I Have Two Braincells And Both Are Rentals

(Rylara, She/Her) || 20 || bi as fuck || poly and proud || prolly arospec but I’m kinda busy studying rn so I’ll figure THAT out LATER || pls don’t DM unless we’re friends || no coherent theme, we put all our special interests together and die like men || current special interests: Dispatch, Danganronpa

[rylarathebrave]

Alright, guess we’re doing this. Friends/people I know outside of the tumblr nsfw/nsft space, ignore this post.

I’m an adult woman who experiences desire (who knew?) and thus have a side-blog that is less than family friendly to put it lightly. However, the way tumblr works means that my “likes” on nsfw/nsft blogs appear to come from this blog. There’s no way to change this that I know of.

When this occurs, the respectful thing to do for whomever I’ve liked a post from is to either not interact or to interact with my nsfw account (since that’s the reason I have it).

The disrespectful thing to do is try to contact me on this blog.

But the EXTREMELY disrespectful thing to do? DM me/send an ask saying that I can’t possibly be aspec/arospec if I’ve liked someone’s nsfw post. To the person who did so this morning under the guise of “celebrating” me “moving further away from aspec :)”, I wish for you a life where you learn basic human respect the easy way rather than the hard way.

I prefer to keep my nsfw and main blogs separate, so I hoped I’d never have to make a post like this, but today showed me that I need to set firmer boundaries.

If you’re a nsfw/nsft blog and I interact with you, please do not interact with this blog except to ask for my nsft blog. I’ll happily engage with you from the blog I’ve made for that purpose.

Thank you!

[bw902]

definitely my two favourites so far 😭

[sapphicsundial]

OBJECTION! That’s not evidence, that’s Mr Paper 😱

[h3lllh0undart]

Ratoutoulle on the Gamecube my beloved

[tremendous-amount-of-ships]

I've had a thought!

Robert has been a loner for a long time, so going from zero friends to an entire group is overwhelming.

Z-team tried to make plans and hang out as a group but Robert gets overstimulated really fast.

This can lead to Robert getting a little...toothy, or can send down a small depression spiral.

Either one isn't good and it gets to the point that Robert starts to withdraw. He hates feeling like he ruined what should be a fun time and starts to think that he's just not made to have friends.

Obviously, the Z-team strongly disagrees but they don't know how to help.

Until Flambae brings it up with his therapist  who gives him a few ideas to try, (as well as a list of therapists that Chad gives Robert in private)

Instead of making plans together as a group in large public settings, they start with one on one plans in calmer settings and work their way up.

Coupe goes over to Robert's apartment with a few books and they spend the afternoon reading quietly.

Chad invites Robert and Beef to walk around a small park that he enjoys taking pictures at.

Sonar invites Robert over for nachos and gaming.

Prism has Robert hang out while she does chores around her house. She enjoys the company while she cleans and is less likely to put them off if she has someone over. (Chad used to come over but they got distracted easily)

Malevola takes Robert surfing, she's got a list of beaches that are pretty chill. Robert can't stay on his surfboard at all, but he's determined to get there one day.

The team and Robert love this one on one time and slowly they start adding people to hang out.

For example, Prism actually loves video games of all kinds. Sonar is terrible at Just Dance but makes up for it with enthusiasm. They introduce Minecraft to Robert and are blown away by his builds.

Eventually with this method and Robert's therapist, they get to a point where the whole team can hang out and they celebrate by going to Legoland.

End of thought.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

characters whose sexuality is "i'm under way too much stress to figure that shit out rn"

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

character whose gender is "im probably nonbinary but im on a quest so idrc about that rn"

[metapianycist]

every time i talk about eugenics abortion being bad, people assume i want to legally ban or restrict abortion of disabled fetuses, instead of noticing that sex-selective abortion is a similar issue with similar solutions that have nothing to do with legal anything.

disability activists generally want the following things, in order to reduce eugenics abortion:

- no more pressuring pregnant people to abort disabled fetuses or shaming them for choosing to carry the pregnancy to term (in case you’re wondering, doctors absolutely do this) - no more pressuring disabled and/or mentally ill pregnant people to have abortions or shaming them for choosing to stay pregnant (doctors do this too) - no more devaluing disabled people’s lives in pro choice rhetoric, such as by bringing up disabled fetuses as an argument or “gotcha” when arguing with people who think all abortion should be illegal - active valorization of disabled people and involving us in the leadership of pro-choice organizations - pro-choice organizations addressing the prevalence of doctors and society pressuring people into eugenics abortions - pro-choice organizations actively challenging and critiquing ableism in their movements, historically and currently - establishment of better support systems for disabled parents and parents with disabled children - better health care and better access to it

disabled people who criticize the eugenics abortion are not your enemies. we don’t want to force or pressure anyone to stay pregnant or to terminate. please acknowledge that it’s frankly terrifying for us when a fellow pro choice person directly defends the ethics of eugenics abortion to us.

[certifiedsexed]

Certified Sex Ed Post!

[certifiedsexed]

hi, I’m asking for some clarification on the idea that Virginity is a social construct. the thing I actually understand and AGREE with the points and explanations on why, but aren’t those just the connotations around being a virgin, not the actual concept of being a virgin. I wholeheartedly agree that being a virgin shouldn’t be seen as more “pure” and “innocent” but like, what’s wrong with “person that has not had sex before”?

Hi! So, you've practically invited me to ramble, Anon, I'm so excited. T_T

To be clear, this is a great question!! Thank you so much for being interested in learning!

Let's start with the fact that "virgin", by definition, has not ever meant "person that has not had sex before".

It's a term that's specifically, repeatedly, worldwide, has been used to refer to women and girls who have not had "sexual intercourse", specifically "PIV" sex. It's still used that way, in many places, all over the world.

It has many, many definitions, I don't deny that. The closest it's got to what you're talking about is "person who hasn't had sexual intercourse", which is not the same as "person that has not had sex".

There are many ways to have sex without having intercourse. Masturbation, for example, is a type of sex and yet, people who have only masturbated still count as virgins. In fact, in many places, you can give and receive blow jobs, anal sex, oral sex, mutual masturbation and still count as a virgin!

As a Sex Ed Scholar, I think it's very important to acknowledge that things like masturbation, oral sex, etc, are all types of sex. Not just because it's misogynistic and cisheteronormative to claim they aren't but because we live under a culture that encourages rape and general sexual abuse.

To not be clear about what is and isn't sex is very dangerous and plays into rape culture.

I also think it's important we ask ourselves why we need the term virgin. Do we? What purpose does it serve? Do we want a word for people who have not had sex, or people who have not had sex with others? Why?

[Maybe to talk about STI/Ds? Except people who haven't had sex at all can still have an STD! So. not that.]

Maybe you want it for some type of research! But why virgin specifically, a term with a million and one bigotries dragging behind it? Why a term more insult than objective? Why a term that many people will not identify with, or even want to be involved with?

Why not create a new term altogether?

To be clear, I don't think anyone is evil for using the term virgin. But I think maybe we should consider if we're past the point where we need to be using that word at all and asking ourselves what use it even has.

Okay, I hope this helps explain a little more, Anon. If not, feel free to ask me to ramble more. I love discussing this shit, you've hit the jackpot, so fr, if you didn't understand or wonder more, knock yourself out. <33

[purlturtle]

I'd also like to add a bit more explanation on the phrase "social construct", because we have SO MANY of those!

Basically, a social construct is ANYTHING, anything at all, that we as a human society have decided should exist. It does not exist as an aspect of nature, such as: mountains, the ocean, bugs, stars, cats, dogs, being an infant, hunger, sleep, illness etc. So, not just concrete things, abstract ones too! Basically anything that, if there were no humans at all, would still exist: unnamed, unresearched, but unmistakably extant.

So the stars, for example, are a thing that exists. If there were no humans, they still would - they have! Long before we existed, after all. What IS a social construct is *constellations*. Is humans looking up at the stars and saying "oh, that one looks like a person", "wow, that looks like a bull's head" "hey, that looks like a conch shell" and so on. If just one human does that, it's imagination. But, if for some reason this way of looking at a thing is so compelling that others take it up, it can become a social construct:

something that a society (not all of humanity! *a* society) agrees upon as being true.

Money is a social construct. Justice is a social construct. Time (as in, hours minutes weeks months) are a social construct - days and the year are not, however, because the sun rises without us humans and the world rotates around the sun without us too. But it's humans who took the day and divided it into hours and minutes, who took the year and divided it into months, who took days and grouped them to weeks. During the French Revolution, they switched to a ten-day week, IIRC, and ten months in a year (don't quote me on this tho). Like, there is NOTHING about nature that says a week has to be seven days long. NOTHING that says a day needs to be twenty-four units of sixty sub-units. And so on.

And that's the next thing about social constructs:

They are malleable.

What society agrees to be true can be negotiated! It can change! It *does* change! The color pink used to be seen as a manly color, because it was just a pale red, and red is so strong and virile. There are cultures who have two different words for light blue and dark blue, but no word that means just "blue". Unibrows and dark, visible facial hair were a desirable beauty standard in at least one culture.

Even justice! Even money! I'm old enough to have witnessed Europe switching to the Euro, from I don't know how many individual currencies. From one day to the next, we all agreed that *these* printed-on bits of paper could *now* be exchanged for goods and services, at *that* particular rate of exchange. I also remember my country de-criminalizing male-on-male sex and male homosexuality (like in many countries, there were no laws against female-on-female sex, because ALSO these societies were CERTAIN that women could not feasibly have sex without a man present). So, again, from one day to the next an act that used to be punishable by jail, suddenly wasn't. "Justice" is a social construct. Money is one.

And virginity is too. The human hymen has not *one* way of breaking, and it doesn't necessarily break during penetrative sex. That is the *only* nature-related part of the many definitions of virginity: a state of the body of those people who have a vagina and a hymen. But this state cannot only reached by PIV sex, and so ALL the rest of our ideas around virginity are: a social construct. Something that a society agrees upon as true, something that is malleable, something that would not exist if there weren't any humans to give it that shape and meaning.

[look-something-shiny-redux]

Another facet of the social construct is that we've put sex into a special category where we have a whole special word for people who haven't done it.

Other activities don't get that! We don't have the same kind of thing for, like, "guy who's never had a haircut before."

[spicymochi]

they are sitting and pondering

[itsdefinitely]

my 100% serious deltarune comic

[post-grammatic-stress]

If you've ever told a person who's had to be bedbound for a period of time that you wish you could "just stay in bed", DO IT.

Stay in bed. For days. But don't get up if someone needs you to, or you get bored, or you get antsy. Don't do anything other than rest. Just lie in your bed, whether you need to get stuff done around the house or socialize or anything else "productive". You'll have to cancel on people, you'll disappoint them, they won't understand.

And if you're thinking, "well, i CAN'T just be in bed. There's stuff that has to be done - I have plans", maybe ask yourself why you assumed a disabled person doesn't have plans or things to do or desires.

[lupusbaby]

Some people don’t want to hear this but sometimes accessibility is not sustainable or eco-friendly. Disabled people sometimes need straws, or pre-made meals in plastic containers, or single-use items. Just because you can work with your foods in their least processed and packaged form doesn’t mean everyone else can.

[i-say-stupid-things]

i’m gonna hold your hand with a glove on when i say this

when disabled/chronically ill people tell you they can’t do something, then that is not your cue to tell them that they can actually or that they’ll always find an excuse if they’re looking for one.

when a disabled/chronically ill person says they can’t do something, sometimes that doesn’t mean it’s outside the realm of possibility, sometimes it means if they (attempted to) do that, they will seriously hurt themselves.

when a disabled/chronically ill person says they can’t do something, sometimes it’s preventative care, and they refuse to do that thing to prevent a flare up from happening/their symptoms getting worse in the first place.

disabled/chronically ill people are not “looking for excuses”, they are giving you reasons why. something they don’t even have to do! so maybe just accept the reasons they give you.

[vampiresblog]

PSA if you are a wheelchair user with a partner who pushes your chair sometimes, you NEED to make out with your partner sloppy style in public so that people know ur together. If you dont do this your partner will be mistaken as your support worker for the rest of your life. Able bodied ppl actually cannot fathom wheelchair users and disabled people being in LOVE so you really need to wave it in their face

[the-angry-acrobat]

chronic pain is kind of like your body screaming “I’m in pain” and you’re like “okay what’s wrong” and your body’s like “oh that part is actually a secret”

[fibro-memes]

[asexual-amanita]

“I never let my chronic illness stop me from doing things!”

That’s nice, I do. Not listening to my body is part of what got me this bad. Sometimes you have to balance taking care of yourself and achieving your ultimate goals.