me in hell waiting for all my friends to die
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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祝日 / Permanent Vacation

Discoholic 🪩
Keni
we're not kids anymore.

Kaledo Art
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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JBB: An Artblog!

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blake kathryn

seen from Poland

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@schizophrenic-3791
me in hell waiting for all my friends to die
YES.
I once saw someone point out something I hadn’t really considered before- libraries are one of the only places that are warm and dry where you can stay for long periods of time if you have no money. If you’re someone with nowhere to go during the daytime, they provide a safe environment in which to keep a roof over your head for a while- and all while you can access information.
So yes. This.
It’s weird…libraries almost feel /wrong/ now. It’s like I walk in and think “This is great…where do I put my money?”
I used to work on a campus library and if you want someplace to put your money, so to speak, make sure you put books back in the designated areas. I know you think you’re being helpful by reshelving, but even if you pull something out to read a couple paragraphs just stick it in the basket for things you didn’t want. I don’t care if you know EXACTLY where you are. In academic libraries (at least in Texas) our funding was determined by how many books people looked at. So we got additional funding based on books not being reshelved. If there’s a designated shelf/basket for things you don’t want, stick things in it!
What @standbyyourmantis said about not reshelving is true for public libraries, too. Our funding is dictated largely by how ‘used’ we are, so we scan all the items that are laying about as In House Use. That, tied with Reference Count and Door Counter numbers (we have to manually put in the time we take for references) to prove we’re providing a needed service. We also have to count the number of people who come for our programs, which not only helps funding but shows that the programming/services are needed, as well. So, basically, if you want to feel like you’re making sure we’re getting paid and staying around, keep these in mind.
I didn’t know that’s why you’re not supposed to reshelf!
Wow! That’s astounding!
LIBRARIES!!!
I’ve lost how many times I get asked about how much it costs to get a library card. It’s free. Everything is free unless it’s late or you lose an item. Free. Free. Free. Free.
This is not going to be a fun post. If you are sensitive to graphic descriptions of violence and rape, here is your warning. Also a warning for suicide and self harm mentions.
I know I am probably going to get hate for this post, but I honestly really don’t care. The porn industry is horribly messed up, and the thought of people continuing to watch pornographic videos of girls being assaulted makes me pretty pissed off. I know people are going to argue, “oh, but it’s consensual. The women WANT to be there,” and I could go on about how that’s just blatantly incorrect, but instead, here are some testimonies of a few women who were/are in the porn industry:
EVA ANGELINA: “My pussy was so swollen, it was unbelievable. And the next day, I was obligated to work for Cherry Boxxx. And that f—ed me up even more. Working three scenes after having been so injured f—– me up. For a good six months, I wasn’t normal. My pussy wasn’t normal until a couple of months ago. It just sucks.”
MICHELLE AVANTI “Some of my experiences on the porn set include me being totally wasted and porn producers allowed me to be and even provided alcohol and drugs for me. I experienced rough sex scenes and have been hit by male talent and told them to stop but they wouldn’t stop until I started to cry and ruined the scene. During one specific scene called “Bukkake” I was really high and the producers knew it and they told me to use a Douche to pretend I was urinating on another performer but I had an accident and instead I defecated on the performer. I was so humiliated and wanted to die. They told me it was okay and not to worry that they weren’t going to make a big deal about it and the next thing I know they blasted the scene all over the web. I felt totally degraded.”
MAHLIA MILIAN “My worst day was when I was forced to use a sponge to do a scene because it was already booked and my monthly came early I had never did anything like this. The sponge was pushed so far and got stuck that I had to be taken into the hospital because I had caught a infection and they had to open me up to remove the sponge. I wasn’t able to work for a few weeks and the agent stole two of my checks to replace the money he didn’t get from me leaving me broke and without food.”
EMILY EVE “I shot scenes where I had to pretend to be dead and let someone rape my dead body. I came home bruised and sometimes a little bloody from the rough scenes. I shot deep throat scenes where they slapped me and spit on me and called me horrible things. I threw up, and had to keep shooting.. I couldn’t breathe because of the vomit in my nose and the genitals in my mouth.”
REGAN STARR “I got the shit kicked out of me… most of the girls start crying because they’re hurting so bad… I couldn’t breathe. I was being hit and choked. I was really upset and they didn’t stop. They kept filming. [I asked them to turn the camera off] and they kept going.“
CORINA TAYLOR “When I arrived to the set I expected to do a vaginal girl boy scene. But during the scene with a male porn star, he forced himself anally into me and would not stop. I yelled at him to stop and screamed ‘No’ over and over but he would not stop. The pain became too much and I was in shock and my body went limp.”
JERSEY JAXIN “Guys punching you in the face. You have semen from many guys all over your face, in your eyes. You get ripped. Your insides can come out of you. It’s never ending.” - Jersey Jaxin
ELIZABETH ROLLINGS “I didn’t want to feel the pain of penetration from an over average sized man, being told to freeze in a position until the camera man was happy with his shots was very painful. I had peoples body fluids forced on my face or anywhere else the producer pleased and I had to accept it or else no pay. Sometimes you would get to a gig and the producer would change what the scene was supposed to be to something more intense and again if you didn’t like it, too bad, you did it or no pay.”
GENEVIEVE “I had bodily fluids all over my face that had to stay on my face for ten minutes. The abuse and degradation was rough. I sweated and was in deep pain. On top of the horrifying experience, my whole body ached, and I was irritable the whole day. The director didn’t really care how I felt; he only wanted to finish the video.”
JENNA JAMESON “Most girls get their first experience in gonzo films – in which they’re taken to a crappy studio apartment in Mission Hills and penetrated in every hole possible by some abusive asshole who thinks her name is Bitch. And these girls, some of whom have the potential to become major stars in the industry, go home afterward and pledge never to do it again because it was such a terrible experience.”
ROXY “After only 30 movies I caught two sexually transmitted diseases. Herpes, a non-curable disease and HPV, which led to cervical cancer where I had to have half of my cervix removed. Porn destroyed my life.”
DANIELLE WILLIAMS “A female porm star that’d been in the industry for a while had excessive anal intercourse and a piece of her muscle from her anus fell out on set while she was filming. Some females damaged their reproductive systems which left them unable to have children. A male porn star broke the muscle in his penis because he was having abnormal and outragous rough sex. I found that a male porn star who was in the business for a while was a devil worshipper. Both male and female porn stars were committing suicide. A lot of the porn stars were known to go overseas and do beastiality in porn. (Sleeping with animals.) Shortly after that, a numerous amount of people starting turning up with diseases, Herpes to be exact.”
ALEX DEVINE “Donkey Punch was the most brutal, depressing, scary scene that I have ever done. I have tried to block it out from my memory due to the severe abuse I recieved during the filming. The guy, Steve French has a natural hatred towards women in the sense that he has always been known to be more brutal than EVER needed. I agreed to do the scene thinking it was less beating, except the ‘punch’ in the head. If you noticed, steve had worn his solid gold ring the entire time, and continued to punch me with it. I actually stopped the scene while it was being filmed because I was in too much pain.”
JESSI SUMMERS “I did gonzo porn to start out and it was the most degrading, embarrassing, horrible thing ever! I had to shoot an interactive DVD which takes hours and hours of shooting time with a 104 degree fever! I was crying and wanted to leave but my agent wouldn’t let me he said he couldn’t let me flake on it. I also did a scene where I was put with male talent that was on my no list. I wanted to please them so I did it. He put his foot on my head and stepped on it while he was doing me from behind. I freaked out and started balling; they stopped filming and sent me home with reduced pay since they got some shot but not the whole scene.”
ERICA CAMPBELL “Being in the world of adult modeling I see A LOT of pain….A LOT of heart break. SO many lost girls get into this business just for some extra money….to help pay for school….to help support themselves or even their children as single moms. “It’s just temporary”. They are only going to do this for a while…just a few shoots. I too started out to make some extra money to help me finish school. Almost ALL of the time It doesn’t end where you think it will…..the path goes on……the hole gets deeper….and the road gets darker. MOST of the time the girls don’t even realize it. One day you see this bright beautiful girl shooting tame nudes…the next they are signing on the dotted line of a hard-core porn company. Lost. Broken. Alone.“
CRISSY MORAN “I went through more heartbreaks and became suicidal. I was taken to the hospital for panic attacks. I tried to overdose on xanax, strangle myself, and cut my wrists but not nearly deep enough. I was too scared of the pain. I prayed God would just take me away! I felt helpless. I even went to church for a few months but the guilt I felt was overwhelming that I would feel as if I were choking when I was at church. I had to choose and once again I chose to continue sinning. It was easier and I needed the money.”
TIANA LYNN “I tried porn a year-and-a-half ago for three weeks. They [my agent DK] booked me for everything I didn’t want to do. I was in the hospital three times. Allergic to lube. Being pounded too hard. My cervix closed up. My ass got torn up.”
ERIN MOORE “Over the course of my porn career I have been belittled and treated like a piece of trash more than I could have ever imagined in a lifetime I would. I wasn’t a woman in any of these directors eyes, I was nothing to them. The male talent at times were nice, but sometimes, they were horrible. I’ve had men choke me, slap me, thrust me so hard until I couldn’t walk and this would happen even after I would tell them to stop. They have no respect for women.”
Can we stop pretending that what goes on in porn is fake? That the women in the scenes are happy to be there? That it’s consensual? Can we stop pretending now?
I’m pretty sure nobody is going around pretending that all sex workplaces are amazing and nobody is ever mistreated. There’s no career on earth that allows for that - no place at all really. Some people are just abusive and some people are more easily victimized than others, so they attract the abusers like a firefly to light. It’s just when people make widespread generalizations that’s the problem - not even close to all women are being abused in the porn industry. To say so is actually incredibly rude and offensive to the women who do choose to be there and who do like their work. It takes away their agency and just paints them as victims - that’s not okay. That’s actually pretty gross.
Not to mention, why is it only women who are ever mentioned? What about gay porn? If all women are being abused in the porn industry then don’t you think the gay guys who bottom would be just as mistreated? Shouldn’t they be mentioned and cared about as well? Or is that just not as important?
That being said, it is a shame what allegedly happened to these women and if their accounts are true than I hope justice occurs, however it’s not even slightly okay to paint a whole industry as toxic and abusive like this. I don’t really say this a lot, but honestly it’s kind of misogynistic to paint all porn actresses as victims. There’s been a lot of accounts from porn actresses and ex-porn actresses who have nothing negative to say at all - hell, some are even downright positive. Don’t erase their agency and their experiences just because it fits your narrative. Don’t be that guy.
(All references to “you” are generalized - I’m in no way singling out anyone.)
i’m too tired to properly argue with sources and shit but i just gotta say….
you read all that and your ONLY reaction is “not all women are abused”? “some women want to be there”?
just a quick stat: 90% of the women in the porn industry want to leave but have no means to do so. and you’re really gonna take a huge dump on the NINETY PERCENT of women who are exploited against their wishes in order to protect that precious 10%?
i can’t believe that you read the accounts of these women who were horrifically abused and your first thought is to defend the fucking industry and question if these accounts are true. maybe you just don’t want to think about the fact that the women you jerk off to are being raped and physically abused, are addicted to drugs, are suffering from STD’s, and can’t leave the goddamn terrible industry because they won’t be able to support themselves?
“it’s kind of misogynistic to paint all porn actresses as victims” no, it’s not. because they are. i swear to god, why is rape, specifically rape against women the ONLY crime where people aren’t allowed to claim victimhood? face it bud: these women are being exploited. their bodies are being sold as commodities. would you say it’s ageist to say all child laborers were victims because some chose to work in order to support their families?
“don’t erase their agency and their experiences just because it fits your narrative. don’t be that guy.”
and in that moment, you had no idea, not a single FUCKING clue… that you were that guy. you heard the accounts of several women’s abuse in porn and shut your ears to it because it killed your buzz.
you need to take a long hard look at yourself.
The amount of ignorant #notallporn additions on this post is astonishing, especially after reading all of those testimonies. Ya’ll keep defending a horrible industry that treats women like objects that can be bought, fucked, abused and thrown away. Hope your conscience catches up with you some time soon.
“some people are more easily victimized than others, so they attract the abusers like a firefly to light” SHUT THE FUCK UP @the-defiant-pupil
THIS sort of shit is exactly what woke me up to the horrors of porn. I had wanted to be seen as a funfem!! Not one of those prudish, uptight women with the pursed lips!! Sex is good! Empowerment for all! It’s all about CHOICY CHOICES, AMIRITE?
Yeah, no. THIS is the reality.
lesbian blog
“This was an actual game played at circuses & carnivals, mostly in celebration of “INDEPENDENCE DAY”, all over America from the late 19th century well into the early 1940s. 3 balls cost them a dime to hit a grinning Black CHILD peeking through a platform painted to resemble an African jungle while the child’s head appeared through the open mouth of a crocodile. This is a part of our history that you will NEVER see in any textbook or any class. Get in tune my people, to be ignorant of the past is to be blinded going into the future…. “
I don’t even have the words. Absolutely vile.
Into the 1940s. This isn’t hundreds of years ago. This is your grandparents and great grandparents.
“Slavery happened so long ago why can’t you just move on ..” 😐😐😐😐
That's horrifying. 🤢
Here’s another “friendly” reminder that the LGBTQIA+ community is not a fucking pissing contest to see who suffers the most oppression. The only people who do not belong in the LGBTQIA community are heterosexual, hetero-romantic, cisgender people (as in, ticking all three categories).
You’re biromantic, asexual, cis? You’re in. Bisexual aro enby? Definitely in. Asexual, aromantic, intersex? STILL IN.
Our community is built on inclusion and love. Finding peace and comfort with each other when we can’t find it elsewhere.
Stop fucking gatekeeping. You look like an asshole. You don’t get to decide who can or cannot be part of the community. We are not some elite club, where each member must adhere to some standard of queerness.
It’s not a competition. Fucking stop acting like it.
Tbh if a post even suggests that reblogging is some sort of activist necessity I will ignore it on principal
every popular media depiction of a person on the schizophrenia spectrum paints them as incurably violent and cruel
This is because for people looking at me, people like me, we aren’t full people. We are delusions and hallucinations without the humanity that they see when they look at people without such a stigmatiZed diagnosis..
We are full people!!! We are real and full with faults and strengths and loves and hates. And it’s true that the violent schizo is gonna get more views and more fucking Facebook likes but honestly .. the people painting this picture of us are making it hard for us to present ourselves to the world as we are. As human beings……
I can’t believe it’s controversial to say you shouldn’t call yourself “schizophrenic” or talk about the demons in your head or use it as an “aesthetic” or whatever if you don’t experience psychosis or schizophrenia
Little psychosis things #21
When you feel like you’re faking everything because you had a good day or good moment.
got a moment?
find some time right now to look up from your screen 🏵🏵🏵
I’m a breathing corpse
please. please i am fucking begging you. just leave the house. go outside. see the world. look at nature. eat some grass. i dont care just. please. for gods sake. get off of tumblr.
One thing that always confused me about the statement “a woman is a person who identifies as a woman,” is that this definition would mean that if no people on earth identified as women, there simply would be no women anymore.
And yet even if that happened sexism would still exist 🤔