Outward to Inward

[sahasulagna2022]

Most of us struggle throughout our lives by giving too many f*cks in situations where f*cks do not deserve to be given.

~~ Year end summary 2022

#subtle art of not giving a f*ck

[sahasulagna2022]

Such an ending of 2022

[sahasulagna2022]

But I can’t look forward. I can’t see myself anywhere. I don’t know why I have done so many things. Why everything is so fast?

[sahasulagna2022]

I don't want to know everything in the world correctly. I do want to stay in a learning path where mistakes are not toxic as such. Where I grow, I grow with others. Where I am satisfied in every sad and happy moment.

I don't want to do the greatest things. I do want to create a positive impact around my small environment from where I can see the stars. Where I walk, I walk with others. Where I sing in every low and high moment.

I don't want to be the best at anything. I do want to consistently enjoy what I am doing around my amazing acquaintances. Where I listen, I listen to others. Where I cry in every stressful and relaxed moment.

[sahasulagna2022]

A burnout day. A day when I cope. A day when I can’t study. A day when I reorganize my room. A day when I pray. A day when I sleep more than anything I do. A day when I eat not thinking about the nutritional value. A day before 4 weeks that I was afraid for no reason. A day when I realize the effect of breaking my habits.

[sahasulagna2022]

Suddenly I understand how positively I think and express my background. Whenever I think about my past 20 years of my life, I never remember the worse days if that makes sense. I remember the moments I was happy even in those apparently hard environments and relationships. My friend was telling me that I would not be able to understand their pain because I come from a very happy family background. Is it really like this? That time it pops up in my mind, truly I am so lucky to be a part of this lovely universe and have a perspective to be able to grow up like this.

I had thousands of reasons to suffer; but I choose to be happy.

[earthvideos]

[sahasulagna2022]

Sorry, world, for any of my behavior that hurts. I am not begging you to understand me, please apologise. That's enough.

[sahasulagna2022]

When I read my previous tumblr blog, I can't take the fact that I wrote some lines so beautifully. At that time I could not take the fact I will be here today. How did everything change? When??

[sahasulagna2020]

I have several experiences of doing works on a whim; still, I do. 

For some cases, those were life-changing. For some, those were adventurous. For most cases, they were waste of time.

But what I suggest is to take the last step after being mentally “ready”: don’t deceive yourself. You know yourself the most. 

I do mistakes. She does mistakes. She learns from it; I stress out thinking “I did mistakes”. Result: she has already changed the game. I repeat the mistake again and stress out.

[sahasulagna2022]

I still desperately DO

[sahasulagna2020]

Starting to walk alone

In case you have learnt swimming in a traditional way, you should know it that first time, a teacher gives a support to the learner and the learner tries to survive in the water thinking s/he has a companion to support. Meanwhile, a time comes when the teacher makes the learner free and the learner still tries to swim assuming the presence of the teacher.

The moment the learner sees back ,realizing that he is alone, gives him two feeling.

1. The instant void feeling

2. The aha moment that yeah! I have learned it!

I know I am going through a path in my life when I saw behind, I saw none to guide me to my path. The aha moment is still ahead. But I know I am learning an invaluable skill

to walk alone.

( Don't get it otherwise. I am not saying that I don't have any well wishers, family members, friends to support me. Of course, they are beside me. But that's another part. To get my dream fulfilled, I need to take further steps where none will accompany me. And it's not bad. It's necessary for everyone to be self dependant. Some learn it fast; some do not. In case of me, it's harder. But I know I can cope up with it.

If you want to get something, you need to sacrifice other as well.)

[sahasulagna2022]

Out of context, I can swim now

[sahasulagna2022]

🏃‍♀️

[mienar]

a moment with the night (before the sun greets hello)

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[nemesisalo]

@sahasulagna2019 @sahasulagna2020 @sahasulagna2021 don’t know where you come often

[sahasulagna2022]

Study? Yes

Overthink? Yes

[sahasulagna2022]

I can't be enough grateful to the person who decided to send me here. Nature, where I discover myself.

[sahasulagna2022]

My wholesome study set up in Library's 7th floor and definitely the start of study bloggg (not pressurizing me to continue tho) (but will 😩😂)

Start of in person class - February 7, 2022

&& Time with Cafe Mocha &&

[sahasulagna2022]

This is February 6, 2022, almost 20 years since stepped into this world