ALL MY POETRY | scaramouche x fem!reader-insert smau
synopsis: you, name ragnvindr, are a chronic overachiever. it’s not really your fault (debatable), but it’s not like anyone in school could tell! well, maybe because you were home-schooled in high school… but now you’re in university, where everyone is working hard, right? no one will be able to tell!
yeah, so, maybe it’s kinda obvious you’re an overachiever… but, who needs a social life or even a romantic life when academic excellence is right there?
tags: slow-burn; strangers to lovers; miscommunication; themes of burnout, grief, unhealthy coping mechanisms, and social anxiety; social media!au; modern!au; university!au; mostly fluff; hurt-comfort aspects; crack; do not pay attention to timestamps; ignore spelling errors i’m blind asf
MASTERLIST
☆ = written part
ACT 1: HOW TO FIT IN WITH THE CROWD
1. bro said loumein ☆
2. girl where tf is the library
3. save me a seat ☆
4. the boy from philosophy ☆
5. what the hell is positivism
6. big bro to the rescue !!
7. the tutoring committee
8. the girl from philosophy ☆
9. club fair
10. don’t feed my delusions ☆
11. doing too much
12. but it’s not enough
ACT 2: HOW TO SIT IN SILENCE
13. a realization ☆
14. you have a nice voice ☆
15. the life sim club
16. fitting in ☆
17. better than before
18. spill your guts ☆
19. an intervention ☆
20. the moon city ☆
ACT 3: HOW TO RECONCILE
21. more than just a name
22. birthday girl ☆
23. what’s up youtube?!
tbc…
AUTHOR’s NOTE
heyyyy… yes i wanted to write a scara smau fic omg sue me i know theres a lot !!! and that a uni-themed smau is not original !! but i’ve always loved smaus and i decided it was time i actually commit to one (rip my wattpad bllk smau maybe i’ll revise you one day)
anyway, name is based off of me irl and my genshin oc vala 🙂↕️🙂↕️ i study criminology irl, hence the focus on crim and socio-legal studies even tho name’s majors are forensics LMAOOO
vala, my oc, is diluc n kaeya’s little sister ! and i do yumeship her w scara oopsies. but yeahhhh i hope you guys enjoy all my poetryyyy
i got the title from the song all my poetry by cye, its a reallyyyy good song that i think perfectly encapsulates name’s overly anxious but romantic personality
oh and excuse any ooc dialogue or interactions i just got back into genshin after fontaine so. im a bit behind… not that any ooc stuff matters anyway bc its a modern au so its not like they would act the same as they do in game 😭😭
summary: you’re feeling optimistic about yourself now that you’ve joined the life sim club. you’re making friends, exploring a hobby, and not sobbing over your grades! you feel ready to take on that philosophy project now! but, wait, what even is the philosophy project?
you’ve been feeling lighter ever since you’ve joined the life sim club - like your days have more meaning than ruminating over your grades.
diluc ruffles your hair and tells you he’s proud of you. kaeya asks you to bring back more cookies after club meetings.
he is allowed to ask you to bake cookies any time he wants. does he know that? maybe you should let him know that.
but, even with your newfound will to live, you cannot find it within yourself to go to your philosophy class.
you’re in the academic centre, slumped over the front desk with a half-empty iced matcha next to you and croissant crumbs around your hands.
“hey, clean up your crumbs.” lumine sighs as she sits next to you. you begrudgingly listen, scooping the crumbs into a trash bin.
“don’t you have your philosophy class soon?” she asks.
“yeah…” you huff with a whine, “but i have this, like, partner project and i’m scared to go.”
“why, you don’t have a partner?”
“i do. he’s-“ you cut yourself off. you don’t like how wide her smile is, or the way she’s wiggling her eyebrows.
“stop- him being a guy is not why i’m scared!” that’s a lie - you know it is because your neck is burning and you can feel sweat gathering at your nape.
“mhmm, right,” she giggles, “whatever you say!”
you groan and bury your face in your hands.
“who even is your partner?”
“promise not to make a big deal out of it?” you warily look up at her. she wiggles her pinky, to which you immediately lock yours with hers.
“it’s scaramocuhe.”
“oh. my. ARCHONS.”
“you just said you wouldn’t make a big deal out of it!”
there’s nothing you can do to stop her maniac laughter, no matter how hard you shush her and tell her she’s going to get in trouble with lisa.
“that’s so cute! you’re nervous around him!” her laughter finally quiets, but now she’s teasing you and you don’t know which one you’d rather deal with anymore. “is it ‘cus he’s your type?”
“shut UP.”
she laughs again.
“no, but seriously, he’s a nice guy,” lumine sobers up, “i mean- i know you wouldn’t believe that if aether said it, but scara’s my friend too, and he’s nice. well, nice is a bit of a stretch. he isn’t mean for no reason!”
you cautiously stare at her.
“he’s not always cognizant of how his words come off to people, but he always says things with the right intentions.” she elaborates. “he’s got some stuff going on but he’s a good person! plus, from what i hear, he really likes you, so there’s nothing to worry about.”
her words echo in your brain, freezing you in place. he likes you? he really likes you? what does lumine mean by that?
she can practically see the cogs turning in your brain. “oh! uh- oh wow, amber just texted me- i really gotta go-“
she scoops up your matcha and departs with a quick kiss on the cheek.
“wait- what do you mean by that? where’d you hear that? lumine!” you scramble out of your chair.
she blows you one last kiss, “goodbye, my sweet wife!”
and, she’s out the door.
you’d chase her down if you weren’t on the clock right now. well, you could probably still chase her down anyway.
you slump back into your chair. it’s too late to chase her down now. you’ll just have to let those words simmer in your brain - which, maybe isn’t the best idea. how are you going to look him in the eyes today now that you know that?
your phone vibrates.
there’s no denying the race of your heart as you start to head to class.
why would lumine say that to you? that just made everything worse!
a stop by the bathroom can fix this. you just need to calm down and take a breath - maybe even freshen up a little.
if there’s one thing you like about the gurabad building, it has to be the washrooms. it’s the least used building in the old akademiya area for its architecture, but its lecture halls and washrooms are always in pristine condition. plus, the washrooms are always empty.
you splash your face with cool water from the sink. leaning onto the sink’s edge, you stare at yourself in the mirror. you’re feel less flushed now, thanks to the water, but archons do you look tired. your skin is all washed out and a little dry from lack of care, and your eye bags could practically be your school bag at this point.
you never really did have to worry about your appearance when you were homeschooled, and you never really thought you’d ever have to.
maybe you should ask lisa about makeup.
you’re five minutes late to class.
you’re getting too relaxed, or maybe you’re overthinking things. whatever it is, it’s made you late to class and you don’t like that.
heizou is easy to spot amongst the crowded lecture hall. he’s waving so enthusiastically at you, after all.
“what’s up, name!” he whisper-yells as soon as you’re near. your mouth scrunches up in a small smile.
“hi, heizou.” you whisper back, sliding into your seat next to scaramouche. scaramouche doesn’t react, much to your dismay - he’s stone-faced as he stares ahead at the professor.
right. you should be paying attention to the professor, not scaramouche.
“for those of you who weren’t here last class, i announced a partner project,” they say, “it’s worth 15% of your final grade, and yes, you absolutely need a partner. doing this project alone is not an option. if you cannot find a partner, talk to your ta.”
“now, this project officially starts this week and carries until the end of the semester. you and your partner will be preparing three things: an interview, an infographic, and a presentation. if you score 85% or above on the presentation portion, you will be invited to present your project at the spring open house for extra credits.”
you want to bash your head against the wall.
a presentation? you haven’t done that in over 6 years. and, to do one with scaramouche? the guy you can barely look in the eye because you think he’s too pretty?
you should just die now.
“name!” you jolt up from the desk. heizou reaches around scaramouche to tug at your sleeves.
“wanna partner up?” he’s smiling, eyes wide with hope. you hesitate.
“she’s with me already, idiot.” scaramouche pushes him away by the forehead.
“what! that’s not fair- when’d you even partner up with her?” heizou tries to flick him back on the forehead. scaramouche flips him off. “wh- she wasn’t even here last class?!”
“find your own partner.”
“ugh, i hate you!”
“i’m sorry.” you nervously mumble to heizou, but he easily brushes it off. still, you can’t help but ruminate.
sure, you weren’t too sure about heizou at first, but now you know he’s a good guy. he’s fun and easygoing, but mindful of your boundaries. you still don’t know much about scaramouche, aside from what you’ve been told. he’s very… callous, from what you’ve seen.
you spend the rest of the lecture nervously looking over at scaramouche between notes. he’s unmoving and seemingly uncaring of your flittering glances.
“man, so you’re really partnered up with scara?” venti asks you at the end of the lecture. he’s pouting. “i wanted to partner with you!”
“oh, well-“
“too bad.” scaramouche hovers behind you. you nearly flinch at the way he leans over your shoulder, chest grazing your back, just to flip him off.
“you’re only just saying that so you could have someone to leech off of.” kazuha hums. “i’m sure you and xiao can figure something out.”
“i wouldn’t leech off of name!” venti scoffs. he turns to you in a panic, “name, i would never do that to you-“
“you do that every week when you ask her for notes.” scaramouche sneers.
“you sneaky-“
you silently sit amongst them, adjusting your gaze to watch as the rest of the class filters out. you don’t really have anything else to do today, aside from your online labs. maybe… you should go home?
“hey.” you’re nudged out of your thoughts. something cold presses against your forehead, and you flinch as condensation drips down the slope of your nose.
scaramouche holds out a metal bottle to you. “give me your phone.”
curious, you take the bottle from him, and he takes your phone.
as he’s typing away, you cautiously unscrew the top. it’s not a bottle - it’s one of those fancy metal bottle insulators, you realize as you find a glass bottle inside.
it’s filled with iced matcha.
you take a small sip. it’s just the way you like it, with brown sugar syrup and honey.
“here.” he taps your phone against your head. “it’s my number.”
“oh… wait, what?”
“for the project.” he says simply, like it explains it all. well, it does explain it all, but that doesn’t stop you from being flabbergasted. “i have midterms this week, but i’ll be free on the weekend. that work for you?”
“um, sure.” you sputter out.
“cool.” he hums. and, then, he’s gone. he picks up his bag and nudges venti down the stairs. you stare as he leaves, paralyzed in your seat. condensation wets your palms, bringing you out of your trance. you nervously wipe your hands against your cardigan and pack up your belongings.
yeah, maybe you should go home. you’re feeling oddly feverish.
when you look up again, bag slung across your shoulder and matcha in your hands, he’s staring at you. his sharp, purple gaze pierces straight through you.
you freeze in place. the rest of the world blurs, shapeless figures surrounding you. you glance away, palms sweaty as you scratch at your nose. he’s still staring at you when you look back.
you offer a tiny wave.
he offers a smirk and a casual salute.
prev. | masterlist. | next.
AUTHOR’s NOTE
guys i got a job 😛😛😛 thats why this took a bit oopsies but anyway i love this job they let me do whatever i want so rn im basically getting paid to make this chapter
anywayss see u guys in the next one !! love u !!!!!!!
taglist (still open!) | if you’re user is bolded, i couldn’t tag you :(
context: When Housewardens tell the Prefect their struggles aren’t that serious, the words sting more than expected.
tags: angst, unintentional insults, GN!Reader, reader here is Yuu.
a/n: hai guys i finally wrote my exam🥳 (gonna retake it in three days) i know that i was supposed to post next month, but i found this in my drafts and so i thought, “why not post it now?”😛
RIDDLE ROSEHEARTS You were in the Heartslabyul rose garden after classes, helping Riddle prune the bushes as punishment for some minor rule you’d accidentally broken earlier. He watched your every move with that familiar strict expression, arms crossed tightly over his chest.
“Honestly, Y/N,” he said, voice sharp with impatience, “you’re being so careless with the thorns again. It’s like watching a child who can’t follow even the simplest instructions. No wonder you struggle with basic decorum sometimes. If you can’t do something as straightforward as this correctly, how do you expect to handle anything important?”
You froze mid-cut, the shears suddenly heavy in your hands. The words landed like a slap, in a way that only Riddle could make them. You weren’t one of his dorm members. You weren’t breaking Queen of Hearts rules on purpose. You were just trying to help. And he’d called you careless. Childish. Incompetent.
“…Right,” you muttered, setting the shears down carefully. Your voice came out quieter than you meant. “I’ll leave it to someone who can do it properly, then.” You turned and walked away without waiting for his response.
Riddle blinked, opening his mouth to call after you, but something in your tone made him pause. He shook his head and went back to work, telling himself he’d only been correcting you the way he corrected everyone. Rules were rules. Standards had to be maintained.
Later that evening, while sitting alone with his tea in the dorm lounge, the memory replayed. The way your face had fallen. The quiet hurt in your voice when you said you’d “leave it to someone who can do it properly.” His teacup froze halfway to his lips.
He hadn’t meant to sound so cruel. He’d grown up with a mother who corrected every tiny mistake with that same sharp tone — for his own good, as she always said. But you weren’t his mother’s perfect puppet. You were the person who stayed even when he overblotted, who laughed at his silly rules sometimes and still chose to spend time with him. And he’d spoken to you like you were just another rule-breaker who needed fixing.
Guilt twisted hard in his chest. Riddle set the cup down, hands trembling slightly. “I… I said something awful, didn’t I?” he whispered to the empty room. His face burned with shame. He would have to apologize properly, without any lectures and only with real words. He just hoped you’d still want to listen.
LEONA KINGSCHOLAR You’d found Leona in his usual spot in the botanical garden, sprawled under a tree after a long day. You were venting quietly about feeling overwhelmed — too many chores at Ramshackle, too much schoolwork, the constant pressure of being the only magicless student trying to keep up.
Leona didn’t even open his eyes fully, just shifted lazily with a scoff. “Tch. You’re always whining about the smallest things. Must be nice having that much free time to complain about every little inconvenience. Some of us actually have real problems we can’t just cry and mope about.”
The words hit like sandpaper. You went completely silent for a long moment, staring at the ground. Real problems. As if your struggles didn’t count because they weren’t wrapped in royal family drama or second-son resentment. As if you were just being dramatic.
You stood up slowly. “Okay,” you said, voice flat. “I’ll stop bothering you with my small, stupid problems then.” You turned and left without another word, fists clenched at your sides so he wouldn’t see them shake.
Leona cracked one eye open as you walked away, tail flicking once in mild annoyance. Whatever. Herbivores were always too sensitive. He rolled over and tried to go back to sleep.
But hours later, when the sun had set and he was still lying there unable to actually rest, your face kept flashing in his mind. The way your voice had gone flat. The way you’d called your own problems “stupid” like you were agreeing with him. Leona’s ears flattened against his head. He wasn’t wrong about having bigger issues — being overlooked his whole life, constantly compared to Farena, the weight of never being enough — but he’d thrown that in your face like your feelings were worthless. You were one of the few people who didn’t treat him like either a lazy prince or a threat. You actually stuck around. And he’d dismissed you like you were nothing.
“Damn it,” he growled under his breath, sitting up and running a hand through his hair. “I really messed that one up.” Apologizing wasn’t his style, but ignoring the guilt felt worse. He’d have to find you and fix it, even if it meant admitting he’d been a jerk.
AZUL ASHENGROTTO You had gone to the Mostro Lounge after hours, hoping for some advice from Azul on handling a tricky negotiation with a group of students who kept trying to take advantage of you. He listened politely at first, adjusting his glasses with that calm, professional smile.
“Well,” he said smoothly, “a kind soul like you is quite an easy target in a place like this, isn’t it? People will take advantage if you keep showing that much softness and trust. Perhaps you should consider being a bit more calculated. Like me. Otherwise, you’ll keep ending up in these unfortunate situations.”
It sounded helpful on the surface, classic Azul business advice. But the way he said it made your stomach drop. Easy target. Like your kindness was a flaw, a weakness that made you lesser. Like you needed to become more like him — cold, scheming, always looking for an angle — to be worthy of respect.
You forced a small, tight laugh that didn’t reach your eyes. “Yeah… maybe I should. Thanks for the advice.” You made an excuse about being tired and left the Lounge earlier than planned, walking back to Ramshackle with your arms wrapped around yourself.
Azul went back to reviewing contracts, satisfied he’d given sound guidance. After all, he knew how this school worked. Kindness got exploited. He’d learned that the hard way.
But late that night, while sitting alone in his room with the glowing aquarium lights, the memory resurfaced. The way you’d withdrawn. The hurt hidden behind that fake laugh. Azul’s pen stopped moving. He had meant it as practical advice, born from his own painful past — the bullying, the insecurity about his octopus form, the need to become untouchable through contracts and cleverness. But to you, it had probably sounded like he was calling you naïve, weak, and gullible. Like your genuine kindness was something embarrassing that needed fixing. His chest felt uncomfortably tight. For someone who prided himself on precise wording and reading people, he had completely miscalculated this time. You weren’t a client to be molded into something more “efficient.” You were important to him. And he had made you feel small.
Azul removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes. “How careless of me…” he murmured. He would need to apologize — properly, without contracts or loopholes. He just hoped you’d give him the chance.
KALIM AL-ASIM You were sitting with Kalim on the balcony of Scarabia after a long day. The desert wind was warm, and colorful lanterns floated lazily overhead thanks to his magic. You had been opening up about feeling overwhelmed and emotionally drained — the constant pressure of being the Prefect, missing home, and how everything sometimes felt too heavy.
Kalim listened with his usual bright, attentive smile, nodding along. When you finished, he reached over and gently patted your head, laughing cheerfully. “Aww, Y/N, you’re like a little kitten! No wonder you’re so sensitive about everything. It’s really cute, though! Don’t worry so much — I’ll protect you from all the big bad stuff. We can just throw a party and forget about it!”
The words landed with unexpected weight. “Cute.” “Like a little kitten.” “Sensitive.” It made your feelings sound like something small and adorable instead of real and valid. You forced a weak smile, but it didn’t reach your eyes. “Yeah… cute. Got it.” You stood up quietly. “I think I’m gonna go inside. Alone.” You walked back inside before he could reply, leaving Kalim blinking in confusion on the balcony.
Kalim tilted his head, still smiling at first. “Huh? Did I say something weird?” He shrugged it off and went back to the party, assuming you’d feel better after some rest. After all, parties and positivity always fixed things in his experience.
But later that night, while lying in his lavish bed surrounded by silk pillows, the conversation replayed in his head. The way your smile had faltered. The quiet way you’d said “Got it” before leaving. Kalim’s cheerful expression slowly faded. He sat up, hugging his knees. He hadn’t meant to dismiss you. He really thought comparing you to a kitten was endearing — soft, innocent, something worth protecting. But now he realized how it sounded: like your struggles were just overreactions, something to pat on the head and cheer up with a party. His whole life, people had smiled through problems around him. Jamil handled everything so Kalim could stay happy. He was so used to that dynamic that he sometimes forgot other people’s pain wasn’t just something to brighten up.
“Oh no…” he whispered, face falling. “I didn’t mean it like that at all. I just thought…” his voice trailed off and he remained silent for a few minutes. “I hurt them, didn’t I?” Guilt twisted in his stomach. He had survived assassination attempts and kidnappings by smiling through fear, but that didn’t mean he could expect you to do the same. He would find you tomorrow and apologize properly, without making any party, only with his honest words. He hoped you’d still want to talk to him.
VIL SCHOENHEIT You had spent the afternoon in the Pomefiore lounge, excitedly showing Vil an outfit you had put together yourself. You were proud of the effort — mixing pieces to suit your style while trying to look put-together for once. Vil looked you up and down with his usual critical eye, one elegant brow raised.
“Hm. It’s… passable, I suppose,” he said, voice smooth but laced with disappointment. “But really, Y/N, with that much effort you still look rather plain. True beauty requires constant, dedicated work. You can’t expect noticeable results if you only try halfway. It’s a shame, honestly — you have potential, but you seem content with mediocrity.”
The words stung sharper than you expected. “Plain.” “Halfway.” “Mediocrity.” You had tried. You had really tried. And he had reduced your sincere effort to something disappointing and insufficient. You swallowed hard, forcing your voice to stay steady. “I see. Thanks for the honesty, Vil.” You grabbed your things quickly. “I’ll… work on it later.” You left the lounge without waiting for more feedback, chest tight as you headed back to Ramshackle.
Vil watched you go with a small sigh, already turning back to the mirror to fix his hair. He had only been honest, pushing you the same rigorous way he pushed himself and his dorm members. Standards had to be maintained if you wanted to shine.
But hours later, while applying his nightly serum in front of the vanity, Vil paused. Your expression kept flashing in his mind — the brief flash of hurt you tried to hide, the way your shoulders had dropped. He set the bottle down slowly.
He had meant it as constructive criticism, born from his own relentless pursuit of perfection and the harsh industry he grew up in. But to you, it probably sounded like he was calling your genuine effort worthless. Like you were plain and lazy for not meeting his impossible standards. Vil’s perfect posture slumped slightly as regret settled in. He prided himself on elegance and poise, yet he had been careless with someone who mattered to him. Someone who didn’t live under the same spotlight he did.
“How unbecoming of me,” he murmured to his reflection. He would apologize tomorrow, with genuine acknowledgment of your effort. He hoped you would give him the chance to make it right.
IDIA SHROUD You were in Idia’s room, excited after finally beating a tough boss in a game you’d been practicing for weeks. You showed him the victory screen, grinning. “Look! I actually cleared it on my own this time!”
Idia glanced at your screen and let out a short snort, still focused on his own multiple monitors. “Whoa, you actually cleared it? Nice… for a casual player, I guess. I mean, it only took you like forever. Some of us could’ve done it in one try, but hey — participation trophy, right? Good job on not rage-quitting, at least.”
The casual gamer trash-talk landed differently when it came from him. “Casual.” “Forever.” “Participation trophy.” It made your accomplishment feel small and pathetic instead of something to celebrate. You closed the game quietly. “Yeah… whatever.” Your voice came out flatter than you intended. “I’ll head out. See you later.” You left his room without the usual teasing goodbye, the door clicking shut behind you.
Idia blinked at the now-empty spot where you’d been sitting, then shrugged and went back to his raid. “Weird… are they upset or something?” He figured you were just tired and kept playing.
But much later, while waiting for a respawn screen in his own game, Idia’s mind wandered back to the conversation. Your flat tone. The way you’d shut the game without showing him the rest of the run. The hurt hidden under that “whatever.” His fingers froze on the keyboard.
He hadn’t meant to sound that condescending — it was just his default way of talking, the same trash talk he used in every online lobby. But you weren’t some random noob. You were the one person who came to his room, tolerated his weird hobbies, and actually tried to share his interests. And he had dismissed your hard-earned win like it was nothing. Like you were slow and mediocre for being proud of it.
“Crap…” Idia muttered, pulling his hood lower over his face as embarrassment and guilt hit at once. “I really said that out loud? They probably think I’m the biggest asshole now.” His social battery was already low, but ignoring this felt worse. He would have to message you or find you tomorrow, even if it meant stepping out of his comfort zone.
MALLEUS DRACONIA The two of you were walking together through the quiet night gardens behind Diasomnia. Moonlight filtered through the ancient trees, casting long shadows from Malleus’s tall figure. You had been confiding in him about feeling small and overwhelmed lately — how it sometimes seemed like everyone around you was so powerful, so capable with magic, while you were just… you. Magicless fragile human. Always trying to catch up in a world that wasn’t built for someone like you.
Malleus listened with his usual calm, elegant poise, head slightly tilted as he gazed at the stars. When you finished speaking, a faint, distant smile curved his lips. “Fufu… it is rather charming how fragile mortals can be,” he said softly, his deep voice carrying through the cool night air like distant thunder. “You worry over such trivial things, Child of Man. In the grand scheme of centuries, your concerns are quite fleeting, aren’t they? Like morning dew that vanishes with the first light.”
The words settled over you heavily. “Charming.” “Fragile.” “Trivial.” “Fleeting.” He hadn’t raised his voice, but the gentle, almost fond tone made it worse — as if your struggles were cute little quirks of a short-lived human, not real pain worth taking seriously. You felt dismissed, belittled by someone whose perspective spanned hundreds of years. Someone you had trusted with your insecurities.
You swallowed hard, forcing your expression to stay neutral. “Yeah… fleeting. I guess that’s one way to look at it.” Your voice came out quieter than usual. “I’m a bit tired. I’ll head back to Ramshackle now.” You turned and walked away before he could respond, arms wrapped around yourself against the sudden chill that had nothing to do with the night air.
Malleus remained where he stood, blinking slowly at your retreating figure. He had expected perhaps a small laugh or continued conversation. Instead, you had withdrawn so abruptly. He tilted his head the other way, murmuring to himself, “How curious…” and continued his solitary walk, assuming mortals sometimes needed time alone with their fleeting emotions.
But later that night, as he stood alone on the highest balcony of Diasomnia overlooking the sleeping campus, the memory refused to fade. The way your shoulders had tensed. The quiet hurt in your voice when you echoed “fleeting” back at him before leaving. Malleus’s clawed fingers tightened slightly on the stone railing.
He had spoken from century of experience. To him, human worries truly did feel small and temporary compared to the vastness of time. But he had forgotten, in that moment, that those “trivial” feelings were everything to you. That you had trusted him enough to share your vulnerability, and he had responded by gently patting your head from atop his immortal mountain. He had made your very real struggles sound insignificant simply because they would not last as long as he would.
Regret settled heavily over him, colder than any gargoyle’s stone. “I have hurt them…” he said aloud to the empty night, voice low and laced with genuine sorrow. “Without even realizing the weight of my words.” For someone feared as the Prince of Thorns, capable of leveling landscapes with a flick of his hand, the idea that he could wound someone so deeply with mere speech was humbling.
He would seek you out tomorrow and apologize with honest acknowledgment. He hoped you would still allow him to stand by your side.
ramshackle's new prefect has a secret. she's a girl. and nobody can know. so of course, somebody is going to know eventually.
Waking up stuck inside of a coffin in a whole new, unfamiliar world wasn’t exactly something you had planned ahead for. How does one exactly pack a suitcase for a one way trip by blunt force horse drawn carriage trauma? And if that wasn’t already worth all of your time to worry about, the place you woke up in, with nothing on you but the clothes on your back and a cellphone with no reception, wasn’t even co-ed. This was blatantly obvious the second Crowley had dragged you by the arm back to the Hall of Mirrors. Not a woman in sight. There wasn’t even a single woman on staff which frankly, the more you learn about the history of Night Raven College, seems awfully sexist with how many of its founders were women. Sure, some of your fellow students were more stunning than any girl you had ever laid eyes on, but they still very much identified as men.
Which leads you to a problem.
You are a woman.
And it never really hit you the first day or two. You were much too worried about keeping up with all the information thrust into your arms to worry about the possibilities. You needed to wrangle Grim into somehow behaving for longer than five minutes and the ghosts needed to be reasoned with to share their living space! Not to mention an almost immediately broken chandelier, one hundred dirty windows, and a healthy dose of trial by Friendship. It was hectic! Crowley needed to fix this mistake and send you back home
It wasn’t until day three, the first day you had actually had a decent night’s sleep, that you came to a horrible realization. You were a woman. Stuck in a new world. With no money. Surrounded by Men.
What were you going to do about a change of clothes? How were you going to wash your underwear? What were you going to do about your period?? You clenched at your lower stomach as a warning rumble began wrecking your insides. This was Bad.
“Hey, henchhuman. You’re looking awfully pale.” You felt a soft paw slap against your cheek as you paid it no mind, your gaze glassy and far away, “Don’t tell me ya got sick!”
You bit your lip, “I think I’m going to be.”
Mind racing, you fell back against your pillow. You breathed out, deep and long. Your chest visibly rises and falls with each exhale. You counted. If your memory was correct, you had around twenty days before you started your period. Give or take. You reached your hands up and pressed your palms against your eyes hard enough until you saw stars. This was going to be rough… but you could do it. Crowley said he’d pay you for your work. Maybe you could sneak into town on a school day and hope and pray it wouldn’t be a long trip. Silently, you cursed the women of the Seven for not making this school co-ed.
But life goes on, regardless. You had found ways to make do. You are a survivor! And after much digging, you were able to secure a few hand me downs and, even if they were nibbled on by moths and not even your size, they were still better than nothing and the ghosts were apologetic enough for their rambunctious behavior in the beginning that they were able to secure you some dish soap to go along with an old washboard and basin that was tucked away. You quietly thanked whoever previously lived here for leaving those behind and with Grim’s help, you were able to jerryrig something close to a clothesline. Keeping it outside would have obviously been the better choice but you couldn’t take the chance of someone catching a glimpse of your feminine underwear flapping in the wind like some sort of polka dotted beacon.
And once again, whether you like it or not, life goes on. With the oversized clothing and some clever acting, you were able to pass as being a pretty enough boy that making friends with your local idiot duo was a piece of cake. They were nice enough and didn’t question any of your slip ups and only really made a comment on it when they noticed how pretty the other freshman from Pomefiore was and even then…
“Well, I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised that a Pomefiore student looks so girly.” Ace thought out loud before reaching for his fork and waving it over at you. “I mean, look at this guy. He might not be as feminine, but he’s still awfully pretty for a guy.”
Should… should you be offended?
Deuce hummed as if he hadn’t noticed before. You’re starting to feel offended?! “Now that you mention it, I guess?” He looked you up and down and, noticing the dark look on your face and mistaking it for you being embarrassed, blushed and hurriedly apologized, “Not that I think you’re not manly or anything! You’re super cool!”
“Uh, yeah. Thanks.” You grit your teeth, eyebrows narrowed as you stuck a fork full of lunch meat into your mouth. At least you were good at pretending to be man enough that these two idiots hadn’t noticed anything. You weren’t sure how convincing your disguise was considering that one Savanaclaw guy had given you a weird look that one time you stepped on his tail… but at least with these two dorks and the rest of Heartslabyul, you passed enough that nobody said anything.
Life has been pretty good. You have friends, get almost unlimited snacks courtesy of your connections with a certain baker, and get to party once a week with said friends at their dorm since, per Riddle, you were practically an honorary guest after his overblot. In fact, Riddle even gave you your own outfit! You very well couldn’t wear their uniform, he had reasoned, and it had been so long since someone had taken up this position, that he was practically beside himself in excitement at the thought of you donning the costume of the White Queen, the apparent sibling of the Queen of Hearts and local monarch. It was a lovely thing and, even with the fact you had to take it upon yourself to learn how to bind your chest, you were still excited to wear it. It was a frilly and lacy thing, much fancier than anything you had worn since coming here.
Every time you passed it, hanging there along the clothesline, you could feel your heart skip a beat in excitement.
It was a pretty sight as it stood out against your other delicates. Today was a wash day and so all your dirty clothes had been freshly cleaned, leaving you donning a bedsheet like it was some kind of fancy dress worn by a runaway mermaid. You were grateful you had remembered what you learned in Greek history class as it had made DIY’ing up a toga easy. You were just about to pat yourself on the back for a job well done and start making yourself and Grim some dinner when you heard the familiar sound of the front door of Ramshackle being open and slammed shut.
“Can you believe it! I almost got collared again! You’d think Riddle had learned to chill out a bit more after the last time he blew a gasket but—”
You squeaked in horror. Of course, now of all times, Ace just had to have gotten himself in trouble and he just had to make Ramshackle his first stop! You frantically ran back to the main room, tripping on your bedsheet dress all the way as you desperately tried to save your secret.
“Wait! Ace! Don’t come any closer!” You shrieked, voice high pitched and frantic. You couldn’t even try to lower your voice in your panic. Ace let out an equally loud shriek as you barreled past him, your arms outstretched to grab at least your undergarments to hide your shame but the universe just wasn’t on your side as your foot made contact with the hem of your dress, toppling you and your clothesline over in a feat of horrid gravity. A loud crash was the only sound that filled the room as you laid there on the dusty floor, still clothed if a little worse for wear, but with the offending garments laid flat and clearly for Ace to stare in horror at. You felt a deep shame form in your chest as you quickly reached out and snagged your bra away, tucking it tight against your chest. Your heart thundered in your ears as you quickly opened your mouth to try and defend yourself.
“Ace—”
“You’re a girl.”
“Yes, but please, I—”
“I thought you were a boy.” The boy grimaced, obviously struggling to keep eye contact as he turned away.
“I know, I didn’t want to lie to you, Ace, but please think about it from my perspective.”
You watched anxiously as, instead of responding, Ace threw himself on to the couch, his arms covering his eyes like he didn’t want to even look at you. Distraught, you hurried over to him, your blood rushing in your ears. “Please, Ace—” You could feel tears beginning to dot the corner of your eyes. You weren’t even scared of him telling anyone, you were more afraid of the thought of him wanting nothing to do with you after this.
“I didn’t mean to lie to you, I just…”
“You’re a girl and I told you we should sleep in the same bed together!” Ace let out a loud whine, like this was the most important thing on his mind, and kicked his feet around like an embarrassed toddler. From behind his hands, you could see a dark flush coloring his ears. You felt your shoulders stiffen, obviously caught off guard at his reaction while you leaned over the armrest and watched as the blush quickly moved from his ears to his neck.
“Is… that all you're upset about?”
“Yes!” He pulled himself up on the couch to glare at you, his scarlet eyes narrowing, “Of course I’m upset about that! You must’ve thought I was some weirdo or something! Augh!” He threw himself back against the couch again but instead of hiding his face, he only glared up at the ceiling like it had personally offended him.
You took a few steps closer, one slow step after another. You couldn’t help but let out a shy giggle at the embarrassed look on his face, “So you’re not… mad at me?”
Ace’s eyes rolled to the back of his head as he let out a loud snort, “It’s complicated. How about you get me a fancy lunch from the cafeteria to make up for this emotional torment?”
You smiled as Ace turned over to face you, his gaze harsh but softened by the red flush still present on his cheeks. The moment he saw your expression, he rolled his eyes.
“So, like, what. Does anyone else know? Surely, you’d have to have told Crowley what’s up by now.”
“Oh, uh….” You started, eyes immediately finding the fireplace much more interesting then Ace’s expression, “about that.”
Ace immediatly shot up, “You didn’t tell him?!”
You crossed your arms and huffed, “When would I have had time? When the Mirror told me I was magicless? Or maybe I should’ve spoken up when Grim set Kalim’s butt on fire during the entrance ceremony!” You jerked your thumb in the direction to the front door, “Or perhaps when he dumped me here! Alone!”
Ace let out a harsh breath and looked away, returning his eyes back to the cieling. You could tell he was thinking of what to say so you both sat there in silence, the only sound in the dorm being the sound of Grim snoring from down the hall. Ace rubbed his forehead, like the action would help.
“Alright, fine. It’s not that much different than before. You’re just uh… ”
“A girl,” you finished for him.
“Yeah, that.” Ace laughed, “A girl.”
“Listen,” You turned as Ace pulled himself back up to face you. He leaned forward and gestured for you to follow. You did, mirroring him. “No matter what, you’re still my friend so don’t sweat it too much and if anything happens,” Ace reached towards you. His hand seemed to almost cup your warm cheek and for a moment, you felt an involuntary throb beat against your chest. Until you felt a firm and harsh tug on your ear, his fingers gripping your lobe as if trying to tear it off, “Don’t be stupid!!”
You hissed, hands immediately finding his shoulders to push him away, “Ace! You ass!”
Not much changed after Ace had discovered your secret. He still treated you like you were a man although sometimes you could, if you paid attention, find him angling his body a little closer towards yours whenever a rowdy student or two would pass in the hallway or at lunch. He would play it off whenever you gave him a subtle raised eyebrow and would just wink in response. He probably thought he looked so cool. Deuce had even begun to catch on to this as well and he had quickly taken on the role of Guard Dog #2.
“Are these two bothering you?” He would roll his shoulder, as if preparing for a fight. The two offending students nearly jumped out of their skin when he pulled up beside you, arms crossed across his chest.
“No, Deuce. I’m fine!” You reassured him, touched. Even if he only knew you as magicless, the girly side of you couldn’t help but feel blessed to have befriended such a good guy. You mentally promised yourself to buy him a snack later at the cafeteria.
As you, Deuce, and Ace walked to your next class together, Deuce was the first to speak up. “Ah! That’s right! You’ve got a special job in the Unbirthday party tomorrow, right? Have you practiced your parts and made sure the costume fit?”
While Deuce looked at you with something akin to a puppy like excitement, Ace turned his head to the side in embarrassment, still a little sore from the big reveal but otherwise said nothing. Ace was surprisingly good at keeping secrets, having assured you of his silence almost immediately and you trusted him. He might be a huge pain in the ass, but Ace was a true friend.
“I have practiced the lines, Riddle made sure of it!” You laughed, “I think he was more excited than I was! But I could use some extra practice if you two wanted to help me out before the real thing.” You smiled. “We can even make a study session out of it!”
Ace drummed his fingers on his thigh, an obvious look of disinterest on his face while Deuce on the other hand, always eager to find any excuse to make studying more fun, pumped his fist in agreement, “That sounds great! I could really use some help with some of Trein’s lessons and you’ve always done super well in that class!”
“Alright, nerds.” Ace butt in, his arm snaking itself around Deuce’s shoulder, pulling him in, “We can have a little study sesh to help out the Prefect on one condition.” He lifted up a finger and poked his fellow dormmate on the cheek, “Deuce, you gotta be the one to ask Trey to make us some desserts.”
Deuce nearly bit Ace’s finger as it reached forward to poke again but Ace was quick on the withdrawl, “Why’s it gotta be me?”
Ace pulled away and grinned, jamming his hands into his uniform pockets, “Because…” He shared a look with you and Grim, “Not it.”
“Not it.” You echoed and Grim wasn’t far behind, “Not it!”
Deuce’s head whipped from each of you, a look of betrayal evident on his face. You shrugged and smiled and Grim chuckled loudly, “I’m sure Trey will be more willing to loan snacks for your sake then Ace’s.” You tried to reassure him but Deuce only groaned, his head lolling forward.
Later that afternoon, you all, as agreed, met up in Ramshackle. Deuce came in with his arms full of tarts and other delicacies while Ace swung his recycled bag on his arm, the familiar sound of soda swishing around in plastic emanating from the bag. You waved them in, study guides already out and prepared for the four of you.
“I’m starving!” Ace whined, practically throwing his contribution on top of the counter, Deuce was quick to make a small dive for the soda that was teetering too close to the edge, “I can’t think on an empty stomach!”
“Maybe we should eat first?” Deuce offered, a sheepish smile quickly replacing the once annoyed glare as he turned away from Ace to look at you, “Isn’t it a thing to uh… not think too hard when hungry?"
You had never heard that before but you could feel the grips of hunger twist your stomach in small knots. The smell and the sight of the strawberry tard on the counter was enough for you to relent. You nodded hastily, already nearly gliding across the kitchen to take another long whiff. The smell of strawberries was nearly to die for. Grim was, of course, the first one to dig in.
“Let me go!” Grim cried as you held him back by the ribbon, his little paws nearly making biscuits in the air, “I’m becoming ravenous! A beast!”
Deuce on the other hand was quiet. the knife used to cut the tart was a mess and bits of red filling were dripping on the counter. He looked embarrassed.
“Deuce, what the heck did you do to the tart?” Ace leaned over his shoulder and groaned. Deuce glared, an embarrassed blush covering his ears.
“It’s harder than it looks!” he huffed, “Trey makes it look so easy so I thought—”
“It’s fine!” You were quick to reassure him, clapping him on the shoulder. He gave you a relieved look. “It’s just a tart anyways!”
Grim on the other hand was not so forgiving, “I don’t care WHAT shape my tart is, I just want the biggest piece! So hand it over!”
It took longer then you would’ve liked to start eating with how playfully antagonistic Ace was to Deuce and as always, he was an easy target but after a few fake punches and hollering, you four had finally managed to make yourselves comfortable in Ramshackle’s living room. You and Grim had taken your place as hosts on the worn out couch and the two boys had dragged themselves some sort of furniture to use as makeshift chairs.
As soon as your fork full of tart met with your tongue, you couldn’t help but let out a delighted squeal. It hit the exact spot you’ve been craving the past week! The tartness of the strawberries mixed with the sweetness of the powdered sugar and pastry was just what you needed. You all dug in, too hungry to even try to feign conversation, and the pastry shell soon became a war zone.
From his spot beside you, Grim let out a huge belch and patted his rotund belly, a look of absolute bliss on his face. Deuce and Ace weren’t too far behind. So much for studying. You eyed the nearly spotless pan still left on your table. The sweet desire of lazing around clung to you but you didn’t listen. With a sluggish pace, you pulled yourself up and reached for what was left of the tart. You had intended to throw it in the sink and wash it later, but a harsh intake of breath from behind you was quick to steal your attention.
“Uhhh, Prefect?” Deuce blinked, his hand slowly raising to point at you, “Did you sit on a piece of your tart?”
Confused, you reached back. And you felt it. A wet spot.
Your face visibly paled. With a shaking hand, you looked. That was not the red of a strawberry. That was the red of blood. Deuce could see you were becoming visibly upset and made to reach forward, “Hey, it’s ok! I’m sure we can wash it out!”
Ace, shaken out of his food coma, was quick to act, “Ahaha, yeah! That’s right! It’s not a big deal!” His laugh was forced as he watched you shake. A small hiccup escaped you and you sniffled back a sob.
This wasn’t supposed to happen. You were supposed to have a few more days, right? Did you miscalculate? Did it come early? You had been having so much fun with your new friends that you had entirely forgotten. Your period.
“Hey,” Deuce’s soft voice was enough for you to look up and the worried expression he gave you was almost enough to make you burst into tears, “It’s just some tart, alright?” Deuce looked down and frantically patted his pant pockets before pulling out a handkerchief, handing it to you, “It is just some tart, right?”
You took his offering and pressed it against your cheek, a rush of emotions flooding you. Oh geez, since you acknowledged it, your period was making you Feel Things.
“It’s fine, Deuce, I’m sure they’re just embarrassed or—” Ace awkwardly butt in, trying to save face.
But you interrupted him. “It’s not just a tart,” you sniffled, big tears rolling down your face, “I’m on my period.”
Deuce’s hand that had started rubbing comforting circles on to your back abruptly stopped as he blinked at you with wide eyes. He blinked. Again and again.
“Pardon?” He croaked out, his voice high pitched and strained, “Your… your period…?”
Ace let out a loud groan and slapped his forehead. The cat was out of the bag. “You’re really letting Deuce know you’re a girl?”
“All I said was that I was on my period! For all he knew, I could’ve been a boy with a period!” You defended yourself, nearly throwing the tin at his stupid orange head.
“Ace knew?” Deuce’s voice was quiet, his shocked expression slowly falling, “Ace knew but not me?” He looked hurt.
“Oh, Deuce.” You gasped, “Please don’t be upset! Ace wasn’t even supposed to know either!” You reached forward, hesitantly sliding your hands to fold over his. He tensed, visibly upset, but as soon as your hands touched his, he returned your gaze. Deuce looked even more upset then when those delinquents broke the dozen eggs and you were the cause of it.
“Did— did you not trust me?”
“No, Deuce, no… that’s not it at all.” You reassured him.
Ace popped his head on his knuckles as he watched. “Don’t get your pant—”
You glared at him.
“Pants. I was going to say pants! In a twist, Deucey. I just found out a week ago because I nearly walked into their bra hanging off a string.”
“I’m going to kick your ass, Ace.” Deuce gritted out, his brow twitching violently. Ace grinned, noticing the change in his demeanor. He could work with that.
“Yeah,” Ace crossed his arms behind his head and leaned back, deciding that the funniest choice to get Deuce out his slump was to rage bait him, “It was a cute one too! Had one of those little bows on it.”
You flushed darkly and inched back, your arms hurriedly reaching up to hide your chest as you gaped at him. Was he really going there!? Ace snickered at your expression and as he was moving to get a load of Deuce’s face, he was suddenly interrupted by the feeling of metal meeting his face.
“Ow! Did you just throw the tart tin at me!” Ace shrieked,
“I’m going to kick your ass!” Deuce hollered from his spot above him, hands raised high in the air, tin pan in hand. Ace gaped at him, wide eyed, before immediately turning to you,
“P-Prefect! You’re going to help me, aren’t you?!”
You turned away, instead finding the sight of a food coma’d Grim much more interesting. He was even making sleeping biscuits on the pillow he was sleeping on. How cute.
summary: you may or may not have gone crazy and stressed baked last night… at least you’ll have plenty of cookies to share at your first life sim club meeting?
“name, how the fuck did you bake this many cookies in one night?” sethos grumbles as he adjusts the trays in his arms. cyno wordlessly nods in agreement, despite easily carrying most of the trays.
“uhh…” you nervously giggle, “a lot of stress…?”
“did you even sleep last night?” collei sighs. you avoid answering her. “name!”
“i’m sorry!!” you whine, “i’m still freaking out about this philosophy assignment i have.”
“speaking of philosophy-“ sethos shoulder checks cyno before anything else could be said.
“what’s up with your philosophy assignment?” collei asks, ignoring the two.
you sigh, “i have no idea, i wasn’t there when the prof assigned it- but apparently it’s gonna span the whole course, and it’s in partners.”
“and you haven’t picked a partner?” she tilts her head.
“no, my partner picked me. i don’t even know why he picked me.” you grumble. from the corner of your eye, you see her face scrunch up in confusion, then fall flat in realization, and then she’s suddenly speed walking to get ahead of you - turning to walk backwards and face you with the most mischievous grin you’ve ever seen on her face.
“is it scara?!” she manically giggles.
you blanch, “what?! no!”
“hmmm, i don’t know~ you were kinda quick to respond~”
“i mean he did ask but like surely he asked multiple other people, right?”
“scaramouche?” cyno mutters behind you, “he avoids partner work as much as he can. he must like you a lot if he’s willing to partner with you for an assignment.”
while your heartbeat sky rockets at the statement, collei’s smile gets more devious. she starts giggling and singing your name in a teasing tone. you feel your ears burn.
as much as it embarrasses you, you’re glad you have someone like collei in your corner, rooting for your mostly non-existent love life.
escoffier and heizou are standing outside the club room by the time the four of you arrive.
heizou’s shuffling a deck of tcg cards in his hands, looking rather uninterested in whatever escoffier’s rambling about, but he lights up once she points your ragtag group out.
“name, oh my goodness, you really did not have to bake this much!” escoffier exclaims as soon as you’re within earshot.
you bashfully smile, “would you believe me if i say this is only half…?”
her jaw drops. you hear collei sigh behind you.
“i gave away as many as i could!” you try to defend yourself. escoffier takes your tray from you.
“at least we have itto,” heizou says as he takes collei’s tray, “he could probably eat half of these without a problem.”
the life sim club room is cozy. bean bag chairs are splayed around the small space, the tv is hooked to somebody’s switch, and tcg cards litter the table and carpet. it looks like someone hijacked an unused admin room.
tighnari is the first to greet your group.
“hey, we’re all set up.” he has a warm smile on his face. collei eagerly takes a seat next to him. you hesitantly sit next to collei - at least you know you can be comfortable around tighnari and collei.
as soon as heizou and escoffier put your trays of cookies down, itto is uncovering one and scarfing cookies down his mouth. no greeting, no warning, just food. you… kind of respect it. at least someone is enjoying your cookies.
“oh my gosh, what’s up, mini?!” itto says through a mouthful of cookies, “oooo, these cookies are amazing. thanks, mini!”
you giggle, “thanks, itto.”
“you here to learn to play tcg?” he eagerly grabs his tcg deck.
“wha- no, i already said i was teaching her how to play!” heizou complains as he sits opposite from you, still shuffling a deck between his fingers.
the room is loud - too many people are talking over each other, too many mouths are chewing, too many clothes are ruffling. your ears are already ringing with overstimulation, tears beading along your lash line from the bright lights; but, you don’t mind.
you love it here. you’re surrounded by people and you love it.
maybe… you really can fit in.
previous. | masterlist. | next.
AUTHOR’s NOTE
so ummmm its been … a hot minute
am i feeling better ?? not yet ! but i cleaned my room recently to help w my depressive symptoms (also cus i got hayfever so clean ur rooms guys) and i finished my first year of uni !!! im so happy to be done it was such a great experience overall and im excited to add bits and pieces of my experience into name’s :)
ive reworked the plotlines a bit sooo act 2 is actually gonna be longer so i can include more scaraname interactions and develop their friendship before their relationship !! also decided to ditch the miscommunication trope bc . i got miscommunicated irl and it pissed me off so bad i couldnt put name thru it.
anywayyyy as of publishing this im working to finish the rest of act 2 ! andddd i have some ideas for my thoma smau as well as an mha smau :3 yayayaya thank u guys for waiting i love u all sm !!!
ps. im js realizing i can follow back ppl on this blog idk why i thought i couldnt so lmk if u wanna be moots !! i love talking to ppl !!!!!!!!!!
summary: you may or may not have gone crazy and stressed baked last night… at least you’ll have plenty of cookies to share at your first life sim club meeting?
“name, how the fuck did you bake this many cookies in one night?” sethos grumbles as he adjusts the trays in his arms. cyno wordlessly nods in agreement, despite easily carrying most of the trays.
“uhh…” you nervously giggle, “a lot of stress…?”
“did you even sleep last night?” collei sighs. you avoid answering her. “name!”
“i’m sorry!!” you whine, “i’m still freaking out about this philosophy assignment i have.”
“speaking of philosophy-“ sethos shoulder checks cyno before anything else could be said.
“what’s up with your philosophy assignment?” collei asks, ignoring the two.
you sigh, “i have no idea, i wasn’t there when the prof assigned it- but apparently it’s gonna span the whole course, and it’s in partners.”
“and you haven’t picked a partner?” she tilts her head.
“no, my partner picked me. i don’t even know why he picked me.” you grumble. from the corner of your eye, you see her face scrunch up in confusion, then fall flat in realization, and then she’s suddenly speed walking to get ahead of you - turning to walk backwards and face you with the most mischievous grin you’ve ever seen on her face.
“is it scara?!” she manically giggles.
you blanch, “what?! no!”
“hmmm, i don’t know~ you were kinda quick to respond~”
“i mean he did ask but like surely he asked multiple other people, right?”
“scaramouche?” cyno mutters behind you, “he avoids partner work as much as he can. he must like you a lot if he’s willing to partner with you for an assignment.”
while your heartbeat sky rockets at the statement, collei’s smile gets more devious. she starts giggling and singing your name in a teasing tone. you feel your ears burn.
as much as it embarrasses you, you’re glad you have someone like collei in your corner, rooting for your mostly non-existent love life.
escoffier and heizou are standing outside the club room by the time the four of you arrive.
heizou’s shuffling a deck of tcg cards in his hands, looking rather uninterested in whatever escoffier’s rambling about, but he lights up once she points your ragtag group out.
“name, oh my goodness, you really did not have to bake this much!” escoffier exclaims as soon as you’re within earshot.
you bashfully smile, “would you believe me if i say this is only half…?”
her jaw drops. you hear collei sigh behind you.
“i gave away as many as i could!” you try to defend yourself. escoffier takes your tray from you.
“at least we have itto,” heizou says as he takes collei’s tray, “he could probably eat half of these without a problem.”
the life sim club room is cozy. bean bag chairs are splayed around the small space, the tv is hooked to somebody’s switch, and tcg cards litter the table and carpet. it looks like someone hijacked an unused admin room.
tighnari is the first to greet your group.
“hey, we’re all set up.” he has a warm smile on his face. collei eagerly takes a seat next to him. you hesitantly sit next to collei - at least you know you can be comfortable around tighnari and collei.
as soon as heizou and escoffier put your trays of cookies down, itto is uncovering one and scarfing cookies down his mouth. no greeting, no warning, just food. you… kind of respect it. at least someone is enjoying your cookies.
“oh my gosh, what’s up, mini?!” itto says through a mouthful of cookies, “oooo, these cookies are amazing. thanks, mini!”
you giggle, “thanks, itto.”
“you here to learn to play tcg?” he eagerly grabs his tcg deck.
“wha- no, i already said i was teaching her how to play!” heizou complains as he sits opposite from you, still shuffling a deck between his fingers.
the room is loud - too many people are talking over each other, too many mouths are chewing, too many clothes are ruffling. your ears are already ringing with overstimulation, tears beading along your lash line from the bright lights; but, you don’t mind.
you love it here. you’re surrounded by people and you love it.
maybe… you really can fit in.
previous. | masterlist. | next.
AUTHOR’s NOTE
so ummmm its been … a hot minute
am i feeling better ?? not yet ! but i cleaned my room recently to help w my depressive symptoms (also cus i got hayfever so clean ur rooms guys) and i finished my first year of uni !!! im so happy to be done it was such a great experience overall and im excited to add bits and pieces of my experience into name’s :)
ive reworked the plotlines a bit sooo act 2 is actually gonna be longer so i can include more scaraname interactions and develop their friendship before their relationship !! also decided to ditch the miscommunication trope bc . i got miscommunicated irl and it pissed me off so bad i couldnt put name thru it.
anywayyyy as of publishing this im working to finish the rest of act 2 ! andddd i have some ideas for my thoma smau as well as an mha smau :3 yayayaya thank u guys for waiting i love u all sm !!!
ps. im js realizing i can follow back ppl on this blog idk why i thought i couldnt so lmk if u wanna be moots !! i love talking to ppl !!!!!!!!!!
SYNOPSIS — the strange unknown number you vented to about your crush ends up being your crush.
INCLUDES — college + modern au!, smau, crack, fluff, shinso is y/n's campus crush.
PART 02 ⸻ ROLES REVERSED VERSION
ᡣ𐭩 •｡ main masterlist — mha masterlist ꪆৎ ˚⋅
NOTE — if you guys didn't get it, the 'diary entry' shinso wrote wasn't entirely made up bc he acc was staring at y/n LOL! i love his smartass.
soooo unfortunately my meds stopped working :( and i havent been able to write bc of uni :(( depression + stress = inability to function so yeahhh im not in a great place to write rn but good news !!! my first year ends soon yayayayay even tho i feel like i didnt do my best im rlly proud that i managed to stick thru it :DD plus im seeing my psychiatrist soon so hopefully i can figure my medication out :P but yeah !! see u guys soon <3
i just read your smau and i loved it!!! cant wait to see more interactions between scara and name😛
HI ANON !! omgomg first ask ever so exciting !!! thank you for your love !!! im feeling much better now and im cooking up some cute name and scara interactions rn ;3c
