đź đ đŚđđđđ đđ ~ You've always known who Ellie Williams is, since you've started college. You've heard the whispers and ignored the warnings especially when you let her drag you to the bathroom during a crowded party, just because there has been something that you felt was hidden behind the armor she seems to constantly be wearing. That, only to watch her disappear for two weeks straight and come back with that same armor shielding her harder than ever. When the chance to finally get closer presents itself will you lie to keep holding onto the feeble hope sheâll take it off? And will Ellie finally let go of it?
đź đ¤đđđ đđđ˘đđĄ ~ 65.8 â for now.
đź đđđđĄđđđĄ đ¤đđđđđđđ ~ literature student!ellie x literature student!reader, modern!au, college!au, grief, mourning, parent loss, one-sided yearning, mental health struggles, smut, no comfort at times, ellie just probably needs a hug, friends with benefits trope, identity kept secret type of thing (???), lying, kinda popular!ellie but not for the right reasons, angst, OCs, reader will be described as feminine presenting, reader is very much a hopeless romantic, afab!reader, cis men and minors dni.
⤡ ăfirst loves come in different shapes. sometimes it's a person, sometimes it's just an old, vintage bookstore and the thousands of possibilities the mind can burrow inside and where fantasies take shape. something unattainable, too out of reach. unless hope and a heart too big keep on dreaming. ËËË
⤡ ă just a party you didn't even want to go to marks the beginning of your unravelling, mainly caused by the sudden disappearance of the person whose hands touched you so desperately. just a class you couldn't predict would've marked the beginning of a lie. ËËË
⤡ ă writing as someone you like pretending to be is not as easy as you thought it would be, despite the thrill it gives you. at least not when the sound your heart makes sings a completely different beat. maybe it's time to stop pretending in the words you write if you really want to know the shape of someone else's soul. ËËË
⤡ ă one chance to be alone, one to discover, to nurture that feeling, that need that's gnawing at you to just know, to untangle the secrets being held captive. a chance that you take without a second thought, no matter what the consequences will be. even if they'll bring you to start crafting the biggest lie you've ever said.ËËË
⤡ ădipping toes in the waters of a past that's brought so much hurt, guilt and resentment, an explanation of two weeks of absence and the possibility of something new that maybe it's not just in your head. ËËË
⤡ ă a moment finally granted to dig deeper under the surface, to be able to hold the key to a heart that's been for so long closed off from anything that could remotely speak of love. too bad fear resides exactly in the possibility of ellie's walls crumbling down. ËËË
can someone please recommend some period wlw fanfics???! victorian, regency, medieval, it doesn't matter but I NEED to read about forbidden love, yearnism, comphet, internalized homophobia, religious guilt, angst, or anything like that. or or or something like butch knight x femme princess please ANYTHING
âââSYNOPSIS: You expected your job at guitar center to be nothing more than ordinary . . . You are quickly proven wrong when a girl in your science classâEllieâmakes a trip to the instrument shop daily, trying to make her burning crush on you as subtle as possible.
âââNOTES: Yet another smau ^3^ I hope u guys enjoy this!!!!!!!!!
aphelion ⌠the point in orbit where a celestial object drifts farthest from its sun âś
â â ellie williams x female reader
As your grief starts to bleed through even the simplest tasks, a comet is slowly carving itâs brief, burning, signature across the dark sky. The only thing left in your life? A journey across America to see the comet and honor your brotherâs wishes, his car shop inevitably passed down to you due to his eternal rest, and a gap of love in your heart where he used to be. Oh, and his used-to-be best friendâcollege dropout, disappoint to her family, and strangely determined to fulfill her astronomer aspirationsâEllie Williams.
she smells like summer: sunscreen, sweat, weed and freshly cut grass that combine into something heady. you smell like panic: shared strawberries, cigarette smoke, sweet ice cream and secrets that crawl under your skin and find a home for themselves there. and yes, maybe you did bring this on yourself, but heyâ in your defence, the emails were never meant to be sent.
featuring accidentally-sent emails, slowburn romance, gold chains, soccer practices, shared joints, an inescapable santa barbara heatwave, a ferris wheel and a fake dating plot that won't stop thickening. don't forget your aftersun- this is a summer that'll leave a burn.
aka a hefty slowburn fake dating oneshot featuring soccer!ellie and shy fem!reader. college au. eventual smut.
she smells like summer: sunscreen, sweat, weed and freshly cut grass that combine into something heady. you smell like panic: shared strawberries, cigarette smoke, sweet ice cream and secrets that crawl under your skin and find a home for themselves there. and yes, maybe you did bring this on yourself, but heyâ in your defence, the emails were never meant to be sent.
featuring accidentally-sent emails, slowburn romance, gold chains, soccer practices, shared joints, an inescapable santa barbara heatwave, a ferris wheel and a fake dating plot that won't stop thickening. don't forget your aftersun- this is a summer that'll leave a burn.
aka a hefty slowburn fake dating oneshot featuring soccer!ellie and shy fem!reader. college au. eventual smut.
đSynopsis; After moving to a new state and transferring to a new college, Ellie Williams uses her charisma and charm around campus to push her "side hustle" further, she's always been good at separating romance and buyers, but how will she react when someone starts getting too deep into her stash, and too close to her heart?
đ¨Cw; heavy substance use & addiction, HEAVY angst, suicide/suicidal ideation & self harm mentions, overdosing, self destruction is a hobby here, eventual smut, dealer!Ellie x addict!reader breif Abby x reader, bittersweet ending, barely any fluff,
đ§Now playing; strung out(on you) playlist
Notes&tags; â ď¸ Disclaimer; I want to preference, as someone who is an addict, I have absolutely no intention of trying to romanticize addiction or any of the topics mentioned, this is purely for entertainment purposes, if you or anyone you know is struggling with addiction or suicidal ideation, help is always available, reach out to a loved one, call your local hot lines, it is never to late to get help or to get sober. Always test your stuff, please be safe. You are loved. And on that note, enjoy. @n0t-1t
Wc; 2.8k
Chapter 1; slingin dope.
As much as people hate to admit it, it really does start from weed.Â
By definition âGateway drug; a habit forming drug that, while itself is not addictive, may lead to the use of other addictive drugs.âÂ
You can say you won't touch other stuff, you can let yourself get comfortable with rolling a blunt between your fingers, and soon you'll find that a cigarette basically feels the same. Maybe you'll get bored of how it feels, the same old heavy hum in your body that starts to feel sluggish instead of relaxing, red eyes that once induced giggles now get covered up with eye drops. It gets boring fast. It's a slippery slope.
But buying happiness is a lot easier than trying to fake itÂ
âone, two, threeâŚ.â
Ellie mumbled under her breath, counting the bills, the rough paper flicking between her fingers. It becomes a rhythm rather quickly. A chime of a phone, the roar of her engine, quickly slipping whatever vice was on demand into her buyers hands, a protocol she had gotten used to. Don't ask questions, Don't get too personal, keep it at a distance, getting your fair share of highs is okay, but don't get too comfortable.Â
It's not ideal, being the campus drug dealer at 19 wouldn't make any father proud, but college is expensive and her scholarship will only cover so much.Â
âTwenty, twenty-one-â
A harsh few knocks spooks her out of her counting, she lets out a yelp of surprise, jolting her focus away from the bills. She waits quietly, furrowing her brows as she slides off the edge of her twin mattress, feet hitting the carpet floor of her dorm.Â
âYo?â
Ellie calls, suspicious. It was maybe 9 o'clock, so it wasn't exactly late, but who would be knocking on her dorm at almost curfew?Â
âIt's dina!â
A familiar voice chirps behind the wooden door, and Ellie lets out a deep breath.
âForever paranoid, I see.â
Dina hummed as Ellie turned the door handle and let her in, rolling her eyes as the women strode into her dorm with a level of comfort that was almost annoying.Â
âI have like, 6 felonies worth of shit in my dorm right now, I think I'm allowed to be paranoid."
Ellie said, going back to where she was sitting. Dina nodded, picking at her nails as she leaned on the edge of Ellie's desk.
âFair. Anyways,â Dina put her hands together, grinning as she spoke.Â
âAbby is hosting another party. You're coming.â
Ellie scoffed loudly, rolling her eyes and setting a stack of bills down. She scrunched her face and a frown slid down her face.
âUhm, no I'm not. I'm busy.â
âBullshit.â
âI am! I am seriously very busy..â
Ellie groaned and threw her hands up, shaking her head. She toyed with the old money, flicking the edge between her fingertips. Truthfully, she was not busy. Abby and her butted heads like idiots, and she did not want to go to another one of Abby's âepic parties.â It would be a waste of both her time, and her drugs.Â
âEllie, we need you!â
Dina whined, she tugged on the sleeve of Ellie's hoodie, shaking it with an exaggerated pout.Â
âPlease, you have good weed, and the party is gonna be a bust without you. Plus, you can make some money!â
Ellie clenched her jaw, grinding her teeth together with an exasperated look. She wished Dina was better at taking no for an answer, but Dina was about as stubborn as a brick wall.Â
âFuck, fine. You guys are bunch of fuckinâ feins..â
Ellie grumbled, shaking Dina off and sliding off the bed. Dina grinned, feeling accomplished in the fact she had managed to convince Ellie. Ellie pouted, curling her lip as she glanced out the window, which gave her a clear view of the campus.Â
âWhen is it?â
âLater tonight, around 9.â
Dina slid next to her, watching people walk across the brick pavement. She threw her hair in a quick bun as she continued to speak.Â
âshould be fun. It's at one of the frat houses, I'll text you the address.â
âGreatâŚI'm so excited.â
Dina scoffed and rolled her eyes at Ellie's lack of enthusiasm. She jabbed her elbow into Ellie's side, which earned a muffled groan from her.Â
âSuck it up. Maybe you'll finally get laid.â
Ellie groaned louder and shook her head, running a hair through her messy hair. She moved past Dina, the floors creaked under her feet as she climbed back onto her bed.Â
âHave you ever thought that maybe my abstinence is voluntary?â
ânope.â
Ellie sighed as Dina grabbed her phone, perking up and trotting her way to the door.
âI'll text you the address. You better show up, or I'm kicking your ass.â
Dina said, pointing a finger at Ellie and narrowing her eyes as she swung the door open, to which Ellie rolled her eyes and nodded.
âyeah yeahâŚill be there..â
She mumbled begrudgingly, eyebrows furrowed as she leaned against the wall.
A party was the last thing she wanted to go to, especially if Abby was the host. But she also didn't wanna deal with Dina's whining, so she decided to suck it up and go. Plus, maybe she could make some money, there would be plenty of people, and a frat party was nothing without drugs and booze.Â
.
.
.
The music was loud, almost obnoxious as she stepped inside. Her head spun as she walked with a practiced ease, she had been high enough times that she learned how to mask as sober. The living room was filled with people, some idiot jocks playing some beer games, while some were lounging on the couch.Â
Parties were definitely Ellie's scene, she loved the anonymity of it, loved how she could just let loose and have fun, she loved how easy parties were to deal at, alcohol made everyone less anxious, so naturally her stash was sold quicker. Ellie spends more nights partying than she does studying; the rule about âgetting your fair share of highs is okay, but don't get too comfortableâ is total bullshit, any dealer who doesn't shoot their own shit is selling laced drugs, Ellie knew this. She loved to party and that was obvious, but what she didn't like was Abby's parties.Â
Too many shirtless frats, not enough girls. They somehow were so loud, and always so wrong at the same time. It made Ellie's head ring, all they did was flex their biceps and play beer pong.Â
``they seriously need better music.`` Ellie groaned to herself, slowly making her way through the crowded house. She eventually found the kitchen, pouting her lip out as she looked at all the bottles; vodka, hard lemonades, nothing fancy. She settled on a lemonade, not wanting to get too wasted too quickly.Â
âThis place is a bust."
She murmured, pushing past some drunk girls. She was about to go hide in a bathroom when her hand was tugged back.Â
âEllie! There you are.â
Dina smiled, and Ellie hummed in response. Dina wore shorts and a tank top, her hair thrown in a messy bun. She threw herself at Ellie, hanging off her neck with a lazy smile. It was clear she had already had something to drink.Â
Ellie stiffened just a bit before she patted Dina's back softly before sliding out of her grip.
âYeah, I came..unfortunately.â
Ellie mumbled the last part quietly, running a hand through her messy hair, sweat beading at her forehead. Dina watches her preen, watches how she adjusts her clothes, fixes her hair, it's funny.Â
âAre you dealing tonight?â
Dina asks quietly, tilting her head and crossing her arms under her chest. Ellie slid her hands into her pockets, nodding silently.Â
âCould I perhaps steal some weed off you? I have cashâŚpretty please.â
Dina put her hands together in a pleading motion, a sly smile curved up on her cheeks. Ellie rolled her eyes but opened a small pouch she had, pulling out a sealed container of bud. She picked out a few, already knowing Dina's usual amount from countless times selling to her.Â
She wrapped it up, holding it to Dina between 2 fingers. Dina smiled brightly and gave her the cash, folding it up and sliding it to her. She gave Ellie a quick kiss on the cheek, something she always did.Â
âYou're amazing, thank you.â
Dina coo'd, and Ellie hummed, nodding as she watched Dina shove it in her pocket.Â
âYou say this every time.â
âBecause it's true!â
Dina was amazing at stroking her ego. Ellie went to take a sip of her drink, but it was empty. She hadn't even realized she had been drinking it this much. She frowned and crushed the can.Â
âIm gonna go get another drink.â
Ellie said, shuffling on her feet as she looked towards the kitchen.Â
âAlright. Find me later.â
Dina rolled on her heels, and Ellie nodded in response, already moving as soon as Dina finished her sentence.Â
She weaved her way through the crowd, the music blared, the base throbbed in her ears. She was in no mood to deal with people, but she needed cash.Â
Ellie looked through the bottles, grabbing a solo cup and pouring a chilled liquid into it.Â
âYou here alone?â
A sultry voice called out from behind her. Ellie groaned internally before glancing over her shoulder. A girl, whose hair was disheveled, the strap of her tank top hanging off her shoulder, waltzed closer to Ellie with a drunk grin. Ellie frowned, leaning on the edge of the counter.Â
âNah.â
She answered dryly, and the girl pouted.
âThats a shame. What's your name?â
Ellie sighed loudly, loudly enough for the girl to hopefully get the memo that Ellie was in no mood for flirting. She didn't.Â
âNone of your business..â
Ellie mumbled. The girl whined, getting uncomfortablely close. She leaned on Ellie, and Ellie shivered in response.Â
âDont be a prude!! Loosen up. I can help, if you need it-â
âFuck off, respectfully.â
Ellie shook her off, narrowing her eyes. The girl scoffed, and Ellie shuffled away, out of her reach.Â
âFine then, be like that.â
The girl crossed her arms, storming off. Ellie rubbed her eyes, she was this close to ripping someone's head off.Â
She quickly slid out of the kitchen, her head spinning and her vision blurred. She was so overwhelmed, and needed some quiet.Â
Her hand touched the doorknob to the bathroom, and as soon as she closed the door, it felt like she could breathe. Her shoulders relaxed and she closed her eyes as she sat down on the cold, closed lid of the toilet.Â
The air was lighter, the once annoying party music was muffled by the tile walls. She was definitely not high enough to be socializing.Â
Her fingers rolled the unlit joint, feeling the thin paper dance between her fingers. She moved to hold it between her lips, taking a lighter and flicking it alive. She puffed as she lit the end of the joint, and it blew to life, the end sizzling as smoke started to affectionately swim around her.Â
It had been maybe 10 minutes of silence, just Ellie and her joint, before the door to the bathroom opened. She hadn't even realized how foggy the bathroom had gotten until the person coughed a bit, and their voice made Ellie's red eyes flick up.Â
âJesus- shit, sorry..â
Another girl, though this one much more sober and polite.Â
âYou're fine.â
Ellie's voice came out rough and smoke worn, her eyelids heavy as she slowly looked the girl up and down. She looked nice, definitely shy. You stood awkwardly in the doorway, smoke swimming past you to the fresh air of the hallway.Â
Ellie lazily leaned back against the back of the toilet, one hand holding on her knee. She took a moment to study her; she was clean, her hands toyed with the hem of her jeans, she smelled fresh, not like weed or booze, but like expensive perfume and floral shampoo.Â
Definitely not the type Ellie usually talked to.Â
âYou gonna keep standing there staring,â
Ellie mumbled, taking a big drag before blowing it towards her teasingly.Â
âOr do you need something?â
Youl shifted nervously, letting out a breathy laugh.Â
âI need the mirror, if you don't mind..ill be quick.â
Ellie hummed at that, nodding as she shuffled away a bit, giving her enough room to come in and close the door, to which the mysterious girl did.Â
Ellie watched as her eyes flicked across her, and she chuckled at the way they fixated curiously on the burning blunt between her fingers. She noticed it immediately, how you seemed curious, unlike Ellie, who held it with a practiced ease.Â
âYou smoke?â
The question caught the girl off guard, blinking at Ellie. You shrugged, shyly looking away as you spoke softly.Â
âNot really.â
Ellie smirked at that, almost predatory.Â
âThats not a no.â
Ellie teased, she spread her legs, lounging back, almost intentionally making her presence known.Â
âYou gonna take it if i offer?â
Ellie said lowly, holding it out. You hesitated, clenching her jaw.Â
But, you took it.Â
You held it between your fingers, watching how it burned.Â
âI'll be honest, I've never..smoked before.â
Ellie chuckled at that, biting back a grin.Â
âOh? Well there's a first time for everything.â
Ellie stood up, moving to lean on the sink next to you.Â
âI'll teach you.â
Ellie took the blunt back, holding her hand up to show how to safely hold it.Â
âYou just gotta inhale. Inhale, breathe in after, blow out. Watch, it's simple. Pretty hard to fuck it up.â
 You nodded, blinking up at Ellie with your big eyes. Ellie stared just as hard as she took a drag, breathing in after and blowing it out in her direction. You gulped and took a deep breath as Ellie handed it back, your fingers brushing Ellie's as you mimicked how Ellie had held it before.Â
âBreathe in slow.â
Ellie watched as you put your lips where hers were just a second ago, your lipstick staining the paper as you took a big drag, inhaling after, opening your mouth to let the smoke flow out.
âAtta girl.â Ellie whispered, the quiet didn't last long before you coughed harshly, quickly handing it back to Ellie.Â
Ellie giggled, trying to stifle an actual laugh as she watched how your eyes watered and your cheeks went pink.Â
âThat tastes horrible..â
You mumbled, pouting her lip out. Ellie flicked the ash away and spoke.Â
âYeah, but the high is great.â
You hummed, jumping up and sitting on the edge of the sink counter.Â
âSo..do you have a name?â you asked softly, voice a little hoarse from coughing.Â
âEllie. You?â
When youl replied with her name, Ellie nodded, repeating it to herself as she twirled the joint between her fingers tips.Â
âI like it.â
âThanks.â
Ellie silently offered the joint back after taking a hit, and you took it, mumbling a quiet âthank youâ and taking a much smaller hit as you two talked.Â
âDo you come to parties often?â
You asked kindly, blowing the smoke out your nose as you watched Ellie.Â
âYeah, I sell this stuff so..bunch of dope fiends here.â
You giggled softly, and the sound made Ellie's stomach swirl. Somehow, it stroked her ego in a way she didn't know she liked. Maybe she was just high, but she felt warm.
âOh that's cool..how long have you been doing it?â
You seemed genuinely interested, and Ellie nodded.Â
âAbout a year,â
Ellie paused to take a hit, blowing out the smoke after.
Â
âThis seem like something you'd be interested in?â
Ellie asked, handing her the joint. You paused for a second, humming as you watched how it burned. You nodded, taking a small drag and holding it much more effectively than before.Â
âYeah, maybe. You'll have to teach me more but..â
Ellie smiled, biting her lip as she pulled out her phone, pulling up a new contact and sliding it over.Â
âI gotchu, I wouldn't just leave you hanging.â
Ellie watched as you typed your number in, adding your name and snapping a quick, cute picture of yourself as the icon.Â
âI want a drink.â
You said, sliding her phone back over to her. Ellie smiled coyly, flicking the burnt roach into the trash. She could tell you were high already, your unsteady movements, your red eyes, and the fact you seemed more shy now. It was cute.Â
âLet's go get you a drink then, hm?â
Ellie watched as you nodded and slid off the sink, your eyes red and glossy. Ellie set a hand on your waist as she opened the door and motioned you to leave the bathroom.
synopsis: growing up, you had the perfect life. the perfect family and the perfect future handed to you. you thought you had everything, but in the back of your mind, there was a hole that you couldnât quite fill. & when you get partnered up with a specific tattooed loser for a semester long project, your world seems to fall into place. little do you know, this specific tattooed loser had been plotting on you all along.
trigger warning (s): homophobic parents/childhood homophobia mentioned, the reader is closeted so there will be internalized homophobia, pretty âgraphicâ descriptions of sexual fantasies/sexual desires, dom!ellie (top!ellie) & sub!reader (bottom!reader), ellie is a yearner and the reader is slightly stuck up/obnoxious, explicit language, mentions of drugs (weed) & alcohol, & mentions of non consensual sexual activity. ( if i miss anything, iâll add it !! )
âĽď¸ table of contents
chapter one â the way you touch me ( wc : 4.6k )
chapter two â straight to the heart ( wc : 4.6k )
đŹđ˛đ§đ¨đŠđŹđ˘đŹ ⎠hereâs how it all started. how you met. why she bothered you so much. she knew how to get under your skin, even from the beginning. the obligations you were forced to carry, the fears that kept you up at night, she sensed it all. you hated the way she saw youâ through youâ like there was something else she was desperate to reach. you were now her very own passion project. and sheâd use that to her advantage.
đ°đ¨đŤđ đđ¨đŽđ§đ ⎠4.7k
đđ¨đ§đđđ§đđŹ ⎠ellie williams x reader, heatedrivalry!au, dual pov, ellie is two years older, brief backstories for context, deep family issues, joel is ellieâs dad, mental health issues, anxiety, insecurity, societal/personal pressures, unhealthy coping, heavy sexual tension, banter, rivalry, jealousy/envy, cigarette smoking, heavy language, flirting if you squint, ellieâs annoying as fuck, terrible depictions of a hockey game, downsides of fame, mentions of l/n (last name). proceed with caution.
You werenât the furious kind. Never a problem-child. As far as everyone knew, you were mute. Perfect. Polished. Not because it came naturally, or because itâs the way you were raised, but because you had to be. Failure was a luxury you couldnât afford. And with all eyes on you, youâd grown used to never coming close to it.
Hockey was important to your family. You knew that. Your father was a legend of his time, a top player, a name you had to live up to. You were certain there were more golden metals lined up across your living room walls than family photos. Youâd never questioned it, though. Never thought that, maybe, it wasnât normal to care more about public image than anything that might resemble love.
After your fatherâs injury during one of his games, the doctors had made it clear heâd never be able to play again. A life-long career heâd built with his own two hands, a team heâd captained and trained for years, gone within the blink of an eye. Forgotten once a clip of his brutal accident went viral.
Heâd been devastated. Mortified. Then, heâd made it his lifeâs mission to make you the next him. And after his long recovery, with a permanent limp to accompany his haunting memory, your father had forcefully tossed you into the world of hockey.
Cold, cruel, bitingâ hockey.
You were nothing short of seven years old with star-printed bandaids on your battered knees and missing front teeth. Your mother, forever too distant to argue, stayed quiet as your fatherâs passion became yours. Even still, youâd quickly learned that the only recognition that mattered was the kind followed by golden metals and article headlines.
If nobody remembered, it didnât happen.
Thatâs what your father always said.
As you grew into puberty, hockey became a second skin, a beating heart, a tough shell of equal protection from the world and from yourself. The cameras didnât matter so long as you got the goal. You were good at hockey. That meant something. When you were on the ice, gliding like you defied all the common laws of physics, you were sureâ for a momentâ that nothing else existed.
You were well aware that your father lived vicariously through you, nitpicking each move you made as though he couldnât fathom that your mind and flesh were singularly your own. His control bled into every aspect of you, blurring the lines between father and manager. His voice was a constant buzz in your ear, an endless reminder that nothing was ever enough. But you didnât have a say. You never did.
Now, captain of your team and one of the most trending, influential players in the world, you were burdened with the task of representing your family. Your name. Your fatherâs legacy. And although you were older now, and youâd be damned if you let anyone hold that same control over you, you knew that you still couldnât fail.
Winning was engraved in you.
Like you were a machine and your father was the inventor.
Coping was never your strong suit. You tried the breathing, the journaling, the top-notch therapiesâ all the stupid crap that people preached so much about. But the stress still gnawed, still twirled inside your gut. You were a ball of nerves with tensed shoulders and a tight jaw, because the truth is, fame didnât leave room for emotions.
Fame didnât comprehend you as anything other than a player number on the back of a jersey, or the replicant copy of an all-time hockey legend. No amount of fancy therapy could make you think any differently. No amount of medicine could outshine your dulled-out youth.
But hockey could.
And it did.
Because hockey made you focused.
It made you forget.
And that was far more productive than any emotion you couldâve possibly felt.
Ellie was sick and tired of everyone telling her what to do.
She didnât give a shit about brand deals, or fawning girls, or whatever bullshit the media had spewed out that week. Much less did she give a shit about what the world and all of its people thought of her. She just wanted to play hockey.
Wellâ play hockey and win.
The stick against the puck, the puck against the net, again and again in a continuous, constant rhythm. Sheâd memorized the sounds, learned to count the seconds as though she could anticipate the next move, the next goal. Adrenaline pumped through her veins like hockey was her drug of choice.
It made her feel alive.
Nothing had ever made her feel that way before.
Sheâd always been consumed by a strange sort of numbness. Not the kind that came from trauma or the act of blocking things out, but the kind that existed there regardless of any fact. The kind that remained. She didnât understand. She had a family that loved her. Friends that cared. For a long time, she had a girlfriend. But none of it felt right.
None of it felt real.
The pressure of winning was more sustainable. The anger it ignited, more physical. Hockey gave her a sense of control she desperately craved. It was a place where her anger could belong. The sweat building on her skin, the lack of breath coming in and out of her lungs, the game so rough she could drop dead on the iceâ it was the one thing she had a say in.
Control was all she needed.
It made her stop thinking about all the other things she couldnât change. How her father was the only parent she had. How heâd given her everything since the moment heâd taken her in, and now he was getting older, sicker, less able. How she felt like she owed him, but didnât know how to give back. How her friends had their lives figured out, in their 20âs already settling down, and she still had no idea what she wanted to do with her life other than play hockey.
Maybe she needed a different outlet. Maybe obsession wasnât the answer. Maybe control wasnât the purpose. She knew that. It was a truth she didnât want to admit, but a truth that ate her alive nonetheless. Her father had repeated it many times. He insisted that her impulse would be the thing to ruin her.
Maybe thatâs why, when she saw you on the ice for the first time, she felt this visceral need to know more.
You were an answer to some sort of unknown equation, a push to her endless pull. She felt a loose bolt in her head that only you could tighten. And it wasnât obsession that drew her in. Nor was it her infectious need for control.
It was strategy. Patience. Technique.
You were an uncontrollable force. An unpredictable entity.
And she was determined to figure you out.
December 2013
The weather this morning had seemingly decided that today wasnât your day. It was gloomy and grey, large clouds looming over you like some sort of warning. A terrible start to the most important day of your life, you thought. The game that would dictate much of your futureâ and whether or not your father would respect you as an adult player.
You were eighteen now. The youngest player on either team. The so-called ânepotism babyâ that the public either spat on or worshipped with little-to-no in between. Today was your chance to prove yourself. Sure, being your fatherâs daughter gave you undeniable opportunities. But getting up thereâ up to the very topâ youâd done that all on your own.
Your father had dialed you about twenty times this morning, to which you could only decline. The voicemails went on about how he wouldnât make it to your game, though you werenât exactly surprised. He hadnât gone to one of your games since middle school. Instead, he watched from the television in the comfort of his home, probably so he could yell at you freely through the screen. You were certain your mother watched too, only she never had much to say about anything.
As important as hockey was to them, they sure didnât seem to care enough to show up.
Your phone rang again. You felt it vibrate in your pocket, picking it out with a loud, annoyed sigh. You watched your breath escape into the cold air.
It was your father.
This time, you answered.
âGameâs about to start, Dad, I donât have time for this,â you spoke into the phone, hiding by the emergency exit at the back of the building like it could save you.
âWhy havenât you been answering my calls?â
âIâve been⌠busyâŚâ you lied through your teeth, squinting your eyes like the conversation hurt to entertain.
âAre you caught up with what the press is saying?â
âWhat? Noââ
âThey think Bostonâs got this in the bag. You gotta step it up, kid. Anticipate. Watch instead of do.â
You swallowed his words. Internalized them, nonetheless.
You didnât have it in you to argue. Not when he was mostly right. Not when youâd already spent most of your life trying to get him to understand.
âYep. Got it. Thanks.â
âJust⌠make me proud.â He paused. âYou know what to do.â
You closed your eyes, already feeling a headache form between your eyebrows. âYeah. I will, Dad,â you said, voice quieter than expected. âSay âhiâ to Mom for me, will you?â
And just like that, the call was over. You were left with nothing but the burdening silence of your racing thoughts and the chilly winter breeze. You held the phone up to your forehead like you half-expected it to ease some of your worry. But it was no use. You were a mess, and the day had barely begun.
You dragged out a breath.
Regulated yourself. Composed yourself.
You checked the time on the phone screen, still not quite ready to have your hockey skills broadcasted for the entire world to see. This was your first international game. Your first time close up on a big screen. Your first time hearing equal parts praise and hatred. With only a few minutes to spare before the big moment, you dug into the pocket of your jacket for a pack of cigarettes and a lighter youâd absentmindedly tossed in there earlier, silently grateful that you had.
You let the smoke reach the back of your throat and sneak its way into your lungs, exhaling slowly as the familiar scent of tobacco pooled your senses. You didnât smoke often enough for it to be considered a bad habit, but it was enough to be something you turned to when reality bit too hard.
âThat kinda morning, huh?â
You heard her before you saw her, the voice catching you completely off guard. Your head snapped to face herâ Ellie Williams. Bostonâs best player. Americaâs most talked-about celebrity at the moment, known for her cocky attitude, unmatched winning streak, and hot-headed temper.
She also happened to be your opponent.
America mightâve been wrong about many things, but Ellie Williams being a heartthrob wasnât one of them. She was even hotter in person. Her slim figure loomed over you, barely but noticeable, maybe more of a confidence thing than actual height. Her eyes were dark despite the awfully bright green of them, focused like she was already studying you.
You shook the thought away as quickly as itâd formed.
She pulled the grey beanie lower over her head, crossing her arms over her chest as her feet took deliberate steps towards you. She settled beside you, leaning on the wall like everything about her was fixed and casual.
âI donât think youâre supposed to smoke here, Golden Girl,â she teased, her voice low as she pointed up to the faded âno smokingâ sign pinned on the wall behind you.
You rolled your eyes. That damn nickname made you want to puke every time you heard it. âPlease donât call me that.â
You exhaled smoke into the air again, choosing to ignore her initial comment.
There, at your lack of regard, she cracked a smile. It was more of a smirk, you thought, but a smile nonetheless. You couldnât tell if she was mocking you or simply watching you, but, god, that look she gave you made you want to scream.
âIâm Ellie,â she quickly switched topics, extending her hand for you to shake.
Your eyes squinted, suspicion filling your being. âYeah, I know who you are.â You met her hand with yours, briefly shaking up and down. âAnd clearly you know who I am, soâŚâ
Ellie nodded slowly, her eyes never leaving you. âSoâŚâ she echoed, as if waiting for you to say the next word.
âSoâŚâ you repeated. âIâm gonna wish you good luck.â
She finally looked down at her shoes, sucking in a breath through her teeth. âI donât believe in luck.â She shrugged.
âWell, I do,â you insisted, your gaze never faltering, your tone never softening.
And she just looked at you. Memorized you with that same so-close-yet-so-far look. You didnât know what to make of it. Was she doing it on purpose? Was she trying to leave a mark?
You blinked, clearing your throat. âAnyway, I should probably get in there,â you mumbled, scratching the side of your nose just to give your hand something to do.
You took one last hit of your cigarette before dropping it to the ground. Then you turned, already walking away, prepared for the never-ending thrill of your upcoming game. But before you could make it too far, Ellie spoke again.
âYou wonât be so nice when we beat you,â she said, her tone still teasing like she wasnât letting up, still cocky like she wouldnât accept your unbothered response.
âKeep dreaming, Williams,â was your simple response as you continued your path straight ahead.
You smirked to yourself when she didnât say anything else.
The rest of the day, however, was an awful blur. And you were convinced Ellie Williams was a goddamn bad luck charm. The second you stepped foot on the ice, she was on you like gum stuck to the bottom of a shoe. She was quick. That, you could admit. And they werenât lying when they said she got under other playersâ skins. It mustâve been a tactic. A way for her to get into your mind and destroy your focus a little. Either way, she was getting to you. And you didnât like it one bit.
You shouldâve expected it, honestly. The aggravating messiness, the annoyingly perfect stealthiness, the way she moved with such ease and fluidity. For a moment, you caught yourself just observing her, watching her as she focused on the puck beneath her control. She didnât tremble, she didnât falter, she didnât even seem nervous at all. In that brief moment of weakness, you wondered what it might be like to live in her skin. To inhabit her mind. To take control of her hands, and her hips, and know what it felt like to be so free.
Then, before you knew it, youâd blinked back into reality. The puck slid across the ice in perfectly timed intervals, your eyes forcing themselves to chase it rather than her. Then, when the puck neared you just enough, her shoulder nudged roughly against yoursâ an act you were sure was so purposeful, so meticulously planned, that it made you angry. The impact made your body jerk.
âWhat the hell?!â Your arms extended on either side, shoulders raising in frustration as you glared at her.
If you werenât live on international television right now, you probably wouldâve shoved her right back. Except it didnât matter at all whether you did or didnât shove her, because the whole world had just seen that interaction. And they wouldnât forget it, to say the very least.
Ellie slowed in her tracks. âWatch where you skate, L/N.â She smirked again, her stick sweeping the puck away from you.
You wanted nothing more than to wipe that stupid smug look off her freckled face. When the game finally reached its end, and you were all sweaty and breathless and riled up, you were convinced she was the most annoying person on this planet.
Worst of all, not only did her presence make your blood boil, but she had actually beat you. Canada versus America. Montreal versus Boston. The game that you were so sure you could handle. She fucking won, just like sheâd said she would. And that pissed you off even more.
Both teams were now lined up for the post-game handshake. Your teammates had their spirits crushed, and as captain it was your duty to keep a good face, not just for them, or for you, but also for the press. For the fans. For the viewers at home. You couldnât show any ounce of weakness, especially not now that Ellie probably expected it.
That sore-loser mentality had no place in the hockey world.
Youâd learned that from your father, too.
A harmonious series of âgood gameâ flooded your ears as each player shook anotherâs hand. When it was Ellieâs turn to shake yours, she took it with a strange familiarity. With her helmet tucked under her arm and sweat dripping from her forehead, the wetness glistening in contrast to the white of the ice, she leaned in close to your ear.
âSee you at the draft,â she whispered, lingering momentarily, but only enough for you to catch it.
When she separated, you caught that same smirk.
And as she skated off, you did nothing but clench your jaw.
It was officialâ you hated Ellie Williams.
June 2014
You really didnât want to be here right now. Six excruciating months after your pitiful loss against Boston, and you still found it hard to show your face at any of these gatherings. It felt like all anyone ever wanted to talk about was how Ellie Williams had beat the daughter of the greatest hockey player in history. To put it simply, you were embarrassed. Not just that youâd lost, but that youâd been so sure youâd win.
It wasnât all bad, though. Youâd gotten drafted, and so had Ellie, which meant that you were both the brand new, talented faces of the major league. Despite the loss, youâd made it a step further into your hockey career. And itâs safe to say that it wasnât because of your fatherâs status, but the unforgettable image youâd already put out there for the whole world to see.
In those months following the game, you were sure youâd never seen your father so disappointed. What heâd said on those phone calls, you didnât even want to remember. The yelling, the insults, the scolding like you were still a little girl that needed to be disciplinedâ it made you feel lucky that, for the next few months, youâd be too busy traveling the country for hockey games and promos to see him.
So you sucked it up. Just for today. You let yourself forget your fatherâs words, let yourself destroy the weight of his anger towards your failure. You couldnât allow Ellie to get to you like that. And you wouldnâtâ youâd make sure of it. It just felt impossible when the mere thought of her made you want to rip the hair right off your scalp.
âWe donât care that she came in number two,â the man in the fine suit and tie said to your father. âMontreal is head over heels, especially with how young she is.â
Your father glanced your way to see if you were still listening.
The man spoke about you as if you werenât right in front of him. You did nothing but stand there and look pretty, just like your father said to do. Either way, you were too distracted to respond. Too preoccupied by the sight of Ellie standing on the staircase in that dark tuxedo, her dress shirt half-unbuttoned to expose parts of her collarbones, hands deep in her pockets like she was too cool to be anxious.
You blinked. Looked away before anyone could catch you.
âMany kiddos out there will see themselves in her. Thatâs important, these days,â the man continued, his hands swaying dramatically like his words held so much meaning.
âI completely agree,â your father chimed in, listening closely and intentlyâ or at least, pretending to.
You stayed quiet, still half-blinking like you were drifting in the spaces between here and somewhere else. Taking a sip of champagne, you found your mind wandering. Past summers, scheduled vacations, that lunch date youâd planned with your best friend and never followed through withâ anything to keep you from falling over the edge.
âShe seems to have a bright future ahead of her,â the fancy man in the suit continued, pulling you away from your distant, everlasting thoughts.
Your father nodded. âYeah, sheâs amazing,â he paused to look at you. âShe just needs discipline.â
You looked down at the champagne glass beneath your fingertips, unable to meet his eye.
âNothing a little PR training canât fix,â the man responded with an awkward chuckle, probably feeling the tension in the air.
You cleared your throat, then put on a smile. âI promise, I wonât disappoint.â
The man nodded once, convinced. âI have no doubt about that.â He grinned, looking at your father as if to tell him that he should be proud.
Instead of dwelling on your fatherâs lack of reaction, you looked up again. Maybe it was out of habit, or a simple, practiced mindlessness. Or maybe it was something more intentional. More visceral. Either way, you saw Ellie up there again, standing at the top of the stairs beside her father, nodding her head at every muffled word like she was paying close attention. It bothered you, how easily she blended in. How all this fame and fortune seemed built into her, like she didnât even have to try.
Having grown up in the limelight, this stuff shouldâve come naturally to you. The cameras, the interviews, the picture-perfect agendaâ it was your birthright. Your inheritance. You couldnât understand why the constant attention made your mind circle, why your palms felt drenched in sweat and your chest felt like it was compressing and collapsing in on itself.
The version of you that everyone else saw⌠that wasnât you.
It never was.
Maybe that sentiment was more suffocating than youâd thought. But it was the hefty price that came with following your dreams.
All of a sudden, you blinked. Your mind and body were one again. And then, you noticed her looking right at you. She had that same expression, like she was daring you, tempting you. She took a sip of champagne as she stared at you. She mumbled something in her fatherâs direction. You couldnât hear what it was, but she held out her champagne glass for him to grab. Then she looked at you again, her eyes a shakingly piercing green.
Her gaze didnât leave yours as she stepped into the womenâs restroom, disappearing from your line of sight.
Was she communicating something?
Was this another challenge? Another attempt at pressing your buttons and pushing you over the edge?
You cleared your throat, utterly conflicted.
You thought about staying put beside your father, letting their words muffle in your ears for yet another hour. But this feeling you had, it couldnât be ignored. This urge. This thrill.
âHey, Dad, Iâm gonna run to the restroom real quick. Iâll be back,â you whispered, handing him your champagne glass.
He nodded. Waved you off.
He didnât care enough to argue.
Your legs seemed to have a mind of their own, leading you to nowhere in particular. Part of you wanted to stop, to stay, to ignore whatever hold Ellie had over you. But the way her gaze had carried such power, the way her eyes sunk into youâ tore through youâ it was impossible to push away. And impossible to understand. A strange curiosity filled your being.
Before you knew it, you were entering the womenâs restroom, sucking in a breath like you were bracing yourself for some kind of disaster. And then, there she was, leaning against one of the porcelain sinks like sheâd been waiting for you. Her confidence baffled you.
âItâs been a hell of a day,â she said, awfully casual.
âYeah.â You let out a breath. âTwelve hours straight of âstand there and look pretty.ââ
She looked you up and down, as if taking in all the fancy clothes and expensive brands you had on, as if memorizing this very scene.
The moment felt heavy.
âIs that why you followed me here?â she asked, her head tilting to the side like she was desperate to get under your skin. Always teasing. âNeeded a break?â
Your face felt hot. âWhat? Noâ I wasnâtâ I didnât follow you.â You crossed your arms, defensive all of a sudden.
âHm,â she mumbled, probably not convinced.
She studied your body language like she was trying to dissect you. Like she was desperate to know what you were really thinking. What you hid underneath. You felt exposed. Raw. The vulnerability made your gut twitch.
Ellie sucked in a breath, then dropped her shoulders like she was letting down a wall. âI guess weâll be seeing each other more often now,â she said.
âYep.â You nodded, unable to muster up too many words. âMontreal and Boston. Destined to clash.â
She looked at you with that familiar mischievous grin. âBetter get used to it, Golden Girl.â
Your eyes narrowed, face stoic. âI told you not to call me that.â
She looked down at her shoes. âI dunno, I think itâs kinda fitting.â She looked up at you again, and you just knew that whatever she was about to say would piss you off. âYâknow, you being all perfect and proper all the time.â
âRight.â Your voice was monotone. Unimpressed. You let out a breath through your nose that resembled a scoff. âAnd now I know why they call you Bad Temper. You bashed your shoulder into me halfway through the damn game.â
Two could play at this game, you thought.
Instead of responding, Ellie just laughed. Truly, fully chuckled under her breath. She mustâve found you utterly amusing, and in a way, that bothered you more than any response. In a swift movement, she eased off the sink, slowly approaching you as her hands snuck into her pockets. Your eyes drew down to her tux, then back up once youâd realized youâd been looking.
She inched closer in brief, deliberate movements. Always careful, always stealthy. She always had tricks up her sleeve, and not just on the ice. With her eyes jabbing into yours, she placed herself in front of you, blocking the entrance. Now, you couldnât leave.
âYouâre still mad about that?â she asked, her voice low and menacing, brows curling like she couldnât believe it.
You huffed, crossing your arms harder over your chest like it would keep you stable. âIâm not mad.â
She smiled again. You caught a pair of dimplesâ one on either cheekâ then mentally scolded yourself for noticing such a thing. âRight,â she practically whispered.
You rolled your eyes, curiosity dying as another sort of heat began to wash over you. You swallowed the large lump in your throat, leaning over Ellieâs shoulder to reach for the door handle. But before you could escape through the threshold, her hand found your wrist.
âGood luck out there, L/N,â she murmured, low enough for only the two of you to hear. The sentiment shouldâve felt genuine, but her tone was ever playful.
You scoffed, full-on this time. âWhatever, Williams,â you said, fighting past the hold on your wrist and through the entrance.
Outside of the womenâs restroom, you were once again faced with the real world. Your father somewhere in the nearby distance, with other fancy people talking his fancy ear off. Your heart was thumping in your chest at an unnatural rhythm, a strange adrenaline consuming your system. You didnât know what the rest of the night would hold, nor what the future of your career would look like.
All you knew was that Ellie Williams was on the opposite team, not just on the ice, but everywhere else.
a/n : alright gays, what do we think?? i hope itâs not too obvious that i know nothing about hockey⌠let me know your thoughts!! and comment if youâd like to be tagged in the upcoming chapters.
likes, comments, and reblogs are greatly appreciated !
SYNOPSIS - everyone knows vi. how could they not? a jockâcaptain of the schoolâs softball teamâ notorious for gifting girls her varsity jacket, then mysteriously having it back on her shoulders a week later. a heartthrob. painfully attractive with a piercing icy blue gaze that burned with intensity and passion. so how are you supposed to act when the Violet Lanes sets her eyes on you, a shy, quiet nerd in her fourth period ELA?
you & ellie take tabs chocolate, and fuck around like bunnies.
warnings: fem!reader, tabs chocolate, pwp, established relationship, thigh riding, praise kink, drooling, manhandling, kissing, biting, desperate sub top!ellie, sub bottom!reader, several rounds, strap, bulging
word count: 1.4k words
read on archive.
join my discord server.
âRemember weâre gonna go just to get bread,â Ellie said, putting her jacket on, âthat also cause I canât survive without grilled cheese.â
âYeah, I know.â
You checked your outfit for the seventh time that morning, before picking up your car keys but the moment you did, Ellie swatted them out of your hand. You blinked at her, confused.
âWhat?â
âYou ainât ever drivinâ when Iâm here,â Ellie wrapped one arm around your waist, âjust be my pretty passenger princess.â
âYouâre too much.â You giggled but you were blushing.
âYou love it.â
âDamn right, I do.â
You both walked out of the house. You turned to lock the door and Ellie went to rev the car out of the parking lot. Once she did, she opened the car door for you. You got in, she closed it and returned to the driversâ side.
âWeâve never really been grocery shopping so early before.â
âWell, technically weâre not grocery shopping⌠just bread.â
âJust bread, got it.â
Yeah, well you knew Ellie wouldnât ever settle for âjust breadâ.
If she saw the apple juice she loved so much, she would give you puppy eyes til you put it in the basket and bought it despite what you both agreed on back at home. Those were just the little things that bonded you and Ellie.
She parked once you both reached, and before you could reach for the doorâ she jogged on to the other side and opened it.
âCome on, princess.â
You rolled your eyes affectionately, âyouâre such a show off.â
âGotta treat my babygirl right.â
You smacked her playfully, âgo fetch bread.â
âMânot a dog.â Ellie huffed.
You raised a brow and gave her the look.
Yeah, she remembered the collar and leash in the bedroom. With a groan, she walked ahead into the store anyway. You laughed softly and followed her in. As you looked at the dates on the back of the bread to make sure itâs fresh, you heard another couple behind you.
âOh my god, we should really try those viral TABS chocolate.â
âIsnât that just Viagra?â
Your interest was piqued.
âEls, can you go ahead and pay?â You handed it to her.
âYeah, sure.â
You took your phone out, and typed in TABS chocolate. It seemed like an interesting thing to try in the bedroom, and you and Ellie were always looking to try new things so it seemed like a really good opportunity. You glanced at her.
She stood by the counter, waiting for the person ahead to finish. You looked back at your phone, and ordered a pack before pocketing it and acting like you didnât just order something aphrodisiac-induced over the phone.
âReady to go?â Ellie asked, offering a hand.
You took it with an innocent smile on your lips, âyeah, letâs go.â
Within the next week, the chocolates had arrived. You were extra careful, hiding it from Ellie as you brought it in and carefully unwrapped it before snapping off a significantly large piece.
Ellie was sitting in the living room, cross legged on the couch as her eyes remained focused on the TV screen, fingers dancing over the console buttons like second nature. You took a seat beside her, scooting closer til your leg touched hers.
âNo,â you leaned your head on her shoulder, watching her play, âI have something for you.â
âWhat is it?â
âChocolate.â
You held up a piece with a smile.
Ellie glanced. âJust chocolate?â
âYeah, just chocolate,â you giggled softly, âwhat else does it look like?â
âNothinâ.â Ellie reached over, catching the piece between her teeth before chewing and eventually taking it in her mouth.
You smiled, satisfied, âis it good?â
âYeah,â Ellie chewed, âitâs chocolate.â
You gave it just enough time for Ellie to realise what sheâd eaten wasnât just chocolate. It was something way stronger.
âBaby, what was that thing you gave me?â
âWhat thing?â
You tilted your head innocently, a smile on your face as you slowly took your bathrobe off. You were fresh out of the shower, body smelling softly of vanilla as you stood there naked in front of your girlfriend who visibly was malfunctioning.
âOh. My. Fucking. Goodness.â
Ellie stepped closer and then just dropped to her knees. A low thud.
She remained there, kneeling in front of you. Her hands touched your bare thighs like you werenât real.
âFuck, youâre so pretty.â
You grinned a little, âyou wanna get in bed?â
âFuck, yeah,â Ellie said with a desperate nod and quickly pulled her shirt off, throwing it to a corner followed quickly by the rest of her clothes.
It started slowly. You climbed into Ellieâs lap, and her hands found your waist like sheâd memorised the shape of your body ages ago. She held you there and moved you back and forth.
Your bare pussy rubbed against her thigh, creating friction that made it get wetter. You shivered, shoulders tensing.
âOh, oh, that feels so good.â
âYeah baby?â Ellie pulled you in for a kiss.
Your lips met hers and you swore you felt like you were in heaven.
She moved against you rough, like sheâd been craving for intimacy for months if not years. Her hands around your body tightened. She grunted softly, feeling the sudden drip of wetness.
âFuck, babe,â she pulled away from a second, then bit your bottom lip.
You moaned, eyes closing.
âYou look so good makinâ a mess on my thigh. Make me wanna just pin yâdown, ass up, and fuck you til you pass out.â
âEllie, stop, youâreâ youâre too muchâŚâ you mumbled, your cheeks red.
Ellie didnât listen. She wasnât going to stop anytime soon.
âYâreally got some nerve, yâknow, tellinâ me to stop when youâre the one that drugged me.â
You whined, âbaby, pleaseâŚâ
âUh-huh,â she pulled you in for another kiss.
You kissed her back automatically, your pussy clenching around nothing. Ellie felt it. Her hand dropped down to cup your ass. A subtle squeeze.
You parted from the kiss.
âYou ainât got no choice, princess.â
That just turned you on even more.
You drooled, mind feeling hazy because of the intensity of the pleasure but you didnât want her to stop.
âEls, fuck, please. Please, make me feel good.â
Ellieâs grip on your ass tightened, âyâthink you deserve it?â
You nodded. âYes⌠please. Please, donât tease.â
Ellie flipped you open. You squeaked softly.
Her fingers found your cunt, rubbing up the lips before two fingers pushed up against your slit. You whined and clutched the sheets.
Ellieâs fingers moved inside fast thanks to how wet you already were. Your eyes closed tightly as you fought the urge to drool.
Ellieâs fingers moved fast and rough. Your moans slurred with the words you failed to speak. The pleasure was overwhelming you.
She was moving way too fast. You gasped softly.
âOh! Oh my goshâŚâ
And finished all over her fingers. Ellie turned you over so you were on your back, rubbing your lower abdomen.
âFuck, I canât wait to fuck you with my strap,â she said, reaching for the toy from her beside table drawer.
Your eyes were closed until you felt the prodding tip of her strap against your entrance.
She pushed it in slowly, watching as your hole stretched around the silicone dick, easily taking her in. You whined and gripped the sheets tighter, your back arching as your body stretched to accommodate the big toy.
Ellie rubbed your tummy, her warm palm against your skin as she whispered, âthere she goes, thatâs my girl.â
You tightened around the toy, clenching around her, âEllie, Els! Oh my gosh, that feels so good.â
Ellie started moving, her hips slapping the back of your thighs as she folded you. You could feel the way the bulbous head of the toy started bulging your tummy. Ellie rubbed that part, letting you feel just how full you were.
âThere you go, princess. Youâre so pretty like this. Fuck, if only I could keep this sweet pussy full of me all the time like this.â
Ellie fucked you harder. Your eyes closed, brows curling up.
âBaby! Iâmâ Iâm sââ
Your head tipped back, a thin ring of cream forming around the base of the strap as you came again. Ellie cussed under her breath and rubbed your clit with her thumb, feeling your sticky cum against her finger.
you & ellie take tabs chocolate, and fuck around like bunnies.
warnings: fem!reader, tabs chocolate, pwp, established relationship, thigh riding, praise kink, drooling, manhandling, kissing, biting, desperate sub top!ellie, sub bottom!reader, several rounds, strap, bulging
word count: 1.4k words
read on archive.
join my discord server.
âRemember weâre gonna go just to get bread,â Ellie said, putting her jacket on, âthat also cause I canât survive without grilled cheese.â
âYeah, I know.â
You checked your outfit for the seventh time that morning, before picking up your car keys but the moment you did, Ellie swatted them out of your hand. You blinked at her, confused.
âWhat?â
âYou ainât ever drivinâ when Iâm here,â Ellie wrapped one arm around your waist, âjust be my pretty passenger princess.â
âYouâre too much.â You giggled but you were blushing.
âYou love it.â
âDamn right, I do.â
You both walked out of the house. You turned to lock the door and Ellie went to rev the car out of the parking lot. Once she did, she opened the car door for you. You got in, she closed it and returned to the driversâ side.
âWeâve never really been grocery shopping so early before.â
âWell, technically weâre not grocery shopping⌠just bread.â
âJust bread, got it.â
Yeah, well you knew Ellie wouldnât ever settle for âjust breadâ.
If she saw the apple juice she loved so much, she would give you puppy eyes til you put it in the basket and bought it despite what you both agreed on back at home. Those were just the little things that bonded you and Ellie.
She parked once you both reached, and before you could reach for the doorâ she jogged on to the other side and opened it.
âCome on, princess.â
You rolled your eyes affectionately, âyouâre such a show off.â
âGotta treat my babygirl right.â
You smacked her playfully, âgo fetch bread.â
âMânot a dog.â Ellie huffed.
You raised a brow and gave her the look.
Yeah, she remembered the collar and leash in the bedroom. With a groan, she walked ahead into the store anyway. You laughed softly and followed her in. As you looked at the dates on the back of the bread to make sure itâs fresh, you heard another couple behind you.
âOh my god, we should really try those viral TABS chocolate.â
âIsnât that just Viagra?â
Your interest was piqued.
âEls, can you go ahead and pay?â You handed it to her.
âYeah, sure.â
You took your phone out, and typed in TABS chocolate. It seemed like an interesting thing to try in the bedroom, and you and Ellie were always looking to try new things so it seemed like a really good opportunity. You glanced at her.
She stood by the counter, waiting for the person ahead to finish. You looked back at your phone, and ordered a pack before pocketing it and acting like you didnât just order something aphrodisiac-induced over the phone.
âReady to go?â Ellie asked, offering a hand.
You took it with an innocent smile on your lips, âyeah, letâs go.â
Within the next week, the chocolates had arrived. You were extra careful, hiding it from Ellie as you brought it in and carefully unwrapped it before snapping off a significantly large piece.
Ellie was sitting in the living room, cross legged on the couch as her eyes remained focused on the TV screen, fingers dancing over the console buttons like second nature. You took a seat beside her, scooting closer til your leg touched hers.
âNo,â you leaned your head on her shoulder, watching her play, âI have something for you.â
âWhat is it?â
âChocolate.â
You held up a piece with a smile.
Ellie glanced. âJust chocolate?â
âYeah, just chocolate,â you giggled softly, âwhat else does it look like?â
âNothinâ.â Ellie reached over, catching the piece between her teeth before chewing and eventually taking it in her mouth.
You smiled, satisfied, âis it good?â
âYeah,â Ellie chewed, âitâs chocolate.â
You gave it just enough time for Ellie to realise what sheâd eaten wasnât just chocolate. It was something way stronger.
âBaby, what was that thing you gave me?â
âWhat thing?â
You tilted your head innocently, a smile on your face as you slowly took your bathrobe off. You were fresh out of the shower, body smelling softly of vanilla as you stood there naked in front of your girlfriend who visibly was malfunctioning.
âOh. My. Fucking. Goodness.â
Ellie stepped closer and then just dropped to her knees. A low thud.
She remained there, kneeling in front of you. Her hands touched your bare thighs like you werenât real.
âFuck, youâre so pretty.â
You grinned a little, âyou wanna get in bed?â
âFuck, yeah,â Ellie said with a desperate nod and quickly pulled her shirt off, throwing it to a corner followed quickly by the rest of her clothes.
It started slowly. You climbed into Ellieâs lap, and her hands found your waist like sheâd memorised the shape of your body ages ago. She held you there and moved you back and forth.
Your bare pussy rubbed against her thigh, creating friction that made it get wetter. You shivered, shoulders tensing.
âOh, oh, that feels so good.â
âYeah baby?â Ellie pulled you in for a kiss.
Your lips met hers and you swore you felt like you were in heaven.
She moved against you rough, like sheâd been craving for intimacy for months if not years. Her hands around your body tightened. She grunted softly, feeling the sudden drip of wetness.
âFuck, babe,â she pulled away from a second, then bit your bottom lip.
You moaned, eyes closing.
âYou look so good makinâ a mess on my thigh. Make me wanna just pin yâdown, ass up, and fuck you til you pass out.â
âEllie, stop, youâreâ youâre too muchâŚâ you mumbled, your cheeks red.
Ellie didnât listen. She wasnât going to stop anytime soon.
âYâreally got some nerve, yâknow, tellinâ me to stop when youâre the one that drugged me.â
You whined, âbaby, pleaseâŚâ
âUh-huh,â she pulled you in for another kiss.
You kissed her back automatically, your pussy clenching around nothing. Ellie felt it. Her hand dropped down to cup your ass. A subtle squeeze.
You parted from the kiss.
âYou ainât got no choice, princess.â
That just turned you on even more.
You drooled, mind feeling hazy because of the intensity of the pleasure but you didnât want her to stop.
âEls, fuck, please. Please, make me feel good.â
Ellieâs grip on your ass tightened, âyâthink you deserve it?â
You nodded. âYes⌠please. Please, donât tease.â
Ellie flipped you open. You squeaked softly.
Her fingers found your cunt, rubbing up the lips before two fingers pushed up against your slit. You whined and clutched the sheets.
Ellieâs fingers moved inside fast thanks to how wet you already were. Your eyes closed tightly as you fought the urge to drool.
Ellieâs fingers moved fast and rough. Your moans slurred with the words you failed to speak. The pleasure was overwhelming you.
She was moving way too fast. You gasped softly.
âOh! Oh my goshâŚâ
And finished all over her fingers. Ellie turned you over so you were on your back, rubbing your lower abdomen.
âFuck, I canât wait to fuck you with my strap,â she said, reaching for the toy from her beside table drawer.
Your eyes were closed until you felt the prodding tip of her strap against your entrance.
She pushed it in slowly, watching as your hole stretched around the silicone dick, easily taking her in. You whined and gripped the sheets tighter, your back arching as your body stretched to accommodate the big toy.
Ellie rubbed your tummy, her warm palm against your skin as she whispered, âthere she goes, thatâs my girl.â
You tightened around the toy, clenching around her, âEllie, Els! Oh my gosh, that feels so good.â
Ellie started moving, her hips slapping the back of your thighs as she folded you. You could feel the way the bulbous head of the toy started bulging your tummy. Ellie rubbed that part, letting you feel just how full you were.
âThere you go, princess. Youâre so pretty like this. Fuck, if only I could keep this sweet pussy full of me all the time like this.â
Ellie fucked you harder. Your eyes closed, brows curling up.
âBaby! Iâmâ Iâm sââ
Your head tipped back, a thin ring of cream forming around the base of the strap as you came again. Ellie cussed under her breath and rubbed your clit with her thumb, feeling your sticky cum against her finger.
.đĽ Ý Ëđ¸ď¸spider-girlđˇ.đĽ Ý Ë | chapter one
ellie williams x reader | MASTERLIST
wc: 3k
summary: your nerdy chemistry tutor is secretly the web slinging superhero of new york city
cw: ellie is obsessed, gay panic, some pretty dark thoughts, violence, mentions of death/grief, bullying, mentions of sex, self deprecation/depression, girly reader, ellie swears a lot, reader is closetedÂ
notes: nobody asked for another spider!ellie fic but she won't leave my mind so i had to return to tumblr lol, pls be nice iâm new
Ellie wasn't born lucky.
She didnât believe in luck for most of her lifeâ more so, didnât believe luck was something meant for her.
After losing both of her parents as a child, she was shipped off to Manhattan to live with her uncle, Joel. Joel was a truck driver who would leave her for weeks at a time, completely alone. When he actually was home, he was almost always passed out drunk on his recliner. She knew he was never the same after losing his wife. She loved him anyway.
Ellie learned to do everything by herself. It helped that she was incredibly gifted, and extremely smart from a young age.
Learning was the only thing that truly distracted her from how sad and lonely she was.
Ellie does at least have two real friends, Dina and Jesse. The two lovebirds who would stick by her through anything. They made her feel lucky.
They are also the only two people who know that sheâs the secret masked hero of New York City, Spider Girl.
She wasnât sure if the radioactive spider that bit her and gave her superpowers was luck. Some days it felt like an unbearable burden. She started to feel responsible for all the crime, the pain, the hurt. Every destroyed building, every injured victim, every life she couldnât save, all her fault. It repeats in her head, uninvited. Allyourfaultallyourfaultallyourfaultallyourfaultâ
A crash snaps her out of her self deprecation. It takes her half a second to realize she was the cause of the collision, all her textbooks and notes falling all over the crowded school hallway. She questions if she lost her powers. How did she not see that coming?
âFuckâ I meanâ shitâ sorry!â She scrambles, trying to find her words, kneeling to attempt to pick up her scattered notes as fellow students step on them with their dirty shoes.
âDonât be sorryâ I was totally zoned out.â You say, kneeling opposite of her, helping her pick up her notes. You glance over her notes, a perfect balance of messy handwriting and color coordination.
Ellie looks up at you, a faint pink blush appears on her pale skin. âYou really donât have to help me.â She says as you hand her a pile of her notes.
âYouâre Ellie, right?â You ask.
Oh my god she knows my name sheknowsmynamesheknowsmynamesheknowsmyâ
âYeah. Thatâsâ thatâs me.â She says, releasing a breath she was accidentally holding. Ellie tries to hide how completely flustered and embarrassed she is, the hallway suddenly feels ten times louder.
You take a proper look at her for the first time. Youâve only ever seen her from a distance. Her clothes were baggy and havenât been in style since the 90s, her messy hair pulled into a bun, wired headphones in her ears, who still even has those? The bags under her eyes were so dark you could almost feel how heavy they must be.
You put your hands on her arms gently, guiding her back up to her feet. Ellie was always quick on her feet since she got her powers, but something about the way you were looking at her made her feel unsteady.
âLike, âtop of the classâ Ellie?â You ask.
She nods, shyly. She wishes she could brag about any of the other cool shit sheâs done, but being smart is hopefully enough to impress you.
You direct her to start walking with you so youâre not standing in the middle of the crowded hall. Her ears go red because sheâs walking with you.
âMaybe you can help me study sometime. Iâm like, totally about to flunk these midterms. My parents will kill me if I get anything less than Aâs.â You joke. But itâs kind of not a joke. Your parents mean business and everyone knows that. Your father practically owns half of Manhattan. Ellie read about your extended family once in a history book in the library.
âUhhâ sureâ sure, yeah. I can like, tutor you, if you want, if that sounds cool to youââ She chokes out.
God Ellieâ stop talking, stop talking, stop!!!!!!
âItâs chemistry, specifically.â You say, shyly.
Ellie clears her throat, still clutching onto her books like a safety blanket. âI can definitely help you with that.â She says more confidently, not mentioning her literal perfect grade in that subject.
âPerfect, maybe I can get your number and we can schedule something? I can totally pay you to help me by the way.â You say, opening your phone and handing it off to her.
Her hands shake as she tries to type her number into your phone. âHere.â She says, handing it back. âT-text me, yeah. Iâm free this weekend. I donât want your money though, maybe a coffee instead?â Your hands brush as your phone gets passed back.
Goddammit her hands are so soft sheâs so pretty and perfect and oh my god she shouldnât even be seen with a pathetic loser like me
âAlright, fine. Just a coffee. Iâll text you!â You say cheerfully, taking a different turn down the hall.
Ellie stands there, stunned.
â
âDonât be so delusional,â Jesse says, his eyes focused on the game, hands on the controller tightly. âItâs not a study date. Itâs tutoring. She just knows youâre dorky as hell.â He adds, knocking Ellie off her high horse.
âHey! Be nice.â Dina says from the other couch, working on her homework.
âHow can I be normal about it when sheâs that pretty?â Ellie jokes, eyes also glued to the TV.
âGirls like that donât go for nerds. Sheâs just mooching off you. And sheâs definitely not gay, I heard last year sheââ
âDonât.â Ellie and Dina say in unison.
âIâm just trying to protect your feelings!â Jesse says, tossing the controller after another lost round.
âJust tell her youâre Spider Girl and sheâll be all over you.â Dina jokes.
âRight. Like itâs that easy.â Ellie rolls her eyes.
âIf the whole school finds out, youâll actually have a date to homecoming.â Jesse jokes, always pushing the joke too far.
Ellie hits him over the head, not enough to hurt but enough to mess up his hair. âYouâre an ass.â
Dina scoffs at her boyfriend. âKeep talking like that and Iâll be Ellieâs date instead.â
âCâmon, you know I love you both. I just want to keep my girls safe.â He says, his tone softening. Itâs true, Jesse would do absolutely anything to keep them safe, and heâs half of the brains behind Ellieâs new faster web shooters and stronger web fluid. He stays up late most nights watching the news obsessively, making sure Spider Woman is never reported injured, or worse.
â
You meet Ellie on a sunny fall Saturday afternoon in the park. She looks straight out of a movie, sitting there alone surrounded by textbooks and notes on her picnic blanket. She rearranges the notes for the 5th time, trying to look busy as you arrive.
âOhâ hi!â She says when she spots you. She wants to kick herself immediately for how awkward it sounded coming out of her mouth.
âHelloooo, I brought your coffee, as requested.â You say, handing her drink off to her, she squints at you in the sunlight as she accepts it. She feels a wave of relief now that youâre here, the anticipation was killing her.
Ellie locks into her teacher voice immediately, confidently explaining to you the lesson and the notes she copied for you. Her ease with science helps her not get distracted by the way your hair shines in the golden sunlight.
âI made you these flashcards, I color coordinated them, and drew little pictures to help you remember.â Ellie says bashfully, showing you the cards.
Your face lights up. âYou made these for me?â You take the flash cards in your hands, skimming through them.
âYeah, the drawings help me remember thingsâŚâ She sounds almost embarrassed as she says it. Ellie can feel her heart racing as she watches you admire the cards.
âThis one is cute.â You say, laughing as you hold it up. Itâs two molecules with happy faces. Ellieâs face burns, but she cracks a smile at your laughter. Youâre laughing at her drawings.
âFocus.â Ellie retorts, trying to spare her embarrassment. She scoots closer accidentally (totally on purpose) and slips back into teacher mode. No more stumbling over her words, sheâs comfortable now that she actually knows what to say.
You lay on the blanket, propped up on your elbow. You sip your latte and stare at her, nodding to show her youâre still listening. This closeness is the perfect opportunity for you to really look at her, to analyze every detail. Ellie was charming, in a strange way. Her presence is powerful as she teaches. Her voice is warm⌠itâs comforting. She smells like cologne and smoke and girly shampoo. Her eyes are so tired. Her iPhone is next to her textbooks, half smashed. You donât know how she can even see what she texts you. She must be going through something difficult. Youâd never ask, though.
âYou still listening?â She asks.
âAhâ sorry. I was totally zoned out.â
Ellie feels like she might die. You were just zoned out staring at her. The sight of you all laid out on the blanket looking like an absolute goddess is making her throat dry up. As much as sheâs loving every second with you, sheâs so nervous that itâs making her stomach hurt.
As torturous as the next hour is, having to pretend sheâs fine, she realizes itâs the least amount of time sheâs spent thinking about crime or police or violence in the city.
Youâre a healthy distraction to her.
â
As the week progresses, Ellie realizes you were a little too much of a distraction.
Sheâd never admit it, she barely even admits it to herself, but Ellie changed her usual patrol route to keep an eye on you, learning your schedule, your usual places. Itâs not spying⌠just making sure youâre safe. That's what she tells herself at least.
Your routine was the same most days, school, homework and studying at the coffee shop, ballet class, then home for dinner. Ellie totally wasnât a creep for having this memorized. She just wanted to protect you. Right?
You skipped dinner one night to stay at the dance studio and practice. Ellie watches from a rooftop nearby, she could feel your emotion in your movements. She was completely mesmerized by you, unable to look away. She would stay here all night if she could. She leans closer, watching you float across the floor, completely captivated.
She only snaps out of it once you stop dancing and pack up your bag. As you exit the studio that night, she watches carefully from the rooftops, secretly following you. And thankfully she did, because you were stopped and cornered by two men who were clearly up to no good.
Their body language is predatorial. One man backing you up against the brick wall, the other blocking your escape route, she canât hear what theyâre saying to you but she knows itâs nothing pretty.
She jumps down without a second thought, swinging into the alleyway, she lands gracefully, ready for a fight. Her suit shines in the city street lights, she looks like the picture perfect hero right now.
Her voice is calm, despite the adrenaline coursing through her. âHey guys, having fun harassing little girls?â She says, standing tall.
âOh, look who finally decided to show up.â One of the men grumbles, dropping his glass bottle, taking out a knife. The second man grabs you quickly, putting you in a headlock. You try to kick your way out of his grip but heâs got you held tight.
Ellieâs breath hitches, realizing their motives are even worse than she thought. She wants to run at the man with his hands on you, but youâre in the way and God if she ever hurt you by accident sheâd never be able to live with herself. She draws her attention back to the man with the knife.
âYouâve been waiting for me? How romantic.â She jokes, shooting her webs at his wrist as he charges towards her with the knife. She snaps his wrist back so tightly he cries out in pain, dropping the knife. She quickly kicks it out of his reach.
With a swift punch to his jaw and a few kicks to the ribs, heâs curled up next to a dumpster, groaning.
What a pussy.
She webs his body in a sticky cocoon to the dumpster so he canât go anywhere, she almost smiles at the sight. Asshole.
With one threat neutralized, she looks back over to you. Her stomach drops when she sees how red your face has gotten, struggling to breathe in the manâs grip.
âLet go and Iâll go easy on you.â She tries to bribe, her eyes narrowed, voice even deeper than usual. You can see the rage in her eyes through the mask. Tears stream down your face as you try to speak, but you canât.
He laughs mockingly, grabbing you even tighter, you let out a desperate cry. âYou gonna web me up like a bug, little spider girl?â
Ellieâs patience snaps.
âWrong move.â She says
Now I get to be mean.
Her vision tunnels on him, moving before she can even think. In an absolutely brutal motion, she grabs his head with her webs and slams his skull against the brick wall. The impact is enough for you to escape his grasp, you crawl away, gasping for air. You back up against the opposite wall, trying to decide if you should stay or run.
Ellie gets carried away in a fit of rage, her anger making her completely ruthless. She forces the man to look at her as she grabs him by the hair and hits his head repeatedly against the brick. He cries out pathetically with every hit. The sound of it is sickening. She hates how easily she could let herself fucking kill him.
She finally drops him, webbing him against the wall so he canât move. Both men are trapped now, she releases a shaky breath and runs over to you. Her heart is still pounding wildly in her chest at the sight of you.
âAre you alright?â She asks, crouching down, assessing you for any injuries.
Tears are still streaming down your face as you reply. âIâm not hurt, just s-scared.â Your voice breaks at the last word.
Ellie wipes a tear off your cheek with a gloved hand. She hates the way that this feels like her fault. âCan I take you home? Or do you want the cops to drive you? I already paged them.â Ellieâs voice is softer now. She forces herself to focus on you instead of the lowlife freaks webbed behind her.
âDonât leave me.â You say, the words coming out before you can even think about how weak they sound.
Ellieâs heart does a goddamn backflip at the sound of your voice begging her to stay.
âIâm right here. I got you. Câmon, can you stand up for me?â She says.
She keeps a firm grip on your arm and gently helps you back up to your feet. Youâre still visibly shaken up and it makes her chest ache.
You tell her your address and she smirks under the mask because duh Iâve been watching you for the last week and of course I know exactly where you live and now I have to stand here and pretend weâre strangers
She shoots a web to the top of the building. âDo you trust me?â She asks, sliding her hand to your waist. Her palm burns at the contact, even through the glove.
âOh, youâre not seriousââ You actually crack a smile at her crazy suggestion.
âHold onto me.â She says confidently. Your arms wrap around her shoulders and you hold tightly. It takes all of her willpower to hold herself together at the feeling of it
âItâll be fun.â She says, lifting you both off the ground, youâre swinging through the air in seconds. âI know a shortcut!â She shouts. Suddenly all the stress and tears are gone, replaced with laughter and adrenaline.
âOh my god!!!â You shout between fits of laughter as she swings you through the city. Sheâs focusing harder than ever, your warmth and your laugh is incredibly distracting.
The city lights blur with her speed, sheâs hyper aware of every point of contact. Your arms around her neck, your thighs against her hips, your chests pressed together, fuck.
She lands gracefully on your fire escape. âThis one?â She asks. She already knows exactly which window is yours.
âYeah.â You say breathlessly.
âAlright, home safe and sound thenâŚâ she says, reluctantly setting you down just outside the window, not wanting the moment to end. She feels so cold without your touch. She turns away from you, about to swing away.
âWait!ââ
She freezes and turns back.
âWho are you?â You ask, thereâs so much admiration in your tone it makes her feel sick. Sheâd be so disappointed if she knew the truth.
âNo one special.â She says, jumping off your fire escape and swinging into the night.
â
Ellie loses her gracefulness as she practically falls through her bedroom window, ripping her mask off immediately. The apartment she shares with Joel is as cold and empty as ever.
She kicks off her suit as she walks to the bathroom, turning the shower water as hot as she can handle. Her mind is a cluttered mess.
What if she finds out itâs me?
What if she gets hurt because of me?
Sheâs too good to even be seen with me.
I should ghost her tomorrow for our study session.
I want to tell her the truth so bad.
Fuck, sheâs so pretty.
She scrubs her hands over her face aggressively in the shower, trying to force herself to think of anything but you.
Ellie climbs into bed that night and immediately pulls out her sketchbook, looking down at the (totally not creepy) drawing she did of you laying on the picnic blanket in the park.
She grabs her pencil and starts sketching you in the dance studio, hoping she wonât ever lose that memory.
PART 1 - âgive me envy, give me malice, give me your attention.â
stoner!ellie x popular!reader ft. exgf!jock!abby
synopsis: after getting cheated on and dumped by her girlfriend abby anderson, reader finds comfort in the company of ellie fucking williams, the girl she had despised since 7th grade. after discovering the girl abby cheated with is no other than ellieâs ex-girlfriend, cat, the pair is only brought closer togetherâbut is shared heartbreak and mutual tolerance enough to counteract years of festered resentment? the tension rising between reader and ellie finally snaps during a night of partying as quick presumptions and liquid courage leave reader with a drunken kiss sheâll either regret or cherish for the rest of her youth.
word count: 8.8k (i know, sheâs chunky.)
contains: cheating, highschool stereotypes, weed, alcohol use, swearing, reader canât drive for shit (she lowk rear ends someone but everyone is okay), kissing, making out, enemies to loverssss?????, ellie is a YEARNER, reader highkey is too, kind of a slow burn, a bit of loser!ellie, fake dating next chapter (also maybe some smut there too but u didnât hear it from me)
a/n: i genuinely had so much fun writing this. this is the first fan fic iâve ever written so i hope you enjoyyy! and feel free to share your thoughts! lowkey it takes some time before ellie is introduced so just be patient, i had to set up the drama between reader n abby yk. i really tried to lean into the high school clichĂŠ yuri CRACK side of this so i hope you can tell!!
It was as if God himself was fucking with you.Â
You were a rat in a cage, and every time you fell for the sweet bait laid in front of your eyes and consequently got stuck in the punishing grasp of the awaiting spring-loaded steel trap, your suffering became his sadistic fulfillment.
Thatâs what you were sure of, at least, because this past week of your life has been so tragically humiliating that it must have been a part of some sort of punishment for whatever sins youâve committed in your past life.
In the second semester of your junior year, you developed the fattest crush on this girl in your grade. Her name was Abby, and she was a player on your school's varsity soccer team, and a damn good one at that. She was intelligent too, planning to follow in her father's footsteps of going to med-school and becoming a doctor. There was something about her that you couldn't quite resist. With her kind eyes, broad shoulders, and a smile so bright it creased her freckle-adorned cheeks, Abigail Anderson had charmed you, a part of your heart already preparing itself to be carved out and set aside in devotion to her.
So, when Abby asked you out to prom in the spring, you didn't hesitate to say yes, jumping up and squealing in excitement as you threw your arms around her neck.
Prom was perfect, the baby pink color of your long, sequined dress matching Abby's tie. The two of you were practically inseparable for the entire night, exhibiting the behavior of what some would consider "puppy love."
Abby wasn't your only highlight of the night, though. The moment they called your name out for prom princess, your heart filled so full you swore that it would spill out any second. As they placed the glittering sash over your shoulder, you truly felt like a girl at the end of a coming of age movie, like you had finally found where you belonged in the world, and it was here, under flashing lights in the venue of your high school prom, the validating cheers of your peers blaring through the room.
With a gleaming tiara on your head and Abby on your arm, you knew this night would be one that you would remember forever.
That summer, in the blaring heat of a June sun, Abby asked you to be her girlfriend, and just as you had in response to her promposal only a few weeks earlier, you enthusiastically accepted, throwing yourself into her arms.
Between tanning beside glittering swimming pools with your best-friends, getting virgin piĂąa coladas with your mom, and sneaking out with your new girlfriend, you thought you had the best senior summer a girl could ever ask forâand thatâs without mentioning the cherry on top: your father gifting you your dream car, a pink Mercedes-Benz.Â
So, when it was time to begin your senior year at Jackson High School, you had not even a single doubt in your foolish belief that your senior year would live up to the expectations of your Hollywood-inspired fantasies you had possessed through all of your youth.
With your sexy buff girlfriend by your side and a hot new ride, your year was bound to go perfectly, right?
As you soon discovered, all expectations you had could be totaled up to nothing but the wet dream of a naïve spoiled suburban princess.
Just a few weeks into the first semester, you were driving yourself to school in your 21st century royal carriage, iced coffee in hand and bedazzled sunglasses balanced on your nose, when the shitty Subaru in front of you slammed on their brakes abruptly, causing you to run into them from behind.
"What the fuck?!" the car in front of you stepped out, fury ridden in every crease of their face.
After profusely apologizing to the angry stranger and offering to pay for repairs, you ended up sobbing while attempting to explain what you had gotten yourself into on the phone with your father, who only sighed in disappointment on the other end, âDaddy, it wasnât my fault, I swear! They were the one who slammed on their brakes in front of me!â
Though you didnât know yet, this accident only marked the beginning of the most humiliating week of your life.
Graciously, your parents let you stay home from school that day as you grieved your pink Mercedes. Their mercy didn't last for long, though, as they forced you to go back the next day, not allowing you to miss anymore school.
To your dismay, the angle at which your car was impacted left it in no condition to be driven. Since your parents both had work and Abby claimed she had an early morning gym sesh planned, you found yourself riding the infamous Big Cheese to school that morning. You felt so humiliated being a senior and having to ride the bus to school. The pickled odor ruminating through the air combined with the sticky seats left you less than comfortable, to say the least. Some underclassmen boys were play fighting behind you, and one ended up elbowing you in the face. You glared at them offensively, but neither of them offered so much as an apology, just continuing to laugh obnoxiously while sloppily throwing their hands at each other.
You started that day already pissed off, and what made it worse was that Abby had been acting distant. In fact, she had been acting distant ever since the first week of the semester. She had only been replying to all your texts with one-word responses, and she had been avoiding you at school, too. When you texted her regarding her distant behavior, she just replied, "dw abt it, baby."
Safe to say, you were angry, but you didn't know if there was anything you could do about it. After all, you didn't have any reason to suspect her of doing anything wrong.
You were about to fall asleep in study hall when all of a sudden you got a notification from your best friend Dina.
wifey dina <3 - 10:05 AM
"holy shit, did you see cat's story?"
you - 10:05 am
"who the fuck is cat?"
wifey dina <3 - 10:05 AM
"she's like some stoner chick. has tattoos n shit."
wifey dina <3 sent an attachment
Upon clicking on the photo Dina sent you, you audibly gasped. It was a screenshot of an Instagram story, a grainy photo of some girl with black micro bangs (who you presumed was Cat) with her hand wrapped around someone's hickey-littered neck from behind while leaning down and biting their bicep.
It wasn't just anyone's bicep, though. You would recognize those freckled broad shoulders from anywhere, and the dirty blonde baby hairs peaking out from behind the person's ears only confirmed your suspicions.
you - 10:06 AM
"i fucking know that's not abby."
wifey dina <3 - 10:06 AM
"babe, i'm afraid it is.â
âand leah told me that she overheard someone saying that they saw them making out behind the bleachers yesterday after school too.â
You didn't know what to do. You didnât want to cry in the middle of class, but your tightening throat and the tears blurring your vision didnât really give you much of a choice. Sure, you had only been dating Abby for a couple of months, but part of you felt like you truly loved her.
Your mind began racing: Is this why Abby has been so avoidant? Is it my fault? Am I not pretty enough? Did I not give her enough attention?
wifey dina <3 - 10:07 AM
âiâm so sorry, doll.â
âyou deserve so much better.â
Damn right you did, and after the initial wave of sadness and heartbreak washed over, you were immediately filled with rage.
As the bell rang for lunch, you marched toward the cafeteria with more purpose than a Navy SEAL.
If Abby had no issue with carelessly making this such a public ordeal that you had to find out through a blurry screenshot, then you didnât have any problem making your confrontation a scene.
Usually, Abby would sit with all her soccer friends, while you would sit with the cheerleading girls.
Today, though, you stomped directly towards Abbyâs table, calling out her name angrily as you approached.
When at first she didnât hear you, you yanked on her shoulder forcefully, shouting her name again to capture her full attention.
âOh my godâwhat the fuck, babe?â
âDonât call me that.â
âWhat is your problem?â
âMy problem is that you think itâs okay to just run around and fuck other girls when you have a girlfriend.â
âYouâre seriously accusing me of cheating on you?â
At this point, her entire table was either staring at the two of you or whispering and snickering amongst themselves, but you couldnât have cared less in the heat of the moment.
âOh, Iâm not accusing you. I know what you did, so donât even try to lie to me.â You pulled out your phone, shoving the screenshot of Catâs story in Abbyâs face, âMind telling me what the fuck youâre doing here?â
Abby just scoffed in disbelief, staring at your phone scathingly, as if you would have never caught on if it wasnât for the stupid, tattletale device in your hand.
She returned her gaze to you, âBabe, I can explainââ
You interrupted her before she could even start, âAbby, please. Donât try to lie to me. I mean, for fuckâs sake, people are running around saying they saw the two of you making out! Thereâs no explaining this.â
To you, it didnât matter what she said at this point. Even if she apologized, the hurt had already been caused.
Abby sighed, defeated, âI think we should just break up.â
âWhatâ?â
âYeah, if you really feel that way, then I donât thinkââ
âNo.â
âNo?â
âNo! You cheated on me. You donât get to dump me now. Iâm the one dumping you.â
Abby raised her eyebrows and smirked as if she just couldnât take you seriously, âAre you sure? Because Iâm pretty sure Iâm the one who said that we should break up first.â
Abbyâs snarky facial expression combined with the obnoxious snickering of all of her friends made your blood boil. You had never been more pissed off in your life.
"You know what? I fucking can't with you. Donât try to talk to me ever again. Iâll see you in hell.â
You hoped your dramatic exit would be something iconic or even badass that would stick in Abbyâs mind and make her immediately regret ever breaking your heart.
However, as fate would have it, something less ideal occurred. As you walked backward, you bumped into someone, causing you to yelp while falling onto your ass as their black coffee got spilled all over your shirt.
Abby and all her friends began laughing hysterically. At this point, your face must have been flushed completely crimson. Now, whether it was more from anger or embarrassment, you didnât really know.
Getting back up on your feet, you were fully prepared to berate the moron that let you get drenched and humiliated at the hands of their carelessness, but as you saw the person responsible for your misery, your blood boiled even hotter (if that was still possible), your eyes narrowing in on her scrawny figure.
Ellie fucking Williams.
Well, technically the one who spilled the coffee on you was her idiot best friend, Jesse, not Ellie, but you knew it somehow had to be Ellieâs fault anyways. Why? Because it just fucking had to be, nothing else would make sense. Ellie hated you, and you hated her. Itâs just how it was.
If anyone were to ask you when the feud began, you wouldnât have been able to answer exactly when. Maybe it started in middle school when you spread a rumor that she was a druggie and her dad was a satanic cult leaderâor maybe sophomore year when she muttered something about you being a âspoiled, dim-witted, bratâ under her breath when you passed her in the hallway, and when you forcefully turned around to quip something back, you tripped onto your face in front of half your school, effectively destroying the heel on your favorite pair of pink pumps and spraining your ankle in the process, all while the little demon laughed at you from behind.
For a while after that incident, nothing else had happened between the two of you. No drama, no rumors, no petty remarks, nothing. It was peaceful, you thought maybe the tension had finally dulled between you both. Well, that was until last November when she sent photos of you drinking at a Halloween party to the principal, almost causing you to lose your position as captain of your schoolâs varsity cheer team. What business did that stoner have tattling on anyone over substance use, anyway? Well, you didnât have any way of knowing for sure Ellie was the one who snitched on you; the report was anonymous, of course. But it seemed obvious to you that she was the only one bitter enough to do something so petty with the sole motivation of hurting you and your reputation.
It didnât even have to be about the trivial dramatics; just the way Ellie presented and carried herself was a mortal sin against everything that you stood for. You were the spoiled princess of poised perfection and cherry flavored lip gloss dressed in rhinestoned true religion jeans and lacey pink baby doll tops, locked in your upper middle-class towerâwhile she was the fire-breathing, smoke-exhaling, lighter-slinging dragon with dingy black scales and worn wings, adorning silver piercings and black eyeshadow, lurking from outside palace walls as the epitome of a suburban pariah.
Everything about her made your blood boil. It was as if the resentment between you was fated, written in the stars, no matter how horribly clichĂŠ it was.
So, naturally, you had to suspect her of scheming on your downfall through even the most insignificant things.
âIâm so sorry, I didnât mean to!â Jesse scrambled to apologize, but it was too late, rage had already consumed you.
âDo you not fucking pay attention to what youâre doing?â
Ellie decided now was the best time to butt into the conversation, attempting to rescue her friend from the blunt end of your wrath, âHey, câmon, dude. Yâknow he didnât mean to.â
You glared at Ellie as if she was the most malevolent creature in the whole world, âDo you really wanna be talking right now, Ellie? I know this is all your doing.â
She laughed at you like you sounded crazy, âWhat? How is this my doing?â
âBecause,â through your anger, you still tried to make sense of all the shit you were spewing, âonly you are bitter and spiteful enough to do something so petty just to embarrass me!â
Ellie furrowed her brows at you in disbelief, "How the hell is it my fault that you bumped into Jesse? Youâre the one embarrassing yourself, you don't need my help to do so.â
You scoffed, irritated by her audacity, âListen, if this was any other day, I just might let this go, but you chose the worst possible time to fuck with me."
"Again, I didn't do anything to fuck with you. Get over yourself, princess."
Princess. You fucking hated when she called you that, condescension laced so firmly in her voice that it never failed to leave you feeling thoroughly disrespected and so impossibly small.
You rolled your eyes at her, "Just leave me alone, Ellie."
As you walked away, you internally hoped she didnât hear the little crack in your voice from your tight throat, warm tears threatening to pour out your eyes.
You slipped into the first bathroom you spotted outside the cafeteria, finding refuge in a quiet stall as you hurled your legs into fetal position. There, you finally let yourself cry.
You werenât crying over your altercation with Ellie, of course. You werenât even crying over your break up, really. It was just everything. You were so overwhelmed. For the past few days, it felt as if you werenât ever able to catch a break, not even for a second. It all just kept on coming, and a girl could only be so strong.
So, when the bell rung, you decided that, after the week youâve had, you didnât have it in you anymore to sit in a miserable classroom with a bunch of sweaty kids for an hour while trying and failing to understand whatever shit your math teacher had on the board that day.
Instead of going to class, you slipped out of a side door of the school, concluding all you needed was some fresh air.
"You still pouting, princess?"
You whipped your head around to meet the condescending voice calling at you, only to see Ellie Williams, again.
You huffed, âWhat do you want, Ellie?â
She looked so smug, sitting there with one leg tucked against her chest and the other lazily stretched out against the ground. She pulled out the blunt gently pressed between her lips, exhaling soft gray smoke into the air.
âWhy donât you come and join me?â
âAnd do what? Sit there and smoke weed for an hour then walk back into class and pretend people canât smell the shit on me?â
âSure, why not? Maybe it would help you chill out for once.â
You crossed your arms in defiance, shocked at her audacity to ask you to smoke with her after the shit she pulled earlier today.Â
You could brush her off and say you had better things to do, but you did have a really shitty day. You could use something to relax after everything youâve been through. Besides, maybe it would help to have someone to rant to.
You quickly glanced around, checking for any cameras or people around that could rat you out, but you didnât see anything. After all, Ellie did this all the time, and she never got caught.
You huffed defiantly, crossing your arms as you slipped into the space on the concrete staircase beside Ellie.
She handed you the blunt, but you just stared at it dumbly, not fully understanding what she was expecting of you.
Ellie smirked, âYouâve never smoked before, have you?â
You glared at her, âWhat do you think, Ellie?â
Ellie grinned before taking the blunt back, âAll you have to do is press it against your lips and inhale, just like this.â
You stared at her mouth as she demonstrated, thin paper brushing against the soft pads of her rosy pink lips. As she exhaled, the wind carried the smoke through the air, allowing you to breathe in its herbal scent.
Once complete, Ellie turned towards you. She leaned in, placing the blunt in your hand as her hand clasped over yours, guiding the blunt towards your lips.
Your cheeks burned red from the proximity as you took a hit from the joint, maintaining eye contact with her the entire time.
As she pulled the blunt away from your lips, you were immediately thrown into a fit of coughs, all while Ellie laughed at you, clearly finding amusement in your failure.
Once recollecting yourself, you glared at Ellie once more, smacking the tattoo on her forearm, âHey! Quit laughing at me!â
âOkay, okay! Iâm sorry!â Ellie took a deep breath, trying to restrain herself from cracking up again and pissing you off further, âYâknow, donât feel bad. A lot of people struggle when they first start.â
âReally?â
âYeah! I mean, I didnât really. But Iâm sure lots of other people do!â
You rolled your eyes, âYeah, whatever.â
For a moment, the two of you just sat there, enjoying each otherâs silence and the chill breeze of the September air.
Watching Ellie take a hit from the joint, you grew a bit hungry for another.
âEllie?â
âMhm?â
âCan I have another hit?â you asked sweetly, your doe eyes pleading to her.
Ellie passed you the blunt back, but not without smirking while doing so. Why did she have to look so god damn smug all the time?
This time you took it much more smoothly, no coughing involved. Ellie even nodded her approval.
In your mellowed state of mind, you became the first to break the silence, âWhy did you invite me to smoke with you anyways?â
Ellie shrugged, âI told you, I thought it would help you be not so stuck-up for once.â
You shook your head, âYeah, but weâve never really gotten along.â Residing in the calm solitude the two of you shared now, you couldnât help but laugh at the stupidity of your guysâ past altercations, âI mean, our interaction in the cafeteria today wasnât exactly friendly.â
âEh, I saw you and Abby fighting right before. âFigured that had to be the reason you were acting so particularly bitchy today.â
You groaned at the mention of your ex-girlfriendâs name, âUgh, Abby.â
âWhat happened between the two of you anyways?â
You sighed, annoyance permeating through the tone of your voice, âShe cheated on me.â
âOh my god, that sucks.â
âYeah, it does, and I had to find out through a fucking Instagram story too. I felt so humiliated.â
âIâm sorry, thatâs horrible,â Ellie comforted you as she reached over to her water bottle, twisting off itâs plastic cap. âIf you donât mind me asking, who did she cheat on you with? Itâs hard for me to imagine she couldâve done much better than you.â
You knew that she didnât mean much by the last comment. She said it so casually, but you couldnât help but feel a bit flustered anyways.
âItâs some girl named Cat,â you answered.
When you looked back at Ellie, she was choking on the sip of water she had just taken.
You placed some gentle blows on her back, trying to help her out.
âHey, are you okay? Is something wrong?â you asked, concern laced in your voice.
She managed her words through coughs, âYeahâyeah, Iâm fine.â
She coughed a bit more before recollecting herself, finally responding to what you said, âYeah, Cat isnât shit. Abby fucked up, for sure.â
The two of you sat there for a while longer, exchanging stories with each other, talking about people from your school, and laughing at each other's stupid jokes.
You didnât like to admit it, but part of you had started to develop a real understanding of her. She could be really nice when the two of you werenât dead set on hating the other. At one point, you mentioned that you were hungry, and she gave you a full bag of sour gummy worms. It mightâve just been candy, but that moment had to have been the nicest sheâs ever been to you in all your time of knowing her.
Who wouldâve known that the two of you could actually really enjoy each other's company? (Even if you had to be a little bit high to do so.)
When the bell that finally cut school out rang, you were surprised. You didnât think you had been out there with her for that long, but maybe time just seemed to pass by faster when you were hanging out with her.
You groaned as students piled out of the building.
âWhatâs wrong?â Ellie asked as she threw all her things back into her bag.
âMy carâs broken and I donât want to ride the busâŚâ
âI could drive you home if you want,â Ellie offered.
âReally?â
âYeah, sure. Your house canât be that far away.â
The ride home was quiet, but never awkward. Somehow it didnât feel weird to be in Ellieâs space, listening to her playlist softly playing from her carâs speakers. It was almost comforting, but the thought of accepting that made you want to throw up.
So, instead, you just stared out the window, trying to force your mind to not think about the humiliation you had endured this week or, arguably worse, the prospect that the girl you had despised since middle wasnât actually the devil reincarnate you imagined her to be.
After you got home and had finished taking your shower, you laid down in your bed, sinking into the mattress. For the first time that day, you felt like you could finally decompress. But before the silence could give you enough space to reflect on everything, you received a face time call from your best friends Dina and Leah.
âHey, babe!â Dina exclaimed as you picked up, âLeah wants to know if you can come to this party.â
âYeah, Jordanâs parents are out of town on some work trip or whatever, so heâs gonna invite a bunch of people over tomorrow night. You should come!â
âOh, I donât knowâŚâ you hesitated, playing with the hem of your satin pink pajamas. With your break up being so fresh, you didnât know if going out would be the best idea. Sure, you werenât going to be alone since you had Dina and Leah, and Jordan was Leahâs long term boyfriend, so it wouldnât be like you were somewhere unfamiliar. But, still, you couldnât help but feel like you wouldnât be able to fully enjoy it.
âCâmonnn, itâll be so fun!â Dina pleaded.
Leah pouted, âYou usually love going to parties, whatâs wrong?â
âWell, itâs just that since I broke up with Abbyââ
âHold on,â Dina interrupted, âyou actually broke up with Abby?â
âYeahâŚâ
âAs you should,â Leah said, âYou deserve so much better.â
You chuckled, but there was no amusement in your voice, âI know.â
âWeâre always here for you if you need to talk,â Dina reminded you.
âThank you guys,â you said, smiling softly, truly grateful your friendsâ support.
âDonât even worry about it, girl,â Leah chimed in again, âAbby downgraded anyways. Cat canât dress for shit and those micro bangs look like she cut them in the dark with craft scissors. Not to mention that sheâs Ellieâs ex-girlfriend.â
Your heart dropped, âCat is Ellieâs ex-girlfriend?âÂ
âYeahâyou didnât know? They had, like, a really messy break up last year. Something about Ellie being too obsessive and Cat cheating on her with like some older guy at her job so Ellie stole Catâs car for revenge on some Grand Theft Auto shit.â
Leahâs eyebrows twisted as she recalled the rest of the story.
âThen she recited this really cringy poem to her English class she apparently wrote about Cat. Somehow the president of Mozambique was involved too, but I donât remember.âÂ
âOh my Godâdid all that really happen?â
âYeah!â Leah claimed, âWell thatâs just what I heard. Iâm sure some of it has to be embellishment of the truth or whateverâBut, anyways, yeah. Everybody knows that they used to date.â
You were sure Leah was just regurgitating a bunch of bullshitâyou loved her, but Leah was involved in so much shit talking that you began to suspect that her brain had started melting.
Despite that, through Leahâs rambling, you did recall something about Ellie being in love and falling out with another girl in your guysâ grade.
Your heart sunk a little at the thought of Catâs relationship with Ellie, a feeling settling inside you somewhere between disgust and devastation. You just brushed it off, though, not understanding what it meant and not being able to unpack it even if you did.
âDonât worry about Abby and Cat,â Dina comforted, âYou should still come to the party, itâll help you get your mind off her.â
âIâm still not sureâŚâ
âCâmon,â Leah pleaded, âWeâll have so much fun, youâll completely forget all about her!â
You sighed, âFine.â
âYes!â Dina grinned.
âGreat!â Leah exclaimed, âIâll probably go to his house first to help set up, then I can go pick you guys up.â
âAlright,â you said, âDina, is it okay if I go to your house after school tomorrow to get ready?â
âOf course, babe,â Dina agreed.
âThank you!â Suddenly, you yawned, a wave of exhaustion crashing over you, âIâm getting pretty tired. Iâm gonna go to sleep, Iâll see you guys tomorrow.â
Almost immediately after ending the call, sleep consumed you. Which, in hindsight, you were grateful for, knowing that if you had stayed up any longer, your overthinking would latch onto you and keep you up for the rest of the night.
After getting home from school the next day, you were having second thoughts about the party. You were utterly exhausted, part of you just wanting to lay in your bed and eat ice cream while wallowing in the hollow aftermath of your break up.
Fortunately for you, your best friend Dina was determined to help you escape the claws of your own self-pity. Confident that the perfect antidote for your heartbreak was a night of going out, she was there at your house at 5pm sharp to help you grab your outfit and makeup and take you back to her house to get ready and pregame.
Though you seriously doubted how effective partying would be for curing your sadness, you trusted your best friend. After all, she knew you better than anyone, and you did love getting dolled up and tipsy at some rich strangerâs house after a long week.
After a diligent half hour of makeup and careful outfit deliberation, you stood in front of Dinaâs floor length mirror and inspected the figure reflected back at you. You truly felt beautiful, adorning a skintight cheetah print tank top, cleavage on display, with a black mini skirt draping over your hips. The fishnets and black pumps you put on tied your look together. Bright strands of hair tinsel glittered when caught in the lights while the charcoal tightlining of your waterlines allowed the color of your eyes to pop out more than ever before.
âHoly shit, you look hot,â Dina remarked, her voice pulling you out of your own head. You only laughed shyly in response.Â
âAbby must be a fucking idiot. She has no idea what sheâs missing out on right now.â
Upon glancing over your face, she immediately picked up on the sadness engrained into your features.
âHey, donât be sad, okay?â Dina comforted you as she placed her hand on your shoulder, âYou deserve way better than Abby anyways. If sheâs a cheater, it was never gonna work out anyways. You practically dodged a bullet. Youâre hot, funny, hardworking, and actually really good at math.â
Dina softened her voice while kneeling down in front of you, âYouâll find another girl to love, and sheâll never take for granted how lucky she is to have you.â
âDo you really mean that?â you asked, throat tight as tears pooled at the bottom of your eyes, threatening to spill over.
âOf course I do. Besides, weâre gonna have so much fun tonight, youâll forget Abby even exists,â she brushed your cheek, collecting a rogue tear that had dripped down from your eye on her thumb, âNow cheer up before you mess up your makeup.â She tousled your hair before pulling out her phone, âLeah should be in here like five minutes to pick us up, you ready?â
You nodded, looking back at your reflection one last time, reapplying your favorite cherry-flavored lip-gloss for good luck. You really hoped Dina was right. You didnât want to think about Abby anymore, and you sure as hell did not want to think about whatever couple shit she could be doing with that Cat girl.
Tonight, you just wanted to have a good time. You wanted to enjoy being young, single, and hotâmaybe get a little bit tipsy, and (most importantly) get Abby off of your mind.Â
Despite your wishes, it seemed fate had other plans for you.
As soon as you got to the party, Dina and Leah spotted someone they had met at a concert they attended a few weeks ago. Promising them that you would be okay by yourself, you decided to slip away from them to grab a drink while they caught up with their friend.Â
Once acquiring your drink, you slipped into the crowd and observed the mass of partiers. To your devastation, in the center of the room stood no other than your ex-girlfriend: Abigail Anderson, shamelessly making out with the same girl she had cheated on you with underneath the partyâs violet luminescence with no regard for the presence of other people around. Her tongue was stuck so far down Catâs throat it was as if she was trying to reach the depths of her soul through her mouth.
You stared at the two of them, disgust rising and settling deep inside your gut.
âTheyâre so disgusting,â you muttered, not even realizing that you were saying your thoughts out loud.
âYeah. They make me want to throw up,â a voice next to you sneered.Â
You flinched, not expecting another voice to boom so close and unexpectedly near your ear, âWhat the fuck?!âÂ
The voice came from no other than Ellie Williams, who paid no mind to your jumpiness as she continued talking shit, âYâknow, never would I ever imagine the two of them together."
You scoffed, piling onto Ellieâs thoughts in agreement, âYeah, because they donât look good together. Besides, I donât understand why they feel the need to practically eat each other alive in front of everybody.âÂ
âExactly,â Ellie chuckled, âItâs just gross.â
Silence settled between the two of you for just a second longer than what felt comfortable.
You shifted your feet as you worked up the courage to ask her the question that had been lingering in your mind since last night.
âEllie?â
She returned her head and her attention back to you, âYeah?â
âYesterday, when I told you about what happened between me and Abby,â you paused for a moment, collecting yourself, âWhy didnât you tell me that Cat was your ex-girlfriend?â
You watched the muscles of Ellieâs throat flex and relax slowly as she swallowed, jaw tensing, âWe were talking about you, what happened between me and Cat didnât matter.â
âOh, okay,â you replied, suddenly shy.
After a moment, Ellie spoke up again, âBut, yâknow, about that⌠I canât help but thinkâŚâ
âThink what?â
She turned her body fully towards you, engaging eye contact, âDo you really think that theyâre just making out in front of everybody because they just find each other so irresistible?â
You furrowed your brows, âWhat the hell are you trying to imply?âÂ
Ellie smirked, mischief suddenly creeping across her expression, âIâm saying that theyâre obviously trying to make us jealous. Donât you see it?â
Swishing the drink in your hand absentmindedly, you doubted her theory, âI donât know, Ellie. What if they just like each other? I doubt they thought about it that deeply.â
Ellie rolled her eyes in response, âYou donât have to believe me, but Iâm right.âÂ
Silence lingered between the two of you as Ellie turned her gaze away from you. As her gentle features got caught in the violet glow reflecting off the silver mirror ball, you couldnât help but notice that she was actually quite beautiful.
Your eyes locked back onto the couple, who was now grinding on each other to the rhythm of whatever shitty bass-boosted house song was blasting from the speakers.
âThey make me fucking sick,â you muttered.
Ellie smirked as your gaze met with hers again, âWell, Iâm telling you, theyâre just trying to get under our skin, and thereâs only one way we can get them back.â
âNow what the actual fuck are you trying to say?â
As she lowered her voice, Ellie leaned in so close that you could feel the warmth in her breath and smell the liquor she had downed ten minutes ago.
âI think you already know what Iâm trying to say, princess.â
For a moment, you were stunned, heat rising in your cheeks at the proximity.
Was she seriously trying to imply that you two should kiss in an attempt to get back at Cat and Abby?
As appealing as it sounded to rile Abby up and make her jealous, the idea of kissing Ellie sounded fucking insane to you. She might've comforted you after your break up yesterday, and the two of you might be currently bonding over your exes getting together in a fling that nobody could have ever predictedâbut none of that made you forget the years of resentment that had festered between you both until this week.
Besides, she was still a stoned out loser. What would people think of you if they saw you kiss her?
Breaking out of the trance you were in, you shook your head, pushing her off of you, âCâmon, Ellie. Thatâs fucking crazy and you know it.â
She just shrugged in response, âMaybe, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't do it anyways."
"If you change your mind, I'll still be here," she practically breathed into your ear, âJust saying, it would really piss Abby off.â
It was true, Abby hated Ellie as much as you did. Well, nearly as much as you did. Ellie made you want to fucking rip your hair out of your scalp and strangle her with it. Well, at least she used to. Everything seemed to be confusing lately.
You brushed Ellie off and made your way through the crowd, finding Leah and Jordan by a wall, cuddling up and laughing. The love that radiated off of them mocked you in your post-breakup state, reminding you of Abby and enraging you all over again.
You stomped up to the couple, âJordan, why the fuck did you invite Abby?â
âWait, sheâs here?â Leah said, beginning to glance over the crowd.
âIâm so confused,â Jordan said, âIsnât she your girlfriend? I thought you would want her to be here.â
You rolled your eyes, âLook at what sheâs doing right now.â
Jordan scanned the crowd and gasped when he saw Abby, âIs she making out with another girl?â
âYes,â you groaned, âWeâre not together anymore because sheâs a fucking cheater.â
As you began to turn away, Leah tugged on your forearm, pulling you back.
âIâm so sorry,â she apologized, âI shouldâve told him not to invite her, I had no idea she would even come.â
âItâs okay, Leah. Donât worry about it. Thereâs nothing we can do about it now. Iâm just pissed.â
Pulling away from her, you continued walking towards the bar.
You downed a cup of suspicious fruit punch and mentally prayed to God that it wasnât laced with anything other than cheap liquor.
With the bitter taste of alcohol settling in your throat, you leaned back against the wall, your eyes scrutinizing the room of partiers once more.
Sure enough, Abby and Cat were still there in the center of the room, grinding and kissing on one other.
You thought you were fine. You thought you could handle it. Not everything is meant to last and people grow apart and all that other bullshit about letting go.
But then you saw Abbyâs hands slide over Catâs body.
Abbyâs fingertips caressed the sensitive muscle of Catâs abdomen, making her gasp and look back at your ex-girlfriend, the two closing the gap with a messy kiss.
How fucking dare she.
It broke you to see Abby touch another girl with the same hands, the same intensity, the same purpose that she had touched your body with only a week prior.
That was your final straw.
With liquid courage burning through your veins, you thought back to Ellieâs proposition.
Without giving yourself a chance to have second thoughts, you pushed through the crowd.
Sure enough, she was still there in the party, just as she said she would be, now talking to a few other losers that you (quite honestly) didnât care enough to learn the names of.
All you had to do was call out her name once, and she turned back towards you, your gaze meeting hers immediately.
If you were going to back down, this was your final chance to do so.
But you didnât back down.
Instead, you wrapped your arms around her neck, pulling her into a warm kiss.
Ellie responded to you immediately, pressing your body into hers through her hold on your hips.
After a few seconds, you were the first to pull away from the kiss, gasping for air. Ellie didnât seem satisfied with that, though, soon pulling you back in for more, this time much more confident and intense as you both grew more familiar with the otherâs body.
Ellie licked across your bottom lip as a request for entrance, to which you accepted, allowing her to deepen the kiss.
Once you both had no other choice but to break away for air, you still held Ellie close, resting your head against her shoulder as you attempted to recollect yourself.
As the adrenaline crash hit you, you began to undergo the full consequences of the shots you took at Dinaâs house in combination with whatever shit was in those red solo cups.
Everything sounded like it was underwater. You couldnât even see the crowds of your peers staring and whispering as everything blurred together in your vision.
Each light was blinding. Each noise was deafening.
Your stomach turned like it was working against its natural movement, trying to force out something you desperately did not want to come out right now.
You leaned against Ellie to prevent yourself from falling over as your limbs shook they would soon stop working entirely.
âEllie, I donât feel so good.â you muttered into her ear. âCan you take me home?â
âYeah, yeah. Just hold on to me.â Ellie agreed, her voice still breathy from the kiss.
She guided you out of the party with her hand on the small of your back. You knew people were talking about you, but you were too dazed from the kiss and your inebriation to care.
Once outside, Ellie unlocked her car and helped you into the passenger seat before walking around and climbing into the driverâs seat.
âEllieeee?â you drawled out her name.
âYeah?â she turned towards you, genuine concern in her eyes, âDo you need anything?â
âCan I have your jacket? âM so cold.â
Ellie threw her jacket into your lap before turning on the car.
You pulled the leather over your shoulders, immediately finding comfort in the scent of smoke and musky cologne that radiated off her jacket.
Fortunately, Ellie remembered your address from taking you home yesterday, so it didnât take long for the two of you to take off after settling into the car.
After Ellie started driving, you quickly accustomed to the gentle hum of the car beating against the road, finding comfort in it's rhythm.
Hearing your phone blow up with notifications, you clumsily unlocked your phone. Seeing that all the texts came from your group chat with Dina and Leah, you tapped on your screen to read what they were saying.
In your drunken state, the blue and white hazes from your phone all blended into one, forcing you to have to squint your eyes to make out what the texts said.
leah baby - 11:32 PM
"lol tell me why i just saw cat and abby walking out the party"
"they seemed like they were fighting too"
wifey dina <3 - 11:35 PM
ây/n.â
"where the fuck are you?"
leah baby - 11:36 PM
âomgâ
"y/n, why are people saying that you and ellie kissed?"
"What are you looking at?" Ellie asks.
"Oh, my friends are just texting me."
You moved to reply to your concerned friends, but your fingers felt like jelly. Despite it feeling almost impossible to type back a coherent response, you carried through.
you - 11:38 PM
"m oksy guys"
"ellie s takinf me homd"
You shut your phone off and relaxed into your seat, resting your head against the window as you watched Ellie drive, her brow furrowed in focus.
After a minute or two, you finally decided to break the silence, âEllie?â
âMhm?â She met your gaze momentarily before returning her eyes to the road.
âWhat actually happened between you and Cat?â You thought back to your conversation with Leah yesterday, giggling at the absurdity of her story, âLeah said that she cheated on you with some old man and you stole her car or some shit.â
âThat did not happen,â Ellie sounded a bit defensive at first, but couldnât help the smile that adorned her face upon hearing the gentle melody of your soft laughter.
âThen what did happen?â You asked, looking up at her with big doe eyes from your slouched sitting position.
Ellie sighed, "Well, I met her in this art class I was taking sophomore year. I thought she was really cool... and pretty," Ellie let out a short, breathy laughter as she recalled what was now just a distant memory to her. "We had a lot in common, too, so we became friends pretty quickly."
"One day we were chilling in her car listening to Pierce the Veil or whatever shit was on our playlist," Ellie paused like it still hurt her to remember, "Then she leaned in and kissed me."
"Then what happened?" You asked, fully engaged.
"Well, we started datingâand at first it was good, like really good. I mean, she was my first girlfriend since middle school, so it wasn't like I had a lot to compare it to, but still."
Ellie bit her lip for a moment, lost in thought, "Then, I guess she got tired of me. 'Said I was getting too clingy or something, started acting distant... then she cut things off."
"I'm so sorry, Ellie," you said softly, fully sympathizing with her and relating to what she went through through your own break up.
She shook her head, "It's fine. I'm over it now; it just hurts to think about."
You leaned in and placed your hand on her forearm, rubbing circles into her skin in an attempt to comfort her, "Still, nobody deserves to be treated like that."
Your heart felt like it was being squeezed a little as you witnessed the soft smile that graced on Ellie's face. It may have been there for just a second, but that was enough for you.
Ellie cleared her throat as the car came to a stop, "We're here."
You looked out the window and, truth be told, there stood your family's house illuminated under the pale moonlight.
Ellie got out the car and walked over to your side, opening the door for you and helping you get out while holding your hand.
Still inebriated, you had to lean onto Ellie as you walked up towards your house.
"Fuck, Ellie," you giggled, "I left my keys on my nightstand. I'm gonna have to crawl through my window."
Ellie laughed at you, "Are you fucking serious? How do you forget your keys?"
"Oh my God, shut up!" you laughed along with Ellie. "Dina was rushing me out the door, okay?"
"Okay, but now seriously how the fuck are we going to get up to your window?"
"Chill out, I live on the first floor. It's right there."
Once reaching the outside of your bedroom, you leaned against the vinyl panels of your house while staring at the flexing of Ellie's muscles as she pushed open your window.
You climbed through the window first, landing on the floor with a thud due to your drunken lack of coordination.
Ellie followed, climbing into your bedroom next.
"Ellie, what are you doing?" you asked, not expecting her to actually come in.
She fidgeted with her hands, suddenly a bit shy, "I just wanted to make sure that you were going to be okay before I left."
Upon seeing you struggle to get your heels off, Ellie kneeled down and helped you unfasten all the straps, tossing the shoes into a corner of your room once complete.
Stumbling over to your dresser, you pulled out a change of clothes so you could finally get out of your itchy bra and tight clothes.
"Ellie, can you please turn around while I change?" you asked.
"Oh, rightâsure! I mean, yeah, of course I can," she spun around, cheeks flushed completely red. You thought it was adorable how easy it was to make her nervous and get her wrapped around your finger.
Sometimes Ellie could seem so tough, her confidence radiating in a way that appeared so effortless to those around her. Underneath her sharp tongue and edgy demeanor, though, she was just an awkward girl that got shy when you went soft on her.
Once slipping out of your party outfit and throwing on the Fleetwood Mac shirt you religiously wore to bed once a week and a striped pair of pajama pants, you told Ellie she could look again.
The alcohol debilitated your senses once more as you stumbled on your way towards your bed, making Ellie rush over and hold your waist as she helped you climb into your sheets.
As you let the comforting familiarity of your mattress embrace you whole, you realized how fucking tired you actually were.
âHow about we exchange numbers?â she asked, âThat way you can text me if you need anything.â
âMmmm,â you groaned in exhaustion. âI donât wanna get up, Iâll just tell you mine.â
You recited your phone number out to her as she diligently tapped it into her phone to save it.
âEllie?â you called out to her, your voice low and soft as you were actively trying and failing to fight off sleep.
âYes?â
âI think youâre really sweet.â you confessed.
âThanks,â her face turned red from your flattery, âI think youâre really drunk right now.â
You hummed, your eyes fluttering shut as you surrendered to sleep, âThank you for taking care of me.â
âOf course, itâs the right thing to do.â
Before climbing out your window to return to her car, Ellie took a minute to admire you in your unconscious state. She truly believed you looked beautiful like this, curling into yourself as you buried your head deeper into your pillow. You looked more than precious with your soft lashes pressed gently against each other and your pouty lips agape. Ellie wondered if this is what angels looked like in flesh.
She shook her head, breaking herself out of her thoughts. No, she couldnât think of you in that way.
She forced herself to rip her gaze away from you and instead head back into the night. Regardless, no matter how much she tried to tell herself that any proximity between the two of you was strictly a product of random circumstance and a desire for vengeance, the gross pink thing beating between her ribs argued otherwise.
You woke up the next day with a pounding headache that never ceased, a sour taste in your mouth, and a hot sweat that made your clothes stick to your skin. You covered your eyes with your hands in an attempt to hide from the sun, whose blinding light left black and blue dots permeating your vision.
Groaning, you pulled your phone off your nightstand.
The time on it read 1:52 PM. You didn't think you stayed at the party for that long, so you must have just been so tired after the week you had that you slept for over twelve hours.
The time wasn't what shocked you the most, though. In fact, the part that made your heart sink was the amount of texts that had blown up your inbox over night.
wifey dina <3 - 11:39 PM
âyou're in a car with ellie?"
"are you fucking serious, y/n?"
leah baby - 11:42 PM
âholy shitâ
"so you actually kissed ellie?"
"wait, but i thought u guys hated each other?"
wifey dina <3 - 11:44 PM
âthey do."
"i don't know what she was thinking."
abigail. (cheating asshole) (DO NOT CALL) - 12:05 AM
âwhat the fuckâ
"did you seriously make out with ellie?"
"in front of everybody?"
"are you insane?"
"out of all the fucking people you kiss ellie?"
leah baby sent an attachment - 1:03 AM
leah baby - 1:03 AM
âsomeone posted a photo of you two kissing on their storyâ
(###)-###-#### - 8:22 AM
âhey, itâs ellieâ
"text me when ur awake"
You threw your phone across the room and rolled onto your side, placing your palms against your forehead as you groaned deep enough that it echoed across your bedroom walls.
What the fuck did you get yourself into?
a/n: i hope you guys enjoyed!!!! lmk if you want a part two. ngl i already started writing it so i hope you guys want it. lmk if you wanna be tagged!! đđ
