What Are You Up To? | L.MH (½)
Pairing: Lee Minho x Reader
Summary: Minho was tired of the unwanted attention you gave him, wished you could go from his life forever. But, why he can’t stop thinking of you when you finally have gone from his life? (based on this drabble)
A/n: I really suck at making angst story, but Here’s go nothing. This will be too long to be one-shot, so I made it into two parts. So, enjoy the first part!
Your name was well known in High School.
And the same went for your love for Minho.
You were one of the many who were like Lee Minho, the handsome and charismatic President of the Student Council. Among the admires, you stood out because you were his childhood friend and was jealousy person. You were always around him and never went long without watching his every move like joined every clubs and activity that Minho joined, spamming him with love confessions, and waited for him every day at the bus stop just to went to school or went home.
To put it simply, you were a stalker.
Despite your constant courting, Minho was never interested in you and only gave you cold glances. Not like it will stop you to show him how much you love him.
All the other students had gone home, leaving you alone with the letter you currently writing for Minho. You were not the type of person who likes to write a letter, but since Minho blocked your contact, you didn’t have any other choice to talk to him. Maybe with sending this letter anonymously, he would like you back—like in the fanfictions you read.
The thought of your feeling will finally be reciprocated made you couldn’t stop squeal. You went to the student council room, where Minho might be, and about to open the door. But something stopped you.
“I hate her. Everything about her makes me sick, can’t she notice that I only befriend with her because of our parents? I wish she just gone from my life.”
You became used to the gossip and hurtful words behind your back. However, you never expected those harsh words came out from Minho’s mouth too. You knew he was cold and mean toward you, still, even though you immune to the hurtful words behind your back, you were not immune to his harsh words.
Oh, how you wished you didn’t hear it. It was not your intention to eavesdropped his talk with one of the student council and it never his intention to let you knew about it—he even didn’t know you were there since you used to like to brag in without permission.
By the way he coldly treated you, you should have taken the hint, but you just too blind (by your feeling toward him) to see it. Now you can see it clearly.
“How can you deal with her for this long?”
“Simple, just don’t pay attention to her. The more you respond to her the more annoying she became.”
Now that you know his real feeling toward you, you didn’t know if you can see him as before. You looked at the letter in your hands before ripped it into pieces, tried to hold back the tears in your eyes.
That day you didn’t visit or bother him like you used to. You just went home with a broken heart and cried all day in your room. No one was there to comfort you since you didn’t have anyone besides yourself.
Minho didn’t know if he should be happy or concern. It’s been a week since the last time you followed him around. No spam messages (that’s because he blocked you), no your annoying voices, and he almost didn’t see you outside the class without any valid reasons. One of the student councils said that you resigned from all your clubs yesterday. You even came to school on the last second before the late attendance and went straight home—which is weird since you always waited for him even when school dismissed—you even didn’t look enthusiastic as usual, minded your own business for once. He still caught you looked at him though, but other than that, you did nothing. Everything was very calm which was strangely scary for him. No one knows what you might plan.
When the lunch break bell rang, you took your lunch box and headed straight to the cafeteria to buy a drink. You were in line for ordering your drink when you heard Minho’s whine across you. Looks like the food that he wanted to buy was sold out. You knew very well that he will not eat anything without his favorite school kimchi jjigae—he can be picky sometimes, especially when you spent your childhood with him. You looked at the lunch box in your hand and back to Minho before let out a defeated sigh.
So much for trying to not care.
You approached Minho and bashfully handed him your lunch box in front of his face. He just looked at you confusedly, glanced at the lunch box before pushed it back to you, thinking it must be one of your new schemes.
“I don’t want any food from you.”
“You need it more than I do.”
“Me? Say the one who doesn’t like any food at the cafeteria.”
Why does he sound so cocky when he’s talking to you? You knew that he hated you and often complained about you, but you didn’t think he would be so hostile. The resentment towards you was deeper than you thought.
You looked at him as he stared back with a sly smirk. It seems he still expects you to flush in anger since it was he was planned, he intended to ridicule you in front of his friends to reduce your dignity and leave him alone.
“Well, then it’s your loss. I happen to made kimchi jjigae too much today and since you don’t want it, I will give it other people.” You replied plainly.
“…What?” Minho looked disturbed, doubting his ears.
“I will take my leave now.”
You turned away with your lunch box and went to the rooftop—your new place to spend your lunch break time alone, failed to notice the confused look on his face.
As soon as you arrived at the school rooftop, you slumped behind the door, sighed in relief while recalling what you just did at the cafeteria. You just talk back at him, emotionlessly. There was nothing else that you want to do besides drowning yourself because of embarrassment.
“Stupid, [Name]! How can you said that to him!?” You talked particularly to one. However, there was a part of you felt glad. For once your action didn’t damnify yourself, you can finally defend yourself without flushed in anger. Why you never thought before acted?
You sure by now the rumor about what happened just now already spread around the school.
Not like you care. You already used to not care about any rumor about you.
That noon, you spent your lunch break at the rooftop like what you’ve been doing this past week, sitting at the edge of the rooftop, eating while looking at the school field that full of students who were playing soccer until someone decided to join you just now.
“So this is where you hiding.” You turned around in surprise, eyes widen looking at your peace intruder, not sure if he knew you were there or maybe it was just a coincidence.
“Sunbae… What are you doing here?” You asked him in wonder.
“What did I tell you about calling me ‘sunbae’?”
“Don’t try to change the topic,” You took a deep breath, not believing you have to call him by his name. “Woojin.”
“I will never get used to calling you by name. Can I just call you Woojin sunbae instead your name? We even not that close.”
“Well, whatever makes you comfortable.”
“So, what are you doing here, Woojin sunbae?” You asked him again.
“Just checking my favorite junior.” Woojin smiled at you as he sat on the empty space beside you. “You resigned from the art club.”
Kim Woojin was a senior in your school. You met him in one of the clubs you joined before. Despite knowing the rumor about your love for Minho, he still sees you as a normal junior, which you thankful for. He was the only person who you can talk normally with, without arguing or sarcasm. It was also very rare to able to meet him outside the club activities since he was one year above you which made you wonder why he searched for you just now.
“Let’s just say I realized I didn’t have any talent in drawing.”
“Really? When will you stop self-degrading yourself?”
“Maybe never? I don’t know.” He just chuckled at your poor answer.
You’ve been acting weird and not like yourself these past days. Woojin noticed it and knew something else was bothering you (not because of your drawing suck reason), more like a certain person, especially after what he saw in the cafeteria. But he knew better to not force you to tell him, he sure you will let it all out when the right time.
“How do you know I was here?”
“There is no day where Minho will stop attract much attention wherever he goes and I was worried. So, I followed you.” You only chuckled when Minho’s name mentioned.
“You’ve been acting strange lately. Want to tell me what’s bothering you?”
You cupped your face as you blankly look at the sports field down you, let the silence between you two comfort you. To be honest, even though you glad you have a friend like Woojin, you still didn’t know if you can tell him about all your problems—like what just mentioned before, you only met him a few times (that’s included the club activities).
Secret supposed not to be shared with anyone or it would be no longer a secret. even if you want to share it, it supposed to be with someone you trust and close to. Not someone who you barely meet and talk to.
But then you realized, you only have him.
“… If someone hates you, what will you do?”
Maybe share some of your problems to him will not hurt.
“Why? Is someone hate you?” Woojin asked you back, voices sounded serious than usual.
It’s not like Woojin never talks seriously with you, but because he always talks you with his cheery voice and you not used to the sudden change of tone. He seemed can’t find any reasons for someone to hate you, maybe yes for your jealousy toward any girl near Minho. But other than that, you actually a sweet girl with an amazing talent in drawing. You just didn’t know how to control your love for Minho.
“They didn’t say it directly to me, but yeah, they hate me very much—”
You remember clearly how Minho said he resents you that day, to thought your childhood friend only befriend with you because of your parents, It really hurt you bad. The wound in your heart still fresh and It will be hard to heal.
“—I don’t know myself yet but seems like everyone except for me already made their conclusions.’
“Me too.” Your eyes widen, glanced up in surprise. “There was a time where people see me as a punk just because I kept made troubles in school. Someone like me has no future.”
Your eyebrows furrowed in disbelief. Kim Woojin as a punk? That was a shock.
“Do I look like I’m joking?” You teasingly looked at Woojin from head to toes before laughing together. It felt much better after talked with him. “Don’t worry about it too much. Most of the people that have prejudices are people that don’t know you that well. You can be the one to fix that and if they’re people that don’t matter to you, just ignore them.”
It was easier to said than done. How can you ignore them when Minho, the one you were talking about, was someone that matter to you. Why he can’t see the good side of you like how Woojin did?
Ever since the talk at the rooftop, you’ve been hanging out with Woojin more often. You almost saw him every day right after school. Let’s just say the lad asked you to join the art club again and after a few considerations and persuasion, you chose to join again. You still remembered how happy he was when you entered the art class and sit at the empty seat near him while saying “I will stop underestimate my drawing skill. Please take care of me again, Woojin sunbae.”
You never realize that able to talk and complain about your days with someone comfortably was actually… something. It made your heart warm and fuzzy with happiness. Without you realized, you always smiling whenever he was around until your cheeks hurt which not go unnoticed by the others. Especially Minho.
Talking about Minho, you could see how he frowned whenever you talk or smile at Woojin. He never wanted to admit it, but lately, he felt strange. Way too strange for him to understand. When you were not around him, he felt blissful. For once he can finally stop worrying about how to avoid you and your jealousy. But it was not for a long time.
Your relationship with Woojin became the hottest gossip in the school. Many people assumed that you tired of chasing Minho and changed the heart to the senior; assumed that you and Woojin are dating; and what worse, you just used Minho to gained Woojin’s attention. But it’s all just rumors-you’re not dating Woojin and who said you had moved on from Minho?
No matter how cold and harsh he was to you, you couldn’t find your heart to hate him. You still love him, your stupid heart always has forgiven him no matter what he did. You maybe couldn’t erase the hate he has in his heart, but at least you can change his perspective of you-by stay away from him. It’s your way to fix the problems you caused to him.
However, it’s not helping nor fix anything. The sight of you smiling brightly to Woojin only made everything worse, Minho didn’t know why but it made his blood boiling. There was nothing that he wanted to do besides wiping the smile on your face. How can you never smile like that to him? All you ever did was only annoyed him.
Why you keep appearing in his mind?
It was another boring day in high school. Instead of blabbering of how the students focused on their study, as usual, the teacher told them about the upcoming school festival where every class has to contribute to the event. Your class decided to do a—as cliche as it sounds—Snow White play and that was how class became busy with the voting for the casts.
“Now, we need to choose the cast for ‘Prince Charming’ and ‘Snow White’. Who wants to volunteer?” Hyungseo, your class president, asked the class.
“I think Minho and [Name] will suit those roles.” Suggested one of your classmates. The other agreed as they talked about how you two were actually good at acting.
Minho wanted to protest. First, because he didn’t want to be the actor-specifically become the main character. And second, because of you. He still remembers the last drama you two participated—how you won’t stop bothering him during practice, indirectly disturbed the practices. However, despite his silent protest, he didn’t say anything out. Admittedly, your acting skills were indeed good. You were able to capture people attention, making them focused on you like you are the main character in the drama.
Since no one else volunteers themselves for the roles, Hyungseo took the suggestion and wrote Minho’s name for the ‘Prince charming’ roles and right before he was able to write your name, you interrupted him.
“Can I be excluded from the play?” All eyes were set on you, especially Minho. His eyes widen, still not believing his ears.
[Name] refused her dream role in the school play, the main role? Minho couldn’t help but wonder, what is actually in your mind? Why you’ve been acting strange lately? What are you planning to do? Is this your plan to make him look at you? ‘Cause you know what, your plan was working.
You could feel the stare he sent to you, not knowing it was a hate stare or disappointed stare. You knew you will regret your decision since to able to play as the main character with Minho was your biggest dream. But it was for the best. The play will never be a success if he plays with the person he hates the most.
“I think Chaeyeon will suit the role better than me.” You smiled at Chaeyeon then back at Hyungseo.
“Well… I guess as long as she fine with it.”
The ring of the bell ended the class discussion about the school play. You sighed as you saw the names on the whiteboard. For the first time, your name was not on the list of the school play casts. You didn’t bother to even look at Minho, assuming that he might be happy and smiling right now.
Out nowhere, Minho suddenly gripped your right hand and pulled you out the class, not caring the teacher who was about to enter the class calling you two. You weren’t able to say anything, still stunned with your current situation as you followed him to not know where. Even if you want to protest, you can’t, his grip on your hand was too strong.
“Let me go! Ya, Lee Minho, you’re hurting me!”
He finally stopped, hand still gripping yours.
“I’m hurting you?” Minho turned to face you. Your confused look and attempt to break free caused him to scoffed. “This is still nothing compared to what you did to me all this time.”
“Why did you reject the offer?” Something about the way he looked at you was telling you that he was mad. But what’s caused it? You didn’t know. You haven’t tried to talk to him for a few weeks now. What you know was he hates you and you’ve been avoiding him for good. So, Why is he mad?
“I don’t know what are you talking about.”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about. The main role, [Name], why did you reject it?”
“Why do you care?” You asked him back, tried to stay calm as long as you could. There is no use to snap at him since it’s only waste your energy.
“I don’t know what are you planning, but you better stop it. I will never look at you or even like you. I—”
“Don’t you tired assuming that I still like you?” Lied. You actually still like him, no one can occupy your heart like Minho did. “W-what?”
“You hate me, yeah, I know.” Minho’s breath hitched. That’s not what he actually wanted to say to you. But, what do you mean you know?
Don’t tell me… she heard it?
“I heard everything, Minho. That you actually hate me, how you wish I’m gone from your life.”
“You don’t need to lie anymore. Thanks for being my friend for ten years, even though it was forced.” You yanked your hand from Minho’s grip and walk away, not caring to look back despite how hard your heart wanted to stay. At that moment, he realized he just made a huge mistake in his life.
pixelskylines
titsay
discoholicmusic
jacobvanloon
dededos
areudirty
janainaart
theartofmadeline
