Adventures in Wonderland

MULTI FANDOM BLOG! I am a Ringer/Tolkienite, MacGyverite (2016)l lover of a capella groups, especially the bass singers--The Bass Gang (Gangsta for Life!) and all things pirate,and a member of a galaxy full of other fandoms. Bookwyrm and fanfiction writer, ShadoKat771 on AO3. Portland, Oregon, USA.  Come and feel welcomed!

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

10 Things to Give Up

1. Trying to please, and be acceptable, to others

2. The fear of making a mistake

3. The fear of change

4. A fear of the future

5. Guilt or shame that’s tied to your past

6. Beating yourself up or putting yourself down

7. Over-thinking

8. Living by your feelings

9. The desire to get even with others

10. The tendency to procrastinate.

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“Do not speak badly of yourself - for the warrior within hears your words and is lessened by them.”

— David Gemmel

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you have made or dark images you hold about yourself. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused.”

— Alan Cohen

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

Phrases to Remove from your Life

1. I should have …

2. I shouldn’t have …

3. I ought to …

4. I wish I’d ….

5. If only …

6. Yes but …

7. I could never …

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“Please kill the part of you that believes that your happiness is dependent on another person or another thing. That your dreams won’t come true. That you will never be enough. That you don’t deserve love. There is a power deep inside you that can rise above all these false beliefs. Find it. Nurture it.”

— @loveaprilgreen

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“While you can’t control someone’s negative behaviour, you can control how long you participate in it.“”

— Unknown

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“Darling you deserve it all. Love and peace and joy dancing in your eyes. Hearty deep belly laughter, and the right to let those tears fall and water the soil. You deserve freedom, and goodness, and company, and days of bliss and quiet. You deserve happy, and healed, and content, and safe. So keep going. Go, realize into being the life you deserve.”

— unknown

[two-thirtyy]

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

Look buddy, i’m just trying to make it to Friday.

[taykoutmccleod]

reblog if its friday and you made it

[nuggsmum]

[shrewreadings]

Aten’t dead yet

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“As I look back on my life, I realize that every time I thought I was being rejected from something good, I was actually being re-directed to something better.”

— Steve Maraboli

[ozhawkauthor]

The Three Laws of Fandom

If you wish to take part in any fandom, you need to accept and respect these three laws.

If you aren’t able to do that, then you need to realise that your actions are making fandom unsafe for creators. That you are stifling creativity.

Like vaccination, fandom only works if everyone respects these rules. Creators need to be free to make their fanart, fanfics and all other content without fear of being harassed or concern-trolled for their creative choices, no matter whether you happen to like that content or not.

The First Law of Fandom

Don’t Like; Don’t Read (DL;DR)

It is up to you what you see online. It is not anyone else’s place to tell you what you should or should not consume in terms of content; it is not up to anyone else to police the internet so that you do not see things you do not like. At the same time, it is not up to YOU to police fandom to protect yourself or anyone else, real or hypothetical.

There are tools out there to help protect you if you have triggers or squicks. Learn to use them, and to take care of your own mental health. If you are consuming fan-made content and you find that you are disliking it - STOP.

The Second Law of Fandom

Your Kink Is Not My Kink (YKINMK)

Simply put, this means that everyone likes different things. It’s not up to you to determine what creators are allowed to create. It’s not up to you to police fandom. 

If you don’t like something, you can post meta about it or create contrarian content yourself, seek to convert other fans to your way of thinking.  

But you have no right to say to any creator “I do not like this, therefore you should not create it. Nobody should like this. It should not exist.”

It’s not up to you to decide what other people are allowed to like or not like, to create or not to create. That’s censorship. Don’t do it.

The Third Law of Fandom

Ship And Let Ship (SALS)

Much (though not all) fandom is about shipping. There are as many possible ships as there are fans, maybe more. You may have an OTP (One True Pairing), you may have a NOTP, that pairing that makes you want to barf at the very thought of its existence.

It’s not up to you to police ships or to determine what other people are allowed to ship. Just because you find that one particular ship problematic or disgusting, does not mean that other people are not allowed to explore its possibilities in their fanworks.

You are free to create contrarian content, to write meta about why a particular ship is repulsive, to discuss it endlessly on your private blog with like-minded persons.

It is not appropriate to harass creators about their ships, it is not appropriate to demand they do not create any more fanworks about those ships, or that they create fanwork only in a manner that you deem appropriate.

These three laws add up to the following:

You are not paying for fanworks content, and you have no rights to it other than to choose to consume it, or not consume it. If you do choose to consume it, do not then attack the creator if it wasn’t to your taste. That’s the height of bad manners.

Be courteous in fandom. It makes the whole experience better for all of us.

[ekbelsher]

Truer words were never written.

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“There are only two days in the year that nothing can be done. One is called yesterday and the other is called tomorrow. So today is the right day to love, believe, do and mostly love.”

— Dalai Lama

[un-rare-deactivated20151106]

let’s stop seeing sex as the biggest thing you can do to show someone you love them

[huntinthedwellin98]

everyone knows that the real way to show someone you love them is to find them a really cool rock. not a diamond. just a neat rock that you think they will enjoy

[anonymoussong]

[elvenkingtranduil-deactivated20]

Not a rock THE  ARKENSTONE 

[glorfy-the-bright-haired-ellon]

Why just one rock Why not three Why not the silmarils

[mondknight]

#i’m pretty sure there’s an entire book on the topic ‘why not silmarils’  (x)

[desidesidesi]

And one on why not the arkenstone

[cakeisnotpie]

You’re right. Just get them a ring.

[bcfurs]

[theepolynesian]

Everyone once in a while this makes an re-appearance on my dash and it’s great

[postitforward]

If you’re reading this, stop to take a moment to get grounded with this exercise. How does it make you feel afterward?

[catsbeaversandducks]

The new Omeowcron variation. We’re doomed.

Photo via Bulu Bulu Kehidupan

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“Start now. Start where you are. Start with fear. Start with pain. Start with doubt. Start with hands shaking. Start with voice trembling but start. Start and don’t stop. Start where you are, with what you have. Just… start.”

— Ijeoma Umebinyuo

[promptsforthesoul]

As you write, you will naturally improve. Do not wait until you think you are good enough to start. You are always good enough to start improving.

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“You owe yourself the love you so freely give to others.”

— Unknown