samuel.

samuel carter. 26. Just a guy taking things one step at a time and trying not to trip.

[samuelcarters]

dexkennedy·:

Being single is fun too, but being married to the love of my life is really something else. I couldn’t imagine my life without her. She does some housework, we split the dishes and cleaning but I do all of the cooking since I’m a chef and love it. That would probably be a gift for both of us but it’s a good idea! Breakfast in bed is definitely a given. She can never have too many necklaces either. You’re good at this.

Yeah, I’m not in any rush, but if I find the right girl? I’m done. That’s it for me. Oh, you’re a chef? Then you definitely gotta do the breakfast in bed thing. Go all out with it. Maybe throw in a fancy mimosa or something. Women love those. Thank you. That’s what I’ve been saying this whole time.

[samuelcarters]

dexkennedy·:

My wife’s birthday is next month and I need someone to help me brainstorm what I can get for her. A little bit about her is that she’s perfect and nothing I get her will be good enough. But, okay, for real she’s really into fashion and she likes pink, gold, and silver. She hates doing house stuff, she loves shoes, and listening to new music I’ve never heard of. Help me.

Wow, this made me feel single as hell. Does she normally do housework? Maybe you could hire a cleaning company to come and take care of it, but I don’t know how romantic that would be. Or maybe breakfast in bed and a real nice necklace.

[samuelcarters]

parkerrhaynes:

Wouldn’t be the end of the fuckin’ world if I had to be a waiter, but bein’ a bartender is way more fun and the tips are awesome. Drunk people love tipping me. Nah? I got the shittest memory in the fuckin’ world and I can remember all the drinks, so you’d prob be just fine. It helps that before I was a bartender, I already knew every type of alcohol known to man and half the drinks’ names. Fuck, man, I feel you. Not really into dating, but if someone took me to McDonalds, I’d definitely go down on them. I seem like the type? Wow. Would be offended if I didn’t kinda take that as a compliment. I’ve had a lot of good times in the back of cars.

And I’m sure the people are way better than some of the parents who show up to restaurants asking why you can’t completely switch up the menu for them. I don’t know about that unless you could hook me up with a cheat sheet or something. I wouldn’t even know where to look if someone came in and ordered anything but a Jack and Coke. Damn, you should be in the next McDonalds commercial: things I would do for a McChicken. I wasn’t trying to offend, but I don’t know that I’d call it a compliment either. You seem like the type to have fun. Just don’t do it in the back of my car.

[samuelcarters]

ariannakiing·:

You better not be throwing a line around with that queen shit. But, I’m not hating it. I make it easy? Well, then, you can stay. You have my word that I’ll tell the truth, wouldn’t want to make your mama disappointed. That’s nice, just wouldn’t peg you for the piano playing kind of guy. Well, thank God you said it because I definitely was going to. At least tell me you don’t wear sandals and open flannel shirts.

Do I look like I just call anybody queen? Seriously? Are we supposed to act like you don’t own a mirror and know exactly what you look like? Yeah, I have no doubt you’ll only tell the truth. I wouldn’t hate a compliment here or there, but y’know. Truth and all that. What’s a piano-playing kind of guy supposed to be like, huh? And here I thought I was the next John Legend. They sort of ruined the guitar for me. Now I can’t bring it anywhere without looking like some stereotype from a John Green story. Nah, not a sandal dude. No one needs to see my feet.

[samuelcarters]

greysvaldez·:

Sure. Everyone’s got different standards tho. See, I like them hot but if it’s getting to the end of the night and I haven’t sealed the deal, I’ll settle for a 7. Lol yeah, man, you passed the test. Not that hard of a test. Don’t be too much of a dick, don’t throw a drink on me, don’t cockblock me and we’re all good.

Yeah, that’s not me, but good for you, man.  Damn, the bar’s really not hard for drinking buddies, huh. Glad I passed, though. You’re a pretty chill dude.

[samuelcarters]

parkerrhaynes·:

Being a bartender is fucking awesome, man, I’m not gonna lie. Love gettin’ money that night that I can spend right away. I’ll send you whatever you want, but if all you want is some fries and nuggets, you’re a real cheap date. Alright, cool, cool. I’ve probably done more in a Lyft before tho. Sometimes you just can’t help yourself and it’s easy as hell to forget someone’s in front, drivin’ you.

Yeah, I’ll bet. It’s like a server, but you probably get better tips, better customers, and you don’t gotta memorize all of people’s specific orders because they don’t like onions touching their chicken. I wouldn’t say no to ending every night with some cash tips, but I also couldn’t handle being behind a bar. Memorizing all those drinks? No way. Fries and nuggets sounds like an awesome date. I don’t think I’d ever take a girl out for that because I value not having things thrown at my head too much, but if someone did that for me? Oof, I’d be in love. Yeah, I shoulda seen that coming. You seem like the type.

[samuelcarters]

greysvaldez·:

A man can have more than one motto, can’t limit yourself like that. Oh, you got high standards or something? Glad you had a good time tho, you gotta come out with us again sometime.

Doesn’t everyone have some sort of standards? I’m not really one of those guys who hooks up with someone just to get laid. Seriously? I passed your test?

[samuelcarters]

lucywestbrook·:

I’m glad I give off that kind of vibe, but, hopefully, it doesn’t make me sound too pretentious. What is your drink of choice?

Not at all. You can be fancy and classy without being pretentious. I’m a basic Jack and Coke type of guy. But between you and me, I’m not gonna say no to some of those strong, fruity drinks they serve at bars.

[samuelcarters]

parkerrhaynes‌:

Damn, I was so close. Yeah, man, that’s def a good idea, but I’m not gonna say no to you ordering another side of fries for your dear ‘ol friend me. Hey, I’ve been there, so I get it. Oh, shit, really? I’ve made out with more people in a Lyft or Uber than I can count. If I ever did that in your car… my bad. Hell yeah.

Man, you’re a bartender. On a slow night, I’m sure your tips could get you a dozen orders of fries. If anything, you should be the one sending me over some fries and nuggets. Making out is fine. Annoying, but nothing I can’t handle by turning the music up a little louder. It’s when hands start going into the unknown that I need to draw the line.

[samuelcarters]

ariannakiing·:

Please keep on your telling your truths if they involve complimenting me. I mean, always tell me the truth, but especially then. Promises and talk are cheap, I’ll believe it when I taste it. Oh, nice. Why not? Electric or acoustic?

Will do, queen. You make it easy, so expect plenty of compliments. Alright, alright, that’s fair. I’ll let you be the judge of my cooking skills. I just prefer piano and most of my songs pair up better with that style of music. Acoustic. The same kind that annoying college dudes play in the middle of campus. 

[samuelcarters]

parkerrhaynes·:

Hey, man, that sounds kinda awesome. Too bad I fuckin’ hate driving. I would probably be that guy that eats everyone’s fries or whatever before I got to their place. Drunk people are hilarious but, yeah, them pukin’ all over your own car sounds like hell. A smelly hell. If you think I’m not gonna do just that, then you def don’t know me. I’ll make sure you drive me somewhere nice and fun.

Then I guess you’ll have to stick to staying on the other side of the app. Damn, remind me to never ask you to pick up some nuggets and fries. They can be. They’re either a lot of fun or doing their best to not pass out before they get home. I just draw the line at them hooking up back there. I’m not getting paid to deal with that happening two feet behind me. Yeah? I’ll hold you to that, man.

[samuelcarters]

ariannakiing·:

Wow, beautiful, huh? You just scored yourself a whole lot of brownie points there. Absolutely. can’t be disappointing your mom. Really? Do you sing or play an instrument or both?

Like I said, I’m just here to tell the truth. I’m no good at lying. Never, so you know it’s going to be a good meal. I sing and play piano. I know guitar too, but I haven’t picked one up in a while.

[samuelcarters]

lucywestbrook·:

I can’t remember the last time I had Fireball. It seems like the kind of drink you only take shots of, and I’m not really a shots kind of woman.

I can see that. You definitely strike me as the classy type when it comes to alcohol. 

[samuelcarters]

greysvaldez·:

Well, it’s one of them, yeah. Got a lot of mottos for the right moods. Shit, you serious? Sorry, dude, doesn’t sound like your night ended with a bang. Should have let me play wingman for ya.

Seems to kind of defeat the purpose of a motto, but you do you. No, no, you didn’t have to do that. I had a good time. There just wasn’t anyone there I was crazy interested in.

[samuelcarters]

parkerrhaynes·:

Ugh, nevermind. Wouldn’t care about strangers in my car but the whole driving shit, nah. Bet you have a lot of conversations that are fun as hell. Probably got a lot of drunk people in there.  Aw shit, really? Just ruined my night, man. Wanted to ask for you.

Yeah, it’s not so bad unless you’re not a fan of driving. My friend does Doordash and he says it’s awful. His car’s always smelling like 50 different types of fast foods and I’m not here for that. Oh yeah, the drunk people are always wild. Not always the best conversations, though. As long as they don’t throw up, I don’t mind getting them to their next party or wherever they’re going. Sorry, man. You could always keep requesting and canceling Ubers until you get a Sam, but that might piss some people off.

[samuelcarters]

jessmumus·:

What are your feelings about frosting? We started trying to make these little cookie sandwiches with different kinds of cookies and frosting.

Uh, do you get a lot of different answers on that question? Because anyone who doesn’t like frosting is probably not from this Earth. That’s not even true. I bet even aliens love frosting. When is frosting day? I’m coming in.

[samuelcarters]

ariannakiing·:

I hope it is too. If I’m going to die, it better be the best meal I’ve ever had. Wait, do you really want to be in the movie business?

Oh, it will be. My mom would be so disappointed if I brought someone beautiful over to my house and didn’t serve them the best meal they’ve ever had. No, no, no. Definitely not. I’m more of a music guy.