down by just opening Moriarty’s terminal over and over again.

The slavers at paradise falls have heard of me. I’m the guy that opens people’s computers over and over again without asking first.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Butch won’t be my companion. He’s like you’re too intense. You must’ve turned on that computer like 50 times in a row last time.

[what-even-is-thiss]

My forbidden computer touching ways have caught up with me.

[what-even-is-thiss]

The reason I’m doing this in the first place is that a lot of evil karma options in fallout 3 are just inconvenient. Like I could go out of my way to blow up a city or I could not blow up a city and get a much more convenient free house and keep access to their merchants.

So in order to keep getting the full evil karma experience, every time I do something convenient or utilitarian that raises my karma I go back to Moriarty’s Saloon and just open his terminal over and over again.

Thus, my good boy points are eliminated through repeated computer touching and the regulators here are hunting me down for looking at Moriarty’s personal data a hundred times in a row.

[what-even-is-thiss]

What’s really funny about lowering your karma this way is that after you do a major good Karma action and listen to the radio, the radio DJ Three Dog will be like this horrible fucker from vault 101 we all hate him so much you know that guy? He did another fucking thing. He saved a thousand orphans.

[wherelibertydwells]

[cdarklock]

Now show me countries ranked by children shot in schools

[siryouarebeingmocked]

You mean that thing that's much less likely to happen to kids in America than dying in a car accident, unless you cherry-pick the numbers?

Much like anti-gun folks only compare the US to "developed countries" for no explained reason?

[cdarklock]

You're welcome to show me both. Show me the number of children shot in schools, and the number of children killed in car accidents. By country. Note the lack of the word "developed" -- I don't mean SOME countries, I mean ALL countries. Rank them all. There are only like two hundred or so.

But you won't do that, because we have too many cars in America, too. And they're too big, so more of our auto accidents involve fatalities. And your ranking by country is not gonna make you look good, so you're gonna shuck and jive and try to change the subject again.

You don't want to admit America is deeply in love with violence and kills far too many of its people because death is cool. Because you're afraid we'll take away your guns and your ginormous fuck-off SUV and people will notice how small your dick is

[siryouarebeingmocked]

>You're welcome to show me both.

You seem confused. OP showed evidence, you didn't. Now it's your turn to show evidence for your claim.

>. Show me the number of children shot in schools, and the number of children killed in car accidents. By country

No.

My point was that people exaggerate the chance of school shootings, when there's other, more important important causes of unnatural child deaths.

Of course, OP was specifically talking about overall homicide rate, so trying to reframe to school shootings was itself cherry-picking.

>But you won't do that, because we have too many cars in America, too.

Who's "we"? I live in the UK.

Where there's still more road traffic deaths than homicides and terrorism combined.

I'm also from one of those nations to the right of America on the second chart. Heavy gun control did not save the people I knew who were murdered with guns.

>You don't want to admit America is deeply in love with violence and kills far too many of its people because death is cool.

Most gun homicides are by illegal owners. Pro-gun legal owners generally say "we should let people have guns, so they can deter, scare off, and defend themselves from bad guys with guns and other deadly weapons".

They are very big on deterrence. Hence the stereotypical

lawn sign.

>Because you're afraid we'll take away your guns and your ginormous fuck-off SUV and people will notice how small your dick is

I don't live in America, don't want to own guns, probably can't in the UK for some reason, don't want to own an SUV, and it's above average, actually.

Though it's kind of hilarious to see someone pretending they're the mature and responsible one by unironically going;

Why should anyone pro-gun trust you when you can't even act reasonable to someone you think is one even for a few paragraphs?

[brosef-von-dudehomie]

So they have a fucking checklist they go down while making these ignorant arguments? Because they obviously don't know any facts themselves. It seriously looks like an automated list, up to and including "your dick small" when they've clearly lost.

[russianbluewitch]

This was a joke I made on my computer in microsoft paint to send to @real-south-park-confessions but was told it was not funny enough to be worth their time.

I suspect that sans context it's even less funny than before.

But what is tumblr if not a garbage bin for random jokes

[russianbluewitch]

The true reason that dining rooms should be uncarpeted is so that when your tabletop roleplay group inevitably rolls their dice off said tabletop, they will still land flat.

[russianbluewitch]

Me: woohoo! I’m going to the Philippines today!

Mom: don’t forget to pack toiletries

Dad: or forget to pack chargers

Sister: and don’t forget your DS

Alarm clock: and don’t forget that it’s time to wake up and this was just a dream and you’re not going anywhere except to work

[sassyminnesotan]

Any pre-smartphone futuristic media that predicted people having little personal pocket computer devices got thing wrong: not one of them predicted how easy it to loose track of that fucking thing. It’s like the unholy combination of loosing your keys and loosing your writing utensil: you JUST had it a second ago, you carry it all the time, you can’t remember where you set it down, apparently you didn’t put it in your pocket this time, where the FUCK could it have possibly gone

[sassyminnesotan]

AND! It has a built in audible alert signal!! In fact that was its initial purpose!! It would be like if your missing keys had a “make noise on demand” function!! AND YET. AND YET WE, IN OUR HUBRIS, HAVE CONTRIVED TO REMOVE ITS “MAKE NOISE“ FUNCTION. Ringer on silent? Fucked! Out of battery? Fucked! Don’t have a landline? Also fucked!!

[sassyminnesotan]

It was under a blanket on the couch.

[sassyminnesotan]

How dare you accurately call me out on my own post

[thelegendofsqam]

Temptation, all I ever wanted

Temptation have to get away!

Temptation trying to keep me from God

[oatlve]

they're everything 2 me

[spiribia]

i definitely think minecraft won't be the game for everyone in the end and that's just how things are no problem but i do think *some* people who don't get the hype of it just need to play with their friends and build a house with them. its also for doing things like this.

[ageblue-aka-varnah-g]

.

whatever i guess nobody've read that so imma just drop the screenshots

[ageblue-aka-varnah-g]

Tags are in.

[darnitjack]

OP please tell me your in game name is Daedelus

[evilwizard]

Dude. DUDE. HUMPTY DUMPTY JUST FELL. YOU NEED TO SEE THIS ALL THE KINGS MEN ARE THERE TRYING TO GET HIM BACK TOGETHER. THIS IS SO FUCKED DUDE. IM SO SCARED. HE'S DEAD

🖐️ stand aside. only the court necromancer can save him now. we must pray his body isn’t too broken…

[evilwizard]

WTF are the horses doing

[horse-is-a-horse-of-course]

i don't fucking know i tried my best but i think we made it worse with our big hooves

[evilwizard]

WHY WERE YOU INVOLVED AT ALL ??

[horse-is-a-horse-of-course]

i don't knowwww *kicks in frustration and hits humpty dumpty again* fuckkkkkkk

[evilwizard]

STOP

[russianbluewitch]

The swings my grandfather built for me and my sisters, the ones that had to come down when the branches they were fastened to were weakened by weather, will be restored in the New Earth.

And there will finally be a third swing so we will never have to take turns again

[dannyjayart]

Finally getting into The Simpsons, and of course I had to ponify the guys hehe

I present Donut Hole, his wife Meringue, their son Blue Razz, their daughter Lavender Lemon, and their youngest daughter Magnolia Blossom ♡♡

[irishironclad]

[werewolf-transgenderism]

breaking news! new beautiful photo of the best species of frog in the world just dropped

cochranella euknemos, 📸 nuqui_herping on instagram

[werewolf-transgenderism]

for everyone in the notes lamenting that this guy is poisonous: they are not! they're just pretty :) since they're a glass frog, their major defense mechanism is being translucent and hiding their blood while they sleep so they look extra translucent and blend in with leaves <3

[mckitterick]

[russianbluewitch]

I no longer believe that prohibition failed because “if you tell an American not to do something, they’ll only do it more” or “we can’t force people to obey the religious rules of radicals”

If that was true we’d be mocking Mohammed non-stop

Turns out you CAN get Americans to obey religious convictions, as long as you’re willing to literally kill people for defying them

[russianbluewitch]

Before anyone accuses me of wanting to piss on the poor, I’m not advocating that we bring back prohibition, but this time with guillotines

[russianbluewitch]

I no longer believe that prohibition failed because “if you tell an American not to do something, they’ll only do it more” or “we can’t force people to obey the religious rules of radicals”

If that was true we’d be mocking Mohammed non-stop

Turns out you CAN get Americans to obey religious convictions, as long as you’re willing to literally kill people for defying them

[russianbluewitch]

In 20 years, someone will make a video titled “The CRAZIEST Scooby Doo reboot we all forgot” and the thumbnail will have Scooby Doo in a don’t sign with the caption “No Scooby Doo!?”

And at the halfway point the narrator will say “I’m sure you’re all questioning who thought this was a good idea, but you have to remember the way studios thought back then.”