sara @sarathezombiemaster - Tumblr Blog

I personally do not have trauma with the slur q*eer (I have bad experiences of being called that against my consent by LGBT people, but I don't count that as trauma). But the thing is, it's literally a homophobic and transphobic slur, and I have trauma with homophobia. So by extension, knowing what the slur means and how it came to be applied to LGBT people (because of homophobia and transphobia) is enough to make me feel scared and alienated when I hear it (even if it's used in a "positive" way).

I personally don't understand the logics of slur reclamation. I haven't seen people talk about this so I'm talking about this. People who reclaim the q slur say it's "taking the word people call you to hurt you and turning it into the jewel in your crown" or something, but I do not see it that way. To me, calling yourself a slur just means agreeing with your oppressors. In the context of the q slur, calling yourself that just means agreeing with homophobic/transphobic people that you are weird and abnormal. If it weren't for homophobic society, there is no reason I would ever think that I am abnormal or weird, so why should I call myself this word?

I do not want to resist homophobia by reclaiming a homophobic slur. Saying "being q*eer is good" does nothing to challenge cisheteronormativity or homophobic beliefs, and in fact reinforces cisheteronormative beliefs by the implication that there is a "normal" and a "weird."

A lot of self-identified q*eer people talk about how proud they are to be weird. They "challenge homophobia" by saying "what's wrong with being weird?" (implicitly agreeing that LGBT people are weird) rather than saying "why do you see anything other than cisheterosexuality as weird" (challenging cisheteronormativity, homophobia and transphobia). And thus, people who reclaim the q slur see themselves as q***r as in "different." Different from what? They claim they are so radical but the basis for their identity is not a definition on its own, e.g. lesbian as in a woman exclusively attracted to women, but in relation to unjust norms (weird in the context of cisheteronormativity). They never challenge the norms, they just agree with the norms! I can never see myself as q*eer because I know I am normal (in that I naturally exist as I am) and am only seen as "weird" due to violent and factually incorrect ideologies. I would challenge use of the q slur by saying "you're homophobic and wrong, you have no right to say that" rather than "yes I am, fuck you."

Obviously, people have the right to reclaim slurs as an individual strategy or in protest contexts, but the problem is when a homophobic and transphobic slur is normalised as an umbrella term. That is not even reclamation anymore, it's just forcing a slur and associated self-othering ideologies (calling yourself weird for existing) on everyone. It's also forcing the logics of reclamation on everyone, because everyone is forced to accept the idea that "slur reclamation = empowering."

What's truly empowering to me is defining yourself as you are, and seeing yourself as normal in this cruel world that calls you weird and abnormal. LGBT people are not the abnormal ones -- if anyone should be called weird and abnormal, it's homophobes, biphobes and transphobes. Why should we LGBT people agree with how bigots see us?

#q slur #lgbt community #slur reclamation #queer is a slur #lgbt

animentality

thememedaddy

What's up with people praising homophobic religious people for saying "I don't agree with/our religion doesn't allow LGBT stuff, but I still respect LGBT people"?

These people are not being open-minded or kind for having a "live and let live" attitude. They clearly don't actually respect LGBT people; if they did, they would be against their religion's homophobia, rather than saying "oh, my religion doesn't allow LGBT stuff." They clearly still have homophobic beliefs, because they still uphold a homophobic version of their religion, and when they say "I respect LGBT people," what they really mean is "I am not going to be openly homophobic because I recognise that it is socially unacceptable in many contexts to be homophobic and force my religion on other people and I don't want to be seen as a bigot." But they will force their homophobic beliefs on other people in their own church/family since it's not as "public."

It's so sad that religious homophobia is so normalised that people think homophobia is a valid religious "belief," and that if some religious person says "it's against my beliefs but you can do what you want," they're praised a lot for being "tolerant."

Come on, if some racist white person said "it's my religion to not accept people of colour existing, because according to my religion, everyone has to be white, but I still respect people of colour, since I won't force my religion on anyone," they would rightfully be condemned for racism and no one would accept what they're saying. But if homophobic religious people say something similar about LGBT people, others say "wow, you're so kind!" or something.

#anti religion #lgbt #homophobia #tw homophobia #religion is evil #anti homophobia #zero tolerance for homophobia

sotrias-labyrinth-deactivated20

I feel like ODD being an official disorder in the DSM should be the thing that makes everyone go “hm” about how psychology is practiced

txttletale

[looking a child directly in the eye] i diagnose you with Shitty Bitch Syndrome. this makes it legal to do medieval german tortures to you by the way

cringepics

cmon man

picklepuffin

Hi I have an undergrad psych degree! I also have ADHD! In my motherfucking TEXTBOOK, the authors said, “Research describes ADHD as a neurodevelopmental disorder in the same vein as Autism. We are putting the (miniscule) section on ADHD in the same chapter as ODD, though, because we believe really these disorders both boil down to ✨️ people not doing what we tell them to because they are lazy✨️”

So my actual TEXTBOOK admitted that it was biased and teaching these disorders based on opinion and not up to date research. And, as described above, the section on ODD was basically just, “these are bad kids. We will not look into why or how or what comorbidities exist and we will also not be exploring the possibility of ODD really being a manifestation of trauma/undiagnosed adhd/autism/pathological demand avoidance/persistent drive for autonomy. We will however be mostly focusing on how annoying these kids are to their parents and teachers ✨️”

It’s fucking crazy. “Yeah we know lots of people with autism struggle to follow demands. They may either ignore/not register demands or have meltdowns when demands are placed. They may engage in physical aggression, verbal aggression, and property desctruction when directed to complete tasks or be exposed to uncomfortable sensory input. They may need to know the why behind demands and consequently argue with authority figures. They may be easily upset by sensory input or social interactions and have emotional outbursts when pushed beyond their limits. Some children with autism seek attention and may engage in maladaptive behaviors to elicit the attention of peers and caregivers if positive attention is not given freely/if they are ignored when behaving appropriately. All of these are symptoms of their underlying neurological differences and should be met with compassion and understanding. They are not bad children. Their brains process information differently and therefore they have executive functioning, sensory processing, and emotional regulation challenges that cause these behaviors.

Those kids over there? Yeah they have all the same symptoms but they are just Morally Wrong and Bad Children. They have Oppositional Defiance Disorder. How can I tell? Well that one hand flaps and that one doesn’t.”

brightlotusmoon

glorioustidalwavedefendor

How would you even measure that?

Things adults wrongly identify as arguing:

Asking for clarification

Asking any kind of question

defending yourself

answering a question teh adult has just asked you

breathing

Existing

Oh, also:

Race and the Mental Representation of Individuals Diagnosed with Oppositional Defiant Disorder: Implications for Diagnosis

Results: Classification images (CIs) showed that the children selected as having ODD appeared more prototypically Black in facial appearance than children not chosen as having ODD. No differences emerged in the gendered appearance of the two group-level CIs. Judged rates of ODD were higher for the children who appeared to be Black. However, diagnostic judgments of clinical trainees and practitioners were unaffected by appearance factors, suggesting that formal clinical training might attenuate the influence of stereotypes on judgment. Discussion: These results indicate that an overlap in Black stereotypes and diagnostic criteria for ODD might contribute to elevated diagnosis of ODD in African American children.

whereserpentswalk

Overwhelmingly Black diagnosis.

Pathologizes problems with authority to dismiss them as irrational.

isuggestrevolution

i have a suggestion

greatwomanofherstory

secularsasquatch

tboy-cock

hey yall know that reclaiming slurs doesnt mean using the slurs against people as slurs right? like when normal people say "reclaiming slurs" what we mean is taking away the power of the slurs by using them for yourself or your loved ones who reclaim it so when youre called a slur your brain goes to "oh, all my friends!" and it doesnt sting so bad, we're not saying to just call people slurs because youre a bigot whos hiding behind your identity

capricorn-0mnikorn

Reclaiming a slur is:

taking a stone that's thrown at you, polishing it into a jewel, and putting it in your crown.

Reclaiming a slur is not:

catching a stone thrown at you, and hurling it at someone else in turn.

haleyhalcyon

That’s why the Q-slur “reclamation” effort does not reclaim the Q-slur in any meaningful way. The Q-slur became an insult because sexual minorities are seen as weird and unfit for polite society. The Q-slur activists do nothing to remove that insult. The Q-slur activists wholeheartedly believe that “WE’RE here, WE’RE q***r”, and gatekeep out LGBT people who are actually hate-crimed by that slur—both by traditional bigots and Q-slur activists.

tboy-cock

ok anyway. heres you using queer as a slur in my comments

haleyhalcyon

oh how DARE i call someone the q-slur who identifies as the q-slur 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

tboy-cock

yeah somebody reclaiming a slur doesnt mean that its ok to just call them the slur AS a slur. that's entirely what my post was about, calling someone a slur isnt the same as reclaiming it. the issue is that youre not wrong that queer is a slur and shouldnt be just blanketly applied to every single person in the lgbt community because it IS a slur and can really upset people, and especially the elders in our community. but then you just turn around and use it as a slur and completely destroy your own argument. a trans person might call themselves a tranny but if someone just turned around and called them a tranny as a derogatory term, that doesnt mean that the former ISNT just calling them a slur

haleyhalcyon

what is the point of somebody “reclaiming a slur” if that somebody still takes offence at being called that slur, the one they “reclaimed”.

especially when it’s a taste of their own medicine.

“i get to call all lgbt people the q-slur because i reclaimed it. you don’t to get to call me the q-slur because it’s a slur.” hypocrisy at its finest

tboy-cock

theyre not the one upset, IM saying you shouldnt call people slurs. especially when youre advocating for people to not call you THE SAME SLUR. idk why its hard for you to understand, you seem to be very adamant that queer is a slur and people shouldnt call you that, which is what this post is about, but then you turn around and use it against other people. it doesnt matter if theyre upset or not, the fact is that youre calling someone a slur that you say people shouldn't be using

of course, you arent actually saying that queer is a slur because you care about how people feel about being called a slur that they dont want applied to them. you just hate politically queer people. you're probably a republican larper who thinks that theyll spare you if you put down your community enough. its not actually about decency, you just want to call people slurs. you can just be honest with us. just dont pretend to be a morally superior person advocating for them not to call YOU a slur that youre clearly very comfortable using against other people

haleyhalcyon

So you agree that people shouldn’t call others the Q-slur, and yet you’re mad that I’m demonstrating to them that it’s bad to call others the Q-slur, instead of being mad that they’re calling me and sexual minorities like us the Q-slur or else fuck off?

You say you believe that “you shouldn’t call people slurs”. And yet your reaction to me using the Q-slur as the slur that it is betrays your true beliefs: you care more about making a spectacle out of us sexual minorities than normalizing us and campaigning for our rights.

If you call yourself “q***r”, and you put yourself in “the q***r community”, neither you nor anyone else can be mad when someone calls you that slur. Obviously.

sarathezombiemaster

@tboy-cock you're a hypocrite! When you have no way to defend your inconsistent beliefs about the q slur, all you can do is accuse people of being a Republican even though you have no evidence!

Also, how can you even tell that Haley is using the q slur "as a slur"? She's just calling people who reclaim it what they want to be called. Many people who reclaim the slur call themselves q***rs as a collective.

#q slur

transcephalopod

there's something so alienating and painful about seeing things described as "queer" and knowing that, by the intention of the person saying it, it includes you because you're gay or trans or whatever. but you reject the word "queer" for yourself so thoroughly that the community/event/book/whatever doesn't register as including you even though you know it's supposed to. it's like seeing someone wearing your skin. and it's completely and totally inescapable if you want any hope of connecting with other LGBT people.

transcephalopod

in the best possible case, if you ask nicely, people don't call you a queer to your face, but you're still forced to implicitly accept the label and you have to see and hear the word constantly. in the worst possible case, you get someone going "all our words are slurs, you assimilationist! queer as in fuck you!" as if you're one of the straight homophobes that "term "queer as in fuck you" was originally used to confront and not an LGBT person who finds an anti-LGBT slur hurtful. nightmare world. can you imagine this happening to any other minority group.

#q slur

anarchistfangirl

"should I write-" Yes. Yes you should write. "But it's bad". WHO FUCKING CARES! WRITE IT. "It's bad". AGAIN WHO CARES? you want to write it. WRITE IT. you have an idea. WRITE IT. in times where AI is taking over people's critical thinking and creativity, writing is resistance. Writing is radical. Imagine! That in times where people are using AI to make their fucking grocery lists, you making use of THAT SUPER SEXY BRAIN of yours is bloody badass. So fucking write it. "but who will read?". Does it matter? Write it for yourself. People will read. Write that fanfic. Write that drabble. Write that prompt and let someone take over it. Write your thoughts. Write about what you love. About what you hate. Your feelings. fears. dreams. Ambitions. About what turns you on. or ticks you off. WRITE ✍️ IT! Write for joy. Write to let go. Write for yourself. People will find it. Write because you want to. Because you have something to say. Because your voice DESERVES to be heard. Don't let these bigass fuckass AI corps make you forget what it means to be human. Write as a form resistance. Write because you don't deserve to be overtaken by AI. Write because it's one of the most radical things you can do in these times.

if you're looking for a sign to tell you whether you should write something, the take this post as that sign. WRITE 👏 IT.👏

transcephalopod

happy pride month to LGBT people who still resist being categorized under the q slur and reject the reframing of the community's focus away from same gender attraction/transness. there are other people like you out there, no matter how loud everyone else is.

haleyhalcyon

⚠️ CW: The Q-slur, used uncensored. ⚠️

The whole fervor around the Q-slur is so incomprehensible to me because it’s backwards from every other epithet for an oppressed and alienated minority.

For comparison, if you say “illegal aliens” you get a flurry of angry corrections that rightfully point out that you’re abnormalizing them. “Illegal” strips these people of the legitimacy to exist, despite that “no human is illegal”. “Alien” means “abnormal”, “foreign”, and “weird”, despite that many of these undocumented immigrants pay into the US’s tax and Social Security system (like any other American) and get nothing in return (unlike documented Americans).

Just recently, the White House published an ICE Deportation Tracker themed around the movie Alien, and all of you rightfully got outraged that these people—We say “undocumented immigrants”, excuse you very much!—are not “alien” invaders that “walk among us”.

We say “undocumented immigrants” to normalize them; we say “illegal immigrants” to abnormalize them.

But here’s what grinds my goddamn gears: Why do so many of you love that abnormalizing slur for sexual minorities?!

“Queer” means “odd”, “weird”, “abnormal”, “alien”. Even before it first referred to gay people, it had many negative meanings in slang, like “fake” and “shoddy”. By all accounts, it should be as sternly frowned upon to call LGBT people “queer people” as it is to call undocumented immigrants “aliens”.

And yet. And yet! For some incomprehensible reason, the very people who should be championing sexual minorities’ right to exist as a normal part of any society are instead also calling us “queer”, and meaning it! We are already abnormalized by cis-hetero-patriarchical society stabbing us with “smear the queer”, and now our supposed “allies” and “community members” are backstabbing us with “WE’RE here, WE’RE queer”! Instead of pushing back against that crushing oppression, they decided to become the other arm of the vise grip!

Make it make sense! Why is it not cool to call someone an “alien”, while it’s totally hunky-dory to call someone “a queer person”?! They should be both unacceptable in any reasonable society.

No group of people should be abnormalized, no matter how “progressively” or “inclusively” you think you’re doing it.

#q slur

theonion

Responding to conservative backlash over a large selection of offerings for the month of June, Target announced Friday that they would scale back their gay pride section to a single t-shirt, saying they’d do a threesome with a girl for their boyfriend’s birthday. “It’s a one-night-only thing, and we’ll both do stuff to him—nothing to each other,” reads the bright, graphic t-shirt in large rainbow block letters, the detailed rules of the encounter continuing in smaller letters onto the back, which Target representatives called “the perfect compromise to make everyone happy.”

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bumblingbee1

Hey, nice to see someone else on this website that understands why the q slur is harmful. Thanks for your posts!

Of course.

Honestly, I myself used to be under the impression that the q-slur was never a slur and that it applied to everyone. But then I listened to people who knew more than me and I changed accordingly.

While we technically can't stop people from calling themselves that, the least we can do is to spread awareness of the term qu**r as a slur and the trauma connected to it.

The fact of the matter is, many LGBT people of any generation still have trauma from the Q-slur to this day. LGBT people have been called the Q-slur while being subjected to homophobic and/or transphobic violence, from verbal abuse/harassment to physically/sexually violent hate crimes and anywhere inbetween.

And while the Q-slur becoming many people's "umbrella term", those LGBT people in question are being ignored at best and alienated/treated like "traitors" at worst. And it's because of this that I reject the Q-slur for myself.

I can't tell people to stop calling themselves the Q if what's what they do. But I will continue to tell them to keep traumatized LGBT people in mind and remind everyone that not every LGBT person calls themselves the Q-slur. It's still a slur to many of us, and that should be respected.

ouellette

happy pride to all the lgbt people who are uncomfortable with being called the q slur and are forced to see their community being called by it again and again this month

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sara