` it's wwhatevver it is. `

𓂃 alter blog ᵔ hx . hym 𐙚 sys ︵˖ autdhd 𓏲 ꜆ lyot ; @/guitar-ist ------ main ;; @lovvebytes

[searendezvvous]

　 　`　 CA: 　an　 wwith　 my　 empiricists　 wwand..

　 　 —　 i　 wwill　 servve　 as　 the　 righteous 　 hope . `　 ✧

　 　 　.﹒✦﹒the 　 Gates 　open 　 to 　reveal﹒✧﹒.

　 　.﹒✦﹒She 　, 　 who 　yearns 　 for 　 the 　Sea﹒✧﹒.

๋　` Gross 　,　 wwhat 　are 　you 　doin' 　along 　the 　shore ?　 ๋

　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　　　 ୨୧

　 　 　 she 　, 　hym 　, 　fang 　⛧ 　syshost 　, 　bpdhldr

　 　 　 　homestuck 　introj 　☆ 　main 　 @lovvebytes 　

　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　interests

　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 —　

　　　　homestuck　,　sth　,　bsd　,　spy x family　,　crk　,　

　　　　　　　　　smiling friends　,　scott pilgrim

　　　vast error　,　voidbound　,　vocaloid　,　 +¹² (ask 4 more)

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　dni　list　:

　　　　　　　　syscourse　(its　tiring)　,　radqueer　,　

　　　　　　　racists　,　lgbtqphobic　+　anti-intersex,

　　　　　　　　　　cronus　ampora　(on　edge　)　,　

　　　　　　　　more　will　be　added　if　needed

　　it 　probably 　looks 　better 　on 　computer 　sorry

[obscurix]

i’m sick of the ache in my chest that constantly tells me i will never be good enough.

[thermporia-deactivated20250914]

bioluminescent eri? mayhaps?

[goidmage-deactivated20241224]

[searendezvvous]

if somebody actually lovved you, theyd check on you right? if they truly cared they'd check on you?

wwhy havvent they said something yet? are they happy noww that im gone?

is my boyfriend actually happy im gone

[searendezvvous]

people wwho lovve you are supposed to check on you wwhen you decide randomly to avvoid them right. like that's a concerning sign right.

right?

unless they nevver cared from the start?

[givemeantypsychotics]

loving me is like watering a dead flower

[domutkniecie]

part 1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :DDDDDDDDDDDD

took me quite long to draw :// i guess i could've just made this a sketch but im too ambitious and then i'm like. why did i do this. but then im like. hell yeah i did this. but im kinda tired. lol.

[searendezvvous]

me after letting my impulse get the best of me and unfriending the twwo people i cant livve wwithout oh my gog u fuckdd up i fucked up so bad

[domutkniecie]

this joke would be better if sollux had bpd and not bipolar (another sketch before bed :3333 this time i plugged in my tablet :P)

[searendezvvous]

instagram wwants me to crash out (i am paranoid due to multiple posts)

[searendezvvous]

this is so funny

[eridandidnothingwrong]

its inoperable

[frillusions]

some personal research i did into trauma and dissociative disorders (specifically DID/OSDD/CDDs in general) to debunk endogenic misinformation. feel free to add into this, share it, whatever. i gathered this from various sources and also just… used my own experience (minimally, this is 99% research from sites focused on CDD research and scientific papers)

Pro/Neu endos will be blocked if you’re just gonna start arguments. present useful factual research if you want to prove your point.

Firstly, let’s discuss why the brain dissociates to begin with.

Everyone dissociates to some degree. Your body naturally uses dissociation to avoid severe damage to your psyche. However, when trauma is repeated and severe enough, sometimes dissociation becomes too intense. This intense dissociation at a young age causes the brain to not fully incorporate into one identity.

“But trauma isn’t a diagnostic requirement for CDDs!” well, yes, but actually no.

Trauma is not included under the diagnostic requirements for CDDs not because it isn’t a required factor, but because many patients do not remember or even know they have trauma. This can cause people to believe they are non-traumagenic when, in fact, their brain is just doing its job and hiding the trauma from them. Consider that C-PTSD is very closely related to and can even lead to a diagnosis of a CDD. Your brain doesn’t just decide to destroy its internal structure for fun. It does it as a defense mechanism.

Of course, not everyone with trauma or C-PTSD would develop a CDD, but they are very closely connected. Most research i’ve found backing up endogenic systems is from scientists who have been disgraced by the community for their falsely constructed evidence and poor research abilities.

If you truly believe you are an endogenic system, it is likely because your brain wants you to believe that. Your brain doesn’t want you to go searching around for trauma memories or other alters. It wants you to stay as far away from the trauma as possible. That applies to every system. Systems exist to hide trauma from you. You do have trauma. But you don’t know about it and that’s the whole point. You cannot just become a system without trauma.

[searendezvvous]

history class my beloathed

[holder-culture-is]

trauma holder culture is feeling really bad when you make it seem like you don't believe that your bf loves you .. because logically i know they do, but it's really nice to hear them promise me.

I get it ! It’s reassuring to hear someone promise they love you :3 being distrusting isn’t inherently a bad thing , especially with trauma disorders. (that being said, trust is something to be worked on! don’t stay skeptical all your life, just know you aren’t a bad person for not trusting easily) you deserve to love and to be loved <3

[bpdohwhatajoy]

“I care about you” and top 10 other tired lies