did you look at the moon

why do fireflies have to die?

[black-culture]

Yeah sex is cool but have you ever been on tumblr before December 17 2018?

[too-haught-haught-damn]

[catchymemes]

[link-the-feral-anon]

When you remember the anti-vax movement

[burger-prince]

[sadrectum666]

well this didn't age well

[mr-crocodile]

[xxtc-96xx]

[ryd-re]

I would give my first born son for ao3 to have recommended fics the way youtube has recommended videos 

[soapulp-deactivated20200310]

not evil anymore i want to be loved now

[soapulp-deactivated20200310]

evil again

[demichii]

🦇 🕯 🦇

🖤 you 🖤

🕯 will get 🕯

✨🕷 MCR 🕷✨

🕯 tickets 🕯

⚰️ 🕯 ⚰️

[pochacco]

[puckish-agent-of-change]

shout out to all the kids who aren’t good at what they’re passionate about, and who aren’t passionate about what they’re good at

[fandomdeluxe]

This is serious.

[mvnicx]

[srsfunny]

Everyone liked that.

[sugarsculls]

[isiyamor]

[anotherlesbianandwhat]

xxx

[fuckyeah--fitlesbian]

Follow my instagram

[fuckyeah--fitlesbian]

Follow me on instagram for more fitness inspiration

[catchymemes]

[link-the-feral-anon]

When you remember the anti-vax movement

[burger-prince]

[memescomedy]

[markwateneymemorialcrater]

there were better ways to do this. those signs do come off

[neonprotagonist]

they actually grow back when you try to do that though. like lizard tails.

[flores--silvestres]

Just gonna leave this here 😊

[dancing-cockroaches]

[kaity--did]

New post series: things my husband has said that have made me scream laugh

1. Playing Breath of the Wild, Zelda is crying into Links shoulder: "Listen lady, I do one thing real good and this? Ain't it. Lemme stab something for you"

[kaity--did]

2. The Roomba couldn't get into the bedroom so it started beeping for help: "That would be like if I bashed my head against the door 5 or 6 times and then just started screaming HELP ME HELP ME to no one in particular"

[kaity--did]

3. "I think I scared the mail man today. I reached my hand out the window and said letter please and he yelled what the fuck. Which was unnecessary but understandable"

[kaity--did]

4. "I passed the bar so now when we get tacos on Sunday it's a celebration and not just me sobbing into a burrito"

[kaity--did]

5. *holding our cat in the air so I can see him over the shower curtain as I am shampooing* "THE BOY WISHES TO SAY GOOD MORROW"

[kaity--did]

6. *In reference to Stephen King's distaste for the president* : "I'm just saying when a guy who's had cocaine induced visions of the cosmic hell-beast coming to punish us for our transgressions tells you someone is bad news why don't we all just fucking listen?"

[kaity--did]

7. "Google photos called me out over how many memes are saved on my phone and it upset me"

[kaity--did]

8. "How about we have Mac and Cheese again for dinner tonight and also every night for the rest of forever until we die"

[kaity--did]

9. " I fully expect that cat to sit at the foot of my deathbed and laugh with a human voice as I take my last breath"

[kaity--did]

10. Yelling "LIFT ME PEASANT" every time our cat meows at me while I lay on the couch

[kaity--did]

11. "what if we just fucking buy greenland" sounds like something you would say while drunk" - crouches down real low and in an angry whisper "this man is the fucking president"

[kaity--did]

12. This whole interaction

[kaity--did]

13.

"I have a lot of thoughts to get out while I'm on lunch I apoloy.

Apologize.

Yeah clearly I mean "apaloy" thanks google you cracked the fucking code'

[kaity--did]

14. "So one lemon chicken, one carne asada, one omelette and two happy boys" [aka taco bowl, while ordering dinners for the week]

[kaity--did]

15.

[kaity--did]

16.

He's decided he wants to learn to bake bread

[kaity--did]

Did you think I was done?

17.

"it's not that I want you to do all the upstairs chores it's that I want you to stop hoarding all your dirty towels up there like a tiny Smaug! "

[kaity--did]

18.

"I'm not upset at all it's just that this isn't the first thing that has ended up in the bushes that doesn't belong there because of the way that you are."

[kaity--did]

19.

Me: I think in this situation you are the sugar daddy. You provide the sugar

Him: (110% serious, staring at me in confusion): I - I bought you Reece Cups this morning!

[kaity--did]

20.

" There is a little marrionett inside his head that starts dancing faster and faster to circus music whenever he panics"

[kaity--did]

21.

"Schrodinger over complicated things! Schrodinger forgot the word "maybe" exists! I don't know things all the time! No animals have to die for me to say "dude I have no idea"!"

[kaity--did]

22.

-very tiny voice in the distance-

Smaug we talked about this!

[kaity--did]

23.

"There is a boy who rides real fast down our road

And Boomer wants to chase that boy more than anything he's ever wanted in his whole doggy life

The boy will fall beneath Boomer's powerful paws

The boy will be sniffed

"You! The one who rides on that piece of wood! You go fast enough to keep up with me while keeping both hands free for pets. This is exactly what I have been looking for."

[kaity--did]

24.

*our cat is sitting on the steps just watching*

*husband singing*

🎶he sits in judgement of our sins! 🎶

[kaity--did]

25.

*imitating our dog wiggling*

THIS IS AN INTERPRETIVE DANCE ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU AND ALSO HOW MUCH I HAVE TO PEE

[whitepeopletwitter]