This is based solely on vibes, what little I’ve seen of them in the manga and of course, other fics. So don’t put too much stock into them, it’s just good fun. (Unfortunately I don’t think Ken Wakui is really interested in making anything like this canon lmao!) I’ve never publicly shared anything I’ve written, so be kind and but let me know what you think! ♥
Can you tell I’m obsessed with Ran? Technically Takeomi’s is the longest, but I just went off on a tangent and I love cuck Takeomi even if it’s not accurate lmao.
Warnings: Mentions of drugs, degradation, exhibitionism, body worship, group sex, squirting, smoking, slight sadism, generally popular bonten kinks, some descriptions of male genitalia, one mention of specific body preferences (Mocchi), one mention of female anatomy (Sanzu), one mention of squirting (Takeomi) but I figure
Nothing too crazy just your typical smut HCs. Let me know if there’s anything specific I should list, i’m not exactly sure!
Word Count: 1,300
Disclaimers: Skin color not mentioned, Body type not mentioned (once in mocchi), gender not explicitly mentioned for 99% of it, Somewhat Bonten x Reader kinda?
Dick does not match the man. Larger than average and girthy. Very veiny and intimidating.
Super cocky about it too. Doesn’t flaunt it publicly but in bed he likes to make a spectacle about it.
Selfish lover, but doesn’t neglect you.
Pansexual. Just likes what strikes him in the moment.
Not a relationship type of guy, prefers multiple non-exclusive partners.
Hard to get to know him personally, it takes a long time to become more than just a frequent sexual partner.
Often hosts big fancy orgies.
Will not call you after, unless you were exceptional in bed. In which case he’s just calling to invite you to the next orgy he’s planning.
MIKEY
His dick is a little smaller than average, but boy does he know how to use it. Very experienced in bed, naturally good at it.
The catch is that he’s got very low libido. Because he’s depressed he doesn’t really care about sex most of the time.
Occasionally he has sex because he’s having an *unidentified emotion* and wants to distract himself.
When he’s in a relationship he tends to use toys to help get you off because he doesn’t want to leave you unsatisfied but doesn’t have the mental capacity to put in the effort.
His favorite way to get off is just watching others fuck in front of him while he masturbates in the corner.
Yes, he frequents Koko’s orgies, but never actually participates. Leaves immediately after he cums.
It’s pretty rare, but occasionally he goes feral and all he wants to do is fuck. When he’s like this he often focuses on the other person’s pleasure more.
Gets super kinky during these episodes too, surprising even himself with the shit he does.
SANZU
Most of the time he’d rather do drugs than you.
But he inevitably shows up begging to fuck you.
Sometimes he can’t get it up even if he really wants to. (The drugs mess with him!)
Swears the clit moves around. Man can never find it on the first try, but he gets there eventually.
Every time is different with him. You NEVER know what you’re going to get.
Extremely spontaneous. Likes to try new things, often in the middle of sex. One of the sounds or faces you make reminds him of something he saw online that he wanted to try!
Tends to be hyper focused on you, so when you’re not into it he’ll back off.
Heavy into exhibitionism. Doesn’t really want to get caught by strangers, but he 100% would not stop fucking you if you were.
Gets off on dominating you in front of his friends, most frequently Ran and Rindou.
Sometimes he even invites them to join, but they’re the only two he’d ever let touch you.
RINDOU
Is pretty girthy but average length over all. A real crowd pleaser.
Comes across as intimidating and domineering so people assume he must be the same way in bed.
Nope. While he does occasionally degrade you, he’s most often affectionate and gentle.
But he will shove his fingers in your mouth and tell you to “shut your fucking mouth whore.”
Not all that vocal in bed because he’s self concious of his high pitched moans and whimpers.
But as he trusts you more and gains his confidence he gets louder. Sometimes you wish he’d be a litter quieter.
Secretly loves when you dominate him but will never say it out loud. His body betrays him every time though.
Gets rock hard when you’re frustrated, annoyed or angry.
KAKUCHO
Another gentle lover.
Unlike Rindou he never degrades you - even if you ask. It upsets him! He doesn’t ever want you to hear his voice saying mean things.
He’s SUPER into body worship and praise, both giving and receiving.
Man has NO QUALMS about focusing on your pleasure and does so naturally.
Can and frequently will cum untouched. Especially when you’re coming on his face.
Loves being edged and overstimulated.
Nervous about trying new things, but is generally down for most things if you’re serious about them. (but won’t do any mean stuff!)
TAKEOMI
Can make any woman squirt. Repeatedly. Absolutely bonkers for that shit. He wants you to squirt all over him and in his mouth.
Will light a cigarette during sex. You’ve learned to deal with it.
Sometimes he purposefully lets the hot ash fall on your body. Your surprised squeal drives him crazy.
Will absolutely degrade and get rough with you.
But his aftercare is immaculate. He pampers and praises you! If you want something from him, this is the time to ask because he’ll agree to almost anything and he always keeps his word.
Is confident in his abilities, but if you pay attention you’ll see that he’s also constantly worried he isn’t pleasuring you enough.
Likes getting cucked but really does it so he can see how you react with other men. (And if he can do more to please you in different ways.)
Because he doesn’t trust easily the list of people allowed to do this is short.
He briefly considered asking Ran but...he’s certain Ran would steal you away just because he can then throw you out the next day.
Thinks you’d genuinely fall in love with Kakucho and leave him.
Will not let Sanzu anywhere near you. Even in everyday situations.
Knows Mikey doesn’t care to have sex with you but tries letting Mikey watch the two of you a few times.
Begs Rindou to fuck you in front of him, partially because he keeps to himself and Takeomi somehow guessed he’s affectionate in bed.
But Rindou always turns him down.
Basically, his only options are Koko and Mocchi.
He knows Koko is experienced and emotionally detached from sex. His number one choice. He obviously agrees and honestly gets way too into it. Totally degrades and teases Takeomi.
Mocchi (when not in a relationship) is not only the opposite of Koko but also very laid back.
RAN
Dick is long and lanky like his body. He keeps it very well groomed with a small patch of hair.
Fuck boy til the end.
Has the V-shaped sex lines. Loves to show them off and brag about them.
Generally doesn’t get into long-term relationships, even if he is being monogamous (which is already extremely rare) he refuses to put a label on it past friends with benefits.
Prefers hookups and one-night stands, but has plenty of established fuck buddies.
Literal sex God but tends to focus his own pleasure during flings unless he’s showing off or wants an ego boost. But he makes sure they always cum by the end of it.
Uses sex to get what he wants. Frequently closes business deals in bed.
Prolific reputation, everyone wants a taste.
Loves when they play hard to get so he can prove that he always gets what he wants.
Hard dom. He’ll edge you for hours and if you get to cum, you either have to do it yourself or not at all.
Sometimes he’ll overstimulate you just to prove a point. He’s in control. He can make you cum whenever he wants.
Extremely playful in bed, always wants to try new things (as long as he’s in control).
Really into BDSM and uses toys regularly.
Sometimes he gets hard while tying up a hostage (oops).
MOCCHI
Likes doing things the way he always has. Not interested in trying new things.
Vanilla, but on the rougher side.
Very little aftercare past tossing you a rag and cuddling.
But mostly because he doesn’t know what to do- if you tell him what you need he’ll do it!
Loves manhandling you!
Not picky about his lovers bodies but he gets really riled up over people bigger or smaller than him. (He wants the best of both worlds but in extremes.)
Absolutely killer when it comes to oral. He doesn’t even know what he’s doing but it’s somehow always the best.
cw: fem!reader, fingering, unprotected sex, touch starved and pussydrunk shin, not rlly proofread
wc: 1,3k
• • • 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐎 swears he must’ve done something right in a past life to deserve you.
You’re straddling his lap, your thighs bracketing his hips as your fingers fumble with his belt, lips slotting against his in slow, dizzying kisses. He’s hard beneath you, painfully so, his heart pounding so fast he wonders if you can feel it under your palm.
"You sure about this?" he murmurs, lips busy kissing along your jaw, down to your neck, leaving soft, open mouthed kisses that make you squirm. His hands slide up to trace the dip of your waist, his thumb stroking slow circles against your ribs. "Tell me you're serious about this. About us. Please."
You nod, your fingers finally slipping the belt free and moving to undo his zipper. "I've never been more serious about anything, Shin," you whisper, voice soft, breathless. "I want this. I want you."
You push his pants and boxers down just enough to free his cock, watching as it springs free—thick, flushed and leaking at the tip. Your underwear quickly follows, your hand reaching down to tuck it to the side with a soft rustle.
Shinichiro stares for a moment, breath growing shallow like he can’t believe this is actually happening. His hands remain on your hips for a moment, unsure what to do, where to start, until you take a hold of one and guide it between your thighs.
Your body's response is immediate, hips bucking against his touch, your eyes meeting his when they finally flicker up to your face. His fingertips start exploring, a little clumsy at first, but he finds your slit and runs two fingers slowly up your heat, gathering slick.
He parts your folds carefully, his thumb stretching to brush gently over your clit, tentative, testing.
"Fuck, yes— right there, just like that," you jolt, a broken moan tumbling from your lips as he does it again, slower this time. His other hand steadies you at the waist while he keeps going, his fingers dipping down to your entrance and pressing one inside.
"Fuck, you're perfect." he murmurs, more to himself than to you, his finger curling slightly, mimicking the things he saw in his favorite porn videos.
He can tell it's working from the way you start grinding down on his hand, desperate for more. "Add another— please. Another."
He obeys instantly, slipping a second finger inside. The stretch is just enough to make your thighs quiver, your forehead dropping against his as you ride his fingers slowly, moaning and whimpering with every movement. He watches you the whole time, mesmerized, his cock twitching against his stomach and leaking more precum with each filthy little sound you make.
His thumb eventually resumes its circles on your clit, syncing with the thrust of his fingers, and it isn't long before you’re clinging to his shoulders, fingertips leaving crescent shaped indents into his skin. "I'm g-gonna—fuck, baby, i'm gonna come,"
And with one last stroke over your sweet spot, you're sent over the edge, your walls clenching hard around his fingers as your body trembles in his arms, your moans muffled against his forehead as you kiss it. Shin keeps moving through it, gentle and slow, helping you ride it out.
"Can I…?" he breathes out, head tipping back to look at you through hooded eyes. "Can I be inside you now?"
You give him your consent and Shinichiro swears he’s never moved faster in his life.
His fingers slip from you, making you whine in protest, but then he’s gripping his cock at the base, stroking once, twice, before dragging the tip through your slick folds, rubbing against your clit and making you tremble in his lap.
"I won't last," he warns, his chest rising and falling in quick, shallow bursts. "fuck, I’m sorry. I’m gonna fucking burst as soon as I’m in."
He’s trying so damn hard to keep it together but you already have him teetering on the edge before you’ve even taken him in, so much that he has to squeeze his eyes shut and breathe before he completely embarrasses himself.
He doesn't see it but you nod in response, your own breath catching in your throat as you lift yourself up, one hand taking over to wrap around the base of his cock and guide him. He twitches in your palm, looking almost in pain with how hard he is.
"It’s okay," you whisper out loud, leaning in to press a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. "I don't mind."
He watches as you line him up, the swollen head brushing against your slick entrance, and both of you moan at the contact. His eyes are fixed on yours, and you take advantage of it to sink down slowly.
"Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck—" His words cut off into a strangled groan, his fingers digging into your skin in a desperate attempt to ground himself.
You slide down inch by inch, your lips parting in silent moans as he stretches you open. His forehead drops against your shoulder when you finally bottom out, jaw clenched, sweat beading at his brow.
"Wait. Stop. Stop— don’t move," he chokes out, "Fuck, I’m gonna come. Give me a second."
You still, swallowing down a moan as you sit fully seated on him, hips flush to his, the head of his cock reaching deep inside, twitching and throbbing in pain and pleasure.
"It’s okay," you repeat, brushing his damp hair back from his forehead, pressing a lingering kiss there. "It's okay. Just breathe, baby,"
Shinichiro nods, gulping air, trying to will his body to calm down. His fingers trace lazy circles into your skin, grounding himself in the feel of you. He exhales shakily and finally opens his eyes after a minute that feels like forever, meeting your gaze. "Okay," he whispers, voice thick. "Okay, I’m good now."
Then, finally, you start to move—setting a gentle rhythm at first. You ride him in slow, sensual rolls of your hips, and Shinichiro meets your movements with timid thrusts of his own. He bites down on his bottom lip, hard, mortified by the idea of spilling his load barely a minute in, but he doesn’t stop you again. His hands roam to try and distract himself instead; up your sides, over your ribs, thumbs brushing along the curve of your breasts.
“You feel so good,” you whisper, riding him gently, your body melting into his. “Fuck, baby, you're so big. So fucking deep inside me.”
“Don’t say that,” he whines softly, forehead pressing to your chest, and you laugh— your breath catching with the rhythm, fingers carding gently through his damp hair.
“You don't have to hold back,” you whisper into his hair. "Come whenever you need to, baby. It’s okay, I promise."
Shin lets out a broken moan at that, his hips thrusting up into you a little more confidently once, twice, three times, his control eventually slipping. Then he's whining out your name, over and over again in times with his thrusts, faster and more desperate each time. You tighten around him in response, clenching deliberately, your hand slipping to his cheek and guiding his face up so he's looking at you. His eyes are wide and glassy, lips parted to let out the hottest moans.
Your thumb brushes the single tear that slips down his cheek, catching it before it falls.
"I'm coming— please. Please." he moans, the words spilling from him like he can’t stop them. "I can't— hah, I'm coming,"
Then he’s gone. His body locks up beneath you, his cock pulsing deep inside as he spills into you with a drawn out, guttural cry. He clings to you like he’s coming apart, face buried against your chest, a mess of soft whimpers and trembling limbs, his skin burning at the touch.
You hold him through it, continuing to rock your hips gently, kissing his hair and whispering soothing things as he comes down.
He doesn't pull out. Not yet. His mouth finds yours again, sloppy and urgent, tongues tangling as his hand finds the back of your head, grabbing a gentle fistful to keep you in place. Meanwhile the other sneaks between your bodies to find your clit again, your entire body burning up as your second orgasm begins to build—tight, hot and unstoppable.
Summary: Shinichiro has been rejected twenty times. Determined not to make it twenty-one, he recruits one of his oldest friends to help him write anonymous love letters to the girl he’s been secretly admiring from afar.
The poems work.
The problem is…every poem she writes for his crush says a little more about her own heart than either of them realizes.
Tropes/Themes: Secret Admirer, Love letters, Oblivious Idiots in Love, Protective Shinichiro, Knowing Someone vs. Idealizing someone, Self-growth through romantic failure
A/N: I’ve never been able to accept the idea that Shin got rejected twenty times. I was like, “Hell no! Not on my watch!” So, I wanted to write something where Shin could still be himself, but like, learn to be smooth. You know?
So, I came up with this whole story that is loosely based on true events.
Anyways, hope y’all enjoy.
Happy Birthday Shinichiro!
*
Roses are red
Violets are blue
When I see your face
My heart goes boom boom like a motorcycle, vroom-
Shinichiro looked proudly at the piece of paper in his hands; his lanky frame folded awkwardly over the table as his messy black bangs slipped into his dark eyes.
“Yeah! That’s…that’s pretty good!” he said to himself as he reread the poem scribbled in his handwriting and nodded.
He narrowed his eyes, squinting at the paper, as he tapped a pen against his chin like a seasoned poet deep in thought. After a moment, he added a little underline beneath the last word for emphasis.
Finally, he added three more words to finish the poem.
Your Secret Admirer
“Yeah,” he smiled while nodding to himself, more confident this time. “That’ll do it.”
With one last satisfied look, he folded the paper carefully and slipped it into the pocket of his black leather jacket.
*
Ding Dong.
The bell to the convenience store door chimed softly as he stepped inside.
Shin kept his head tilted down slightly, trying to look as casual as possible as he wandered to one of the snack aisles. There, he pretended to skim items he had no intention of buying, but he couldn’t help but let his eyes flicker up toward the front counter.
His heart thumped.
There she was.
His crush.
Beautiful, talking on the phone, leaning against the register like she didn’t have a care in the world.
Shin swallowed.
Quick. Clean. In and out.
Come on, Shin. He told himself. You can do this!
He left the snack aisle, approaching the counter while she was turned away, and pulled the folded paper from his pocket. Sliding it beside the register, he placed it where she couldn’t miss it. Then…
He bolted.
Not out of the store—no, no. That would be too obvious.
No, instead, he ducked into one of the aisles, but for someone nearly six feet tall, this proved to be quite difficult for he was doing a terrible job of making himself small.
He grabbed for the nearest thing he could (cup noodles) and pretended to read the label all while peeking through the shelves.
The bell chimed again, signaling someone else entering the store, but he paid them no mind.
He watched as his crush turned back to the register while still talking on the phone with a friend.
Shin held his breath as he waited for her to notice. That’s when she paused.
“Wait…” she said, looking down at the little note.
His heart jumped. This is it!
She picked up the paper and unfolded it.
Shin straightened just a little, trying to catch her expression through the gaps between the shelves.
There was a moment of silence. Then finally…
“Someone left me a poem…” she said into the phone, sounding intrigued.
His chest puffed up immediately with pride.
Here we go.
He watched her read it silently.
Then her lips twitched. “Oh my gosh!”
Shin’s smile froze.
She suddenly busted with laughter—not in a mean way—but definitely amused.
“Okay, wait. This is kind of bad,” she told her friend over the phone. “Like cute-bad. Like…this is something my little brother would write.”
Shin blinked. Cute…bad?
She kept going, still laughing.
“No listen-” she read part of it out loud, barely getting through the last line without breaking. “Boom boom like a motorcycle—I cant!”
She covered her mouth, giggling. “I mean, points for effort, I guess?”
Shin slowly lowered the ramen cup in his hands.
His ears felt hot.
His smile disappeared so quietly it almost felt like it had never been there at all.
“Okay…” he mumbled under his breath to himself. “Maybe not that one.”
He then turned, set the ramen back on the shelf like nothing had happened, and walked out of the store without buying anything.
***
When he got to the ramen shop, it was fairly quiet, which was usual for this time of day in the afternoon.
Shin trudged over to the table you were at and slid into his usual seat across from you with a quiet sigh. He slouched forward, all long limbs and misery, as he rested his elbows on the table.
A few moments later, you finally looked up from your book, acknowledging him.
“Well?” you asked.
He glanced off to the side.
You waited, watching him expectantly. “How’d it go?”
Shin scratched the back of his head before answering.
“Well…she didn’t hate it…”
He paused.
“…but she didn’t like it, either.”
Your eager expression softened, just a little.
“Okay,” you said gently. “What did you write?”
Shin hesitated for just a second, then he straightened up like he was about to present something important.
“Alright, listen to this,” he said. “I think it had a strong opening.”
You nodded slowly, bracing yourself.
Shin cleared his throat.
“Roses are red…”
You pressed your lips together.
“Violets are blue…”
Your eyes flickered upward like you were already asking God for strength.
“When I see your face…”
“Shin-”
“My heart goes boom boom like a motorcycle, vroom!”
Silence.
You stared at him.
He stared back at you, dead serious.
“There’s more,” he quickly added.
“Shin,” you called again, carefully.
He stopped.
“What were you going for?” you asked, confused.
He frowned slightly, looking confused himself. “I don’t know…energy?”
You let out a long sigh, pressing a palm over your mouth before trying again.
“Okay, look. It’s not…terrible.”
He brightened.
“It’s just,” you tilted your head to the side, searching for the least painful wording. “It sounds like you’re describing a cartoon explosion or something.”
Shin’s shoulders dropped. “Oh…”
There was a small pause between you.
Then he leaned forward, more serious now. “Well, then what should I say?”
That question caught you off guard.
You blinked. “What?”
“You’re good with this stuff, right?” he said, gesturing vaguely at you and your book. “Words. Feelings. All that.”
You glanced down at your book and huffed a quiet laugh. “I’m not-”
“C’mon,” he cut in. “Just tell me what sounds better.”
You hesitated for a moment but then sighed as Shin’s hopeful eyes bored into you.
“Okay fine,” you caved. “Just don’t describe how she looks as if it’s a checklist.”
He stared back at you, dumbly. “What does that mean?”
“Like, don’t just say her face is pretty,” you explained. “Say what it does to you.”
He leaned in, listening.
You waved your hand in the air, vaguely.
“Something like, ‘when you smile, it makes everything feel lighter’ or something.”
There was a pause as Shin considered your words.
“Wait…”
He grabbed a napkin from the table and the pen still jammed in his pocket.
“What was that?” he asked, quickly.
“What was what?” you replied back.
“Say it again.”
You narrowed your eyes. “Why?”
“Just, say it again, please?”
You sighed, but repeated it anyway, slower this time.
“When you smile…it makes everything feel lighter.”
Shin’s eyes lit up.
“Yeah!” he said, excited, already writing. “Yeah, that’s good!”
You watched him for a moment, feeling a little unsure.
Something about the way he was looking at the words—like he’d just discovered something—made your stomach twist slightly.
“Shin...” you called a little quieter now. “You should really come up with your own words.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he said absentmindedly, still scribbling. “I will.”
He then looked up at you, dark eyes shining brightly. “You got any more of those pretty words, bestie?”
***
The next day, Shin stood at the front counter of the convenience store where his crush worked, holding two pieces of paper.
One with your poetic expression and one of his…
He had spent the previous night trying to come up with words of his own to express himself like you had suggested, but he just couldn’t come up with anything as good as you.
When you smile,
Everything feels a little lighter
Like the world forgets how heavy it was…
Just for a second
Shin nervously tapped his finger against your revised poem as he fought with himself internally.
Hers or mine?
He reached out to place his poem on the counter, but when he heard his crush coming back to the front of the store, he panicked.
Quickly, he set your version down on the counter, then bolted once again, the coattails of his jacket practically flying behind him.
From an aisle in the store, he watched again, waiting for her to notice the note.
This time, when she picked it up, she didn’t laugh.
She paused.
Read it once.
Then, her expression softened.
“Oh…”
Shin straightened as he watched on, his heart practically beating in his ears, but he almost could’ve floated at what she did next.
She…smiled.
Not big, or loud.
Just…real.
“This one’s actually really nice,” she said quietly to herself.
From the aisle, Shin’s eyes widened.
“Jackpot!” he whispered.
And just like that, Shinichiro figured out exactly what he needed.
Not better words.
Just someone who had them.
***
“You're a genius!” Shin exclaimed, marching straight to your usual table at the ramen shop and dropping down in the booth across from you. “A literal fucking word genius!”
You blinked up at him, unsure of what he was referring to. “What did I do?”
“Your poem! I gave it to her and she loved it.”
It took you a minute to catch up, but when you did, you gave him a look.
“Shin, you didn’t!” you said, heat rising to your face. “You gave your crush my poem?! You were just supposed to use it as a guide, not-” You stopped yourself, exhaling. “You basically made me her secret admirer. Do you have any idea how weird that is?”
Shin sighed and leaned back in his chair. “Look, I tried writing my own but the words just wouldn’t come out right. I'm just not good with words like you are.”
You sighed, shaking your head.
Shin continued to explain himself. “I was going to give her mine, but then I looked at yours and how much better it was and, I panicked. I just…didn’t want her to laugh at me again, you know?”
You softened as you watched him slump further in his chair, his expression showing his guilt at what he did.
“Well, what did you come up with?” you asked.
Shin paused for a moment, then pulled out a piece of paper from his pocket and slid it across the table towards you.
You took the paper and read the words written in Shin’s scribble.
Your face is nice
Like, really really nice
I think about it a lot
Probably too much actually
You pressed your lips together, shoulders tightening as you tried—really tried—not to laugh at the “poem.”
“How long did it take you to come up with this?” you asked. “Be honest.”
He shrugged, rubbing at the back of his neck like he was embarrassed. “Like, a few minutes…”
While this was technically true, what he didn’t mention was that this was the best one out of at least a dozen crumpled attempts, all now discarded in the trash.
“Hm…” you said, placing the poem back down on the table.
Shin straightened back up as he looked at you. “Look, I know you said I should come up with my own words, and I will. I promise. It’s just…do you think you could help me out with making them sound better?”
You bit down on your lip, hesitant to do this request of his. You didn’t want to encourage this behavior, exactly. Still, he was one of your oldest and dearest friends.
“Please?” he pleaded, his short black bangs falling into those pretty onyx eyes of his—the ones that always made you cave whenever he deeply wanted something. “Yesterday was the first time I saw her smile like that.”
He rubbed at the back of his neck again. “I just…really like her, and I don’t want to be rejected…”
Shin paused, then slowly added, “…again.”
You sighed once more. You knew all about Shin’s long history of rejections, so you didn’t blame him for not wanting to go through it again. Hell, you were terrified of rejection yourself. It’s part of the reason why you had never…
“Fine,” you agreed, before you could allow yourself to even finish that thought.
You took out your pen and pulled the note to you again to begin translating his words into something more poetic. When you finished, you slid the paper back to him. Shin picked it up immediately, eyes scanning the lines before he read it aloud.
“I catch myself thinking about you in the middle of ordinary moments, like you’ve quietly made a place in my everyday life.”
Shin whistled.
“Wow,” he said, impressed. “This is miles better than my shit poem.” His eyes then landed on you like you were some kind of wizard with words. “How do you come up with this stuff?”
You shrugged.
“Same way you know everything about motorcycles without even thinking about it,” you explained. You were always amazed at Shin’s ability to take apart then rebuild a whole bike from literally the ground up.
“It just…comes to me,” you finished.
Shin nodded like he was considering the analogy. “Yeah. That makes sense.”
He then smiled warmly at you. “Thanks for helping me out with this. She’s gonna love it. I know it. You should’ve seen the look on her face when she read the poem. I knew right then and there. I need you.”
Your brows lifted at that, your stomach doing a small, traitorous flip, but you played it off as a joke.
“Need me, huh? Just don’t expect me to write your wedding vows when you two get married.”
Shin snorted, rolling his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. One step at a time.”
***
Over the course of the next two weeks, you and Shinichiro worked on various poems dedicated to his beloved crush at the convenience store. He would spew words from the top of his head, coming up with terrible versions of his own poems, and then you would translate his babbling into something more poetic to better convey what he was feeling.
Shin:
I get nervous when you talk to me and I forget what I was gonna say. It’s kind of embarrassing. So please don’t notice
Your translation:
You make me forget what I was saying
And I don’t even mind,
Because it means I’m paying more attention to you.
Shin:
I want to be around you even if we’re not talking. It’s better than being alone. Or, with other people
Your translation:
I dream about being near you
Even if it’s in silence
It feels better than anywhere else
I could be.
*
Tonight, he was sprawled across your bed, his black shirt riding up slightly as he shifted, while one foot dangled lazily off the edge. You, on the other hand, sat at your desk with your back facing him, typing away on your laptop.
He was having a hard time coming up with his next verse, but sticking to your one condition that he had to come up with the words first before you translated, you hadn’t bothered to help him to come up with anything, despite it having been nearly an hour since he came over.
Besides, you had a paper due at midnight that was much more important, right now.
You heard Shin sigh, exaggeratedly from behind you.
“I’ve got nothing,” he said, sounding fed up. “There’s only so many ways to say ‘I really fucking like you.’”
You smirked as you paused in typing up your paper to turn to him in your swivel chair.
“Shin, I’ve been meaning to ask you, what is your end goal? Like, are you gonna ask her out? Or, are you just gonna be her secret admirer forever? What do you even want from her?”
Shin gulped like he hadn’t really considered his next step. “What I…want?”
You sighed, realizing he hadn’t even thought that far ahead and turned back to your laptop to continue typing as you spoke. “Maybe you should focus on that. Once you figure that out then you might be able to come up with something.”
Shin didn’t immediately say anything, so you figured he was considering your suggestion.
“You’re right,” he finally said after a few minutes of silent thinking while staring at the ceiling.
You nodded, pleased that he’d actually taken your advice.
“I need to go bigger.”
Your brows furrowed. That wasn’t what you said.
“What?”
“I need to do something bigger than poems if I want her to notice me,” he said, sitting upright. The mattress creaked as he swung his legs over the side of the bed. “I mean, eventually I want to reveal myself, right? So, I need something that’ll impress her. Something she’ll never forget.”
As he spoke, he started pacing your room. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes.
“Shin, I was talking about figuring out what you actually want from her.”
“I know, I know,” he said distractedly. “But if she’s gonna fall for me, I’ve gotta make an impression first.”
You sighed.
There was no stopping him once he got an idea in his head.
“Fine. What do you know about her, then?”
He suddenly stopped, grinning dreamily with that dumb look he got on his face whenever he talked about the girl at the convenience store and you rolled your eyes.
“Besides that she’s pretty,” you quickly added.
His grin fell, a frown now replacing it as he thought harder.
“I don’t know…”
You blinked.
“Shin.”
“What?”
“You’ve been writing poems to this girl for weeks.”
“I know.”
“And you don’t know anything about her?”
“I mean…” He rubbed at the back of his neck. “Not really.”
You just stared at him, dumbfounded. Somehow, that was even worse than you expected.
But before you could lecture him any further, his gaze drifted past you.
His eyes focused on your desk.
Then your bookshelf.
Then to the framed painting above your bed.
His eyes widened.
“OH!” he shouted suddenly, causing you to jump. “FLOWERS!”
Suddenly, a pen bounced off his forehead.
“Ow!”
“Would you keep it down?” you hissed.
It was late and you didn’t want him waking your roommate down the hall all because he suddenly got some grand idea to woo his crush with.
“My bad,” he muttered, rubbing at his head, but his excitement didn’t dim.
“Flowers,” he repeated. “I think she likes flowers.”
You crossed your arms. “You think?”
“Yeah,” he replied, pointing at you as though he’d just cracked a major case. “I heard her talking on the phone with a friend once.”
“Once?”
“I think so.”
“Are you sure?”
Shin frowned. “Okay, maybe not, but I definitely heard her over the phone.”
You continued to stare at him, skeptical, but he ignored you.
“And I’m pretty sure she mentioned cherry blossoms.”
Your stomach gave a strange little twist.
Cherry blossoms.
Your eyes flicked around your room.
The Sakura-themed calendar hanging beside your desk.
The pressed blossoms tucked inside a shelved frame.
The small vase sitting on your nightstand.
You’d always loved cherry blossoms.
The thought hit harder than it should have, which was a bit ridiculous. Lots of people liked cherry blossoms, after all. There was nothing unusual about that.
So why did it suddenly feel like someone had reached into your room and taken something?
“R-Really?” you stuttered slightly, trying to keep your voice casual.
“Yeah!” Shin said. “Can you imagine it? She’ll be working her shift when suddenly a guy walks in carrying a huge bouquet of her favorite flowers.”
Favorite flowers.
You looked away.
Maybe she did love cherry blossoms.
Maybe it was a coincidence.
Still, something about hearing him say it made your chest feel strangely tight.
“Then she’ll see the card,” he continued, completely oblivious. “She’ll realize her secret admirer is thinking about her, and—boom!”
He pointed dramatically into the air.
“Romance.”
You huffed out a small laugh, despite yourself. “Shin, you’re such a romantic.”
His grin widened.
“Yeah, what can I say?” he said, proud of himself.
You shook your head.
Idiot.
As Shin continued to ramble on about how he was going to execute his flower delivery plan, your attention drifted.
First your poems.
Now your flowers.
The thought slipped into your head before you could stop it.
Why did that bother you so much? Especially when you’d agreed to help him in the first place.
Nobody was forcing you.
And yet, the longer he talked, the more uncomfortable you felt.
“Hey.”
You blinked.
Shin had gone quiet. He was staring at you now.
He tilted his head down to your level. “You okay?”
“Huh?”
“You look like you saw a ghost.”
You quickly shook your head. “Oh yeah. I’m fine.”
“You sure?”
“Positive.”
He eyed you suspiciously before eventually shrugging.
“Anyway,” he said, launching right back into his plan. “I know a guy who can probably get me a discount on the flowers.”
You smiled. Of course he did.
“And I’m gonna need your help,” he added.
You rolled your eyes. “What am I helping with this time?”
He fixed you with a hopeful look.
“What rhymes with cherry blossoms?”
***
Today was the day to execute mission: Romance the cutie at the checkout stand.
He had everything set up.
The flower delivery.
The poem.
Then, the reveal.
It was perfect! Nothing could go wrong.
Right now, Shin stood behind a row of shelves, watching his crush check out a few customers. He checked his phone for the time.
9:49AM
He had scheduled the delivery for ten, so he knew the guy would be showing up any minute now.
His crush finished helping the customers and then turned to start zoning her aisle, straightening a stack of candy bars. He was glad that he had chosen early morning for the delivery. Fewer customers would give him the chance to execute his reveal plan, smoothly without distractions.
Buzz…Buzz…
Shin pulled out his vibrating phone from his pocket to see a message from the delivery guy that he had arrived. He was just about to text the delivery guy to enter when he glanced up only to see his crush’s manager walk up beside her, clipboard in hand as he started talking to her about something.
Shin’s shoulders sunk.
He quickly dialed the number and the delivery guy picked up.
“Hey, can you hold off on the delivery for just a second?” he asked. “I’ll tell you when to go in.”
“Okay, man. Just let me know when.”
His dark, glassy eyes lifted back to the front counter when he heard her manager walk away. She was alone again.
Shin perked up.
“Okay, now,” he said, eager.
“Alright-”
“Wait!”
“What?!”
Shin watched as his crush suddenly left the counter and disappeared into the backroom.
He sighed.
“She left,” he explained, deflated again. “Can you hold off just a little longer?”
“Alright man. But I only have my parking space for a few minutes. If it takes too long, I’m gonna have to...”
Ding Dong.
Shin’s attention was pulled away when he heard the ring of the entrance door as someone entered, but he vaguely caught the delivery guy going on about needing to put more change in the parking meter. He watched as a couple of customers came in and he felt his shoulders sink even further.
“Just a few more minutes...”
But “just a few more minutes” turned into much longer as more customers arrived at the convenience store.
A businessman in a wrinkled suit walked up to the register with bottled coffee and a newspaper, then he left. Afterwards, an elderly woman shuffled up to the register.
She smiled warmly at his crush. “Hello young lady. Would you happen to know where the batteries are?”
Shin closed his eyes.
“Just a few more minutes…”
The delivery guy let out an audible groan through the phone.
“Buddy…”
“I know. Just a few more minutes. I promise.”
“I’ve got more deliveries, man.”
“I know.”
Finally, the old woman left. Shin practically bounced where he stood.
“Okay, now!”
The delivery guy took one step…then the front door suddenly swung open again.
This time, four middle-school boys burst inside arguing over which chips to buy.
Shin stared blankly.
“…”
One kid couldn’t decide between barbecue and sour cream. Another wanted slushies. Then one of them knocked over a gum display.
Shin slowly lowered his head until it rested against the shelf.
“This can’t be happening,” he murmured, exasperated.
“You still want to wait?” came the delivery guy’s voice through the speaker of his phone.
“…”
“Buddy?”
“…yeah…” Shin finally said, after a long pause. “Wait.”
Nearly ten minutes later, the boys finally wandered out of the store, their goodies and slushies filling their hands.
A moment later, another cashier came up to the register to grab a snack.
“Hey,” the coworker greeted his crush, but their eyes narrowed as they studied her. “You okay? You look annoyed.”
She sighed as she moved around the register to pick up the gum display the middle-school aged boys had knocked over earlier. “Just some annoying customers.”
The coworker made a face. “Oh, was it those thug guys again? They scare me.”
She shook her head. “Not this time. Just some annoying kids.”
She stood the gum display back up and placed the gum product back when her coworker piped up again.
“By the way, manager said that if those thugs do come back to just call him and he’ll deal with it.”
Shin’s crush nodded. “Yeah, okay. Better he deal with it than me.”
The coworker nodded before finally leaving the counter.
Shin smiled. She was alone again!
No manager.
No customers.
No distractions.
“Okay now!” he exclaimed over the phone.
He waited anxiously for the delivery guy to enter, his eyes darting back-and-forth between the entrance door and the front register, but when the door remained vacant, he frowned.
“Now!” he repeated into the phone, but there was still no response.
He pulled the phone away from his ear to make sure the call hadn’t dropped.
“…Hello?” he spoke again.
Silence.
His eyes lifted to the register again and he could’ve screamed in frustration. He watched as his crush left the front register and disappeared into the backroom again!
Shin groaned as he stepped out from behind the shelves and made his way to the front of the store. Out the front windows of the convenience store, he could see the delivery guy across the street, balancing the large bouquet in one hand and feeding coins into the parking meter with the other.
Shin pinched the bridge of his nose.
Of course.
Walking up to the entrance, he waved his hands in the air, exaggeratedly, trying to get the guy’s attention, but it wasn’t until the delivery guy was finally on his way back that he recognized Shin. Immediately, he picked up the pace and made his way back across the street with the large bouquet of cherry blossoms.
Shin grinned, releasing a sigh of relief.
Finally!
He spun around to make his way back to his favorite aisle to hide behind when…he stopped short.
“…”
His jaw fell open as he now stared at his crush, staring back at him with a dumbfounded expression.
“…Shin?” she said, her eyes darting between him then towards something behind him.
Everything inside him stopped.
His heart.
His pulse.
His breathing.
Shin gulped.
That’s when the entrance door swung open.
Ding Dong.
“Yo, you Shinichiro? I’ve got the cherry blossoms for the cutie at the checkout stand,” came the delivery guy’s voice from behind Shin.
His crush’s perfectly arched eyebrows lifted in shock as her eyes widened, while Shin’s eyes pressed closed.
For one brief second, Shin considered pretending he didn’t know how to speak Japanese.
Instead, he sighed.
“Yeah…” he said, his voice flat as he finally revealed himself, albeit not quite how he expected to. “That’s me.”
He then slowly opened his eyes to look at his crush with a slightly pained expression. “This…was supposed to go a lot smoother.”
***
Shin stood there, the bouquet now in his hands, looking like he wanted the floor to swallow him whole.
She stared at the cherry blossoms, then at him.
Then back at the flowers.
“These…are for me?” she asked.
Shin swallowed. “Yeah.”
The delivery guy, sensing the tension a little too late, slowly backed toward the door. “So…I’m gonna go.”
The bell chimed behind him as he exited.
Neither of them moved.
Shin forced himself to hold the bouquet out properly. “I, uh… I wanted to give them to you as a surprise. Just…not like that.”
Her fingers hovered near the flowers, but she didn’t take them right away.
“They’re beautiful,” she said softly.
Hope sparked in his chest.
Then her brows drew together, just a little.
“But… why cherry blossoms?”
Shin blinked. “Because they’re your favorite.”
Her expression shifted as she looked at him in confusion.
“My favorite?”
“Yeah,” he said, though his voice had already started to lose confidence. “I heard you talking about them on the phone once, so I thought…”
She stared at him for a moment, and something in her face softened with understanding.
“Oh,” she said quietly. “Shin… cherry blossoms aren’t my favorite.”
His smile fell a little. “They’re not?”
She shook her head. “They’re my friend’s favorite. I was talking about her that day.”
The words landed harder than he expected.
Shin looked down at the bouquet in his hands, suddenly feeling very aware of how big it was. How pink. How dramatic.
How wrong.
“Oh,” he said.
She gave him a small, apologetic smile. “I’m sorry.”
“No, don’t be,” he said quickly. “That’s—That’s my bad. I just thought…”
He trailed off, because he didn’t actually know what he had thought.
She glanced at the flowers again, then at him.
“And the poems,” she said carefully. “Those were from you too, right?”
His throat tightened.
“Yeah,” he admitted. “They were.”
She nodded slowly, as if she had already guessed.
“They were sweet,” she said. “Some of them were really beautiful.”
Shin’s face warmed, but this time the compliment didn’t feel as good as it should have.
“Thanks,” he said quietly.
“I mean that,” she added. “It was thoughtful. And the flowers are thoughtful too. I can tell you put a lot of effort into all of this.”
He looked up at her then, searching her face.
“But?” he asked.
She paused.
The gentleness in her expression made it worse.
“But I don’t think I can accept,” she said.
Shin went still.
She hurried to explain, clearly not wanting to hurt him more than she had to.
“It’s not because I think you’re a bad guy or anything. You’re nice. Really. And this is… probably one of the sweetest things anyone’s tried to do for me.”
He tried to smile. It didn’t quite work.
“But I don’t think you know me very well,” she said.
The store seemed to go quiet around them.
“You heard me mention flowers once and thought they were my favorite,” she continued gently. “And the poems were beautiful, but… I don’t know. Sometimes they felt like they were written for someone you imagined, not really for me.”
Shin’s fingers tightened around the bouquet.
He didn’t have an answer.
Because she was right.
She looked down, then back at him.
“I’m not mad,” she said. “And I’m not trying to embarrass you. I just think… if someone likes me, I’d want them to like me. Not just the version of me they made up in their head.”
Shin stared at her.
Then, slowly, his shoulders lowered.
“Yeah,” he said, barely above a whisper. “Yeah, that’s fair.”
Her expression softened even more.
“I’m sorry.”
He shook his head. “No. You don’t have to be.”
It was silent for a moment.
Then he looked down at the cherry blossoms and gave a small, humorless laugh.
“I really messed this up, huh?”
She smiled faintly. “A little.”
That got the tiniest laugh out of him, even if it hurt.
“Thanks for being honest,” he said.
“Thanks for being brave enough to tell me,” she replied.
For a second, he looked like he might say something else.
Then he only nodded.
“Right,” he said. “I’ll, uh… stop bothering you at work now.”
“You weren’t bothering me,” she said gently. “But maybe no more anonymous poems?”
His ears went red.
“Yeah,” he said. “Definitely no more anonymous poems.”
***
Today, the walk to the ramen shop had to be one of the longest walks of his life. His shoes practically dragged against the pavement as he trudged along.
His ex-crush’s voice kept replaying in his head.
I just think…if someone likes me, I’d want them to like me.
He sighed heavily as he finally came up to the entrance of the shop, then he shook his head and entered.
When the bell above the door jingled as he walked in, he heard familiar laughter coming from the side of the restaurant him and his friends usually sit at and sure enough, they were all there.
“Hey Shin,” Wakasa called, coolly waving him over.
Shin moved across the restaurant, walking up to their table. The guys all gave him expressions varying between amused, hopeful, and curious.
“Well?” Waka asked.
“Did she say yes?” Benkei followed.
“Yeah, you finally reveal yourself, Romeo?” teased Akashi.
Silence.
Shin kept his eyes downcast on the table.
No one said anything as the silence stretched out painfully long.
After a few more moments, Waka finally cleared his throat.
“Damn. That bad, huh?”
Shin still didn’t say anything.
Then, Benkei stood to clap a supportive hand to Shin on the back. “Hey, you’ll live, man.”
“Probably,” Akashi muttered, sarcastically.
Shin grimaced. “Thanks…”
“Hey, what’s going on?”
Shin stiffened upon hearing the sound of your voice from behind.
“Hey, Ghostwriter!”
You rolled your eyes at Waka’s nickname for you ever since he and the guys found out you wrote Shin’s poems.
“Would you stop calling me that?”
He just laughed as you slid into a chair, taking your place again after having come back from the restroom.
Shin pulled up a chair to sit at the head of the table. Then, after a moment of silence, Waka couldn’t help himself, so he asked.
“So…?”
Shin sighed.
“I got rejected…” he paused for a moment, then added, “…again.”
Benkei winced. “Ouch.”
“What happened?” Akashi asked.
Shin shrugged. “I don’t know her.”
He briefly explained to his friends what happened with the failed delivery attempt and the rejection from his ex-crush afterwards.
The table remained silent as his words settled in. Then finally…
“Well yeah,” Benkei said, scratching his cheek. “I mean, not to pile on, but…you barely knew the girl.”
Shin looked up at him with a slight frown, but Benkei just shrugged.
“You talked to her like what…twice?” he reasoned.
Waka laughed as he added on. “And you wrote her poems before you even learned her favorite flower, dude.”
“That is kind of backwards, man,” Akashi concluded.
Waka continued to laugh, while Akashi snorted and Benkei just shook his head.
You, on the other hand, pressed your lips together, as you gave him a sympathetic look.
Shin blinked as his friends’ words dawned on him.
“Yeah…I guess so.”
Eventually, the table began to settle into its usual rhythm, but Shin stayed mostly silent, causing you to take notice as you side-glanced him, occasionally. Then Waka finally stood while joking with the others.
“Anyways, we’re gonna see if we can get the waitress at the bar to give us another round of beer on a discount.”
“Don’t embarrass me,” you lectured them all. “The only reason we even get discounts on the ramen here is because she’s my friend.”
Akashi glared at Waka. “Well, we wouldn’t have to bribe her if you’d just let me do the talking.”
Benkei agreed. “Yeah, you’ll probably just scare her with that creepy ass smile of yours, Waka.”
“Shut up!” he griped, flipping them off as he marched towards the bar with them following right behind.
You watched as all three left the table to go over to the bar, leaving you and Shin alone now.
The table became quiet once again.
Then finally, Shin spoke.
“I think she was right.”
You looked at him.
“I didn’t know anything about her,” he continued.
You stayed silent as you listened to him.
“I just…” he suddenly laughed weakly. “…liked the idea of her.”
You still didn’t say anything as he continued to ramble on.
“I still don’t even know what her favorite flower is.”
You let his words hang in the air for a moment before finally saying what’s been on your mind all afternoon.
“You know…” you began carefully. “I don’t think she rejected you because of the flowers, Shin.”
He looked up at you, taken aback.
“And I think…” you continued, deep in thought. “I think you…deserve someone who knows you, too.”
Shin frowned. “What?”
You looked up at him.
“I said you deserve someone who knows you,” you repeated, thoughtfully. “You said she told you that you don’t really know her, but you deserve that, too. Like…someone who knows that you’re like a big brother to everyone and that’s why so many people look up to you.”
Shin sat still, staring at you in shock but you just continued.
“Or, someone who knows you’d never stand by while someone else gets hurt.”
Shin blinked, stunned.
“Someone who knows you’re the type to pretend you’re okay even when you’re hurting,” you continued on before smiling, softly. “Someone who knows you laugh whenever you’re embarrassed.”
Shin’s breathing deepened as he stared at you, intently, hanging on to your every word.
“Someone who knows…” you paused as you now felt his dark eyes boring into you.
That’s when you realized how much you had rambled off.
“Oh…” you stared back at him.
After a long moment, Shin gulped.
“How…”
“What?”
“How did you know all that?”
You froze. You blinked. “Well…I…”
“HEY!”
Both your heads snapped at the sound of a sudden shriek from across the restaurant.
“Waka!” the sound of Benkei’s deep voice followed. “You’re making a mess!”
You noticed your friend at the bar now looking to you for help.
“Your friends are being idiots!” she complained.
You sighed and got up.
“I’ll be right back,” you told Shin before marching over to the bar.
Shin stared after you as you went off to rescue your waitress friend from Waka and the others.
“Now what did I tell you idiots?!”
Waka immediately protested his innocence. Akashi laughed while Benkei looked deeply tired of them both.
Normally, Shin would’ve joined in, but tonight, he barely heard them.
He couldn’t help the way everything you’d just said was now replaying in his head.
someone who knows you’re like a big brother to everyone…
someone who knows you’d never stand by while someone gets hurt…
someone who knows you pretend you’re okay even when you’re hurting…
someone who knows you laugh whenever you’re embarrassed…
The words replayed in his head one after another.
How did you know all that?
You had listed them so naturally. Not like observations, but like, they’d simply become part of what you knew about him.
Shin swallowed.
Without meaning to, his mind drifted back several weeks.
Of you two hanging in the shop.
Spending late nights together in your room.
You helping him whenever he got another idea for a poem.
“I knew it right then and there,” he’d declared proudly when you two were hanging in the ramen shop alone. “I need you.”
Shin blinked as his words from a few weeks ago now popped up in his head.
At the time, he’d meant he needed a talented writer to save him from another embarrassing poem. Nothing more.
But now he remembered the way your eyes had widened. The way you had stared at him a second too long before quickly making a joke about writing his wedding vows someday. He’d laughed it off. He’d been too excited about the convenience store girl to think about it any further.
He bit his lip as another memory resurfaced.
Like, your reaction to when he came up with the reveal plan.
The cherry blossoms.
He’d been rambling about coming up with a reveal plan while pacing around your room like a madman. Then he’d noticed all the Sakura decorations and excitedly announced that his crush must have loved cherry blossoms, too.
You’d gone quiet.
Not annoyed. Not confused. Just…quiet.
He had sensed something was off.
He had asked if you were okay.
But you had insisted that you were fine.
Back then he’d believed you, but now he wondered why he’d accepted that answer so easily.
And then there were the poems themselves.
That thought stopped him cold.
You’d translated every single one.
No matter how badly phrased.
No matter how awkward.
No matter how unrefined.
Your face is nice.
Like, really really nice.
He almost laughed.
Dear God…those were awful.
And yet…
You never laughed at him.
Not really.
Maybe you’d tease him, roll your eyes, or call him hopeless, but then you’d pick up your pen, and somehow, you always knew. Not just what he was trying to say, but what he meant.
The words came so easily to you as if…as if they’d been there all along. As if you’d already felt them.
Shin’s breathing slowed.
“No…” he whispered to himself as he began to realize.
They weren’t just better poems.
They weren’t just prettier words.
They sounded…real.
He thought back to one in particular.
I catch myself thinking about you in the middle of ordinary moments…
He frowned.
He knew he never would’ve thought to say that.
Then another popped in his head.
When you smile, everything feels a little lighter…
And another.
I dream about being near you, even if it’s in silence...
His heart skipped.
Those weren’t his words. At least, not really because…they came from you.
Not because you were better at writing.
But because you already understood the feeling.
“You weren’t writing what I wanted to say…”
The realization hit him so suddenly that it nearly stole the air from his lungs.
“You were writing what you would’ve wanted someone to say to you.”
He stared toward the bar where you were scolding Waka while Akashi and Benkei sniggered.
All this time…
He’d thought you were helping him chase someone else, when all along…
You’d been quietly pouring pieces of your own heart onto every page.
***
You first noticed it when you all left the ramen shop that evening.
Shin’s strange behavior.
Normally, he would’ve waved over his shoulder with a lazy, “See ya,” or something along those lines. But this time, he lingered…
You watched as his eyes focused on his shuffling feet, obviously hesitating, which you found odd.
“Shin?” you called, encouraging him to say whatever was on his mind, but he just looked up at you and smiled, softly.
“Uh…just…” he swallowed. “Get home safe, okay?”
Your brows furrowed slightly as your face twisted in a look of both confusion and amusement.
“But, I always do.”
“Yeah,” he said, before running a hand through his dark messy hair. “I know.”
That wasn’t the only time he’d acted curiously, though.
A few days later when you were at his bike shop, watching him work, you swore you felt something when he’d asked you to hand him the wrench.
He’d been working hard all afternoon, hunched over a bike, the sleeves of his mechanic uniform pushed up, and pale skin smudged with grease, but because his toolbox was closest to where you sat, he’d asked you to hand it over.
Without a thought, you had reached for the toolbox and pulled out the wrench, then stood to hand it to him.
He’d reached out to retrieve it from you.
That’s when your hands brushed one another’s…
Typically, this would be no big deal, but this time, he paused a second longer than usual.
Long enough to notice.
Long enough to look you in the eyes.
“Thanks,” he’d said warmly, like you had given him something much more intimate than a simple tool.
Then, he’d immediately went back to tightening a bolt, leaving you standing there, completely stumped.
Or there was the way he seemed to be in tuned with you and your body in a way that he wasn’t before.
For example, one day while you two were hanging out, walking through the crowded streets of the city, you had almost bumped into someone when you weren’t paying any attention. You were just a step ahead of Shin when you slightly turned around to tell him something while still walking forward. You didn’t even realize you were about to collide with someone. That’s when you felt his hand caress the small of your back, only to guide you closer to him, just before you could crash into the other person.
It was almost like he had done so, instinctively.
The gesture had thrown you off so much that you just blinked in surprise as you watched the other person continue walking by, dusting past your shoulders.
Then, Shin’s hand dropped from your back and he kept walking as if he hadn’t done anything at all, but your head stayed stuck in that moment because, since when did he do that?
But what you found most strange were his cryptic phrases. In fact, it was becoming a pattern.
Shin would say something oddly specific.
You would ask what he meant.
He’d smile to himself…then refuse to elaborate.
It was like he was silently in on some joke that you weren’t privy to.
Like, the time you two were casually walking together one afternoon while hanging out. You’d said something totally normal. Nothing worth batting an eyelash at, and yet, he’d smiled to himself leaving you curious.
“What?” you had asked when you caught the grin on his face.
“Hm?” he’d asked.
“Why are you smiling? Did I say something funny?”
He’d shaken his head. “It's nothing.”
You’d stared at him, not knowing how to respond.
At first, he didn’t either. Then finally…
“You’re just really good with words,” he’d answered, making you freeze.
“What?” you’d said, stunned.
But he’d just kept walking, as he continued. “I never realized that before.”
In addition, his new favorite phrase seemed to have become, “you always know what I’m trying to say,” whenever you clarified something he said.
But clearly, this wasn’t true because every time he spoke, he confused you even more!
Tonight was no different.
It was Saturday night, and you two were at the convenience store, getting snacks you planned to smuggle into the movie that you, Shin, and the guys were all going to see later.
You both were in the chip’s aisle, looking over the dozens of colorful options.
“Which one do you want?” you asked, picking up a bag.
Shin shrugged. “I trust your judgement.”
This made you laugh. “Since when?”
But he just smiled and said, “Guess I should’ve trusted it sooner.”
You tilted your head to the side, puzzled. “Okay…?”
Regardless, you chose one of each kind to cover all the bases.
Then you guys got to the refrigerated drinks.
You were trying to decide between two different beverages.
Shin finally pulled both out and told you to pick your absolute favorite, holding them up in front of him for you to choose.
You chuckled. “Why my absolute favorite?”
“Because,” he said looking at you with his signature half-smile. “This time I want to know what your favorite actually is.”
You stared at him for a long moment.
This is what you meant by cryptic phrasing. Lately, every conversation with Shin felt like you had missed the first half of it.
You blinked at him. “What?”
But again, he just smiled at you and shook his head.
“Nothing.”
He then put both drinks in the little handheld basket and kept going as normal.
“Shin, wait-” you said, turning to stop him so you could question him further. All these cryptic responses were driving you absolutely insane.
But before you could say anything further, you heard the chime signaling someone had just entered the automatic doors to the store.
Ding Dong.
Afterwards, a loud howl echoed around the store, followed by the sound of obnoxious laughter like that of hyenas.
You immediately felt yourself go on-guard as you looked up to see a group of rough-looking guys enter the store, looking more like they were out for blood rather than the ordinary snacks the convenience store had to offer.
As you watched from where you stood, one of the men sauntered over to the front counter, then leaned so far over the register that the cashier instinctively backed away, forcing a tight, uncomfortable smile. Another slammed into a display of gum with his elbow, sending packs scattering across the floor, while two others tore open snacks they’d grabbed from the shelves as if the store belonged to them.
The cashier protested, but her voice was swallowed almost immediately by a chorus of jeers and laughter. Whatever she said only seemed to amuse them more.
Immediately, you looked at Shinichiro.
He was no longer smiling.
One second, he was standing beside you with a basket full of snacks and that stupid half-smile still tugging at his mouth. The next, his expression smoothed out completely.
His shoulders squared.
His eyes sharpened.
His jaw set tight.
Something in him shifted.
You gulped as you watched him, his dark bangs falling into his eyes, focused at the front of the store, but for once, they didn’t make him look boyish. They made him look unreadable.
And suddenly, you remembered.
Shinichiro Sano was not just the idiot who wrote terrible poems and asked what rhymed with cherry blossoms.
He was the leader of the Black Dragons.
“Stay here,” he commanded.
You blinked at the sound of his voice, taken aback. It was still Shin’s voice, but lower now. Steadier. The kind that made people listen before they even realized they were obeying.
“Shin-” you said, about to protest but then he looked up at you as he set the basket down beside your feet.
“Off to the side. Please.”
Then he walked away before you could argue.
Shin didn’t immediately intervene.
He watched calmly. Patiently.
As if he was giving them every opportunity to make the smart choice.
But then one of the men leaned in again, close enough that the cashier took another step back.
That’s when his voice cut through the chaos like a knife.
“Hey!” he said, voice firm.
The laughter died down just enough for them to turn and look at him, one by one.
“That’s enough.”
One of the thug’s eyes dragged over him from head to toe. “What?”
Shin’s hands stayed loose at his sides. “She’s working. Leave her alone.”
The guy scoffed. “And who the fuck are you supposed to be?”
“Nobody,” Shin said evenly. “Just asking you to back off.”
That made another one laugh. “Asking?”
Shin sighed through his nose. “Yeah. Asking.”
You felt your stomach tighten.
That was somehow worse than if he had raised his voice.
“Come on,” Shin continued, still calm. “You guys can walk out right now, and nobody has to make this a thing.”
“Or what?”
Shin’s eyes narrowed slightly. “Or I stop asking.”
The air went still.
You took one step back, then another. Shin was strong. You knew that. Everyone knew that. But there were too many of them, and the store suddenly felt too small.
Your eyes darted toward the entrance doors.
Wakasa. Benkei. Akashi.
They were only at the next shop over.
You needed to get them.
You quickly made way for the exit.
Maybe it was the pale skin, and the lanky build that made them mistake Shin for being soft, because behind you, one of the thugs snapped, “You got a mouth on you, pretty boy.”
That was the last thing you had heard before you scurried out of the store to run next door.
*
Shin didn’t move as he glared at the thugs. “Last warning.”
They didn’t listen.
The first punch came fast.
Shin stepped aside before it landed, the man’s fist cutting through empty air. The thug stumbled forward, thrown off balance by his own momentum.
Shin didn’t hit him.
He didn’t even raise his fists.
He only looked at him, almost disappointed.
“Don’t do that.”
Another one rushed him from behind.
“Shin!”
The warning came from his ex-crush at the counter, but Shin was already moving.
His hand caught the man’s wrist. His shoulder dipped. Then, in one clean motion, the thug went over him and hit the tile with a heavy thud that made the shelves rattle.
Shin released him immediately and stepped back.
He hadn’t thrown a punch.
He hadn’t needed to.
The thug on the floor groaned, blinking up at him in stunned confusion.
Shin looked down at him.
“Stay down.”
For the first time since they had walked in, the thugs weren’t laughing anymore as two of the guys kneeled to the floor to check on their friend, clutching his wrist while groaning in pain.
The leader of the pack just stared back-and-forth between Shin and his friend on the ground in bewilderment.
“Last chance,” Shin said, voice low. “Take your friend and go.”
The guy didn’t move but looked like he was torn between helping his friend or attempting another attack on Shin, but when the automatic doors to the store opened again, his eyes widened in fear.
“Hey Shin,” the sound of Waka’s voice drawled from the doorway behind Shinichiro, causing him to turn around. Waka cracked his knuckles. “You startin’ without us?”
“What’s going on?” Benkei added as he stepped inside. “Is everyone okay?”
“Man, you guys picked the wrong convenience store,” Akashi said with a smirk.
“Wait…” one of the thugs muttered, his face draining of color. “That’s Wakasa Imaushi.”
Another stiffened. “And Benkei?”
His gaze then snapped back to Shin. “No way…”
Shin only looked at him, silent.
“That’s Sano Shinichiro.”
Instantly, the leader-guy scrambled to get his friend off the floor, the other two trailing right behind.
“But my wrist!” cried the thug, dramatically clutching his injured wrist to his chest. “I think he broke my wrist!”
But the leader was having none of it as he practically dragged his friend out the store with him.
“We’ll deal with it later! Let’s go!”
The group literally pushed their way out of the store as they all scurried to get out as fast as possible, clearly terrified of what would happen if they went up against The Black Dragons.
But Shin didn’t watch the thugs run out. He immediately went over to the counter.
“You okay?” he asked the cashier who he used to be absolutely crazy about. She was staring between him and the door where the thugs had fled just at the mention of his name.
“Yeah…I’m okay,” she nodded, staring at him in awe.
Shin smiled when he heard Waka pipe up again.
“So Shin, what’s up? We chasin’ after ‘em or what?”
He cracked his knuckles again like he was more than ready to give those guys absolute hell. All Shin had to do was give his members the “okay” and he knew those thugs would end up with way more problems than just a hurt wrist, but he just shook his head.
“No. Let them go.”
Waka snapped his tongue, clearly disappointed. “Really?”
Shin shrugged as he gestured to the cashier. “She’s alright now.”
His eyes then finally landed on you as you now stood near the entrance.
“I thought I told you to wait.”
You responded simply by putting your hands up and shrugging. You did what you had to do. Even though you knew he was strong, you weren’t just going to stand around while Shin took on four thugs by himself.
But Shin’s attention was taken away when a soft voice called him again.
“Hey Shin, can I talk to you for a minute?” the cashier asked as she came around the counter to walk up to him.
Shin blinked, then nodded. “Yeah. Sure.”
Sensing that they needed a moment alone, the guys drifted a few steps away, still muttering amongst themselves, though Wakasa kept looking back like he was hoping Shin would change his mind and let them chase after the thugs after all.
You stayed near the entrance, arms loosely folded, watching as the cashier stopped in front of Shin.
For a moment, she didn’t say anything. She only looked at him like she was seeing him properly for the first time.
Not the awkward guy who had left poems at her register. Not the boy who had stumbled through a failed flower delivery with cherry blossoms meant for someone else’s favorite things.
But the man who had quietly stepped between her and four strangers without asking for anything in return.
The person those men had run from the second they realized who he was.
Her fingers twisted nervously in front of her. “I didn’t know.”
Shin tilted his head slightly. “Didn’t know what?”
“That you were…” Her eyes flickered toward the door, then back to him. “You know. You.”
Shin gave a small, sheepish laugh as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, well. I don’t usually lead with that.”
She smiled faintly, but there was something warmer in it now. Something almost regretful.
“I guess I didn’t know you very well either,” she admitted softly.
The words made Shin pause.
A few weeks ago, they probably would’ve made his heart jump right out of his chest. A few weeks ago, he would’ve taken that as an opening, as a sign, as proof that all those poems and flowers and ridiculous plans had finally worked.
But now, all he could think about was you standing near the door with your hands still half-raised like you’d been ready to defend your choice to run for help.
You, who knew exactly when he was joking and when he wasn’t.
You, who had known he would never stand by when someone was getting hurt.
You, who had run anyway because knowing that about him didn’t stop you from worrying.
The cashier took a breath. “Thank you for stepping in. Really. You didn’t have to do that for me.”
Shin shook his head. “Anyone would’ve.”
“No,” she said, looking at him with quiet certainty. “They wouldn’t.”
He didn’t know what to say to that.
She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, suddenly shy. “I know this is probably terrible timing, but…if you’re not busy later, maybe we could get coffee? Or something?”
Shin stared at her.
Actually stared.
So did Wakasa.
Akashi’s brows shot up so high they nearly disappeared into his hairline, while Benkei made a low sound that suspiciously resembled a cough trying to hide a laugh.
Because there it was.
The thing Shinichiro Sano had been dreaming about for weeks.
The girl at the convenience store was asking him out.
And somehow, all he felt was surprised.
Not thrilled.
Not dizzy.
Not even nervous in the way he used to get around her.
Just surprised.
Like someone had handed him a prize after he’d already walked away from the game.
A few weeks ago, he would’ve said yes before she even finished asking.
A few weeks ago, he would’ve stumbled over himself, grinned like an idiot, and probably bragged to everyone that poetry had finally changed his life.
But he wasn’t that Shin anymore.
Or maybe he was.
Maybe he had simply figured out what he should’ve been looking at all along.
His gaze softened.
“I’m sorry,” he said gently.
The cashier blinked. “Oh.”
“It’s not because I’m mad or anything,” he said quickly. “And it’s not because I don’t appreciate it. I do. Really.”
He glanced down, laughing once under his breath.
“Honestly, if you asked me that a little while ago, I probably would’ve passed out.”
That made her smile a little, even as disappointment flickered across her face.
“But?” she asked.
Shin looked at her honestly.
“But I think I finally know who I actually like.”
The cashier’s lips parted slightly, realization dawning.
Her gaze drifted past him.
Shin followed it automatically.
And froze.
You weren’t by the entrance anymore.
The basket of snacks still sat abandoned beside the aisle, but you were gone.
His heart dropped.
“Where’d she go?” he asked, already turning.
Wakasa pointed toward the door with his thumb. “She stepped out a second ago.”
Shin didn’t wait for anything else.
“Shin?” the cashier called softly.
He looked back at her, apologetic.
She smiled, a little sad but understanding. “Go.”
So he did.
The bell above the door chimed sharply as Shin rushed out onto the sidewalk.
The evening air hit him first, cool against his heated face. Then the noise of the street rushed in around him—cars passing, people talking, the distant hum of the city.
For one terrifying second, he didn’t see you.
Then his eyes caught sight of you half a block away, walking fast with your shoulders hunched and your hands shoved deep into the pockets of your jacket.
“Hey!” he called.
You didn’t stop.
“Hey, wait!”
This time, you slowed, but only because his long legs were already catching up.
Shin reached you just as you turned halfway around, confusion and something more guarded flickering across your face.
“What are you doing?” you asked, breathless though you hadn’t been running. “Shouldn’t you be back there?”
Shin slowed in front of you, chest rising and falling from the short sprint.
“Back where?”
You gave him a look like the answer was obvious. “With…her.”
Something tightened in his chest.
You looked away first, pretending to focus on the passing cars. “She asked you out, didn’t she? That’s what you wanted.”
Shin stared at you.
Then, slowly, he smiled.
Not his usual crooked grin. Not the embarrassed laugh he used whenever he got caught doing something stupid.
This smile was quieter.
Surer.
Like he had finally found the right words without needing anyone else to translate them for him.
“I did want that,” he said.
You swallowed, your expression tightening.
“A few weeks ago,” he added.
Your eyes flicked back to him.
Shin took one careful step closer.
“But then some annoying girl kept helping me write poems,” he said, voice softening, “and somehow, she made me realize I didn’t know the person I was chasing at all.”
Your lips parted.
“And then,” he continued, “she said I deserved someone who knew me.”
You froze as the street seemed to quiet around you.
For once, you didn’t have anything clever to say.
You only stared at him, heart pounding so hard you were sure he could hear it over the passing cars.
“Shin…” you said, but his name came out smaller than you meant it to.
His smile softened at the sound.
“You always knew what I was trying to say,” he murmured. “Even when I didn’t.”
You swallowed. “That doesn’t mean—”
“It means everything,” he cut in gently.
That shut you up.
Shin stepped closer again, close enough now that you had to tilt your head back to look at him. The streetlights caught in his dark eyes, turning them warm at the edges, but his gaze never wavered from yours.
Your breath caught.
You tried to look away, but Shin reached up, careful and slow, giving you every chance to pull back. His fingers brushed beneath your chin, tilting your face back toward his.
You didn’t pull away.
His thumb skimmed lightly along your jaw, and for one unbelievable second, Shinichiro Sano looked almost impossibly sure of himself.
“So let me say this one right,” he whispered.
Your heart stopped.
Shin smiled.
“I don’t want coffee with her,” he said softly. “I want everything ordinary with you.”
Then he leaned in.
The kiss was soft at first, almost questioning, like he was still waiting for you to decide whether this was real. But the second your fingers curled into the front of his jacket, Shin’s breath hitched.
Then he kissed you like he finally understood what all those poems had been trying to say.
His arm slid around your waist, steady and warm, drawing you closer as your feet nearly lifted off the pavement. The kiss was all instinct and feeling as he held you like he couldn’t believe you were there and kissing him back.
Finally, after weeks of terrible poems, borrowed words, failed plans, and twenty-one rejections, Shinichiro Sano was smooth.
Devastatingly smooth.
For about five seconds.
“FINALLY!”
You and Shin broke apart at the sudden shout.
Half a block behind you, Wakasa stood outside the convenience store with both hands thrown into the air like he had just witnessed a miracle.
Benkei stood beside him, arms crossed, looking far too proud for someone who had absolutely nothing to do with the moment.
Akashi, meanwhile, had his hand over his mouth, clearly failing to hide his laughter.
Shin’s face went red instantly.
“Are you kidding me?” he snapped.
Wakasa ignored him completely. “Twenty-one rejections, and the man lives!”
“Technically,” Benkei said, nodding solemnly, “this one didn’t reject him.”
“Historic,” Akashi added. “We should mark the date.”
You buried your face against Shin’s chest, partly to hide your burning cheeks and partly because you were laughing too hard to stand up straight.
Shin groaned, tipping his head back toward the sky. “I hate you guys.”
“No, you don’t,” you said softly, knowing him well enough to know how much he loved his friends.
He looked back down at you.
The embarrassment was still there, bright across his cheeks, but his expression softened the second his eyes met yours.
“No,” he admitted, quieter now. “I don’t.”
His hand found yours between you, fingers lacing through yours like it was the easiest thing in the world.
Wakasa made a gagging sound from down the sidewalk.
“Ugh, now they’re holding hands. This is getting disgusting.”
Benkei sighed.
“Can we please get to the movie before they start kissing again?” Waka continued with an exaggerated roll of his eyes.
Shin immediately pulled you a little closer, mostly out of spite.
“Actually,” he called back, “I might.”
You smacked his chest lightly. “Shin!”
But he was smiling again, bright and boyish and completely unashamed now.
The kind of smile that made everything feel lighter.
And this time, when he looked at you, you didn’t have to translate a single thing.
Scene: Bonten men eating you out. 😼
Characters: Sanzu, Mikey, Ran, Rindou, Kakucho, Kokonoi, Takeomi. (Sorry, Mochi :<)
Tags: Fem!reader! Smut! Oral (F. receiving)! Fingering! Dirty talk!
Note: My first time posting smut 😢 hope its good. Also, English isn't my first language. My bad for any mistakes but hope you guys enjoy 🍽
divider crdts: @/diviniyae (red diamonds divider), @/cafekitsune (mdni divider), @/omi-resources (red line divider)
🌹 - Mikey
Mikey eats pussy like he’s trying to forget who he is. Silent, focused, and starving—like you’re the only thing grounding him in the moment. Silent, slow, and deliberate. He doesn’t say much—doesn’t need to. His eyes are heavy-lidded and unreadable as he works his tongue against you, calm and methodical like he’s trying to memorize the way you fall apart. He doesn’t rush. He doesn’t stop. He’ll pin your hips with an iron grip, unmoving, because he hates when you squirm away. There’s something intimate and almost reverent in the way he does it—like he doesn’t think he deserves you, but he’s going to worship you anyway. You’ll come more than once. He won’t say a word. He’ll just rest his head on your thigh afterward, quiet and exhausted like he just pulled himself back from the edge.
🌹 - Sanzu
There’s nothing soft about the way Sanzu eats pussy—he doesn’t aim to please. He aims to ruin. It’s raw, relentless, and loud. He spits, licks, sucks with tongue and teeth, and doesn't care how wrecked you are. If you cry, he’ll smirk. If you moan too loud, he’ll cover your mouth with his hand and keep going, not missing a beat. He moans into you like he’s high off the taste (he probably is), and it only spurs him to go harder. He’s got one hand between your thighs, two fingers buried knuckle-deep, curling just right as his mouth drags over your clit with messy, desperate greed. He talks during it, voice wrecked and slurred “That’s it. Come on, give it to me. Fuck, you taste so good...” And when you're shaking, too sensitive to breathe, he'll look up with a bloodshot grin and ask if you're done—because he isn’t.
🌹 - Rindou
Rindou doesn’t look like much of a giver—until you’re spread out and he’s buried between your thighs, whining softly into your cunt like he’s hooked on the taste. He’s a little rough, a little impatient, but so fucking eager. He loves being used. Will bury his face in you and rut his hips into the mattress just from how good you sound. He’s so sloppy—spit, tongue, fingers curled inside you, like he needs all of it at once. He uses his fingers a lot—fast, deep, curling hard while his mouth sucks your clit like it owes him something. His voice is always a little shaky, like he’s overwhelmed but addicted. He’s the type to mutter “one more” five times in a row until you’re completely overstimulated, legs trembling, begging him to stop—and that’s when he finally pulls back and kisses your thigh, satisfied and wrecked.
🌹 - Ran
Ran treats oral like foreplay and domination all at once. He knows what he’s doing—knows how slow to go, how soft to make it before dragging you straight off the edge. He’ll press a kiss to your inner thigh, hold eye contact, and say something low like, “You gonna behave for me?” And then he devours you. He makes it obscene—spreads you open with two long fingers, kisses your clit, licks slow and lazy while making eye contact, like he’s savoring a glass of wine. And just when you think he’s done tormenting you, he dives in, tongue fucking you deep while his fingers rub circles until your legs are shaking. You’ll be ruined and wrecked—and he’ll wipe his mouth with the back of his hand and say, “You taste better than I remembered.”
🌹 - Kokonoi
Kokonoi eats you out like he's trying to forget everything else. Not like it’s a performance, not like he's showing off—like it’s the one place he can breathe. He moves slow at first, tongue soft, deliberate, hands gripping your thighs like he needs to keep you close or he’ll spiral. He doesn't talk much during it, but his eyes say everything—half-lidded, dark, focused like you're the only thing in the room that feels real. When you moan, he groans against you like he can feel it. When your hips buck, he tightens his grip, exhales a curse, and buries himself deeper like he's starving. His rhythm is steady, thoughtful—but there's this edge, like he’s trying to lose himself in you. Like he needs to. He doesn’t stop when you come. Just slows, softens, mouth dragging against you with quiet reverence until your body goes limp under his touch. Then he rests his head against your thigh, breathing you in. “You’re everything,” he’ll whisper, barely audible—like it slipped out by accident. And maybe it did. But he doesn’t take it back.
🌹 - Kakucho
Kakucho is controlled. Precise. He worships you with his mouth like he’s praying—slow licks, perfect pressure, like he memorized what makes you unravel. He looks up at you the whole time, watching every reaction, and if your breath hitches even a little, he doubles down. He doesn’t do anything halfway, and that includes getting on his knees for you. He’s focused—tongue slow and consistent, fingers curled just right, eyes locked on you to read every twitch of your body. He won’t stop until you come undone completely, until you’re gasping and crying his name, and then he’ll kiss your thighs with reverence like you’re something holy. He eats like he loves. With quiet devotion and no mercy.
🌹 - Takeomi
Takeomi eats you out like he’s got nothing to prove and everything to enjoy. He’s slow. Deep. Methodical. A veteran at this. It’s slow, almost maddening. He’s going to taste every inch of you, feel every twitch and moan. One hand on your thigh, the other lazily teasing between your folds until he’s sure you’re soaked. Then his mouth takes over—tongue firm and deliberate, sucking and rolling against your clit with practiced ease. He doesn’t say much, but when he does, it’s low and rough and just shy of mocking “Look at you, so fucking needy. You were talkin’ big a minute ago.” And when you come for him, he hums like it’s the best thing he’s tasted in years. Then he wipes his mouth, lights a cigarette, and tells you you’re not going anywhere—he’s not done yet.
synopsis: in which they discover you had their child and kept it from them all these years later.
pairing: bonten x fem!reader [ mikey, ran, sanzu ]
warnings: mature content ahead. MDI. mature language, crude humor, angst (if you squint really hard), deadbeat!bonten (unintentionally), not proof-read so there may be errors lol and i think that’s it :))
notes: i just want the drama >:) may make more parts, and even extend said headcannons into longer fics in the future, but wanted to post something quick for mother’s day. hope you enjoy!
When you disappeared off the face of the earth, MIKEY had never been the same. One fight. One argument that spiraled out of control, and you were just gone...
He had people looking for you for about a couple years, the trail ran cold after a while and he had half a mind to think you were dead. Up until he got intel of your whereabouts one morning during a meeting.
That man got up and left immediately.
He wasn’t accompanied with any of his men, only because he didn’t want to draw any unwanted attention in the broad daylight. Sure, him wearing a black hood, ball cap, and mask in a park didn’t really help him look inconspicuous but it at least concealed his identity enough for him to blend in. Mikey sat on a bench for a good forty minutes, anxious, making anyone who passed him shiver from his intense aura alone; even birds walked around him. After almost an hour of waiting, he began to feel frustrated. Perhaps, the intel was false. Just as he went to stand, already conjuring up ways to have Sanzu execute the idiot who wasted his time, he heard it.
Your voice. Seizing him, like a siren’s call.
His eyes were alert, darting around until they landed on your figure, spotlighted by the sun, like an angel descending from the heavens. You looked good, healthy. That was good. An array of emotions fought for their turn in Mikey’s heart—Relief, distress, anger, nostalgia. He couldn’t just pick one, especially when it came to you. As he watched from his spot, doing his best to not seem suspicious, he clocked the people you were approaching with excitement, your peppy stride as you waved at, what he presumed, to be mother and daughter.
However, his entire world turned upside down when the little girl extended out her arms towards you, and said “Mama!”
“Hello, my darling.~” You cooed, taking her into your awaiting arms from the woman, embracing the toddler tightly. “Mama missed you so much.”
“Missed you, mama!” was the child’s reply, followed by her giggles.
A bucket of cold water would’ve been better than this. Watching you converse with who he now assumes to be the babysitter, Mikey felt faint. Vision blurring, head pounding, heart clenching. You…you…no. There’s no way. You wouldn’t have moved on…you couldn’t have, not like this, not from him. You loved him, didn’t you? You still love him, didn’t you?
How could you…how could you?
Before he knew it, he started to follow you around. From the park, to the store, all the way back to your apartment. He already phoned some of the executives to start working in on the babysitter, and anyone else in your new found circle for information. He wanted answers. He needed them.
By the time you began fixing dinner, with your daughter laid down for a nap, you receive a knock at your door. Who could that be at this hour?
RAN was chilling outside the rendezvous spot for something the boss and a few other execs were participating in, having a smoke, minding his business, up until he sees a little girl with pigtails wearing a school uniform approaching, standing before him and just…staring. She barely came up to his thighs, could've been no older than seven. She was practically staring into his soul with bright lavender eyes that scarily reminded him of Rin’s when he was that age.
He stared back, head tilted as he blew out the smoke from the corner of his mouth. The hell was a kid doing on this side of town?
Then, after an uncomfortable staring contest, the little girl points at his cigarette. “My ma says those things are bad for you.”
Ran raised a brow, “Does she now?”
“Mmhm! She says it makes people unhappy.”
He offered a thoughtful nod, an amused grin spreading across his face. “Mm. Do I look unhappy?”
The girl looked at Ran for a minute, eyes squinted. Eventually, she shook her head. “No. But, ma also says people who are always unhappy get better at hiding it.”
Ran’s grin faltered. Her unwavering stare started to unnerve him, especially after hearing such a heavy statement come from such a small package.
After a brief moment of silence, he chuckled softly, taking one last drag of his cigarette before flicking it away. He exhaled. “Smart woman.”
The little girl beamed, “Mmhm! My ma knows a lot of stuff.”
“Tsk. But not ‘Stranger Danger’, apparently.”
She tilted her head, curious. “Huh?”
“You shouldn’t be wandering around by yourself, let alone approaching someone you don’t know. ‘s not safe. Especially for nosy little girls who stick their noses in other people’s business. Your ma never taught you that?”
The little girl rolled her eyes, hands on her hips. “Duh. Of course she did. Everyone knows that rule,” she exasperated. Ran snorted, but yielded when she squinted at him, pointing as she sassed. “And I do so know you, so you’re not a stranger.”
This time, Ran couldn’t help the incredulous laugh. “Oh, you know me, huh? That’s not good. ‘m supposed to keep a low profile. Say, you ain’t a cop are you?” He teased, earning another eye roll.
“No. Too small to be a cop, dummy.”
“Oh, pardon me, I didn’t notice. Where do you know me from, then?”
The little girl pointed over to the building..where the executives were having their meeting. She beamed, “Ma’s works in there. On important people days she can’t get me from school, so she tells me to come straight here, and to not talk to the purple man that stands near the building. She says you’re mean.”
Ran smirked, then gave a half-hearted shrug.
“She also says you’re my pa. But, I never believed her. You’re too old.”
Ran’s smirk dropped.
Whether more from the first comment or the last, you decide. But, one thing was for certain: he needed another cigarette.
SANZU cackled watching some guy struggle to round up a couple of rowdy twins at the convenience store. One was knocking shit off the shelves while the other ran circles around the guy. It was what he needed for his bitch of a hangover, a good laugh to distract from the ache in his skull.
However, he wasn’t laughing for long when you came around the corner of the isle, holding a few items with a smile on your face that soon faded once you saw the scene unfolding before you; the pinkette thought he was still tripping balls. Blinking a few times to allow any after effects of the drugs to clear up, when you didn’t disappear he used his long legs to swiftly yeet behind one of the shelves, peering around it like some paranoid stalker. The last time you had spoken, you had threatened to castrate him with your teeth if you ever saw him again.
And he’d be damned if he tried your bluff.
He watched in awe as you straightened those twins up quick. If he didn’t know any better, he would’ve thought they were trained to obey you, and only you. Any other authority be damned. While the guy was putting all the stuff back on the shelves, sweaty and out of breath, you gently reprimanded them for causing trouble. You still made that cute pouty face you always did whenever you were mad at him…
“What did we talk about earlier? Hm? Mr. Satoru was very kind to help mama today, you know. You two promised me you’d be on your best behavior for him.”
Sanzu gagged. This was the rebound you let nut in you? This huffy moron who can’t handle a couple of ankle biters, this was your king? He had half a mind to just gut the guy to put him out of his misery from that pathetic display from earlier, alone. He couldn’t imagine how difficult it must be back home. He remembers when he was that age—Rowdy, reckless, the Antichrist. Adorable, but deadly. God bless that poor bastard’s soul.
Wait…Mister? Not…dad?
The first twin whined, stomping their feet. “He’s too boringggg!”
Come to think of it…if Sanzu squinted…the longer he looked at the little family…he swore the more he saw the resemblance of himself in the tiny gremlins. From the hair, to the eyes, all the way down to the mannerisms…Hang on. When had been the last time you two fucked? Three…no, was it four years ago?
The second twin huffed, pointing at the man. “Yeah! And he’s jus’ being nice so that he can sleep in your bed, mama!”
You flushed, nervously chuckling as you looked around to make sure no one heard. Sanzu ducked behind a bag of chips, now nothing but eyes peeking through the gaps of food on the shelf.
So…that loser’s not the father? Then…could that mean..?
“He’s mama’s boyfriend, remember? He’s allowed to do that. And he’ll be around for a while, so I want you two to be nice, okay?”
“…okay, mama.” They grumbled.
Sanzu almost popped a blood vessel, fist clenched around a bag of Lays and nearly busting it. He chuckled darkly, “Oh. We’ll see about that.”
Simon Riley really delving into his oral fixation.
See, you'd asked Simon to stop smoking after reading that it would damage his sperm. Trying for a baby apparently meant he needed to give up his vice.
But you were his missus, and he'd learned a long time ago—don't fucking argue with the missus.
Already by day three Simon was buying multiple packs of gum a day. Grumbling around base and the house. But he wouldn't take it out on you, never on you.
Your tits? Different story.
Simon had been sucking on your tits for almost an hour, switching between your now swollen and spit slick nipples. Yes, it felt fantastic—but Jesus Christ what was his obsession tonight?
"Simon." You murmur, tugging at his hair to pull him up. "You're usually inside me by now."
Simon grumbled, licking his lips. "You had me quit smokin' my fucking mouth needs to be doin' somethin'"
After that confession, Simon was always on you.
He comes home from work, and he pushes your shirt up while you read some book on the couch. His mouth immediately locking around your nipple. The tension built throughout the day leaving his body.
He'd suck on your tits of a morning instead of going for his usual smoke. Though you point out that he spends a lot longer on your nipples than he ever did his cigarettes.
You can't even take your shirt off around him without Simon pawing at your tits and sucking on you for at least five minutes before you finally batt him off to go cook dinner.
After a long weekend though, you went to work with sore tits. Your coworkers getting excited after hearing you'd been trying for a baby and now you were adjusting your bra all day.
Simon only chuckled when you complained to him that afternoon, letting you frustratedly throw your bra at him. "Just tell them that your husbands helping you practice for when you're actually breastfeeding."
sanzu hates when you leave headquarters alone after dark. every single time you insist you'll be fine, every single time he ignores you and follows anyway. he doesn't walk beside you at first - he lingers a few steps behind, eyes scanning the parking garage until you're safely inside your car. when you lower the window to complain, he rests an elbow against the roof with the most unimpressed look. "stop making me worry." he says it like it's somehow your fault.
ran loves making you laugh during the worst possible moments. if a meeting drags on too long, you'll glance over to find him already making ridiculous faces behind someone else's back, just subtle enough that only you can see. you have to bite the inside of your cheek to keep from smiling, and when you finally lose the battle, he looks unbearably pleased with himself for the rest of the afternoon.
you mention in passing that your shoulders hurt from sitting at your desk all week. the next morning, rindou silently replaces your office chair before work starts. no note, no explanation. when you thank him, he shrugs without looking up from his phone. "you kept stretching your back every twenty minutes." he'd noticed.
ran has absolutely no shame about stealing your attention. if you're talking to someone for too long, he'll wander over and casually rest his chin on the top of your head or lean an arm across your chair, pretending he's there for an entirely different reason. "sorry," he'll say with a lazy smile, "needed my assistant for something important." the important thing is almost never actually important.
every time someone asks you to carry something, sanzu somehow appears before you've even answered. folders, equipment, boxes, bags - it doesn't matter. they end up in his hands within seconds.
kokonoi starts betting with himself on how long it'll take one of them to notice you've skipped lunch. ran spots you still working, rindou quietly leaves a warm meal on your desk without interrupting, and sanzu spends the next hour glaring at anyone who tries to hand you more work before you've finished eating. kokonoi loses every single bet.
kakucho asks you to help organize documents for an upcoming meeting, only to watch the three executives slowly migrate into your office for ridiculous reasons. ran wants coffee. rindou "forgot something." sanzu insists he's checking security. after the fourth interruption, kakucho pinches the bridge of his nose. "...can the three of you survive one hour without hovering?" ran grins. "dunno." sanzu answers at the exact same time. "no."
you catch ran watching you from across the meeting room while everyone else argues over business neither of you care about. the second your eyes meet, he smiles like he's been waiting for it, crooks a finger for you to come over, and when you do, he quietly slides a wrapped candy into your palm. "good job surviving another meeting," he murmurs, chuckling at the way you roll your eyes.
mikey sits quietly at the head of the conference table, watching the room settle before a meeting begins. you walk in with everyone's coffee, and without a single word exchanged, ran takes the tray from your hands, rindou pulls your chair out when you move to sit at the side, and sanzu slides your cup onto the desk before anyone else can reach for it by mistake. it's so practiced it almost looks rehearsed. mikey blinks once, looks at the three of them, then at you. "...you've all made this weird." nobody disagrees.
when meetings run late into the night, you eventually start rubbing at your tired eyes without realizing it. ran notices first. he reaches over, plucks the pen from your hand, and closes the folder you'd been staring at. "that's enough." you try to protest, saying you still have work to finish. he smiles, soft but completely unmovable. "my favorite assistant is off the clock. the paperwork can miss you for one night."
rindou always knows when you've reached your limit, even before you do. you'll keep insisting you're fine, answering emails and taking calls with the same polite smile, but he'll quietly appear beside your desk with a bottle of water and your favorite snack. "five minutes," he says simply. you open your mouth to argue, only for him to look at you with that calm, unreadable expression. "...please." he still manages to convince you.
sanzu refuses to let anyone raise their voice at you. it happens once during a stressful shipment when one of the lower-ranking members snaps at you over a mistake that wasn't even yours. before you can answer, sanzu is already standing between you and him. "try that again." the room goes deathly silent. the man apologizes so fast he almost trips over his own words. afterward, sanzu turns back to you immediately, his voice completely different. "you okay?" he asks softly.
ran loves making you feel included in conversations you'd normally stay out of. during strategy meetings, he'll casually ask, "what do you think?" while everyone else looks surprised. you hesitate every time, but he waits patiently, smiling until you answer. if your idea works - and it usually does - he makes sure everyone knows it came from you. "that's why she's smarter than half of you."
whenever the three of them walk somewhere together, you somehow end up in the middle without anyone discussing it. ran strolls on one side, chatting about whatever ridiculous thing happened that morning. rindou stays quietly on your other side, matching your pace perfectly. sanzu trails half a step behind, watching everyone around you instead of joining the conversation.
someone flirts with you during a charity gala, completely unaware of who you're attending with. ran watches the interaction from across the room, taking slow sips from his drink just to see how long it'll last. rindou quietly moves closer without interrupting. sanzu lasts exactly thirty seconds before appearing beside you, slipping an arm across the back of your chair and looking at the stranger with a dangerous smile. "she's busy."
ran is shameless about praising you. if you solve a problem before anyone else notices it, he'll clap dramatically from the other side of the room. "this is why we keep her around." you groan every time because now everyone is looking at you, but he just laughs at the way your face warms. he genuinely enjoys seeing you embarrassed almost as much as he enjoys reminding everyone how capable you are.
rindou never asks if you need help in front of other people because he knows you'll automatically say no. instead, he'll quietly take over whatever you're struggling with while continuing the conversation as if nothing happened. you're trying to carry too many files? somehow half of them are suddenly in his hands. struggling to reach something on a high shelf? it's already sitting on your desk before you even notice he moved.
sanzu memorizes your routine without meaning to. he knows exactly what time you usually arrive, which elevator you prefer, where you leave your keys, how you take your coffee, and which route you walk through headquarters. if something changes, he notices immediately. "why were you ten minutes late?" he'll ask before you've even sat down. you blink. "...how did you know that?" he blinks back, equally confused.
after particularly dangerous jobs, the three of them have completely different ways of checking on you. ran immediately seeks you out with his usual grin, lightly flicking your forehead. "still alive? good." rindou quietly scans you from head to toe, making sure you aren't hiding any injuries before giving a small nod of approval. sanzu walks straight up to you, cups your face in both hands without caring who's watching, and mutters, "don't ever scare me like that again," before letting go like nothing happened.
rindou almost never interrupts the two of you, but if ran keeps you talking long enough that your coffee goes cold, he'll quietly replace it with a fresh one. he simply sets the warm cup beside your hand before taking the old one away. ran watches him do it and scoffs. "show-off." rindou shrugs. "she likes it hot."
sanzu cannot stand when either of the haitanis monopolize your time. if he walks into your office and finds ran sitting on your desk making you laugh again, he'll lean against the doorway with crossed arms until one of you notices. "finished?" he asks flatly. "we're in the middle of a conversation," ran replies. "you've been in the middle of one for twenty minutes." eventually sanzu just walks over, takes the chair beside yours, and inserts himself into the conversation without another word.
ran absolutely abuses the fact that you can't say no to him. "walk with me." "help me choose a tie." "come taste this coffee." every excuse is completely ridiculous, and you know it. half the time he doesn't actually need anything - he just wanted an excuse to spend ten minutes with you.
sanzu gets irritated whenever someone refers to you as "the assistant." "she has a name," he corrects automatically. the first few times people assume he's just being particular. after the tenth, everyone realizes he genuinely dislikes hearing you reduced to your job title. strangely enough, he's the only one allowed to call you my assistant, and even then it sounds less possessive of your position than of... well, you.
the three of them argue over who gets to drive you home like it's the most important discussion of the day. ran insists his car is more comfortable. rindou points out that his route is faster. sanzu doesn't even bother making an argument. he simply holds out your bag because he'd already picked it up five minutes ago. you sigh, looking between all three. "i live fifteen minutes away."
ran loves making you blush in harmless little ways. he'll compliment your outfit in front of everyone just to watch you duck your head, or casually mention that you remembered his favorite coffee order after only hearing it once. "see?" he says to the room. "she pays attention to me." you swat his arm, embarrassed, while rindou quietly points out, "she remembers everyone's." ran pretends not to hear him.
if you fall asleep at your desk, rindou is the first to notice - but he never wakes you. he lowers the lights in your office, closes the blinds, and places your abandoned paperwork in neat stacks so it won't wrinkle beneath your arms. when ran comes looking for you, already halfway through calling your name, rindou simply lifts a finger to his lips. even ran lowers his voice immediately.
sanzu has a habit of standing just a little too close whenever someone unfamiliar is talking to you. not enough to make you uncomfortable - he's careful about that - but enough that anyone else immediately understands they should keep things professional. once the conversation ends, you glance up at him. "you know i can handle myself." "i know," he says. "they don't."
ran catches sanzu staring at you across the room for the fifth time that afternoon and can't resist. "you know," he says loudly enough for only the three of them to hear, "if you keep glaring at everyone who talks to her, eventually she'll run out of people to talk to." sanzu doesn't even look away from you. "good." ran bursts into laughter while rindou quietly rubs a hand over his face. "you're impossible."
despite all the teasing and bickering, there's one thing they never argue about: if you're upset, everything else waits. ran drops the jokes immediately, his smile softening as he coaxes you into talking. rindou sits beside you in comfortable silence, never rushing you to explain. sanzu quietly stations himself by the door, making sure nobody interrupts. for once, they're perfectly in sync, making sure you're okay.
sanzu starts treating your apartment like an extension of headquarters. not in an invasive way - he still knocks, still waits for permission but somehow your medicine cabinet is always stocked because he noticed you were running low, your smoke detector batteries get replaced before they start beeping, and one day you discover he'd quietly changed the faulty lock on your front door because "it looked cheap." you only find out because your old key stops working.
the three of them somehow end up grocery shopping with you once, and it's an absolute disaster. ran keeps throwing snacks into the cart because "you looked at them for half a second." rindou silently puts back the things he knows you don't actually need while making sure your usual groceries are still there. sanzu pushes the cart like it's a security detail, glaring whenever someone gets too close. by the time you reach the checkout, you've somehow bought twice as much as planned and none of them agree whose fault it is.
ran absolutely loves stealing your phone the second you leave it unattended. not to read your messages - but to replace your lockscreen with the worst candid photo he's ever taken of himself. you groan every single time. "delete it." "no." "ran." "it's cute." rindou walks by, glances at the photo, and quietly says, "...it's really not." you laugh. ran looks deeply offended.
if you text the group chat saying you're sick, the responses come almost instantly. ran: don't move. rindou: what's your temperature? sanzu: who got you sick? within an hour, ran is making you watch terrible movies, rindou is quietly cooking soup in your kitchen, and sanzu has somehow acquired enough medicine to stock a small pharmacy. by the end of the day, the three of them are arguing in hushed voices over whether your blanket is warm enough while you're trying not to smile yourself back to sleep.
sometimes, on rare evenings when none of them have work, the four of you end up doing absolutely nothing. you're all sprawled around ran's living room, a movie playing that nobody is really watching. ran keeps making sarcastic commentary every five minutes until you throw popcorn at him. rindou is half asleep on the opposite end of the couch, quietly listening to the two of you bicker. sanzu sits on the floor beside you, resting his arm against the couch near your knees.
⊹ people assume he’d want somebody loud enough to match his energy but his entire life is noise, meetings, violence, people demanding things from him, chaos everywhere. when he comes home and finds you curled up on the couch reading or scrolling through your phone in complete silence, it genuinely relaxes him.
sometimes he’ll just flop down beside you and put his head in your lap. neither of you say anything for half an hour. he doesn’t need conversation. he just likes being near you. spending quality time with you is the best part of his day.
⊹ everyone in bonten knows you’re his weak spot. everyone knows. the second your name comes up, sanzu changes completely. his expression softens. his voice loses that dangerous edge. he’ll answer your texts in the middle of important conversations and not even try to hide it.
the funniest part is that he thinks he’s subtle but he isn’t. one time somebody joked that you had him wrapped around your finger. the room went completely silent. everyone expected sanzu to get angry. instead he shrugged and said, “yeah, obviously.”
⊹ he gets ridiculously soft when you’re affectionate first. normally sanzu is the clingy one. he’ll throw an arm around your shoulders, pull you into his lap, grab your hand whenever he feels like it. but the rare moments when you initiate affection - he completely malfunctions.
if you quietly take his hand first, he’ll stare at you for a second because he genuinely wasn’t expecting it. if you lean against him while you’re sleepy, he immediately goes quiet. he’ll act normal on the outside but he’s replaying that moment for the next three business days.
⊹ if you’re talking to someone else for too long, he’ll eventually wander over. if you’re sitting across the room, he’ll somehow end up beside you within ten minutes. if everyone’s gathered together, his arm ends up resting against yours before he even realizes he’s moved.
one night you’re sitting with ran and rindou while they’re telling some ridiculous story. you’re actually laughing - a rare enough occurrence. twenty minutes later, sanzu walks into the room, takes one look at the situation, and immediately sits beside you.
ran raises an eyebrow. “we’re having a conversation.”
sanzu glances toward you. “not anymore.” he says as he takes you over to his office.
⊹ there are nights when bonten keeps him out until ridiculous hours. nights where everything goes wrong. nights where he’s exhausted, irritated, and running entirely on caffeine and stubbornness. during those nights he becomes quieter than usual. not angry. just tired. and no matter how late it gets, eventually he texts you.
“awake?”
“you home?”
or sometimes just your name.
the first time it happens, you ask if something’s wrong.
“nothing’s wrong.”
“then why are you texting me at 3 a.m.?”
there’s a long pause. another minute passes. finally his reply appears.
“wanted to hear from you.”
⊹ he develops this habit of pressing a kiss against your forehead whenever he walks past you. sometimes it’s your temple. sometimes your cheek. sometimes the top of your head while you’re focused on something else. half the time he isn’t even paying attention to what he’s doing. it’s become so normal that neither of you notices it anymore until one day kakucho does.
you’re standing in the kitchen talking quietly about something. sanzu walks by, leans down, presses a quick kiss against your hair, and keeps walking without breaking the conversation he’s having on the phone.
kakucho stares.
“…what?” sanzu stares back.
“nothing.”
⊹ after something genuinely dangerous happens, sanzu spends the next few days sticking unusually close to you. he’ll deny it if anyone points it out. claim it’s coincidence. act irritated whenever rindou starts making comments but everyone notices.
especially you. he keeps reaching for you. checking that you’re there. touching your shoulder when he walks past. pulling you beside him on the couch. resting a hand on your back whenever you’re standing nearby. eventually you ask him about it.
“you’ve been acting weird.”
he looks at you for a second.
“thought I lost you.”
the words leave his mouth before he can stop them because sanzu almost never admits things like that. after a moment, he sighs and pulls you closer against his side.
despite being one of bonten’s strongest executives, kakucho unbelievably gentle with you. when passing you something, his fingers barely brush yours. if you’re exhausted, he’ll quietly take the heavier boxes from your arms without asking. if you fall asleep at your desk, he’ll drape his own coat over your shoulders before returning to work.
everyone else is intimidated by kakucho’s expression, but you’ve never seen him lose his patience with you. even if you accidentally interrupt an important meeting or make a mistake with paperwork, he’ll calmly help you fix it instead of raising his voice. he thinks you bring out the softest parts of him that almost nobody else gets to see.
he hates physical affection from almost everyone, but he’ll never move away if it’s you. if you lightly tug his sleeve to get his attention or accidentally lean against his shoulder while looking over documents, his body completely freezes. he won’t react outwardly, but his ears slowly turn red before he quietly looks away.
he is painfully aware of every man that looks at you. he won’t act jealous or possessive in front of you, but the moment someone lingers a little too long or gets a little too comfortable, they’ll find kakucho silently watching them from across the room. one look is usually enough to convince them to keep their distance.
he pretends your safety is only part of the job, but everyone can tell he’s far more protective than necessary. he’ll walk behind you whenever you leave headquarters, wait until you’re inside your apartment before driving away, and quietly check every room if you’re working late at one of bonten’s properties. he never tells you he’s doing it because he cares.
he keeps every little thing you’ve ever given him, even if it wasn’t meant to be meaningful. a sticky note reminding him about a meeting stays tucked inside his wallet for months. a pen you handed him never leaves his suit pocket. he tells himself he’s only keeping them because they’re useful, but he knows that’s a lie.
he always ends up wherever you are. you’re heading to the archives? he suddenly has paperwork there. grabbing coffee? he was “already walking this way.” leaving headquarters late? he just happened to finish work at the exact same time. he makes every coincidence look completely natural.
whenever you’re speaking during meetings, kakucho stops paying attention to everyone else. he isn’t even trying to stare, but his eyes always drift back to you. he catches himself doing it constantly and immediately looks away, hoping nobody noticed.
his phone is almost empty except for one thing: your contact. he doesn’t have a picture for anyone else, but yours is the first thing he sees every time you call. he’ll never admit how often he catches himself opening your conversation just to reread old messages.
kakucho has a habit of standing just close enough to make sure nobody bothers you. if someone starts raising their voice at you during work, he appears on your side out of the blue. he doesn’t threaten them unless absolutely necessary. he just stands beside you with that intimidating expression until the man leaves.
kakucho has an almost unhealthy habit of checking whether you’ve arrived safely. if you’re running late, he’ll glance toward the entrance every few minutes while pretending to read documents. the second you walk in, the tension disappears from his shoulders like nothing ever happened.
kakucho isn’t good with words, so every act of care is silent. your chair is pulled out before you sit. the office thermostat is adjusted because he noticed you looked cold yesterday. your computer is already turned on when you arrive.
sometimes he catches himself wondering what you’re doing when you’re off work, then immediately scolds himself for thinking about you so much. it never helps. somehow his thoughts always circle back to you before the day is over.
kakucho has never wanted anything for himself the way he wants you. it frustrates him more than anything because he prides himself on discipline, yet every thought eventually finds its way back to you. he hates how easily you occupy his mind, and he hates even more that he doesn’t actually want it to stop.
hearing you laugh from another room is enough to make him pause whatever he’s doing. he tells himself he’s only making sure everything is alright, but his feet always carry him a little closer until he can hear you clearly. once he knows you’re smiling, he leaves before you ever notice he was there.
he constantly has to stop himself from reaching for you. fixing the strand of hair that falls into your face, brushing dust from your shoulder, steadying you whenever you stumble over absolutely nothing. his hand always twitches first before he quietly curls it into a fist at his side.
every time you thank him, he has to look away. your voice is soft, your smile genuine, and he doesn’t trust himself to meet your eyes for too long without giving everything away. a simple “you’re welcome” is all he manages before pretending something else suddenly needs his attention.
there are nights when headquarters is empty except for the two of you. you sit across from each other finishing paperwork in comfortable silence, and kakucho secretly wishes time would stop right there. you’re close enough for him to hear you breathe.
he knows your schedule better than his own. when you take your lunch break, when your meetings usually end, what days leave you the most exhausted. sometimes he catches himself planning his entire day around moments he might run into you.
he never asks you to stay longer than necessary, even when he desperately wants another five minutes of your company. instead, he’ll quietly tell you to go home and get some rest, then watch you leave until the elevator doors close. only after you’re gone does the building feel strangely empty.
whenever you’re standing close enough for your shoulders to almost touch, he becomes painfully aware of the tiny distance between you. it’s barely anything at all, yet it feels impossible to ignore. he could close that gap in a single step, but he never does.
he wonders what it would be like to hear you say his name outside of work. not “boss,” not “sir,” not spoken during meetings or reports. just his name, casually, warmly, like he belongs somewhere in your life beyond business. the thought stays with him longer than he’d ever admit.
sometimes he’ll catch you smiling at him for no particular reason, and it completely ruins the rest of his day. now he can’t stop thinking about it. hours later he’ll still remember the exact way your eyes softened when you looked at him.
he has convinced himself that loving you quietly is safer than risking losing the place he already has in your life. so he settles for being the person who makes your work easier, carries the heavy things, walks you to your car, and silently hopes that’s enough to keep him close to you a little longer.
every goodbye feels heavier than it should. he’ll give you a small nod, tell you to get home safely, then stand by the window without realizing it until your car disappears from view. only then does he finally leave himself.
kakucho falls hard and silently. he convinces himself you’ll never return his feelings because someone like him has no place beside someone like you. so he settles for watching over you from a distance, protecting you without expecting anything back. as long as you’re smiling, he’ll carry those feelings in silence for as long as he has to.
༝ MIKEY
mikey tells himself you’re simply efficient, that’s all. that’s why he wants you nearby. that’s why the office feels strangely empty whenever you’re off work. that’s why he catches himself glancing toward the door every few minutes, waiting for you to walk in. he repeats the excuse so often he almost believes it.
you see the side of mikey that almost nobody else gets: the one who is exhausted. bonten mikey carries himself like someone who stopped expecting happiness a long time ago, but your presence reminds him of a version of himself he thought disappeared. he doesn’t become a completely different person, but the emptiness in him becomes less obvious when he’s around someone he genuinely trusts.
if someone speaks to you with even the slightest disrespect, the room changes instantly. mikey doesn’t raise his voice or make a scene. he simply looks at them, expression completely blank, and calmly tells them to apologize. nobody ever refuses.
the executives eventually realize the only person who can interrupt mikey without consequences is you. you’ll knock once, step inside with another stack of reports, and he’ll quietly motion for you to come in without even looking annoyed. everyone else would have been told to leave.
mikey has convinced himself that you’re safest where he can see you. that’s why your desk is just outside his office. that’s why he insists you’re the one accompanying him to certain meetings. it’s practical, he tells himself.
mikey hates seeing you scared, but he hates even more knowing someone was the reason behind it. the moment he notices your discomfort, his entire attention shifts. he stops caring about whatever meeting or problem was in front of him because, in that moment, nothing matters more than figuring out what happened.
mikey isn’t affectionate, but he constantly finds excuses to keep you close. asking you to stay while he finishes reading a report, requesting your opinion on things that don’t actually require one, handing you files one at a time instead of all at once. every extra minute with you feels selfish, yet he can’t seem to stop.
he doesn’t ask “are you okay?” the way other people do. he simply looks at you and says, “who did it?” his voice is quiet, almost emotionless, because he’s already trying to understand exactly what needs to be handled.
sometimes he reaches out without thinking. his hand moves slightly toward yours when you place a document on his desk, like he’s searching for some kind of reassurance, but he stops himself before making contact. then he pulls back and pretends he was only reaching for the papers.
he doesn’t understand why you treat him like a person instead of a title. everyone else sees bonten’s leader, someone dangerous, someone they have to obey. but you still ask if he slept, if he’s eaten, if he’s okay. those simple questions stay with him much longer than they should.
when you smile at him after seeing the worst parts of him, he looks away. he doesn’t know what to do with kindness that doesn’t come with fear or expectation. part of him wants to believe he deserves it, but another part of him is still waiting for it to disappear.
he doesn’t want you to see him as a monster, but he also doesn’t know how to show you anything else. every time he tries to be closer, he pulls himself back. he thinks distance is the only way he knows how to protect people.
mikey never asks you about your personal life because he doesn’t know if he wants the answer. he can handle enemies, betrayal, and pressure without hesitation. but the thought of hearing that someone else makes you happier than he does is something he avoids facing.
when you finally fall asleep beside him after another late night of work, mikey almost reaches out to wake you, to tell you to go home and rest properly, but he stops. instead, he quietly places his coat over you and lets you sleep.
and when you eventually wake up and apologize for falling asleep, mikey only looks away and says, “it’s fine.” he doesn’t tell you that he spent the entire time watching over you, or that for a few hours, his mind was finally silent.
you’re one of the only people who sees how much mikey still craves simple happiness. sometimes he’ll sit beside you in complete silence, looking unusually peaceful, and then suddenly ask for something random like getting his favorite snack.
he has a habit of seeking your attention without admitting that’s what he’s doing. he’ll interrupt what you’re doing just to show you something, ask for your opinion on things he already decided on, or sit closer than necessary because he wants you to notice him.
mikey’s teasing side only comes out around you because he trusts you enough to drop the serious act. he’ll make little comments just to see your reaction, purposely annoy you because he likes when you get dramatic with him, and sometimes act completely innocent afterward even though you know exactly what he was doing.
when he’s tired, the walls around him disappear the most. you see him become quieter, more clingy, and almost like the younger version of himself he tries so hard to bury. he’ll lean into your presence without thinking and let himself relax.
mikey secretly loves when you take care of him in small ways. he’ll pretend he doesn’t need it, but he never pulls away when you remind him to eat, rest, or slow down. there’s something almost childlike about how easily he accepts your care, because with you he doesn’t feel like he has to prove he’s strong.
༝ KOKONOI
kokonoi is surprisingly dramatic when it comes to you, but only when nobody else is around. the same man who stays calm during negotiations will act personally offended if you ignore his messages for too long or if you choose someone else’s recommendation over his. he’ll pretend he doesn’t care, acting cold and sarcastic, but the silence afterward makes it painfully obvious he wants your attention.
you see how different kokonoi is when he’s not performing for the world. around others, he’s confident, charming, and always seems like he knows exactly what he’s doing. around you, he can be weirdly indecisive. he’ll ask for your opinion on something small, pretend your answer doesn’t matter, then immediately choose what you suggested.
kokonoi’s jealousy is less about anger and more about insecurity that he refuses to acknowledge. he knows he can buy almost anything, solve almost any problem, and get almost anything he wants, but affection doesn’t work like that. when someone else makes you laugh or gets your attention easily, there’s a brief moment where he remembers that money has never been able to guarantee the things he actually wants.
kokonoi is someone who hates appearing vulnerable, so the moments where he accidentally reveals too much mean everything. like when he casually mentions something from his past and then goes quiet because he realizes he actually told you. or when he lets you see him exhausted after a long day instead of putting on the usual confident mask.
he has a strange habit of trying to fix everything for you because he doesn’t always know how to comfort someone emotionally. if you’re upset, his first instinct is to find a solution, remove the problem, or make things easier for you. he has to learn that sometimes you don’t need him to solve everything - you just need him to stay, and he’s willing to learn that for you.
kokonoi’s favorite version of you is probably the one that treats him normally. not the person impressed by his reputation, not someone intimidated by his connections, but the person who steals his food, laughs at his expensive habits, and tells him when he’s being ridiculous. he secretly loves that you don’t let him hide behind everything he built.
as his assistant, you quickly realize kokonoi is much more observant than he lets on. he notices when you’re staying late, when you look tired, when you’ve been skipping breaks because you’re too busy handling his schedule. he’ll never directly say “i’m worried about you,” because that’s not how he communicates, but suddenly there’s food on your desk, your workload has become lighter, and your meetings have been rearranged so you actually have time to breathe.
kokonoi is incredibly demanding with you, but not because he thinks you’re incapable. he trusts you more than most people around him, which means he expects you to keep up with him. he’ll correct you, challenge your decisions, and push you to improve, but you notice he never humiliates you or treats you like you’re replaceable.
you notice that when someone else speaks, he’s usually impatient, already thinking three steps ahead. when you speak, he actually listens. he might still have that bored expression on his face, but you know him well enough to recognize when he’s genuinely considering your opinion.
kokonoi has a habit of pretending he doesn’t rely on you. he’ll say things like “i could’ve handled this myself,” while handing you another task because he knows you’re the only person who can organize the chaos around him. he refuses to admit how much easier his life has become since you started working beside him.
he’s surprisingly annoying when he’s comfortable with you at work. he’ll call your name just to ask something he already knows the answer to, send you messages from across the room instead of speaking, or criticize your coffee choice like it’s a serious issue. if anyone else did it, he’d be unbearable, but with you it’s almost obvious he’s just looking for an excuse to interact with you.
kokonoi is very particular about your safety and position in the company. he doesn’t like other executives or employees taking advantage of you because you’re “just an assistant.” if someone dismisses you or talks over you, his entire attitude changes.
he notices your achievements more than anyone. kokonoi is surrounded by people who praise him because of his money and influence, so genuine effort stands out to him. when you do something well, he won’t give you some emotional speech, but you’ll get a rare “good job” from him, and coming from kokonoi, it means more than anyone else’s compliments.
sometimes you catch his softer side after everyone leaves. the office is finally quiet, his tie is loosened, and the confident persona fades slightly. those are the moments where he’ll actually talk to you about things unrelated to work, complain about his day, or ask your opinion on something personal.
he loves watching you get flustered, mostly because it’s one of the few times he feels like he has the upper hand. kokonoi is used to reading everyone before they even speak, but you’re the one person who can surprise him. he’ll casually lean back in his chair and make a teasing comment about how much you worry about him, only to act completely innocent when you tell him he’s being annoying.
he likes spoiling you, but he makes it sound like he’s just being practical. if you mention liking something once, he remembers it. if you complain about something being inconvenient, it somehow gets fixed. when you ask why he went through all that effort, he’ll shrug and say “I don’t like seeing you struggle."
he loves teasing you about how well you know him. if you predict what he’s going to say or bring him something before he asks, he’ll raise an eyebrow and say something like “you’re getting too good at this. should I be worried?” but secretly, he loves that there’s someone who understands him without him having to explain himself.
during meetings, kokonoi is completely professional, but you notice the little ways he includes you. he’ll ask for your opinion even when everyone else is waiting for his decision, glance at you when someone says something ridiculous because he knows you’ll understand his reaction, and sometimes hide a small smile when you try not to laugh.
he gets especially teasing when you’re trying to lecture him. if you tell him he’s working too much or needs to take care of himself, he’ll act offended and ask if his assistant is “giving him orders now.” but he never actually ignores you. in fact, you’re probably the only person in bonten who can tell him what to do and get away with it.
kokonoi’s romantic side appears in the quiet moments after work. when the building is empty and there’s no one around to impress, he becomes less like the untouchable businessman everyone knows. he’ll walk beside you, make jokes, complain about boring meetings, and enjoy the simple fact that someone is choosing to stay with him after seeing every side of him.
