and it was not a pretty sight.
For me, the two most hated things in the world to do would be, in this order... Running and Puking. And since 90% of the time, the two coincidentally clash hand in hand I stay away. Far away.
You see, I have a big decision looming over me. I couldn't sleep. Woke up at 5:00am. First thought I had was, "Okay, God. I'm up. Let's talk it out." Then I went downstairs, cracked open my Bible and read a few verses. Looked outside and thought, "I'm going to run this morning."
If anyone knows me, they know my body proportions aren't exactly the most graceful. I swear my legs are half my body and my arms are the other half. It's hilarious to watch me play Volleyball and Basketball. Which is another reason why running doesn't sync well with me. I'm not built to be a runner. I'm the girl struggling on the sidewalk that looks like her arms are built to propel her into outer space. It's a sight to see, for sure.
So, miraculously the thought I had whisked me off my comfy couch and in no time I had my running leggings on and my running sweater, which by the way I only have these items because they are extremely adorable. I had to find my running shoes but once I brushed away the dust and slipped my size 11 feet into them, I felt ready. I couldn't find headphones but I thought I would be too busy sprinting anyways to deal with cords flying around my face.
I tiptoed out the door as quietly as I could and slipped my phone away into a hidden pocket in my super cool running leggins and took a deep breath of the morning air. This morning it seems that winter and spring were dueling. There was snow on the ground but the air was amazingly fresh and clean. Also, side note, it was raining. Not too hard but hard enough to make me completely drenched in 25 minutes.
I did a mini stretch and started out with a light jog, within the first minute I was rudely interrupted by two mangy beasts barking like crazy at me, so I slowed it down, didn't want to give them something to chase. Once they were seized, I began again. At first, it wasn't too bad. I was looking around, enjoying the scenery. Everyone's still asleep at this point, even the sun. It was wonderful. Then the burning started. At first, it was in my knees. Got to love those good ol' knees. Then in my calves. Then in my side. Then last but not least, my lungs. Once the burning reaches my lungs there's about a minute left in me before I vomit chunks. Avoiding this scenario, I pushed myself to the top of the hill and just stood there.
I'm so glad everyone was asleep here. I was wheezing like crazy, bent over with my arms over my head, doing absolutely everything I could think of to catch my breath then I realized how bad of an idea this was. I mean, I don't run. I find no pleasure in it. I'm a walker. I like to walk. Walking is nice. Walking is slow and walking doesn't involve my body rejecting oxygen. So, I continued on, walking.
Then I noticed something interesting. I can walk about 4x faster than I can run. I can extend my 5' long legs to their max and I can book it like nobody's business. This is great! I was breathing. Not in pain, and feeling like I looked pretty good.
AND that's why I was supposed to run.
I woke up this morning wanting to spend time with God. Instead, I felt I was supposed to run, turns out, the whole running bit was another big lesson from the Big Guy Upstairs.
You see, for me, my life is always predictable. Easy breezy. Not too many complications. Maybe I oversleep once every couple months. Maybe I catch a cold. All common things that don't shift me too much out of my zone of sanctuary. When I'm faced with a decision that could alter the essence of my perfectly placed livelihood...things begin to tremble.
So, basically, my life is walking.
and lately, I've been asking for a life that requires a bit of running.
I've found that not only has God given me running. He's giving me suicides, burpies, flutter kicks, and sprinting. Everything my body and my spirit, does not enjoy.
but you know what, right now, I'm about to hop up and get ready for work in hyper speed but before I do that, I'm going to say how awesome I feel right now. I feel like I just kicked my butt and I know tomorrow I'm going to be able to push myself just a little bit more, even a couple inches. Running builds the body to go farther, push harder and be stronger. Walking. Doesn't.
I don't want to be someone who's happy living their life like a long walk on the beach. I want to be someone who's life is the equilivent of a trek through the grand canyons. I want strength and endurance, but am I ready for the burn?
I guess that's what I have to figure out.
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