Will Write For Food

Writing around Brooklyn taking pictures, gathering strange, interesting things I find on the interwebs...

[scarlettrobot]

MOVED

Haiii, if you would like to keep reading my sparsely posted blog posts, I’ve taken my show on the road... okay, I just moved it to another site. 

https://scarlettrobot.squarespace.com/

I feel like a big girl now. LOLOLOL JK JK

Thank you to all 3 people who will actually read/care about this. <3

[scarlettrobot]

Friday Night Micro-Aggression Session.

I went to a symphony concert last night. It was last minute- my friend invited me just hours before. I went straight from work to meet up with my friend. No time to change, so I wasn’t wearing my finest threads, but didn’t look reprehensible.  The concert was absolutely beautiful. The music was mostly by Brazilian composers and no joke one of the compositions sounded like something straight out of Wakanda. It was by Heitor Villa-Lobos, Chôros No. 10, “Rasaga o Coração.”

Afterward, we went to the reception since my other friend’s mom was in the orchestra. She was lovely. Anyway, the friend who invited me (also a poc) and I were standing and eating near the bar when a white man rolls up next to us while we’re mid-bite and starts talking.

     “My friends and I are wondering where all these people are coming from. Did you go to the show,” heavily implying we did not seem the type. We said yes and told him we really enjoyed it, explaining which piece was our favorite. His face contorted in confusion as if the song described hadn’t been apart of the repertoire. He then asked what we do. My friend told him his profession and I said I work at a startup. The man thought I said Starbucks and asked me about the sensitivity training employees had to go through after the Philly incident. I looked at him bewildered, and corrected him, “Start Up, not Starbucks,” I laughed, but internally was like-

Granted, ‘Startup’ and ‘Starbucks’ can sound quite similar when you’re chewing on a meatball. HOWEVER, a few things here:

1. We were visibly in the middle of eating and weren’t even talking to each other, so it was an awkward moment for a stranger to start a conversation.

2. Even if I did work at Starbucks, it’s another weird thing to bring up in a situation with people you JUST met- ungracefully and with questionable intention.

We then learned he was a minister and grew up in Japan with minister parents. He even has his own church in the east village - gawd bless. I know this isn’t fair, but all I could think about as he was telling us this was colonization, imperialism, and self-righteousness that comes with the idea that ‘others’ need to be taught Christianity to save their ‘savage’ souls but I digress. That topic warrants a whole other post.

At this point, he seemed to have gotten what he came for- making us uncomfortable and plugging his church. He walked away and I was very annoyed. Later on that night my friend and I revisited the conversation. I usually try to give white people the benefit of the doubt, but most times the conclusion remains the same: If I was white the conversation/situation would have gone differently.

This was certainly not as bad of an exchange as it could’ve been but micro-aggressions are still unacceptable. It was a violation of our space and comfort. There’s no escaping this behavior. People always say New York City is so progressive but there isn’t one inch of this country that is completely impervious to racism/prejudice.

At least the symphony and chorus was dope. Even he couldn’t ruin that.

https://www.grsymphony.org

[scarlettrobot]

No, it’s not scholarly - it’s racist.

My head is reeling from reading an article on the National Review site tweeted by Jeffrey Wright about the importance of proactive policing and the significant positive implications of gentrification. 

“A black New Yorker is 50 times more likely to commit a shooting than a white New Yorker.” Hmm…I’m slacking. https://t.co/Sj8YgxpgJi’

The overarching theme of the article is that gentrification is the reason for the crime drop in New York City and that ‘cop critics’ don’t have any justification for their outcry against police brutality because whatever the cops are doing is directly influencing the decrease in crime rates- this includes stop and frisk and other unsubstantiated practices. The whole article is an insult to anyone with a comprehensive- no with an ounce of understanding of the history of violence perpetrated by police at alarming levels against the black community. Anyone who grasps the history of this country can surmise that the relationship between the black community and police is not a spontaneous manifestation of tension- this article talks about the Black Lives Matter movement in such a cavalier naive way. This sentiment about injustice when it comes to condemning black lives has been incubating for centuries. It’s also known there is a direct correlation between crime and economic hardship. When this country understands that slavery has been and continues to be a blemish on our history and its affect are felt present-day will we ever get passed these putrid allowances of ignorance that everything is so simple (no pun intended) - black and white. 

There were a few passages in this article that really feeds into the rampant racism that the president has encouraged in this country. And that’s another thing. This presidency. It has ripped open wounds and incited crimes of hatred like no other presidency in history. There’s no way that reality can be disregarded at this point. Anyway, I digress. Here are some of the most blatantly racist passages I’ve seen on a national publication:

This demographic transformation has enormous implications for crime. A black New Yorker is 50 times more likely to commit a shooting than a white New Yorker, according to perpetrator identifications provided to the police by witnesses to, and victims of, those shootings.

(This is about the gentrification of Bed-Stuy. Barf.)

——

When the racial balance of a neighborhood changes radically, given those crime disparities, its violent-crime rate will as well. (This racial crime disparity reflects the breakdown of the black family and the high percentage of black males — upwards of 80 percent in some neighborhoods — being raised by single mothers.)

(I mean, I honestly thought she was just going to come out and say the N-word at this point. I’m not even sure what this is supposed to convey to support her argument. It’s just an empty generalization that was thrown in here to infer some nefarious ideas about black families.)

——

It is that gentrification which is now helping fuel the ongoing crime drop. Urban hipsters are flocking to areas that once were the purview of drug dealers and pimps, trailing in their wake legitimate commerce and street life, which further attracts law-abiding activity and residents in a virtuous cycle of increasing public safety. 

(It’s like she’s saying, gentrification is wonderful for crime since it means pushing POC out of neighborhoods so white people can ‘virtuously’ live their lives. I CANNOT.)

This article had my head spinning and I was at a loss at how something so blatantly biased could be published under the guise of journalism and not OPINION because that’s what this sounds like to me. The facts presented are rolled up into a self-righteous, pious assortment of conjecture and perspective. It’s beyond disrespectful/insulting and solidifies what everyone already knows- racism is alive and thriving in America.

[scarlettrobot]

Believe Them.

You should believe women.

Think about how immensely difficult it must be to talk about sexual assault. Think about our society and how sex is still seen as this unholy, unspeakable act of hedonism. Think about how women are objectified in film and TV. It’s improving, but it’s still nowhere near okay. 

Think about women and how they’re taught to be demure, soft-spoken, to take up as little space as possible. Think about trans women who mostly don’t even get a fighting chance in this world because there is a violent resistance to their very existence. Think about how they have to operate differently in the world as women because people don’t understand how women can still be women in a nonheteronormative/strictly binary sense. Think about how these women don’t get common, decent respect. Think about how people won’t value them as people- HUMANS. We must be better as a society.

Think about all those things and then think about the reactions you’ve had/you’ve seen to sexual assault when even a shadow of a doubt is cast on the accuser. Think about how the first reaction is, what was she wearing. Think about how she’s instantly labeled something fiercely harsh and explicitly, negatively sexual because she was violated. Now think about why it may take so much time for a woman to think about all of these things, have to weigh the backlash for an assault on their bodies, and maybe think it’s not worth it while the men go on to assault their next victims. It’s because society breeds an acceptance of this behavior. It’s because it’s too much to think about and even more to remedy. It’s because we’ve grown so accustomed to letting men get with abusing women, instilling misogyny into the core of American values.

You should believe men.

Think about how hard it is in a society that embraces hyper-masculinity to a fault. Think about how men have been taught to ignore or suppress feelings so as to not seem like ‘a girl,’ because femininity is the enemy in a patriarchal society. Think about how men are assumed to be the aggressor in any situation, especially in a sexual situation. Think about the rigidity of male sexuality and the continued stigma of the expression of love between two men. Think about how this dynamic is problematic. Think about how men don’t want to come forward because of this blatant stigma. Think about the church. Think about the many cases of abuse that have been denied or paid off. Think about how these very instances have made men and boys not even involved with the church see how abuse isn’t taken seriously in a place where you’re supposed to feel the safest. If there’s no justice there, then why even bother reporting sexual abuse.

Sexual assault is not exclusive to gender, sexual orientation, identity, politics, religion, race, creed. It has nothing to do with political correctness or policing rights. It has everything to do with respect. It has everything to do with valuing a human as a human and knowing that basic human rights are being scrutinized, analyzed, conjectured, but not thought about as THE BASIC HUMAN RIGHT TO NOT BE MOLESTED, TO NOT BE TOUCHED, TO NOT FEEL UNSAFE. It’s a basic human right to privacy of your fucking body and to feel unsafe in any situation because someone doesn’t feel they need to respect your body is intrinsically unacceptable. No one- NO ONE should be made to feel sexual assault is allowable EVER.

So, when there are men/women being accused of sexual assault. BELIEVE the accusations. Yes, there is that tiny percentage that throws everyone off, but look at that percentage and think about the many women in your life. Would you rather immediately negate their accusations and continue this outrageous cycle of victim-blaming, or would you rather give that woman space and time to share her story without instant judgment?

All the women and men who have been so brave to come forward have been a true inspiration and I hope this momentum continues so we can all learn and grow from this blaring mistake of our past. Unfortunately, the leader of the land has yet to face any consequences of his actions, but I have hope that these other accusations will pressure the GOP to do something right and good for once.

[scarlettrobot]

It's a man's world.

*Sitting in the corner of a six-person seat on the metro north feeling strangely uncomfortable not only because I’m squeezed near the window surrounded by men, but feel like they expect me to fold within myself to take up less room while they manspread all over the place. 

The man in front of me keeps stepping on my foot but in a very awkward way that makes me think he’s not just fidgeting but intentionally encroaching on my space. This. This is what it feels like to be a woman every day. There are moments I have every single day that make me grossly aware of my womanhood. In a way that makes me feel worried about my safety. I worry men will take advantage of me or mistreat me solely because they feel they can. Ugh, he’s seriously pushing his feet onto my side so my legs are sandwiched between his. I’m literally trapped here.*

This brings me to that protest on twitter that was ultimately about women being attacked and silenced both in social media and IRL. The entire point of a protest is to make people uncomfortable and to shed light on an otherwise ignored or (another word for “not thought about”) idea. That particular protest I felt went beyond just Rose Mcgowen’s account vein suspended and extended to every woman who has been the subject of men’s oppression which is let’s face it - all of us. It’s about calling attention to the injustices women face for just being a woman.

When the protest started there was immediately a backlash. People were saying silence was not the answer and that it’s silly to stop speaking since that is literally the point. That this platform gives you a voice. I get that. However, being off Twitter- one social media platform among very many- isn’t silencing yourself considering there are plenty of other ways to get your voice heard including, calling your senator to make sure women’s rights are in the forefront of their minds, writing pieces on inequities and misogyny that exists in myriad ways in society, speaking IRL to young women in your community encouraging them to speak up if they’re faced with oppression. Look at the attention that little hashtag got. People are talking and that is how change starts. Regardless if you don’t agree with this particular tactic. It worked. Twitter is now cracking down on trolls. Praise be.

UNFORTUNATELY, shortly after that hellish train ride, I had another questionable encounter with a man who asked me for directions then began to tell me he worked for [insert large entertainment company here] and asked if I had a few minutes to spare as I was walking to the train. He told me he wasn’t hitting on me, which I honestly didn’t think he was doing until he said it. I told him I didn’t have any time to speak at the moment and he told me earlier in the conversation he had a card but didn’t make any moves to offer it to me after declining his request to speak somewhere. It was all too much in the wake of the Weinstein I felt stupid and a little slighted that 1) I didn’t get that card, 2) was possibly being coerced into an uncomfortable situation 3) I’m completely overthinking this and that man was just being kind but in this day and age you can never fucking tell so you have to put your guard up and keep your wits about you so you don’t fall prey to a ‘nice guy’ trap because men are somehow getting angrier and stealthier about hurting women.

In this day and age, it’s been so hard to grasp reality and today was just super frekkin weird one.

* Note: I wrote that first part while literally on the train as it was happening. Writing is the only thing that kept me sane while I silently suffered. Yes, I feel like I should’ve said something, but I’m awful at confrontation and it paralyzed me. I’m not proud of it and I hope I can find the strength to be more vocal if anything like that ever happens again.

[scarlettrobot]

...But it’s ‘had a place in this country’ for centuries.

Okay. So I know America on a large-scale is finally seeing that racism and bigotry 'have no place in this country,' but let’s not forget these notions aren’t new. For centuries certain people have profited and thrived off racist social structures that perpetuate unequivocal inequality. An inequality that stems directly from the racism that's inhabited this country since its settlers murdered the Indians and stole their land. White superiority isn't new and has been around for centuries, manifesting itself in myriad ways including, but not limited to, colonialism, imperialism, capitalism, slavery, apartheid, trickle-down economics, Jim Crow, Christianity (heyyyy white jesus), gerrymandering, ambrosia, the list goes on.

This brutal history of not only the US but the world has afforded privilege that so many people deny exist. Even reading that will upset people- even reading that there’s a privilege associated with skin color makes white people feel uneasy. It’s okay to feel uneasy and uncomfortable. The only- I repeat - the ONLY way this country is going to move forward is for white people to acknowledge there is a difference in this country between white people and POC when it comes to how institutions treat people. Damn, how people treat people. Period. This is all part of a larger conversation that will not only heal this country but make it that much stronger. 

I just don't want this momentum, this passion to relieve the country of white supremacy to dissipate and we slow down these imperative discussions. It’s going to be hard and especially difficult, but we as a nation seem to be ready to deal... or at least talk about these issues head-on and that gives me hope. Although, it’s taken centuries to finally get here.

This leads me to people who are surprised by these groups’ existence and organization. Guys, these assholes have been around for-lest we not get it twisted- literally hundreds of years under various names. And for all of these politicians making statements denouncing those racists that pretty much got them to where they are today well, it's more than a bit frustrating to continuously hear. It's as if all of a sudden politicians need to make these statements to avoid any further scrutiny when, before Charlottesville, most of those officials were dead silent when the president was making a mockery of our democratic republic just weeks prior, embarrassing us all with- well, by just being.

All those republicans, specifically, who are coming out and saying how horrible white supremacists are and how they're un-American is completely laughable considering those are the very things that got the head of their party, the real Donald dump, into office. Those are the core values he ran on- hate, prejudice, sexism and anti- 'political correctness' (or as I like to call it, being fucking polite). There's no way I can believe a republican who's backtracking now in fake astonishment because Drumpf has not once made any utterance that would even remotely give anyone the inkling he would do or say anything appropriate during a crisis like this. Like, duh.

I'm not sure if it's delusion or denial at this point. Those same republicans didn't say a peep when Trump said things like Mexicans are rapists and literally asserted a judge wouldn’t be able to do his job fairly because of his heritage. No, they DEFENDED HIM. Now they’re denouncing hatred as if they weren't in silent compliance (or active agreement) throughout the entire election. I don't care about their announcements. They mean nothing and are solely a means of covering their ass so they can get re-elected. And you know what, they will, because there is still a portion of this country who do believe there’s an ‘attack on whiteness,’ and who do believe they are better than anyone who doesn’t look like them. They will continue to vote against their best interests if it means they’ll somehow be afforded a better shot at being a billionaire or something with a republican representative in office and that’s the truth. How? Why? The psyche of a Trump supporter is beyond me. If someone can crack the code to get them on the same planet as the rest of us, please share. These factions thrive off of their fear and intolerance and continue to build a base of evil, not just from Trump supporters, but any white person who believes equality equals depletion.

In summation, these horrendous notions are not new, and it’s up to the rest of us to quell this shit before anyone else gets hurt. UNITED WE STAND.

[scarlettrobot]

So much more than a protest over a statue...

I’m sitting here with literal tears in my eyes reading/watching all the shit going down in Charlottesville as white nationalist take to the streets to protest… the removal of a stature and (let’s not sugarcoat it) the fact that brown people also exist on this planet and have a rising voice in the future of this country.

This certainly isn’t the first protest of white idiots carrying guns and antagonizing people of color- ie read a history book. This certainly isn’t the first time hate speech has led to violence in the south- or anywhere for that matter. And it is most certainly not the first time the sane people of this country have united against evil/hate. However, it is one of the first gatherings of these bigots post Trump that has incited a STATE OF EMERGENCY and has made it crystal clear that their numbers are on the rise and that they are ready to willfully commit illegal acts to get their message across. It works for them considering the way the law works tends to turn a blind eye toward white men’s indiscretions.

It’s interesting though, because if you listen to this video of them chanting ‘white lives matter’ (though nobody has ever said otherwise) either due to the counter-protesters or the poor enunciation of the phrase, it sounds surprisingly like they’re changing ‘black lives matter.’ I find this infinitesimally satisfying.

When they’re chanting ‘you will not replace us.’ Who the hell are they talking about? They’re talking about anyone who doesn’t believe what they believe, look how they look, and dare to have opinions that challenge their self-importance. There has been an undeniable rise and vigor to this movement of hate all due to the current president’s unrelenting encouragement of prejudice, injustice, and violence against anyone who stood in his way. Seriously, it’s mind boggling how quickly people want to forget that there was an election that put this orange danger in office. Now his voters are called ‘supporters’ and we’re supposed to forget that it is them who organizes these rallies. I for one will not let it go and I’m tired of being told that I should ‘move on’ and ‘accept the results.’ This violence is a direct manifestation of his presence in the white house and his lack of empathy for this country.

He will not call this protest exactly what it is. An act of domestic terrorism. Sure, maybe in the beginning it was just chanting and speeches, but it has escalated into an all out frenzy.  If you haven’t seen it already, the video below from @brennanmgilmore is horrifying. Click at your own discretion.

Video of car hitting anti-racist protestors. Let there be no confusion: this was deliberate terrorism. My prayers with victims. Stay home. pic.twitter.com/MUOZs71Pf4

A pure and simple act of violence that injured a number of people in the name of an ideology that has led to the downfall of civilizations.

And the spray-tan-in-chief’s words, an empty string of hackneyed phrases and trite words of comfort. The moment he said, we must condemn bigotry on both sides, and repeated ‘BOTH SIDES’ as if this kind of behavior has been displayed by counter-protesters was so abysmal, I had to stop listening. There isn’t a moment of his presidency where he’s surprised me, but this particular moment did make my blood boil. 

This hate isn’t going away. Sure, it helps that there were more counter-protesters in this particular instance, but their base is getting stronger and more abhorrently insolent. We can’t ignore this moment in time, and we cannot tolerate this behavior.

Fuck that free speech argument. They’re looking for war and they’ve made it abundantly clear.

UPDATE: Someone lost their life after that car mowed down people and it’s reportedly a YOUNG WOMAN. Her life was prematurely taken away due to domestic (white) terrorism. Two police officers who were coming to assist with this racist turmoil also lost their lives in a helicopter crash. This shit isn't helping anyone. We need to do better, nation.

[scarlettrobot]

GoT, guys, GTFO.

Game of thrones creators making a show about the south winning the civil war is one of the most insensitive, culturally tone-deaf notions to come out of HBO’s think tank in a while. 

It’s another statement about progress meaning nothing in the wake of a big paycheck and the insufferable ignorance of some people. It’s exhausting. I’ve written this before and I’ll write it again. IT’S EXHAUSTING to live in a society that is constantly telling you the atrocities of the past have no effect on your future and to ‘suck it up’ if you feel discriminated against. No. That is not the proper response. In fact, the way some Americans react to serious allegations of racism is with something that is vaguely (explicitly) reminiscent of a sociopath. The text book definition of a sociopath is as follows:

ˈsōsēōˌpaTH/

noun

a person with a personality disorder manifesting itself in extreme antisocial attitudes and behavior and a lack of conscience.

I mean….

Where is your conscience when you completely dismiss an entire community of people because  you don’t understand their plight?

Anyway, this is a terrible idea and I’m appalled by all of the people this concept had to pass through before the show was announced and that somehow it still got funded. Not surprised! Appalled. Now, like, can I still watch GoT?! I’m not sure I can…. but gd it the WINTER IS COMING.

Sigh. Just when I think things are looking up, society has me swallow a whole 28932199393 gallons of get real.

This is a tender moment in time where people are just realizing the intricate complexities of race in America, and then this garbage is announced and it just feels like we’re taking so many steps back. I hope enough people show their disgust, because this is just plain shameful.

[scarlettrobot]

Africa, right?

The airport is always a lot. People are rushing or not rushing. Standing still or weaving through crowds. It’s a place where people go to escape or to return. To go off adventure or come back and ruminate.

Many different people are rotating in and out of those doors, so it was strange to have this experience with one of the attendants while I was having a hard time using the self check-in machine.

That machine is a whole different story. It was aggressively unintuitive and the instructions were sparse. I’m not sure how anyone was able to check-in without assistance, but I digress.

Anyway, back to the person who helped me and subsequently surprised me.

My machine was flashing a message that let me know I needed assistance. The first thing he asked me for when he came over was a Visa. So, I rummaged through my wallet to show him the card I used to buy the ticket. He looked at it perplexedly, and then said, no I mean your passport. I chuckled at myself in the moment but that was really strike one. Oh, I said, I thought you meant my credit card. No, he said, slightly amused. He left and I continued the check in process poking at the screen, entering all of my info until I came again to another roadblock. I looked around and he was close by, helping other people with this horrendous check-in machine. We made eye contact. How can I help miss, he asked, focused and ready to assist. “It’s asking for my email and address but I can’t keep going.” “Did you put in the country?” “Yes.” “Two letters?” “Yes.” He finished up with the person he was working with and they went off triumphantly as he walked over and took a look at my screen. “Country?” He asked again. He pressed some areas of the screen, “Africa, right,” he asked distracted. I didn’t say anything as he continued assessing. “Ah, forget it. You can hit cancel.” I nod. He hits cancel, “I don’t know why it wasn’t working. That’s a new screen.” “Oh. Well thanks,” I grab my baggage tag and attach it to my bag and he’s already walked off attending to other struggling people.

I’m not sure if it was because he was distracted or stressed out but the situation was uncomfortable now that I think back to it. I mean I appreciate his help because otherwise I probably would have been there for another 30 minutes trying to figure out how to get that thing to work. I’m going to chalk up what he said to an honest misunderstanding but in this world of high tension, it’s hard not to ignore instances like this. Anyway, I’m in France. We’ll see what kind of interesting stories I’ll have to tell from here.

[scarlettrobot]

I can’t see, your hair’s in the way

Soooo I have finally done it. I have finally started wearing my hair “out.” This means all of my hair in it’s curly glory is unleashed unto the wold, vulnerable to judgement and rejection, approval and pride, confusion and dismissal. 

For a while I didn’t wear my hair in a ‘fro because it just didn’t ‘feel right’ but then I started to think about where those feelings were coming from and dissecting them to see if it was some crazy self-loathing or embarrassment that stems from American society’s idea of beauty. In the end, I do think it was a bit of that, because let’s be real, it’s hard to be impervious to the onslaught of beauty standards that berate us everyday. But, it was also my preference to wear my hair in twists because it’s a style that doesn’t dry out my hair within minutes and I can wear that hairstyle for a few days (ahem, weeks) without having to mess with it. I’m very low-maintenance, so the thought of doing cute styles everyday would put me in shock. I’m slowly overcoming my aversion to spending more time on my hair. Ha.

So, whatever, I did it. And I love it. However, I do want to share an instance where my full head of kinky hair wasn’t so appreciated and I was so surprised and taken aback at WHERE I felt this incredible discomfort and more so sad as to the probable reasons why:

My little sister’s dance recital for an all-black dance company.

There were quite a few things going on before I even stepped foot into the theater that made me a little uneasy, including the fact that my little sister was required to wear a weave (which she looked adorable in- but still), as were all of the ladies in the dance company. I understand the creative desire for uniformity when putting on a show, but because our culture has been so ravaged by history it seems like maybe putting young black girls in straight weaves isn’t the best way to encourage confidence, but I digress. What went on in that show is a whole other blog post. 

Anyway, so I’m sitting down watching these super talented kids bop around stage when I feel a distinctive tap on my shoulder. I turn around and this girl tells me in the most condescending, self-important tone that my hair is in the way and that she can’t see and asked me if I could ‘move the the left’ so she could see.

Honestly, I don’t mind someone asking me to scoot over if my hair’s in the way, but sweet jesus they better do it in a way that is respectful. This kid made it seem as though I was wearing a giant sun hat that haloed 8 feet around my head. The way she said ‘your hair is in the way,’ my hair may as well have been live cockroaches crawling all over her. Needless to say I wanted to level her out right then and there. Of course, I refrained because the thought of actually getting into a physical fight with anyone makes me squeamish, but it also made me sad because I could almost hear the disgust in her voice and immediately understood that kind of hateful sentiment that permeates black culture when it comes to hair. Also, she was like 14- I think. Sigh.

I’ve been wearing my hair natural my entire life and have been subjected to all sorts of criticism, but in this new age of #blackgirlmagic and the warm embrace of and enthusiasm behind black hair care, I thought I would have a safe space at this event that was suppose to be celebrating blackness. Though, that may have been the case, not everyone is onboard with the ‘fro, and that’s okay- I guess. The only thing is to make sure the reason behind not wanting or liking afros is coming from a healthy place. Because, just look at it:

As I mentioned earlier, I think there was a part of me that was so hesitant to rock a ‘fro because of the prejudice associated with it, and I didn’t want to be ‘categorized.' I know. I know. It took a long time for me to recognize and accept those feelings. It’s so frustrating because it was like I knew better, but couldn’t shake these strange sensitivities. I’ve come to terms with the fact that the healing within the community is going to take a lot longer than a few years of insightful speeches, ‘woke’ celebrities, and social movements. The kind of damage that’s been done is so much deeper than hair and so much more than just putting more black people in TV shows and films. My ancestors were completely stripped of their humanity and told they didn’t deserve, well, anything. Nothing. They didn’t even deserve to be themselves. So, of course that kind of psychological trauma that has manifested and evolved in countless ways not only within the black community but in society as a whole is going to take some time to mend. We’re on the right track though, finally, but whew. It’s gonna be a while. In the meantime, I’ll be over here rockin my ‘fro.

[scarlettrobot]

It's raining. #tags #graffitiart #graffiti #art #streetart #bushwick #brooklyn #rain

[scarlettrobot]

#streetart #art #graffiti #graffitiart #nyc #flatiron #wandering #manhattan

[scarlettrobot]

Is It Over Yet?

It hasn’t even been a month- think about that for a minute. IT HASN’T EVEN BEEN A MONTH, and the scandal of this administration continues to exhaust and infuriate the public at all new levels EVERYDAY. Logging into Twitter, biting your nails, timidly glancing at the screen to read the ‘very smart’ new message the POTUS has so graciously blessed us with on his personal account and then inevitably deflate into a pile of sadness and doubt at his pettiness. 

We’re living in a world of alternative facts and chosen realities, so it’s hard to really make sense of anything or even have civilized conversations when your sources of information are referred to as ‘fake news.’ I mean, the president is taking time out of his day to chastise the very entities that are for the most part just doing their job, which brings me to the circus that was a press conference yesterday.

Seeing how he presented himself was not only disheartening, but embarrassing. Having a political figure behave like a child, insulting reporters and their stations on live television was like watching an absurdist play, but IT WAS REAL. His blatant disregard for minor courtesy is not the only thing one of the many things that truly bothers me. The way he handles questions about the country’s seemingly growing divide is devastating. He basically said that all of these racist provocations are a result of the left perpetuating these attacks in his name, when we all know these people who are drawing swastikas and yelling obscenities at POC are all too real and feeling embolden by President (I shudder writing that) Trump’s lack of acknowledgement or care really for the spiteful language he uses DAILY.

Not to mention the way he spoke to April Ryan, a White House correspondent for American Urban Radio Networks, when she asked if he made any plans to involve the Black Caucus in his decision-making for his plan on developing inner cities. He proceeded to ask her if she knew them and if she wanted to set up a meeting, and she responded, “No, I’m just a reporter,” instead of a more apropos, “You’re an incompetent racist, bigoted fool, of course I can’t set up that meeting. Contrary to your belief, not all of us black people know each other you piece of sh*t.” In case you missed this incredibly uncomfortably exchange, you can watch it on one of the few networks that have not been accused of reporting ‘fake news.’ Here’s a piece ABC did on this unbelievable interaction. Brace yourself.

Back to President (*faints on keyboard, wakes up*) Trump’s provocative dismissal of responsibility for his ‘fans.’ It’s reminiscent of the way some white people fear or deny that racism exists, so instead of confronting reality, they push the blame elsewhere and/or get defensive. The way he handled that question about the uptick of anti-semitic crime (take a look here if you dare) from Jake Turx, a Jewish reporter with Ami Magazine was exactly that. He even told the reporter to ‘sit down,’ and called him a ‘liar!’ That’s right, folks, we’re dealing with someone so completely unhinged that he cannot face the fact that even though this country has been divided for years, it’s his direct election to power that has tipped the tension into the direction of active violence. Instead of being self reflective and understanding of the fear that anyone who isn’t a rich anglo-saxon male might harbor is real, he rails against the reporter as if the reporter is the enemy and offers absolutely no solace or solution for these violent acts, confirming, to everyone’s terror, that he is willfully out of touch. Can you call him blissfully ignorant? I can’t imagine blissful being used to describe him in any way.

I remember hearing or reading something about the kinds of qualities necessary to make a successful or at least effective president, and one of the traits is self-awareness, which President (*rolls around, spins in circles, sits back down*) Trump severely lacks. I don’t know if he’s aware anyone else is around him really. I imagine all he sees when he closes his eyes is himself, not even darkness. 

The way he refuses to address the division in constructive ways, whines about ‘hard questions,’ blames the media for his mistakes is terrifying to think about when you know he has access to nuclear codes and doesn’t seem to think anything he does is wrong. Troubling doesn’t even begin to describe his actions. We need to ban together more than ever to stop the insanity. I just. I just hope we can.

[scarlettrobot]

No More Hiding

Over the last week, while not in a comatose state or gliding through the day encompassed in a cloud of disappointment and silent rage, I began to obsessively scroll through Twitter. 

At first, it was a way to feel good about the massive amounts of people who were just as pissed as I was and voicing their collective disdain for the president. Then I began to parse through replies that were, plainly, devoid of logic. As I mentioned in an earlier post and more recently, I’m at a loss of how so much of this nation can be blinded by someone who’s entire campaign has been nothing but an unapologetic attack on people of color, LGBTQ communities, women, and really anyone who isn’t rich. His executive orders reflect this alarming dismissal of humanity and what I was hoping would be a four year stint of hotheaded talk and no action is starting to look like an impending, inevitable hellscape. I should rephrase that, I was never really at a loss, because that’s just naive. I’m more appalled and overwhelmingly frustrated.

The upside is there has been so much unity as a result of this common fury spawned by an unwieldy emotionally disturbed, leathery man-child, but there’s also been an intense, palpable division of the people who voted for Trump and those who didn’t. I’m starting to think this separation is not necessarily a bad thing, but something to be considered as we move forward as a country and figure out ways to heal the gaping wound this celebrity villain has exacerbated. 

I, for one, would like to know how this can happen. Healing. I’ve written about it before - this seething hatred or prejudice or what have you that prevents the acceptance of reality and promotes the belief in “alternative facts” and justifies shiftlessly falling behind grandstanding human dumpster fires. It’s either this, or other individuals simply don’t care about anything except the bottom line, so their allegiance to the country won’t go beyond their pockets. How do we get these obdurate and uncompromising rednecks people to see that what this man is doing is not only hurting every American, including themselves, but can potentially (and has already) hurt the rest of the world? It enrages me how stubborn people are. Not to mention exhausting to see these arguments defending this pool of orange bile.

Which brings me back to the glaring division, that may not necessarily be a bad thing. I mean, opposition is how we got to this place of mobilizing and organizing against the dark lord enemy administration. And it does add fuel to the fire when you see positively outrageous actions and claims made by the LEADER OF THE FREE WORLD. I dunno, something like possibly launching an investigation into “all the illegal votes” that must’ve been cast, since the Orange Wonder didn’t win the popular vote, or, I dunno, talking about the inaugural crowds in front of a CIA memorial and just weeks before comparing them to Nazis. 

It is no mistake that we’re living under unprecedented rule and every day has the potential to be been more heinous than the last and this division is causing tension, but in the grand scheme, it’s also helping sculpt our future (if there even is going to be one at this point), in a way that hasn’t been done in a very long time. More than ever, citizens are becoming involved with the political process and the dream the forefathers had for the US is coming into fruition (kind of- ya know, cuz most of them were slave owners and mega racist). The division is what’s making people pick up phones, donate money to great causes, and volunteer for amazing organizations. No one is letting anything dubious Tiny Hands does go unchecked. Our society is slowly but surely becoming more “woke.”

My only real worry about the division in this country is on a more granular level, in friendships and families, among classmates and coworkers. The division gets uncomfortable and hard to maneuver when in such close proximities. Obviously, people aren’t so uncivilized they can’t share a space with someone who has completely different views than the other, but seeing your coworker casually peruse Breitbart or mention their excitement for the Cheeto’s “next big decision” can be downright tough or ya know, the opposite. I have no idea what annoys the other side besides facts and logic. Hm, probably me saying that. 

So even if Timmy-talkative the co-worker and crazy-Aunt Jane are baffling loyal Trump supporters, the majority of the country is on your side. Proud, self-proclaimed 'deplorables,' and others continuing to avidly support this scary regime help everyone else identify those who won’t fight for the freedom of their countrymen and would gladly step on the backs of their neighbors for a little bit of prosperity. It’s good to know. There’s no more hiding. 

**Note** I posted this a few days ago, but thought it was a little too harsh. Then the next few days happened and now IDGAF. Plus, it’s Black History Month, so I’m not going to silence myself to make people comfortable. Even though I have very strong feelings about this 'celebration,’ as I feel it’s a direct insult to my culture and heritage because black history is and forever will be apart of American history, it’s still important to remember all of the people who came before me and refused to be silent or compromise their ideals for a society that continues to be unjust to POC.

[scarlettrobot]

Not sure which collective did this, but I really like it.

[scarlettrobot]

Help Me Understand

It has been 70 days since the most depressing presidential election I’ve ever experienced and there has been no reprieve from the glaringly unstable president elect’s ability to frighten and disappoint on a large scale.

As his inauguration quickly approaches to the utter surprise and disgust of most of the country, people are continuing to battle for their voice and remain angry in protest to, frankly, TRY to stand up against a lying racist no, def racist, fascist narcissist that is relentlessly threatening our freedoms. In all of this, he still has a vicious staunch following that believe his lies so wholeheartedly that any hint of dissension unleashes a reign of despicable fury, a litany of personal insults that makes you question whether or not this aggression is coming from something deeper than a desire to defend an ideal, but is really a culmination of compounded hatred and blind selfishness that leads to the hapless belief in policies in direct opposition to their own interests. Not to mention these assaults are usually led by the president elect.

I listened to a podcast today, (shout out to Pod Save America!) and was able to (kind of) understand where some of this frustration comes from. There can be an air of superiority that liberals have when it comes to discussing conservatives that can be off-putting and stratifying. Calling Trump supporters classless and stupid are not great ways to garner traction to change minds, but then again, I guess that’s not really the point at this juncture. The right has alarmingly made up its mind to house and support white supremacy, and ignore the plea of thousands to rethink disrupting Obamacare- just to name a few indiscretions. At this point, the priority is to protect the republic and defend ourselves from the inevitable onslaught of bigotry that is going to find its way into law. A vast majority of the country has made it abundantly clear that we will not walk quietly into the night, while this incoming administration attempts to steamroll, crush, and diminish our rights.

There’s just a piece of me that wants to believe people can change. In the right context, under the right circumstances, truth can prevail against a despot. Alas, this election has chipped away at that hope and I am resigned to believe no amount of fact or the witness of actual events will change the minds of the white America that is so wrapped up in an identity that is based on ostracizing and belittling “The Other” while turning a blind eye to an emerging government that cares nothing to little about democracy (or their wellbeing) and everything about money. 

To those people who will seemingly never see the dark side of this presidency: 

How can you so intensely follow someone who wants to MAGA for the upper class no matter the cost to the rest of the American people? Why can’t you see you’re being duped?

[thickdumplingskin]

SOME OF MY BEST FRIENDS ARE WHITE

SOME OF MY BEST FRIENDS ARE WHITE by Beau Sia

you’re not responsible for the other white people.

i see you sharing

black lives matter! dope post!

i see you marching

on instagram! dope post!

i see you donating

to THE cause. dope post!

your cousin in mountain view,

your best friend from college,

your aunt on your dad’s side.

NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY!

what his fascination with asian bodies got to do with you???

what her view on black men in the club got to do with you???

what auntie say about towelheads got to do with you???

you got bills, career instability, failed romance, a painful relationship with your father, global fear, comparison judgment, and the new season of favorite tv show on your plate,

what more can be asked of you?

you already have a puerto rican friend,

you already teach kids who’s future assignment is prison,

you already passed 2010’s ally exam.

i get it. there’s just not enough time for anything more.

besides,

it’s not your responsibility.

and anyway, we know how hard you try.

we’re all trying so hard, i know.

we are all frauds & failures & fucking wack

in the eyes of those who condemn us

to the color of our skin.

we let ourselves be agents of hate,

as if the power of our silence at thanksgiving,

in the boardroom,

amongst shared ethnic background,

will evolve from within

what silence has yet to evolve

in anything.

II.

i thought i could click like my way to evolution.

i thought revolution was proven on the internet.

i thought my face excused me from others’ struggle.

i thought example would magically transform all i touched.

i thought writing the poem was the most i needed to do.

i thought all the world’s problems separated by borders.

i thought responsibility was only what i did for myself.

you are not responsible for

the other asian people.

the aunt who still clutches her purse to acknowledge black.

the best friend from college whose best friends are now all white.

the cousin fucking his hate into the poorest nations on earth.

you are not responsible for

the other asian people.

you can talk your way out of any wrongdoing.

you can make believers out of anyone.

you can present like corporate long game.

you are only responsible

for who you are.

III.

you’re not a coward.

you been living

in a reward system

that erases

us all.

when we gonna challenge the roles we been assigned?

when we gonna challenge the comfort of our peers?

when we gonna challenge the traditions of our past?

when we gonna challenge the way our daily ignores color?

when we gonna challenge the narratives of war?

when we gonna challenge the truth of ongoing slavery?

when we gonna challenge the fear of facing our own hate?

when we gonna challenge the people against humanity?

when we gonna challenge the 8 men who rule over everyone?

when we gonna challenge the how that keeps failing truth?

when we gonna challenge the world made by our choices?

don’t worry,

making buzzfeed rich

is probably enough.

don’t worry,

becoming my friend

is probably enough.

don’t worry,

sharing this

is probably enough.

i mean,

what else can you do?

you’re not responsible

for the other white people.

you’re only responsible

for who you are.

and who knows

where you at

in understanding

that truth.

and who knows

whether this is something

you listen to

or become

defensive about.

and who knows

their responsibility

waking

into the reality

we’ve lived

the shared lie

that

we only have

as much power as

the masters give us.

you’re not responsible

for the other white people.

keep saying it

until all the mirrors die.

until there’s nothing left

of us.

This poem by Beau Sia has been removed by Facebook twice for “not meeting"community standards.“  We don’t believe Beau should be censored, and encourage you to share.

[scarlettrobot]

❤️