Crowley's Minion

[severussnape1234]

To any holy entity listening, please let this test be negative 😂😂😭😭😭🥲🥲

[severussnape1234]

The one thing I hate about Deanx(someone besides Castiel) is how they always make Dean or Cas so needy for each other. If it's DeanxBenny, there has to be something wrong, and Dean always ends up with Castiel. Why can't it be, when Deanx(someone besides Castiel) it's stays that way! Seriously, I love destiel, it's great, but why do all the good fics up as destiel when the original is just as good?

[thechamberofsecrets]

has been opened

[enemiesofthe-heir]

shit

[professorgilderoy-lockhart]

don’t worry i’ve got this

[harry-ron-andhermione-blog]

no fuck you 

[gi-nnyweasley]

can someone help me rn

[woahdenkirk-blog]

HISS HISS MOTHERFUCKERS

[averywiseanimatedcat]

So here’s the thing- I’m low key mad at Lucifer for leaving, getting married and hurting Chloe. We all know that’s a dick move, but he’s not doing it to be a dick. He’s doing it because he’s hurt and angry. That doesn’t excuse such behavior but also keep in mind that perhaps he doesn’t think Chloe’s feelings are really real. So perhaps he isn’t treating them with the respect he should. We all know Chloe’s going to shut him out and I don’t think he has a hope in hell (excuse the pun) for gaining her trust back again until she finds out who he is. Without knowing that there’s no acceptable reason for his behavior towards her. Keep in mind he isn’t actually a human, so marriage may not hold the same gravity to him as it does to a person. His whole family just manipulated him into a broken heart and he is still dealing with his brothers death. There are reasons for it, not excuses and Chloe definitely won’t give him a get out of jail free card. But I think, like every other character on this show, that Candy is going to be a really interesting addition. And I don’t think she’s going to be in the way of Deckerstar, I would be surprised if the opposite didn’t happen and she didn’t turn into the biggest ship captain ever.

[severussnape1234]

This confused me. I was like, (SPOILER) last time Crowley had Lucifer as his slave because he had spellwork and traps and wards carved into Lucifer's cells!

But then I realized, it's the show Lucifer.....not supernatural.

[o0o-chibaken-o0o]

How to Snag Potter

By Draco Malfoy

1. Midnight Rendezvous: Invite him to a duel and then bond over shared rule-breaking. Didn’t work because Weasley insisted on coming along. Reported them to Filch instead. 

2. Midnight Rendezvous, second attempt: Inspire gratitude by helping him deal with illegal dragon. Possible small talk about my name? Caught by McGonagall

3. Show off amazing Quidditch skills and really cool new broom. Nope. Granger said I bought my way onto the team (NOT TRUE) and I’m pretty sure Potter believed it. 

4. Send carefully composed and endearing Valentine (the only good thing Lockhart has ever done). I don’t think he liked it very much, despite the brilliant lyrics I composed. Ended up shifting blame onto the Girl Weasel. Fairly certain he doesn’t suspect.

5. Become gravely injured in order to appeal to his Savior Complex and inspire feelings of protectiveness. DO NOT ATTEMPT AGAIN. Was nearly murdered when I insulted that giant filthy chicken, and yet Potter decided that IT was the victim?! Unacceptable. I will not rest until that beast is put down.

6. A fun prank! He seems to enjoy stuff like this when the Weasley Twins do it, so I’m sure he will laugh. Learn to sew. It turns out that Potter has no sense of humor as well as very poor vision, because he nearly killed me with that damn Patronus Charm. Although I must admit, it is kind of hot that he can already do a Patronus.

7. Support him with Triwizard Tournament badges! Okay, this one was probably my fault. Pansy saw me experimenting with them and I changed the messages at the last minute. Why can’t he just realize that I don’t mean it?

8. Report Potter’s tragic story to the Prophet to increase sympathy and support. Exaggerate if it will get him more attention. I realize now that Potter does not like attention. Also Skeeter made out like Potter is in some sort of love triangle involving Granger, which is not even remotely acceptable. This was a mistake.

9. Show respect for his friends by composing an encouraging song in Weasley’s honor. Apparently making the title sound complimentary isn’t enough to negate other more insulting lyrics. Honestly this was doomed from the start because there is literally nothing good about the Weasel except his best friend.

10. Impress him with your status and power by leading the Inquisitorial Squad. Umbridge is an absolute menace and I am an idiot.

11. Make him jealous: Flirt excessively with Pansy. I don’t think he even noticed.

12. Show him your sensitive side by crying in the girls’ loo. Fuck.

…

Sorry I haven’t written in a while. 

13. Realize you’ve been a complete arse for your entire life. Regret everything. Do your best to become someone who does the right thing. Don’t identify Potter when asked. Stop cronies from killing him. Apologize sincerely after he gets you off at your trial. Invite him for dinner. 

14. Invite him for drinks. 

15. Buy him a birthday present. 

16. Kiss him. 

17. Go back to his flat. 

18. Refuse to leave his bed. This only works for so long.

19. Attempt to make him breakfast.

20. Come out to the Prophet together.

21. Date for three years.

22. Say “yes.”

[l0vegl0wsinthedark]

Reblogging again because, hello?! It’s bloody perfect. ❤❤❤

[fae-vorite]

Finally finished day 3 of the OTP challenge! I’m just kind of taking it at my own pace at this point. 

I have such a soft spot for Hogwarts AU Draco and Harry so here we go! The prompt was “First time” So I mean, obviously its Harry fucking Draco back in the Gryffindor common room.

[l0vegl0wsinthedark]

Reblogging again cause she my boo @cieliavalentine ❤

[sassparza-deactivated20140618]

[severusdefender]

I've been thinking a lot about POC Snape lately because I saw some awesome fan art (which I conveniently cannot find now) but I was wondering if you had any thoughts on what specific ethnicity or cultural background he'd be from?

 I see him as Somali like me due to how his hair, nose and, yes, skin are described. Some Cushites have thin hair. My dad’s nose was big and hooked like many other Somalis around me. Sallow skin can be pale brown in colour. Light-skinned Somalis exist.

 Before I saw the movies, I didn’t even think that he was british born. I was expecting a Somali accent due how people kept reacting to the things he said. It made sense to me why his comments, which Harry would have brushed off they were said by McGonagall instead, were so enraging to the protagonists. It was because they were spoken in a Somali accent. This is similar to my experience.

There was also the fact that in order to escape crushing poverty, he joined a fascist cult run by the richest in the Magical society. Something that unfortunately has been happening in Somali communities for decades. There was also the disgust he felt for Muggles which again was understandable to me when I remembered that there are millions of Somalis in diaspora who live in fear of deportation and harassment from authorities and non Somalis. It would also make sense why he felt the Wizarding world was better because it wasn’t as steeped with xenophobia.

 Another thing was his father’s reaction to his magic. Somalis hate magic regardless of religion. We believe that only the most corrupt turn to magic. Also parents are responsible for their children’s sins which would explain Tobias’ rage and fear when his son turned out to be a wizard.

I have so many thoughts about Somali Snape. I feel that Snape was coded as non white which is why I assumed he was black instead of automatically thinking he was white. I like this really old post because it goes into older British Literature tropes (x). It validates my headcanons and meta.

[dailywizardwheezes]

He was always sad.

[dungeonbat]

But your fans made many happy endings for you…

[severussnape1234]

Percy: Sorry, I overslept.

Newt: It 5.30 in the afternoon.

Percy: Oh really? I can get another hour in then.

Newt: You can't sleep away your problems.

Percy: Watch me.

[severussnape1234]

me six months ago: omg why would anyone call someone daddy?

me now: colin farrell? did you mean daddy?

[dmdbaka]

me : *sighs* what is life? 

 otp : *enters* hello, bitch

[severussnape1234]

You said you would love me forever.....to you, forever meant 7 months and 11 days.

[severussnape1234]

Hannibal: I know we've been talking about eloping, Will. But I've always wanted a church wedding.

Will: We can't have that, we're in hiding. Who would we even invite?

Hannibal: Chiyoh, Alana, Margot, Bedelia, Freddie, the entire FBI...

Will: Hannibal-

Hannibal: And for a venue I was thinking the Sistine Chapel .

Will: I'm not Catholic.

Hannibal: I'll take care of all the food, so you don't need to worry about that. I love cooking for a large crowd.

Will: I don't think this would work.

Hannibal: We're having a church wedding, Will Graham. You are going to walk down the aisle while a choir of 30 boys sings this ballad in Archaic Latin I wrote for you. You will be married off by Jack Crawford who Chiyoh will hold at gunpoint. Chiyoh will be my best man and she will be wearing every single flower mentioned in Dante's Paradiso and will hold a platinum ring with no fewer than seven diamonds. I've been planning this since I first set eyes on you, Will. It's. Going. To. Happen.

[karthaeuser65]

Snape and his Patronus 

Severus Snape is the only Death Eater capable of casting the charm. His love for Lily Evans was his one redeeming point.

Patronus created from memories, good and happy memories. As we all know, Snape all good memories are about Lily. Lily’s Patronus was a doe, and Snape knew this. After she dies, Snape loves Lily so much that his Patronus changes to that. 

[acklelantern]

I’m wincest trash today and I’ll be wincest trash tomorrow. I’m never going to stop being one. 

[severussnape1234]

me:*takes a deep breath*

me:i lo-

anyone who has spent five seconds around me ever: yes, you love john winchester, we know, you love john winchester so much, he's the light of your life, you love him so much, you just love john winchester, we KNOW, you love john winchester you fucking love john winchester ok we know, we get it, YOU LOVE JOHN WINCHESTER. WE GET IT.