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ilyas-left-nut

he knew exactly what he was doing to that poor little Canadian gay kid

Why not

ilya and cliff are the matt damon and ben affleck of #my gc universe. there are whole insta pages and twitter accounts dedicated to finding pictures of them engaging in the most overtly homoerotic bullshit known to man (it's not difficult. there's a lot) and quotes from interviews where they wax poetic about each other like "he's the greatest man i've ever known and my best friend. i'll love him for the rest of my life."

they're all captioned Which Could Mean Nothing and regularly break containment on hockey twt. which may in part be because ilya won't stop retweeting them.

#heated rivalry

maryoliveoil

So fucking sad.

Actress Hayden Panettiere has died, her representative confirmed to ABC News on Sunday. She was 36 years old.

#hayden panettiere

childhoodarchive

rip to hayden 🕊️💔

#hayden panettiere

from3am

Troy Barrett, former best friend of Dallas Kent, has an redemption arc but it’s giving “i can excuse racism, but i draw the line at [SA]”. Except pretty much no one has said “you can excuse racism?!” and is instead just giving him the benefit of doubt because he finally drew the line somewhere like that is how things work.

sarah1281-takethree

Oh but remember we “don’t have proof he was ever racist “ because it’s technically possible I guess they hated on every other minority but respect all races 😣

#heated rivalry #I can’t even with that take #of course they were racist

decepticonsensual

Not to be all "the children have forgotten the sacred texts!" but I just saw someone refer to a ship between two people who are good friends in canon as a crackship.

Hon. No. Crackship doesn't just mean "not canon". It's difficult to imagine two people who spend significant canon time together as a crackship. Crackship is when you write Galactus getting fucked by Tony the Tiger.

decepticonsensual

Gotta say, my absolute favourite notes on this so far have been the number of people congratulating Tony on his rebound from the Grinch.

iteration-dave

sophsun1

Gilmore Girls – 2.10: The Bracebridge Dinner

#gilmore girls

userbrielarson

KARA ZOR-EL SUPERGIRL (2026) dir. Craig Gillespie

#supergirl

rainbow-femme

I love confident smart competent Svetlana, but I do also need her to be a little bit pathetic and for a big part of her friendship with Ilya to be them lamenting how shit they are at relationships

Svetlana: RED ALERT

Svetlana: GENERATIONAL FUMBLE

Ilya: You asked about their favorite hockey team and then spent fifteen minutes roasting it didn’t you

Svetlana: I thought it was friendly banter and then he went to the bathroom and didn’t come back

Ilya: It’s not banter if you’re the only one talking and he’s sitting there silently weeping into his Bud Light

Svetlana: Remember when you told Jane how much you liked fucking me while trying to lock it down?

Ilya: 🖕😘

Svetlana: 🖕😘

rainbow-femme

Ilya: Holy shit holy shit holy shit I think we’re actually together. Together together. He wants to be with me he wants to spend his life with me he fucking LOVES me Sveta holy fucking shit I don’t know what to do or say holy shit

Svetlana: WHAT

Svetlana: Every detail. NOW

Ilya: He said he loves me! He made a whole ten year plan so we can be together holy shit I don’t think I’m breathing. I don’t think I’ve breathed since he said it holy shit

Svetlana: Oh my god I am so happy for you, I can’t believe it I’m going to cry in the club

Svetlana: How did this even happen? Did you ask him if he still wants it after Florida? Did he bring it up?

Ilya: …

Ilya: Don’t get mad.

Svetlana: How could I be mad at you right now?

Ilya: It may be because I said I would marry you for a green card.

Svetlana: …

Svetlana: BOY-

#heated rivalry

from3am

Someone will accuse me of reading the wrong genre again but i am sorry i don’t think a romance should involve the HEA being ‘get the [guy] at all costs’. I am mad as hell when the random white women quits her NYC job as named partner and moves to her home [Christmas] town to spend more time with her new husband and i will be mad as hell when Shane has his legacy ruined to [checks notes] quit his job, move back to his hometown and spend more time with his husband.

#heated rivalry

emziess

Connor Storrie as Ilya Rozanov Heated Rivalry, S01E05

#heated rivalry

lizardsfromspace

The best part of the theme restaurant boom of the 90s is that the downfall of most of them was their total apathy to the food. It's really something to read a interview about people investing hundreds of millions into a chain of restaurants, where they care deeply about the Hollywood props and themes on display, and then it comes to what people will eat in them & they shrug and say they're "not a food guy"

lizardsfromspace

Planet Hollywood was basically unworkable from the start and went bankrupt by the end of the 90s bc of ridiculous over-expansion (Planet Hollywood, a chain with mediocre food pitched as a one-time ~Themed Experience~, had a location in Indianapolis), which makes it more wild how hard they spun it off. In the mid-to-late 90s, EVERYTHING had a Planet Hollywood

There was All-Star Cafe, for sports

There was also ESPN Zone, another Planet Hollywood of sports, which looked like a fuckin NORAD Control Room for sports???

There was Sound Republic, the Planet Hollywood of music, a joint venture with MTV (I can't find any images of this or solid information?)

There was Motown Cafe, a Motown themed restaurant that never had a location in Detroit. This one had musical guests and singing waitstaff

(for the record, Hard Rock Cafe is a British chain dating back to the 70s, and is the originator of this trend and not a member of it)

There was Fashion Cafe, the Planet Hollywood of fashion; apparently the menu was just Applebee's-tier fare, with supermodel names attached, which just about sums it up

There was Marvel Mania, a Planet Hollywood for Marvel Comics

The WWF had a restaurant, The World, in New York...

AND a WCW restaurant, the WCW Nitro Grill, that opened in 1999, just two years before the WCW itself would fold (the restaurant lasted until late 2000).

There was Jekyll & Hyde Club, the Planet Hollywood of Victorian gothic horror, with ANIMATRONIC MONSTERS and in-character Mad Scientist staff, which closed in 2022 and I'm just hearing about now???

This isn't even all of them, it's not counting the ones that only ever had one location, or non-restaurant ones like the arcade chains Sega Gameworks or DisneyQuest. People in the 90s could not resist a restaurant founded by famous people with sort-of-bad food and a lot of props...once, all of these places went bankrupt as hell before the end of the decade and some lasted less than two years

lizardsfromspace

I came across a thread with more information on Fashion Cafe, which was probably the worst of these? Bc it had the blandest food - a seven page long menu, but all of it was fast casual fare with supermodel's names attached - with the owner stating you can't "go too deeply into fashion" at the restaurant for fashion. That's the article I found confirming the detail that Fashion Cafe apparently spent months hyping up a costume from The Nutty Professor remake, to the point of holding a party for it, bc apparently their display of memorabilia was just random costumes celebrities donated.

A fine vintage of the 90s themed restaurant: a theme with no clear connection to food, a generic yet (presumably) overpriced to hell Americana menu, a focus on merchandise above food (they touted how well their t-shirt sold), the dregs of whatever memorabilia Planet Hollywood wouldn't take, and owned by brothers who were committing massive fraud and were convicted of it (but later pardoned by Trump)

lizardsfromspace

Okay so I found the menu on the Wayback Machine archive of Fashion Cafe's website. It's a bit of a dig bc the site highlights its merch much more than the food, but you can find it by digging into each location's page.

There are two themes:

generic food items with a model's name in front (one of three bc they only signed on three people)

And generic items with "fashion" put in front of them

You could walk into a vaguely fashion-themed scam restaurant and get a "fashion hamburger" for just $7.95. Which is actually close to $16 in today's money. Which is probably more than the fashion burger is worth. If you're ever in 1997 don't eat here

Especially since the page is full of typos? "trditional". "mixed lattuces". The bold and unprecedented apostrophe work going on in the shrimp.

lizardsfromspace

There was Michael Jordan's restaurant, the Planet Hollywood of Michael Jordan. Based - of course - in Chicago, it may have also been called Michael Jordan's The Restaurant based on this bag someone posted

A brief video is available of the interior.

As with most restaurants like this the food was generic Americana, and it served one of his wife's recipes ("put this recipe from my family on the menu" is also a hallmark of this genre, allegedly the only input *any* of the Planet Hollywood founders gave on the food was Arnold demanding they put his family schnitzel recipe on the menu). But Michael Jordan didn't own the restaurant, he licensed his name to two developers and got a royalty and private rooms on the second floor. It opened in 1993 and closed in 1999 under a cloud of controversy - in the wake of Michael's second of three retirements, the owners wanted to remodel it as Sammy Sosa's Restaurant and Michael Jordan objected. They also claimed he never went to the restaurant when he claims to have gone to his private dining room weekly (whether he ever swung by the dining area, I can't say). And so it closed and never reopened; the location is now Hawksmoor Steakhouse

But Michael Jordan wasn't done, because in 2000 he opened...

...Michael Jordan's 23 in Chapel Hill, North Carolina. Information on this one is even more scarce and I can't find a picture of the exterior, but this one only lasted until 2003.

He also has a branded steakhouse now but I don't care about that

stillnotmollified

Maybe Cliff Marleau is such a chill himbo because he’s literally seen it all before.

Maybe Cliff Marleau is a vampire, and after a hundred or so years of living, not much fazes him, man.

Sometimes, on the road, when Cliff is running low on blood bags, Ilya lets him feed. There are chemicals in vampire saliva that cause sexual euphoria in humans—to ensure the survival of the species—and Ilya has gotten a not-insignificant number of hard-ons over the years while Cliff sucks at his wrist.

Ilya maybe came in his pants the first time. It doesn’t mean anything; it’s just biology. Cliff and Ilya understand each other. They both have their secrets.

#heated rivalry