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Cosmic Funnies

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Jar Jar Binks Fan Club

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2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Game Changer & Make Some Noise

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★
Cookie Run:Kingdom Official!
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@shadow42500
he knows your ip address
do cock
✨️ The Enrichment has Enriched! ✨️
Had what we call in the business a stupid day so as usual, some completely self indulgent stuff, self insert giving TSSM otto a cheek kiss.
he's flirting
Came back to post this unfinished Spamton animatic and skedaddle back into the void (probably)
Song: Who Are You, Really? - Mikky Ekko
This is my first time drawing Spamton lol
The obsession is BAAAADDD but it doesn't matter, it's better than drug isn't? Here's my contribution, cooked with love. Bonus under the cut
This comic is a hate letter to every godamn pants that are made like they should never be bend. Those pants so hard that they cut you in half when your sit or break open.
shoutout to spamton my favorite misogynist
audio here
Sooo….been into USM Ock for the past few months and decided to make an edit for him 😭😭😭 mans deserved better
had a bad low blood pressure moment last night and messily asked my partner for saltines and water before realizing i should probably ask for the Blood Pressure Medication I Need To Take. while they went to go grab it though i still had water and crackers so in a daze i took a swig of water but didnt swallow and then tried to cram 2 saltines in my mouth. full of water. in bed. with mouth full of water
Boxhead Devouring Two Saltines, 2024
Oh My God Damn
"Sir Pentious, reporting for duty!"
CHOMP!
(Based on this adorable video)
do u think anyone’s told alfred molina he’s a milf
Cephalopod Science 🐙🧑🔬🥽🧑💻⚛️
So, remember the scene where the symbiote takes down the Sinister Six piloting Peter's body? Well, what if Shocker manages to get it off of Peter and they just see this kid in boxers and a tank top who's dead asleep? And poor Peter wakes up, almost has a panic attack, and is clearly confused by what he's doing in the park when he last remembers getting into bed. The Six is like, "Oh, crap. We almost killed this random kid instead of Spider-Man." The symbiote tries to force itself back onto Peter and absolutely no one is having it.
Later, when Venom tries the "Peter Parker is Spider-Man" reveal, the supervillains call it out on trying to pin some innocent kid with being Spidey, when it's clearly just ticked that Peter didn't like getting possessed and is trying to ruin his life for no good reason.
Electro is definitely the one to charge in first to defend Peter because 1. He knew Peter and the guy is a nerd who kept getting shoved into lockers and trying to imagine the two as one and the same is dumb and 2. OH MY GOD THAT'S PETER! LIKE "THE GUY WHO REMEMBERS EVERONES BIRTHDAYS AND BUYS THEM TREATS EVEN WHEN HIS FAMILY IS GOING THROUGH ROUGH TIMES" PETER!!!! WHY HIM????
Shocker is probably the second to go help because he is a Professional and he has Standards. Namely, not getting kids involved. Kid is too skinny anyhow, needs some more meat on his bones. And a blanket. He's the one who, after getting that symbiote away, actually knows what to do in terms of first aid and getting him warm and checking for shock and such.
Sandman and Rhino probably join in the fight to knock things around mostly. It's not to say that they're unconcerned about the fact that they almost just killed a random kid. More like they don't know how to process it so they shrug and get to helping the fight by throwing things at them.
Doc Ock probably rains in everyone named previously and after directing the fight in a more productive direction, actually looks over Peter for injuries. A man who was willing to attach robotic arms attached to his spine has to know the basics of anatomy and taken a few classes about it. He's not called doctor for nothing. Very calmly and clinically asking Peter to rate his pain on a scale of 1 to 10 while Rhino is throwing cars over the two of them and electricity is going everywhere.
Vulture only gets involved when Doc tells him to take Peter back to one of the many safe houses/labs/meeting spots around town since the boy is obviously confused and in shock. Doc would like to ask them questions about the odd black substance that seems determined to get to him. Vulture gets Peter up and out of the fight and kinda cares? Like, yeah, this is a child, and this is a messed up situation, but he'd much rather be getting revenge on Osborne or the Spider right now. Might recognize him as Harry Osborne's best friend? Maybe?
So, Peter ends up at one of the many safe houses the villains have, wearing clothes borrowed from Electros old closet (the closest to his size), squished next to Rhino on the couch (to better warm up because Rhino is a human furnace), Electro is both very happy to catch up with Peter and very unhappy at the circumstances, Sandman is grubling about not being able to squash spider man with Vulture, Doc is "not interrogating" Peter about the symbiote, and Shocker is actually trying to get this kid some food because city people apparently don't know how to feed people properly because the kid is skin and bones (it's the hypermotabilism, thanks spider powers).
YES YES SPECTACULAR SYMBIOTIE STUFF GRRRRR
I was inspired, I suppose. Enjoy my blurb that may or may not be entertaining
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Montana was at a loss. Spider-man hadn’t made any of his normal quips since their fight had begun, and he seemed to be extra ruthless, no longer seeming to care if any of the Six got hurt while he fought them. Electro was currently trapped underneath Rhino, and Spider-man had just jumped off the bridge. The Six moved towards their downed comrades, ready to move the armored titan off of Electro.
“Wait, he’s trying to escape again!” Vulture’s words immediately threw Montana and Ock into action, the doctor’s limbs throwing him over the edge as he lunged for the arachnid-themed hero. Spider-man turned, and threw the sewer grate as he tried to disappear once more.
Montana wasn’t about to let that happen though, as he had moved as stealthily as he could towards the bug. As he faced Ock, Montana stood behind him, firing his gauntlets as quickly and efficiently as he could.
He didn’t expect it to hit, the annoying bug was always able to dodge sneak attacks. Luck was on his side, however, as Ock had dodged the grate and grabbed Spider-man by his arms and legs once again. He expected a pained scream to escape from the do-gooder. There was no way his gauntlets wouldn’t cause him pain. What he didn’t expect, however, was said hero’s costume to scream and writhe in agony. Even so, he kept the shock stream going. He was sure his confusion was clear on his face, the same way that he saw it on the faces of his comrades.
The black suit began to sludge off of the boy dangling from Ock’s arms. And it was a boy, no older than 16 wearing a white tank-top and pajama pants. The inky black goop that had fallen off of him was rolling away, putting as much distance between itself and the stream of his gauntlets as possible.
“Is that-“ Ock had started talking, but before he could finish his sentence the kid’s eyes flew open, brimming with confusion and terror.
“W-where am I?” His eyes were darting around the clearing, trying to take in all the information he possibly could. “What’s going on? I-I just went to bed, why am I here?” It was at that moment that Montana realized they hadn’t been fighting Spider-man, just some kid that had been a puppet for whatever that goop was. His eyes scanned the clearing wildly, just in time to see the mud slinging itself toward the boy at lighting fast speeds.
“Oh no ya don’t!” Montana’s voice was gravelly, and he knew how this must look to the kid. He was brought back into consciousness in the middle of a battle he shouldn’t have been a part of, with villains surrounding him at every turn. Not to mention Ock had yet to let go of his appendages. Still, he wasn’t about to let some kid be used the way he had been (he had morals, even if they were shady at best). He turned his gauntlets at the mud and began firing at it, determined to keep the kid from meeting what he could only imagine would be a horrible fate.
Ock had taken to inspecting the boy closer, his face paling as he was dragged closer to the villain’s face. “You’re just a child. There is no way you are Spider-man.” He let his eyes slide over to Montana, who was valiantly keeping the muddy looking substance at bay. “Do you know what is happening?” The boy shook his head, and he could see the signs of a mental disturbance. If the evidence presenting itself was true, then their true enemy that night had been the suit, which had simply been using the boy as nothing other than a means to an end. “I am a doctor, I will ensure that you will survive while Shocker deals with the monster that imprisoned you.” The boy’s eyes widened again, and he nervously nodded with an audible gulp. As was to be expected, he was face to face with the great Doctor Octopus after all. But, he had nothing to fear from the villain, as he was sure the child had not been a willing participant in the nights events. It was evident by the differences between the real Spider-man and the quiet yet ruthless opponent they had been fighting.
“Peter?” Electro had finally been freed from Rhino, it would seem. And it would also seem he knew their… guest?
“Max?” At Electro’s heated energy spiking in rage, he quickly corrected himself. “I-I’m sorry. Electro.” The fury radiating from Electro quickly extinguished into something akin to concern.
“What are you doing here? Doc, what’s he doing here?” Electro’s gaze had quickly shifted over to Ock, as if he had all the answers.
“From my deductions of the evidence around us, it would seem the boy was being used as a means to an end by the mud creature Shocker is currently fighting off. Will you help him in his escapade as I tend to… Peter, was it?” Electro jumped into action, ready to defend the boy that had always been kind to him before his accident, as Peter numbly shook his head.
Ock moved himself and the boy back onto the bridge where he began to look over the child. He was mentally chastising himself for not realizing sooner that they were not fighting that insufferable arachnid and instead a weird creature that had bonded to an unwilling host. Outwardly, he was looking over the boy to ensure his wellbeing. He seemed to be fine, if a little pale and clammy. Nothing a good night’s rest wouldn’t fix.
It was at that moment that Electro and Montana made their way back up to the bridge, Montana holding a squirming trash bag. He must have found somewhere, though Ock wasn’t sure if he wanted to know the full story. (He didn’t, Montana had had to kick over a trashcan, pull out the full bag while splashing juices everywhere, and then dig through to bottom to find an unused bag, all while shooting at the mud to keep it away from the kid).
“Is he okay Doc?” Electro’s voice was oozing with concern, and Montana gave him a stare that clearly read ‘why do you care so damn much?’ Electro offered a sheepish grin in return. “I knew him before the accident. He was always really sweet, if a little distracted. If I remember right, he was trying to help his aunt.” Electro shot a glance at Peter, and the boy’s face seemed to soften out of his scared state as he regarded Electro.
“Yeah, I was trying to help my aunt.” His voice was soft, but his features quickly schooled themselves into something harder. “If you don’t mind my asking, what was I doing here? I really don’t remember anything aside from laying down.”
“From what I can reckon, this” Montana held the trash bag up “black goopy thing was usin’ ya like a puppet. Tried copyin’ Spider-man.” The boy’s face grew paler than it already was, and that was a feat in and of itself. He then took a moment to look at the kid, and he found himself bristling with agitation. The poor guy was skin and bones! He looked like he ate very rarely, if at all. He steeled himself in his next words, knowing that the others wouldn’t like what he had to say. But Electro seemed to like the kid, and Sandman and Vulture were trying to wake the sleeping Rhino, so really, all he would have to deal with was Ock’s reaction.
“Ya want ta get somethin’ ta eat kid? My treat.”
Imagine because of his spidey sense; he becomes really jumpy and flinches away whenever one of the Six gets too close or shouts too loud, but they all just think he has really really bad anxiety.
They think they found a small, wet possum child and not the local Cryptid