[chenslucy]

DREW STARKEY on The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon

[hashirahottakes]

18+ MDNI | NSFW – GIYUU TOMIOKA

Thinking about GIYUU who'd have you chest to chest, your useless legs thrown over his shoulders, him pressing you down into the bed as his cock rams into your cunt with slow, messy thrusts as his hips stutter.

He's panting into your ear like a dog in heat, both of you acting like you're two bunnies going at for hours. How many times did he cum inside you already? Four–? No, five times maybe? His cum is dripping out of your already filled pussy, making a huge mess on the now cum-stained sheets. His cock twitches inside of your cunt, and he whimpers oh-so-prettily against your ear.

He'd have his face buried in the crook of your neck, hands gripping your hips like he's afraid he'll float away if he did. His pants are getting louder and heavier, hotness hitting your skin. Whimpers leaving his pretty plump lips, moaning into your skin.

He plants kisses under your ear, rutting into your messy pussy like he'll die if he stays still for too long. Biting at your earlobe, nipping and kissing around your ear as he makes the prettiest sounds imaginable.

"Hahh~ ngh‐ agh! Darli–ing! Hngh, please, please, please, just—just one more, okay?"

His teeth graze the space below your ear, and you swear that the same moment Giyuu gripped your thighs and pushed them up your chest, he had lost himself completely in pleasure.

The fat head of his cock hit your cervix repeatedly, and when he finally shot his sticky load into your sensitive cunt, his deep blue eyes rolled back and he let out the prettiest, filthiest moan known to mankind.

Save to say, you two went for another round when his cum didn't want to stay inside you.

© 𝒉𝒂𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒓𝒂𝒉𝒐𝒕𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 ²⁰²⁵

do not copy, translate, or plagiarize my works in any way.

[bowlvers]

giyuu and his VERY intimidating wife

you had been pacing for the past five minutes.

giyuu hadn’t said a word.

he was sitting at the table, perfectly straight, hands folded neatly in his lap like a student in detention.

“i swear,” you started, spinning around to face him, “every single time i tell you to be careful, what do you do? you nearly get yourself killed!”

he blinked, “..i didn’t.”

“yet!” you snapped, throwing your hands up. “do you think that makes it better?!”

he went silent again, eyes lowering to the floor. his shoulders slumped slightly, the tiniest bit — that was how you knew he felt bad.

“don’t you ‘quiet guilt’ your way out of this,” you warned, pointing at him. “that sad little face isn’t going to save you this time.”

he looked up, startled. “i wasn’t—”

“you were. you do it every time. i start yelling, you look like i just kicked your dog, and then i feel bad and let you off easy.”

he blinked again, looking faintly wounded. “…you wouldn’t kick a dog.”

“that’s not the—!” you groaned and dragged your hand down your face. “that’s so not the point, giyuu.”

you took a breath, trying to calm down. he just sat there, watching you like a cat who’d accidentally knocked over a vase.

finally, you crossed your arms and said, “you are so lucky i love you.”

his eyes flicked up, soft but hesitant. “…does that mean you forgive me?”

“no!” you said immediately. “no means i love you in spite of your utter lack of self-preservation!”

he nodded, solemnly. “i see.”

“you clearly don’t,” you muttered, grabbing the medicine box from the shelf. “because if you did, you wouldn’t come home looking like you just rolled through a battlefield. oh wait— you did.”

he murmured, almost under his breath, “it wasn’t that bad.”

you whipped your head toward him. “what did you just say?”

he froze, like he’d just realized his mistake. “…nothing.”

“mhm.” you crouched in front of him, cleaning the cut on his arm a little rougher than usual. “you stress me out, you know that?”

he winced but didn’t complain. “i’m sorry.”

“you should be.”

“i am.”

“you always are.”

he paused. “…you’re still angry.”

“you think?”

he looked like he wanted to say something else, then stopped, lips pressing together. after a long beat, he murmured “i’m sorry” again.

you just stared at him. then sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose. “you know what? sit. just— sit there. quietly. don’t move.”

he nodded obediently. “okay.”

“—actually, go fold the laundry.”

“yes ma’am.”

[ryellee]

Yall idk if there already is one but there should be a gojo x reader fic where it’s just reader self inserting into the hidden inventory ark or just the whole Jjk show

[lynsquared]

₊°༺ WHERE OUR BLUE IS MASTERLIST + TAGLIST៸៸ satoru gojo x reader ༻°₊ ｡

˖ ࣪ ‹ (synopsis) 𖥔 ࣪ jjk reader insert; from teenagers to adults, there's always been something between you and satoru gojo. after losing those precious to you, there's only so much you can keep to yourself before you let it spill.

˖ ࣪ ‹ (warnings + character notes) slow burn, fluff, angst, and eventual smut. death, fighting, blood, and more will be mentioned throughout this series! it will follow the jjk timeline, though some scenes and scenarios are bound to change.

˖ ࣪ ‹ (taglist info) shoot me a dm or comment under this post to be added to the taglist!

<3, lynn

hidden inventory/premature death arc

episode one: hidden inventory

episode two: hidden inventory part 2

episode three: hidden inventory part 3

episode four: hidden inventory part 4

episode five: premature death

jujutsu kaisen 0 (coming soon!)

jujutsu kaisen season one (coming soon!)

jujutsu kaisen season two (coming soon!)

jujutsu kaisen season three (coming soon!)

[pillsatoru]

your needoh pops ─ so you use gojo's balls as your new fidget

one hand was fisted in your hair as the other was aggressively squeezing at the toy. your professor had the nerve to mark points off because of single mistake. “this is such bullshit.” you hissed to yourself, staring at the screen. there in bold black letters read ‘unclear understanding of light years. please revise before 06/02.’

your boyfriend walked into the kitchen where you were, hunched over on the island. he sucked in his cheeks as he opened the fridge, looking over at a very distressed you.

“everything alright, sweet cheeks?” his eyes fell down to your needoh, the thing that has been enduring your stress for the past semester. he wasn’t complaining. it’s better for in an inmate object to take all your anger instead of him. right?

“no!” you groaned, dragging your free hand down your face. “my professor is being a total dick! i accidentally wrote down that light years are the unit of time instead of distance and he took off twenty fricking points!”

your freshly manicured nails dug into the dough, poking at it. “i hate him, babe!”

“i can imagine.” satoru grabbed a soda can from the fridge before closing it with a swing of his hip. “you’re gonna pop that shit.” he pointed over to your abused stress toy.

just as you were about to snap at him, the unthinkable happened.

the needoh popped.

you watched in horror as the gel oozed out from several areas where your nails previously were. satoru’s cheeks puffed up in order to prevent himself from laughing at your reaction.

you shot a glare at him.

“what did you expect? your nails were stabbing it!” he cackled, setting down the drink. “dont tell me you’re actually upset.”

“i am!” you shout. “that thing was what was keeping me together!”

satoru placed his hand on his chest in offense. “what about me?” his pretty pink lips formed into a frown. “what about you?” you mumbled, carefully touching the sticky substance of what used to be your needoh in utter sadness.

“i’m keeping you together, aren’t i?”

“yeah, but you’re no-“ you paused. what else was smoothly textured and could be squeezed? your boyfriends balls.

“oh my fuck- be gentle!” satoru’s hands gripped onto the bedsheets next to him as yours squeezed each ball. “you offered to be my new stress reliever.”

“i meant like regular sex! not whatever this is!” his hips gave involuntary thrusts, cock twitching in hopes of getting the same attention his testis were. “i said be gentle..!” he yelps.

your computer was on your lap, typing the rephrased sentence that was incorrect. your hand never slowed that the ‘massage’, taking notice of how overstimulated your boyfriend looked next to you.

his face was red, sweat forming at his forehead. his neglected cock got wrapped around his hand. “shit.” a string of curses spilled from his lips, jerking himself off at the same pace your hand was going.

eventually, the pressure was too much for him to handle. his body jerks in desperation. he never would’ve thought he’d have an orgasm over getting his balls fondled with but hey, there’s a first time for everything.

ropes of cum land on his stomach, dick still not softening. he threw his head back, gasping when you didn’t stop. “babyyyy.”

you had finished your revision a few minutes ago, actually. but you took pleasure in watching him act this way. your fingers gathered up some of the liquid on his stomach, spreading it down onto his balls like lotion. “i’m almost done toru, just keep being a good toy for me.”

I JUST MADE SOME BS ⊹ ࣪ ˖ can y'all tell I heart gojo's balls.

ok bai.

[sluttyangel04]

18+ cockwarming with satoru gone wrong

it’s in the middle of the night when satoru has you pinned against the warmth of his body, bare chest pressing against your back.

“pleasee, darling— just.. let me fuck you,” he whimpers into your ear, emphasizing his request by giving you a mean thrust of his hips.

his hardened length is nestled between your slick pussy lips right now. it’s rubbing on your clit so you can’t help it that some moans escape you.

the whole point of this was to just get you wet enough, so that satoru could slide his dick into you. he’d been so adamant about wanting to sleep with his dick buried inside you and today you finally said yes. but now? he’s too pussy drunk to even think straight.

“stop.. seriously satoru– I am not gonna agree another time if you mess this up,” your voice rings out harsher than you intend it to and he pouts, stopping his act on trying to demolish you with his cock.

instead, his hand wraps around the shaft of it and a second later you feel the head press against your entrance. it’s slick from satorus earlier mission to get you all soaked —which totally worked out for him. that said, his cock slides in easily, splitting you open just for him.

oh god

for someone who was so serious a second ago, the shaky gasp that comes out of your mouth sounds a little too needy for satorus liking. he’s grabbing your hips to pull you closer and in an instant he’s completely bottoming out with a low grunt against your neck.

your walls noticeably clench around his cock and you need to bite back a whimper with how full you are. god, how are you gonna survive the night?

both your breaths quicken and for some moments there’s only that filling the otherwise silent room.

and then there’s satoru squeezing your body tightly against his. he‘s probably trying to ground himself before he does anything stupid.

“we should.. sleep,” you manage to rasp out and try to actually relax in bed. but satoru is squeezing you so tight it’s impossible.

“satoru—“

“—I can’t do this anymore,” satoru whimpers out loud. his breath is ghosting over your neck and if it weren’t already for how devastated he sounds (which got you all worked up btw), you would’ve given him everything he wanted at latest now.

no time to answer, protest or react in any way; he pulls away from you, dick sliding almost all the way out. just to pound back into you with a hard thrust.

“satoru!–“ a deep groan makes it’s way out of his throat and you can’t bite back the guttural sound that leaves yours too. satoru starts to thrust into you with a punishing pace and you turn into a mess. eyes are rolling, head thrown back and pathetic moans spill out of you.

clap!, clap!, clap!

it’s nasty. the way his balls slap against you with every hard thrust, echoing through the room. and the air reeks of sex.

he’s not slowing down, ruining you entirely and even if you wanted to, you couldn’t do anything about it.

“fuck– fuuck! satoru—“ that’s all he’s hearing and it’s enough to spur him on even more. you’re close and it can’t be overlooked with the way your body’s shaking beneath him.

you’re a moaning and trembling wreck, trying to hold onto the bed sheets for good. though, it’s not helping you with the way satoru is ruining you. he himself is way too far gone, somewhere else in his head. all he sees right now is your pretty pussy wanting to get demolished by him.

his thrusts are getting messier with every pound. he’s close too. but he’s not letting that stop him.

his breathing turns hoarse and he’s grunting a lot. fuck, if that’s not hot.

“hmmpf– sato! ‘m c-close! hah— ! I-I’m gonna.. s-shiit,” your eyes roll back once again and a pathetic moan rips it’s way out of your lungs. you’re loud. you’re moaning his name over and over while you’re coming all around his cock and your walls squeeze him so hard as your orgasm wrecks your whole body.

“fuuuck– babe!—“ satoru isn’t spared by your orgasm. he’s groaning and whimpering as your walls squeeze him so bad that his own orgasm crashes through him right after you. spurts of his cum fill you up, so much that it’s already leaking out the sides.

he’s throwing his head back and grinding his hips into you like a mad man. riding both your orgasms out and pumping his seed back into you.

completely done, you both collapse onto the bed sheets then to try and calm your breathing.

finally relaxed you turn your head to satoru who’s still nestled deep inside of you. he’s running a hand through the sweaty hair sticking to his forehead and laughs nervously.

“phuu— that was something. but don’t worry darling, we can go to sleep now.” he grins as he tugs you against his chest again, cuddling you with his dick still buried deep and not making any attempts to pull out.

oh, fuck him.

guess satoru got his cockwarming after all.

all rights reserved ©sluttyangel04 - do not copy, translate, plagiarize or feed my work into ai.

like my work? find more of my writings here !

tags: @mrskamikazekaito @nanashutiao

[tays-writing]

!nerdjo x reader | part 8

Exam stress leads to a late night horny decision. Everything is going great, until the guy in the video starts sounding a little too familiar

part 1 here! . part 2 here! . part 3 here! . part 4 here! part 5 here! part 6 here! . part 7 here!

cr: 3vangel1ne_ on X

cw: vaginal sex, cowgirl position, belly bulge, creampie, oral sex (f&m rec), shower sex, fingering, squirting, overstimulation, light sub/dom dynamics, size kink, dirty talk, praise kink, cum play/cum eating, aftercare.

Playlist: wet dreams / scream my name / worship / muse / dangerous / pretty boy

Shoko nudged your shoulder lightly. You were both standing on the balcony, the cool night air a welcome contrast to the warmth inside. She leaned against the railing, a cigarette between her fingers, while you rested against the low wall, facing the inside of the apartment.

Shoko followed your gaze.

Across the room, Suguru was in the middle of telling some ridiculous story, waving his hands dramatically. Choso looked mildly concerned for no apparent reason, and Satoru... Satoru was laughing. Really laughing. Shoulders shaking, his head slightly tilted as he pushed his glasses back up his nose with that familiar little gesture.

“You’re staring again,” Shoko said, amused.

You didn't bother denying it or looking away.

“I’ve never seen you like this before.”

That finally pulled your attention back to her.

You frowned.

“Mmh?”

“Don’t give me that look”  she added, exhaling a thin stream of smoke.

“What look?”

“The one where you're about to pretend this is all because he's ridiculously hot.”

You scoffed. “He is ridiculously hot.”

“Oh, absolutely,” Shoko agreed without hesitation. “No one’s denying that.”

She took another slow drag from her cigarette, watching you carefully.

“I’ve seen you want people before. I’ve seen you get crushes. But this…” She gestured vaguely toward the living room with her cigarette. “I’ve never seen you watch someone like this. I’ve never seen you zone out completely because of someone.”

Your eyes drifted back to Satoru almost against your will. He wasn’t doing anything special—just listening to Suguru, smiling softly, occasionally adding a comment that made Choso smile.

“...We barely know each other” you murmured.

Shoko hummed thoughtfully.

“But the chemistry is there. And not just the class project kind.”

You rolled your eyes, but couldn't quite hide the small smile tugging at your lips.

She nodded subtly toward the living room.

“Apparently he’s the nicest guy alive. Suguru literally never shuts up about him,” she continued. “Top of the class, doesn't sleep around, calls his mom every week, helps younger students without complaining, shares his notes…”

You couldn't help smiling. You tried to hide it behind your beer, but Shoko was too sharp.

“There it is” she said with a smirk.

“I still don’t really know him” you protested weakly.

“No, you don’t.” Shoko shrugged. “But maybe it’s time you actually let yourself.”

You looked back at Satoru. At that exact moment, he glanced over. The second your eyes met, the corners of his mouth lifted into that impossibly shy, soft smile you were starting to recognize all too well.

Your stomach did a traitorous little flip. You looked away first.

A comfortable silence settled between you and Shoko for a few seconds. Then, naturally, she ruined it.

“...Anyway.”

You already knew that tone.

“Fuck his brains out first.”

“Jesus Christ, Shoko.”

“What?” she asked, looking genuinely innocent. “Were you planning on going home alone after whatever happened inside that room? Don’t play with me.”

“Get it out of your system” she continued with a smirk. “Then, once neither of you is thinking through a thick haze of unbearable horniness... you can figure out the rest.”

You opened your mouth to argue, but nothing came out.

Shoko noticed, of course.

“...Yeah,” she said with a knowing smile, flicking the ash from her cigarette. “That’s what I thought”

You rolled your eyes, unable to suppress a quiet laugh.

“You’re insufferable.”

—

About half an hour later, the party had begun to wind down. Empty beer bottles cluttered the coffee table, conversations had broken off into smaller groups, and someone had quietly started stacking pizza boxes in the kitchen.

You crossed the living room until you found Satoru standing near the couch, absentmindedly listening to whatever Choso and Suguru were arguing about.

Without interrupting them, you stepped beside him and lightly squeezed his hand.

He looked down at your hand before lifting his eyes to yours.

You tilted your head toward the front door.

“Let’s go?” 

His expression softened instantly. He gave a small nod before turning to Suguru.

“I was just gonna—”

“Go” Suguru interrupted before he could finish, waving him off with one hand.

Satoru blinked.

“...Oh.”

Suguru finally glanced at the two of you, a knowing grin spreading across his face.

“Seriously. Get out of here.”

—

The taxi ride back to your apartment had been almost painfully quiet. Not because there was nothing to say — quite the opposite. There was too much.

Every time Satoru's hand brushed against yours, every time his knee bumped yours in the backseat, it felt like another reminder of everything you had been holding back.

But the moment the door to your apartment slammed shut behind you, that restraint finally snapped. Weeks of edging, of waiting, of holding back — you were done. This wasn’t going to be about being patient anymore.

You pushed him against the nearest wall, crashing your lips against his. He kissed you back like he’d been dying for it all night — hot, hungry, and a little clumsy in his eagerness. His tongue slid against yours in messy, needy strokes, tasting you deeply as soft, desperate sounds escaped his throat.

You moaned into his mouth, fingers threading through his messy white hair, tugging him even closer. Your hands moved frantically, pulling at the hem of his shirt. Satoru broke the kiss just long enough to help you yank it over his head and toss it aside. You immediately ran your hands over his toned chest, feeling the warmth of his skin and the way his muscles tensed and shivered under your touch.

He moaned softly against your lips, his large hands hovering at your waist like he was afraid to touch too much. You could feel how painfully hard he already was, his erection pressing insistently against your stomach through his pants.

You broke the kiss for air, both of you breathing heavily. You kissed along his jaw and down to his neck, sucking gently on his skin.

“Hold on.” you murmured.

You quickly unzipped and kicked off your knee-high boots, leaving yourself barefoot. The difference in height forced you onto your tiptoes as you reached for him, tugging lightly at the front of his shirt to bring him down a little. Satoru noticed immediately. His hands slid to your waist, steadying you before leaning down the rest of the way.

“Fuck— you turn me on so much” you whispered against his neck.

He tilted his head to give you better access, a shaky breath leaving him when you started sucking on his skin. You licked and kissed his neck slowly, then sucked harder, leaving a hickey just below his ear.

“Ah— fuck…” he breathed, voice already hoarse.

You smiled against his skin and kept going, kissing lower, sucking another mark onto his collarbone. Satoru whimpered softly, his hips twitching forward, pressing his hard cock against you.

“You’re so sensitive here,” you murmured, licking over the fresh hickey. “I love the sounds you make.”

You pulled back just enough to look at him. His cheeks were flushed pink, lips swollen and shiny, eyes half-lidded with lust. He looked beautiful like this — desperate, and completely focused on you.

Your blouse came off next. You unclasped your bra and let it fall. His gaze dropped immediately to your bare breasts. He swallowed hard.

“You’re… so beautiful” he whispered, voice shy and breathless.

You took one of his hands and placed it on your breast. His palm was warm as he cupped you, thumb brushing tentatively over your nipple.

“Touch me more, Satoru,” you encouraged softly. “I want to feel your hands on me.”

That seemed to give him the confidence he needed. His other hand came up, both now kneading your breasts gently, thumbs circling your nipples until they hardened.  He leaned in and started kissing your neck, shy at first, then growing bolder — sucking softly, then harder, leaving his own marks on your skin.

You moaned quietly, arching into him. One of your hands slid down to palm his cock through his pants, stroking him slowly. Satoru gasped against your neck, hips twitching forward into your touch.

You reached up to cup his face with both hands, your thumbs brushing over his warm cheeks as you kissed him deeply.

You broke the kiss just long enough to catch your breath, both of you breathing heavily. Then you pressed one last soft peck against his lips.

“Take off your pants” you whispered against his lips.

Without a word, he obeyed, quickly unbuttoning and pushing his pants down his long legs. He kicked them aside, now standing in front of you in just his black boxers, the fabric tented obscenely by his hard cock.

You smiled, pleased, and pressed yourself against him again. Your bare breasts brushed against his chest, your already hard nipples sensitive at the touch of his skin.

“So hard for me already…” you purred, palming him through the thin fabric. “I can’t wait to have you inside me, Satoru. I’m losing my mind.”

Neither of you seemed capable of staying still. Mouths found each other again, kisses growing sloppier with every step as you stumbled backwards. His hands clung to your waist, yours on his chest.

The back of his knees finally caught the edge of the couch. You took advantage of it, giving him one firm push against his chest.

He dropped onto the cushions with a quiet exhale, looking up at you through flushed cheeks and swollen lips, desire softening the usual shyness in his eyes.

“I’m not going to tease you anymore, Satoru,” you murmured as you slowly slid your skirt and panties down your legs, stepping out of them. “You deserve this so much.”

Satoru’s eyes followed every movement, utterly mesmerized.

Without breaking eye contact, you stepped between his legs and slowly settled onto his lap, one knee on either side of him. His hands twitched instinctively, unsure where to touch until you closed the remaining distance yourself.

You buried your face in the crook of his neck, breathing him in with a long, slow inhale. “I wanted this for so long…”

You lingered there for a heartbeat before reaching up to his face. Your fingers slid carefully along the frame of his glasses, lifting them off with surprising gentleness.

You placed them beside him on the couch before cupping his face again, smiling softly to yourself.

“There you are…” Your thumb traced slowly across his lower lip before cupping his jaw. “My pretty boy.”

His breath caught sharply.

He’d imagined moments like this for months—late at night, alone in his room, convincing himself it would never be anything more than a fantasy. Yet here you were, close enough for him to feel your warmth, looking at him with the same intensity he’d only ever dreamed about.

This can’t be real, his mind screamed. She’s really choosing me.

“Cat got your tongue, Toru?”

“I-I…” His voice barely came out above a whisper. "I’m sorry. It’s just... it’s too much.”

You smiled, your thumb still resting against his jaw.

“But we haven’t even started yet, baby.”

You reached down between your bodies and hooked your fingers into the waistband of his boxers. Satoru lifted his hips immediately, eager to help. His thick, hard cock sprang free, heavy and flushed dark with arousal, the tip glistening with precum. It twitched visibly under your gaze.

You wrapped your hand around the base, stroking him slowly, savoring how hot and heavy he felt in your palm. Satoru let out a shaky, broken moan, head falling back against the couch.

“F-fuck…” he whimpered, the sound so needy it sent heat rushing through you.

You positioned yourself over him, rubbing the fat, swollen head of his cock against your soaked folds. You were dripping, coating every inch of him as you teased the tip against your entrance.

The way he looked at you — like you were something sacred — made something warm bloom inside your ribs. You weren’t ready to name it yet, but it was there.

You sank down a little, taking only the head inside. Your pussy clenched tightly around it, dripping slick down his shaft.

Satoru let out a broken whimper, his hands gripping your thighs hard as he stared at the place where your hole was stretched obscenely around just the tip of his cock.

“Ahh— shit…” you gasped. “Look at how you’re stretching me.”

Satoru was trembling beneath you, breathing ragged, completely mesmerized by the sight. His fingers dug into your flesh, a high-pitched whimper escaping his throat.

“Oh my god…” he breathed shakily, eyes squeezed shut. “You’re so tight—Fuck—I can’t—”

Slowly, very slowly, you started sinking down further. Inch by inch, your tight pussy opening up around his thick length. The stretch was intense. Halfway down, you had to pause, breathing hard.

“God, you’re filling me so much,” you whispered, voice trembling. “Look how greedy my pussy is for you, Satoru. Only—fuck— for you.”

A broken whimper left his lips.

“You’re too—Ahh— too good for me,” he moaned softly, almost in disbelief.

His words made your heart clench. You leaned down and kissed him again, your hands on his chest for leverage as you continued lowering yourself, painfully slow, letting your pussy adjust to his size. The wet, squelching sound was filthy as you took another inch.

Satoru looked completely pussy-drunk — eyes half-lidded, cheeks flushed, mouth open as he panted. He looked like he was about to cry from how good it felt.

You took a deep breath, locked eyes with him, and slowly sank the rest of the way down.

Satoru let out a broken, choked moan. His head fell forward, burying his face in the crook of your neck as his arms wrapped tightly around your waist.

“Ah— shit, Satoru—” you gasped sharply.

You stayed still for a moment, just feeling him throb deep inside you. Your thoughts were swirling — this felt too good, too intimate.

He bit down hard on your neck, teeth sinking into your skin as a deep, guttural groan vibrated against you.

“Fuck— I’m sorry,” he whimpered, voice muffled against your neck, sounding genuinely overwhelmed. “It’s too much… you’re too tight… I can’t— I can’t think straight…”

The bulge in your stomach was unmistakable — a clear, obscene outline of his thick nine-inch cock deep inside you.

You lifted your hips slowly until only the fat head remained inside, then slammed back down hard. The wet slap of skin meeting skin filled the room.

You began to bounce on his cock.

At first it was slow and deep, savoring the way he stretched you open with every descent. But soon your pace quickened. You were bouncing harder, faster, your ass rippling every time you slammed down on him.

Satoru was a complete mess underneath you. He kept his face buried in your neck, biting and sucking marks into your skin while whimpering and moaning with every bounce.

The sounds were filthy — loud, wet, sloppy squelching as your soaked pussy took his entire length over and over. Your juices were dripping down his balls and onto the couch.

“Fuck—Look at me, Satoru—Ah—” you moaned, riding him like you owned him. “Tell me how good it feels.”

Satoru lifted his head, eyes glassy and teary with pleasure, lips swollen. He looked completely ruined.

“You feel perfect—fuck!—Everything about you is perfect.”

You kept bouncing on his cock, harder and faster, your ass slapping loudly against his thighs with every descent.

Satoru was losing it. His hands gripped your hips tightly, fingers digging into your skin as he looked up at you with glassy, desperate eyes.

“Fuck—Ahh—you’re so tight,” he moaned, voice hoarse and shaky. “I feel your pussy squeezing me so hard.”

You moaned loudly, riding him even harder.

“You’re going to kill me—Ahh—it’s too much.”

His words only made you wetter. You bounced faster, grinding your clit against him on every downstroke.

“I’m losing my fucking mind. You’re ruining me— ahh fuck— I’ve never felt anything like this. Please don’t stop,” he whimpered, voice breaking.

You were riding him relentlessly now, the couch creaking under you. Your moans were getting louder, more desperate.

“Fuck—I can’t,” your legs were burning up, your rhythm faltering a little.

But suddenly, Satoru’s grip on your hips tightened, and he took control.

He started thrusting up into you hard, meeting every bounce with powerful upward strokes. The angle changed completely — he was slamming into you so deep it knocked the air out of your lungs.

“Ah—! Fuck— Satoru!” you cried out, voice cracking.

He fucked you harder, hips snapping up brutally, driving his thick cock into you again and again. The wet slapping sounds became obscene.

“You feel so good,” he moaned against your neck.

You started moaning and whimpering uncontrollably. Loud, shameless sounds spilled from your mouth — high-pitched cries and broken whimpers that surprised even you.

“Satoru— fuck— too deep—!” you screamed, your voice cracking as he pounded into you.

You couldn’t stop the noises. Every hard thrust made you whimper and moan louder, your body shaking on top of him. You were shocked at how loud and desperate you sounded, but you couldn’t hold it back.

Satoru kept thrusting up into you with raw desperation, his thick cock slamming deep inside your pussy with every powerful stroke.

Your moans quickly turned into helpless, high-pitched whimpers.

“Ah— ah— ah—!” you cried out, the sounds spilling from your mouth uncontrollably. “You’re gonna make me cum so hard, Satoru—Fuck!”

“Fuck— shit…” he groaned, voice strained. “I’m— ahh fuck— I’m gonna cum just from listening to you.”

He fucked you even harder, driving his cock as deep as possible. Your voice cracked as you whimpered again and again.

Your orgasm hit you like a freight train. It crashed through your body without warning. Your thighs clamped violently around Satoru’s hips as your pussy clenched down hard around his thick cock, spasming uncontrollably.

“Ahh—! Satoru—!” you cried out, voice breaking into a loud, shameless moan.

Your entire body shook. The pleasure was blinding. You kept moving through it, hips jerking as wave after wave ripped through you, your pussy fluttering and squeezing him rhythmically.

Satoru’s eyes widened, a broken sound tearing from his throat.

“Fuck—I’m gonna cum—” he gasped desperately, voice cracking.

His hands gripped your hips hard, trying to lift you off him, clearly fighting to pull out in time.

But you didn’t let him.

You slammed yourself down hard, taking him to the hilt again, and wrapped your arms tightly around his neck, holding him in place. Your legs locked around him like a vice.

“No— stay inside,” you begged, voice trembling and urgent. “Cum inside me, Toru— I’m on the pill. Please— fill me up. I want to feel you cumming deep inside me.”

Satoru let out a wrecked, broken moan, his resistance crumbling instantly.

“Fuck— fuck—!”

With a loud, broken moan he slammed up into you one last time, burying himself to the hilt. His cock pulsed violently as he came hard, flooding your pussy with thick, hot ropes of cum. He kept thrusting up into you with short, desperate movements, pushing his load deeper while whimpering your name against your skin.

There was so much cum that it started leaking out around his cock, making everything even messier.

You held him tightly through it, one arm wrapped around his shoulders while your other hand stroked the back of his neck gently. Soft praises spilled from your lips right against his ear as he shuddered and emptied himself completely inside you.

“You’re beautiful… so, so beautiful,” you whispered, voice tender. “Such a good boy for me… You’re doing so well, Toru.”

He whimpered with every praise, the sound broken and needy, his face buried in the crook of your neck. You felt his tears against your skin as you gently wiped them away with your thumb.

“So pretty like this,” you continued softly, kissing the side of his head. “All mine… You came so much for me”

Satoru let out another shaky whimper, his arms tightening around your waist as the last pulses of his orgasm faded. His cock was still buried deep inside you, thick and warm, twitching with the aftershocks.

You both stayed like that for a long moment, breathing hard, bodies slick with sweat and cum. 

You kept stroking his hair and the nape of his neck, murmuring soft praises until his trembling slowly subsided. His face remained hidden against your neck, almost like he was embarrassed by how hard he had cum.

“You’re okay,” you whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to his temple. “I’ve got you.”

Satoru nodded weakly against your skin, still too overwhelmed to speak properly. His cock gave one final twitch inside you, making you both sigh softly.

Slowly, almost reverently, he held your waist and lifted you off his cock. The moment the thick head slipped out of you, a huge gush of his warm cum poured out of your stretched pussy, dripping messily onto him.

He let out a low, broken moan at the sight, eyes dark as he watched his own seed leak out of you and coat his skin.

“There’s so much cum… all leaking out of you,” he whispered, voice hoarse.

You shivered at his words. He pulled you down gently until your bodies were pressed together, your cum-covered pussy resting against his softening but still heavy cock.

You leaned in and kissed him deeply, slow and filthy. Tongues sliding together, tasting each other as you both caught your breath.

After a long minute, you pulled back slightly, brushing some of his messy white hair out of his face.

“Shower?” you murmured against his lips.

Satoru nodded, eyes still dazed and soft. “Yeah… shower sounds good.”

You took his hand and led him to the bathroom. The moment you turned on the water, warm steam quickly filled the space. You stepped under the spray first, sighing as the hot water cascaded over your bodies.

For a moment, it was gentle.

You both stood under the water, smiling softly at each other. Satoru looked at you like he couldn’t believe you were real. He reached out, cupping your face with both hands, and kissed you again — slower this time, sweet and lingering.

When you pulled back, you stayed close, just looking at him. Water ran down his sharp jawline, his broad shoulders, the defined lines of his chest. He was beautiful.

Satoru blushed under your gaze.

“W-what?” he asked shyly, a small smile tugging at his lips.

“Nothing,” you whispered, then leaned in and kissed him again, softer this time.

He felt like he was dreaming. The girl he had been secretly obsessed with for months was standing naked in the shower with him, kissing him like she couldn’t get enough. His heart was racing.

He grabbed the body wash, poured some into his hands, and started gently washing you. His soapy hands glided over your shoulders, down your arms, then across your chest. He took his time, thumbs brushing over your nipples until they hardened again.

Then he sank down to his knees in front of you.

He washed your legs carefully, hands sliding up your calves, behind your knees, then higher up your thighs. When his fingers brushed between your legs, he froze.

You were soaked again.

Not just from the shower. Your pussy was slick and puffy, still leaking his cum mixed with your own arousal.

Satoru looked up at you from his knees, water dripping from his white hair, eyes wide with awe and hunger.

You felt your face burn.

“I– This never happened to me before,” you mumbled.

Satoru tilted his head, confused.

“Feeling… insatiable,” you admitted. “I.. can’t seem to get enough of you.”

The look on Satoru’s face was pure heart-eyes. His cheeks flushed darker, but his expression was so tender it made your chest ache.

He leaned forward slowly, pressing a soft kiss to your lower belly, then lower.

Your breath hitched when his nose brushed against your clit.

“Would you let me?” he asked, voice shy but hopeful, looking up at you from under wet lashes.

“Yeah… please,” you whispered.

Satoru moaned softly. He pressed one hand against your stomach, gently pinning you back against the cool tile wall, then lifted your right leg and hooked it over his broad shoulder.

The first long, slow lick from your entrance all the way up to your clit made you moan loudly.

“Ahhh—”

You slapped one hand against the wall for balance, the other tangling into his soaked white hair.

Satoru moaned against your pussy, the vibration traveling straight through you.

He was gentle at first — soft, reverent licks, savoring the taste of both of you mixed together. But it didn’t stay gentle for long. Soon he was licking deeper, sucking softly on your clit, then fucking his tongue inside you like he couldn’t get enough.

“You’re perfect,” he murmured against your soaked folds, voice muffled. “So sweet… I’d live just for you to use me.”

You tugged his hair harder, hips rolling against his face as the hot water continued pouring over both of you.

Satoru looked up at you again, eyes dark with lust, water streaming down his face.

The memory of his own shower video flashed in your mind — him stroking his huge cock under the water, moaning your name — and it made you even wetter.

Satoru groaned against your pussy like he was the one being pleasured. His tongue flicked rapidly over your swollen clit while two long fingers pushed inside you without warning.

The sudden pace of his tongue made you cry out, back arching against the wet tile wall.

“Fuck— Satoru—!”

You were still sensitive from your previous orgasm, but the pleasure was building again at an alarming rate.

He added a third finger, stretching you wider, and kept licking on your clit like it was the most delicious dessert in the world.

Your thighs started trembling.

The way he licked you — fast, messy, almost desperate — combined with his thick fingers pumping deep inside you was driving you insane.

He flattened his tongue and dragged it slowly up your slit, then focused entirely on your clit. He circled it with the tip of his tongue, fast and precise, before sucking the sensitive bundle of nerves into his mouth with just the right pressure.

“Ah— fuck, right there—!” you moaned, hips bucking against his face, grinding against his tongue.

Satoru whimpered in response. He sucked harder on your clit, alternating between suction and rapid flicks of his tongue while his fingers curled inside you, stroking that perfect spot over and over.

He was completely lost in you, drunk on your pussy, moaning against your folds like a man starved.

“Don’t stop—” you gasped. “I’m so close.”

The words pushed him over the edge of desperation. He moaned loudly against your clit, the vibration sending shockwaves through you. His fingers fucked you faster, curling relentlessly while his tongue worked your swollen clit without mercy.

The pressure built impossibly fast.

“Oh my god— I’m— I’m gonna—”

Your back arched hard against the tile wall as you came with a loud, broken cry. Your pussy clenched violently around his fingers, and then—

You squirted.

Hard.

Clear, hot fluid gushed out of you, soaking Satoru’s face, his glasses, and his chest. The sensation was so sudden and intense that your eyes widened in shock.

Oh my god… he just made me squirt.

You had never squirted before in your life.

Satoru, on the other hand, didn’t even flinch. He was too far gone, too drunk on you. He moaned like he was the one cumming, eagerly drinking up as much as he could, tongue still flicking over your pulsing clit through your orgasm, completely addicted.

You were shaking, legs barely holding you up as wave after wave crashed through you. The sight of him — face buried between your legs, completely drenched in you, moaning like it was the best thing he’d ever tasted — made the pleasure even more overwhelming.

When the last tremors finally faded, you looked down at him, breathing hard, still stunned by what had just happened. You ran your fingers through his wet hair, heart pounding.

You gently tugged his hair, pulling him back just enough to look at you.

“Stand up, Satoru,” you said, voice still a little shaky but firm. “I’m going to return the favor.”

Satoru blinked up at you, water dripping from his lashes, lips shiny with your juices.

“N-no… I didn’t do it for—” he started, voice hoarse and shy.

“Shh, Toru,” you cut him off softly, thumb brushing over his swollen bottom lip. “I’m really dying to have you on my tongue.”

Satoru let out a broken, needy whimper at your words. His cock twitched hard between his legs.

He stood up slowly, legs shaky, towering over you again.

You sank down to your knees in front of him, the hot water still pouring over both of you.

Satoru’s eyes widened in shock as you grabbed his massive, wet cock with both hands. It was so thick your fingers didn’t even meet around it. You leaned in and dragged your tongue slowly from the base all the way to the leaking tip, savoring the salty taste of him and the way his cock twitched violently in your grip.

“Fuuuck—!” he moaned, head falling back against the tile wall with a soft thud.

You took him into your mouth as deep as you could, lips stretching wide around his thickness. You worked what you could manage, bobbing your head while stroking the rest with both hands in tight, wet strokes. Satoru was already trembling, soft whimpers and broken moans spilling from his lips like he couldn’t hold them back.

You pulled back for air, strings of saliva connecting your swollen lips to his cock. You smiled up at him, stroking his slick length with long, slow movements.

“Look at you… such a big, pretty cock and you’re already falling apart just from my mouth,” you purred, licking the precum from his tip like it was candy. “You’ve dreamed about this for so long, haven’t you?”

Satoru nodded frantically, breathing ragged and desperate.

“Y-yes… please— I’ve wanted your mouth for so long… I used to cum just thinking about it…”

You took him back into your mouth, sucking harder, bobbing your head while your hand twisted around the base. The wet, obscene sounds filled the shower — sloppy, filthy gagging mixed with his broken whimpers and desperate little gasps of your name.

Every time you pushed deeper and gagged around him, his thighs shook and he let out the prettiest choked moan. Tears were gathering at the corners of his eyes, but he never looked away from you.

You pulled off with a wet pop, stroking him fast with both hands while looking up at him.

“You’re doing so well, baby,” you praised, voice low and sweet. “Letting me use this big cock however I want… Such a good boy for me.”

“Ahhh— Yes– Yes— I’m your good boy,” he moaned, voice breaking beautifully. “I’ll be so good for you… please don’t stop—”

You moaned around his cock and took him even deeper, gagging wetly as tears mixed with the shower water on your cheeks. You loved how he filled your mouth, how heavy and hot he felt on your tongue, how he throbbed every time you swallowed around him.

Satoru’s hand hovered near your head, fingers twitching like he wanted to grab your hair but was still too shy to do it.

You pulled off just enough to speak, lips brushing against his leaking tip.

“You can grab my hair, Toru,” you ordered softly.

His fingers immediately tangled in your wet hair, not pulling hard, but holding you there as you sank back down on him.

The sounds he made were filthy and perfect — high-pitched whimpers, broken moans of your name, desperate little sobs every time you took him to the back of your throat.

You could feel him getting closer, his cock swelling even thicker in your mouth, his thighs trembling violently.

You looked up at him, eyes watering, and hummed around his length — a clear “cum for me” vibration.

With a loud, broken cry, Satoru came hard down your throat, his hips jerking uncontrollably.

Thick, hot ropes of cum flooded your mouth. You swallowed as much as you could, but there was so much it spilled from the corners of your lips, dripping down your chin. You kept sucking him through it, milking every last drop until he was trembling and whimpering from the overstimulation.

Satoru stared down at you like you were a goddess, chest heaving, eyes full of awe and adoration, looking at you like you were the only thing in his universe.

When you finally pulled off with a wet pop, you didn’t swallow everything. You kept a thick load of his cum on your tongue.

You looked up at him and slowly rose to your feet. Satoru’s breath hitched, eyes locked on your mouth.

You stepped closer, cupped his face with both hands, and kissed him deeply.

You pushed your tongue into his mouth, feeding him his own cum.

Satoru moaned loudly into the kiss — a broken, filthy sound that vibrated against your lips. The taste of himself mixed with your saliva made him shudder. His hands grabbed your waist tightly as he kissed you back desperately, sucking on your tongue like he couldn’t get enough of the dirty act. He whimpered against your mouth when you finally pulled back just enough to breathe.

You smiled, wicked and satisfied, and licked his lips one more time.

“Good boy.”

Satoru’s eyes darkened even more. He looked completely dazed, cheeks flushed, breathing ragged.

You leaned in and kissed him again, softer this time — slow, sweet, and full of affection. His arms wrapped around you gently, holding you close under the warm spray.

For the next few minutes, the shower turned tender.

You took turns washing each other. Satoru poured body wash into his hands and carefully cleaned you, his touch gentle as he ran soapy palms over your shoulders, down your back, and between your legs. He was almost shy about it, but his eyes never left your body.

You did the same for him — washing his chest, his arms, his back, and carefully cleaning his softening cock, which still twitched at your touch.

There were lots of soft smiles, quiet laughter, and stolen kisses under the water.

When you were both clean, you turned off the shower and dried each other with big, fluffy towels.

You led him to your bed, both of you still wrapped in towels. You dropped yours first and climbed under the covers, then patted the spot beside you.

Satoru hesitated for a moment, standing there in just his towel, looking unsure.

“You… really want me to stay?” he asked quietly, voice small. “I mean… I don’t want to assume anything. If you’d rather I go home, I—”

You sat up a little, reaching for his hand.

“Relax, Satoru. I want you to stay,” you said softly but firmly.

His shoulders relaxed. A shy, beautiful smile spread across his face as he dropped the towel and slid into bed beside you.

For a long time, neither of you spoke. You just lay there, faces close, looking at each other in the dim light of your room.

Satoru’s blue eyes were soft, almost vulnerable as he studied your face. You reached up and brushed a strand of damp white hair away from his forehead.

Neither of you said anything more. You simply stayed like that — faces close, breathing slow and steady.

Well… you’ll figure the rest tomorrow, you thought, a small smile on your lips as sleep finally pulled you under.

Uggghhh. FINALLY!!!!

Reblogs are sooo appreciated part 9 (last one) coming soon ! masterlist

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[barbienextdoor]

18+ men who get desperate when you ride their face

He’s flat on his back, head hanging just off the edge of the bed so you can straddle his face properly. No pillow. No mercy. You sink down without warning, knees bracketing his ears, and the second your dripping cunt meets his mouth, he lets out a filthy, muffled moan that vibrates straight through your clit. “Fuck—yes,” he groans into you, words slurred and wet, tongue already pushing past your folds like he’s trying to crawl inside.

His hands clamp onto your ass, fingers digging in hard enough to leave prints, yanking you down until you’re smothering him. Nose buried in your slit, lips sealed around your clit, he’s sucking like he’s pulling your soul out through your pussy. You grind slowly at first, rolling your hips, smearing slick across his chin, his cheeks, the bridge of his nose. He whines, high and desperate, hips jerking up off the mattress, dick already leaking pre-cum in thick beads down his shaft because he’s too fucked-out to touch himself.

Every time you lift just enough for him to breathe, he chases you, tongue lashing, trying to drag you back down. “Stay—fuck, stay on my face,” he begs, voice wrecked and garbled against your cunt. “Use me—ride it, baby, please—” Spit and your arousal drip down his temples, into his hair, pooling on the sheets. He’s a mess: cheeks flushed dark red, eyes rolling back behind fluttering lids, tears leaking from the corners because he’s so overwhelmed he can barely breathe.

You pick up the pace, fucking his tongue now, grinding your clit hard against the bridge of his nose while his lips suck sloppy and obscene. The wet, filthy sounds fill the room: your slick smacking against his face, his choked moans, the creak of the bed frame as he bucks uselessly beneath you. He comes first, untouched. Hips snapping up, dick pulsing, thick ropes of cum shooting across his stomach and chest while he sobs into your pussy. The vibration of his cries tips you over.

You grind down one last time, clit mashed against his tongue, and gush, hard, flooding his mouth, his chin, dripping down his throat until he’s choking on it and still trying to swallow every drop like it’s the only thing keeping him alive. When you finally lift off, thighs shaking, he gasps, ragged, wrecked, face glistening, lips swollen, hair soaked with you. He looks up through wet lashes, chest heaving, cum still streaked across his abs. “Again,” he croaks, voice hoarse, already reaching to pull you back down. “Please, fuck—don’t stop. I can take more. I want to drown in you.”

[tays-writing]

Where he draws the line | p1

Satoru Gojo x Reader

Being loved by the strongest is complicated. Being married to him as a sorcerer from a despised clan makes you dangerous. But no one is foolish enough to cross the line of an utterly devoted man, right?

cr: @_3aem on X

CW / Fic tags: NSFW. Married couple/Established relationship. Plot & Smut. Possessiveness. Vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, praise kink, creampie, oral sex (f and m rec), inappropiate use of cursed technique, fluff, hurt/comfort. Satoru Gojo goes insane

The first week after the wedding, Satoru Gojo stopped pretending he had any self-control. Not that he’d had much to begin with. But now? Now he didn’t even try. 

He was fairly certain he was going to live in a permanent honeymoon state forever. And honestly, he wasn’t complaining.

“You’re being obnoxious” you murmured under your breath, keeping your tone carefully neutral as he leaned down behind you, his chin settling comfortably on your shoulder. His weight was lazy, both arms draped around your waist like he’d decided this was his new default position.

“Mmm-no,” he corrected lightly, breath warm against your ear “I’m being a married man” 

You kept your eyes forward, expression composed, because the second you acknowledged the fact that Satoru Gojo was practically purring into your neck in front of the entire staff, you would lose whatever dignity you still had left.

You met him at Jujutsu High, back when you were nothing more than two stupid teenagers with too much power and even less sense. It hadn’t been instant. Not even close.

You were a year younger, and he behaved like he owned the place—which, in hindsight, maybe he did. Still, that wasn’t the point.

Then came shared missions. Long nights. Close calls. Feelings you hadn’t planned on—feelings Satoru had made very sure would take root.

And now here you were. Married. Seven days in.

He squeezed your waist once — absentmindedly possessive. You pinched his wrist in retaliation.

He grinned. You didn’t need to see it, you could hear it in the way his shoulders shifted, smug and pleased with himself.

You finally slipped out of his hold just enough to turn and look at him.

“Didn’t you have a class to teach or something?”

“Hm?” one hand came up to his chin, thoughtful “I don’t th—”

“Sensei.” Megumi’s voice cut in before he could finish — flat, cold, and deeply unimpressed. 

He stood a few feet away, posture straight, expression carved from stone as always. His dark eyes are fixed squarely on Gojo’s face.

“Stop behaving like a teenager and come teach the class” he says evenly. “We’re waiting.”

There’s a beat of silence.

Slowly, you look up at your husband.

Megumi’s gaze shifted then — just slightly — and softened when it landed on you.

“Mrs. Gojo” he says, bowing his head a fraction.

“In my defense,” Satoru says thoughtfully, “I forgot.”

Megumi exhaled through his nose.

“You didn’t forget,” he replied flatly. “You ignored it.”

Satoru grinned, shameless.

“Details”

Megumi looked like he was reconsidering every life decision that led him here.

“Sensei” he said again, warning creeping into his tone.

You stepped back, folding your arms. “Go. Teach.”

Satoru sighed like he’d been asked to endure something truly unbearable — but before moving, he leaned down and pressed a quick, warm peck to your lips.

Casual. Unapologetic. In front of Megumi.

“You’re doing that on purpose” you muttered

“Of course I am” Satoru replied brightly.

He finally stepped away, squeezing your hand once more. You smiled, shaking your head as you watched his broad back stroll off toward the exit without a care in the world.

“Let’s go, Megumiiii” he sing-songed as he passed his student.

But Megumi didn’t follow immediately.

He lingered by the doorway, posture relaxed, expression unreadable.

“Mrs. Gojo.”

You looked at him, resisting the urge to tell him he didn’t need to be so formal—neither you nor Satoru cared—but Megumi was endearingly respectful, so you let him have it.

“Megs” you answered, tilting your head.

“He’s worse lately.”

You blinked once. Then raised an eyebrow. “Worse?”

“More…” He hesitated, searching for the word. “…attached.”

A soft huff escaped you before you could stop it. “He’s always been attached.”

Megumi’s gaze dropped for half a second, then returned—sharp. Certain.

“This is different.”

The words settled heavier than they should have, and you didn’t answer right away.

He wasn’t wrong.

There was something different. Something that had crept in quietly beneath the teasing and theatrics, beneath the hands on your waist and the shameless affection.

Something denser. More deliberate. Protective, yes—but not playful. Watchful. Like he was constantly counting exits. Like he was listening for threats that hadn’t arrived yet.

You straightened without realizing it, shoulders squaring.

“Don’t worry,” you said, offering Megumi a small smile. “I’ll fix it.”

It was only half a joke.

You’d known Megumi since he was six years old—played with him, walked him to school, watched him grow. You knew him well enough to recognize concern when he buried it. And the last thing you wanted was for him to feel responsible for something that wasn’t his to carry.

He studied you for another second, then nodded once. Without another word, he turned and headed inside.

You stayed where you were.

And for just a split second—you felt it again.

That distant awareness.

Like someone, somewhere, was watching.

—

Nanami found you where he always did when your thoughts grew heavy.

A quiet corner of the campus, far enough from the main buildings that the noise faded into something distant. You’d started coming here years ago, back when you were still students—back when you and Nanami were simply classmates learning how to survive the system.

Same year. Same rank. Same expectations.

Your friendship had been built in silence, shared exhaustion, and the unspoken understanding of what it meant to be useful to the wrong people.

You were leaning against the railing when he approached, his glasses catching the late afternoon light before he removed them.

“You’re thinking too loudly” he said, resting his forearms beside yours against the cool metal.

That earned a quiet huff of a laugh. “That obvious?”

“With you?” he replied. “Yes.”

For a moment, neither of you spoke. Nanami didn’t push—he never did. He waited, patient as always.

He was the person you trusted most after Satoru. And right now, the only one you could speak to freely.

“I feel like the higher-ups have been circling,” you said eventually. “Not openly. Just… watching.”

Nanami turned his head slightly, jaw tightening almost imperceptibly.

“They’re unsettled.”

“Because of Satoru,” you said.

“Because of you” he corrected gently.

You closed your eyes for a moment.

Your technique had never been flashy—no explosions, no spatial distortions. Just amplification. Pure. Terrifying. When you touch another sorcerer, their attacks become absolute. No misfires. No wasted effort.

And power like that had always made people nervous.

Your clan had never fit neatly into jujutsu politics either. Old, but not obedient. Powerful, but uninterested in tradition for tradition’s sake. They’d refused council seats that demanded compliance. Refused marriages arranged for optics.

The higher-ups had done everything they could to keep the Ataru at the edges.

Until you married Satoru Gojo.

“An Ataru married a Gojo” Nanami said quietly. “And not just any Gojo —him. ” he paused only a fraction before adding “They won’t forgive that” 

“No” you murmured, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

Silence settled again—heavier this time.

“They don’t like that an Ataru now has access” Nanami continued

You nodded. 

You weren’t just married to a Gojo. You were married to Satoru. The strongest sorcerer alive. A man the higher-ups couldn’t control, punish, or touch.

But you?

You were reachable.

“I won’t abandon my clan,” you said. “And I won’t apologize for my marriage.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to.”

From somewhere deeper in the campus, Satoru’s voice carries—loud, dramatic, unmistakable.

Nanami’s gaze flicked briefly in that direction. When it returns to you, it lingers.

“He will protect you” he says. Not reassuring. Just stating a fact.

You don’t answer. But he notices the way your shoulders have gone rigid. The way your hand tightens against the railing, knuckles paling slightly. Your gaze drops, lashes lowering as your brow knits without you meaning to.

He exhales quietly. He has always been good at reading what people don’t say.

“You don’t want him to” he says after a moment.

The words catch you off guard. You look up at him, surprised —Because he’s right, and because you hadn’t let yourself put it into words yet.

Megumi’s voice echoes in your head. 

This is different.

Not the affection. Not the attention. The weight behind it. The way Satoru’s presence sharpens when he’s around you.

“He already carries enough,” you say “Just.. being who he is.”

You vaguely hear Nanami say your name, but it barely registers.

“I don’t want to be another thing he needs to get his hands dirty for.”

Nanami studies you for a second longer.

“If you can’t—or don’t want to—talk about it with him,” he says evenly, “at least trust me. Don’t fight this alone.”

You hesitate.

It’s brief. Barely noticeable. But it’s there.

“Thank you” you say quietly.

Nanami inclines his head once, accepting it without comment.

When you finally turn and walk back toward the building, your gaze drops to the ring on your finger.

Proof.

And the terrifying reminder of what Satoru Gojo is capable of when something matters to him.

Morning light poured in through the penthouse windows, catching on bare skin, rumpled silk sheets, and the solid weight of Satoru above you.

“Toru” you warned, already breathless, hands still tangled in his hair.

“Yes, wife?” he replied, lifting his head just enough to look at you, those devastatingly bright eyes fixed on your face from where he was settled between your ribs, completely unbothered.

He’d already fucked you as a good morning, and then decided you wouldn’t be escaping the bed. Or him.

“I have a meeting” you grumbled, palms pressing uselessly against his shoulders. He was all lean muscle and stubbornness. “If I’m late because my husband decided to be a menace before breakfast, I’m blaming you.”

“What are you talking about?” he said, shamelessly grinning “I’m having breakfast exactly right now.”

Then his tongue dragged in one slow, deliberate lick along your sternum.

“Four years together and I still can’t get enough” he murmured against your skin—and proved it a second later, shifting just enough to press himself into you. 

You gasped, before you could stop yourself, fingers tightening in his nape.

God. He was addictive.

And you’d known exactly what you were signing up for when you married him.

His mouth found your neck, warm and open, while one large hand slid down to your hip, fingers spreading possessively, grounding himself while keeping you still.

“Are you bored of me yet?” he murmured, grinding once more, a low sound slipping from his throat as his nose brushed your jaw.

This was the side of Satoru the world never saw—the raw, needy hunger of a man who spent his life being treated like a god and only felt human when he was tangled in your sheets. Infinity off. Blindfold gone. A small, fragile bubble where he was just a husband enjoying his wife.

“I could never” you breathed, caressing his cheek “But I have to go” 

He leaned into your touch before resting his forehead against yours, breath warm, familiar. For a moment, neither of you moved. Then—reluctantly—he eased back

“Just because it’s sexy,” he said, smirking, voice low and lazy “you going to work while I stay home playing housewife, begging you to stay.”

You snorted softly, thumb brushing along his jaw.

“That’s crazy. Anyone would think the Six Eyes user might actually have a lot of work to do.”

“Never heard that before” he replied smoothly, unfazed.

You laughed, the sound light, and tugged the robe closed as you finally stood. His eyes followed the movement with open appreciation, head tilting slightly like he was committing the image to memory.

You leaned down again, unable to help yourself, capturing his mouth in one last slow kiss. He responded instantly, hands coming up to your waist, pulling you closer like he still wasn’t done with you. 

“You’ll be late too” you warned lightly against his lips, half a tease, half genuine.

“I’m the strongest,” he said easily, mouth brushing yours again. “I can afford it.”

“Arrogant.”

“You married me anyway”

You sighed, forehead dropping briefly against his shoulder, smiling despite yourself.

“Can’t argue with that”

When you finally pulled away, you felt it—the warmth, the safety. The last uncomplicated moment of your day.

—

You’d already finished reading the folder by the time you spoke. The papers now lay closed on the desk between you and Yaga.

“A support assignment,” you said, eyes still on the folder.

Yaga remained quiet, hands folded on the desk.

“For a grade one sorcerer” you added, skepticism threading your voice.

You lifted your gaze.

“Why me?” The question lingered in the air for only a heartbeat before you shook your head once—a small, humorless motion.

“No,” you corrected yourself quietly. “Actually, I know why.”

Yaga didn’t interrupt. He simply waited, eyes steady, as if he already knew the shape your thoughts would take. As if he’d watched you learn to trace them years ago.

“My cursed technique almost guarantees success for any sorcerer’s strike” you continued, almost absentmindedly. 

Yaga didn’t react. He didn’t need to—you’d had this conversation in pieces years ago. He had been the one to help you understand it in the first place—back when you were still clumsy with your cursed energy

“But it’s most effective when paired with lower-grade sorcerers,” you continued. “It corrects their cursed energy output. It removes the margin for failure.”

You paused, fingers curling slightly against the arm of the chair.

“With Nanami,” you went on, more carefully, “there’s nothing to compensate for. He’s more than capable of handling this alone.”

Silence settled between you—heavy, but not uncomfortable.

“Not only that,” you added, because accuracy mattered, “I’d be a nuisance. This assignment doesn’t require me.”

“I know,” he said.

Two words. Flat. Honest.

“The order came with specific instructions,” he continued. “They requested a sorcerer.”

A pause.

“By name.”

Your jaw tightened, just slightly. It was a reaction you didn’t bother hiding. It wasn’t a surprise for either of you.

“The mission is in a few days. I can’t cancel it or alter the assignment” Yaga said. “But I can make sure you’re not walking in blind.”

You looked down at the folder again, though there was nothing new to see. You hesitated—just barely—before speaking.

“They think they’re subtle,” you said. “But this doesn’t look procedural.”

“That’s exactly why I’m worried,” Yaga replied. You understood immediately what he meant.

“I don’t want Satoru to know” you said, voice low but steady. “I don’t want him intervening.”

A breath.

“Please.”

He studied you for a long moment—not as your principal, not as your superior, but as someone who had watched you grow from a reckless first-year into something far more dangerous. And far more exposed.

“You’re asking me to withhold information that concerns you from Satoru Gojo” he said evenly. “Are you aware of that?”

“I’m asking you to trust me,” you replied.

Another pause.

“And I do,” Yaga said at last.

The words weren’t light. They carried responsibility.

“But you won’t underestimate them,” he continued. “If anything changes—”

“If this stops being manageable—”

“I’ll tell you,” you said immediately. No hesitation.

He studied you a moment longer, searching for cracks that weren’t there. Then he nodded once.

“Good.”

The meeting ended.

But the quiet understanding that something had begun moving—carefully, deliberately—whether any of you liked it or not, lingered long after.

—

You rested two fingers against Inumaki’s shoulder—just long enough for your ritual to take hold—then stepped back.

You’d been working like this for weeks. Inumaki’s technique had always been particularly brutal on himself; every command exacted a price, every word tore something from his own body. Precision mattered. Control mattered. And today—finally—it held.

He inhaled.

“Blast away.”

The command detonated through the training grounds with surgical accuracy. No backlash. Nothing wasted. Nothing misaligned.

When it was over, Inumaki’s hand flew to his throat on instinct.

Then he froze.

No pain. No tearing burn.

He looked at you, eyes wide, and relief washed over his expression—soft, unguarded.

“Salmon?” you said, smirking as you spoke his language.

“Salmon” he replied, cheeks faintly flushed.

You laughed softly. “Perfect. Go rest.”

He bowed quickly, a little clumsy with excitement, before hurrying off toward the dorms.

You watched him go, warmth settling in your chest—quiet pride, simple and deeply satisfying. Beyond exorcising curses, moments like this were exactly why you stayed. Why you kept doing this job.

Your phone rang, the sound cutting cleanly through the calm you hadn’t realized you were holding onto.

Nanami’s name lit up the screen. You closed your eyes for a brief second before answering.

“I was informed this morning,” he said once you picked up, skipping pleasantries entirely, “that your name was added to my upcoming assignment.”

You knew that tone. Years of friendship had taught you how to recognize when his anger was carefully restrained.

You turned slightly, lowering your voice out of habit, even though no one else was close enough to hear.

“Yeah,” you said. “I figured you’d find out.”

“This isn’t standard procedure,” Nanami continued. “They know very well I don’t need an amplifier.”

You exhaled through your nose.

“I’ll go. They want me there” you said, already anticipating where this was headed. “I’m not going to disappear. I can fight. I can exorcise. I can handle myself.”

“I’m aware.”

“For them, it’s a win either way,” you went on “They’ll discredit me if I don’t do my job well—call it inefficiency—even when they know they’re sending me to a mission I’m not needed in the first place. And on the other hand,” you added, more bitterly “they get the chance to see me hurt.”

“It’s not fair. And I won’t let—”

“I want you to treat me like I’m not there” you cut in.

Nanami went quiet.

“If you prioritize me,” you continued, firmer now “if you adjust your movements or your decisions because of me—then they get exactly what they want.”

A long breath came through the line.

“You understand” Nanami said slowly “that the moments you’re amplifying me, you won’t be able to defend yourself.”

“I do.”

“And you’re still intending to amplify me,” he went on, voice tight, “while asking me not to cover you.”

A pause.

“Yes.”

Another beat of silence.

“If I’m going,” you said quietly, resolute “then I’m going to do my job.”

Two days had passed since your meeting with Yaga and the call with Nanami.

Two days during which you had tried—really tried—not to let the conversation replay itself in endless loops inside your head.

You buried yourself in routine. Morning classes. Stacks of mission reports waiting for your signature. Faculty meetings where the same three voices dominated the room while everyone else nodded and pretended to take notes. Familiar motions. Predictable rhythms. Things you could control.

That morning, you had finally spoken to Satoru about the upcoming mission.

You had left out the part where your name appeared on the support roster—not because anyone needed your particular skill set, but because someone had requested you specifically. You omitted the detail that you’d be supporting Nanami unnecessarily, assigned to a role that didn’t actually require you.

On paper, it was clean.

In reality, you knew exactly how it would look through your husband’s eyes. And you knew he would be right.

I don’t want him to be another thing he needs to get his hands dirty for.

You had said those words to Nanami without hesitation. And you had meant them.

Still did.

By the time the sky began to dim into early evening, exhaustion had settled into your bones. It was almost six when you finally left the building, mentally listing the groceries you still needed to pick up before heading home.

You were halfway when a figure detached itself from the covered walkway.

“Mrs. Ataru.”

You stopped, and slowly turned.

You recognized the intermediary immediately—one of the elders who never quite reached the inner circle but carried their messages with almost religious precision. 

You offered a courteous nod and ignored the deliberate omission of your married name. They had all done it at first. Some still did. A quiet, stubborn refusal. A reminder that, in their eyes, Ataru's blood still ran in your veins and that was all that mattered.

“We will be requiring a formal review,” he continued, tone measured and unhurried, “of your operational role moving forward.”

You tilted your head just enough to signal curiosity rather than alarm.

“My role?”

“Your marriage constitutes a significant shift in existing power alignments.”

Ah.

You understood immediately. Satoru and you were expecting it since the wedding announcements went out. 

Of course they were going to keep an eye on you. To make sure an Ataru who now belonged to the Gojo family didn’t interfere more than expected. To keep a rein on an amplifier who had married the strongest sorcerer alive—a man who already stood at the pinnacle of power without any amplification at all.

“You’re concerned about a conflict of interest,” you said calmly, almost conversationally.

The elder didn’t deny it. He inclined his head a fraction—confirmation and dismissal wrapped into one small gesture.

“We believe a reassessment is appropriate.”

You felt the shift before you saw him.

Not a sound. Not a footstep. Just a sudden density in the air behind you, like the atmosphere itself had thickened.

Satoru stood several paces away, white hair catching the dying light, dark glasses firmly in place. He had clearly been on his way home.

Now every line of him radiated something lethal, leashed only because he want it to be. The elder clearly stiffened at the new unexpected presence

“My values and my judgment haven’t changed.” you said firmly

The elder recovered quickly, though his eyes flicked once to Satoru before returning to you.

“That remains to be evaluated.”

Satoru laughed, stepping closer with lazy confidence.

“Evaluate me instead,” he suggested lightly, as if recommending a restaurant. “Since I’m the conflict, clearly.”

“We are well aware of your position and capabilities, Gojo.”

“Are you?”

Two words. The Infinity flexed. The courtyard lanterns flickered once, as if the bulbs had momentarily forgotten how electricity worked.

You moved without thinking, your hand lifting toward Satoru’s chest—right over his heart. Infinity stopped you just short of contact, but it didn’t matter. The message landed anyway.

He looked down at your hand first. Then at your face.

He knew somewhere beyond the quiet campus, behind closed doors and carefully measured conversations, men with too much authority began calculating risk. But here, in the fading light, with his attention wholly—dangerously—focused on you, Satoru Gojo wasn’t thinking about politics. He was thinking about you, and the catastrophic mistake of anyone who mistook you for a weakness.

So he smiled again—slow and deliberate— and let the pressure ease.

“Of course,” he said brightly, voice slipping back into its familiar lightness. “Oversight. Committees. Reports. Love that for us.”

The elder bowed stiffly—more reflex than respect—and retreated down the walkway, his measured pace doing very little to disguise how quickly he wanted distance between himself and the two of you.

You waited until the sound of his footsteps disappeared completely.

Only then did you lower your hand.

“Don’t.” 

The word left your mouth softer than you intended, but it didn’t tremble.

“Don’t what?” he asked.

“Escalate.”

The courtyard felt too open all of a sudden. Too exposed. You were aware—acutely—of how easily he could turn this into something irreversible. How thin the line was between restraint and spectacle.

You knew, and you had expected it. The scrutiny. The political recalibration. The quiet attempts at pressure disguised as procedure. You had known they would try to test you. Test him. Test the space between you.

You had walked into it willingly.

“They’re underestimating you.”

You held his gaze.

“And you?” you asked softly. “Are you underestimating me?”

You asked because it mattered. You weren’t shrinking. You weren’t flinching. And you needed to know that he saw that.

His eyes sharpened immediately.

“Never.”

You stepped closer—closing the last of the distance so there was no ambiguity left between you.

“This is manageable,” you said. “It’s annoying. It’s intrusive. But it’s manageable.”

He studied you for a long moment. The way he sometimes looked at unfamiliar cursed techniques right before dismantling them

“You knew this would happen,” he said quietly.

“Yes.” you answered without hesitation.

“And you married me anyway.”

There it was. A confirmation.

“Yes”

Something flickered across his expression, and you barely had time to breathe before the world folded.

There was no warning—just the sudden, disorienting snap of space collapsing. The penthouse materialized in a blur of glass and twilight, and before your mind could catch up, Satoru had you pinned against the cool glass of the floor-to-ceiling window.

Tokyo glittered thousands of feet below—distant, irrelevant. All you could feel was the radiator heat of his body pressed flush against yours.

“Satoru—”

You really looked at him then. At the tight set of his jaw. At the sharp, dangerous focus behind the lenses of his glasses. At the way all that power narrowed until it was only you.

“What did we talk about,” you said breathlessly, “teleporting me home without warning?”

“Right now, I don’t care.” His voice dropped into a rough register that sent a sharp ache straight through you. “They don’t get to touch you.”

He still hadn’t used his hands. Just his weight. His chest rising and falling against yours.

“They don’t even get to look at you like you’re something they can put on a scale.”

“I handled it,” you said, pulse finally catching up. Your fingers trembled as you hooked them into his collar. “You saw that.”

“I saw a dead man walking,” he corrected. He leaned closer, mouth hovering inches from yours, breath warm—coffee and something rawer beneath it. “You were too polite. Too professional. You’re too good for them.”

“You don’t get to go feral preemptively,” you said, trying—and failing—to ground yourself.

His mouth curved into a sharp, dangerous smirk. “Feral?”

“Yes. I can see it building.”

You said it lightly. Almost teasing.

Inside, you were deadly serious.

He laughed under his breath.

“You have no idea how feral I am right now. Seeing them omit your name. Seeing them treat my wife like a line item in a budget.”

That was when he finally moved.

His hands came up—not to your waist, not yet—but to your wrists, pinning them above your head against the glass. The cold at your back and the furnace of him in front made your thoughts blur.

“You married a monster,” he murmured, nose tracing the line of your jaw.

“No,” you corrected, breath hitching as his mouth brushed sensitive skin beneath your ear. “I married a man.”

Something in him broke.

Just for a second.

Raw. Unguarded.

He pulled back enough to look at you, blue eyes burning brighter than any cursed energy—stripped of every shield he wore for the world. You felt the exact moment his control wavered.

His grip loosened.

You slid your hands free and cupped his face, lifting his glasses away.

“And I love that man so much it hurts,” you whispered, thumb brushing his lower lip. “So let me take care of you tonight, Satoru.”

His breath stuttered.

And even as your thoughts churned—the conversation with Yaga, the call with Nanami, the mission in which you had never truly been necessary—is this the right thing to do? Am I making this worse? Should I have handled things differently?—deep down, the truth was that you didn’t regret it.

You had chosen to protect him from one more thing that might demand blood.

You didn’t want this weight on his shoulders.

Didn’t want him thinking that marrying you had turned your life into a liability.

Didn’t want him carrying guilt for decisions you had made on your own.

If you could give him even a moment of peace before everything shifted—before the mission, before the scrutiny, before whatever came next—then maybe, just for tonight, that would be enough.

if you’re thinking “wait, didn’t you already post this?” no ❤️ you didn’t see anything. It's not on my masterlist🤫

reblogs are always appreciated!! <3 -> next part masterlist

[satorus-princess]

“uh… why is sensei doing push-ups?” yuji asks, when he, nobara, and megumi enter the classroom.

satoru’s pushing himself up and down with one hand because, according to you, normal push-ups weren’t enough. but even then, he’s barely breaking a sweat. and he’s grinning, while you stand over him, watching with your arms crossed.

his uniform jacket is folded over the back of a chair, leaving him in his compression shirt, arm bulging and back tensing with each lift and fall of his body.

“i upset my-- hah beautiful, smart-- hah strong, gorgeous, perfect wife,” he pants, “punishment fits the crime.”

he really is right where he wants to be.

megumi doesn’t even bat an eye - this was the least unusual thing that you and satoru do. he slides into a chair with a sigh.

“how many does he have to do?”

“a hundred,” you say. satoru lifts his head to look up at you, mouth parted, little pink hearts in his eyes peering at you over the rim of his glasses. “he’s on seventy-two.”

his grin widens. “you know, this isn’t a challenge for me. why don’t you sit on my back, sweetheart?”

you crouch down in front of him and his eyes light up. “i know what you want, and you don’t deserve my touch.” you push his head down so he’s facing the floor again, and he grunts when you press extra weight, forcing his body down. “only twenty-three left. you can do it, my love.”

if his heart wasn’t beating fast enough before, it definitely was now. especially with the saccharine tone you used at the end of your sentence.

god, was he down bad.

“… call us when you’re done,” megumi says, already out of the classroom.

silly thought inspired by this video HAHA can you tell he makes me a little a lot insane

[tays-writing]

!nerdjo x reader | part 4

Exam stress leads to a late night horny decision. Everything is going great, until the guy in the video starts sounding a little too familiar

part 1 here! . part 2 here! . part 3 here!

cr: 3vangel1ne_ on X

Play this.

-

By the time you arrived at Choso’s party, his house was already overflowing.

Bodies crowded every room, conversations blurred into laughter, red cups littered every available surface; and the air smelled like cheap perfume, vodka, and the unmistakable sweetness of someone smoking weed by the open door to the garden.

You'd already lost count after your second shot.

Maybe your third.

Shoko was talking to Choso beside you, animated as always, but the alcohol had turned her voice into little more than background noise.

Then the music shifted. The opening beat sent a ripple of cheers through the room. You barely noticed, until the lyrics started.

“I wanna watch you like a movie…”

Your fingers tightened around your cup. Not now.

“I wanna put you on the stage…”

You took another sip. Maybe the burn of the alcohol would be enough to keep that damn video from resurfacing every time the lyrics seemed determined to drag it back.

“I wanna know what you’d do to me…”

Apparently not. The universe had to be fucking with you.

“I wanna put you on the tape…”

The corner of your mouth twitched. Whoever had made the playlist had an awful sense of timing.

“Flashing red light, baby you’re a star…”

You lifted your cup for another drink, your eyes drifting absentmindedly across the room.

“Fuck me all night, show me who you are…”

Your eyes landed on a familiar face, and suddenly the music died.

“No fucking way” you whispered.

Satoru was leaning awkwardly against the far wall, towering over almost everyone around him, looking as though he’d somehow got lost on his way to the library.

A plain white T-shirt stretched across his broad shoulders, dark jeans hugging long legs that seemed unfairly endless. His white hair was still messy in that unintentionally perfect way, but something was different—

He wasn’t wearing his glasses. 

You’d never seen him without them before.

Under the pulsing red and blue lights, his eyes looked impossibly bright, scanning the room with the same restless uncertainty he always seemed to carry outside the safety of a classroom.

God.

The alcohol was making this so much worse.

He looked dangerously handsome.

And completely miserable.

Only then did you notice the blonde girl standing beside him, chatting easily with a small group of friends.

Satoru wasn’t saying much. His shoulders were stiff, his hands buried deep in his pockets, his smile polite but painfully strained. He looked like he was about to jump out of his own skin. Every few seconds his eyes drifted somewhere else, as though he were searching for an escape route.

The sight twisted something ugly inside your chest.

He definitely came here for her.

So why did he look like he wanted to be anywhere else?

“Oh… damn,” Shoko murmured, following your gaze “He cleans up nice.”

You didn’t answer. Instead, your eyes found Choso behind the kitchen counter, busy pouring another round of drinks.

“Choso” You called over the music, nodding toward the living room. “Do you know that guy? The really tall one with white hair?”

Choso glanced over, squinting through the crowd. “Oh, him? Not really” He shrugged “The blonde girl invited him—I think? They’re in the same class or something.”

Your chest tightened painfully. Of course. You’d known it before you’d even asked. He’d come because she invited him. That was why he was here, looking unfairly hot in a party setting he clearly didn’t belong in.

Jealousy burned hot and ugly in your stomach.

“Right” you muttered.

You reached for the nearest cup and downed it in one go. It tasted like fruit punch and regret, but it didn't matter. 

Shoko raised an eyebrow “You good?”

“Perfectly” you lied.

An hour later, you were properly drunk. You’d lost Shoko what felt like an eternity ago, and the air downstairs had become too thick—heavy with perfume, sweat, and a bass that hammered relentlessly against your temples.

You needed to get out.

Your feet ached inside heels that had long since become instruments of torture, carrying you away from the madness. You drifted through the crowded house, weaving between strangers with half-empty cups in their hands. Laughter blurred into conversations you couldn't quite make out. 

Your head felt pleasantly light.

Or maybe dangerously so.

As you climbed the stairs, the flashing lights faded behind you. The music that had swallowed the house only moments ago softened into a dull pulse, vibrating through the floorboards and echoing faintly against the walls.

The upstairs hallway was almost empty. A single lamp cast a warm glow over the wooden floor, leaving the far end swallowed in shadow.

You blinked once.

Twice.

Letting your eyes adjust.

And then you saw him.

Satoru was standing at the end of the hallway, leaning against the wall, half-swallowed by the darkness, his phone resting loosely in one hand. The pale glow of the screen washed over his face, tracing the line of his jaw and the curve of his neck.

Somehow, he looked even more beautiful than usual.

For a fleeting second, reality snapped back into focus. The precarious balance on your heels. The dull ache in the arches of your feet. The desperate need to stay upright.

Almost instinctively, your fingers found the hem of your skirt, tugging it down where it had ridden up against the back of your thighs—a clumsy, subconscious attempt to make yourself look at least a little more put together.

He came here for her.

And yet… He was alone. The girl who’d barely left his side downstairs was nowhere to be seen.

Your eyes lingered on the broad shoulders hidden beneath the plain white T-shirt, then drifted to the long fingers loosely curled around his phone before settling on the nervous way he shifted his weight against the wall.

He looked exactly the same as he always did.

Quiet. Awkward. Completely unaware of how beautiful he was.

Your curiosity curled hot in your stomach.

The version of Satoru you knew in daylight and the one you’d watched through a screen felt like two different people.

You were dying to know which one would look back at you if you got close enough.

Before your brain had the chance to catch up, your feet were already moving across the hallway, the sharp click of your heels breaking the silence.

“Hey.” 

Satoru startled so badly he nearly dropped his phone.

“Shit—”

He looked up, quickly locking the screen before slipping the phone into his pocket with practiced ease. The movement was almost too quick, too casual—the kind of I’m just standing here composure that would’ve been convincing if his ears hadn’t already started turning pink.

“Oh…” His eyebrows lifted. “Hi.”

A beat.

“…You’re here.”

You took another step toward him. The hallway suddenly felt much narrower.

“Didn’t expect to see you at a party.”

“Yeah, I…” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I don’t usually come to these.”

“But you came because she invited you.” you countered, the alcohol sharpening your edges

He blinked, visibly caught off guard by the accusation.

“I—”

You didn’t let him answer. 

Instead, you tilted your head, your gaze drifting over his face.

“You’re not wearing your glasses.”

You were close enough now to catch his scent—clean soap, something fresh and woody, and something underneath it that was unmistakably him.

His hand flew to his face almost on instinct.

“Oh. Yeah. I... I thought the contacts might be better for a party. Less likely to get knocked off or fogged up or… whatever.” He laughed nervously “I feel weird without them.”

You took another step. The height difference was staggering; he had to look down at you, and the way he did it—soft, shy—made your knees feel weak. You reached out, your fingers ghosting over his jaw, tracing the sharp line of his cheekbone. 

Satoru went completely still. His eyes darkened, pupils dilating until the icy blue was nearly swallowed by black.

“I like you better with the glasses,” you murmured, your eyes fixed on the place where your fingertips brushed his skin. “They make you look… smart. Cute.”

“You…” His voice cracked, a high, strained sound. He didn't pull away. Instead, he leaned into your touch as if he were trying to memorize the feeling. “You're…” He hesitated, struggling to find his voice. “...really close.”

“Does it bother you?” you challenged, your hand moving to the back of his neck, your thumb stroking the sensitive skin there. “Or is it that you’d rather be with someone else?”

He shivered, a visible tremor running through his broad shoulders. He looked down at your lips, his own parting slightly.

“N-no” he whispered.

You smiled, the expression a little tipsy and a whole lot dangerous. Your other hand came up, resting flat against his chest. The fabric of his shirt was soft, but the muscle beneath it was hard, and you could feel his heart hammering a frantic rhythm against your palm. You tilted your head back to meet his gaze, savoring the warmth radiating from him.

“You’re too tall,” you murmured, the words slipping out with a hunger you didn't bother to hide. “Always towering over everyone.”

Satoru swallowed hard, his Adam's apple bobbing. “I know. Sorry—I’m always in the way.” He tried for a light laugh, but it came out as a ragged exhale. His hands remained at his sides, fists clenched until the knuckles turned white, as if he were physically anchoring himself to the wall to keep from touching you. “You’re… you’re drunk, aren’t you?”

The question sounded like a desperate attempt to break whatever had settled between you, to remind himself of the boundaries that were rapidly dissolving. 

You didn't answer. Instead, you leaned in closer, your nose brushing against his collarbone as you inhaled deeply, letting his scent fill your lungs.

“You smell so good,” you whispered against his skin, almost drunk on it “God, why do you smell so good?”

You didn’t care anymore that you weren’t the girl he thought about when he recorded those videos. The alcohol had burned away every last bit of restraint.

“You’re so soft..” you breathed, dragging your lips slowly along the warm skin of his neck, savoring the feeling.

Without a second thought, you pressed a slow, lingering kiss right where his pulse was jumping wildly beneath your lips. 

He let out a soft, broken sound—half whimper, half sigh. It was the exact sound you’d heard a dozen times through your headphones, but hearing it now, feeling it vibrate against your mouth, was a visceral, jolting experience. The hallway felt like it was closing in, and the muffled music from the party below felt miles away. 

“You shouldn’t… I mean, you’re drunk, and I—” He whispered the words. But even as he spoke, he betrayed himself by tilting his head slightly, giving you more access to his neck.

You welcomed the invitation.

Your lips trailed lower, moving to the ridge of his collarbone. You dragged your tongue slowly across the bone in one long, teasing lick. Satoru shuddered violently, a pretty, needy moan escaping his throat.

“Fuck—why are you...” His breath hitched “Ahh—why are you doing this to me?”

You could feel him hard against your hip when you pressed closer, the thick outline unmistakable. Yet his hands remained glued to his sides, fists clenched, shaking with restraint.

One of your hands slid to the back of his neck, fingers threading into his soft white hair. You pulled him down slightly, making the height difference even more obvious, and latched your mouth onto the side of his neck again.

This time you kissed him open-mouthed, sucking gently on his skin. Satoru whimpered, the sound breaking beautifully as you sucked harder, determined to leave a mark.

“Please—” he breathed. “I can’t—”

He still wouldn’t touch you back. His arms stayed rigid at his sides, his hands clenching and unclenching like he was fighting a war with his own instincts.

You pulled back just enough to look up at him.

Satoru’s eyes were half-lidded, lashes fluttering, his lips parted as he tried to catch his breath. His cheeks were flushed a deep pink. It finally clicked in your hazy mind: he wasn’t touching you because he knew you were drunk. He was letting you use him however you wanted, but he refused to take advantage.

That realization might have been the hottest thing you had ever experienced in your life.

You leaned in slowly again, the height difference forcing you to stretch. Satoru’s eyes widened the moment your breath brushed his lips, impossibly surprised, almost disbelieving. He stared at you, pupils blown wide with shock and something much darker.

“What are y—”

You kissed him.

It started soft — just a gentle press of lips — but the second you felt the tiny, broken whimper vibrate against your mouth, something inside you snapped. You tilted your head and deepened the kiss, sliding your tongue along his bottom lip before pushing inside.

Satoru moaned into your mouth, the sound needy and desperate. His body trembled against yours, but his hands still stayed glued to his sides, shaking.

You kissed him harder, hungrier. Your tongue explored his mouth with lazy confidence, tasting him, teasing him, sucking on his tongue whenever he shyly tried to respond. Every little sound he made — those pretty, broken whimpers you had become addicted to — only made you more relentless.

One of your hands stayed at the back of his neck, fingers tangled in his soft white hair, while the other slowly slid down his chest. You felt every hard line of muscle beneath the thin fabric of his shirt, your palm gliding lower and lower until it stopped just above his belt.

You could feel how hard he was.

The thick, heavy length of his cock pressed insistently against your stomach, hot and unmistakable even through his pants. The same pretty cock you touched yourself to while watching him fall apart on camera. The realization made heat flood between your thighs.

The kiss turned wet and messy. Obscene sounds filled the quiet hallway as you devoured his mouth, biting his bottom lip gently before soothing it with your tongue. Satoru was shaking, breathing heavily through his nose, completely lost in the kiss but still refusing to touch you back.

God, he’s really not going to touch me.

He was letting you use his mouth, his body, his neck — whatever you wanted — while he held himself back because you were drunk.

It was infuriatingly respectful. And an absolute torture.

Just then, a voice echoed from downstairs.

“Hun? Are you up here?!”

Shoko.

Your heart jolted. You pulled back sharply, breathing hard, lips still tingling. For a second you just stared at him — at the mess you had made of him — and reality came crashing down like cold water.

Fuck. What did I just do?

Your hands were shaking. Your knees felt weak. The hallway suddenly felt too bright, too quiet. You took a shaky step back, almost losing your balance on your heels.

“I—” you whispered, voice cracking.

You couldn’t even finish the sentence.

You gave him one last frantic look — his messy white hair, swollen glossy lips, and the faint red marks you had left on his neck — before turning around. You walked away quickly, almost stumbling down the hallway, your heart hammering wildly in your chest.

You didn’t look back.

Just as you disappeared down the stairs, Satoru’s head fell back against the wall with a quiet thud, eyes squeezed shut. A second later, his legs gave out and he slowly slid down the wall until he was sitting on the floor, completely ruined.

He didn’t know what was more pathetic: his trembling hands, the frantic drum of his heart, or the warm, humiliating mess in his pants.

yep. i'm basically torturing everyone: reader, Satoru, you and me.

Reblogs are sooo appreciated ✨

part 5 coming soon ! masterlist

taglist: @butterbeanandsparkleface @seungkwansflower @ninjaturtletoes @krispy7akay @wiserion @aaudreys @chosslut @erideight @quanxistoelicker @stuckinadream0 @nanahach1 @carcelswaifu @c4ndyyy @cridtiins @cupidslie @suguphile @msblyshie @ashtraaay @lovvsp @itsjustmesofiedk @cutiepie208 @gojodotexe @shinobui @emeraldlegacyobserver @ifartmatcha @sparklefarts214 @kissmekissmecure @di1f-lover @mafezinhasworld @skylaryippee @toru-saki @kun4ril @marsieonist @s3werslvtt @affinityblues @bat-brainzzz @ariilovesmoney @trizymiia @looha @megsbows @srslyoceans @whatsernamekei @gojoful @zlinguss @gabbiepickle @tootyallfarty @boomboom-tanjiro2019 @hauntedbyink @dasiybynight @winniethepoohjusttookapooh

The original taglist is full, but I'd be happy to add new requests to the overflow taglist (37/50) Thank you!! :)

[hidingwhere]

༯ birthday sex with Gojo

Gojo Satoru didn’t believe in just one round during your birthday, no, he was a firm believer of making you have orgasms all day, sometimes not in the most appropriate places.

The day starts with his head in between your thighs, morning sun filtering through the curtains and casting a yellow glow over your boyfriend’s white hair. His long, slender fingers grip the skin of your thighs roughly as he dives into your sweet pussy, head rolling back as you moan and whimper above him.

The second time, it’s in the backseat of his car. You want to visit a garden centre on your birthday? Sure, as long as he can bounce you on his cock in a quiet area of the car park afterwards. You’re far too cock drunk to notice or even care if the car is rocking violently each time he slams you down onto his deliciously thick length.

The third time, two of his fingers are splitting you open in your friend’s bathroom. You should’ve known that Gojo would try this when you said your friends had invited you round for the afternoon with an open invitation for your boyfriend too.

“Satoru,” you begin breathlessly, legs involuntarily spreading wider. “Someone could hear.”

He presses open mouthed kisses along your neck, nipping at your skin playfully. “Then let them. Let them see how well you’re being treated on your special day.”

You can’t contain your moan as his fingers plunge deeper, reaching that sweet spot that made your legs shake. “You’ve already-mm-treated me twice.”

“Not enough for me, baby. I won’t let you sleep until I’ve given you at least six orgasms today.”

You barely register his words as your eyes roll back, familiar feeling building in your lower stomach as you thrust helplessly against his palm.

The fourth time happens on the couch, right after getting home and unable to even get a word out before Gojo is pushing you down, fingers already straying to your underwear. Somehow, you end up face down ass up, drooling over one of your favourite cushions as Satoru pounds into you again and again, causing the nastiest of moans to spill from your mouth.

The fifth and sixth orgasm happens during the same event, in a fancy restaurant. Apparently, Gojo had no awareness of his surroundings even in one of the most prestigious places possible. He apparently also thinks it’s funny to rub the sole of his shoe over your clothed pussy during dinner until you finish, hands gripping your cutlery in a desperate attempt to look composed. And then to top it all off, he fucks you again in his car, the passenger seat now, one hand firmly wrapped around your neck so you don’t accidentally turn your head and notice how everyone can see the two of you this time.

[nezuscribe]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐦

pairing: gojo satoru x fem!reader

summary: two years had passed since you first met gojo satoru, and it was two years of having an agonizingly one-sided crush on the white-haired genius. for the most part, you were okay with keeping it down and acting like the nights you spent fantasizing about what it would be like to be his were normal. you were fine keeping it hidden until something between the two of you shifts, and you're left wondering if this crush you have on him is truly as delirious as you think.

genre: 18+, nerdjo, slow burn, angst + happy ending (duh), fluff, eventual smut (nerdjo being a munch), some mention of insecurities but nothing major

word count: 33k (oops)

note: nerdjo bu set in oxford! art credit! @to00fu

jjk masterlist

It began at one of the English department get-togethers. 

Two years ago, when you felt like you had to come to every single event in the hopes of striking expeditious luck at one of them. And it’s not that you particularly disliked these events, but they weren’t the first thing you’d think of when it came to how you’d prefer to spend your free time. 

The weather was just getting chilly enough where you’d rather stay in your dorm and wrap yourself in three blankets and a sweater, and the year had been dragging on long enough where you’d rather just talk about the wonders of Shakespeare and his sonnets in the confines of your next research paper and not with academics who made you feel inferior. 

You had been invited weeks in advance, and yet you still found yourself dreading being here, the more it led to it, and even more when you were in the thick of it. Awkward small-talk with students you’ve seen around briefly and stiff handshakes with male professors who think that they have better places to be were just mentally taxing, and you counted the seconds until it was all over. 

Thankfully, it was busy enough that you could slip into the background without many people even noticing you were there, but not so crowded that you could just slip away entirely without somebody asking where the great Dr. Howard’s research assistant had gone. And anyways, it wasn’t too horrible. You had taken to silently recounting Othello in your mind moments before everything changed. 

There was a small tap on your shoulder. It startled you at first, and you looked around in your small corner to see a man waiting patiently behind you, a sheepish look on his face as you tried to gather yourself up. 

“I’m sorry,” he stammered, and you blinked out of your stupor as you tried to recall in your brain if you had met him before to save yourself from the embarrassment of him having to re-introduce himself, “I didn’t mean to surprise you.” 

He looked familiar. His eyes were a deep amethyst, his smile was soft and kind. His dark and shaggy hair was tied behind his head in a small bun, and his ears were adorned with multiple piercings. Although many at Oxford, especially the men, tried to appear as blank as usual, he seemed apt and content with going against the stuffy and old notions. 

You must have seemed confused because the man stuttered as he introduced himself. 

“I’m Suguru,” he restarted, his hand leaving his side as he extended it to shake yours, “I think we had the same English survey course last semester.” 

Your confusion melted away into a wide smile as you shook his hand, his own eyes crinkling around the edges as he grinned back, letting out a breath of relief as you nodded insistently, shaking your head at your own self. 

“Right, right, Suguru! I remember you!” You exclaimed, setting your cup down to the side as you watched him tuck a strand of loose hair behind his ear, “You sat a little bit in front of me, right?” 

His head ducked down momentarily as he chukked, putting his hands in his pants pockets as he nodded. 

“I did,” he chuckled slightly, “Right in the line of fire for when Howard needed to pick on someone.” 

Your lips quirk up slightly as you nod, remembering how the professor you work for now used to terrorize your class and quiz random students on particular syllables and grammatical imperfections in the reading they were supposed to have done. 

The class was small, as were most major-specific courses you were taking. Although you didn’t have many of your friends in the class, you had gotten a good sense of who was in there and who Dr. Howard preferred to pick on. Suguru, for the most part, did the reading and did his work, so he came out unscathed compared to some of the other students. He sat near the front with some of his own friends, and you had talked to him in passing a couple of times when the class as a whole would band together to compare comments on assignments. He was kind, from what you remembered, which is probably why you felt your shoulders growing less tense the more you two talked. 

“That’s her style,” you say, shrugging as you fiddle with your fingers. “It took a while to get used to it,” you admit. Suguru rolls his eyes at your humility, remembering clearly just how much Dr. Howard favored you, but he doesn’t say anything as he lets you continue, “I don’t know if you’ve had Creemer yet, but he’s worse with his cold calls and isn’t half as nice.” 

“I have him right now for rhetoric and grammar,” he said with a sigh, shaking his head in dismay, “He’s…sadistic, I think.”

You giggle, nodding feverishly at the statement as you recall your past couple of classes with the hellish professor, an infamous name for many English majors and someone that you try to avoid at all costs if possible. 

The party, or gathering, as it said on the invitation, drones on in the background as you look around to see if anybody is looking in your direction. Most of the time, you can do what you want, but seeing that Dr. Howard had warned you before tonight that somebody from the department might want to swarm you to ask questions that you most likely didn’t have answers to, had put you on edge. 

“Are you enjoying yourself?” He asked, motioning to the rest of the people with a knowing glint as you politely smile, shrugging your shoulders as your lips press tightly together. Whether it be your shy nature or how you preferred smaller crowds, it must’ve been evident on your face that you weren’t necessarily having the most amount of fun. 

“I am,” you answer, wincing at the way your voice sounded warbled, “I’m trying to make the most of these opportunities, I guess.” 

Suguru’s head dipped in understanding, taking a sip of his drink as he bit the inside of his cheek, leaning in slightly as he lowered his voice. 

“These things drag on for a bit, though, yeah? I’m feeling my fingers prune from how long I’ve held this glass.” 

You let out a sigh of relief, sharing the same sentiment as the two of you share a knowing look. 

“I…I, um, I heard that Howard chose you to research with her, though, right? That’s gotta be pretty cool,” Suguru asked after a beat, bringing you back to the conversation as his head tilted slightly, and you felt heat rush to your cheeks as you swallowed. He seemed kind, not asking the question bitterly as some other people have. 

You nodded again, trying to contain your smile as you leaned against the stone pillar next to you. Letting out a small hum, you swallow again, trying to scope out what sort of place he was coming from. 

“It is,” you answered, biting on the inside of your cheek as you were still reeling from being selected from such a wide pool of applicants and such a rigorous interview process to work on her next paper analyzing More’s work through a modern lens, “It’s…strenous, sometimes, but I’m having a lot of fun working with her,” you fidgeted with your fingers, “So yeah, it’s pretty cool.” You say sheepishly. 

Suguru smiled at your hidden enthusiasm, the tip of his boot nudging something on the ground. He went to usher you to continue before his eye caught something behind your shoulder, his eyebrows shooting upwards in surprise as his smile grew even wider, his hand raising in a wave. 

“Sorry,” he apologetically muttered, and you craned your neck around to see what it was, or rather who it was that Suguru had seen, “I think my friend just arrived.” 

That’s when you felt your breathing stop. 

The bustling group of students and faculty members almost seemed to part theatrically for the man walking towards the two of you, but you couldn’t even blame them. 

He stuck out like a sore thumb, with his icy white hair and strikingly beautiful eyes. His lengthy frame made him nearly a head taller than even the tallest man in the room, and his wide shoulders helped him wade through the bodies as he navigated to his friend. His face seemed stoic, bordering on bored, but you couldn’t help but widen your eyes in shock at seeing the most devastatingly gorgeous man to ever exist. He adjusted his glasses over the bridge of his nose, his lips moving in quiet apologies as he tried to move through the people without bumping into them. 

You suddenly became hyper-aware of the fact that it had been days since you had last had a good night's sleep and that the bags under your eyes were most likely even more evident in the dim lighting of the old hall, and how your sweater was lumpy from being shoved in the back of your closet for so long. You swallow thickly as Suguru quickly excused himself as he stepped away and walked a bit away to hug the stranger, exchanging some words with each other as you stood awkwardly to the side. 

You watched them silently as they talked for a little bit more before Suguru stepped away, his hand on his friend's back as he, for some horrifying reason, seemed to guide him towards where you were stiffly standing as the two of you made eye contact before you became aware of the way your eyeballs felt in your socket and how heavy your tongue was in your mouth. 

When Suguru finally pulled away from the modern-day Adonis, you felt like a creeper and a loner as you wondered whether or not to leave or stand in the corner while they talked, but ever the kind person that he was, Suguru led the man by the back to where the two of you were with a wide smile on his face. 

“Sorry about that,” Suguru abashedly apologized, chuckling deeply as he rubbed the back of his neck, “But this is my friend, Satoru,” he said brightly, pushing the man a little harshly towards you as you stared at him silently.

The man, Satoru, gives you a tight-lipped smile, nodding once in your direction as he looks around, looking uncomfortable and shifty. Suguru rolled his eyes, sighing deeply as he patted his friend's back. 

You grinned back, swallowing the spit in your mouth as you felt him stare at you once he was done looking at the room, your cheeks heating up. You felt his eyes drift over your outfit, at your posture, and the way your hands were clasped tightly together. This stranger assessed the way you swayed slightly, awkwardly, not knowing how to fill the silence as you tapped the tip of your battered shoes on the ground. When he was done, his chin lifted again, his stare lingering on your blinking face as you glanced between him and Suguru, waiting for somebody to say something before you imploded and left with the lingering scent of your vanilla body spray. 

Seeing that he was fine with checking you out, you took the time to do the same. He seemed like one of the generational students of the school, the ones whose parents and grandparents and cousins and siblings all came and went and made something important with their lives. They weren’t hard to detect, especially him, with his steamed jumper and his creased pants. His leather shoes were shining back at you, and though his hair was somewhat messy, it seemed to be classily messy, unlike what you and some other students would call freely messy.

“I force him to come to these things with me,” Suguru explained, but you could barely hear him over the rhythm of heartbeats in your ear as you tried to fly, appreciate the man a few feet in front of you, “Our friend Shoko sometimes comes, but she had things to do tonight.”

The man’s nose wrinkled ever so slightly, his brows drawing tightly together as he glanced at his friend with a look. 

“I had things to do too,” he muttered, his voice deep as you felt your heart stupidly tumble at the sounds. 

Suguru snorted, shaking his head as he shrugged indifferently. 

“Sure,” Suguru replied sarcastically and glanced at you, his brow slightly raised at the way you had gone silent, his lips quirking slightly when he noticed the way you couldn’t stop staring at his friend, not voicing anything as his hand on Satoru’s shoulder loosened, “Just act like you want to be here for twenty minutes, yeah?”

You bit your teeth into your cheek, a finger raising slightly as you pointed to the newcomer's face. 

“I like your glasses,” you said brightly, your smile gentle as you fidget with your own, watching the way his striking eyes moved over to you again, squinting slightly as his hand raised upwards, as if he had forgotten that his glasses were even there, “They frame your face really well.” Your head tilts a little as you try to place something, “Where’d you get them? If, if you don’t mind me asking. Mine is so old and dingy, and the rims are basically glued on, and I’ve only had them for a few years.” 

“Erm, well, thank you,” Satoru says stiffly, not used to the direct attention and compliments, his cheeks slightly dusted with pink as Suguru watches his friend struggle for words, taking the glasses off as he turns them to the side, trying to read the logo, “These are, erm, from Cartier. But I usually wear contacts, anyway.”

You let out a startled laugh, not a stranger to hearing students at this place don expensive items, but this being the first time you’ve seen one of them bashful about it. 

You nod, your smile still there, softer as you take in his slightly awkward nature and let him put the glasses back on before you continue. 

“Contacts are more practical,” you agree, even though you’ve always had a phobia of things touching your eyes and would never wear contacts unless somebody forced you, shrugging as you say, “But I’ve always appreciated the look of glasses.” 

Satoru gnaws on his lips, nodding quietly as Suguru starts talking about his friend's major (biochemistry, you came to find out), and how long they’ve known each other, but you could only feel your stupid feelings when Suguru stayed, his friend included, and talked with you for the rest of the evening. 

That was your sophomore year. 

Nearly two years passed after befriending Suguru alongside his small group. He introduced you to Shoko after that night, swearing up and down that the two of you were destined to be near each other. And we weren’t wrong, not in the slightest. You two girls bonded strangely fast, as if you were twin flames that were being fanned out. Suguru and Satoru seemed to mirror the two of you, but the group functioned as a whole, for the most part. You spent so many nights over at their dorms that you could walk around blindfolded and still find your way to the others with no issue. It was fun, it was what you had dreamt of for so long. It was something that you were fine with, more than content with, ending your university career in a couple of months. 

Well, everything for the most part, you could consider it as such if it wasn’t for your debilitating and soul-crushing feelings for the stranger you met that night. 

It’s been four semesters, and you still don’t think Gojo Satoru has a clue. Which, in all honesty, is for the better. 

Although his stoic nature spares nobody, it feels as though you're always on the worst end of it. With his lingering stares that seem to border on questioning why you were even there whenever he sees you, to the way he grows dim and quiet around you, it feels like you’re actively attempting to hurt yourself the more you fall in love with the little things you hadn’t noticed the day prior.

Even worse, you know deep down that such feelings are most likely, under this sun and every other universe, with most certainty and heavy grief, unrequited. 

But you’re fine keeping it down. 

You were fine until recently.

—

“I’m debating switching majors.” 

Shoko declared from the couch, her legs hanging off the side, knocking occasionally on your shoulders as you crane your neck back on the cushion form where you were seated on the ground to look at her upside down. 

“To what?” 

She shrugged, rubbing at her eyes as she held her neuroanatomy textbook in one hand, her phone in the other as she scrolled through the different majors Oxford offered, as if she wasn’t a semester away from graduating. 

“Film?” She read out, and you snorted, rolling your eyes at the prospect of Shoko going into film, “Hm…maybe art history?” 

“Gave up on the med school dream?” Suguru quips from the other side of the couch, knowing fully that Shoko was just going on another one of her tangents as she shifted slightly to shove him harshly with her socked foot. 

“I’m sure your counselor wouldn’t mind,” you reply, looking at her as she glares, her eyes falling back to her phone as she peers at the screen. She looked boredly a little bit before her eyes flitted upwards slightly, squinting as she read the new notification. 

“Satoru said he’s going to be here in a few minutes,” she muttered, reading the next message, “And that he wants you,” she nudged Suguru with her foot again to motion that it was him that Satoru was referencing in the text, “To move to your bed so that he can do his work on his side of the couch.” 

Suguru peeked up from his doom scrolling to look at Shoko, his eyes narrowed in a glare as he let out a huff of annoyance. 

“His side?” 

Shoko shrugged, her knee knocking on the side of your head as you knock it back, the book you were reading resting in your hands as you listened to Suguru mutter distastefully about how this was his dorm and that Satoru had no right claiming his couch, but you heard him shuffle to his feet nonetheless. 

You tried not to show any peek of interest when the infamous name was called out, but it was hard not to. It had been two grueling years of mulling over your childish crush, yet the sound of his name could still send pulses to your veins that you were sure were minor heart attacks. 

Because it was Gojo Satoru. You wanted to bang your head against the coffee table just hearing it. 

Truth be told, you weren’t a stranger to having crushes. It was normal, it was human. Or at least, that’s what you convinced yourself when you were sprawled out on your bed, staring blankly at the ceiling as you tried not to think about the way his fingers ever so slightly grazed your wrist when he handed you some chopsticks earlier at the restaurant. 

But your crushes came few and far between, and you preferred keeping it that way. Seeing that you were too terrified to ever admit them, and the few, very few times you have, they’ve backfired horrifically, you try not to catch feelings as much as possible. But there was something about Gojo, something beyond reason, that pulled you to him. 

At first, you bargained. You tried convincing yourself that it was just his appearance that was drawing you in, his suave looks that made people’s heads turn whenever he entered a room. But you have seen him at four in the morning with his old band tees (a sight that still made you swoon), with his hair crusted with glitter and his eyes pink with eyeshadow as Shoko attempted to put him in drag. Even then, he was insanely gorgeous, so you knew it had to be beyond that. 

When you had finally accepted that it was a mind-numbing and life-ending crush that you were feeling towards him, you finally gave in and decided to admire the tall brute from afar. It helped that the two of you had gotten somewhat closer over the past two years, but out of everyone in the group, he was the one you talked to the least. In your defense, he didn’t have much to say to anybody, and that was just his nature. He spent most of his time studying and researching, and the other time watching, observant as other people gossiped. It wasn’t his forte, and nobody pushed him. 

So you took in his quietness and his stoicism, appreciated his god-like looks and his overwhelming presence. That was fine. 

What made it even worse was that he was so unattainably perfect in other ways that your crush festered into something that made you scream into your pillows and throw your balls of clothes at the wall as you wallowed in self-pity. 

Everyone at this damned university was intelligent, and you had made amends with them early on. But you loved men who were smart, guys who could actually hold a page down and dissect it and make the most of it. And worst of all, Gojo Satoru was probably the most intellectual person you have ever met, and will ever meet. It seemed like his memory was photographic, his mind working twenty thousand times faster than the regular brain as he computed formulas and equations at speeds that you couldn’t fathom. He made biochemistry seem easy, something that you sometimes felt guilty for not pursuing. And sure, it didn’t help that you were on the other side with your texts about Russian classics and books diving deep into the restoration period, but even Shoko, who could rival Gojo at times, would begrudgingly admit under her breath just how stupidly genius he was. 

Therefore, when you put those things together, his charming looks, his bookish self, his brooding structure, and just everything else, it made him unattainably perfect.

And that’s when you get the man you’ve been hopelessly in love with since the moment you saw him at that wretched party that wasn’t a party. 

So, when Shoko read off his texts, there was good reason why she looked at the top of your head, a knowing look in her eyes as she playfully nudges you again, watching as you threw her a dark glare to just keep it down seeing that she was the only other soul who knew, despite you trying your best to hide it, about your feelings towards her other friend. 

“Did you hear that Toji is graduating a semester late?” Suguru asked, leaning back against his pillows, his long legs strewn along his bed as he chewed on some gum. 

You and Shoko both hummed, not looking up from your respective tasks, having found this information out weeks in advance. 

Suguru groaned in annoyance, his chest vibrating with the noise as you snorted, rolling your eyes as he threw a small pillow at your head. It bounced off the side of your face, but you didn’t look up from the page you were on, too engrossed to hear the door behind you click open and heavy footsteps suddenly thudding through the dorm. 

You shuffled against the couch, your back feeling stiff as you tried to get comfortable, not knowing that the man of your dreams was moving around somewhere behind you as he hung his coat up (vintage leather, something you found out as he grumbled about getting it wet when Shoko and Suguru insisted on walking in the rain once), kicked off his shoes, and slung his bag around as Shoko craned her neck to see what he was doing. 

“Hey,” Shoko called out, and your eyes widened slightly when you heard a familiar voice grunt back a tired greeting, trying not to look as your ears suddenly sharpened to pick up on the sound of him pulling on his sweatshirt as he rounded the couch, standing at the opposite end as he plopped his backpack on the cushions. 

You finally allowed yourself to peek over, your eyes following his figure upwards until they landed on his face, and your fists balled in frustration at how pretty he was even when he was simply existing. 

Gojo sent you a small, tight-lipped and courteous nod, polite and curt as he looked between you and Shoko, glancing back at the bed where Suguru was lying, his fingers barely lifting from his phone as he gave his childhood best friend a lazy three-fingered wave. 

“Why’re you here?” His blunt question was directed at Shoko, something that held no bite but mere wondering as he situated himself on the soft cushions, his large hands feeling around his bag as he opened up the zipper to get his laptop. 

“I thought that it was allowed,” Shoko replied dryly, “Apologies.” 

You chuckle softly, flipping the page, trying not to let his signature cologne distract you from the words in front of you. 

“How was your lab?” Suguru asked, sounding monotone as his thumb swiped on the screen. 

You watched as Gojo gave him a glare, his nose wrinkling, something he often did when he was frustrated but didn't want to ruin his outward appearance, and rubbed at his tired eyes. His hair was messy with goggle indents lining the upper half of his face. 

“An offense to my intelligence,” Gojo grumbled, his face illuminated by the glow of his laptop as he clicked around a little bit, “I can’t believe some people have made it this far.” 

You flipped another page, not fully having read the contents of the last one, but in an attempt to seem indifferent, tried to keep up with your regular reading pace as if anybody was keeping track. 

Watching as he riffles through his bag again, you know, almost like clockwork, what he’s going to pull out. His routine is one that you’ve familiarized yourself with despite your best judgment, and you know that what comes next are his glasses. 

Glasses are normal. You have your own pair that you only wear for lectures and outings, but forgo them for times like this because they sit a little too heavy on your nose. But his glasses are something else. 

They elevate his face ever so slightly, but so much so that it makes you want to keel over and scream. They accentuate his perfect nose with the perfect crook and his freckles that sometimes sit just beneath the frames. He looks even more dashing, if that was even possible, with the way he looks up sometimes, and the lenses make his eyes seem even more blue. 

He took them off for labs and put them somewhere safe. In moments like this, you were reminded of just how truly stunning this man really was. 

Gojo unfolded the two prongs, holding them up to a source of light as his nose wrinkled again. 

Smudges. 

You watch silently as he dives back into the bag, his long fingers searching through his pockets for something you knew you always kept on hand for yourself and deep down, for him. 

After a few seconds of not finding the microfiber cloth that you both silently cherished, you gave in, pulling your own bag towards you as you unzipped the smaller pocket, pulling it out stealthily and motioning for Shoko to hand it to Gojo. 

He took it, his face going so far to relax momentarily as he went to clean the lenses, his head nodding once in quiet appreciation in your direction as you allowed yourself a nod in return. 

Shoko looked at you with a raised brow, and you chose to hide behind your book.

“Was it Lainey?” Suguru asked, looking over at his friend, the name piquing your interest as you cast a quizzical look at Shoko, but she shrugged, watching Gojo as his expression soured. He handed you back your little cloth, muttering a thanks under his breath as his bitter gaze found Suguru, as if he was cursing him silently for bringing up the sensitive subject. 

“What do you think?” He grumbled out, his right eye almost twitching as his fingers stretched out, typing something quickly as Suguru huffed out a laugh, noting how you and Shoko were both confused, and his smile only grew. 

“You didn’t tell them?” Suguru asked, a gleam in his eyes as he shuffled to sit upwards, his back resting on the headboard, “Oh, this is class. Do you two know Lainey? Lainey Andrews?” 

You cast a look at Shoko, your lips pursing as your eyes squinted, trying to recall the familiar name. 

“The ginger?” Shoko asked, her head tilting to the side, her hair falling around her shoulder, “Pixie cut?” 

Suguru nodded, his shoulders raising as your brows furrowed before your mouth slightly fell open when your head bobbed quickly, snapping as you matched the face to the name. 

“Oh, Lainey!” You exclaimed, “She’s really pretty,” you added, remembering her bright green eyes and the spattered freckles that made her look like a painting, “She’s also crazy smart - she’s double majoring in bio and poli sci."

Shoko laughed softly under her breath, giving you a small look because this was somewhat typical of you to know random people, with nearly everyone on campus having had a conversation with you at some point during your four years here. 

Suguru raised a brow, clicking his tongue as he pointed his phone at Gojo, seeming like he was already anticipating one of his sly comments.  

“She’s also just crazy,” Gojo muttered, looking above his laptop, above his wispy lashes at you and then to Shoko, “She spent half of the lab playing with my hair.” 

Your book almost fell out of your hands as Shoko sat up with a barking out a stunned laugh, your hands mirroring each other as they flew to cover your mouths in shock, and Suguru nodded again, his eyes wide as he clicked his tongue. 

Another thing about Gojo? He hated being touched. Despised hugs, only suffered through quick handshakes, and shuddered at the thought of someone touching his face. You’ve seen the way he pulls back whenever someone approaches him with open arms, seen the way he tries to brush people off of him. He can tolerate Suguru and his insistent bear-hugs from time to time, can sometimes allow Shoko to swat a fly away from his face, and for some reason, doesn’t grumble whenever you try to fix his ties before events, but whenever a stranger or someone he isn’t close to attempts to touch him, he grows reclusive for the rest of the day.

“I told her to stop, too,” he adds, his big frame seeming to grow in frustration as he thinks back to it, “It was only after I had to shove her off that she got the hint. I forgot my disinfectant too, so I was just…” he shuddered, his eyes fluttering shut as he shifted uncomfortably, and you watched him let out a restrained exhale as he dropped it and went back to work.

But, after studying him for as long as you have, you know that he probably washed his hands and his face a couple of times after that. You know that he also wouldn’t feel complete without some sanitizing wipes and a good shower, so you do the closest thing to that and fish out a hand sanitizer from your bag, an item that you refused to move around without due to your own cleanly nature, which was ironically something else that you and Gojo silently shared, and passed it to him, knowing that he was probably itching till he was able to shower again.

Your friends sometimes joked that you had a Mary Poppins bag, but it came in handy for times like this. 

Gojo’s ears perked up at the sound of your rumaging, his eyes almost brightening at the sight of the hand sanitizer, and you pinched it between two fingers before throwing it his way, watching as he effortlessly caught it and began spraying his large palms with the lavender scent. 

“Thank you,” he mumbled again, his voice slightly losing the edge it had from before as he passed it back to you, and you smiled, nodding once before you zipped it back up. 

You tried to ignore the way Shoko was staring at you.

“Lucky us that we don’t have labs, huh?” Suguru called out, throwing another tiny pillow in your direction, but this time you dodged it, moving your head down slightly so that it would miss. You huff a bit, looking over at Suguru as he shrugged, winking as he went back to his phone. 

Suguru was another English major, the reason the two of you got familiar in the first place. He liked to say that the two of you balanced out Gojo and Shoko, but you just thought that it pushed you even further down the list of potential people your pathetic crush could be interested in. 

There were a couple of things that you had come to terms with if you were going to crush on him. One was that you had to know in full certainty that nothing was going to come from it. You weren’t going to risk the friendship, no matter how small, by going and confessing and having everything be messy. Two, was that you weren’t going to feel, or at least try not to feel, jealous if he entertained the idea of pursuing something with someone else. And three, was that Gojo Satoru was so incredibly picky when it came to potential partners, that it might be impossible for even the most amazing people to snag a chance. 

“I don’t know,” you mumbled, eyes squinting as you tried to make out what one of the characters was saying, “You didn’t have to do that project with Armie.” 

Suguru hummed, his brow raising as he thought back to your shared class and the project that paired you up with people you didn’t know, Suguru getting the better end of the stick while you were stuck with someone who insisted on plugging the project prompt into a generator. 

“Didn’t you report him?” Satoru asked, his eyes still trained on his work, but the question was now directed to you given the fact that he had sat in on a couple of your tirades in which you would drone on about how the boy was nearly about to graduate and still couldn’t cite sources when he, in one of his brief moments of providing comments, would reiterate to report it to the professor. 

You sank into your spot, giving him a suppressed look, one where your eyes met before you shared a glimpse with Suguru. Your friend rolled his eyes from across the room, shaking his head in annoyance as Satoru looked between the two of you. 

“She said that she didn’t want to ‘be a bitch’,” Suguru said, restating the words as his fingers move up and down in the air, quoting the statement you had said to him moments before you had to present the assignment in front of the class, shushing him as you pushed him away, insisting that even though you had done the entire project on your own, that it wasn’t worth the hassle to make a report with the professor and potentially have someone out for you, “I said otherwise, but she,” Suguru gave you a pointed look, “Said she’d cut my hair if I made it a ‘big deal’.”

Satoru’s eyes lingered on the side of your face, and you purposefully kept your head ducked and the book closer, so close that it was nearly touching your nose, as you tried to shield away their judging eyes in embarrassment. 

“You need to stop caring about what other people think,” Shoko said as she shoved you with her knee, this time just a little bit harder because she knows you and knows what you hide in the fear of making others think something of you that wasn’t good, “I really think your professor would’ve heard your case if you made it.”

You groaned, swatting at her leg with your book as you shuffled away, backing into another corner as you tried to readjust to the new position. 

“Yeah,” Suguru added, resting his phone momentarily on his chest, “I think it would help if you were more selfish.” 

You rolled your eyes, shaking your head at the prospect. 

“I just hate confrontation,” you murmur defensively, gnawing on your bottom lip as you flip a page, “And, plus…you have to give me some credit - at least I told him that he was being frustrating,” you say, pretending to ignore them, your eyes re-reading the same word over and over again until you were confident that they were going to drop this subject, this horse that they’ve beaten multiple times, one that ended with you assuring them that you were going to speak up more until it all looped back again to times like this.

“Speaking of confrontation, did you ever get a refund for that ticket?” 

There was a beat of silence before you let out a frustrated groan when Shoko reminded you of the one task you had forgotten to do in the past couple of days, your head falling to your knees as your palms jammed into your eyes. 

“No, oh my god, you’re so right,” your voice is muffled as you bookmark your page, your fists clenching at your own mistake as your eyes crack open, “Oh my god, I can’t believe I forgot to follow up on that!” 

Shoko chuckled, rolling her eyes as Suguru and Satoru shared a look, them now sharing confusion as you writhe on the floor at the thought of knowing you could’ve saved a couple of bucks had you not forgotten to call up the school of drama help center for accidentally buying an extra ticket to the showing of The Beggar’s Opera. And, seeing that it was Tuesday and just days before the theatre program, one that needed funds, was about to perform, the deadline for your refund was most likely up.

“So does that mean you need me to come with you next Saturday?” Shoko offered, her lips quirking up slightly as your head shot up, nodding quickly as your hands flew to hers, shaking them feverishly. 

“Would you? Would you really?” You ask, and her laughter grows, shoving you off playfully by pushing your forehead back to where you were sitting. 

“I’ll see what I can do,” she says with a sigh, winking at you before she goes back to her phone, and you settle back in your seat as you gnaw on your lips, thinking back to how on earth you could have possibly messed up so bad when you so usually only buy one ticket for yourself, but you push it aside, thankful that your dearest friend was at least going to make use of it. 

You, Suguru, and Shoko shared a small laugh and went on with the conversation, but you heard a low, deep noise, something only you could hear, as Suguru and Shoko returned to bickering about which major Shoko was best suited for. 

The sound made you glance up briefly, looking over the pages to see Gojo still staring at you, his lashes fluttering before he snapped back to it and went back to doing his work. 

Minutes turned into a few hours, and the room was filled with the occasional story and laughter, but mostly the four of you worked together on different assignments, sometimes looking up as you would recall something from the past couple of days that you were saving to tell them in person. 

It seemed like everything was going smoothly until Suguru got a notification on his phone, his face lighting up as he swiveled out of his bed, jumping onto the floor as he tugged his shoes on, not explaining anything as the three of you glanced up, waiting. 

“My food’s here,” he said over his shoulder, practically gleaming as he cocked his head in Shoko’s direction, “Come down with me, will you? I need some help.” 

You scoff, smiling to yourself as you try to imagine just how much food he had ordered, but careful not to be too loud because you knew he would be sharing it with you all after some choice complaints were heard. 

Shoko grumbles, but obliged, lifting up from the couch as she stretches, nudging you playing with the tip of her foot as she throws a pillow your way, walking towards Suguru as he holds the door open for her, the two of them calling out some brief goodbye as they head down to the lobby.

When the door clicks behind them, you’re suddenly aware of the fact that it’s only you and Satoru left, and you let your stare linger on the wall for a bit before you look away, suddenly sheepish when you catch his glance from his seat on the couch.

He clears his throat, eyes flickering from his screen to the book in your lap, the highlighters strewn around you, sticky notes sticking out from between the pages, and he points a finger at it. 

“What’re you reading?” 

Your brows raise slightly, and your chin ducks down to the book, and you sit up a little straighter as you place a bookmark in the middle of your page you lifting the cover, letting him read the cover as he adjusts his glasses over his eyes. 

“Oh,” he says, his voice holding a lithe of acknowledgement as he slowly sets his laptop to the side, shifting slightly closer, “I’ve read this, I think.” 

Your head tilts a little, lips quirking a little bit at the sides with a small smile as you look back at the cover.

“You’ve read The Norton Anthology, Volume C before?”

His mouth parts, closing it before he gapes at you, and your grin turns into a big smile, waving it away as you shake your head, shrugging at his stammering expression. He’s so cute when caught in a lie. 

“I’m only kidding,” you swear, setting your book down, your knees pulled towards your chest, arms wrapping around your legs, “I’m sure you’ve had to read something like this for one of your previous classes.” 

“You’re bothersome,” he murmurs, but his voice holds no bite as you let out another barking laugh, rolling your eyes as he tries not to smile, “I’m only trying to be polite.” 

You purse your lips together, giving him a questioning look as he shoots you one back. 

“I didn’t know politeness was in your artillery,” you quip, and he scoffs, moving his glasses upwards as he rubs at his tired eyes, resting backwards into the cushions as his legs part, and you try not to let your eyes linger on his thighs. 

“I have a reserve for choice people,” he says, opening his eyes back as he looks back at you, yawning as he moves on, “How was your presentation?” 

Your smile falters for a second as your stare turns questioning, chewing on your lips as it turns into something sweeter, something smitten because he’s asking about the presentation you had mentioned once in passing the last weekend you had hung out, stressing over your slides and sources, and trying to seem nonchalant as you finger traces little patterns on the floor. 

“It was good,” you tell him, trying not to seem too prideful as you murmur, “My professor said it was exactly what he was looking for.” 

His face shifts, no longer annoyed as you try not to appear bashful, but his teeth shine as his rosy cheeks pull upwards as he gives you one of those smiles that makes you feel warm and happy and giddy. 

“Yeah?” He asks, shifting a little bit as he waved his teasingness off, rolling your eyes as you groan, nodding exaggeratedly as you go back to organizing your highlighters and pens, but he seems intent on pushing this: “Didn’t you say it was the hardest assignment of the class?”

You look up at him from above your lashes, trying not to smile again as you shrug indifferently, done with arranging your stationery based on colors as your knees knock together, throwing a pillow his way that he effortlessly catches.

“I mean, everyone told me that it was really, really hard, so-” But you’re cut off by the door swinging open, and the two of you crane your necks around to see Shoko and Suguru arguing over something irrelevant, food nestled in their hands as they close the door behind them with a slam. 

They start telling you two about the delivery fee and the outrageousness that one of the containers had tipped over, but you’re still busy thinking about how Satoru remembered something so trivial, giving them quiet hums as they spread out the food on the small coffee table, and trying to act normal. 

Like you have for the past two years.

—

The week passed as it usually does, with papers, readings, and assignments that needed to be completed at an unmanageable rate. 

You had expected the usual and mundane things, and for the most part, that’s what came your way. Nights spent in each other's rooms as you finish up your work, spliced with moments where you would all talk, days filled with going to lectures and walking around campus till you found a quiet study spot. Things that you could predict and plan for. 

For the most part.

Another thing that your little group would occasionally do was meet up at the end of the week at one of the pubs around campus, most of them serving mediocre food and somewhat better drinks, and offer you all a time to reconvene after a usually stressful couple of days. 

The pub was small and quaint, but you enjoyed the warmth and laughter that muddled together to make the ambiance somewhat private. Either Suguru or Shoko would arrive there early and try to secure the usual spot at the booth near the end of the establishment, seeing that either of them didn’t have classes on Fridays, while the other three would meet up outside of Satoru’s biophysical chemistry class and walk there together.   

Which is why you found yourself back on that Friday, sitting next to Shoko, settling into your seat as she clambered in after you. Suguru almost pushes Satoru in, impatient to sit down and get back to talking, and you watch as the white-haired man sits in front of you, his hands clasped together as he stares at the wood-grain of the table. 

“How were classes?” Shoko finally asks, looking between you and Satoru as she takes a sip from her drink. 

You sigh, shrugging as your fingers play with the bottom of your cup, the condensation slipping down as you rub at your tired eyes. 

“Fine, I guess,” you say, drinking some water as you wipe at the corner of your lips, “My professor could’ve ended the class, like, twenty minutes earlier than he did.” 

She nods solemnly, patting your thigh in solidarity as she passes the bowl of crisps towards you, nudging you to take one to help settle your stomach after having back-to-back classes, knowing how hangry it made you.  

“Is this the professor who needs you to see a classical play?” Suguru asked, taking some of the snack as his arms crossed on top of the table, leaning in slightly as you licked some of the salt from your lips, nodding. 

“Yeah,” you heave another sigh, elbowing Shoko as you continue, “Which is why I’m seeing Beggar’s Opera next week. I mean, the theatre program did a couple of Shakespeare ones earlier this semester, but…ugh, I just can’t watch another performance of Romeo and Juliet.” You murmur with a groan, resting your chin on the palm of your hand as Suguru hums in agreement. 

“You don’t like Shakespeare?”

Your eyes shift over to the man in front of you who asked the question. 

Your brows furrow slightly in the middle, lips pulling into a small pout as you shake your head, playing with the ring of water your drink had left as you itch your nose, trying not to focus too hard on the pretty pink color on Gojo’s cheeks because of the slightly toasty feel of the room. 

“I do,” you say slugishly, “It’s just that when the only work of his that tends to be popular isn’t The Tempest, I get a little annoyed.” 

Suguru snorts, shaking his head as his fingers wag at you. 

“That’s not even nearly his best stuff,” he argues, and you roll your eyes, your head tilting badly in annoyance after knowing what this was going to lead to, “I can’t believe you still think that it outweighs Richard II.” 

Satoru and Shoko’s eyes bounce between you and your ink-haired friend. 

“I’d rather die on the hill of petty magic versus royal family drama,” You quip back, your brow slightly raised. 

Suguru huffed, shaking his head in dismay as he lightly shoved your foot underneath the table, a small smile on both your faces. 

“Is Tempest the one with the shipwreck?” Gojo asks, his head tilting slightly as his glasses lean on his nose bridge. You nod, grinning at the fact that someone in the group was able to identify such a classic piece of literary work. 

You open your mouth to agree, but Suguru beats you to it. 

“How do you know that?” He glances sideways at his friend, his brow raised in slight shock as Shoko snorts. 

Gojo shrugs, his elbows resting on the table as the fabric of his sweater tightens around his arms, making him look delectable and otherworldly. You have to tear your eyes away from it before it becomes too noticeable. 

“We went to the same secondary school,” Gojo argues, saying it as if it were the most obvious explanation in the world, “I paid attention…clearly more than others,” he adds under his breath, causing you to drop your hand to your mouth to hide the satisfied grin from when Suguru deflated in slight embarrassment. 

“Oh, speaking of blast from the past,” Shoko shuffles, looking at her phone screen as if suddenly remembering something, “Vi’s coming back for break.” 

You watch as Gojo and Suguru stop their silent bickering by messing with each other's stuff as they look up to Shoko. Suguru’s thin brow shoots upwards, his mouth turning into a surprised line as Gojo stares blankly, an unreadable expression on his face as you poke Shoko’s thigh, shaking your head in confusion. 

“Who?” You murmur, your eyes squinting as Shoko looks at you, her mouth slightly dropping as she also remembers that you didn’t grow up with them. 

“Vivienne March,” Suguru explains, beating someone once again to explain something because he could never hold onto a piece of information for longer than three seconds if he knows that somebody in his vicinity doesn’t know it, “She went to school with us for, what? Five, six years?” He looks between Gojo and Shoko, and they both nod, Shoko unlocking her phone as she goes to pull up the girl's instagram to show you what she looks like, “She’s his ex,” he murmurs as if secretly, pointing at his friend next to him as you feel something in your gut shift, but he clearly doesn’t tell because he leaves that point entirely. 

“But I thought she preferred to stay in America till her spring semester was over?” He asks, confused, waiting for you to be done looking, as he waits for Shoko to explain it. 

You take her phone gingerly, looking at the girl's account as you carefully click through her posts. You’re greeted with an aesthetic array of photos, some of her friends, some of her cat, and pretty pictures of old brick buildings and fall trees. But your eyebrows slowly move up your face when you see her. 

Your thumb swipes through each post as you see her stunning hair framing her face in freshly done curls, her eyes striking and delicate as she wanders around a bookstore. Her outfits are always perfectly curated, and her makeup delicately done to accentuate her already natural beauty in a way that makes a part of you, something you tried to bury and starve, twist with envy at the effortlessness of her perfection. 

“Guess she had a change of heart this year,” Shoko says, taking her phone back from your outstretched hand, turning it off as she placed it face down on the table, “She texted me this morning saying that she was ‘gonna be here for December and some of January and that she wanted to catch up.” 

“You would like her,” Suguru directs his attention back at you, his words matching the genuine smile on his face, “She’s super bright and bubbly. And she’s so funny. Oh, and she's, like, insanely smart. She graduated from Cambridge when she was nineteen, and she’s doing grad school at Harvard.” 

“Hmm, yeah,” Shoko hums, “I mean, she almost came here if she didn’t get the call from Harvard,” she nudges you with her shoulder, “But I don’t know how much he,” she points her eyes to Satoru, watching the way his mouth slightly parts at being called out, “Would’ve appreciated that, though.” 

He scoffs, his tongue poking at his cheek as he leans in slightly, his arms crossing the table as Suguru snickers. 

“I have no issue with Vivienne,” he argues, his brows pulling into a cute little frown, “She was just…”

“What?” Suguru juts in, Shoko scoffing a laugh next to you as Gojo only peers at him from the side of his eyes, “Madly in love with you? Was going to pick Oxford to be with you? And you were…what, days away from breaking up with her when she came sobbing to us that you have the emotional intelligence of a rock?”

Your eyes widen slightly, looking over at Shoko for confirmation, one she returns with a faint grin. Despite the sunken feeling in your heart, one that you often get whenever you are reminded of the fact that, unfortunately, literally everyone is also in love with Gojo Satoru, you have to control your face not to giggle at the statement. 

Gojo makes a noise deep in his throat, the tips of his ears slightly pink from the added attention. 

You swallow as you try to grapple with all this information. But, as always, the conversation moves on and you push everything back as you find yourself smiling once again, listening to how Suguru animatedly tells the story of how he bombed one of his essays because he forgot which citation format to use, and you try to not make it obvious how you’d peek over at Shoko now and then and see who it was that she was stalking, probably some girl from her class that she was plotting on. 

The music lolls on in the background, the pub getting more packed with students and tired workers, and you find yourself content with listening to your friends tell you about their week, taking small sips from your straw as you grin and laugh as poke Shoko’s thigh whenever a cute guy, devastatingly never as cute as Gojo, walks by the table, and she, gripping your knee whenever a girl her type flashes her a look from over their shoulders. 

“I think I’m wanted somewhere else at the moment,” she whispers, leaning closer to your ear as you follow her line of sight to a girl sitting at the bar, her long blonde hair thrown over her shoulder as she steals the occasional glance at your friend, “I’ll be back.” 

You giggle, pushing at her to go as she swats your hand away playfully, sending you a wink as you send one back, watching her go as Suguru and Gojo watch silently, sending each other knowing looks before Shoko disappears behind the other booths. 

“Well, if she’s going, might as well take this time to piss,” Suguru states, putting his hands on the wood as he hoists himself up, sending a cheeky little smile as he imitates Shoko’s sashay, “Don’t wait up.” 

You roll your eyes, trying not to watch him leave as if to draw out the silence that will inevitably follow, seeing that it’s just you and Gojo remaining. Your fingers play with your empty glass as you glance back to him, sending him a small smile as you feel chagrin already seeping into your veins.

He clears his throat, his eyes darting from your face to your arms, his tongue poking his cheek as he swallows. You wonder how much he’s dreading the awkward silence that has the possibility of ensuing.

“Water?” 

Your eyes squint at the sudden question, looking down to the long finger he has pointed at your glass, and you look back up at him, wondering if he was stating the obvious or if your feelings for him had made you delirious and unable to compute anything that comes out of his mouth. 

“Do you want some more water?” He explains, and you feel your cheeks heat again at your blunder, “I’m going up there to get a refill anyway.”

You nod gratefully, swallowing your feelings down as you glance up at him, handing him your empty glass with ice sloshing around as your smile wobbles. 

“I’d appreciate it, thank you,” your voice dips slightly as you grin stupidly the longer you look at his long lashes and his pink lips, somewhat glad that he was getting away so you could less opportunities to screw up, and you watch as his beautifully large hand wraps around the glass like it was nothing, sending you a small nod as he crouches slightly so that the overhanging light wouldn’t hit his head on the way out. 

Leaving you alone, you pull out your phone, also thankful to have a little moment to yourself as you quickly try to catch up on the notifications you had gotten in the past couple of hours, as the noise around you mixes, adding a comforting ambience as you lean against the old walls, your head leaning against your fist. 

You were so engrossed in your own little bubble that you didn’t notice the figure hovering near the other end of the table, only noticing the man when you looked to the side, thinking that either Suguru or Gojo was back, only for your eyes to widen in shock and surprise to be greeted with an unfamiliar face. 

Letting out a small noise, adjacent to an audible gulp, you sit up straighter, looking bashfully at him as you turn your phone off, taking in his slender frame and the rectangular-framed glasses that sit wonkily on his nose as he fidgets nervously with the hem of his lumpy sweater. Ironically, having everything that Gojo has but wearing it so drastically differently that you have to snap yourself out of the comparison. 

The boy's hair is slightly parted, light blonde, and his eyes framed with what seemed like brown lashes. His cheeks are dusted with light freckles, and his smile is lopsided as he scratches the back of his neck. 

Cute in a schoolish way, you think.

“H-hi,” his voice is high, squeaking and wobbly as he leans on the booth, not knowing what to do with his arms as he uses the back of his hand to push his glasses upwards, “Hi, I just…” 

Your head tilts slightly, curiosity filling your eyes as you give him a gentle smile, waiting patiently for him to find his words. 

“I’m Kento,” he stammers after a second, scratching behind his ears as a red flush settles over his high cheeks, “I’m sitting over there,” he points to a table behind him, and your neck cranes to see a group of boys his age all staring at his back, “And I just thought-” 

He opens his mouth to say something else, but pauses, his gaze drifting to something, or rather someone, coming his way, and you’re too focused on the way sweat dots at his hairline or the way he fidgets with the hem of his sweater to even notice the full glass of water sliding in front of you from the other side of the booth. 

Your back straightens as your head whips to the side, eyes widening when you realize that Satoru had returned, his one drink nestled in his hand as his stare bounces between you and, who you evidently had just discovered, Kento. 

Blue eyes flicker over your face, a moment's decision faltering in his mind as he slithers into not his original seat in front of you, but next to you, his large frame taking up half of your side of the both as your brows furrow in confusion, lips pulling into a tote as your eyes squint at the way he hunkers in like it was normal. 

Is he okay? You try not to have your heart burst out of your chest and flip flop around on the table like a fish out of water at being in such proximity to Satoru, but you don’t even have time to think about that as the rest of your mind falters, trying to make sense of this behavior. 

One of his beefy arms unravels from his side as it stretches above your head, resting atop the cushioned seats as he sighs deeply through his nose, taking a sip of his drink as if he hadn’t interrupted anything, and his chin turns over to the boy, waiting. 

Kento stammers, even worse than before, as he pushes back his spiky hair with a hand, looking between you and Satoru as you blink slowly, not really knowing what to do, awkwardly lingering in your seat as you wonder if anybody’s going to talk.

“Everything alright?” Satoru asks finally, his voice slightly lower than usual, somewhat taunting but hard to tell, seeing that his face was blank, thick as it almost bounces off Kento’s skull, his cheeks turning into a bright pink as you lets out a small exhale of air, something resembling a shocked laugh at the strange and sudden shift in his behavior. 

“I, uh, I,” Kento’s voice wobbles as he seizes up Satoru’s size and his overall presence, a strange look of shock and even awe as you gnaw on the inside of your cheek, not fully knowing what was going on as Kento’s head dips in embarrassment, “I’m sorry…I didn’t know, uh, that you, you were…yeah…sorry…”

His arm raises in a small wave, quickly turning on his heels, the back of his neck almost red as you blink rapidly, letting out a small huff of air as your neck almost snaps towards the man next to you, stammering as you try to find your words. 

Satoru looks at you, taking another sip. 

“What?” 

You scoff, eyes nearly bulging out of your head as you stumble over a slew of words. 

“What? W-what do you mean what?” You let out a bewildered laugh, looking across the pub at the boy and his group of friends that almost seem to be comforting him, their hands on his shoulders as he profusely shakes his head, “What the hell was that for?”

His white brows pinch in the middle, as if he doesn't understand your startlement, as if you were the one being crazy.

But you weren’t being crazy. Not in the slightest. 

You brushed it off the first time Satoru scared off a guy who was talking to you. You thought it was strange, sure, how in the middle of your lively conversation of John Milton and Paradise Lost that he wandered from the other side of the room, suddenly attached to your side, his height towering over the other guy as he quieted down and scurried away. You just chalked it up to him being bored, despite how annoyed you were. 

The second time, a guy was seconds away from putting his phone in your number when Satoru’s voice rang in your ears, and you watched, horrified, as he peered down at the guy's cracked phone screen, scoffing at the fact that he was listening to some stupid band he disapproved of. 

Then there was the time when you were at this same pub, getting some drinks for Shoko, waiting at the counter, flirting with the guy next to you when Satoru found his way back to you, as if pulled by a magnet, and asked the guy if he always chose to talk to girls he didn’t know with a fresh hickey on his neck. (That one you weren’t mad at, more so embarrassed).

But it’s happened countless times. At the pub, at gatherings, at galas he’s invited you to as his plus one because he said nobody else could make it, at the library when he came a little too early and a guy from your class was sitting next to you, at the cafe, and at the small party he threw last year.

And if you weren’t so in love with him, you’d be madder than you were. You knew he was just being a protective and caring friend, not wanting you to get hurt, but you knew you’d have to start moving on from this debilitating crush, and he wasn’t making it any easier.

“I just asked him if everything was alright,” he explained, his tone bordering on bored as he pulls out his phone, checking the time as he angles his body slightly to look at you better, and you're somewhat aware of the fact that his arm is still somewhere above your head, “He’s the one that scurried away.” 

Your mouth drops open, your palms jamming into your eye sockets as your head hits the table, banging it a couple times as you try to pull away from him, slightly angered, slightly, and very, ever so slightly, internally flustered at something you definitely should be flustered over.

“You…you scared him away!” Your voice is muffled as you groan, not caring much as you shoot him an angry and bitter look.

Satoru’s lashes flutter slightly, his pink lips pulling into a confused line as you shove his knee with your own, realizing that you were, in fact, not joking and were seriously considering the idea of giving that blubbering mess a chance.

“Are you - are you serious?” His thumb jabs in the general direction of where he had gone, “Him?”

You roll your eyes, chest heaving with a sigh as your forehead continues to rest on the cool tabletop, the tip of your nose rubbing against the varnish as you groan.

Deep down, you know that this crush of yours is fruitless and useless. It’s never going to get anywhere, and the only thing it can offer you is more hurt and rejection. You know that you are so far from his type and out of your league that he’d never see you as more than a friend, if that, but you continued to have it because it lit a fire inside of you that you sadistically enjoyed. 

That being said, you would prefer, at some point, to have a romantic moment, even if fleeting, and having the man you’ve been in love with for two years chase away the only guy who’s had the balls to come up to you made you irrationally annoyed for some reason that you didn’t fully understand. 

“He…he seemed nice,” you argue, your eyes closing shut as your hand shifts, and you rest your cheek on the back of it, your back bent at an angle as you look up at him from your position on the table, “And he was cute-” 

Gojo cuts you off with a startled laugh, a disbelieving one as his eyebrows shoot upwards, showing more than the five emotions you usually see him with as genuine shock laces his features, and it only spurs on that angry fire inside of you as you press. 

“What? What? He was cute!” Your head lifts quickly from its spot on the table as your body shifts to look at him even better than before, trying not to notice the cute wrinkle of his nose or the frosty irises of his eyes that are looking so intently at you that it could knock the air out of your lungs if you stare long enough, “And I…I don’t know, I think he wanted to talk to me!” 

Gojo snorts, his arm tightening around the cushion behind you, his hand dangling off the end, his fingers dangerously close to the side of your ear as you swallow thickly. 

“Well, of course, he wanted to talk to you,” his other hand pushes his glasses upwards, the veins on the back of his hand evident, “ I just can’t believe that he’s someone you’d want to entertain.”

You stutter, hurt flashing across your face as it pulls into sour bewilderment.

You’ve barely talked to Satoru for more than a couple of minutes at a time about classes or projects or annoying classmates, and you can’t believe your luck that the first conversation between the two of you that stemmed outside of those points is about this.

“What, what’s that supposed to mean?” Your voice dips slightly, embarrassed, as his own expression slightly shifts at your tone.

He pinches the bridge of his nose, clearly not expecting this to blow up in his face as it did, and he sighs, retreating to his old, composed self as he explains himself. 

“Look, I have him in a couple of my classes,” he starts again, lips pulling into a thin line as he looks over his shoulder to Kento and then glances back to you, “He shows up late and never does his work and always asks to most ridiculous questions,” Satoru adds and you try not to have your lips quirk at the sudden revelation, not wanting to give in and let your foolish feeling stake the wheel and guide you to forgiving him, but it’s not use as he continues, “I just figured that…someone like that isn’t someone good for you. Even if he did just want to talk.” 

Your mouth dries up, and you try not to let your head burst and remind yourself that he’s thinking about this from a friend's perspective, something kind and caring and companionly, but not in the way you would want from your crush, but Satoru is still waiting on your response so instead you swallow everything down and your lips tote, avoiding eye contact as you attempt to seem indifferent despite your outburst. 

“How ridiculous are his questions?” You finally ask, peeking over at him from where your gaze had been training on the ice in your water, and you swear you see a flicker of surprise take over his gorgeous features, as though you were going crazy with the way his blankness faded momentarily and gave way to a little smile. 

He sighs, this time lighter, his hand behind you shifting ever so slightly to push at the back of your head, gingerly but in a teasing way as you try not to smile a giddy smile, one that doesn’t reflect the fact that you couldn’t really care about the guy who had come up to talk to you when Satoru cared enough because he didn’t think he was good enough for you to talk to. 

“Even more ridiculous than asking if adding ice to rice would help it steam up more than if you used water,” he says, picking up his drink as he nurses it over his mouth, fighting back a smug grin at the way you sputter, pushing him roughly as your cheeks heat up again for bringing up one of your late-night queries. 

“Fine, fine, fine, I’ll give you this one!” You rub at your eyes, shoulders hunched, “But you have to stop scaring off every single guy that tries to talk to me! He could be a normal guy who’s going to come up, and you’re going to disapprove of him just because he wears mismatched socks or only writes in pen!” 

Satoru snorted indifferently, proving your point that he didn’t seem to care. 

“Writing solely in pen is psychotic behavior,” he grumbled to himself, recalling the time one of his classmates had the gall to ask you for your number before he quickly shut it down, inserting himself in the middle of the conversation until the guy gave up and left. 

You groan, head dropping back onto the table as you tap it lightly, a quiet thud reverberating in your tiny corner of the room. 

“One of these days you’re going to have to come to terms with the fact that the reason you shut people down is different from the reasons I shut people down.” You say, moving your arms upward so that you could set your cheek on it, looking at the empty seats in front of you instead of the man you’ve had a crush on, sputters. 

“What do you mean?” His voice drops a little bit, and you angle your head to look up at him, brows pinching in the middle as you let out a little laugh, something sardonic as you shake your head to yourself. 

“You…” you pause, stopping, sighing to yourself as you try to control your words before you say something you’ll regret, “You have like…perfect people coming up to you. And if you choose to reject them, that’s up to you, I get it. But last week you turned a girl down because she said that Star Wars was a waste of money,” the two of you share small laugh because you can recall just how red he got, embarrassed but peeved when somebody just offended his entire lifeline, but you continue, “It…it’s just,” you press your lips together as something in your chest clenched, “I don’t really have that luxury. I don’t have perfect guys coming up to me with little quirks, you know? There’s always something wrong with them, even if I don’t see it then. Like they don’t show up to dates or they make fun of my major, or just…only want to sleep with me, and then when they find out I don’t want that, they leave. And any of the sane ones that have small issues, you’re always there to shoot them down!” 

You stop, taking in a deep breath as you try to regulate your emotions, refusing to look at him right now as you let some pent-up feelings loose, just grateful that he hasn’t left and decided to let you figure this out on your own. 

“Look,” you glance at him, giving him a small smile, “I’m thankful that you care. Really, I am. But…but I just want to experience something…with someone, y’know? At least once when I’m still in university. I’m almost twenty-one, and I haven’t even had my first kiss!” Despite how embarrassing it is, it slips out, and your chees heat up as you hurry on with your ramble, “And if it has to be with something who asks stupid questions or says my name wrong on the first attempt or doesn’t know what my favorite color is, I guess I’m just gonna have to bite the bullet and take that risk. I,” you look away, back to focusing on the leather cushions in front of you as you gnaw on your lip, “I don’t really have any other option.”

Giving it a moment, you let your shoulders sink, going back to playing with the straw wrapper in front of you as you debate whether it would be better to just throw yourself out the window or risk saying something else that you’d stay awake the next couple of nights pinching yourself over.

You heard him inhale exaggeratingly, the arm behind you moving a little downwards in order to hook one of his fingers around the collar of your sweater, trying to grab your attention. You tilt your chin sideways, lips pursed, and attempt not to let his overwhelming presences budge how bitter you were feeling for some reason. 

“I think,” he sighed again, gnawing on his bottom lip as he tried to formulate his thoughts, the overhead lamp casting a soft orange light over his face and it made your pitiful stomach churn with desperate want, “I think that if you’re too pessimistic.” 

That get’s a dry laugh from you, and you roll your eyes at his statement. Before he’s able to say anything, he gets interrupted by Suguru rounding the corner, sliding into his seat with a wide grin, one that falls when he sees his friend has changed the seating arrangement. 

“Why’d you move?” 

Satoru paused, tearing his eyes away from the side of your face as he glanced at his friend, his fingers moving upwards as you tried not to look at him and make anything obvious. You hope he doesn’t bring up Kento and your little meltdown, but he seems to read your mind. 

“You were bothering me too much,” he mutters, and Suguru lets out a startled scoff, throwing the hair tie around his wrist at him as Sator just flings it to the side. Suguru doesn’t push, though, and starts telling the two of you that he was held up at the bathroom entrances because a couple was having a ‘lover's spat’, his words not yours, and he just had to hear it before he left.

The rest of the night continued as it usually does. 

If you could consider the uneven rhythm of your heart as normal. 

—

Another week had passed, another seven days of agonizingly slow school work and duties. 

It seemed like the days would flicker away at a snail-like pace until it got you to the one day of the week that you actually wished wouldn’t arrive, and would force you to stalk around the limited space of your dorm room as you think about what to wear to the theatre production that’s taking place in thirty minutes. 

Your hand was on your hip, feet tapping against the floor as you looked at the two outfits you had hung on your dresser, lips pursed as your eyes moved back and forth between the one that would go better with those pair of kitten heels you thrifted with Shoko, or the dres that you rarely get to wear. 

It took a couple more seconds of deciding, but you ultimately picked the more comfortable option, knowing that the university theater was always freezing, especially in October, and that a cute sweater was probably the better choice.

Thankfully, this gave you some more time to fix your hair and touch up your makeup, humming along to the music as your eye kept wandering down to your phone and then to your door, squinting as you turned it over, confused as to what was taking Shoko so long. 

Instantly, your eyes widen at the plethora of messages you have from Shoko, a telltale sign that something was seriously wrong, given the fact that she never sent more than two messages at once. 

shoko: pick up

shoko: girl ur literally always on ur phone wya

shoko: pls pls pls pick up 

shoko: ur making me beg rn pls can u call me back 

shoko: pls 

You don’t have time to send her one of your stupid stickers, your fingers fumbling around as you look at the five missed calls you have from her, shaking your head in dismay at how it was possible to leave your phone alone for twenty minutes and come back to this. 

It doesn’t take more than a ring before she answers on the other line. 

“Are you okay?” Your voice cuts through immediately, rushed and worried, your legs bouncing as you hear some people talking in the background, and you can hear the way Shoko snaps at them to hush so that she can hear you better. 

“Hi, yeah, no, no I’m fine - hey can you guys just,” she calls out again, hey annoyance dripping form her tone, some shuffling happening over the line as she moves somewhere where the noise is less, “Hey, hi, sorry for the noise,” she starts again and you just hum, eyebrows still pinches together in worry as you wait for her to continue, “I’m really sorry for spamming you, but I have some news.” 

The worry on your face melts as you lean back in your seat. 

“Yeah…?” you ask, but already predicting what it was that she was stressing out over telling you, but she lets out another exhale, and you could imagine her nodding wherever it was that she was at. 

“I’m so sorry but I’m at work right now and,” some clattering happens in the background, the kitchen in great hustle for the Saturday evening rush it usually has at the restaurant she waitresses for, “God, Tommy just screwed everything up with our shifts and I thought he had written me as off for tonight but he wrote me as off for next Saturday and I wasn’t able to fine somebody to-” 

You laugh softly, cutting off her rambling. 

“‘Ko, babe, it’s fine, don’t worry about it,” you stress, leaning in slightly as you hear some silverware being unloaded, “It’s so okay, your job is so much more important than-” 

“No, you’re more important than this - believe me,” she cuts you off this time, and you can see her standing hunched in the corner, gnawing on her fingernails in stress, “And I promised you I’d come with you and I can’t, and now I…I feel horrible.” 

A smile creeps onto your lips, and you shake your head. 

“It’s fine,” you stress, chuckling at her incoherent rambles, “I promise. The play’s going to be lengthy anyway, might as well take the time to make some money while you’re at it.” 

You hear nothing except the kitchen roaring in the background for a few seconds before she sighs, clicking her tongue as she hums softly. 

“You sure?” 

“I’m sure,” you tell her, hearing her chuckle softly over the phone, the disappointment evident in her voice, and you didn’t want to push her over the edge despite the small flicker of disappointment of having to go alone, “I promise you’re not gonna be missing anything.” 

“Look, I know it’s not the same, but I was with Suguru when I found out, and he’s said that he could-” 

This time, she’s cut off, but not by you. 

A knock sounds over your door. 

You sigh, smiling at your friend as you slowly rise, “You guys are so sweet, but you should’ve told him I’d be fine. Really, I usually do these things by myself anyway.” 

She groans at your antics, somebody calling her name from the back as she tells them that she’s almost done. 

“Shit, I have to go, but promise me you’ll tell me about how tonight goes, yeah?” She sounds hurried, and you make a few steps towards your door as you snort, rolling your eyes as you unlock the brass knob, shaking your head at the thought. 

“Tell you about what? Oh, like how Suguru has a horrific attention span and can’t…” You swing the door wide open, but you trail off as your mouth hangs slightly, not greeted by your black-haired and eyebrow-pierced friend, 

But Satoru. 

Shoko seems to have picked up on your silence as meaning that you finally understood what she was talking about, and you can barely register her sing-songy bye as she leaves, the phone in your hand lying limp as Satoru’s brow raises skeptically at your dumbfounded expression.

Damn you, Shoko Ieiri. 

“Hi,” you say breathlessly, almost stupidly, as your hand falls from behind the door to your side, tilting your head a bit as Satoru just stares, hands in his pockets, and you shake back to reality, laughing apologetically as your neck prickles, “Sorry, I…I was just expecting someone else.”

His brow arches even more, and you huff out a laugh. 

“Shoko just said that Suguru was coming,” you explain, stepping back from the entranceway as his mouth parts slightly. 

“Right,” he nods, his hair falling gracefully in his face as you churn in your spit at the magnificent sight of him in his denim jeans and the navy sweater he was in, “I hope it’s okay that I came. Suguru couldn’t make it.”

You blink, wanting to say that you were so okay with him, but you swallow that done as you shake your head, waving his statement away. 

“This is…this is fine,” You stammer to say, your smile wobbly. You hope that he can’t pick up on the way that your eyes are roaming over the way his button-up sits comfortably on his broad chest, or the way his glasses look on the bridge of his nose, “I, uh, I just have to do my mascara, so give me like,” you look at the clock behind you. Your eyes bulge at the fact that you have only five minutes left, “Two seconds and I’ll be done.”

He nods, his head tilting slightly to the side as he looks at your face and his eyes travel down your outfit. His hand raises, a finger pointed at your sweater. 

“Nice sweater,” he says, something teetering on teasing, and you look down, suddenly realizing that it’s the sweater he had given you last year for your birthday, the one that you had seen months prior after walking past a vintage store and exclaimed how much you liked it, only to be stumped by the price. 

Your confusion melts into a wide smile, your head still poking out from outside your door as you survey the material, not noticing the way his eyes soften just a smidge at your flighty reaction. 

“Oh - right, thank you again for getting it!” You say cheerfully, an entire evening or perfection and romance already forming in your head as you try not to appear too excited, pointing back to your room as you duck away, “I’ll, uh, I’ll be back, then!”

Satoru nods, giving you a small smile as you shut the door behind you, your back hitting it as you give yourself a moment to reciprocate, curse Shoko and her blasted antics, and calm your heartbeat down long enough. 

This was so fine, you tried to tell yourself, 

Everything was going to be fine. 

—-

The lobby of the Oxford theater was unusually packed, and you even voiced your surprise when Satoru led you in, your eyes wide as you took in all the students, some looking at the programs, others waiting in line for the bathroom. 

“Damn,” you mutter, squeezing past someone as Satoru follows behind you, “I didn’t think it was going to be this busy.” 

The walk here had been…fine. You had talked for most of it, which you had predicted, and with the few times Satoru would interject and give some comments on the stories you told him about your week, you feel like you told five times that amount of embarrassing and lame jokes, shutting yourself up once after wincing at how terrible it was. Satoru cracked a small smile, though, a pitiful one, most likely to keep you from shutting up the entire night. 

It’s strange, just how different you act around him. In attempts to make yourself seem cooler and interesting, you wind up embarrassing yourself even more. You could have sworn that you never acted like this with Shoko or Suguru, or literally anybody else, even your old crushes, but when it came to Satoru, you seemed to lose the sense of normalcy you had come to know. 

But you don’t have time to worry about that, now trying to put your attention on wondering how many of the students here are from that stupid class you’re taking right now, and even looking in the sea of bodies confirms that answer when you see some familiar faces. The concession stand in the corner, the one run by the theater department to raise some extra funds, seems to be swarmed, and your stomach grumbles instantly at the smell of buttered popcorn that wafts through the air. 

“Where’re our seats?” He’s standing by you now, and you have to crane your neck slightly to look at him. You sift through your tote, pulling out your wallet and opening it to reveal the tickets tucked inside, and hand one to him while keeping the other for yourself. 

“Row H,” you read out loud, “You’re seat 18, and I’m 19.” 

He nods, pocketing it before he looks back out into the lobby, his eyes focusing on the wide double doors that led you into the theater, watching the ticket taker check the people’s tickets before looking back at the concessions, remembering how much you were raving on your walk here about how good the snacks were. 

“Do you still want some…?” He juts his chin towards the hand-made sign that reads Beggars Snacks! 

“Hm?” You look back at the table, and you let out a small laugh, “Oh, yeah, right,” you look through your wallet again, putting your ticket there for safekeeping as you glance back up at his gorgeous face, “Yeah, I’ll be back. You can go find your seat, if you want.” 

Satoru opens his mouth and then shuts it, glancing at you and then the doors, and his shoulder straightens slightly. 

“Right, well….right,” he murmurs, looking a little torn, his voice drowning out by the roar of sound around you two, but you’re able to make out the low grumble of his after being near him for so long, “I’ll…I’ll see you in a few.” 

You smile again, giving him two thumbs up as you turn on your heel, your hands clenching in frustration at how utterly inhuman you seem to act around him, somehow making it seem like it was your first day on this planet. 

Peeking over your shoulder, you watch as he leaves towards the entrance of the theater, and you duck your head down as you find your way to the large line leading up to the snacks. Coming here for the past four years has taught you to go for the popcorn, pass on the homemade cookies, and snatch up the little boxes of candy if they have them. 

Checking your phone as you wait idly, you text Shoko a slew of messages cursing her and her entire bloodline for blindsiding you like this, hoping she sees them after her grueling shift and only feels worse about leaving you like this. 

Keep a tab of the line as it slowly moves, you eye the clock, knowing that the show was going to start soon. It seems to dwindle a bit, as some people in front of you and behind you give and leave, deciding it wasn’t worth it, and after scrolling through your feed a little bit more, you find yourself next in line. 

Glancing through the snacks, your stomach protests louder, ravenous after a day fueled on granola bars, a pathetic excuse of a yogurt bowl, and some crisps you had lying around, until you feel your hopes and dreams plummet when you see a small sign at the edge of the table that says only cash. 

Fucking bullshit, you think angrily, whipping your wallet out again as you rifle through the confines, who still uses only cash? What medieval system was this? They accepted cards last time, this is entirely-

And you could complain petulantly in your head as much as you want, but your face falls as you search through for the third time, coming to the consensus that you didn’t have a lick of cash on you. The person in front of you is almost done, but your shoulders sag as you begrudgingly step away, shaking your head in dismay as you make your way to the theater entrance, flashing your ticket to the ticket taker as he lets you in with a wide smile. 

The ushers point you towards aisle H, and you patiently dispute the hate still inside of you, burning. Waiting as those in front of you find their seats, and it doesn’t take long before you’re able to see a pop of hair standing high amongst the rest of the people in the audience. 

You move past a couple of people talking as you move closer, almost skidding when you stop instantly, realizing that Satoru was, in fact, not alone. 

From this angle, you could see the girl standing in front of him, a wide grin on her face as she laughs at something he says. Your eyes go to his face, your posture falling even more when you see the little quirk of his lips, a sign that he wasn’t necessarily hating the conversation, and the loss of the popcorn feels pointless now as your stomach churns for another reason. 

It was selfish to think that you were the only person who liked Satoru, but it didn’t hurt any less when you were confronted with this fact at least once a week. You knew you couldn’t expect anything from this stupid crush, a theorem forming inside your head that you continued to fall for Gojo Satoru just because you liked the sting of knowing you had no shot with him, and seeing other girls and their gleeful smiles at the fact that you probably had a chance is what maybe hurt the most. 

You weren’t ever angry at these girls, understanding them completely, even admiring the way they could flirt so effortlessly, and treated you kindly whenever you were near, but it singed a part inside of you that liked to act that you were in this small fictional bubble that you dreamt of whenever he looked your way. 

Like he was right now. 

Standing awkwardly to the side, at the end of the row, you sway idly in your spot, looking at the two of them and then around, wondering when the lights were going to start dimming and notify you of when the show was about to start. 

You hear your name being called, a familiar cluster of syllables from his throat, and you look away from the painting on the wall to the side as you see Satoru throwing up a hand, trying to grab your attention. 

When he sees you finally looking his way, he turns back to the girl, saying a few more words as she nods, her smile still soft as she glances at you, a strange look on her face as she sends you another smile, and you can’t help but return it despite the sinking feeling in your gut. 

She leaves through the other end, and you mutter a few apologies as you finally make your way down to where he was standing, ducking your head down sheepishly as you fidget with the strap of your tote. 

“Hey,” you say meekly, your cheeks heating as you finally get to him, “I didn’t mean to interrupt anything.” 

One of his hands waved, shaking his head as he looked back to where the girl had retreated with her friends. 

“You weren’t interrupting,” he tells you, and your brows furrow slightly because that was a white lie if you’ve ver heard one, “I knew her from my lab,” he he says, scratching the back of his neck as his eyes trace of your face, falling to your empty arms as they squint, the conversation with the girl suddenly feeling his head as he points, “Where’s your popcorn?”

The past couple of moments seem to flee too as you wring your hands awkwardly together, shooting him a tight smile as you try to appear indifferent. 

“Oh, they didn’t take card,” you mumble bitterly, “And I forgot my wads of cash back in my dorm, so,” you shrug, laughing it off as you point to the seats, “But it’s fine, I…erm, wasn’t really feeling it anyway,” a lie, since that was all you could talk about, but you push past him as you sit down, setting your tote on your lap as you look at him, waiting for him to do the same.

Satoru peeks at you, his lips pressed into a thin line as he swallows, not doing anything to sit down as one of your brows moves upwards, confused about the mental turmoil that he was going through, which made him reluctant to sit. 

“Everything okay?” You ask slowly, shifting your legs, wondering if he was tight for room, but he just nods, tongue poking through his rosy lips as he glances back towards the double doors as he briefly nods. 

“I need to use the bathroom,” he mutters, and you nod, lips pursing in understanding as you look over your shoulders, watching as more people start taking their seats.

“Okay,” you sit back a little bit, your finger pointing behind you to where the bathrooms were, “Well, you, you should probably go, like, now. I think the shows going to start,” you say with a light chuckle and check your phone, realizing that there were only five minutes left till the lights turned off, “In a little bit.”

Satoru just nods again, saying spoke few words before he turns to leave, murmuring apologies to the people sitting down as his long legs knock their knees, and you watch him leave the aisle and go before you turn your attention back to the stage, taking the time to admire the props and the set design, trying to think back to the original story and see if it lines up with how you remembering it starting. 

When the overhead lights start flickering, and Satoru isn’t back yet, you churn in your seat, looking over your shoulder every couple of seconds, hoping that he doesn’t have to navigate back in the dark. 

You send him a small text saying that it was almost going to be lights out when you see his figure in the corner of your eye, watch as he nears your row with his arms full, and you squint, trying to see through the dimness to see what it was that he was holding. 

The closer he gets, the more you’re able to see, and it’s only until he’s lowering himself to sit down that you make out the popcorn bag in one hand, and some boxes of sweets in the other. 

He says nothing as he shoves the popcorn into your hand, settling in as he looks around the seat, trying to move the armrests up only to see that they’re stuck in place, completely oblivious to your wide-eyed stare as he lets out a big sigh, resting back as his legs spread out a little bit. He opens a box of Maltesers, adjusting his glasses as he looks at the stage. 

“Want some?” He finally says, his voice low as he pushes the red box towards you, and your cheeks are almost on fire as you glance at the paper bag of popcorn in his outstretched hand. 

“I…” you blink, holding onto the popcorn so that it doesn’t spill, “Here.” You dumbly give him the bag back, assuming that he had only given it to you so that he could sit down more comfortably. 

Only now does he tear his eyes away from the stage, tuning out the voice over the announcements, the regular message of turning off your phones and staying quiet, as his elbow pushes your arm back to your seat. 

“Can’t have corn,” he says bluntly, looking over at your startled expression, “It’s yours.” 

It’s yours.

Here’s another moment you're going to mull over before another minuscule thing he does happens again, and you spend the next months thinking about that.  

“Are you sure?” You whisper, already pulling your phone out to Venmo him for it, but Satoru can already tell what you're about to do as he flicks it away, as if it was repulsive to him, and you don’t have any time to argue because the curtains pull outwards and reveal the actors.

You drag a hand over your face, trying not to look over at him anymore as you begrudgingly accept the kind token, trying to relax in your seat as the show begins, a tentative finger plucking out a popcorn as you bring it to your mouth, hoping that the only person who can what the blood roaring in your ears is you. 

—

Nearly a quarter in, and you start to realize just how bad an idea this was. 

The play itself was great. The actors were delivering their performance in a manner that felt reminiscent ot the campy nature of the original text, and some people in the audience were keeling over with laughter in certain parts. 

You found yourself with a wide smile throughout most of it, recalling some of the bits and others jogging your memory, but you were thoroughly enjoying it nonetheless. The issue was, the person next to you seemed to be despising it. 

The rare couple of times you peeked over to see his reaction to a couple of things, you noticed his jaw clenched, sitting straight and uptight as his eyes never left the stage. He barely mustered up a smile during the funny portions, looking utterly depleted during the serious bits, and his hands were clasped together, fingers interwoven as he sighed, unamused. 

Every time somebody would do something weird, you’d glance his way and would still see the same stone-cold expression on his face. You were aware that the play itself was over exaggerated and strange at times, but that was the whole appeal of it in the first place. But at times, you tried to view it through the lens of someone who didn’t go in-depth into literature and read the nuances of somebody like Satoru, who would rather spend their free time studying and working on their mountain of assignments, not something like this, and you felt your chest getting heavier and heavier with each second. 

When it neared intermission, you could’ve sworn you had nearly melted in your seat, your popcorn done as you glanced over at Satoru when the lights finally turned back on, people around you standing up to leave or stretch. 

A beat of silence passes before you clear your throat, mustering up a wobbly grin as you jab a thumb to the curtains. 

“Funny, huh?” 

Satoru blinks, as if coming back to, and you debate if he had been half asleep. The thought makes you sink even deeper in embarrassment. 

“It’s, uh,” he ran a hand through his hair, pushing it back as he swallowed thickly, “It’s…interesting. I haven’t really seen anything like it before.” 

You pause, chew on the side of your lip, rubbing at your eyes as you try to think of anything else to say. You’ve spent time with him alone, sure, but never in a situation where it felt like you had to defend yourself, your background, the whole reason why you were here in the first place, like you are now. 

People bustle around the two of you, and he sits up a little straighter, pushing his shoulders back as his neck cracks a bit. 

“It’s raunchy and… theatrical,” you try to explain, attempting to seem unconcerned as you fold the paper bag up and set it neatly on the ground, making a mental note to pick it up before you leave. “But I think it’s really interesting given the period it was written and how vulgar, everything is, and the characters are all super unlikable, which you don’t really see in these kinds of productions, and, well, it’s supposed to be funny and…fun, I guess,” your voice dies down, your lips almost chewed raw as you wait for a reaction, a facade of interest, a pitiful acknowledgement to what felt like your livelihood, but he just nods. 

You suck in a deep breath, gaze darting around the theater as you try to look at anything else.

Noticing your sudden silence, his eyes leave the stage for a moment as they rake over your expression, see the way your lips pull into a small, worried line, the crease between your brows, something that appeared whenever you were stressed or confused. His face seemed to melt to mirror yours. 

“Is there a reason why they keep calling the daughter a slut?” He finally asks, and your eyes dart back to him, and your cheeks puff, blinking slowly as you nod, embarrassed for some reason as you stammer to find words. 

“It’s, erm, well, it’s in the original material, but,” your words mesh together as you try to call back on the research paper you did for this piece, your mind blanking as your cheeks heat, “But I think they keep it in because it’s supposed to be a demonstration of the degradation of women and the differentiation between men who also exhibit premarital interest in the sex…and it’s not supposed to be funny but they repeat it a lot, so you kind of become numb to the meaning of the word...” Your rambling quiets near the end as you shoot him another tense smile, wringing your hands together as your lips tremble, looking away as a last resort to save your dignity. 

After spending two years with him, you’ve become familiar with his routine and what he expects from his day-to-day life. What some describe as the prodigal son, Gojo Satoru, if not with friends, is usually found in the back of the library, in his dorm, or somewhere quiet with papers strewn in front of him, with his laptop out, typing away. He sometimes goes to benefits and galas, some to attend because of his parents, others because of his biochemistry path, but his time isn’t usually spent at the theater watching vulgar plays. 

That’s what you did.

And of course, you didn’t come here weekly. You had to be here for that godforsaken Literature in English class. But this was a part of you, this play, this environment, these exaggerated dialogues are what you spent your time obsessing over. The history and the meaning, and the importance of English literature and writings are your life, and having someone next to you, watching a personification of it live, felt like inviting them into a piece of your mind, even if they wouldn’t view it as such. 

But to you, you who liked to overcomplicate and read into things, saw it as such, and your heart was thumping erratically when you realized that Satoru probably saw this, you, as equally insane for enjoying something like this. 

And you hated how much the thought made you spiral, made you think of yourself less than when there was a possibility that this wasn’t what Satoru was thinking at all, but the slight chance, the small probability, is what stirred the trepidation in you. 

“Are you enjoying it?” 

His question brings you out of your mental fever, and you bite your cheek, wondering what the right answer would be. He’s watching you, waiting, and you exhale shakily, smiling poorly as you swallow back some bile.

“I, I am,” you say finally, “It’s just…I did this huge essay on this last year, and I’ve been looking for a rendition of it, but there’s only this old movie that’s so far been made, so…seeing this live is pretty cool.” 

He nods, looking at your stalled expression as you keep your eyes trained on the curtains, not wanting to show your internal thoughts on your ever-so expressive face, and he tries to keep his slight confusion at bay for your suddenly reserved self. 

As you try to feign indifference by going on your phone, you can watch him from the corner of your eyes, look around, and uncharacteristically fidget in his seat as he debates doing the same as you or talking some more, which, at the moment, you don’t appear content to do. But the more you try to ignore him, the more it seems like your body has a physical reaction to it, protesting your desire to keep to yourself. 

“Did you do anything fun today?” You ask, putting your phone down as you scratch at the inside of your wrist. He blinks, looking a little quizzically at you before he clears his throat. 

“Well, Suguru had set me up for a double date,” he explains, and you feel your chest tighten a little bit, “But…eh,” he shrugs, “I wasn’t really feeling it,” he drags a hand over his face, “If only he knew where I’d end up instead, huh?” He nudges your elbow with his, a teasing grin on his face, but blood roars in your ears upon hearing his words. 

Gods, the man who despised dates and unaccounted occasions and strange meetings would rather take that over this.

You let out a little puff of air, trying to give him a smile as you feel sweat dot on the back of your neck, your palms clammy as you wring your hands together, looking down at your shoes as you try to bite back the lump in your throat.

He’d rather be anywhere else than here, your mind blares, the unspoken words ringing in the small expanse of your heart.

There’s a strange gurgle in your stomach, one that shifts sharply, and you wince. This is definitely not a part of your internal trade, and you hope that when you shift to place a hand on it to try and calm it down. You turn your phone off, pocketing it in your tote, and the sudden movement makes you jerk in pain. You sit back up, hoping that he won't notice. 

But, of course, he does. 

He angles his body towards you, brows cinched as your eyes twitch barely. 

“Are you okay?” His voice his deep, tinged with worry, his head leaning towards you just a bit so that you can feel his minty breath fan across your warm cheek. 

You wave him off, shooting him a horrifically terrible smile as you shift, your head tilting to the side as your stomach makes another alien noise. 

“Yeah,” you mutter, almost like a question because even you don’t know if you’re alright, “Yeah, I just think it’s the popcorn on an empty stomach.” But even that explanation made no sense. It seems like your stomach is churning even more with each passing second, and you really wish that he couldn’t tell that every moment is a testament to your battle for control of your own body.

“Do you want some water?” He asks, looking over his shoulder to the doors, remembering that the concession stand was also selling bottled drinks, “I’ll get some-” 

But your hand shoots out, gripping the fabric of his sleeve as you tug on it, shaking your head as you attempt to situate yourself back in your seat, your act going well besides the slight crack in your face at a particularly painful jab. 

“No, no, it’s fine, I’m fine,” the lights flicker again above you, and you’re somewhat grateful for them, grateful hat you can’t see the obvious fear on his face at the prospect of you being sick near his very hygienic self, “The shows starting, anyway, so just,” your voice dips a little as you try to contain a groan, “Just stay.” 

He goes to protest, but your hold on him is strangely tight for someone so riddled with pain, and his mouth parts to say something, but the glare you shoot him nearly shuts him up. 

“Please,” you mutter, the embarrassment from several things thick in your voice as you wince, your eyes melting into something pleading as the applause begins, and his face falls for a second, but you look away, weakly clapping along with everybody else. 

You feel tears prickly in your eyes. 

And you hope he can’t see the shining gloss when you try to blink them back. 

—

When the show ends, you’re nearly debilitated with the pain in your abdomen, and the mortification from having watched Macheath’s other wife battle it out with Polly alongside Satoru. They mix into a terrible combination, one that forces you to come back into consciousness in the middle of the theater, the bright overhead lights nearly sending you into a psychosis. 

There must have been something horrifically wrong with either the popcorn or the butter they put on it, because, despite your blurry view, you can see a few people in the audience huddled up in their seats the same way as you, despite the play ending. 

Satoru cleans up next to you, taking his boxes of candy and your strewn popcorn bag, and sits back up to look at you nervously.

“Are…are you sure you’re okay?” His gentle tone is one that you barely register as your hands grip onto the armrest. You can barely even muster up a hum, giving him a shaky thumbs up as your stomach gurgles again, this time, audibly. 

You try to stand, but your knees wobble, and you grip onto the back of the seat as your head sways. You can feel his grip on your elbow, nearly knocking over some people's bottles beside him from how fast he stands up, and your clammy face looks upward at him, swearing that he looks like an angel with the light framing his hair.

“I,” you clamp your mouth shut, swallowing thickly as you wince, taking a few seconds before you start again, “I have to use the loo.” The declaration comes out as a whisper, an ashamed one, and you can’t look him in the face, even if his nods insistently, an arm of his wrapping around the expanse of your back as he tries to steady you

“There’s one near the concessions,” he tells you, his voice strangely considerate and temperate, head leaning down to get closer to your ear so that you could hear him better, “Do you think you can make it?”

You feel like a child, but you only nod, neck and face flaring up in embarrassment as you allow him to guide you through the aisle of people, not looking anybody in the eyes as you make it out, your legs shaking slightly. If it weren’t for him, you’re sure you would’ve toppled down in pain by now.

The walk out of the theater becomes a blur, letting him guide you towards the bathrooms with one of your hands wrapped tightly around your stomach, as if it would ease the pain, and you feel the two of you come to a stop as you stand next to the ladies' door. 

His arm around you falls, and you miss its warmth. He looks crossed with different emotions as you use the wall to hold yourself up, wobbling towards the bathroom as you shoot a look over your shoulder. 

“Thanks,” you whisper, your eyes widening and then shutting instantly at how much it hurts your head, “I’ll…I’ll be back.” The words slur in your mouth, and you don’t give him any time to react before you leave through the wooden door and book it to a stall. 

The moments that follow afterwards are what you’d expect from a case of bad butter. 

You kneel on the floor, heaving everything up, trying to be as quiet as possible so the girls in the stalls around you can’t hear, but it’s not a process that you’re particularly fond of and can feel your will to continue weakening as you leave back on the wall, your head in yours hands as you hear the toilet automatically flush. 

At least getting it out of your system seems to have made the painful throbs dull down to an annoying little jab, but you feel like the bulk of the damage has already been done. Satoru was sweet enough that he’d try to never bring this up again, but you knew you’d have to live with the humiliation of this evening for a couple of months before you did something else that would top it. 

You let your head tilt back and heave a gulp of air, palms jamming into your eyes as you attempt to swallow, your mouth too dry to produce any saliva. If Shoko were here, she’d at least try to make you laugh about the ridiculousness of it all. But it’s just you and Satoru, and you don’t know if you can even look at him for the next week after tonight.

Giving yourself a little more time to calm down, you heave yourself up from your position on the floor, careful not to touch the ground, and pluck your bag off the hook, miraculously throwing it on before you hunched, so as it wouldn’t touch anything too icky. 

You wash and scrub your hands, feeling dirty and still a little sick as you splash some water on your face, hoping the cool water will help snap you back. The girls around you talk, some drying their hands, others touching up their makeup in the mirror. One of the girls next to you watches you through your reflection, her face pale and strands of hair wet as she splashes some water onto her face. 

“Popcorn?” She asks, and your eyes find hers through the mirror, blinking slowly as your hands grip the counter. 

“Yeah,” you take a deep inhale of air, sharing a small smile with her as you turn off the faucet, “Do you want some hand sanitizer?” You offer, going to reach into your tote, but she waves it off, giving you a kind smile as she continues to wash her hands, probably feeling just as bad as you were. 

Giving her a small nod as you go to the paper towel dispenser, you reach around for your phone, opening it up as you quickly send a text to Shoko to update her on where you were, nothing too long, just to be safe, and tap the tip of your shoe on the ground, debating what to do next. 

You could go see Satoru, probably waiting outside, and awkwardly explain that you should probably walk back, seeing how his germaphobic personality might not mesh with the fact that you had basically deposited your entire day in the theater washroom. You could also try to sneak away and hope that he was standing somewhere that granted you the option of stealth, but you quickly shook that off, quickly understanding how pathetic and childish it was.

After another moment of thought, you ball up the towel and throw it away, pushing the door open with your shoulder as you enter back into the lobby, the business having died down just a bit, and look around bravely for the man. 

Spotting the pop of white near the end of the room, you take a few steps forward before you halt, stopping near a wall that offered you a little bit of insight as to what he was doing as you peeked around the corner. 

2 - 0, you think sunkenly, watching the way Satoru talks to another girl, his broad shoulders shielding her from where you originally were, and that familiar ache enters your chest as you play with the hem of your sweater.

You could be sadistic when it came to your unrequited feelings; that much you had made peace with. But the universe was horrifically masochistic for the situations it thrust you into. 

His face is a little more stiff than before, but still polite and kind as he cranes his neck to look at the girl. Her hair is pulled into a sleek bun, one that you always envied with how clean and precise some girls were able to make theirs, and watched how her hand lingered on his arm, something you could never get away with without his face falling into contained disgust. 

It’s unfair to think this way of this stranger, you remind yourself, after all, if you had the guts, you’d try to make a move on him too. 

So, in another moment of decision-making, you get your phone out again, trying to contain the little tremble in your lips as you start drafting a message to him. It’s for the best, you try to reason, telling him that you were too sick and didn’t want to give him what you had. You send another message, saying that you were going to make your way back to your dorm and that you hope he had fun, thanking him as much as you could without sounding pathetic for how much he did this evening and for coming. 

You also sent him the venmo transfer for the popcorn you were going to make earlier for good measure. 

Where you were presented you an easy way to slip out of the building, one of the exits a little bit behind you, as you rubbed at your tired eyes, wrapping your arms around your torso as you prepared for the cold gusts of wind that were going to hit you the moment you stepped out. 

People around you were talking in muted voices, laughter ringing around your ears as you ducked your head down, hoping that this time by yourself could give you some moments of peace, even though you knew that being alone with your onslaught of thoughts was going to do the exact opposite.

This campus was always bustling on a Saturday night, so you never felt too alone as you made your way away from the theater, pulling out your headphones as you geared up your phone to listen to some music before you heard a muffled shout from behind you. 

Brows furrowing and your eyes slightly shifted in confusion, you, along with some other students around you, looked to see what the sound was. 

To your utter horror and stupefaction, you watch as Satoru whips his head around, as if he were looking for something, or rather someone. 

You stand like a deer in headlights, hands raised mid-way to your ears to put your headphones in them as you see him check his phone and then look up again, not caring that other people were looking at him strangely as he runs a worried hand down his face, typing something furiously fast as he looks around again. 

Finally, it seems like he found what he was looking for when your eyes lock, and he sends you an ice-cold, deathly glare, one that made you glance around as if it were someone behind you more deserving of such a look, but before you can do anything, he’s jogging over to where you were frozen in place. 

The closer he gets, the more you can see the agitation and vexation in his microexpressions, things you’ve taken pride in before in reading, now not so much because you were on the receiving end of them. 

When he comes to a halt, phone still in hand, his chest rises and falls a little fast, as if he were out of breath, and he runs another frustrated hand through his white locks as he pushes them back.

Your mouth gapes, and you suddenly remember that you were supposed to be “deathly ill” according to the text you had sent him, and try to make your breathing seem more labored, your posture more haggard, but that doesn't work as he eyes you like he knows.

“Where the hell are you going?” He snaps, and you wince slightly at his tone, and he reels, shooting you an apologetic look despite the fire burning inside of him from the way you’ve been acting this night.

“Back…back to my place,” you whisper, voice hoarse, and he hears it instantly, expression melting as he takes the time to really dissect the way your eyes are slightly bloodshot, your lips chapped, your lashes clumped with tears, and he takes a small step back, taking in a deep breath.

“No, I, shit,” he stammers, restarting, “Are you…” His voice comes out as thick and low, and you almost feel it in your bones as he pinches the bridge of his nose, trying to calm his nerves as he gives you a tilted look, “Are you okay?” 

This time, he’s not asking because you were exhibiting signs of ailment, but because you had been acting like you were strangers since the moment you saw him tonight. Because your behavior was so off and unlike you, he was struggling to understand if there was something beneath the surface, something that had happened that he wasn’t aware of, that was fueling this shift. 

Your eyes seem to waver as you try not to look at him, attempting a nonchalant shrug that is anything but, as you think of how to lower your voice to a deeper register to appear more sick than you really are.

“I feel sick,” you mutter, coughing feigningly as you pull on the straps of your tote upwards, as you clear your throat, trying not to feel the weight of the looks other people were giving the two of you.

A single brow of his raises, one that you know is detecting bullshit as you rub at your nose.

“I’m sure,” he finally murmurs, rolling his eyes at the obvious statement, “I think the entire lobby heard you throwing up your small intestine.” That statement alone almost makes you keel over in shame, humiliation, embarrassment, and disgrace, but he continues, “But…are you…okay? You’ve been…off…the entire night.” 

And you know you can’t sidestep this landmine because you know how weird you’ve been acting this evening, knowing that your attempts to make things better have only backfired, and the past couple of hours come screaming back at you, and for some stupid, depressing reason, cause a sting of tears to prick behind your eyes. 

Your bottom lip catches between your teeth as your head falls slightly, your stomach still aching, your pride and confidence bruised, and you can still smell the lingering perfume of the girl he had been talking to, another reminder that you probably didn’t smell like that perfume you had spritzed on so long ago.

“I’m okay,” you murmur, looking at the cracks on the ground, your voice shaking and wobbling and so clearly not true that you tilt your head back up to see his reaction, your face crumpling into a little wet laugh when he seems completely unmoved. Upon hearing your little giggle, his anger fades a bit, but is quickly replaced with another emotion when he hears you sniffle. 

“Look, you-” he looks down at his phone to reread the text you had sent him, and his confusion seems to grow even more when he reads another notification, “Did you Venmo me?” 

You nod again, weakly, and when you look up at him, you see him fighting back a startled laugh, the quiver on his face making your lips pull up into a wobbly smile, your own emotions turning into something strange as you watch him shake his head in dismay, running a stressed hand through his hair. 

“Did something happen today?” He asks, not taunting, never taunting, but something you can’t place as you weakly not, a sheen over your eyes as you tug at your sleeves. 

“…no,” you whisper, but the two of you know it’s far from the truth because even you can’t hide the way your lips tremble and your hands shake slightly. 

He presses his lips together tightly, his jaw ticking as he takes in your sunken form, something he’s never seen before, and chews on his cheek, thinking. 

Sighing deeply, he pockets his phone, not able to look at your texts anymore because they made him too nauseous, and moves to be closer to you. 

“Come on,” he says after a moment's silence, “Let’s go.”

You peek over at him, your brows furrowing slightly as you huff out a breath of air, trying to contain your tears as you sniffle again. Your bottom lip trembles slightly, and your stomach still has a lingering ache, but there’s something else that’s causing you to be like this, and you don’t like whatever it is. 

He’s waiting, his elbow budging yours, and so you heave a sigh, rubbing at your cheeks as you nudge him back slowly. 

“Thank you, ‘Toru,” you murmur, and he pauses, his tongue caught between his teeth because you rarely call him by that nickname, rarely use it unless you really mean it, “For everything. And I’m sorry,” you peek over at him from above your lashes, looking back at the ground at your shoe so you couldn’t see his reaction, “I didn’t mean to spoil your evening like this-” But before you can say anything more he raises a hurried hand, cutting you off. 

“You didn’t spoil my evening, love,” he says quickly, his tone soft and teetering on worried, the little title slipping out of his mouth like it was natural, and if you weren’t feeling like a pile of shit, you might have fixated on it more, his eyes roaming your anxious face.

But you insistently nod, your lips pressed together as if you were trying your hardest not to let out a pitiful cry in front of him.

“I-I did,” you voice cracks, and you rub at your eyes as some treacherous tears escape, and if only you could truly see the way he looks like he was breaking seeing you like this, “With you getting the popcorn and then me getting sick and then the s-stupid show,” and he winces because he knows you were enjoying the play, could hear your twinkling laugh and he hates it whenever you feel the need to shut down the things you like because you’re worried other people will judge you for doing so, “And…and I wish you had told Shoko o-or me about your date, I would have totally understood,” you try for a smile, your words choked and wobbly and if only you knew what you were doing as you ramble, “I’m just…I’m really sorry for everything." You finish with a quivering chuckle, your heart shaking like a leaf as you finally meet his eyes, hoping he can’t see the little shake in your breathing when you finally do.

He breathes in deeply, and you can hear the gears in his head turning. But you nudge his side again, wanting to leave it at that. You can feel his eyes burning into the side of your face, but you don’t want to look. 

And you’re grateful that to some extent, he understands that, even if not fully. He murmurs a gentle come on, his hand gingerly wrapping around your arm as he tugs to next to him, his warmth enveloping you as he leads the way.

—

As much as you insist, the one thing he doesn’t seem to budge on is taking you back to your dorm. 

You pleaded with him, begged him not to get him sick, but he wouldn’t listen. It’s almost as if he steered you towards his building, a hand hovering over your back as he led you inside and up the elevator and to his room before you could even have the ability to ditch and run away. 

“If you’re going to talk, fine, but don’t think I’m insane enough to leave you alone right now.” 

That alone could have sent you into a psychosis if you weren’t so worried about puking all over his bed. 

With the way his germophobic and clean tendencies forbade him from going to public restrooms, you’re stunned that he’s even standing near you with everything that has happened this night. He even lent you his old band shirt and trousers from when he was going through a phase. 

It was a blur as you spun around his room, rifling through his drawers for towels and soap and things he thought you might want to use in the shower. You stood awkwardly at the foot of his bed, not sitting down on the mattress because you knew how he felt about outside clothes on his sheets, and you said nothing as he handed everything to you, shooting you a shaky smile, one that was tense because you figured he was most likely worried about you staining or ruining one of his clean things. You don’t say anything as he suddenly ducks, his knees hitting the floor as he starts undoing the laces to your shoes, mumbling something about how you bending over might not be the best for your stomach.

He was lucky enough to be in one of the newer buildings, meaning that he had a personal washroom, so he just led you to it and let you know to use the shower and to call out to him if you needed anything. He even had an extra pack of toothbrushes and boxers that he hadn’t touched that he set aside for you. 

You watched as he shut the door, the water roaring behind you as it began to heat up, and you silently stripped, neatly folding your clothes as you set them to the side. You took a tentative step inside his very clean shower, letting the steaming water hit you as you stood there for a couple of minutes, reflecting. 

Washing your face, scrubbing roughly at the makeup and the evening away, you feel some salty tears bite at your cheek, and you don’t even know why you’re crying right now. Well, in all honesty, you do, and that’s probably what hurts the most.

You’ve never cried over Gojo Satoru before. You’ve never felt like it was so depressingly lost where you’d need to use these muscles and these feelings that you reserve for truly important things, but it felt like tonight was a confirmation and closure all in one. It felt like you slowly came to your senses, realized that despite your wishes, it was fruitless. You just weren’t the kind of girl that he could cherish, at least, not in the way you wanted him to, and you knew it would be selfish of you to ruin any chance another girl could have of him being hers. 

It took you a little longer than expected, but you feel like you were slowly gaining consciousness, the reality at hand as you turned the water off, patting yourself dry with the soft towel he had provided you. 

You move carefully, brushing your teeth, pulling on the clothes he left you, as you assess yourself in the fogged-up mirror. Your eyes are a little puffy, but you can just tell him from earlier. Your voice is croaky, but you’ll just bite your words back tonight until you can go back to your place in the morning and start distancing yourself from him until your feelings are choked out. It’s time you began moving on, anyway. 

Braving the other side, you take a deep breath before you carefully open the door, peeking around the corner until you see him sitting on the corner of his bed, furiously typing away until he hears the creak, looking up from across the room as you sheepishly smile. 

He quickly puts his phone away, standing to his feet as he rubs his hands, not knowing what to do as he buffers. 

“Was, erm, was everything good?” He motions to the bathroom, and you quickly nod, walking away as the steam from behind wraps around you, your body adjusting to the shift in temperature as your eyes stray to the couch in the corner, pillows and blankets set up in a makeshift bed. 

“It was great, thank you,” you say gently, “I’m sorry, again-” But he holds a hand up, cutting you off as he insistently shakes his head. 

“Really, it was nothing,” he stresses, his cheeks dusted pink, his glasses discarded on his desk. 

You nod again, embarrassed, and smile stiffly, pointing to the couch as you make your way over. 

“Thanks for this, too,” you say, but he seems to awkwardly shuffle, his hands behind his back, looking like he wants to say something, and your brow slightly quirks at his odd reaction. 

“That’s…that’s for me,” he explains, moving away from his lofted bed as he shows you the changed sheets and the new pillow case covers, what he must have been doing in the time it took for you to shower, “You can sleep here.” He pats the mattress, and you let out a disbelieving chuckle, shaking your head as you move closer to the couch, feeling like the worst person in the world. 

“I couldn’t,” you stress, but he’s already moving closer to you, looking like he wants to move you away from the cushions, “I’ve already imposed enough. I’ll sleep here. It’s fine, really, I like couches.”

He opens his mouth and closes it, lips pressed into a thin line. 

“You haven’t imposed,” he finally says, as if that’s all he took away from your rambles, and you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose as you wave aside his polite nature and hold your hands up. 

“If I sleep on your bed after everything, I’m never going to be able to look you in the eyes again, okay?” You put it bluntly, “So I’ll take the couch, and you’ll take your bed, and it’ll be fine. Okay?” 

His tongue darts out, blinking rapidly as if he’s assessing his different options, and he looks at you, to the couch, and then to the bed. He seems like he’s torn, but he figures that the next best thing is to ignore this completely, shaking his head to himself as he moves around you to the cupboards behind your body, shuffling around until he finds what he needs.

“I’m going to wash up,” he mutters, glancing briefly at you as he pulls in his towel to his chest, his new pair of clothes, and you feel your chest tighten at the sudden dismissiveness in his tone, ad if he’s given up with you, and he makes his way to the separate room, “Make yourself comfortable.” He calls over his shoulder before he shuts the door behind him, and you give it a few seconds before you wince, falling back down onto the couch as you pull a pillow to your chest and allow yourself some time to relax before he comes back. 

You allow yourself some time to look around, appreciating his tidy room and the mess-free atmosphere. You can smell the lingering scent of bergamot, and you see the warmer on his desk, a candle right under it. The wall that his desk is parallel to is littered with postcards and retro movie posters (mostly Star Wars and Star Trek). There are some polaroids he has pinned up, some with Suguru and Shoko from their years in secondary school, some photos he had taken himself with his camera. His bookshelf, which is nearly leaning over with how heavy it is, is at the end of the couch, and you shift to get a better look at the books he has on his shelf. 

You’re so rarely in here, especially by yourself, so you peek around, hearing the water still running, and lift from the cushions, your eyes squinting as you move closer, trying to make out the names on the spines, your curiosity getting the better of you. 

Most of the shelves are full of textbooks from previous courses he had taken; therefore, most of them are science-related. Your eyes shift across the spines, seeing some books about botany and a couple about astronomy and astrophysics, a specific interest of his despite specializing in biochemistry. Notes are jammed into the empty spaces, and you make out his cursive on some of them, smiling despite yourself when you pull some of them out, making out his quick scribble from when he was either in class or studying. 

The bookshelf itself is insanely tall for no reason, tall enough that you’re sure Suguru or even Satoru, in his sprawling height, would struggle reaching to top, so you have to go onto your toes, stretching your calves as you tilt your head upwards to look at some of the higher shelves, pulling some books out by placing a finger on the top of the spine, careful not to disrupt anything as you let yourself get lost in the names. 

Suddenly, in the midst of all the chemistry and biology and Latin names, something familiar catches your eye, a book that was resting on its side on the highest shelf, and you struggle but can wedge yourself up on the edge of the couch to reach it.

The Count of Monte Cristo.

Your eyes widen in spite of your heavy emotions riddling your mind, and you turn it around, reading which edition and publisher it was as you scour through the pages, seeing his little citations in blue ink in the margins. You flip through the pages, each one highlighted and marked for different reasons, similar to the way you read through a book, and you close it shut, feeling like you were somehow intruding on something private as you set it back down in its initial place on the shelf until something else caught your attention. 

Familiar titles and authors all paint the top level of his bookshelf, books that have nothing to do with his major or classes or even remotely with something you think he might enjoy reading, and you almost fall as you try to get closer. 

A small box at the edge of the shelf piques your interest, and your lips catch between your teeth as you put all of your focus on this task, your nimble fingers moving closer, plucking it from its spot as you hold it gingerly in the palm of your hand, looking back to the bathroom as you hear the pipes groan as he turns the water off, an alarming sound, one that meant that you didn't have a lot of time left.

The box itself is also familiar, this one for more reasons than most, because you remember this box; you gave it to him for his previous birthday. amongst other little trinkets, finding it at a flea market, and thinking he could make some use of it. The wooden grain and the carvings on it were delicate, and your hold is even more careful as you unlock the little latch, the top lifting open as you peer inside. 

Your eyes adjust to the sight, something you weren’t necessarily expecting, as what you can only describe as junk littered the inside of it. A ticket stub from a movie he had seen, a dried leaf, candy wrappers, spare coins. You huff a little in disappointment, your nosey nature quelled by the contents within as you rifle around a little more, knowing you should stop and sit down and act like you saw nothing when you feel a glossy texture beneath your fingertips. 

Gently, you pinch it between your pointer finger and thumb, pulling it out from beneath all rubble as you hold it closer to your face, your breath catching in your throat. 

It’s a polaroid of the two of you.

You remember the night well, a couple of months ago, during the summer. The four of you and a couple of mutual friends had rented a car and had gone up to a cabin, one of the many properties Satoru’s family owned, and had spent the weekend there. Suguru had insisted on setting up a fire and eating around it, and you had huddled up next to Shoko as the night got colder. You remember the voices and the laughs and the squeals as some of the friends, people you didn’t know that well, began chasing each other, and you and Shoko watched, amused. You remember how one of the boys had been carrying a jug of water, one meant for inside, when somebody bumped into him, and he tripped, and the water came falling on you. You remember letting out a small laugh, shocked and forgiving as you assured the stranger that it was okay, shivering, nonetheless, as Shoko laughed uncontrollably. 

But above all, you remember how Satoru hurried over from wherever he was, his stare worried that you were hurt, everything shifting when he saw the playful glint in your eyes, the fireplace illuminating your features in red, yellow and orange hues as you shrugged his worries off, his hands on your elbows, steadying you as Suguru took a photo of the moment, of your head thrown back in a laugh and his eyebrows pulled into an anxious line while his lips pulled into a gentle smile, the stars twinkling in the background as he steadied you to your feet. 

You distantly recall hearing the click and asking Suguru about the photo, but hearing him say something along the lines of the lighting being too dark, but clearly that was a lie because you were holding the small photo in your hand, staring at it with no problem.

Before you can spend more time thinking about his junk box and what the hell this photo was doing in it, you heard some shuffling on the other side of the bathroom, the door clicking open as you scramble to put the box back, nearly tripping as you jump down, going back to where you were seated on the couch in a flash, appearing to look nonchalant as he stepped out. 

You don’t let your eyes linger too long on the way his shirt stretched tightly across his chest, or the way that the water has caused the fabric to slightly stick to his arms. He shakes his hair into a towel, ringlets of water falling as he pushes his hair back. You also try not to fawn too much over his mismatched pajamas, or how his trousers have prints of lightsabers in different colors all over them. 

“Hey,” he calls out gruffly, rubbing at the back of his neck as he tosses his towel into the hamper, his feet padding over to his desk as he checks the clock and then his phone for any notifications. He sighs, and your throat is dry, heart hammering in your chest as you realize a grave mistake. 

In your haste to put everything back, the careful clutch you had on the photo had appeared nonexistent, and you had, for some reason, made the blunder of still holding the photograph of the two of you resting in the palm of your hand. 

His back is still to you, and you swallow thickly, shuffling across the couch as you try to deposit it onto one of the nearer shelfs, hoping that if he were to see it he would think it had mistakenly fallen out or something less drastic, but his ears turn towards your movement, looking over his broad shoulders at the way you scramble to dispose of the film. 

“What are…?” His eyes pierce yours, and you sheepishly snap around to look at him, your hand going behind you as you shake your head, acting confused as his head tilts to the side, jumping from your seat at the edge of the cushion to your leg, angled towards his bookshelf. 

“I was just looking at your books,” you quickly state, trying to cover your ass as lips purse together to give you a knowing look, a white brow rising so high that it disappears in his hairline, one calling you out on your obvious bullshit. 

“Hm,” he hums, taking a step closer to you, his skin still glowing from the shower as he makes his way to where you were sitting, towering over you as his arms cross deliciously across his chest, “Then what do you have behind you?” 

You feign innocence, blinking as you shake your head, acting dumb as you shrug. 

“I,” you scoff, leaning back into one of the pillows as you shrug, “I don’t have anything behind me.”

“Right,” he drawls out, his voice slightly deeper, intimidatingly so as he crouches down a little until his face is to face with you, his fingers moving to poke at your arms, twisting at an odd angle to hide behind your back, “Then you wouldn’t mind if I gave you some medicine, yeah? Something that requires both hands?” 

Damn him. 

You shake your head, swallowing as you shoot him a shaking smile. 

“Not at all,” you stress, shifting uncomfortable as he nods, his eyes raking over your face one last time as he moves to his desk, pulling a drawer out, his medicine drawer, you deduce, and watch as he pulls out a bottle that seems to promise helping with stomach aches, and he turns it over, reading the label until he seems satisfied. 

He strolls back to where you’re seated, holding the medicine bottle out towards you as he patiently waits. 

You shoot him a fake smile, biting back annoyance as you shift awkwardly, wringing out a hand from underneath your body, the one that’s not holding onto the photograph, as you take the bottle from his outstretched hands. You stare at it, realizing that he’s waiting for you to open it, and if it wasn’t for the unimpressed look on his face, you’d almost wager that he was amused.

“Something wrong?” He asks, fully knowing the answer, and you shoot him a glare. 

“No,” you bite back, your other hand moving slowly, careful not to crumble or tear the film as you place it under your thigh, showing him both of your hands as you twist the cap of the medicine bottle off, “See?”

He nods, still unbelieving of your little tactic, as he takes the bottle away from you. You watch as he moves to set it down on the table, assessing the situation as he moves down in one swift motion, not giving you any time to understand what was going on as he loops one hands under your knees, another across your back as he lifts you up and over his shoulders like you genuinely weighed nothing more than a sack of flour and you screamed in horror at the rudeness of everything. 

“Freak!” You shout, your face looking at his muscular back as he chuckles, not seeing anything yet as you try to kick his face, “This is so degrading, put me down!” You scream, horrified and mortified as he pinches your calf that was near his chest. 

“Stop squirming,” he chides, but his voice is anything but chiding as he swivels around, your body jerking sideways as your head drops, motion sickness from already feeling a little off from earlier tonight, and you weakly punch his back, groaning.

“I’m going to puke all over you,” you threaten, but he just chuckles, shaking his head as he pretends to drop you, only to catch you last minute, his chest shaking with the sound, and you go to snap at him again,

 But you feel it, hear it the moment he sees the polaroid you had taken. 

He goes tense, his grip on you tightening a little bit out of shock, and he’s suddenly silent. You wince, turning around, hoping he could take the hint and set you down, and he finally does, carefully setting you on the ground as he bends, picking up the photograph from where it had fallen onto the floor, and staring blankly at it. 

Your hands clench, chest tightening as his eyes flicker from it to you, his face unreadable as his jaw clenches slightly. 

Nobody speaks for a moment, the room suddenly as tense as it was when you first entered, and you watch as he puts the photograph face down on a random shelf, turning back to you as he sighs deeply. 

“Were you…Were you going through my things?” 

The question shakes you, and your mouth parts as you clamp it shut. 

“N-no,” you finally say, “Well, no, not really, but I guess…I don’t…I was,” your head drops to your hands in mortification as you motion weakly to the bookshelf, “I was only looking at your books.” You mutter weakly, not even able to look at him as you keep your stare trained on the books and their titles. 

“I didn’t mean to see it, but…” You trail off, thousands of emotions racing through you as you try to deny it in your mind, sadness from before, anger with yourself, and suddenly feel vexation towards him for no particular reason as your eyes snap to his, “God, why do you care? It’s just a photo! I didn’t…I didn’t mean to look, but I saw that thing I gave you, and I had thought you would’ve tossed it away by now, and I just wanted to see what you’d keep in there and…yeah, fuck, okay, I looked! I’m sorry, okay? But…I mean, you keep it as a junk box anyway, it’s not like it’s…like it’s an heirloom!” You’re trying to ration and reason and trying to justify your clearly immoral actions as you ramble again, a terrible trait of yours, as he just takes it, takes your anger and your slew of words and your hurt as you feel your eyes water for no reason again as you hug your arms to yourself. 

He says nothing for another moment, his eyes dark and piercing. 

And then he moves. 

His arm reaches upwards, up to the shelf, up behind your head to where the box was resting on the top shelf, and he slowly brings his hand down, your heart in your throat as he nearly throws the lid open, beginning to pull everything out one by one.

“This,” he’s holding the ticket stub, “This is from tonight.”

Your hands instantly drop to your sides as the anger fades and utter confusion floods your senses. 

…huh?

You had just looked at the box; how did you not notice? But you look closer at it, the date and the row and seat number nearly the same as the ticket stub you had thrown away after leaving the theater in a hurry, and your eyes flee up towards him, his chest heaving as he continues. 

“This is from when we went to the beach,” he pulls out a chipped seashell, and you recognize the pattern instantly, remembering the one time the four of you had gone to the shoreline, a seashell you had picked up and thought was interesting, showing it to him before Shoko called you away, but you don’t have any time to compute that as he pulls out the next time. 

“This is from the candy you gave me during a study session we had,” he pulls out a wrinkled wrapper, “This is the hair tie you left at my place and forgot,” he has a simple black elastic band sitting in the palm of his hand, but he could very much so be holding your pittering pattering heart the more he continues, his voice quivering slightly, and you’ve never heard him ramble like this, ramble like you.

“This is the leaf that was stuck in my hair that you pulled out,” he admits quietly, holding up the dried leaf from the time you had been walking next to him in the fall, the trees shaking in the wind, giggling at his white hair littered with the colorful leaves, “These are the coins you gave me because I didn’t have any change,” he’s holding up the spare sterlings you had lent him when he wanted some ice cream but forgot his card at home, and your eyes move up and down, a strange thumping sound in your ears because you feel like you’re about to faint, and he slows to a stop, his cheeks flushed and his hands shaking as his hand fills with all of the things you have given him over the past two years, things that a normal person would have thrown away or used or given back. 

“This…” his lips tremble as he shuts them for a second, looking unlike the person you’ve begun to know so deeply as his fingers wrap around something, pulling out a neatly folded white napkin, unused, as he takes in a steadying breath, “This is the, erm, the napkin you lent me. From the night we first met.”

The box is empty now, but the room fills with moments in time, moments that you would cherish in the deepest parts of your mind before you went to bed, and pretended like they were fleeting and didn't matter so that you could face him bravely the next time you saw him. Moments that you thought he treated like normal moments in time that would pass and would never be remembered again, moments that you didn’t think he would…hold onto.

Not the way you did.

“It’s not…junk,” he admits thickly, “For me it’s not.”

He stops, taking in a deep breath as he pushes his hair away from his face, carefully putting everything back in the box, including the photograph, as he sets it down, turning back to face your stunned expression. 

“Look, have you ever seen me without my glasses?” 

You blink. Realizing that he’s waiting on you to answer, you blank before shaking your head slowly, and he nods. 

“Right, right, well, I used to wear contacts. All the time. Ask Suguru o-or Shoko but…ever since you said that you like the way glasses look, I…I don’t know, I kept wearing them, hoping you’d…” he trails off, his cheeks completely red, the tips of his ears a bright pink as he ducks his head down, scratching his nape sheepishly, whispering, “Hoping you’d maybe say it again.”

Your eyes go wide, and you blink owlishly, swearing you look fish-adjacent with the way you can only give him this look on repeat as he takes your silence as an okay for him to go on a rare nervous tangent of his own.

“When I was little, my grandfather taught me how to tie his tie. He said that I should learn how to do it by myself so that I wouldn't need any help when I grow up.”

You don’t say anything, and he doesn’t get angry at your silence, but simply offers you a small, worried smile. 

“I’ve gotten pretty good at it,” he confesses with a farce laugh, something empty and shaky, "But you always ask to tie them, and…I always let you. You’re the only person I feel comfortable with; the only person who it doesn’t feel like,” he shivered, wincing slightly as if his skin was prickling at the thought of other people touching him the way you do, “The only person who can touch me and I feel…okay.”

“I have a shelf of all the books you’ve talked about,” he persists, motioning upwards, and you slowly look around to where The Count of Monte Cristo was sitting, along with all the other books you’ve raved about in the past, thinking he’d only listen and give you kind comments, not knowing that he had gone home and sat down and read them all afterwards, “I stopped drinking whenever we go out together because you said you don’t really like the smell of alcohol on people’s breaths. I…” he rakes his hand through his hair again, a nervous fidget of his as he looks pleadingly at you, “I have my spot on Suguru’s couch because your spot is right next to it.”

“And our friends tell me that I’m not crazy, that…that I might have a chance,” he motions a shaking hand between the two of you, and you allow yourself this time to blink again, “But, I don’t know,” his head ducks as he chokes back some tears, and your eyes widen even more, your eyebrows up in your hair at this point because you’ve been rendered speechless, “It’s like any time I try to get closer to you, you leave or immediately want to be anywhere else or seem uncomfortable and I don’t want you to feel that way, especially because of me.” 

When he looks up, his eyes are glassy, looking like a stormy ocean, and you feel tears prickle at yours, your breath lodged in your throat as you try to pinch yourself, swearing that you were in some vision, but this is real, and he’s not stopping, saying the words you’ve only dreamt of. 

“I know I’m not really…the kind of person that you’d usually go for,” he explains, his voice dim, “I’m not good with literary nuances or dissecting medieval texts. I can’t read the way you read, and I’m not good with understanding people the way you do, but…I want to be. I want to be that, I want to be good for you.”

Your mouth is wide open as you gape at him, trying to make sense of the words that you could only imagine as you stared silently at him saying to you, saying them to you here. The two of you don’t say much for a second, your eyes blinking rapidly as your mind travels faster than the speed of sound, and you realize that he’s not lying or trying to make you laugh. He’s not confessing his love for another girl, but instead clutching his chest because it felt like your silence was leading up to a personal rejection, and you can barely muster up any actual words as you surge towards him, stopping his rambling as your arms wrap around his neck, knees knocking against his as your lips slam against his. 

Your heart plummets as you feel him still, his arms still at his sides as his eyes widen in shock, and you feel like you’ve completely screwed things up, going to step away before his hands shoot upwards, wrapping around your waist and legs as he hoists you up, his lips moving against yours hungrily. 

“You’re so…so stupid,” you mutter in between breaths, his lips parting yours, soft and gentle and fast and desperate as they chase the way you taste, wanting to savor the plushness of yours as you mewl at the way his fingers dig into your soft skin, moving you effortlessly towards his bed as the two of you smile against each other, laughing in the air as your back hits the mattress. He fidgets with his glasses, pushing them up with his middle finger, coming a little loose after everything. 

“Yeah?” He murmurs, happy, giddy, his eyes bright and alive and electric as he nips at your bottom lip, his own shining with spit as he ducks down again, pressing kisses to your face, and you feel lightheaded, “Tell me how I’m stupid, baby.” 

You groan, lightly hitting his chest as he chuckles lightly, his kisses moving to your cheek, across your nose, as your smile turns bright enough to power the sun for the rest of eternity if it were to die in this very moment.

“I,” you huff, your chest burning and your hands tangled in his hair, fisting his shirt as you bring him in impossibly closer, “I’ve had this…debilitating crush on you ever since I saw you,” you admit quietly, and he pauses, his sunset dusted cheeks turning into a wide grin as he huffs out a laugh and push his face away from your as you turn away in discomfiture, “And I’ve done everything to get you to notice me. I’ve embarrassed myself like, twenty times a day, hoping you’d look my way.” 

Satoru raises a slender brow, and you have the urge to pull him down by the collar, pressing your lips to his as he happily obliges, his tongue poking out to tease yours as he turns to an even bigger taunting menace as he pulls away. 

“I can’t stop looking at you,” he mumbles shyly, ducking down as he kisses your throat, and you shift slightly to give him more access, your breath catching in your lungs as his kisses turn into him sucking in a patch of skin, licking it over when he’s satisfied it’s going to mark. “I could barely focus on the play tonight because I kept looking over.” 

You let out a giggle, curling his soft strands of hair around your finger as he glances up to see your smile, pressing a chaste kiss as if he wanted to taste the way your unabashed happiness felt.

“And I try to sound smarter whenever you’re around,” you admit, and he snorts against the skin of your cheek again, enjoying how plush and soft it was, biting it as you squeal, but it was never hard enough to hurt, just experimental, and he laughs, “And you never even acknowledged the number of times I’d bring up a science-y article I had spent the entire night analyzing just for you to ask me about my stupid book report.” You pout, and he attempts to kiss it off of you, his hands roaming the exposed skin of your waist and stomach, hot against your cold self, and he rolls his eyes. 

“That’s only because I was having tiny aneurysms whenever you’d do that,” he reasons, his face morphing into something sweet and gentle and something so entirely new and…yours that you wish you could take a picture of it, “And I wanted you to know that I remembered the things you told me.” 

You throw a hand over your face, not wanting him to see the gleefulness on your face, but he just wrings your hands away, slotting his long legs in between yours as he lets out another joyous laugh.

“Come on,” he insists, nudging his nose against your jaw, “How else am I stupid?”

You let out an exaggerated groan, biting your lip as you try to think through your muddled thoughts. 

“You…you…you kept only the ridiculous things I gave you!” You argue, and he moves upwards slightly, giving you a pointed look, as if you were offending his lifeline or treasures, “I’ve given so many things and…” But you trail off, feeling his large hand gently wrap around your face, turning it to the side so you could see his room from his point of view. 

“Look closely,” he softly urges, and your eyes trail across the walls, the shelves, the tabletops, “This room is full of you.”

And he’s right. 

The postcards he has up are the ones you gave the three of them from the time you had gone to Paris with your family over the summer, picking out individual ones you thought each of them would like. Vintage telescopes and microscopes you imagined him enjoying, but never enough to actually put them up. The music box that plays the theme of A New Hope, a simple melody from his favorite movie that you had also gotten for his birthday, sits on his bedside table. The books you had found on sale about plant biology, a little thing you thought he might like, rest on top of his bookshelf. 

Your bottom lip catches between your teeth, and he chuckles at your quiet reaction, dipping down to kiss you again, wanting to nudge those sounds from you, even if he has to take them like this.

“Is this why you’d scare off any guy who came up to me?” You ask, but you already know the answer, just wanting to see the look on his face as he groaned, pinching your side as you giggle at his antics. 

“I thought I was being so obvious,” he murmured against your lips, his tongue roaming through your mouth as you part it slightly for him, eyes fluttering shut at the feeling, a string of spit connecting the two of you as he pulls away, “Everyone could see how badly I wanted you.” 

You shrug, feeling sluggish from his movements. 

“I didn’t,” you argue faintly, and he looks up, white lashes fluttering as he grins, kissing the tip of your nose as he smiles. 

“Guess I didn’t either,” he whispers teasingly, “Guess we’re both stupid for that.” 

You go to fight back, but you let out an embarrassing moan at the way his hands travel across your stomach, pushing your shirt upwards slightly as your back arches upwards to chase the feeling.  His hands are large and travel expertly across your body, as if he’s mapped out the small things that make you squirm and the things you itch for, as if he’s spent the past two years studying you instead of his dusty textbooks, and the thought alone makes you shake with anticipation. 

“Can’t believe I waited this long,” he murmurs against the skin of your stomach, kissing the plain of it as you shake with an uncontrollable giggle, “Why didn’t you say anything, hm? Did you like tormenting me like this?”

The question makes you stop.

Suddenly, everything from before comes rushing back. 

It seems like it sets off alarm bells in your head, as if you had been functioning through a rose-tinted fog for the past couple of minutes, and suddenly reality hits you because…you haven’t told him for a reason. The months and months of pining after him weren’t just because you liked torturing yourself, but because of your frankly very real fears of rejection for more reasons than one. 

After a second, you huff, hands clenching by your sides as you feel a surge of feelings, deep ones that you’ve choked on and tried to hide, and he notices the instant way you tense up, stopping his movements as he glances upwards at you. 

“Do you want to stop?” He asks gently, tugging the hem of your (his) shirt back down to cover your stomach, and you let out a delicate laugh, a pensive look on your face as you chew worriedly on your face. 

Sighing, you rub a hand down your face, sitting upright with your back resting on his headboard, and turn to look back at his desk, feeling the weight of his stare more than before as heat licks at your cheeks. 

“What about…what about the others?”

The question rings through the room, bouncing off the walls, and his brows furrow in slight confusion as you still refuse to tear your eyes away from his desk, your hands resting in your lap, and he moves slowly, his large hands encompassing yours, unraveling your fingers, alleviating the tension you didn’t know was building. 

“What others?” Satoru asks after a moment, unjudgmentally, tenderly, and caring, patient as you huff out another shaky laugh, shrugging your shoulders as they fall in a heavy drop, your chest rattling with the emotions you had been trying to kill off from the past two years.

You chew on the inside of your cheek, feel his fingers against yours, and your gaze flickers to his before going back to focusing on something to the side. 

“This is gonna sound stupid,” you preface, but his thumb presses into the palm of your hand, a small sign that he wasn’t going to judge anything that came out of your mouth because he just showed you that he kept the first napkin you had ever given him. 

“But…” you drop your head into your hands, your voice muffled as you continue, “I see the girls that come up to you. O-or your ex. Vi…right?” You peek up, and his eyes are slightly squinted, nodding slowly, as if he wants you to make your point before he says something, “And they’re just so…ugh, I don’t know…perfect? Like, they seem perfect for you. Either they’re stunning, or they’re in your major, or they’re both, or just…so different, and I feel like I’m…not…that.” 

He blinks slowly, piecing this together with the fact that he asked you why you hadn’t spoken up sooner, and his lips tug upwards in a little grin, one that makes you want to roll your eyes if not for the storm brewing inside of you, and he tugs you closer, one of his hands wrapping around your waist as he drops his head onto your chest. 

“I think you’ve got it backwards,” he says against you, his voice vibrating off of you, and you feel it shake you to your core, his hand moving up and down the expanse of your back as you hand unconsciously move upwards, back to his soft white locks, “Because none of those girls could measure up to my perfect girl.”

You stop, glad he can’t see the large smile on your face as you head falls backwards, thumping against the wood as your chest swells with joy, and when he looks up, his goofy grin could match yours, and you push him away by the cheek, but he just moves, kissing the palm of your hand as you laugh softly.

“You’re so stupid,” you repeat, but he knows you’re only masking the giddiness you feel as he nods against your hand, his eyes shimmering and bright as he sits up a little straighter, nearly encompassing you with his body as he leans closer, his nose nudging yours as the two of you smile against each other's lips. 

“You’ve got that right,” he whispers in the small space of air between you, “I’m such a fool for you.” 

You decide then that you don’t give him any more time to talk or say something else that could turn your insides to mush, so you tug him down by his neck, his lips curling upwards as they press against yours. 

He seems like he’s experimenting with kissing you, as if he knows you’re learning in real time, and has no qualms taking it slow. He lets you take the lead when you want, lets you dart your tongue out slightly, and opens his mouth to welcome you in. When you get a little shyer, he takes the initiative, hands roaming around your hips, pulling you into his lap as you mewl him again. When he could tell you needed some air, he’d pull away, kissing the corners of your lips, your cheeks that he loved so much, the edge of your brows that would pull into the cutest furrows whenever you were confused, and cherished you the way he’d been aching for ever since he saw you at that stupid English department banquet. 

You chase the feeling of his skin on yours, the way his fingers feel when they trace your features, the way his hands run up your arms, the way his palm cups your jaw. Your hands seem to have a mind of their own, his as well, as they drop down to the drawstring of his trousers, running up the smooth and hard skin of his abs, feeling greedy as you run a finger down his delicious v-line. You feel him shuddering beneath you, and you grin evilly, your mouth water as you untie his pants, your fingers running over the white tufts of hair of his happy trail, and your shuffle around a little bit to help him as he tugs up the hem of his old band shirt that you donned, and you almost let out a whine when they suddenly stop, lashes fluttering open to see what he was going to do next. 

His forehead drops onto yours, one of his arms pulling you closer to his chest, the other still cradling your face, and you see the way his face has gone pink, a light hue that you rarely see him in. 

“Just so you know, this, em, this isn’t how I wanted things to go.” 

You let out a stark laugh, your hands pressing against his as your fingers curl around his hair, tilting your head slightly to the side. 

“Yeah? How were things supposed to go?” You ask, trying not to sound too selfishly drunk on him as he shrugs, his lips pressing together as he divulges you in his own fantasies, things he’d only think about when it was the two of you together and he’d be wanting to confess his undying love for you while you’d be rambling on about John Milton or another one of your other favorite authors.

He looks shy, and you want to bite him, watching him gather up some of the courage you had kissed away as he takes one of your hands away from his arms, playing with your fingers as he pushes some of his tousled hair away from his face.

“Well, I was planning on telling you how crazy I am about you after this whole day I had planned out,” he starts, scratching the back of his neck as he turns a little red, “I had, erm, bought tickets to the museum you’ve been wanting to go to,” he says, his eyes flickering from your face to the side as his head drops, and you nudge it back up as he chuckles, “The one displaying the original copies of those old books you like so much.” 

He swallows, taking a deep breath, and then continues. 

“And I wanted it to just be us, nobody else. I would have obviously read up on all the authors on exhibit, so I wouldn’t look like a total idiot when, or if, you had come, and I’d spend the entire time sweating and hoping you couldn’t see.” You giggle, and he squeezes your hand, rubbing his thumb up and down the back of it in a soothing gesture. Your eyes drop, urging him gently to continue because you feel like you’re in a dream, and if he stops, you’re going to wake up from it. 

“Afterwards, I’d take you to this restaurant I’ve heard is good,” he grins boyishly, tongue poking in between his lips, “And when we were done, I’d walk you back to your place and…tell you that I liked you then.” 

You can’t stop smiling, and he can’t stop either. 

“Just…just that you liked me?” you tease, humming as he shifts a little, his arms wrapping around your waist, “Not to be…selfish, or anything, but I feel like this way was so much more romantic with your little box of trinkets and your rambling.” He groans, pinching you lightly as you snicker, but he ultimately shakes his head, smoothing over the place he pinched with his soothing touch.

“No, no,” he mutters, his face determined, as if he was recounting everything he had planned to say, “I’d tell you how much I liked the way you look when you start talking about your day,” his thumb brushes across your cheek, running across the soft hair of your brows, “And how much I like the way you care about everything you do and everybody around you. I’d tell you that I really like it when you tell me about the book you just finished, and how much I admire your kind heart. I’d tell you that I…I like how wonderfully weird you are, and how I wish I could be half as interesting as you are on a regular day. I would have told you how you’re always the first person I look for when I enter a room. And…” his shoulders rise and drop as he pulls you impossibly closer, “I would have really hoped that Suguru and Shoko were right about this because I’d be…a little embarrassed if not.”

You hum, pretending to think as you twirl his white strands around your pointer finger even though you feel like you’re on fire and you can’t breathe and everything feels like it’s burning in the best way possible, try not to freak out because the guy you’ve been in love with basically just admitted the most amazing things to you, so you take a steadying breath, your head tilting as you smile.

“And what if I didn’t want you to stop?” You feel heat blossom across your lungs when you hear his breathing hitch, “After…after you’d do all of that?” 

He nods, surveying his different options as his blue eyes turn into a slightly different shade, as if they were dependent upon his emotions, and his hands turn a little heavier as they roam across your stomach, up across the skin of your ribcage, and they stop right under your bra. 

“Hmm, well, I would’ve have asked you what you wanted to happen next,” his smile is wicked as his face drops down to your neck, leaving wet kisses until he ends up at your collarbone, right at the neck of your shirt as you nearly whine, feeling his teeth scrape just barely over the soft skin, “What is it you want, baby? What else would you want me to do?”

Your breathing stutters, and you arch your back a little, letting his nimble fingers fiddle with the clasp of your bra, giving you enough time to turn him down, but you don’t; you want, no, need, for him to continue. 

“I,” your breath lodges in your throat when he opens the clasps, helping you tug the straps down until your old ratty bra, the comfortable one that you were sure wouldn’t matter being worn tonight because you never imagined something like this happening, but he doesn’t care, setting it to the side as he wait patiently, menacingly, for you to find your words, “I’d probably ask you to…to come up.” 

He groans lightly, a mix between a guttural moan and a laugh. 

“Yeah?” It’s not so much a question, but a confirmation as you nod, shivering when his hands move back upwards, your chest heaving as you feel his nimble and long fingers cup your tits, his fingers running over your nipples as your head falls to his shoulders, “Then what? What would I have done after I came up?” 

You go down, you want to say tauntingly, but don’t have the willpower as his thumb flicks over a nipple, and you whine. 

“Eh, you’d, uh, I’d, we, would probably end up on…on my bed and I’d probably be wearing something cuter than this,” you try to say indifferently, and he rolls his eyes because you could be wearing faux feathers glued to the entirety of your body and he’d still think you were the most beautiful woman to ever exist, “And I’d probably be a little more confident telling you what I,” you gulp audibly, your cheeks heating up, “What I want, seeing that you wouldn’t have just seen me at my virtual lowest hours earlier.” And he chuckles, and it feels right, feels like this was meant to happen as his hands fall from your breasts, trailing down your stomach as you shuffle a little, moving to lie back on his pillow as he shuffles to, situating his body in between your thighs, waiting for your next command. 

Satoru’s grin turns soft, like he knows what it is you want, but needs to hear you say it for him to feel okay doing the thing that’s setting him alight. His hand moves, taking yours into his again and intertwining his fingers between yours.

“… what do you want, love?” His voice is thick, and it settles deep in your bones as your head falls, squeezing his fingers as you sheepishly mutter something, and he barely hears you, nudging you to say it a little louder as you groan in embarrassment, an arm flying over your face as your head falls back, not able to look him in the eyes as you timidly whisper;

“For you, like…to do stuff,” you murmur so quietly you think that your lips barely even moved, “To…to eat me out or….or whatever.” 

When he says nothing for a moment, you peek between your fingers and see his cheeks flushed, a shit-eating grin on his face as he sets his chin down on your stomach, his glasses crooked as his brow arched. He moves, gingerly tugs your arm away from your face, and sits down by your side as he presses a chaste kiss to your stomach. 

“Yeah….yeah, I think I can ‘eat you out or whatever’,” he says, and you groan ever louder, flicking his forehead as he chuckles, taking your words as the sign to go, go, go, his fingers moving excruciatingly slow as they start to tug the waistband of your pants and boxers (his, again), down, looking up at you for a little assistance, and you lift your hips, allowing him to slide them down fully. 

You blink, relaxing that you’re completely bare right now, but he doesn't give you any time to be self-conscious as his pupils seem to blow up with lust, hungrily eating up the way your pussy is glistening with want and need, his cheeks a fiery red as his chest moves in a large exhale, like the air had been knocked from him. 

His hand raises upwards to take his glasses off, but you make a sudden movement, as if your body was functioning on autopilot, when your hands wrap around his wrist, stopping him from doing anything else. 

“Don’t,” your voice is barely above a whisper, “K-keep them on.” 

His white lashes flutter slightly, and he gives you one of his boyish smiles that you love so much, his teeth shining as he presses his lips to the inside of your wrist, nodding slowly as he pushes his glasses back on. 

“If I knew that waiting so long for you to tell me that you liked my glasses would have been when I’m about to do this, I think I could have waited another couple of years more.” He says honestly, dropping himself down between your thighs, and your eyes flutter shut, head falling back on the pillow as you feel his warm hands slowly move up and up and up, parting you ever so slightly so he could situate himself better between them. 

Your mouth parts when you feel his fingers move on the outside of your lips, collecting the slick, and you hold back a wanton moan, your hands flying up to his hair, tugging him closer. You watch as he pushes his glasses up by using his shoulder to move the frames up, and when his lips suddenly latch onto your clit you actually think you’ve gone insane.

His tongue darts out, moaning like a whore when he finally gets to taste your saccharine taste, his eyes rolling back as he parts your lips, the sound greedy as he moves a thumb to circle your clit, moving down to run his tongue selfishly up and down your pussy for his own pleasure, needing to feel you or else he was going to go mad. 

“You taste,” his voice is muffled as he pants against your cunt, using a finger to move up and down the slit, “You taste sweet,” he said it like he was startled, like he had spent hours and hours studying female anatomy and how to pleasure a girl and what to do, but never could have expected this unexpected turn, to taste you and realize that you were sweeter and more delicious than any candy he’s ever eaten before, “Why do you taste so…so sweet?” 

You would laugh if you weren’t so turned on, saying some jumbled-up words as he ducks down again, your fingers digging into his scalp as his thumb goes a little faster on your swollen nub, his long pointer finger rubbing at the outside of your pussy, getting ready to push it in. 

When he finally does, your walls instantly clamp down on it, and you moan, not expecting the stretch, and he gives you some time to adjust. It’s not like you’re a prude, you’ve at least attempted this before, but your fingers aren’t like Gojo Satoru’s, and you feel like you could come just from this. 

“Feeling good, baby?” He questions, and you hurriedly nod, hearing him chuckle.

“Yeah,” you stutter out, your teeth clenched as you feel his finger start to move out, and then your mouth falls open as he starts to slowly pump it in and out of you, a mind-bending pace that has you clenching around him, “Feels good.” 

He nods, taking it as confirmation to keep going, and he switches between a finger and his tongue, darting them inside of you. He keeps his pressure on your clit, and you grow impossibly wetter when he leans down to lay a cute little kiss on it, his glasses slowly fogging up.

Gojo Satoru eats you out like you’re his last meal, like he’s been living like Tantalus for his twenty years alive, and finally, the fruit tree doesn’t move from his grasp, and he’s able to divulge like the greedy and sinful man he always has been.

Sometimes the hand that’s occupying your clit moves upwards, pulling his old shirt up and over the expanse of your torso to see your supple skin shake beneath his large palms, and he cups your tits, groaning like a slut when he feels your nipples pebble, and he pinches them between his pointer finger and thumb, twisting a little to feel you squeal, and he grins, softening his touch as he smooths it over, moving back down to your nub as if nothing happened. 

You watch from hooded eyes, watch the way his eyes close, like he’s savoring your taste. You see the way he slowly ruts into the mattress, like he was getting off to this, and the thought itself makes you gush even more. 

When he’s satisfied that you’ve adjusted to his one finger, he decides to slip another one in, and the size alone makes you whine, the stretch something that causes tears to dart in the corner of your eyes in delicious pain. 

“Hmm,” you moan, one of your hands fisting the sheets, the other tangled in his white hair as you guide him up and down, and you can swear you feel him smiling against you, as if your reactions were a symphony to his ears, “It’s not like I really have a metric but…you’re good at this.” 

Satoru chuckles, looking up at you, and the sight knocks the air out of your lungs. His cheeks are flushed, wet in the dim lighting of the room, his glasses crooked, and his hair a mess, but he looks positively radiant as his smile flashes bright. 

“I hope I am,” his voice is lower than you’ve ever heard it, and it vibrates against your pussy, “I’ve been studying.”

Despite feeling lightheaded, his statement chased you to come to your senses a bit, sitting up on your elbows as you looked at him through furrowed brows. 

“Studying?” You parrot, and he nods eagerly, his thumb putting pressure on your sensitive and swollen clit as your mouth falls open in a silent moan, barely able to keep your eyes open as he explains. 

“Mhm,” he hums, his nose, the beautiful nose that you want to kiss all over, rubs expertly on the hood of your clit as he presses chaste, sloppy kisses to your cunt, “I read all these posts and books and papers about what the best way to eat a girl out,” his voice is hoarse, licking up and down your syrupy inner walls, his two fingers never stopping their relentless pace as something deep in your stomach begins to build up, “Brushed up on some….anatomy and the sorts.”

You let out a breathless laugh. 

Because of course he had. 

“You,” your mouth clamps shut when he hits the spongy part deep inside of you that makes your toes curl, your lashes fluttering against your hot cheeks, and you can’t talk correctly but make the attempt to, barely above a whisper as you mutter, “Y-you’re insane.” 

He rolls his eyes, but doesn’t deny it as his thumb swirls in figure eight patterns on your clit, his pointer and middle fingers curling upwards, and you can’t really find it in yourself to chide him when he’s making you feel heavenly. 

You feel like you’re unraveling at his skillful hands, and it definitely doesn’t help that whenever you have the guts to open your eyes you’re met with the view of Satoru loosing himself in your cunt, as with each second that passed, he was going just as crazy as you were, and it felt like that familiar feeling of an orgasm building, but unlike anything you’ve ever felt before.

It’s almost like he knows, because he seems to go faster, switching between licking and his fingers, and your grip on him tightens, and he moans, welcoming the sting.

“Come on,” he presses, urging, needing you to finish around him, to taste your relief on his tongue, “Come on, baby, I know you wanna come.”

You nod, sweat dotting your forehead, your chest heaving up and down with labored breaths, that knot inside of you tightening as your thighs clamp down around his head, your walls pulsing around his fingers.

It gradually builds, but that feeling suddenly snaps, and you jolt, your back arching, moving into him, his fingers never stopping, his thumb and lips on your clit, suctioning in a perfect way that sends you over the edge. You clench tightly around him, creaming, spasming as you gush, your eyes rolling back in your head as you let out the quietest but sweetest moan, and when you feel your orgasms slow to a dull pulse, you fall back onto his mattress, limp as he doesn’t stop instantly. 

Instead, he lets his fingers slow down carefully, as if you’d get immediate withdrawal from the feeling of having him inside of you. He kisses your clit once, then twice, and pulls away, connected by a string of spit, slick and your cum, and when you finally have the energy to wring your eyes open, the sight of him wrecked form eating you out makes you even more wet.

You take a few moments to catch your breath, your chest heaving up and down, your hand falling away from his soft locks as it sprawls across your stomach, and you stare helplessly at the ceiling. 

Blinking owlishly, you awkwardly scootch upwards until you’re resting on the back of the headboard, and you watch as he brings his fingers up to his mouth, grinning coyly as he moans at the taste of you, and if you could, you’d pinch him, but you just weakly push him with your foot, looking away abashedly. 

“Nasty,” you whisper hoarsely, your voice gone, and he coos, crawling towards you, bringing his face towards yours as he nudges his nose with yours, and you’re weak, giving in as he hungrily presses his wet lips to yours. 

You can taste yourself on him, and you mewl, feeling his tongue in your mouth, licking inside of you, wanting you to enjoy what he just enjoyed, and your shaking hands grip around his neck. He pulls away a little bit, biting your bottom lip before kissing it, and he rubs a loving thumb across your cheek, his eyes turning gentle as he peers at you through those ocean eyes through those stunning glasses you adore so much.

You don’t trust your voice, so instead you let your hands unravel from his nape, moving upwards towards the expensive frames, straightening them on his nose, making sure they rest correctly on his pink ears, and he watches silently, reverently, as you push him back gently by the chin, making sure that they looked right on the bridge of his nose.

“Hmm, looks better,” you whisper affectionately, kissing the tip of his nose like you’ve always wanted, and that seems to push him over the edge, quickly wrapping his arms around your midsection as he pulls you closer to him, falling back on the bed as he tugs you into his chest, his head resting in the crook of your neck. 

At that moment, you feel it, and your eyes blink rapidly from their hazy state as his hard-on pressed against your thigh.

“Hey,” you murmur, poking his side, but he doesn’t seem like budging, his overwhelming heat and size covering you, his thick arms not moving from caging you to him, and you can’t even wrangle free, “‘Toru, what about you?” 

He doesn’t even lift his head, just hums against the skin of your neck, his lips busy leaving hickeys all over it, ones you’re going to deeply regret in the morning but can’t seem to care right now except for the boner you’re sure is deeply uncomfortable. 

“What about me?” He dreamily replies, his voice barely audible, and you roll your eyes. From this angle, you can see the way his shirt is riding up, his abs on display, the veins leading downward prominent, and his trail of white hair is calling your name. 

You wedge your hand in between your bodies as you press against his cock, the movement causing him to yelp and shudder, whimpering against you as you snicker, sure that now he’s going to give you some more undivided attention.

He sits up a little bit, resting his head on his fist, his elbow on his pillow as he peers down at you, his brow slightly cocked, not looking impressed with being tormented like this after treating you so kindly by giving you the best orgasm of your life.

“Not nice,” he reprimands warmly, poking your side as you yelp, his finger much more sturdy than yours, “You’re not really supposed to grab dicks like that, y’know?”

Your cheeks heat at his choice words, and you shrug, feigning innocence as you bring his hand to yours, admiring the large size a syou play with his fingers, feeling more touchy than usual, and you’re ever so glad that he lets you.

“I’m just saying,” you mumble, flashing him a look that sends a nonexistent punch to his gut, the blood rushing south because you look ethereal like this, “Don’t you want me to…return to favor? Tit for tat?” 

He chuckles, his thumb moving across your eyebrow, soothing the furrow as it moves down to rub against your cheek. 

“We can do tat later,” he uses your terminology and you giggle, your lips pulling into a bright smile because you’re sitting in a post-orgasm afterglow with your crush, and that stupid theorem you had stressed over doesn’t even matter anymore because the impossible outcome is happening right now and you don’t bother with looking normal because you’re feeling anything but, “I still have a date I need to take you out on.” 

You try not to gush like an idiot, your head falling into his sturdy chest, and his hand moves up and down your back, tracing stars and circles and hearts and writing his name, as if he wanted everyone to see the invisible ink that’s bleeding from his fingertips into you.

His finger hooks around your jaw, tilting your head upwards so he can see you better. 

“You wanna date me?” You ask breathlessly with dizzingly joy, the question holding no weight because the two of you already know the answer, but he indulges you, his head falling to yours, forehead against yours, glasses sitting perfectly on his perfect face that’s pressing against your perfect one. 

“I want to be yours,” he murmurs, vulnerability thick in his voice as your lashes flutter, “So, yeah, I want to date you.” 

You giggle again, and you lift your head a little to slot your lips against his plush ones. 

“I want to be yours too, Satoru,” you say, and he groans, his eyes rolling back like those were the only words he’s been dying to hear, and he lets out a victorious laugh, something happy and sickeningly sweet because the girl he’s been in love with for the past two years just so happens to love him back. 

[secretsofchance]

me when?

[3racha-agustd]

Loves of my life ❤️‍🔥

[ryellee]

I feel like no one writes about my husband Drew starkey anymore 😓 any fic recs? Heh

[doviled]

you love how possessive satoru is.

you’re well aware that your relationship with satoru isn’t exactly normal. people seem to think you have no clue, but you’ve never been ignorant. for all the casual jokes and whining clinginess, you can tell your boyfriend is deeply, possessively in love with you.

it shows in everything he does. satoru likes to hide it behind a veneer of playfulness. you don’t mind. in all reality, you find it pretty cute—the doting, the teasing, the silly jokes that all veil that intense want that lurks in him. he wants you so bad it’s impossible to ignore. no, more than that: he needs you so much it bleeds into everything he does.

he’s teasing when he winds an arm around your waist, joking when he drops his chin on your head and pulls you away from whoever you were talking to. there’s a casual, unspoken jealousy to the action, but he’s so good at pretending it’s just gojo being clingy. it’s just what everyone expects of him. you’re the only one that knows better. you can see the angry glint in his eye, hear the way satoru’s heart picks up in his chest every time you reciprocate. you’re the only one he lets past infinity, the reason he’s been working to make it cover you as well. he just can’t bear to see other people touching you—you don’t blame him, do you?

best of all, you’re the only one that sees him desperate, that gets to watch him unwind. he worships you. you don’t have sex as much as you make love, his hands roving your body and plucking sweet moans from between your lips. satoru will murmur as he takes you, voice unbearably vulnerable and unspeakably intimate. “no one else can make you feel like this, baby,” he says on a moan. on the next, quiet and sure, “even better, i’m the only one that gets to see you like this. they don’t even know what they’re missing out on. i won’t let them ever find out.” he holds you tightly, kisses you ardently, and if you let him, he’ll fuck you until his legs give out. until he has no more love left to give.

so maybe you’re a little too encouraging. so what? who cares if you let your gaze linger on another man just to watch satoru’s eyes sharpen? what does it matter if you’ll play ignorant to another man’s advances, just to revel in the way satoru steps in and stakes his territory?

sex like that is even better. satoru gets mad, possessive—not at you, never at you. but your entire body becomes a canvas for him to stake his claim on, and it makes him rough. he’ll grip you until you bruise, kiss you until your lip splits, fuck you deep and hard so that you wake up the next morning sore, just so he can dote on you all over again.

“he’s so needy,” utahime complains to you one day, after he’d dragged you home from an event. he’d claimed he just wanted you all to himself for a moment, to get away from such boring company. it’s more honest than everyone suspects. he really does hate to see you talking to other people. “he wants to leave, and you leave. he hates when you talk to other guys. i swear, whenever you’re not paying attention to him, it’s like the sun’s frozen over. and then he has to act up until you’re looking at him again. how can you handle a guy that clingy?”

“i think it’s cute,” you reply. “i like how much he likes me. makes me feel like i’m the only girl in the world, you know?”

utahime snorts. “he sure seems to think so. remember last week? it’s like he didn’t even realise that girl was flirting with him.”

he hadn’t. or maybe he had, and satoru simply revels in your jealousy as much as you do his. you’d attached yourself to him like a limpet, fingers curling around his bicep as your head leant against his shoulder. you were polite to a fault until you chased her off, so clingy that satoru couldn’t tear his eyes away. in the end, he’d barely said three words to the girl before you monopolised all of his attention. he’d grinned wide and proud, and been twice as clingy as you were thereafter.

(when you got home, well. you’d been on top, riding him to a slow climax while he stared up at you worshipfully. his thumbs rub circles into your thighs, and with every rock of your hips, he lets loose an unabashed groan. he’s so free in his pleasure, so open about how good you make him feel. satoru never lets you doubt how perfect you are for him.

he comes first, for once. heaves and whines into your mouth even as he tells you to keep going, tells you that i’m sorry i want you so bad, baby. that doesn’t mean you need to stop—take me for all i’ve got, kay? he whispers those promises until you follow him over the edge, curled on top of him and breathing deep against his collarbone.

“you’ll never leave me, will you?” he asks, except he doesn’t say it like a question. he says it like a vow.

“never,” you promise. “you’d be dead before i let you get rid of me.”)