*slow whistle* I'll be honest, "spell check makes you a bad writer" is a new take on me. Never heard that one before. What happened to commiserating over not being able to spell being the hallmark of a writing friend group? 🤣
But also anon your friends sound like they have an "idea" of what a "writer" is, with an image of some word-saint (I'm laughing) that has never opened google to ask "what's another word for __?" in their life. They've yet to accept the reality that putting words on a page is what makes you a writer. Spell-check in writing programs is what makes you an editor without having to look up everything in a dictionary or thesaurus, because unfortunately, 99% of people don't have those memorized.
Now, that being said, there isn't anything wrong with wanting to improve your vocabulary or accuracy! It can speed things along if you tend to write on a deadline (self-imposed or otherwise). But! Shaming others for using spell-check, used in many different professions by professionals, not just creative people, definitely sounds like a weird as hell take invented on a middle school playground that has me simultaneously cringing and laughing at the ridiculousness of it.
Spell-check has historically simply been pattern-recognition to apply grammar rules and a dictionary (included in the program, usually) to flag misspellings. It is *usually* the same thing as opening a physical dictionary and thesaurus (which i assume, hopefully, they are doing as an alternative? Tell me they're not just waiting to see if one of them catches a misspelling and then having a shame circle about it). Microsoft Word actually has a place in its settings where you can check or uncheck what exact grammar rules it flags, and change what language dictionary it uses (useful for those writing between american and british english, also the reason some words get flagged despite both spellings being correct).
Now, if this is a weird spillover about ai in spell-check in the current age, there's still no reason to shame anyone over it. The real issue is that AI inclusion in the spell-check system seems to be actively be making it shittier, even flagging correctly spelled words, only to suggest misspellings. So if you don't have a good basis in spelling/grammar/a large vocabulary, it could catch you off guard or possibly make you even worse at any of those things through bad habits formed by outright incorrect information.
As for what to do if that's a concern for you, ellipsus (which is an online writing webside made to be an alternative to google docs) seems to have a fairly simple and useful spell-check that you can turn on and off at will. I haven't used either google docs or microsoft word in a while, but from my understanding, either will still flag most incorrect words and grammar rules, you may just have to double-check the "corrections" from another source (a dictionary or online/a beta friend who knows their grammar). I personally just don't want to support either of those programs right now, which is why I use ellipsus (ai-free and free to use, constantly getting new ways to support writers in fandom). I will admit that it isn't currently very ideal for more complex tasks like making charts, graphs, ect. if you use those in your process.
One way to get better at spelling and increase your vocabulary is simply by reading more and writing down new words you come across. Getting them in the context of a story or sentence does wonders for remembering them. As for grammar, English is a beautiful, mystifying, hellish language that is also perpetually changing, and while you can learn many rules you will never know the fullest extent of them. Play around and figure out what your sentence structure/style is, and then find what rules apply to your style if you want. The caveat: if you use writing as a creative medium, there are literally no rules. You CAN just do whatever you want. Whether it's understandable is another thing, but so long as you have fun and can mostly explain it to those you show it too, go wild 🤣
All of that to say: if your writing group is shaming you for using spell-check, they are vastly underestimating the amount of work that goes into writing, fanfiction or original work or otherwise. Spell-check is simply one of those tools that made the manual task of PHYSICALLY opening a dictionary easier.
Even if their perspective is being influenced by any ai-aversion, there is absolutely no reason to call spell-check a "crutch" or a "cheat code" or only for "newbies", that's a really weird take and if they don't listen to reason and keep falling for peer pressure, I'd find new writing friends.
